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[sun-pluto]

How Can I Love Myself More?

This is a quick reading on how you can love yourself more. Choose a pile based on your intuition, not your physical eye. If more than one pile calls to you, there may be messages for you in different piles. If none of the piles call to you or seem to resonate, this simply may not be your reading. If so, I'll catch you at the next one! If choosing piles is hard for you, try a random number generator! Ask your guides or the Universe to direct you to a pile that has a message for you, then see what number comes up.

Always remember that tarot is a vague snapshot into a constantly changing future. Please use my readings as a way to discover more about yourself and offer guidance, but don't let it dictate your life. Don't hand over your power to a reading. Let tarot empower you to be your best, do lots of introspection, and make choices aligned with who you discover yourself to be!

Pile One

For everyone who chose this pile, I’m getting that the main way you can love yourself more is by choosing how to spend your energy better. There’s a lot of you here suffering from major burnout, major fatigue, maybe even some of you dealing with energy vampires. This is also for my people who have been waiting on something for a very long time. Maybe you’ve been manifesting for something and patiently waiting for the results, or maybe you’re in a season of winter and have been patiently waiting for your spring for a long time. Whatever the case is for you guys, your energy is spent, and I’m seeing you guys wasting what little you have on fruitless pursuits. Arguing with others, defending your ego, standing ten toes down when you’ve been proven wrong, take what you can. Maybe it’s nothing as serious as that, maybe you’re wasting 8-10 hours a day on TikTok, rotting away in bed, anxious over the past and things you can’t change. This is a downward spiral that does you no good. If this is you, you need to figure out a way to put your energy toward worthwhile pursuits. Learning something new, making new memories, making progress on current projects, cleaning and clearing your space, etc. Find something positive and good to put your energy toward. You’ll end up feeling better about yourself. Because when you’re so stuck and fixated on the negative aspects of your life, when you stay stuck in the past without moving forward, you become a product of self-neglect. Someone said this, and I’m just paraphrasing, but when you don’t succeed at something, when you don’t even try or when you try and fail and don’t attempt it again, when you stay stuck, you’re breaking the bond of trust you have with yourself. You’re telling yourself you don’t trust yourself not to screw up again. And then your mind keeps replaying everything you’ve ever done wrong, you can’t focus on anything other than every single way life has gone wrong, and you can’t find a way forward. The key to breaking this cycle is self-love, and for you guys, you need to spend your energy doing things that are going to build up that trust within you again. Clean your room, and you’ll see that you can finish something you start. Make progress on a personal project with no stakes, and you’ll see that you can improve things you love. Learn something new, and you’ll see you are capable of change.

There needs to be a fundamental shift in how you go about your day. Having fun is great, but doing mindless entertainment for most of the day takes your time and energy almost without you noticing. I remember when I deleted all of my social media for like a month. Without all the scrolling and posting, I almost didn’t know what to do with all of my free time. I had a lot more of it than I thought I did. So I started taking walks, listening to podcasts, reading books. I stopped drinking as much, I started sleeping better. And most of all, I had a lot less negative thoughts about myself than before. A lot of you could be suffering from negative self-talk that stems from disappointment from yourself. Maybe you guys need to unplug for a bit, especially if you feel like you’re a bit addicted to social media. We’ve all heard this before, but if you’re constantly looking at the perfectly curated lives of other people, you’ll think so many people are better than you and you can start to think about what went wrong with you that you’re not living a great life like them. To be honest, those constant comparisons and the constant bombardment of information are not healthy for your psyche and self-concept. You need to work out who you are and what you love on your own, outside of other people’s influence. Do you really like that artist, or do your favorite internet people like that artist so you feel you need to like them as well? Do you really like that style, or do you stop liking it once you stop seeing other people like it? You need to spend some time and energy on yourself, on your own, without other people around to influence you.

Some shadow work questions and prompts for you to explore:

What makes me happy, truly happy? It seems like an easy enough question, but it can be complex. Think about the last time you were really, truly, incandescently happy. Think about the last time you laughed so hard you cried. Think about the last time you were having such a good time that you didn’t want the day/night to ever end. What were you doing? Who were you with? How did you feel? Think about how to capture that feeling again. If it comes to you easily, then great! If not, explore why it doesn’t. Explore why you haven’t felt joy, why your heart hasn’t felt full, in a while and think on ways you could be blocking yourself from feeling those positive emotions. Reflect on how loving yourself can bring those feelings back.

When was the last time I stepped out of my comfort zone? If you have issues stepping out of your comfort zone, there could be some serious blockages around self-trust that you need to address. The last time you did, what were you doing? Who were you with? How did you feel? Think about small ways to step out of your comfort zone again. Make a dish with an ingredient you’re not sure about at home. Sing even if you think your voice sounds bad when you’re in your car alone. Take a new route home on a day when it doesn’t matter. If there is any fear within you that’s keeping you from experiencing anything new in order to keep you safe from any negative experiences, explore the root of that fear. Reflect on how loving yourself can combat that fear.

How do I wish I loved myself? An easier way to love yourself is to think: in an ideal world, what would self-love look like? What would self-care look like? How would I put my energy toward myself? Think about ideal physical self-care or beauty rituals, affirmations that resonate with you, lifestyles you’d like to live. Create moodboards or journal it all out. In a perfect world, how do I think I would act and feel if I had all the love in my heart for myself? Reflect on how to put some of those ideas into practice now.

Pile Two

For those of you who chose this pile, you need to change the way you see yourselves ASAP. I think a bunch of you are stuck seeing a past version of you, or an “unfinished” version of you (primarily, the you before you matured in some way). A lot of you have crippling self-doubt, anxiety, and low self-esteem. I’m getting like the image of a person who grew up fat and learned a lot of shame surrounding it, and then they lost the weight, but they still carried themselves as if they never changed. And to be clear, there is absolutely nothing inherently wrong with being in a bigger body no matter what anyone tells you, but we live in a society that’s hostile towards people who do live in bigger bodies, so the shame of that can follow a person their entire life. And it doesn’t even need to be that. I remember a story Eva Longoria (an actress) said about how she was always the ugly one growing up because her sisters were lighter-skinned and blonde, and it’s something that’s carried over into her adulthood. But the gag is, seeing pictures of her and her sisters, she was always the most beautiful one of them all! But because her self-concept and society told her that light = good and beautiful, her darker features made her feel ugly even as she grew more and more beautiful. If this is you guys, you need to change the foundations of how you see yourself, period. Whatever it is that’s causing you guys to feel less than or worse than, you need to fix it and fast. You guys are like Eva Longoria. You could be the best, most successful, most beautiful out of everyone you’re comparing yourself to, but because of a fundamental flaw in what you believe, you’re not seeing it. I’m also thinking of Princess Grace of Monaco. If I’m remembering the story correctly, she was not the “best” out of her family. She came from a family of athletes, and because she chose to become an actress, she was seen as less important and successful than the rest of her family, particularly her sister. Think about that: Hollywood actress, fashion icon, literal princess Grace Kelly being not as “great” as someone we know nothing about just because their concept of what constituted as great was different. Change the way you look at yourself now.

You guys need to free your mind from preexisting social constructs. I’m getting so much about beauty here. You guys could be my pile that’s extremely susceptible to getting cosmetic work done. And I don’t give medical advice on here to anyone, but from a social perspective on cosmetic surgery, a lot of people get work done due to society and not themselves. People of color lightening their eyes and permanently straightening their hair, petite women getting BBLs and breast augmentations, people everywhere getting filler in every single area above the neck as they can. These people see a look online and because that’s the beauty standard being pushed today, they think they’ll be happy once they get it. The truth is, if you’re not happy with yourself as you are, you won’t be happy with yourself after you change yourself. And you’ll keep changing and changing and changing and you’ll hate yourself just as much as you did before. I’m thinking of Lil Kim, the rapper. She was so beautiful, and people convinced her that she was ugly because she was dark-skinned. So she underwent so many surgeries, and now she looks unrecognizable from how she originally was. And the worst part is she admitted that none of the surgeries helped and she wish she hadn’t gotten them. Thinking about her versus Cardi B, another rapper who also got loads of cosmetic procedures. But she loved herself before them, and that self-love carries on after all of her procedures, and it’s very evident in the way she carries herself. I’m hearing a mashup of lines from different songs on Beyoncé’s Renaissance album. From Cozy: “Comfortable in my skin, cozy with who I am, I love myself, goddamn.” From Alien Superstar: “Bad bitch, I'm the bar.” From Heated…honestly that entire song, but especially: “Tip, tip, tip on hardwood floors. Ten, ten, ten across the board.” Honestly that entire album is full of manifestations that you may need to listen to. It’s funny how I’m getting so many examples of famous people to compare you guys to. It’s almost like confirmation that you guys are comparing yourselves to others too much. And your self-concept issues don’t have to be physical, even though I’m getting lots of physical examples. It could be that you think you’re not as smart because you’re not good in math or science even though you’re amazing at music or language. It could be that you think you’re too sensitive when in reality you’re just highly empathic and humane. It could be that you're remembering all the embarrassing and awkward things you did as a child and you're applying them to yourself now as an adult, forgetting that you were a literal child when you did the embarrassing/awkward thing. Whatever the case is, you need to fundamentally shift how you view yourself in order to love yourself more. It needs to come from within.

Some shadow work questions and prompts for you to explore:

What makes me feel free? Think about the last time you didn’t have an ideal or a standard to live up to. When was the last time you felt comfortable in exactly who you were, nothing more, nothing less? What were you doing? Who were you with? How did you feel? Think about how to capture that feeling again. Think about ways that you’re following the status quo and societal pressures without even realizing it. Think of the things you do that you maybe don’t exactly want to do and ask yourself why you’re doing it. From the clothes you buy to the makeup you wear to the people you talk to. Reflect on what would stay and what would go if you loved yourself enough to only keep what fulfilled you.

What would I tell my childhood self if I had the chance? This is a deep one, and I’d only recommend you dive into inner child healing if you’re in the mindset to do so. It is not for the weak of heart, and usually results in you realizing just how young you were when the world first failed you. This usually results in mourning a part of yourself that never should have died. But if you can, what would you tell Tiny You? Do you have any regrets for how life turned out? If you could tell them to avoid something or go towards something, what would that be? Visualize yourself giving your most vulnerable childhood self the loving embrace that maybe you never got when you needed it the most. Reflect on how loving the most vulnerable parts of yourself affects you now.

When was the first time I truly felt I loved myself? Think back to the first time you really, truly loved being yourself. What were you doing? Who were you with? How did you feel? How different do you feel today than you did then? What does loving yourself feel like? Don’t be afraid to admit if you’ve never had that feeling before. Reflect on what you believe has changed to make you no longer feel that way, or why you’ve never felt that way in the first place.

Pile Three

For those of you who chose this pile, I’m getting that you need to get your confidence up. Out of all three piles, your cards took the longest to come out and you had the most reversals. Your message also took a bit of a while to come through. It’s almost like a shy, sheepish energy, like those kinds of people who can’t take a compliment and who downplay everything they do. Whatever it is within you guys that make you feel like you’re not…worthy of acknowledgment, like you’re not worthy of praise needs to get tf ASAP. You’re definitely my fighters, my survivors, my people who get knocked down 9 times and get up 10. You guys make magic with a dollar and a day, are literal superheroes, and yet…you guys almost act like there’s nothing special about you, like just anyone can do what you guys accomplish. That’s fake news, babes. Not everyone overcomes adversity the way you guys do, so whenever you succeed at anything or accomplish anything, you need to own it. You need to unclench your jaw, relax your shoulders, unscrunch your brow, and learn to look people in the eye. You need to learn to have pride in your work and in your decisions, especially when they turn out well and people congratulate you on them. If you’re the first person in your family to graduate, be proud of that! Don’t just brush it off because “anyone can do that.” If anyone could do it, everyone would, and everyone doesn’t. There’s almost this feeling of self-deprecation beyond the norm that’s going on with y’all that I really don’t like and that you guys need to do away with now, because it’s blocking you from seeing exactly how amazing you are. You guys are wise, you’re capable, you’re unbeatable. You have so much to give and you give so much. And you think you’re nothing special and it’s actually really frustrating that you can’t see that.

And I get that it’s not entirely your fault. We live in a world of absolutes where someone’s always better and better and better until you get up to the best. If you accomplish something amazing today, someone will tell you about another person who accomplished that same thing faster and better than you did, making you feel like your accomplishment wasn't an accomplishment at all. Life can feel like a neverending competition that you’ll never win. But here’s a secret: you can only win or lose if you choose to play. You don’t have to play into these bumass games of who’s better and who’s worse. Pile Two had a bit of these comparison vibes, so go check that pile out if it called to you. But your accomplishments and your life in general is something to be proud of. You survived your past, you’re here, and you’re living. Those are things so many people can’t say so you should be proud of those things. You should be proud that, against all odds, you’re still here. I'm Still Here by John Rzenzik, check that song out. You need to find a way to feel more confident about the life you live, the roles you play, and the things you accomplish. When people compliment you, take the compliment! When people praise you, thank them! When people seek you out, don’t question them! I was getting a few messages surrounding commitment at the beginning and I didn’t understand why, but now I do. Your self-sabotaging could run so deep that you’re like me when I was in middle school. I felt like a bit of an ugly duckling in middle school, so when a boy who I’d liked for three years finally asked me out, I thought he was pranking me and got really mad. I turned him down in such a way that made it so that he never spoke to me again. Mutual friends came up to me afterward and let me know he was being sincere and had built up the courage to ask me for years. I did the same thing in high school when a boy asked me out to prom in a roundabout way. I thought he was joking because he was popular and I wasn’t, so I told him no. I later found out he was serious. You guys could sabotage relationships and be commitment-phobes because you don’t think there’s anyway people, good people, could like you or want you because there’s nothing special about you. It boils down to confidence. In order to love yourself more and give yourself the life you deserve, you need to get your confidence up.

Some shadow work questions and prompts for you to explore:

What am I thinking about right now? Think about what’s going through your mind when you want to downplay yourself or your accomplishments. What are you feeling? Think about what’s going through your mind when you believe you’re nothing special, when you believe you can’t be the one someone is asking after. Reflect on how what you’re thinking does not serve you in that moment.

What memories keep coming to the surface? What are you remembering? Does it have any relevance to what’s going on now? Our brains are a mass of connections dedicated to keeping us alive and well, but sometimes connections are made where they shouldn’t be. Those mistakes you keep reliving, the embarrassment you still feel as though it was fresh…why do you think they’re still there? What effect do you think they’re having on you? Reflect on how to let go of your past to make room for your present.

Is there a higher purpose to this? “This” can be anything: your life, a meeting, this moment. Is there more to life than you think there is? Could there be another reason for whatever is going on than first comes to mind? Is there really no other possible explanation than the one you have now? Are you, is this, all there really is? Really explore limitations that you’ve placed on different facets of your life experience, whether it’s your relationships, your accomplishments, or even yourself. Reflect on how loving yourself can expand your awareness of the human experience.

[sun-pluto]

[sun-pluto]

i can’t do this my soulmate would not be using dating apps

[sun-pluto]

Hello :) I was reading about Venusians and I kind of feel represented by this energy, maybe not strongly but I do. I don't have any Venus nakshatra in my primary placements, and my question is: if both of my ascendant nakshatra and rasi lords are in venusian nakshatras. Does it have an effect? could it be considered "dominant" or significant in some way? because I never get examples of this. In the community, they always talk about their Big 3, and in research, they give Big 3 examples, and they almost never consider those things as significant, which makes me feel like a wannabe Venusian 😬

Okay first of all , I think we need to ask ourselves why we cling to the idea of "dominance" so much. I've never thought of myself as anything dominant because I feel the effects of my whole chart in different areas/in different ways because that's how it's supposed to be?? (as each planet represents a different area of life?). I think this concept had its origins with Claire's astro beauty research where she associated the planet/nak that had the most physical influence on a person is their "dominant" placement but I think this way of thinking is inherently flawed because as interesting as I find Claire's astro beauty research to be, I don't actually think it holds ground because every person's appearance is a sum of many influences? Anybody can nitpick some common recurring features (esp when the women depicted are mostly just white women) and say xyz nak has caused it. Traditionally different body parts and features are associated with different planets and the astrology of appearance is very much real but it's not a hyper specific science the way Claire makes it seem. It's more like "mercury rules the forehead so many mercurials tend to have bigger foreheads" etc

Anywayyyys, you don't have to be anything "dominant" to relate to some nak or planet's impact. In fact if someone feels one placement more acutely than others, it's probably because of the astrological transits they're experiencing or because they're very spiritually underevolved. I do think a point arrives in one's spiritual journey where you feel completely detached from your chart or equally proximate/distant from every placement. It is the working of the ego that makes one over identify with one placement or another as a way to classify our experiences/personalities. By transcending the ego, we'll stop caring.

I think the whole chart affects an individual not just their big 3 and I take atmakaraka/amatyakaraka/lagna lord/1h & 2h placements/conjunction/debilitated/exalted planets etc into consideration as well.

Also check your d9 chart

You can relate to Venusian energies for so many different reasons (maybe check your dasha? see if you're experiencing Venus mahadasha or antardasha??)

I don't think it's healthy to obsess over dominance and I also don't think it's healthy to want to be any planet/nak?? That's literally the ego at play. Everybody wants to be Venusian but tbh Venus is as full of pros & cons as any other planet, it's not in any way shape or form "better". You can relate to something without labelling yourself as a Venusian? If I had Saturn ak and I related to that placement a lot, I wouldn't start calling myself a Saturnian. At the end of the day, it's all energies and let's not make this an American personality test type fixation

[sun-pluto]

hi. go buy esims for gaza. go preorder a kufiya from hirbawi. buy insulin for palestinian diabetics who need that help. if you live in the states use this to email your reps (this takes maybe 5 seconds to do). check out this massive list of resources where you can educate yourself in a meaningful and actionable way even if you don't have the financial means right now. from the river to the sea palestine will be free. 🇵🇸🇵🇸🇵🇸

[sun-pluto]

Reblogging would be a great help, but don’t feel pressured to

[sun-pluto]

i think we should remind musicians they can absolutely make up little stories for their songs btw. it doesn’t have to be about them at all. you can invent a guy and put him in situations to music. time honoured tradition in fact.

[sun-pluto]

Masayuki Nozaki

[sun-pluto]

im so fucking serious when i say that no one is crueler to visibly disabled people than girlies with blue wolfcuts and sharp eyeliner wearing hundred dollar sweaters from shein.

[sun-pluto]

ஓ๑♡๑ஓ

Things Will Work Out

it’s okay if something took you longer to achieve than you originally thought.

you are not behind in life. take your time and go at your own pace.

don’t compare yourself to others. you are on your own path. every path is different.

everything will work out in the end.

you will get to where you want to be soon

　　 ˚ . ✧　　 ˚

[sun-pluto]

The musical episode.

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[sun-pluto]

the female lead's opening/establishing scenes being her laying in a grave and coming across the aftermath of a mass death just reinforces my belief that cdramas are the best when they veer hard into the goth territory 10/10

[sun-pluto]

“I don’t mind being killed, but I don’t want them to touch me.”

— excerpt from Antigone by Jean Anouilh (trans. Lewis Galantiere)

[sun-pluto]

“In order to be free you simply have to be so, without asking permission of anybody. You have to have your own hypothesis about what you are called to do, and follow it, not giving in to circumstances or complying with them. But that sort of freedom demands powerful inner resources, a high degree of self-awareness, a consciousness of your responsibility to yourself and therefore to other people.”

Andrei Tarkovsky, from “The artist’s responsibility,” Sculpting in Time, trans. Kitty Hunter-Blair (University of Texas Press, 1987)

[sun-pluto]

saying “be safe” like a spell that’ll protect them

[sun-pluto]

Quiet Quitting is when you're not doing anything wrong but the vibes are off