sunniede

[sunniede]

Too Fat...

I’ve been trying to enter the military for over a year now, of course the reason why it’s taken so long is because of my weight. I need to lose 40 lbs 40! I’ve barely lost 10 in the year i have tried. I thought I was doing good, I thought my inches were going somewhere. It was all a lie. I’ stuck in this blob of a state. How the hell do people lose weight so easily. Of course my sister who had two babies back to back is in weight range and is gong in no problem. I dont know what to do anymore. I dont want to be this ugly fat blab for the rest of my life. 

[sunniede]

To the co-workers who keep saying im not eating enough

To the tumblr staff that keeps deleting my blog because I have an ED

[sunniede]

I need this badly so what the heck

idk if those “spells” work but………. somehow it’s working, is it a placebo? anyways 10 lbs weight loss spell!

like to charge

reblog to release

[sunniede]

“you’re not fat, you’re chubby.”

whats the fucking difference, bitch.

[sunniede]

my least favorite part of having an eating disorder is the constant arguing and bargaining in your head. racing thoughts all the fuckin time like, “okay I’ve had 75 calories today. I can have a banana and still be under 200. wait, 1200 is still considered restriction. how much would I lose this week with a daily deficit of 500 calories? I can do that. I’ll still lose weight. but not as much as if I fasted. no. just have nothing. you could lose 3.5 lbs. this week! just have nothing. people do it every day. just have a fucking banana. you won’t even be at maintenance. but what if it triggers a binge? think about your jawline. why don’t I just have everything I want and purge? what percentage can you get back up when you purge? hey google…” AND IT NEVER STOPS.

[sunniede]

Well, tomorrow is Halloween and I’m still fucking fat haha

Ihatemyself.

[sunniede]

Fucking calories

[sunniede]

being overweight with an ed

your parents promote it:

“ok fast as long as you can and i’ll buy you really low calorie foods and you can keep your intake to whatever you want.”

your significant other promotes it:

“wow babe you’re getting so small! that’s great!”

the people around you could care less if you eat 10 calories or 1000:

“oh! the healthier choice? proud of you!”

if you DO decide to eat regularly, you’ll be judged.

“are you sure? you’ve been doing so good lately..”

doctors won’t diagnose you.

nobody will suspect a thing.

and i think that’s the worst thing about it.

because they don’t care until you’re skinny.

and i’m just. not. skinny.

[sunniede]

weight loss app: u could be at ur ugw in literally a year!!

me, crying: so no skinny tomorrow?? *throws phone* *breaks skateboard*

[sunniede]

Pets

You know every post I see online or talk to someone, they are : omg those poor pets getting left behind because the owner had to move. Shame on the owner! Shame! Well you know. Some of us, no most of us do not want to leave our babies behind. Some of us look around the county and there are barely any places that accept pets with in our price range. So please do not shit on my all ready shitty feelings about having to leave my baby. The system doesn't work with us, it works against us.

[sunniede]

Allergies

Most of my day is contemplating if its worth it to shove my face in peanuts and die of anaphylaxis shock.

[sunniede]

In 3 weeks

I have 3 weeks to get down to 33% body fat! I have no idea how, it took a month to get from 53% to 46%! Like I already feel defeated. I want to be there, I want to lose the weight and get stronger. But the voice say other wise, they scream and claw at the inside if my head about how I'm worthless and can never amount to anything. How I will forever be this fat ugly girl. What can I do? How can I do it? I only have 3 weeks.

[sunniede]

if you’re reading this

a lump sum of money is on the way to you

[sunniede]

Holy fuck

I just noticed that valentines is in 3 more months so bish we better start restricting so you will get

Valentine cards

Reblog to lose 15 pounds by Valentine’s ❤❤

Ignore to gain 15 pounds by Valentine’s 😱😱

[sunniede]

Can't be anymore broke than I all ready am

this is the money dog, repost in the next 24 hours and money will come your way!!

[sunniede]

Weight

I know how much I weigh. It's a lot....A LOT! I know I look disgusting and like a blob ate a balloon. So when someone comes up to me and goes " oh stop, you're not that big" I want to freaking scream. Yes I am! Why are you accepting and ignoring the obvious. Like I'm not one of those people who just feel fat or have maybe 5 lbs to lose. I need to lose like 30 pounds to be healthy. If that's not fat I don't know what the heck is any more. I don't have the control to not eat. So I'm stuck wondering why everything I do besides starving myself is not working. I'm fat ladies and gentlemen. Accept this because I have.

[sunniede]

Terrible secret

He told why he's always depressed. In his teens he did something bad to his sister. I can see from his tears and the pain and fear of losing me that he truly regrets what he has done. I love his man and I will trust him. I haven't had any regrets in my life and I hope that keeping him around will not be my first. He is the first man to love me for who I am, to be truthful and honest with me. I pray that my judgement isn't flawed.