suhmokey

[suhmokey]

you tell any adult over the age of 50 that you're looking for a job and they're frothing at the mouth to offer insight bc they think your young and/or lazy ass has never even conceived what they're about to tell you. and it's printing your resume onto a very disposable piece of paper and walking into the workplace and handing it to a random employee

[suhmokey]

[suhmokey]

Yes, these Muppets have taken Manhattan. The question now is can they HOLD it

[suhmokey]

you dumb asshole, you just won $0,000

[suhmokey]

[suhmokey]

Homestuck was absolutely complete disaster of a narrative in a lot of ways by the end but I hate it when people act like homestuck is, like Vivziepop Type Bad. For whatever critiques you can make of homestuck it being shallow or creatively bankrupt are just not accurate ones and it drives me up a wall to see people who have never read it act like it's just kind of a substanceless relic of outdated internet humor and fandom cringe. It's crazy how many people are willing to sing praises for shit that's downwind of homestuck like deltarune (and chapter 4 is by far the most homestuck deltatune has ever been by a significant margin) while also being able to completely write off the idea that homestuck has anything worth engaging with in it.

[suhmokey]

[suhmokey]

[suhmokey]

[suhmokey]

My secret is that my wife was in an extremely bad period in her life when she entered into a contest for knitting supplies. She loved knitting as a teenager and wanted to get back into it as an adult, but felt like we couldn't afford it. She wouldn't buy anything, and wouldn't let me get anything for her because it would be "a waste of money." So when she got an email from a knitting newsletter she followed talking about the contest, she entered and won third place - a little basic kit that got her excited to start and started pulling her out of her dark place.

This is when you go "aha. You cheeky devil. Did you cheat slmehow? Is that your secret?" But no. My secret is, I faked it all. I created a fake knitting blog, and sent it to her as "something I found." I ran it for a few months talking about made up craft projects with photos off the internet and things. Then I faked the contest, sold some of my possessions to buy the "prize" and let her win. Six months later I stopped posting and she didn't even notice. She still talks about that prize she won as turning her life around, and she'll never know I invented the whole thing.

Now this is some real lover shit!!!

[suhmokey]

Just one? King Cone...no, Drum Stick, wait...Strawberry Shortcake, no...Chocolate Eclair...

[suhmokey]