swaps55

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I'm probably going to sound ramble-y, apologies in advance, but Opus has rewired my brain chemistry and the limits of fanfiction and I need you to know.

I love mshenko. It's one of those ships that live in my brain rent free, and while it's canon execution has it's flaws, to see it play out on screen (the slow burn, their dynamic, the ease of it all) beyond the realm of fanon was amazing. Bioware, especially games like ME and DA2 (for example), give the illusion of character choice and development that is ultimately linear with little consequence. ME falls into this, ME2 less so, and ME3 provides maybe the most room (likely due to not planning a sequel with Shep). It's not all the time, and it's not always bad, but it's noticable if you play a lot of RPGs or wind up on your upteenth run. Sometimes the RP element falls flat, and thus the characters do, too, and you're thrown outta the loop by video game logic.

Your fic flips this entirely on its head. It's hard to explain, but the balance you've found between canon compliance and divergence is masterful. I read a scene and I'm struck by how *real* it all is, the way you've written the characters, their interactions, and how it fits into the world and the story so unobtrusively. It's the story of Mass Effect but with the characters given the first and final thought, especially Shepard, and it provides so much for exploration of what *is* canon by no longer making Shepard a vessel of player choice, but a complete character with his own goals and beliefs and development and it does *wonders* for the story of ME, everything hits so much harder because it's not "what will I do?" it's "what will Sam do?" We know him as a man and suddenly the stakes are so much higher. Maybe Opus isn't a novelization of the intricacies of the entire canon, but it's a novelization of Shepard, and of Kaidan, and I'm in awe of how you managed it.

The sheer numbers of this series astound me. The dedication, your passion, is so clear to see and so inspiring to a fellow fic writer. I too often get caught up in keeping my fics plot canon compliant that I don't realize just how much can be done in the margins of canon and still within the realm of possibility, and your work is a brilliant example of that. I applaud you, truly. To start such a project and share it with the world takes effort, drive, and you are infinitely inspirational. Opus is a masterwork, and a piece of fiction that will stick with me for a very long time. <3

Oh gosh, thank you. Mass Effect has been such a powerful experience for me because it’s impacted my life on so many levels in ways no other media has. My family, my friends, where I live, and even my day job, would not be what they are without it. So Opus, in many ways, is my attempt to put into words what it – and what Shepard – mean to me.* It’s a lot of feelings, lol.

Even though player choice often is an illusion, that illusion can be a really powerful one, and it’s part of what makes video games such a wonderful storytelling medium. You, as the player, participate in the narrative in ways you can’t with a traditional novel or a movie. Even if the story takes you to more or less the same place no matter what you do, the journey to get there feels uniquely yours. It’s exactly why I never want to see a Mass Effect movie or a TV show, because whatever linear, ‘canon’ story they decide to tell won’t look like the one that is so deeply important to me.

But that’s why fanfic is so special with games like this. It’s a multiverse where all of our experiences, all of our Shepards, all of our choices – canon compliant and canon breaking – get to co-exist. The Shepard Kaleidoscope is one of my favorite things about the Mass Effect fandom. Shepard is so many things to so many people.

Video games like this also pose some really fascinating narrative questions, because the necessary constraints that game mechanics pose on the story don’t apply in a traditional narrative. In Mass Effect, Shepard is the hero because they are the player character. Every piece of the narrative flows through them because the player is the center of the universe and the crux upon which all things turn. You don’t really think about why when you play, because the answer is self-evident – you are the player character. But a traditional written story doesn’t have that component.

So the thesis of Opus is more or less, “why Sam? Why is this guy the only person who can save the galaxy?” And Opus itself is the dissertation that makes my case. It is first and foremost a character study, so canon relationships and canon events have to be shaped and bent by him. People are messy and complicated and don't fit into binary systems like 'paragon' and 'renegade', and Sam is no exception.

It’s very important to me that Sam is the only one who can defeat the reapers not because he’s a huge badass, but because the choices he makes and the things he goes through along the way uniquely position him to do something no one else is capable of doing. I’m terribly excited about how it’s going to happen, because I will finally get the Mass Effect 3 ending I’ve wanted since March 2012 – but his ending wouldn’t work in the game because it’s designed around him.

You have no idea how incredible it is to me that Sam resonates with so many people. I really didn’t know if he would, in part because of that Shepard Kaleidoscope. We all have our own Shepards, and our own ideas of who Shepard is. Asking others to invest in a Shepard who very definitively colors outside the lines that the game drew for the character felt like a big ask. But the story I wanted to tell just wouldn’t work if I kept him to a more “default��� Shepard, because that wouldn’t answer my thesis statement.

Thank you for reading it. Thank you for loving it. And thank you SO much for telling me that it means something to you. Sometimes I feel a little insane about how devoted I am to this character and his relationship with Kaidan Alenko. Having people to yell about them with is very, very special. <3  

*ok, it’s also the culmination of more than a decade of spite and rage over the ending.

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A silly comic thing that got a bit out of hand. Completely out of canon. What if all the justicars do in their free time is pumping up!

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"I thought maybe I could say something. Tell you what a rare and wonderful thing you are to find amidst all this... darkness."

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This is the best one

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Please, please, please credit artists!

The Art of Salem.

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Pleasant inconvenience

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HEY TUMBLR WHEN I PUT A READMORE IN A SPECIFIC SPOT I NEED YOU TO LEAVE IT THERE, MKAY? NOT ARBITRARILY MOVE IT BELOW THE SPOILER.

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hi swaps! the most recent mezzo chapter got me thinking about what sam knows about alchera. how much of it does he remember, if anything? how much does he know about the details of the event---did someone sit him down and explain the crash and its aftermath or did he read a report? the thought of him, alone, reading a cold report detailing the destruction of his ship and life sounds awful :(((

This is a phenomenal question, and I am putting the answer under a cut for anyone who does not want to be spoiled, because it does come up, but it will be awhile.

He remembers nothing.

If you look back at points in Mezzo, you'll see that he asks others about it. He never volunteers his own memories, and deflects if he's asked. People assume he does remember, and he lets them.

The last thing he remembers is something I will keep to myself for now, so I can get yelled at about it later. But all he knows about what happened is what others have told him and what's in the report.

Keep on imagining him reading a cold report about the destruction of his ship and his life, because that's absolutely what happened.

He wasn't alone, though. EDI was there, even if he didn't realize it. <3

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been stewing on an analytical approach to fiction which I call "is this book afraid of me?" and in order to answer this question you determine how hard the book is trying to make sure you don't come after the writer on twitter

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Do you know what I would give to take a three month sabbatical and just work on Opus.

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swaps I just want to let you know the last line of ch13 made me gasp out loud. those three words don't mean anything to garrus or even to SAM, but they mean so much to the reader... to kaidan... I need to lie down....

You're welcome. :)

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rb to give it up for laura hall and linda taylor

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Reading your long fics, there's so much setup and payoff that has me thinking about how the story plays out for my Mass Effect universe. Which things bend, and which things break beyond repair, more tailored than the canon beats.

If you wanted a takeaway from your writing to be 'how to wound your characters in a way that makes the story really stick', it's working so well. It's so impressive how deftly you juggle the many characters while keeping the stakes and momentum charged.

Thank you!!!!! That means a lot to hear especially with this fic, given it is an absolute logistical nightmare. I work in constant fear that I am writing checks the story won't be able to cash. There are just too many characters in ME2 and too many siloed story lines that don't connect to a bigger throughline. It works fine in a video game, but in a linear format, ME2 is where narrative tension goes to die.

My approach to Mezzo has largely been:

Let game events that I don't have anything new or different to add fade into the background. (Like Freedom's progress, or Mordin's recruitment.)

Focus on characters who give me the most interesting perspectives on/relationships with Sam and determine what their primary drivers are. (For example, EDI and Jack.)

Find ways to connect those drivers to Sam's character regression/progression and somehow make a satisfying character arc for both. (Neither EDI nor Sam have a voice when it comes to their bodily autonomy and role with Cerberus; Jack and Sam both need to look outside themselves and their anger to heal).

Give characters reasons to talk to each other outside of Sam, for the love of god. (Miranda and Mordin, for instance.)

Set up all the weird shit I'm gonna do with ME3. [eyebrow wiggle]

Some of my beloved ME2 characters are going to get neglected in Mezzo because there just isn't room to do them the full justice they deserve, and some are going to play smaller roles because I just do not want to write a 300k story.

But it has been a tremendous amount of fun digging into characters like EDI, Jack, Garrus, Liara, Jacob, and Miranda in ways I haven't before. Mordin as a character already has a perfect arc in the game, but the biotic mystery I am setting up has been a really excellent way to involve one of my favorite characters of all time in a way that feels really satisfying.

Basically, the payoff for me personally while writing Mezzo has been extremely high and very rewarding, but clawing my way to finding those payoffs has already aged me ten years, lol. If it reads like it's deft and easy, that's great because it means the hard work has been worth it.

(this is so much more than you wanted to know, sorry. XD)