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[sugcrhcney]

[ ZENDAYA COLEMAN, CIS FEMALE, SHE/HER, 22 ] Whenever I hear LET ME IN by GROUPLOVE it always makes me think of MARILYN WEST. They have been so COMPASSIONATE & THOUGHTFUL, but occasionally they have gotten a little bit LENIENT & DISORGANIZED through the years. They currently work as a COMMUNITY OUTREACH SPECIALIST. A YELLOW SUNDRESS BLOWING IN THE WIND, THE HAND THAT REACHES OUT JUST IN TIME TO SAVE YOU & AN INSPIRING SMILE makes them easy to spot on the strip.

STATISTICS

full name: marilyn francesca west.

nicknames: mari.

age: 22.

sexuality: pansexual.

gender: cis female.

languages: english, french & italian.

occupation: community outreach specalist.

drinks, smokes, & drugs: occasional, no & no.

bad habits: biting her nails.

secret talent: good at singing.

hobbies: does a lot of tapestry work in her spare time. 

fears: clowns & heights.

five positive traits: compassionate, thoughtful, thorough, cooperative & focused.

five negative traits: lenient, disorganised, sarcastic, blunt & argumentative.

tattoos: small starburst tattoo on the inside of her left forearm.

piercings: various ear piercings.

parent names: anthony & faye lamont.

parent relationship: nonexistent. 

sibling names: one brother & two sisters - surname lamont.

sibling relationship: rocky, mostly nonexistent.

children: none.

pets: golden retriever named butterscotch.

BIOGRAPHY

marilyn is a child when she realises being born into the lamont family is tainted. she doesn’t stand a chance at a normal life as long as she adorns that cursed name. all opinions about her are based on her surname, on who her family are and who she must be because of that. 

her parents were good people, for the most part. they played a hand in the life that marilyn wanted so desperately to break away from them, but they were caring and did their best by their children. marilyn was the youngest of four and their last child. most would blame marilyn for that, but faye had always wanted four children and been very outspoken about that. it hardly helped that marilyn was so vocal about her hatred for what their family represented. 

at eighteen, marilyn’s wish for detachment was granted in the form of her surname changing from lamont to west. it finally felt like she was free. it felt like she would be able to be her own person, to forge the way for peaceful work within the community. what marilyn did not realise, however, was that with her change in surname, her loyalty to her family would be tried and tested. she had never dreamed that having her surname changed would result in her being utterly alone, a family torn in two. 

in hindsight, it made sense that marilyn would not be with her family much longer after her name change. how could she justify being so outspoken in certain issues when she was cosying up to the very family that had made her so distrustful in the first place? it is not to say that she does not hold anything but love for her family, though resentment has wormed its way into her heart after four years of being alone. blood does not equal loyalty and she has come to realise that. 

WANTED CONNECTIONS

SIBLINGS - when marilyn separated herself from her family name, she lost every member of it. including the siblings she had relied on for so long. whether they agreed with the lives her parents lead or not, they were her lifeline, the only people she felt she could truly count on. losing them was as if she had lost a limb. she hopes to one day be in a position where they can tolerate being in the same room without sparking an argument, but previous attempts have proved unsuccessful. she does her best to avoid them for now, until they can quash their ill feelings of one another. 

EX PARTNER - they were of similar age, between 16 and 18 when they were together. they were happy. they were marilyn’s only true escape from her miserable home life. until they, too, became entangled in the web of lies and deceit that had claimed her parents. marilyn tried for one last attempt for them to follow her, leave that life behind and make something of themselves together. she longed for a life outside of the mayhem caused inside of that circle and she desired for them to join her, stay safe and alive. but they refused and marilyn left her home to pursue something bigger and better. she left them behind. 

CLOSE FRIEND - marilyn does not have many these days. she is unsure of who to trust, so to have somebody that she calls a friend and reveals her deepest, darkest secrets (at least, the ones she can stomach to speak out loud), means more to her than she may be able to let on. they would double as somebody she works with in order to help better the community. somebody that also has a bad taste in their mouth when they think about the things going on behind closed doors and wants to pull people away from that life and help them to look forward, towards a new day. 

[sugcrhcney]

𝐬𝐨𝐟𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭  \  sentence starter pack,  i.  feel free to change wording  \  pronouns as you see fit. 

don’t go. 

please, don’t go. 

it hurts. 

this hurts. 

we can’t be friends. 

you shouldn’t be here. 

stay here with me. 

it doesn’t feel like you care. 

i can’t feel your heart. 

i’m so alone. 

i need you here, with me. 

there’s nothing left. 

we’re up in flames, the both of us. 

it all comes crashing down. 

i don’t know what to do. 

you won’t go with me? 

why don’t you stay here? 

i’m going alone.

my heart’s broken. 

they broke your heart. 

where did this come from? 

how did you get this scar? 

who is {name}? 

what are you saying? 

i shouldn’t have come here. 

it’s like we’ve become strangers. 

who hurt you? 

who did this to you? 

please, don’t ignore me.

please, say something. 

is there something i should know?

i’m not leaving you here. 

you can’t do this to me. 

after all that we’ve been through… 

there’s something you need to know. 

[sugcrhcney]

❥   𝐑𝐈𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐀 ����𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒   [    𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐙𝐄𝐃    ]   .

randomized rihanna lyrics from my own personal favourite songs of hers .    feel free to change any gendered language to your needs .    some lyrics are modified to be more usable .

“   what  do  you  want  from  me ??   ” “   you  know  i  dealt  with  you  the  nicest .   ” “   what  the  fuck  are  you  complaining  for ??   ” “   i  tried  to  buy  your  pretty  heart ,   but  the  price  was  too  high .   ” “   don’t  bother  texting  me  in  a  crisis .   ” “   i’ve  got  to  do  things  my  own  way ,   darling .   ” “   if  you  play ,   you  play  for  keeps .   ” “   you  needed  me .   ” “   you  love  when  i  fall  apart .   ” “   your  aura  is  incredible .   ” “   all  that  i  wanted  from  you  was  to  give  me  something  that  i  never  had .   ” “   don’t  quit  loving  me .   ” “   you’re  so  afraid  to  cry .   ” “   if  you  don’t  have  to  go ,   don’t .   ” “   i  choose  to  be  happy .   ” “   kiss  it  better ,   baby .   ” “   baby ,   don’t  you  leave .   ” “   don’t  leave  me  stuck  here  in  the  streets .   ” “   will  you  ever  respect  me ??   ” “   you  will  never  have  another  like  me .   ” “   it’s  time  to  change .   ” “   just  pull  the  trigger .   ” “   it  hurts  when  i  look  you  in  your  eyes .   ” “   didn’t  they  tell  you  that  i  was  a  savage ??   ” “   will  i  ever  see  another  sunrise ??   ” “   no  matter  what  i  do ,   i’m  no  good  without  you .   ” “   who  am  i  to  hold  your  past  against  you ??   ” “   i’m  tired  of  being  played  like  a  violin .   ” “   when  you  hold  me ,   i’m  alive .   ” “   what  are  you  willing  to  do ??   ” “   you  look  so  dumb  right  now .   ” “   it’s  too  late  to  think  of  the  value  of  my  life .   ” “   what  do  i  have  to  do  to  get  into  your  motherfuckin’  heart ??   ” “   i  hope  that  you  see  this  through .   ” “   please  recognize  that  i’m  trying .   ” “   don’t  tell  me  you’re  sorry ,   ’cause  you’re  not .   ” “   let’s  get  it  over  with .   ” “   baby ,   i  love  you .   ” “   i  don’t  wanna  do  this  anymore .   ” “   i  was  flying  ’til  you  knocked  me  to  the  floor .   ” “   he’s  the  one  i’d  die  for .   ” “   something  in  the  way  you  move  makes  me  feel  like  i  can’t  live  without  you .   ” “   i  want  you  to  stay .   ” “   you  got  me  smiling  all  the  time .   ” “   i  won’t  lie ,   i’m  falling  hard .   ” “   you  got  the  sweetest  touch .   ” “   you  can  have  me  all  you  want .   ” “   what  are  you  living  for ??   ” “   we  all  want  love .   ” “   baby ,   you’re  a  challenge .   ” “   cheers  to  the  freakin’  weekend .   ” “   let’s  explore  your  talent .   ” “   i  swear  you  got  me  losing  my  mind .   ” “   i’ll  drink  to  that .   ” “   life’s too short to be sitting around miserable .   ” “   no  pain  is  forever .   ” “   i  can’t  just  let  you  run  up  on  me  like  that .   ”

[sugcrhcney]

@zendaya: I have standards I don’t plan on lowering for anybody… including myself.

[sugcrhcney]

zendaya: I will not succumb to your peer pressure lol