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i hope chris pratt’s mario impersonation offends so many italian americans that he gets put on a mob hit list
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tired of children's media propaganda broccoli is actually the best vegetable in the whole wide world she is my girlfriend and my wife and we should make broccoli the international vegetable of all time
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defending britney online isn't enough i need a gun to kill those mfs
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I fucking hate riddles they're always like "I take all my clothes off every night. When I go to bed, I am fully clothed. How is this possible??" And then the answers like "I put on my clothes again before I go to bed." Fuck off cunt
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Can you imagine what cathedrals would have been like if the medievals had access to neon lighting?
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the impulse to hide what I'm doing at my computer still sits so deep even tho I'm literally never looking at anything objectionable , the door will open and I'll hurry to close the page like oh fuck no one can know I'm looking at the Wikipedia page for the Balkans
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straight women will say “ugh i wish i was gay it would be so much easier to just date a girl” as if gay women in their twenties aren’t some of the most insane people out there
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