my name is suiyee, and i'm a 17 year old student living in nyc. ♥
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Ray Ban Sunglasses Official Charity Event!
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The official charity event of Ray-Ban sunglasses, all styles of glasses are only $24.99! We will donate 50% of the profits to the COVID-19 epidemic prevention department. Every purchase is your support for charity, thank you!
Click to buy>>>Enter the online store
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Ray Ban Sunglasses Official Charity Event!
@oso-blanco @vanilleetplume @sheaswagg-blog @serenityiskey-blog @ahighthought-blog1 @heavensbasement @shootingstars-xox-blog @darryville-blog @that90sshoww-blog @fulltimeplayer-blog @cocololo2-blog @joseislife @driveshesaid @freaknastyzel @jamnsontheartist @dreambiglovehardbestrong @ioshid @jadorelisanny @bossmanbrandon-blog-blog @kayystackss-blog @giqix09-blog @luciddreamtlife @stitchednewyork-blog @raaaaaaaaffff @kimmyxlove-blog @ilovemybabyjesus @naniloveeex3-blog @fightclubbx3-blog-blog @kingdanaaaa-blog @asiya-the-minimalist
The official charity event of Ray-Ban sunglasses, all styles of glasses are only $24.99! We will donate 50% of the profits to the COVID-19 epidemic prevention department. Every purchase is your support for charity, thank you!
Click to buy>>>Enter the online store
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Here goes nothing/ life update
It’s nice to know I’ve grown up since the last time I found myself here. Bio still says I’m 17. I’m 24 now... Amazing how time flies right?.... I started this when one of my favorite people on this earth left this world. Man, I just know the influence you would’ve had on my young adult years would’ve been so incredible. I visited your momma on memorial day. The older I get, the more I realize how thankful I am for such a big family. We’ve had so many additions to the family. We just keep growing, and despite some differences, it’s beautiful to see how far we’ve all come. Can’t help but admire our progress.
Back to me being 24.... I’m still trying to figure it out. Kevin died a few years ago. When I started dating Charlie I gave my all into that relationship. I cut ties with everyone from the past, despite knowing where I stood with these people. Three years go by and Kev doesn’t hear from me. Maybe a few pokes on facebook here and there. A few messages exchanged, nothing major...“Hope all is well”.... “Thanks for the lessons”. Three weeks prior, we reconnect. I didn’t know how to feel. I didn’t hug you, all you wanted was a hug. It was awkward. Four weeks later and I’m in all black standing next to Brian trying to make sense of it all. You ever stop and think about how precious life is? I wish I could’ve checked on you then. Please check on your strong friends. Mental health is real. I hope you read my messages on facebook. I hope you’re at peace.
I cut ties with Shayne. He had a baby with that girl he was with for ages. Good for him I guess? That didn’t really work out well for him... but I wish him nothing but the best.
Nothing broke my heart the way Charlie did when he made that tape... the one where he gives away a part of him that belonged to me. I don’t remember how many times I went back. Over and over again. Have you ever somehow felt healthy in a toxic space? I’ll admit I started to become toxic myself. I came back from spring break in Miami... full of temptation and that night I did the exact thing you did to me. And that experience made me fearless. All these experiences have. I might’ve gotten a little carried away, but I was never out for revenge. It sort of just happened ya know?
And here I am now. 24, lots of mistakes later... but I’m great. I’m wise, but I still make shit decisions.... and that’s okay. the heart wants what it wants. I fucked up. I’m not proud. I try not to bring that kid up too often. Theres consequences for every bad decision I make. Still working on this one..Letting time unravel (as we speak). I’m waiting for the day someone loves me in the depth my father loves me. :)
Hopefully getting to see dad soon... because god only knows how I spent every childhood birthday wish wishing to see my poppa bear. Hopefully taking a trip to Asia this year. God willing. Travel is the only thing that truly makes you richer. I can’t wait to see the world. Moms fun to travel with, but I’m ready for a solo tour. Just waiting on the balls to go for it...
In the meantime....
I’m going back to school. I promise. All these graduation post on social media are giving me anxiety. Like they do every year. They make me feel all the pressure of getting through this decade in my life where I constantly feel like I’m not where I’m suppose to be. That’s normal right? Here’s a reminder to myself, that no matter how many times I change my major, go through these dead end jobs or entertain shit that’s not influential to my future... I’ll be okay. I’m doing just fine.
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Memories
We were probably like 10 minutes away from the bowling alley that night. Late nights of the usual bowling spins, riding in Kim’s Si and introducing Charlie to the newfound OG fam. For two people I’d just recently met, the outpouring love you guys received said a lot about your character. What a lesson I never want to witness again. I can’t ever imagine someone telling my mom I left this earth. So many regrets for how we could’ve done something different. I guess it’s true they say when god wants you he takes you. I don’t exactly understand the reasoning behind why things work out the way they do, but I’d like to believe that that job belongs to a higher power. I know time heals all wounds, I just pray your family gets through this with all the love and comfort they deserve. Not enough sorries in this world I could say to your mom Justin. .. and Joe I couldn’t even look at your mom because she instilled this fear in me that made me nervous. Rest easy guys.
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Maybe one day I’ll get out of this hell hole, just like you did. Maybe one day I’ll be able to see you again. Maybe one day This won’t be so hard But damn, I’m still hoping this is one big twisted joke
Please come back.. (via holdingon-to-lettinggo)
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It's been a while
Been so long since I've been on tumblr. Anyone that knows me knows I only come on here when things are going bad. Although my year hasn't been perfect, it's been a long time since I've even felt the need to let steam off. This week my life changed so much. I lost two friends two nights ago and it still doesn't even feel real because I watched my whole thing happen. It's been a while since I've prayed this much. I just want everything to not feel the way it feels.
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Life throws this amazing thing at you and it all seems too good to be true. Saw him for just a day, god knows how much I appreciated that... knowing how many risks he took. Its been an incredible magical rollercoaster, and I only pray it continues to grow. Maybe he has a way with words, or maybe he's got his charm, but I've never gotten along with someone so well. The way you make me see my own worth, and appreciate everything about me. You make me feel like I'm on top of the world, always so positive and blessed with this amazing energy. He's one of those hard to find men, that put a high value on their significant other, treat her like royalty and makes sure she knows she is too. I'm blessed to have you be a part of my life, lucky to be the one who gets to experience this journey with you. The way you set goals and standards, refuse to settle for failure it waste their time on what everyone mainstream is doing. I love that you're you, you are who you are. I hate saying goodbyes, but I know everything will work out in the end. Goodbyes aren't ever really a dismissal because we both know its an ill see you later. .... I could write for days and days about how I feel for you, but I don't think any length of writing would ever justify to others what I feel when I'm around you.
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