tacharie
tacharie
🍒
424 posts
Cherry- She/her - 18Hallo :3
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tacharie · 2 days ago
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another video of miura ayme performing at my local mall because he's so cool
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tacharie · 4 days ago
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happy pride month
Click for better quality
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tacharie · 4 days ago
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"please I don't want to be alone again..."
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tacharie · 4 days ago
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tacharie · 4 days ago
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every nanami headcannons post i see is like “nanami is a provider, nanami is a breadwinner...”
ARE YOU KIDDING. NANAMI NEEDS A WOMAN WHO MAKES BAG SO HE CAN QUIT HIS JOB AND BE A HOUSEHUSBAND.
this man HATES work and you’re telling me that he wants to be the sole provider? PLEASE be real for a second. nanami was built for domesticity. he needs a girl who can buy a cute little house by the sea where all he has to worry about is reading his books and loving his woman.
like this man will make sure you come home every night to a clean house and a warm dinner and then eat ur pussy like a champ. his girl takes care of him so he’s gonna take care of her and he’s gonna take care of her good.
service dom to end all service doms. you want dick after a long day of work? he’s gonna make you see stars and then take care of you like a princess. you want to be slapped around? sure. he’ll tie you up and use you, but best believe your cumming at least 4 times. you want it soft and gentle? that’s what you’ll get. anything for his hard working baby.
and once you're nice and worn out and sleeping comfortably in bed, he's going to the kitchen to make ur lunch for tomorrow. complete with a little note on the napkin reminding you how much he loves you.
nanami deserves a life as a malewife. keep that man barefoot and in the kitchen.
this is the correct opinion and i will not be arguing my point any further at this time. thank you for listening.
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tacharie · 4 days ago
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Yandere Prison Warden
After getting thrown into jail for a crime you refuse to talk about, one of the wardens takes a keen interest in your past. Tags: Male Yandere x Fem Reader, blood, violence, mentions of child abuse, lowkey kind of sweet, 10k words
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Being in jail is no fun. Being in a maximum security prison after being found guilty of homicide? Somehow even less fun.
You've tried to make the best of it. Got some posters to put up in your cell, started a book club, took up macramé. But you can't really paint a veneer of normalcy over incarceration.
It's violent, it's dirty, and most inmates tend to avoid you. And the thought of at least thirty more years of the same routine, day in and day out? Well, that's plain depressing.
Still, some days are worse than others. Today seemed like it was going to be a good day. The cafeteria food was actually hot, an acquaintance shared some gum with you, you managed to get a new book from the library. Things were, if not great, at least bearable.
Until the tour.
The wardens - also called Corrections Officers, COs, screws, or rotten, motherless bastards - were almost always training new recruits. The prison system had an unsurprisingly high turnover, which meant an almost constant stream of new faces. With time, you'd learnt to ignore the tours and walk-throughs. With one exception.
Slammer.
He was a senior CO who seemed to almost always turn your cell into the final stop on his grand introductory tour of the glorious prison system. Maybe you were just nice to look at or maybe he had a chip on his shoulder. Either way, things almost always ended with you being gawked at.
Like right now.
The 'tour group' was clustered outside your cell. Slammer was in the lead, his baton out and his little piggy eyes gleaming.
The trainees were in their new minted uniforms. Most of them uncomfortable and tugging at the scratchy, starched collars. You could have told them not to bother. That it was better for them to at least pretend they were comfortable. COs weren't your friends - every single prisoner in here would see that lack of confidence, that slight sense of unease. And they would pounce on it the first chance they got.
You hated being looked at like a zoo animal. And you especially hated the way Slammer showed you off to them like you some prize piece in his menagerie. Fellonus Homicidus perhaps.
You hated feeling their eyes on you. But you weren't going to make the mistake of showing them that. The less the COs knew about you, the better. It was like rule number three of incarceration. (Rule one being ‘never trust a warden’ and rule two being ‘don't fight the jacked inmate with prison tattoos.' Obviously).
You didn't bother to get up from your bunk to greet them. You stayed just as you had all afternoon - one arm behind your head and one leg hanging off the bed.
You pretended to keep reading your beat up paperback.
"This one is especially dangerous. Stabbed her neighbour forty eight times before the cops could get her off," Slammer told them.
"Forty six," you corrected without looking away from your book. "Coroner said it was forty six. Allegedly."
You could feel their eyes on you again.
"Right," Slammer drawled, "Because those last two stabs made all the difference."
You didn't bother to answer him.
"She really did that?" One of the trainees, a lanky guy with too large ears, asked. "She looks harmless."
You were almost offended at that. You flicked your eyes over them. They were mostly men, and most of them were looking at you in that hungry, contemplative way you knew so well. Wondering how much they could get away with once they were full fledged COs.
It should have bothered you. It didn't. Horny COs were just a part and parcel of life here. If you were smart, you could wring all sorts of goodies out of them before their supervisors caught on.
"Listen to me son. Every single prisoner in here is dangerous. They wouldn't be locked up if they were like you and me. They don’t feel guilt, not even when they steal from their poor old momma."
"You wound me, Slammer." You turned the page with a flick of your thumb. "I loved my mama. Only stole from her once or twice."
You didn't have much hope of them noticing your sarcasm. COs weren't the brightest bunch.
Slammer ignored you. "Don't ever say they're harmless. They sure as hell ain't. Two weeks here and you'll know exactly what I mean."
You could tell they didn't believe him. In the popular imagination, a women's prison was nothing like the men's. Women weren't dangerous. The trainees probably assumed you spent all day knitting scarves and talking about the lovely husband and kids you were oh so keen to get back to.
They would lose that notion pretty damn fast.
"Are you supposed to tell us the prisoners' charges?" A man's voice, neutral and respectful, but you thought you could hear a hint of reproach in his tone.
You looked back at the group and you were amazed that you didn't notice him earlier. He stood perfectly still, hands clasped behind his back like he was at parade rest. Unlike the others, he had the quiet confidence of someone who knew their job and knew it well.
His blond hair was slicked back and his uniform sat on him in a way that was a lot more natural than any of the others trainees. Ex-military or police, if you had to guess. Not that unusual. Corrections wasn't such a huge leap from those fields.
You sat up and answered him before Slammer could get a chance.
"He's not. Inmate information is confidential. But Slammer here doesn't always listen to the rules."
You shot the head CO a condescending smile. "He's a reaaal rebel."
Slammer scoffed. "The new officers have a right to know exactly how dangerous you are."
You put a hand to your chest, all faux innocence. "Little old me? Slammer, I'm a saint! A nun! I've been to chapel three times this week."
"Yeah. To sell cigarettes and buy booze."
"Just as the good Lord intended."
Slammer didn't find you funny. You could tell from the fact that a) he wasn't laughing and b) he was grinding his teeth like he was a beaver about to dig into a particularly scrumptious tree.
"Fact is, prisoners like her are the worst of the bunch. You think they're harmless, but the second you turn your back, they'll shiv you and run off with your tazer."
You grinned at the trainees as winningly as you could.
"Only did that once by the way. And the guy had it coming, swear on my mama."
Most of them were shifting around uncomfortably. Hearing Slammer keep banging on about your crimes was finally enough to get it through to them. The prisoners are not nice.
You'd assume that was obvious, but incarceration taught you that however slow you thought the wardens were, they could always get dumber.
The only one who didn't seem bothered was the blonde. He was looking at you like you were nothing more or less than a piece of furniture. You got the sense that he was analysing you, looking past your fake smile and even faker bravado.
You also got the feeling that he wasn't impressed with what he saw.
You flopped back down on your bunk and tried not to let it bother you. One more person thinking you were a delinquent. What difference did it make?
He was the last to leave. His eyes did one final scan of your cell before they landed on your paperback. He raised a brow.
"The Green Mile? Isn't that a bit depressing?"
You shrugged, uncomfortable but not entirely sure why.
"I like to think of it as aspirational."
"And why's that?"
"The wardens aren't all assholes."
That earned you a flicker of a smile before he turned on his heel and disappeared.
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You forgot all about him after a week. To be fair, there were other things to occupy you. A fist fight on D Block that you somehow got dragged into. Drama in the book club. A warden getting caught with his pants down. Standard prison fare.
It was a Tuesday when you saw him again, in the middle of the cafeteria. You only had a split second to recognise him before he was dousing you in pepper spray and sweeping your legs out from under you.
That was misleading maybe. He wasn't totally unjustified in greeting you like that. You were technically in the middle of beating a CO with a lunch tray.
(He deserved it, but that's not exactly a good excuse when his nose is gushing blood all over the table).
You were still coughing on pepper spray when he hauled you to solitary, your eyes and throat burning.
"Glad...to see you got...the job Blondie," you managed to wheeze.
He sent you stumbling into the cell with a practiced push.
"Yep," he said simply, "They hired me on the spot."
Your shoulder was still a painful mess when he slammed and locked the door, leaving you in the half dark to wash the stinging out of your eyes.
You rubbed at your aching joints. "I can see why."
Pepper spray was considered the least lethal way to subdue a prisoner. Easier than a taser, less brutal than the baton. But despite its shining reputation, it was your least favourite tool in a CO’s belt. A taser was at least quick. The baton left a bruise but the pain didn't linger.
Pepper spray on the other hand? It left your eyes and throat and nose irritated for days.
You were still trying to rinse it out of your mouth when he returned, boots heavy on the linoleum and his keys rattling.
You turned to him with your white prison issued tank practically soaked. To most other guards, that would be an invitation to gawk. Not him though. His eyes never dipped below your chin.
"Sit down. I've got some cold cloths for the swelling."
You sat, more confused than anything else.
"That's not standard regulation Blondie. Usually, they just let us suffer through it."
He tossed you the cloths, still icy from a quick minute in the freezer. You pressed them to your face gratefully.
"It is standard regulation. Treating pepper spray once the prisoner is subdued."
You scoffed. "Why am I not surprised that no one ever told us that?"
He stayed quiet and you peaked at him over the edge of the fabric. He was a lot leaner than you realised, his sleeves rolled to his elbows, his forearms toned with muscle.
And covered in tattoos. Damn, he had some sick tats.
You cleared your throat, not exactly sure why he bothered to do this for you.
"Thank you. It sucks to deal with. Makes everything taste awful. For days."
He raised a brow.
"I just dragged you to solitary and your main worry is that the food won't taste good?"
"The food never tastes good. This is more so a matter of bloody awful becoming hellish awful."
"It can't be that bad."
"Get back to me after you've spent five years chomping down on lukewarm hash browns and soggy peas."
"You've been in here five years already?"
You sighed, pressed the cloth against your brows so you didn't have to look at him.
"Yep. And I've still got another thirty to go."
"Why?"
That got an unexpected laugh from you.
"Didn't you hear Slammer? Homicide. Found guilty on all charges."
"Did you do it?"
"Allegedly."
What was his angle? Was this some new, interactive approach to corrections? Getting friendly with the inmates so they were less likely to riot?
"Didn't they teach you not to ask those sorts of questions?" you asked. "Not really something people in here like to talk about."
You saw that little flicker of a smile again.
"They did. But I get the feeling you don't mind it as much."
He was right. You didn't mind. At least, not with him. He had a kind of quiet confidence that, surprisingly, made you feel comfortable.
"Why did you want to work in a prison? Or more accurately, what the hell went wrong that you ended up here?"
"You think it's such a bad job?"
"I'd never do it and I live here."
He leaned against the cell wall, hands on his belt. There it was again. A veteran's stance, weapons in easy reach in case you tried something.
"It's a boring story."
"I've got nothing but time."
That earned you another raised brow.
"As we've established."
What's this? A CO actually cracking a joke? You never thought you'd see the day.
"And anyway, we're not here to talk about me. I'm here to find out why you attacked my fellow officer."
Ah, so that was why he was playing nice.
"I didn't like his face."
He narrowed his eyes and pushed himself off the wall. "Disappointing. I thought you'd have a better reason than that."
You didn't like his tone, or the way it made you feel. Ashamed. Like you'd failed his test, even though you didn't know you were supposed to be studying.
He paused at the door, like something occurred to him.
"What's her name? The girl he was picking on?”
You raised you head. "What?"
"The guard you attacked. He was causing trouble, wasn't he?"
How did he know? Did he see it? Oh God, was Ruby going to get into shit because of you?
"Listen, she had nothing to do with it. She had no idea what I was going to do. It was all me."
He shrugged. "How am I supposed to believe that's true if I don't know the full story?"
You bit your lip. You didn't like saying too much to the COs. And your instinct was telling you this one would be able to read a lot deeper than the rest.
"Guess I'll just have to ask her then."
"No!" You dug your hands into your sheets to stop yourself from bolting to your feet.
"No, Ruby has nothing to do with it I swear. She’s almost sixty. She gets enough shit as it is. Just leave her alone."
You swallowed. "Please."
He was looking at you again, much sharper this time.
"Explain."
Your grip on the sheets tightened until your knuckles were pale. Did you really have to talk about this shit out loud?
"Ruby is..." you started. "She's different. Older than most of us, keeps to herself. She's not...all there, if you know what I mean."
He turned to face you and settled back against the wall. "Go on."
"Most of the inmates don't bother her. Why would we? She's just a little old lady. Not harmless, no ones really harmless, but about as close to it as you can get. But some of the COs..."
His lips thinned. "They have a nasty streak."
"You can call it that. Usually it's just calling her names. But sometimes some of them get it into their heads that what she really needs is a hard knock. Rattle those screws around enough and maybe they'll fall back into place."
"Is that what happened today?"
You sighed, looked down at your hands and the blood dried in the crevices of your nails.
"Yep. CO was all in her face, being nasty. Grabbing her wrist. Taunting her. And she... she just stood there and took it. Old enough to be the his grandmother and he didn't care."
You closed your eyes.
 What else were you supposed to do?
He'd been at it for five minutes when you stood up with your lunch tray. By then you'd had enough. No one else was going to do anything, so it was going to be you.
The lunch trays were a hard plastic, meant to keep from breaking on impact. You'd left your half eaten bowl of chow on the table and walked up behind him, your heart beating steady and calm. Some part of you had already decided the consequences were worth it.
Some of the inmates were looking at you and every single one of them knew exactly what you intended. But none of 'em said a word.
You could still feel the smack of your tray against his head. The way he stumbled forward with the momentum.
You'd caught him by surprise and you weren't going to let him get over it. You swung the tray at his face, as hard as you could. You could feel his nose breaking. He was on his knees by then. And maybe you'd have let him up, might have ended things there.
But then you saw Ruby's wrist. A frail thing, with the warden's finger marks standing out a livid red.
"I see."
You opened your eyes. He was still watching you, his face unreadable.
You shrugged and tried to smile.
"Today was practically hum drum by our normal standards."
"How exciting," he deadpanned.
"Just wait 'til Christmas time. It gets positively festive."
He snorted and started for the door again.
"You're aren't such a hard ass after all, are you? Saving little old ladies in your spare time," he said.
"Just think how safe senior citizens will be when they let me back out."
It was only for a few seconds, but you liked it when he smiled. It softened that tough guy demeanour just enough to make you wonder about the man underneath.
When he was gone, you laid down with the cloth still pressed against your cheek. Who'd have thought it. A CO who you didn't want to punch in the teeth.
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The CO you beat didn't come back to work for two weeks, and when he did, you heard that he asked for a transfer to a different block.
Ruby made you a macaroni necklace and said something about alien warships picking you out of everyone else. You figured that was her way of saying thank you.  
And maybe the most notable thing of all: Blondie was assigned to your cell block. Surprising. Yours wasn't the worst part of the prison, but you weren't a bunch of saints either. Rookies wouldn't even be considered until they'd had at least a year's experience.
It was yet another thing pointing to his past. Something, somewhere, had given him enough experience to slip ahead on the promotion queue.
You didn't much mind it. Hell, you'd almost say it was enjoyable. He wasn't rude, he didn't pick favourites and he was keen eyed enough to catch a lot of the under table business that inmates engaged in.
You didn't go out of your way to talk to him - getting too cosy with a CO wasn't a good look - but you made it a point to greet him whenever you could.
Well, you called it greeting. Most other folk saw it as a smirk and a sing song "Hey there Blondie!"
He must have had some sort of interest in you too. You'd look up from your lunch and see him watching you, head tilted just a little. Like he was trying to puzzle you out. You took to winking at him whenever you caught him.
It would usually be enough to make him look away, but never for long. His eyes would always find you again.
You should have been annoyed at it, or unnerved. But honestly, the way he looked at you was borderline sweet compared to the other COs. You'd occasionally catch some of them watching you too. Usually with their hands on their belts.
There wasn't much to do in prison besides read, sleep and exercise. But around the third week after his arrival, you started getting letters.
Not totally uncommon. Plenty of folk wrote to prisoners. But to you? That was a different story. You put the letters you received into two categories: perverts and the pervertedly curious.
The perverts were exactly what you'd expect. People who thought your mugshot was the hottest thing since Megan Fox taking a swim. Their letters were particularly uncomfortable to read. And often sticky. You never wrote back.
The pervertedly curious were a whole ‘nother class. They probably ran across your case on a true crime podcast or on a documentary. And their first thought at hearing the story was to wonder exactly what it felt like. They'd write and ask you what was going through your mind. What did the knife feel like sinking into his flesh? What did the blood smell like?
A fun bunch of freaks. You'd write back sometimes, more for your own amusement than anything else. Your answers were never even remotely true. I was mostly thinking about how late my taxes were and what a bastard it would be clean up. Stabbing him felt like cutting a steak except more scream-y. The blood smelt like a stack of pennies on a warm summer day, but mostly it just smelt like blood.
You'd always end your sentences with your trademark allegedly.
These new letters were nothing like those at all. The paper was crisp and clean and most importantly, not sticky. The folded lines were sharp, like the writer pressed them down with their thumb nail.
The writer didn't ask about the murder. They didn't ask about your bra size. They were almost...sweet.
You must be lonely in prison. You must get bored. I hope you're safe.
You read it again and again before you wrote a reply. Silly really. They seemed much too nice to be writing to someone like you. Maybe someone trying to do a good deed.
You should scare them off. Writing to a prisoner is sweet and all, but most folk in here would use it as just another way to wring someone dry. You were no different. Your anonymous pen pal would be better off working at the animal shelter if they wanted to help a stray.
I've got a whole host of buddies. We discuss the best ways to get blood out of our socks and pillow cases. I'm not bored at all. We've got a badminton league. Obviously the best way to spend federal cash. I'm as safe as a lamb in the hay. Only got stabbed twice last week.
There. That would get rid of them.
You mailed it out on cheap exam pad paper with a stamp you lifted off your neighbour. You didn't expect a reply.
When the mail got delivered the next week, you were more than a little surprised to find a new letter waiting for you.
The same crisp paper, the same neat, slanting hand.
You can't scare me off. I know you're only prickly and sarcastic because deep down you're scared. Scared a lot. Scared all the time.
I looked you up. You were barely out of high-school when it happened. Well behaved, normal family, no record of misdemeanours. Prison must have been an awful adjustment.
You had to put the letter down and take a deep breath. The kid clocked you. Less than two letters in and they'd read you better than anyone had in years. Better than anyone ever had maybe.
What were those first few years like, I wonder. How did you survive? Please write me back. I like checking in on you.
You considered not replying. What were they hoping to achieve, getting all familiar with a killer?
The letter sat on your shelf for half a week before you gave in and wrote a reply.
I survived by being mean and cruel and evil. Stop writing me kid. I'll bite your head off and drink your blood.
The next letter came almost instantly. If anything, the writer seemed amused more than anything else.
Scary. Did they put you in for homicide or suspected vampirism? You want to get rid of me, but I'm not going anywhere. You don't have to reply, but I know you must need a friend. They aren't easy to come by behind bars. Any alliances you form will always have the expectation of reciprocation. It must be exhausting.
Did I tell you I bought a new car last week? A Camaro. I know. How stereotypical of a Marine to buy a car like that, right? But it's gorgeous. I'd like to take you for a drive someday. Nothing but the open road. I think you'll like that.
You didn't even wait a full day before you wrote back. Because they were right. You really did need a friend. Someone to just shoot the breeze with, without any subtext of a favour being repaid later on.
You didn't know anything about your mysterious pen pal. Not their age or their gender or even the colour of their eyes. They signed all their letters with a simple from B.
They mostly asked you questions. Not obtrusive or gross ones either. They wanted to know which foods you missed the most, which tv series and movies you wanted to catch up on, which actors you thought were getting Grammys this year.
When Grammy and Oscar season rolled around, you choked out a fellow inmate to get the TV remote. You left them sitting up on the couch, passed out and looking like they were just asleep. Blondie almost caught you. He walked past the door and paused to stare at your victim.
You gave him your most charming grin.
"She said the opening ceremony was too long and to wake her up when the red carpet is over," you explained.
He scoffed and moved on.
When you wrote your next letter, you packed it full of award show details.
B wrote to you for the better part of a year. But you only learnt a handful of things about them. They were in the Marines, they now worked some kind of federal job, they had tattoos, they liked Nicole Richie, and they hated fried chicken. Like really hated it. With a passion.
I promise to never cook you fried chicken, you wrote, only fried calamari, fried onion rings, fried mushrooms, fried liver, fried green beans, fried -
Can you even cook? they wrote back. Or are you just running your mouth?
For a while, you were happy. They'd occasionally send you new books in the mail, burnt CDs to listen to on your busted radio, packets of sweets.
Prison was hell, but it was a structured, expected sort of hell. You could deal with it.
But then she arrived.
You didn't bother to learn her name. She was tall and lean, green eyes like pond scum, and teeth chipped from fighting. You didn't like her from the first, but you had no reason to quarrel and so avoided her as much as you could.
Blondie didn't like her much either, and that's where the trouble started.
She'd deliberately bump into Blondie whenever she could. Hard enough that you could almost feel the impact.
"Oops... Didn't see you there."
If it was anyone else, they'd probably get thrown in solitary. But Blondie was a stickler for the rules. He'd brush his uniform off like just touching an inmate was enough to cause a plague. And then he'd settle his blue eyes on her, cool and detached.
"Watch where you're going next time."
That was how it went on. Weeks of passive aggression, slowly getting more and more physical.
You didn't want to intervene. Blondie could protect himself. Still, you kept your eye on him as much as you could.
There was another thing about the new girl you didn't like.
She had a way with people.
Could convince even the most stubborn inmate to do something, even if it was against their own best interest.
She got an inmate who was almost out on probation to attack and almost blind a CO. She got innocent old Ruby to start selling cigarettes. She almost got you to pick a fight with someone for damn near no reason at all.
She was dangerous, in a way no one before her had been. You could feel it in the harsh whispers after lights out. Got to make those dirty screws pay. Fucking COs have had it too good for too long. Who the fuck do they think they are anyway?
A riot was brewing. You started staying in your cell a lot more. Managed to pull some metal out of your mattress and spent every night sharpening it to a point.
Some of the COs were smart enough to notice the tension and your outside time got shortened to half an hour, lunch got pulled back to fifteen minutes. Their solution was to keep you locked in your cells for as much of the day as possible.
Not a good move.
Prisoners with no distractions tend to amuse themselves by planning all sorts of nasty things. How to grab a CO from behind and get their keys before anyone noticed. How to choke out the one bastard who kept throwing them in solitary. How to pay back all those times a CO groped them in the middle of a search.
You could feel it heightening to a point. Could feel it in the dirty, oily stickiness of the air.
When Blondie came past on patrol, you stopped him. You'd been hoping to catch him for a few days and you weren't going to miss your chance.
"Yes?"
Those blue eyes were staring straight through you, cool as a winter without a radiator.
You remembered the pepper spray, the cool cloth pressed against your burning skin.
"Listen, I think you should call in sick for the next week."
Oh no, it came out sounding like a threat.
You cleared your throat, tried to smile.
"I owe you one, okay? So just trust me on this and don't show up for a while."
He narrowed his eyes.
"There's going to be a riot,” he said.
"Seems like it."
"When?"
"I don't know. It's not exactly a scheduled thing. But it's going to be bad."
He looked away from you, scanning the long row of cells across from you. You could hear the ambient shuffling and coughing and laughing of a hundred people living together.
"Can it be stopped?"
You sighed. You'd seen it play out a few times already. Wardens had all sorts of ways to handle riots, but once the fever was brewing, it was near impossible to break. It was in the atmosphere, in the tense glances between prisoners. It was bigger than all of you.
He must have seen the answer in your face.
He shook his head, stubborn to the last.
"I've got a job to do. If I got scared every time the prisoners got rowdy I'd be out of work real quick."
You sighed and pulled away from the bars.
"Your funeral Blondie."
You really hoped it wouldn't be.
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The thing that started the riot was so small that on a normal day you'd call it borderline routine.
A CO was watching the cafeteria line, hustling people along when they paused longer than he liked. When he came to one of the girls a few spots ahead of you, he got impatient and shoved her forward. Not hard. Barely enough to make her stumble.
You cringed. For a second or two, you imagined you could feel it on your skin. A static crackling like lightning about to strike.
She punched the CO in the throat.
He stumbled backwards, holding his neck and gasping.
Other prisoners  were already moving forward. Three of them grabbed his arms and bunch of the others ripped off his gear. Taser and baton and pepper spray now in the hands of a pissed and petty prison populace.
The other officers were already coming forward, batons out. Usually that would be enough to break things up, but they had just about everyone against them. Numbers always won.
 The veneer cracked and the riot finally started. It took less than a minute.
The yelling was enough to make your head throb. Bouncing off the cafeteria walls and ringing ringing ringing in your ears.
You ducked out of the way as much as possible, always on your guard. Riots weren't just dangerous for the wardens. Inmates saw them as a way to settle old scores without ending up in solitary or back in court. And lord knew,  you'd accumulated a hell of a lot of grudges over the years.
A prisoner rushed you. She was clutching a shiv made out of a ballpoint pen and a piece of wire coat hanger.
You dodged, sticking your foot between her legs and making her stumble. Your adrenaline was pumping, your vision dark at the corners.
You grabbed her hair before she could recover, and slammed her head against the edge of a metal cafeteria table.
She dropped like a rock.
You stepped away before any of her friends noticed you, your heart so far up your throat you could almost taste it.
That's when you saw her. That green eyed bitch, slipping out a side door with two of her cronies behind her.
You could feel your neck prickling.
There was only one score she had to settle and you knew exactly who it was aimed at.
You followed as quickly as you could. The backup had arrived and two tear gas canisters were belching thick white smoke into the room.
Despite your best efforts, by the time you made it out your eyes were stinging and she was long gone.
You swore and sprinted down the corridor, thinking fast.
If she managed to corner Blondie, she’d want to take her time with him. That's how scores were settled when you had a mean streak. Slow. Painful.
That meant she’d want privacy. Somewhere the riot officers wouldn't immediately find her when things calmed down.
You grabbed the corner of a wall and used it to shoot down the main hall, prison issued sneakers pounding the linoleum.
The showers. That's exactly where you'd go if you were her.
She didn't have time to block the doors. You banged through them shoulder first, the same way a cop would. The room was still thick with steam from earlier and Blondie's blood was running in thin streams toward the drain.
"The fuck is wrong with you?" she barked.
Green eyes, the one who instigated this whole mess.
She was standing with her sleeves rolled up and a razor blade between her fingers. The small, rectangular kind that goes in a straight razor.
Her two cronies were holding Blondie by the arms, stretching him out like he was on a cross.
Blondie clearly hadn't made it easy for them. Green eyes had a nasty bruise blooming on her cheek and both her cronies were sporting ugly nose bleeds. His baton was laying abandoned on the shower floor, rolled up against a bench.
Even a man as strong and well trained as he was couldn't go up against three armed felons and win.
You must have been just in time. The worst they'd done to him was cut his cheek, all the way from his temple to the bridge of his nose. It was bleeding bad, but didn't look too deep.
You straightened up and smiled at them, big and broad like you'd never had a better reunion.
"Having some fun without inviting me?"
Green eyes scoffed. "Why do you care? This shit is personal. Find something else to do."
You tilted your head, still smiling.
"You're right. It is personal. As in I owe Blondie over there a personal favour. As in I don't want you fucking with what's mine."
Blondie was watching you with those sharp eyes. If he took issue with being called yours, he didn't show it.
"Let him go." You didn't scream. You didn't demand. You simply said it. That's what made them nervous.
"Listen bitch - I don't care that everyone is scared of you. What you did on the outside doesn't matter one fucking bit."
You kept smiling, but your fingers were buzzing. The same why they had the night you stabbed a man forty six times.
You flicked your wrist and the shiv fell into your palm.
It was as long as your hand and sharpened into a wickedly pointed tip. It could slide between someone's ribs and kill them in less than five heart beats.
"They aren't scared of me because of what I did outside."
The two cronies were looking at each all worried-like. You vaguely recognised them, but it was clear that they recognised you no problem.
The boss turned to face you fully, light and easy on her toes like a boxer.
"You really gonna make a big deal over a fucking screw? A CO?"
"Since he's the only CO I've met who isn't a total piece of shit, I've got a vested interest in keeping him around."
She rolled his shoulders like a fighter would. You bit back a sigh. This was going to really hurt.
She didn't come at you right away. She ran her eyes over your body - your posture, your build, everything that might give you an advantage.
Then she charged.
Fast, even on the still slippery tiles. There wasn't enough time to duck or dodge.
You blocked her first punch with your arms, her fist smacking against your skin and spiking a sharp pain all the way down to your bones.
You stepped backward and kicked at her knee, but she saw it coming and turned her leg at the last second, took it on her thigh instead.
She’d dropped the razor blade - without a handle it was just as dangerous to her as it was to you - which meant she had full use of her fists.
She kept pummelling at you, catching you on the ribs and then on the sternum. You slammed back against the lockers, winded.
She pushed her advantage, going straight for your throat. You dropped down at the last second and her fist slammed full force into the metal.
She screamed and then screamed again as you slammed your shiv into her thigh.
You grabbed her throat and shoved her away from you, breathing hard.
She was clutching her thigh with one hand, blood welling up between her fingers. Dark red, but not enough to be fatal. You hadn't hit any arteries.
You slammed the heel of your hand into her nose, aiming upwards. You felt cartridge crunching.
She screamed again and scrambled away as quickly as she could with her injured leg.
Blood was running into her mouth, and when she snarled at you, her teeth were red.
You smiled again, as cheerful as a choir girl.
"Had enough?"
She spat blood at your feet.
You waited, half your attention on the other two. They hadn't yet moved to help her. You weren't sure if it was out of fear of letting Blondie go, or just a strong self preservation instinct.
Green eyes finally gave in. Or more accurately, her leg did. She buckled and fell, knees smacking hard on the tile. You winced.
She looked pale, in the about to pass out sort of way.
You sighed and jerked your head at her.
"Get her to the second floor nurses office. Wrap something around her leg. Tight. She’ll live but it's going to hurt a whole lot more if you aren't quick about it."
The other two were looking between you and her, eyes wide.
You wiped the back of your hand across your mouth, still holding the bloody shiv.
That seemed to decide them. They let go of Blondie all at once and grabbed their boss under the arms. Between the two of them, they were able to drag her out.
She left a trail of bright red behind.
When they were gone, you sat on the closest bench, holding your ribs. Hopefully they weren’t cracked - it hurt to breathe. You'd have to visit the infirmary as soon as things died down.
"She’s going to get even with you," Blondie said.
He was watching you. He hadn't moved. Blood was still running in thin streams down his cheek, like he was crying red.
"Yep. She's got a lot of friends too. It's not going to be fun."
"Why do you do that?"
"Do what?"
"Act so light hearted about everything. I can see your hands shaking."
You balled them into fists and avoided looking at him. The silence stretched.
Finally, "Why did you really kill your neighbour?"
"I didn't like his face."
"I don't believe you."
"Believe what you want. The court already made up its mind."
He finally moved. Picked up his baton and slipped it into his belt. Grabbed a towel and balled it up, then pressed it against his face. The white started spotting red almost immediately. You watched him from the corner of your eye.
"Give me the knife."
"It's called a shiv. You should know that."
You rubbed the handle against your pants, getting rid of any fingerprints. Redundant, given there were three witnesses who saw you stab another inmate. Old habits don't really die, you supposed.
You handed it to him without looking at his face.
He wrapped it in a smaller towel and stuck it in his belt.
You could hear faint sirens from beyond the door, and his radio was crackling with orders. The wardens seemed to be getting things under control.
"I'm throwing you in solitary. And then I'm requesting a transfer to another block."
"Aww shucks, I'll really miss you Blondie."
"Not a transfer for me, you idiot. A transfer for you. It won't stop her entirely. There's always a little bit of communication between the blocks, no matter how hard we try and prevent it. But it should give you some time to make friends of your own."
"I've never been very good at that."
"Maybe try being less sarcastic."
He grabbed your upper arm and pulled you to your feet. His grip was light, a formality more than anything.
"Why did you really save me?"
You couldn't look at him. You shrugged.
"It's like I said. You're the least terrible warden in here. Not a very high bar to be fair, but still."
He started towards the door and you followed.
There were officers coming down the corridor in full riot gear. He waved them down and thrust you towards one.
"Solitary. Protective custody."
"Why?"
Blondie didn't even hesitate. "Because she saved my life."
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Solitary wasn't so bad when the other option was tossing and turning on your bunk, just waiting for a knife to your ribs.
You'd almost call it relaxing. Your ribs were bandaged tight and the painkiller the doc gave you left you floating on a cloud of dope.
When you heard the footsteps pause outside your door, you didn't bother to get up.
Blondie didn't say anything for a long while. When he finally spoke, it was so soft that you had to strain to hear it.
"I still don't believe you. I don't think you're a cold blooded killer. I think that whatever happened between you and that man wasn't really brought before the court."
You sighed.
"Drop it Blondie."
"No."
Maybe it was the medicine or maybe it was the confession booth feeling of the half dark. Either way, you ended up giving away more than you intended.
"It doesn't matter. If the whole thing was public, it would only hurt people who've already been through enough."
"You had a reason for killing him."
"Yes."
"What?"
"I won't tell you. Won't tell anyone, ever. It's not my story to tell”
 “You're in jail because of it. Who else could possibly have more to lose?"
"You'd be surprised."
It was his turn to sigh.
"I'm going to find out eventually, y'know."
"Have fun with that. Don't give yourself a headache."
He sighed and walked away.
You didn't see him again for half a year.
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They kept you in solitary a whole week. Long enough for your ribs to stop hurting and for the bruises to lighten. Long enough for green eyes to be processed and transferred further up-state. That was unusual, even if she was the one who instigated the riot. You had a feeling someone pulled some strings behind the scenes. And you had an even stronger feeling about who it must have been.
When you were finally out, you were assigned to a new block. Your stuff was already waiting for you in your new cell, your books and CDs and a new letter from B.
Won't be able to write for a while. I've got something important to work on. Hopefully I'll be back soon.
You couldn't ignore the way that stung. Without meaning to, you'd come to rely on their letters. A little reprieve from the life you were stuck with.
The new block wasn't too bad. You took Blondie's advice and made some friends. Tried to avoid fights as much as possible. If green eyes ever managed to convince someone to get even for her, they didn't go through with it.
Life was, if not good, then at least bearable. You tried ignoring the little nagging part of you that constantly wondered about both Blondie and B. Without either of them, you felt...emptier somehow. Lonely.
When a warden came to tell you that you had a visitor, your heart lurched. Your family didn't visit you much anymore. And you cut off your friends the day you got convicted - no need to draw them into your mess. Secretly, you hoped it was B. You had no clue what they looked like, but after six months without hearing from them, you were almost desperate.
You smoothed down your uniform before you stepped into the visitors' centre, your eyes sweeping the room for familiar faces.
You noticed him almost immediately. Blondie, his hair shaggy when it wasn’t gelled back and his usual uniform replaced by a flannel shirt and jeans. A man was sitting next to him, his pinstripe suit still neat and pressed despite it being late afternoon.
He didn't even give you time to say hello.
"This is Mark Lawrence. Your lawyer."
You squinted at the man, confused. He was clearly a cut or two above the overworked district attorney who'd handled your case.
"No he isn't. I haven't seen him before in my life."
He sighed, irritated. "Mark is the lawyer I hired to represent you when we go to court next month."
"...Why am I going to court next month?"
"To challenge the original ruling."
"Okay. Why?"
"Because I've found another witness to your case, one that didn't testify last time."
You felt like were slammed face first into a bucket of icy water. With rusted nails in it.
"Who?"
"The victim's daughter."
"No."
"Yes."
Your handcuffs rattled as your balled your hands into fists.
"She's just a kid. What she needs is to put the past behind her, not re-live every minute of it up on the witness stand. No. We're not doing this."
You glared at him and he met you straight on. The tension cracked.
The lawyer finally interjected.
"Knowing the full details of the case changes things dramatically. Your charge goes from first degree murder to manslaughter. We might be able to cut your sentence down to fifteen years or less, with time served contributing."
"No. I'm not putting that little girl up on the stand."
Blondie practically snarled. "Yes. You. Are."
"No. I'm. Not."
"She's so much older now! Practically a teenager. She can handle it. And besides, she said she's happy to do it."
"You spoke to her?!"
Could this day get any worse? Why the hell did he have to go and drag up old memories? It must have been just as unpleasant for the kid as it was for you.
"Yes. Myself and the original detective both."
"Why? Is this what you've been doing the past six months? Trying to overturn my sentence?"
He looked away from you for the first time, his ears turning red.
"Yes."
You leaned back in your chair, conflicted and confused more than anything else. You hated to admit it, but a part of really wanted this. Even if the chance was slim, even if it meant another round of dockets and cross questioning. You were tired of prison. You wanted your life back.
You watched the late afternoon sun reflecting off the ceiling.
"I want to talk to her first. And then...maybe."
"Deal." Blondie sounded immensely satisfied.
You kept watching the sun and half listening to the conversations around you.
"Why are you doing this for me Blondie?"
Your voice was awfully soft.
"I'm returning a favour."
Your eyes slid to the lawyer.
"Pretty damn expensive way to do it."
He smirked. "I prefer my method to yours. Requires a whole lot less stabbing."
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The kid came to visit you the next day. Blondie was right. She was almost a teenager. Did time really go by so fast?
You grinned at her.
"Hey kid. Sorry to drag you out to this place, but they don't let me out much."
"I bet."
She’d lost a lot of the baby fat from her cheeks and her dark eyes didn't have the haunted look you remembered so well.
"How's life with your aunt?"
"Great actually. The school is nice and we've got this Great Dane. And she isn't like... well, she isn't like my dad."
That made you happy. The kid deserved something good after everything she’d been through.
She broke in before you could keep asking questions.
"I want to do it. I want to testify against my father."
You paused, your smile fading. You could still hear her voice from that night, high and tinny and begging her dad to stop.
He hadn't stopped. He hadn't stopped beating his little girl until the moment you sunk a knife into his chest.
You swallowed, your mouth tasting like metal.
"Are you sure? It's not going to be easy."
She met your eyes. "I don't care. You saved me. I'm not going to let you rot in a place like this."
When she left, you couldn't help thinking about her eyes. The last time you saw her, she wouldn't even look at your face. Wouldn't say more than three words at a time.
The kid might never outrun her past, but she’d done a damn good job so far.
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You tried not to be too hopeful. Homicide was almost impossible to overturn.
You tried not to be too hopeful, but the lawyer Blondie hired clearly knew his stuff. He laid it all out in front the judge.
How you used to babysit the kid when her dad wasn't around. How the man used to get violent when he was drunk, but never hit the kid until that night.
How you heard the screaming and banged at his door for fifteen minutes.  How you broke in through a back window when it wouldn't stop.
How you found the girl half dead with her father standing over her. Still going at it.
How you grabbed a knife, just to try and threaten him, maybe bring him back to his senses.
How he attacked you. How you stabbed him and then kept stabbing him until he stopped moving. 
How you bundled the kid off to her aunt and then called the cops on yourself.
The whole story this time. No pleading guilty and then sitting back down without another word. No half hearted defence by a state lawyer already over worked and underpaid. No half truths.
It took three weeks of court dates to get through the whole story, with witnesses and cross examination. By the time it was done, you wanted to wash your hands of the whole mess. Innocent or guilty, you just wanted to stop reliving that night.
The judge was a hard faced man who'd seen a thousand criminals come and go. You didn't have much hope for yourself when the bailiff told you to rise for the verdict.
"In the case of the state versus the accused, in regards to the appeal and additional information provided to the court, the court hereby considers this appeal to be..."
You felt your heart stutter. The last time you were in court listening to a verdict the outcome was a forgone conclusion.
"Granted."
You almost sat back down, your knees weak. There's no way. After all this time, were you really about to have your freedom back?
The judge continued, "The accused's sentence has been adjusted to account for time served. The original sentence of life imprisonment with the chance of parole after thirty years has been changed to immediate parole on strict assessment."
The judge looked at you, eyes maybe a little softer than they were before.
"This court will never condone murder, not even in defence of a child. But I think it's clear, young lady, that you've spent more than enough time behind bars."
Your lips felt numb. Your whole future changed in one sentence. In one afternoon. It was staggering.
"Thank you, your honour."
The bailiff read out a list of regulations to follow. Weekly check ins with both a parole officer and a state psychiatrist. No furthers run ins with the law, not even misdemeanours. If even one person close to you felt you were a threat, they could report it to the police and have you sent back to jail almost immediately. You were on house arrest until further notice. It was one of the strictest parole agreements you'd ever heard.
You didn't care if they told you to do a hundred push ups morning and evening. You were free again. You were going to behave like a damn saint for the rest of your days.
The only hiccup was when he mentioned the address that you were registered to stay at. You raised a brow at your lawyer but he avoided your eyes.
When court was finally dismissed, the first thing you did as a free woman was give Blondie a hug.
He was much taller than you, though you'd never realised it before.
"How much do I owe you? When I get a job, we can work out some kind repayment plan."
He waved you away and lead you from the courthouse. You tried to ask your lawyer about the house arrest, but he managed to slip away before you could.
His car was waiting for you. A new Camaro barely a year months old.
You let out a low whistle.
"She’s a beauty."
When you climbed into the passenger seat, you were sure to buckle your seat belt. No tickets for you, not ever.
The car started up with a thrumming purr.
It ate away at the road, even in the dense city centre. It wasn't long before you were almost at the city limits and cruising.
"By the way, do you know where I'll be staying? I didn't recognise the address."
You couldn't be sure, but it seemed like his hands tightened on the steering wheel just a tad.
"Mm-hmm. You're staying with me."
What? You couldn't possibly do that to him.
"Thank you. But don't you feel a little awkward having a felon in your home? I've still got my savings from before. I can rent my own place for a little."
"You're staying with me. Do you know how hard it is to get a good apartment with a criminal record?"
"I guessed as much. But Blondie, I already owe you. I can't possibly intrude on your life. Maybe you think you still owe me from that day. You don't. We're square."
He was quiet for a bit, but finally managed to force a smile into his voice.
"No. I'm not doing this because I feel indebted to you."
He kept his eyes on the road, his hand loose and confident on the wheel. His sleeves were rolled up again and you got your first good look at his tattoos. They were a collection of really well done pieces, each small tattoo blending with the others. Mostly fine line work, simple and clean.
"Why are you doing it then?"
He didn't answer.
When you arrived, his house was ranch style three bedroom with a huge, rolling yard and a neat wraparound porch.
You let out another low whistle.
"How do you afford this on a correction officer's salary?"
"I don't. It's paid off already. I was in the USMC for a long time. The money was good."
"I knew you weren't a normal civvie."
He grinned. "What gave it away?"
"The muscles."
He laughed and pulled your duffel bag from the trunk.
You'd told your parents to donate all your clothes when you were first sentenced. You didn't think you'd ever be free again so why hoard? Someone out there was probably making good use of your Doc Martens and distressed denim. Whatever normal clothes you currently had were what you were locked up with. The outfit on your back and little else.
The suitcase was instead filled with your meagre prison possessions, the stuff you didn't want to leave behind. Your collection of books. Some postcards. The CDs that B sent you.
Blondie carried it across the lawn like it weighed nothing at all.
Stepping into his house was a surreal experience. You hadn't been inside someone else's home since the night of your crime. Your last few years were exclusive to the grimy and outdated rooms of state buildings.
It was like stepping back in time. Or more accurately, like stepping into a future you thought was lost to you.
Clean, without the tang of cheap, industrial grade bleach. The walls painted and wallpapered instead of just whitewashed. The feeling of finally being somewhere you could relax. Not an in-between place.
Home.
He showed you to your room, a neat guest bedroom across from his, with a double bed and wide windows.
You didn't sit down on the bed or on the neat desk chair. You didn't feel clean enough. You still felt the stink and grime of prison clinging to you.
He raised a brow but showed you where the bathroom was.
It was another taste of freedom. Showers in prison were monitored and timed affairs. No standing under the water and just enjoying the heat, no taking the time to scrub and exfoliate. In and out and done as quick as possible.
You stood under the hot water for a long time, your face wet not just from the spray.
When you finally climbed out, you felt clean for the first time in years.
Blondie was gone when you got downstairs, a hasty note scrawled on the fridge about grabbing you some new clothes. You tilted your head at the handwriting. You could swear it looked so familiar... But no, it couldn't be. That was ridiculous.
You brewed yourself a hot drink, fully intending to sit on the porch and enjoy it. Like a little old woman.
The backdoor was locked.
You frowned. Okay, not that uncommon. Folk kept their doors locked all the time. He probably intended you to use the front door instead.
But that one was locked too.
So were all the downstairs windows. Closed shut with little hatches you hadn't noticed earlier.
You tried not to panic. He was probably just looking out for you. Being careful. You were still a felon. How did he know you weren't going to make a break for it the second you could, his tv and laptop in tow?
It was fine. You were fine. You could just drink at the table and wait for him to get home. You kept telling yourself that, even as you searched through the kitchen drawers for a spare key.
Nothing.
You didn't want to panic. You'd spent years locked away. Wasn't this much nicer than a cell?
No. Because at least in a cell you had no illusions about your freedom.
You ended up in his bedroom without knowing when you'd gotten there. You didn't dig through his drawers. He'd know instantly. But you did open them all, one by one, as if you'd find the key right on top of his neatly folded shirts.
You found the letters in the last drawer. The one right next to his bed, like he read them every night.
It took you a while to recognise them, even though you were looking at your own handwriting.
Your letters to B. Every single one of them. The envelopes neatly cut open and the letters themselves stacked in chronological order. The most recent one was at the very top and you picked it up with numb hands.
Hey B! Guess who's going back to court. Guess they missed seeing me strutting down the aisle.
Don't worry. I haven't down anything bad (at least not this time). Someone who thinks they owe me a favour has gotten it into their head that the best way to repay me is to get me out of jail.
The legal way, that is. No midnight tunnels or disguises. (Boo. How boring. What happened to romance?)
I don't have much hope, but at least it means a break in the monotony. And nicer chow.
You'd better write me soon. Can't believe I'm admitting this out loud, but I get a warm fuzzy feeling in my heart whenever I get a new letter from you. I think it must be acid reflux.
-your favourite felon.
B did, in fact, write back quickly. For the last time - no return address on the letter. In that, and in so many other ways, it was clear it was the final letter you were getting.
You're the most complicated person I've ever met. Caring and kind but somehow wrapped up in the most sarcastic personality. I've fallen in love with you. Stupid. Incredibly stupid. But it's true.
I love you.
-B
You'd sat in your cell with your eyes almost bugging out of your skull. Wondering what B did to have the misfortune of falling for a girl like you. Wondering if you could have loved them back, if given the chance. Wondering who they really were.
Well, here was your answer. B, the person who wrote you sarcastic poetry and hunted down your favourite books, was Blondie, the warden who owed you his life.
And he was in love with you.
You sat down, knees replaced by lunch time jelly cups.
No wonder he did what he did. No wonder he paid for an attorney and got your house arrest registered at his house. No wonder he kept the doors and windows locked.
There was a light step behind you and you flew to your feet, the letter still clutched in your fist.
He was standing in the doorway, watching you with cool blue eyes.
"So. You found them."
You couldn't answer.
He stepped into the room, his eyes never leaving yours. He'd taken off his shirt and stood in only his tank top and jeans, his arms lean with muscle. You'd spent years fighting and you knew in one glance that you could never take him. He was stronger. Had years of Marine and police training. It had taken three prisoners and a razor blade to finally hold him. What chance did you have?
"The world isn't built for prisoners. Rehabilitation is hard. What were the stats again? Eight out of every ten end up back in jail before ten years is up?"
He continued towards you, as calm as ever.
"You're safer here. With me. You said you'd be a great housewife remember?"
"I was joking," you managed. "Just kidding around."
He reached you and gently took the letter from your unresisting fingers.
"I won't make you do anything you don't want to. But you're not leaving me. You're not leaving this house."
"Why?"
He smiled, that half smile that gave you a glimpse past his tough guy shell. This time, you didn't like what you saw.
"You know why."
"I'm a terrible person to love. I'm prickly and sarcastic and I suck at doing the dishes."
"I've got a dishwasher."
"All I know how to cook is fried chicken."
He wrinkled his nose. "We'll work on it."
"I snore all night."
"You don't. I've watched you sleep."
"Really?"
"Really. I'd stop outside your cell and just watch you sometimes. I couldn't help it. You're so much calmer when you sleep. It's like seeing another version of you."
He tilted his head and closed the last bit of distance between you, until you could smell his cologne and see the flecks of green in his eyes. You'd never noticed them before.
"There are worse cells than this, aren't there? All you have to do is stay with me. Be happy. Let me love you."
"Do I have a choice?"
He smiled that secret smile again.
"Nope. It's either me or straight back to prison."
It was true. He was a model citizen – a veteran with a clean record as a corrections officer. Even if you did talk to your mandated psychologist or parole officer, they wouldn’t believe you. You’d be the ungrateful prisoner trying to manipulate her way out of house arrest.
You knew it from the start. Rule one - never trust a warden. They never have your best interests at heart. All they want is to cover their own skin and get theirs.
But, you never were very good at following the rules, were you?
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tacharie · 5 days ago
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every nanami headcannons post i see is like “nanami is a provider, nanami is a breadwinner...”
ARE YOU KIDDING. NANAMI NEEDS A WOMAN WHO MAKES BAG SO HE CAN QUIT HIS JOB AND BE A HOUSEHUSBAND.
this man HATES work and you’re telling me that he wants to be the sole provider? PLEASE be real for a second. nanami was built for domesticity. he needs a girl who can buy a cute little house by the sea where all he has to worry about is reading his books and loving his woman.
like this man will make sure you come home every night to a clean house and a warm dinner and then eat ur pussy like a champ. his girl takes care of him so he’s gonna take care of her and he’s gonna take care of her good.
service dom to end all service doms. you want dick after a long day of work? he’s gonna make you see stars and then take care of you like a princess. you want to be slapped around? sure. he’ll tie you up and use you, but best believe your cumming at least 4 times. you want it soft and gentle? that’s what you’ll get. anything for his hard working baby.
and once you're nice and worn out and sleeping comfortably in bed, he's going to the kitchen to make ur lunch for tomorrow. complete with a little note on the napkin reminding you how much he loves you.
nanami deserves a life as a malewife. keep that man barefoot and in the kitchen.
this is the correct opinion and i will not be arguing my point any further at this time. thank you for listening.
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tacharie · 5 days ago
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Christine - A Yandere Short Story
Based on Christine by Stephen King After your boyfriend's death, you're eager to sell his vintage Mustang. The car reminds you far too much of him and worse than that, it feels oddly alive. The only problem? Your dead boyfriend isn't ready to let go. Tags: Male Yanderes x Fem Reader, Horror, Character Death, 12k words Taglist: @mel-vaz
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When your boyfriend died, you and Christine were the only witnesses.
All through his funeral, you kept thinking of ways to get rid of her. You were being paranoid and you knew it - she couldn't speak even if she wanted to. But having her around put you on edge, made you grit your teeth until your jaw ached.
After the wake, you approached your boyfriend's parents and asked if you could have her. They were pale and shaken, reeling from the suddeness of death just as much as from grief. His father nodded like a sleep walker, his voice older than his years.
"He would have wanted you to have her. She's yours."
His mother squeezed your shoulder. "I can't imagine what you're going through, dear. Whatever his faults, my boy loved you. I know that."
You managed a smile, managed to thank them through the tears that were suddenly falling. But your mind was on Christine. Always on Christine.
You were the last to leave the funeral parlour. You tried to tell yourself it was a coincidence, but deep down you knew the truth. You were scared. Scared of Christine, scared of your too quiet townhouse, scared of the dreams that would come when you closed your eyes.
It was early evening and the streetlights were coming on in the narrow tree lined avenue outside the funeral parlour. When you stepped out, goosebumps crawled across your arms.
She was waiting for you.
Christine. Your boyfriend's 1969 Mustang, cherry red and entirely rebuilt.
She was directly under a streetlight and her paint gleamed. The light reflected off her windshield so you couldn't see inside, but for a second it seemed like someone was already sitting behind the wheel.
You squeezed your eyes shut. When you opened them, the shadow driver was gone.
Christine. For most of your relationship, you loved her just as much as your boyfriend did. She was a labour of love and you felt it every time you sat in her passenger seat.
But things were different now.
You walked towards her cautiously. It was ridiculous to be scared of a car, but you were.
When you opened the driver side door, you almost expected to see your boyfriend. Despite the funeral, the wake, the late morning call to please come and identify a body down at the morgue, you still expected to see him. Light green eyes looking up at you, half smile that was half teasing and half lecherous.
The seats were empty.
You slid behind the wheel, your breathing shaky. You almost never drove Christine. Not that your boyfriend didn't offer. It was just that you liked riding passenger - liked looking over and seeing your man with one hand on the wheel and the other on your thigh, liked seeing the muscles flex in his forearm when he steered.
The car still smelled like him. That was the first thing you noticed. Despite being impounded for a week while the cops did forensics, despite the valet scrubbing and steaming the seats to get the blood out, it still smelled like him.
You rested your head against the steering wheel, closed your eyes and sobbed for the first time since the night you killed your boyfriend.
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When you put Christine up for sale, the calls started coming in almost immediately. It wasn't surprising - she was in incredible shape, she ran like a dream, and her white leather upholstery was original.
At first, you thought you'd be able to sell her before the month was up. The buyers would look under the hood and whistle in admiration.
But something always changed when they took her for a test drive. You couldn't understand it - she would drive perfectly but by the time you got home, the buyers were almost always frowning at you, or worse - not looking at you at all.
No matter how fanatic they were at first, no one wanted Christine.
You dropped the price and then dropped it again, but still no takers. The car spent all winter in the garage. You'd turn her on to idle every few days, clean off any dust and check that the mice weren't nibbling at the wiring, but you never stuck around for long.
It hurt to leave her locked away - your boyfriend poured so much of himself into her - but it hurt even worse to drive her. Whenever you were behind the wheel, you could feel the gaping emptiness of the passenger seat, could still see the bloodstains.
It was on the first warm day of spring when someone finally bought her.
Colt Guilder called you when you were just about ready to give up on selling her. You were literally about to take down the ad when your phone rang. The voice on the other end was deep, with a slight southern drawl that immediately reminded you of your boyfriend.
"Can I come and take a look today? I wouldn't want to impose ma'am, but I'm in a hurry to see her before anyone else gets a chance to buy her."
Her. Even the older buyers didn't really call cars 'her' anymore.
"Sure. You can come by this afternoon."
You were sitting on the porch steps when he pulled up, a jug of iced tea and your novel abandoned next to you. He stepped out of his Jeep, a tall man in blue jeans and boots, and you felt your heart lurch. Something deep inside you told you that this was the man who would finally take her off your hands.
He smiled at you as he approached and for a second you wanted to warn him away. Wanted to tell him the truth about Christine.
"Howdy ma'am. I'm real happy you agreed to meet me so last minute."
You smiled at him and shook his hand and bit back the truth. Oh, how you would come to hate that decision.
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When he pulled up, Colt wasn't expecting the Mustang's owner to be a pretty little thing in a sundress. He was a gentleman, his mama raised him right, but even he had trouble keeping his eyes on your face and not letting them wander lower.
His hand swallowed yours when he shook it and it was hard not to notice the softness of your skin. Whoever rebuilt the Mustang, it wasn't you. You had the hands of a lady, not a mechanic.
"The car is out back. Keys are waiting for you. She's been serviced pretty regularly and my... my boyfriend built her up himself."
You started for the garage and he fell into step behind you. You were so much shorter than him - it was kind of cute to see your head bobbing in front of him. Like a pixie in a sundress.
"How come your man ain't the one to sell it?"
He wasn't surprised you had a boyfriend. Hell, he'd have tried his luck if he could. No doubt other men had the same idea.
"He... he passed away a few moths ago."
He cringed. Nice going, Colt. Bringing up painful memories only three sentences into conversation. Must be a world record.
"I'm so sorry ma'am. I had no idea."
You shrugged. "It's fine."
He was about to say something else when Christine came into view. Her grille was a newly buffed silver and her deep red paint caught the spring sun.
He gave a low whistle. "Pictures don't do her justice."
You smiled at that, but edged out of the car's direct line of sight. Neither of you consciously noticed it, but you approached the car like you would an animal. Slightly from the side so it couldn't charge at you.
"Mind if I take a look under the hood?"
"Be my guest."
He popped the hood and let out another low whistle. Without even looking past the surface level stuff, it was clear your boyfriend knew how to build an engine. The Mustang looked almost new.
"How long did this take?"
You leaned against the garage door and crossed your arms.
"A long time. He bought her a few months after we started dating. She was gonna be scrapped - looked like a total rust bucket."
He raised his eyebrows. If that was true, the body restoration alone must have cost a fortune. Did you realise how valuable a vintage ride like this was worth?
"Y'know, just from looking under the hood, I can tell you could get at least three times as much as you're asking."
If his uncle heard him sabotaging himself like that, he'd have given Colt a whack on the head. Truth was, he wanted the car. Wanted her so bad he would have taken out three separate loans to afford her.
But he wasn't a monster. It wasn't fair to buy something so fine from a girl who might not understand its true worth.
You raised your brows, more surprised at his honesty than at his statement.
"I know she's worth more. But I'm in a hurry to get rid of her. And well..."
You looked away. "People find the car a bit strange."
It was his turn to be surprised. He couldn't see any red flags in her upkeep or her paintwork. Maybe it was a deeper issue.
You pushed yourself away from the wall and nodded at the door.
"Keys are waiting for you. Take her for a drive and decide for yourself."
The interior was just as well taken care of as he expected - a tough job when the upholstery was mostly white. The keys had a tag attached with a name engraved in metal.
"Christine?"
"It's what we call her. It was a joke at first but the name sort of stuck."
You slid into the passenger seat and tugged your seat belt across your chest. He glanced at you out the corner of his eye and -
'Silly thing, doesn't she know better than to get into a car with a stranger twice her size?'
He shook his head, like that could dislodge the idea. He wasn't that sort of man, wasn't some kind predator with a mind full of filth.
'It would be so easy. You're so much bigger than her, so much stronger. You want her. Why not just take what you want?'
Where the hell was this coming from? He might have a guilty thought every once in a while, but he was always quick to squash it down. It wasn't like him to think something so...forceful about a girl.
He turned the key and the engine roared to life. And it really was a roar. V8 engine growling so loud he could feel the vibration through the steering wheel.
Oh baby, he was sold on her right then and there. The devil himself couldn't have outbid him. What little boy didn't dream of a car like this? Didn't spend his childhood looking through magazines and brawling over matchbox versions?
The clutch was smooth as butter as he cruised down your driveway and turned onto the main road.
God, he wanted to gun it. Floor the gas and find out for himself just how powerful old school muscle was.
He looked over at you, about to ask if you knew exactly what your boyfriend did to the engine. You were looking out at the passing trees, your hair stirring in the slight breeze from his open window.
'She looks like she belongs here, with you.'
It was another foreign thought, something he wouldn't expect of himself. But it was true. The Mustang would have felt empty without you - in your sundress and white sneakers, you completed the picture. Your boyfriend must have rebuilt the car just for you, as a way to keep you next to him. Colt wasn't sure why he thought that, but somehow he knew it was true. Whoever your man was, he put so much of himself into this car that Colt almost felt like he was right next to the guy.
You turned to him, fingers fidgeting with the hem of your dress.
"What do you think?"
"She runs sweet as apple pie."
You felt your heart stutter. Your boyfriend used to say the exact same thing.
"You alright there sweetheart? You look a little pale."
"Sorry. Just a little car sick."
Car sick was right - you were sick to hell of this damn car and the way it played with your emotions.
"C'mon, I know a diner just off the highway. We can stop for some fresh air and a bite to eat. You'll feel better in no time."
You didn't have time to protest before he switched lanes and turned onto the highway.
The diner he took you to really was just off the highway, a retro looking spot railed off from a steep cliff.
"How did you know about this place?"
He shrugged. "I must have heard about it from someone."
Strange. Colt didn't think he'd ever seen the place before, much less heard about it. But when you looked at him with that slight hint of panic, that sudden fear, somehow he knew this was the place to bring you.
He climbed out and opened your door for you before you had a chance to do it yourself.
"You know this place?" he asked.
If anything, you looked even paler than before. "Yeah. My boyfriend and I used to come up here pretty often."
He frowned, annoyed at himself for somehow making this even worse. "We can go somewhere else if you want."
"No!" You took a deep breath. "No, this is fine. I just need a moment away from the car, that's all."
He led you to a picnic table near the edge of the cliff. Far below you, the main road clung to the cliffside and disappeared into the trees.
"You just sit pretty and I'll grab us some chow."
You smiled up at him. "Thanks Colt. Really. I know this is probably eating into your day."
He waved it away. "Trust me, this is a much better way to spend the weekend than what I had planned."
It was true. He'd wanted to see the car and somehow that turned into lunch with a pretty girl at a table with one hell of a view. Maybe Christine had some good luck about her. Maybe all of this was just meant to be.
When he stepped into the diner, he was greeted by jukebox country music and the smell of good, strong coffee. He didn't bother to look at the menu. Somehow, he knew exactly what to order.
"I'll have a banana spilt, some fries and a toasted sandwich." He smiled at the elderly waitress. "Please and thank you Agnes."
"Sure thing sugar."
He frowned. How the hell did he know the waitress's name?
Must have seen her name tag, right? That made sense. Must have been a half second, subconscious glance.
When she handed him his change, he dropped his eyes to her lapel. No name tag. No label. Not even a necklace with her initials on it.
It was a warm spring day but he still shivered. Something strange was going on.
No, don't be ridiculous. Agnes was a common name, a vintage diner kind of name. That was probably why he said it. His mind must have just made a lucky guess. There's no way he could know her name when he didn't even know about the diner until he pulled up.
Unless... it wasn't him that knew her name. Maybe it was someone else, something else speaking through him.
"C'mon Colt, don't be an idiot," he muttered to himself.
"You say something sugar?"
He jerked his head to the side, his heart lurching. Just the waitress, just Agnes, looking at him with raised brows.
"No ma'am. Just thinking out loud."
"Alrighty then. Here's your order. Be careful not to spill the chocolate sauce. It's hell to clean up."
"Yes ma'am. Thank you ma'am. Have a good day."
He was stupidly happy to step out of the restaurant. The place must have been getting to him. Why else was he suddenly so superstitious?
"You doing okay Colt?" you asked.
He grinned at you. "Just dandy sweetheart. I got you a banana split and some French fries."
"Oh! That's perfect, thank you."
See? Nothing strange at all. He had a sweet ride and a sweeter girl waiting for him. Why worry about some weird diner?
He sat down across from you and unwrapped his sandwich. Behind you, Christine looked at him with a shining chrome smile.
"Listen, you can get a whole lot more for a car that fine. But if you're willing to let her go for the price in the ad, I'll buy her today," he said.
You froze, a fry halfway to your mouth. He really wanted her? He wasn't coming up with some lame excuse or hurrying off with a mumbled apology?
"Done," you said, a bit too quickly.
You were finally getting rid of Christine. No more nightmares, no more tip toeing around the garage like you were scared she might notice you, no more unwanted memories every time you laid eyes on her.
You were burying your past like it should have been buried on the day of your boyfriend's funeral.
He offered you his hand and you shook it, a genuine smile on your face.
"She's all yours." And thank God for that.
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Colt drove you home and followed you into the house to collect the car registration papers.
You frowned at your empty desk drawer. You could have sworn you left the documents right here...
You popped your head into the living room where Colt was waiting.
"Give me a second. I think I left them upstairs."
"Sure. I'm in no hurry."
He wandered around your living room while you were gone, too keyed up to sit still. It was a neat, modern room with art on the walls. The big bay windows opened onto the front yard and the driveway where Christine sat waiting for him.
Part of him still couldn't believe it. She really was his dream car. The sort of ride all his work buddies would be green with envy over.
He leaned against the windowsil and then quickly looked down when his hand brushed something metallic.
Picture frames, the small kind that usually sat on a desk. He picked one up, the frame cool against his skin. It was a picture of you and someone he guessed to be your boyfriend. Both of you were in formal wear - you in a deep red evening gown and him in a tailored tux. Christine was parked in the background, her red a compliment to your dress.
Your boyfriend was handsome in a rough cut sort of way, his hair swept back and a tattoo just peeking out of his shirt. He was looking directly at the camera while you looked up at him, his arm curled tightly around your waist.
Colt frowned. There was something about the man's expression... a kind of possessive meanness. He seemed the type of guy to start a fight and then finish it no matter what, a real tough customer.
And the way he held you... some might call it loving but Colt found it more proprietary than anything else.
'Mine. My girl, no matter what. Try and take her from me and I'll show you a world of hurt.'
Colt put the picture down with a frown and scanned the others. Out hiking on the mountains, at the beach, holding a huge bouquet while he kissed you. A perfect couple except... except for the way he looked at you. Sweet, yes. But somehow dangerous, in the way rattlesnakes and cougars were. Fine if they weren't disturbed, but tread on their territory and there'd be hell to pay.
He moved away when he heard you coming down the stairs. You were a little flushed, a little out of breath, but you grinned at him and waved a stack of papers.
"Finally found them! Just need to sign the change of ownership forms and she's all yours."
He watched you as you searched for a pen, your sundress swishing 'round your thighs. He didn't like your boyfriend - dead or not, he seemed like one mean bastard - but seeing you so happy, so flushed with life and hope and joy, Colt found he could almost understand the other man. If you were his girl, he'd hold you just as tight.
You finally found a pen and he scribbled his signature on the dotted line.
"Well, seems like you're the proud new owner of a 1969 Ford Mustang. Congratulations."
He carefully took the papers from you, his fingers brushing yours. "Real good doing business with you sweetheart."
You lead him out to the car, going through the list of things he'd need to do to properly register the car as his. Real cute of you, to think he didn't know it all already.
He slid into the driver's seat and when he touched the wheel, he felt that same sense of power. And under it, a strange feeling of being not quiet alone in the car.
You stood outside his window, running through a catalogue of spares and repairs that he might want to check out. If he had to guess, you seemed nervous.
He leaned back and smiled at you. "It's alright y/n. I ain't changing my mind. Deals done, remember?"
It was the first time using your name and it sent a small bolt of electricity jolting through him.
'Her name is mighty sweet, ain't it? Meant to be said oh so softly, meant to be savoured.'
You looked at him like you felt it too, your cheeks just a little warmer than before.
Oh Lord, what sort of bastard was he? Feeling this way about you when your boyfriend was in the ground for scarcely half a year? You were probably still mourning, still nursing your broken heart. He should be a gentleman and leave you alone, shouldn't take advantage of your vulnerability. He should be a good man.
'You'd be an idiot to let her go.'
The thought streaked through his mind. It almost didn't feel like his own idea. Wherever the thought came from, it wasn't wrong. He really would be an idiot to not ask you out when he had a chance. He got lucky with the car - prize piece like this would have been snatched up in a matter of hours. If he didn't ask you out, if he didn't push his luck for the second time, the same thing might happen with you.
"How 'bout I take you out to dinner later this week? As a thank you."
You looked unsure, your eyes jumping down to the car keys like you were expecting an objection.
"Please? I know Christine must mean a lot to you. I'd feel a whole lot better taking her off your hands if I could thank you properly."
You bit your lower lip and he found his eyes drawn to the sight of it. Please say yes please say-
"Yes, I think I'd like that. But no later than eight, okay?"
YES! He rubbed a palm across his jaw to hide his smile.
"I'll bring you home early, promise."
"I'll hold you to that, cowboy."
Oh god, he wanted to melt when you called him that. It was so silly - big guy like him getting butterflies over a sort-of kind-of date.
'Atta boy. You ain't gonna regret it.'
He was too distracted watching you walk away to realise the thought wasn't his own.
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That night, you slept without dreaming. For the first time since your boyfriend's death, you didn't see his face when you closed your eyes.
You woke up the next morning expecting to be relieved. Christine was gone, wasn't that exactly what you wanted?
Yes, but...but what happens next? You weren't an idiot nor were you unduly superstitious, but Christine didn't feel like a normal car. Maybe that's what happens after a violent death - things change, the blood seeps through the fabric and poisons the aura, or the energy, or whatever the hell you wanted to call it.
You made yourself breakfast but couldn't eat more than a few bites.
Okay, try and be logical. It was probably just your guilt playing tricks on you. You loved Christine and you loved your boyfriend, so it was only natural that you'd feel terrible about selling her. That's all. Blood and death can't change the nature of an inanimate object, no matter how violent or grisly it might have been.
Right. Just your guilty conscience. No need to work yourself up.
Across town, Colt slept through his alarm. He was dreaming, a sweet little fantasy of cruising down the highway on a brilliant summer day. You were next to him, your sundress even shorter than before, smiling at him and running your hand up his thigh.
You were his girl. His and his alone. He could feel the certainty of it in every part of him. You loved him, you stood by him, you did everything you could to support him, you were his.
Christine purred through her gears and he pushed the gas a little more, eager to get home. He would show you exactly how much he appreciated you - inch by inch and kiss by kiss.
"I love you darlin'. I need you to know that," he said. His voice didn't sound like his own. It was raspier, with an edge of meanness that not even love could soften.
You looked at him, smiling all soft and sweet. "I know. I've always known."
Colt jerked awake, smiling and shivering at the same time. He rubbed his eyes and sat up, disoriented and feeling like a stranger in his own body.
"One hell of a dream," he muttered.
'Not a dream cowboy. A memory from someone long dead.'
He ignored the thought, his mind already focused on the day ahead. He'd driven Christine home yesterday, but left his Jeep parked outside your house. He could either get one of his buddies pick it up or take a taxi over and get it himself.
Was it even a choice? He wanted to see you again. If he had to pay an ungodly amount for an Uber, he would.
Should he call you before showing up at your door? What would be a good time to see you? He didn't want to show up too late and catch you in a rush to leave.
'She'll be awake by now. But she'll only leave for work after twelve.'
How did he know that? Did you mention it yesterday?
He climbed out of bed and half stumbled to the bathroom. As the steam clouded up the mirror, he thought of his dream. And what might have happened if he'd stayed asleep longer. Maybe your hand would wander further up his thigh, and then...
He lathered up his fist and took hold of himself. He was already hard from just the thought of you. Your sundress looked so damn flimsy. He could probably yank it off you with just one hand.
He groaned, his forehead pressed against the tile. Picturing your hand dwarfed by his when you shook on the sale; how soft your skin was, how good it would feel if you touched him just like this.
'Fucking yourself like a dog at the thought of her.'
He agreed. You really were turning him into a dog.
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You were sitting in your living room, trying and failing to read your novel, when he knocked on your front window. You struggled to smooth down your hair while you scrambled for the door.
"Hi Colt! Came to pick up your Jeep?"
He was wearing blue jeans again today, with a tight wife beater that showed off arms thick with muscle.
"Yes ma'am. Thought I'd stop by and see if you needed anything."
That made you smile. How often does someone go out of their way to check up on a stranger?
"I don't think so. But I've got some fresh orange juice and donuts, if you'd like to come in."
He smiled at you and for a second his gaze dipped down past your chin. "There's nothing I'd like better."
He took up a lot of space at your kitchen table, but you found it comforting. The room felt too big without your boyfriend to fill it.
You flipped open the box of donuts and he picked out the mint chocolate one.
"Never really liked the mint ones," he told you, "But I've got an awful craving for one right now."
"Oh I never liked them much either. It was my boyfriend who was the die-hard mint fan."
He looked away from you, one hand coming up to rub the back of his neck. "It must be hard for you. Losing him so suddenly."
"It was. It is. Everyone keeps telling me it gets easier, but it hasn't. Up until last night, I dreamt about him everynight."
"Dreamt of him?" he asked you suddenly, his eyes intense.
"Yep. Every single night. It was like I was reliving my memories again and again."
He looked a bit perturbed at your statement, but you put it down to him feeling awkward about the conversation. Death is never a fun or casual topic.
"So how's Christine treating you?"
"Like a dream. I was thinking of taking her down the coast next weekend. All open road and sea air." He paused, seeming to weigh something up in his mind. "Why don't you join me? The morning after I take you out to dinner. We can pack a picnic and have lunch at the cape."
"That sounds incredible." You looked down at your hands, slightly uneasy but not sure why. Your boyfriend spoke about doing that once. A mini road trip with the windows down and the sea breeze in your hair.
It's not that strange that Colt had the same idea, right? Everyone knew the coast road was a long, quiet stretch. Perfect for putting Christine to the test.
"You're gonna love it," he said. "I'll even make my world famous tiramisu."
You raised a brow. "You know how to make tiramisu?" Big guy like him didn't really seem the patisserie type. Did he have a cute apron with bows on it too?
He pointed his donut at you, blue eyes twinkling. "Not just any tiramisu. World famous."
You snorted out a laugh and for the first time in months, you kitchen felt like a happy place.
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He dreamt about you again that night. Christine was parked in a dark corner on the edge of a cliffside hiking trail. He could hear waves crashing far below. It was nighttime, with the full moon outlining your face in silver and shadow.
He was in the driver's seat and you were straddling his lap. You were wearing a sweater and a cute pleated skirt that seemed oh so short with the way you leaned over him.
"You've been ignoring me," you accused him. You were pouting in an adorably petulant way. He looked at your lips - red and slightly swollen - and knew that he'd just been kissing you.
"I haven't been ignorin' you sugar. I've just been busy."
He spoke with that same raspy voice that somehow wasn't his.
"Too busy to say hello or drop by for dinner?"
You shifted in his lap and he had to bite his lip to stop himself from groaning. Oh, you damn tease.
"I'm filthy and tired after work sweetheart. You wouldn't want me."
You frowned, going from slightly annoyed to full blown angry.
"I always want you, you idiot. I'm not scared of a few stains. I like it when you come home smelling like the workshop. I like it when you're dirty from work." You tugged at his collar. "I like you. Why don't you get that?"
'Because you're too good for me.' He almost said it. It was on the tip of his tongue and it was only some dull instinct that kept him quiet. How couldn't you see it? You were everything he wasn't. You were educated and kind and selfless. He was just some bastard from the wrong side of the tracks.
He wanted to impress you. He wanted to be worthy of you. Fixing up the Mustang was just the start of it. He didn't care that it took him all summer and pretty much all of his pay cheque to do. He wanted a ride that he would be proud to pick you up in.
And it still didn't feel like enough. Nothing ever felt like enough.
He looked away from you and stayed silent.
You sighed and brought your palms up to his cheeks, gently turned his face back to yours. "I like you. I'm dating you. I want to spend time with you, no matter how grouchy you are. Okay?"
He should be a gentleman and let you go, shouldn't take advantage of your kindness. He should be a good man.
"Okay," he said and leaned forward to kiss you.
He wasn't a good man. He wasn't a gentleman. He was going to hold onto you for as long as he could.
Colt woke up with a snarl, slamming his fist on his alarm so hard the clock face cracked.
"I didn't want it to end, goddammit."
He rubbed his hand over his face. The dream felt so real. He could feel the late fall chill, could smell your shampoo and taste your cherry lip gloss. He wanted to go right back to sleep and fall back into that wonderful fantasy.
He scowled and threw the covers off. Dreams could wait, work couldn't.
All through the day he was snappish and irritable. One of the apprentices messed up an order and he snarled at them to stop being so fucking useless and fix it. His coworkers shot each other looks behind his back. He was behaving entirely out of character but both him and his buddies were helpless to stop it. It was only when he got home at the end of his shift that he realised why.
He wanted to dream about you again.
There wasn't any guarantee that he would. Dreams weren't exactly scheduled network programming. But somehow he knew it would happen.
He ended up going to bed before eight, a world record for someone who usually only considered sleeping when it was well past midnight.
He was right. He did dream of you.
You were in a bikini this time, lounging on a lawn chair in the backyard. You had sunglasses on and there was a slight sheen of baby oil on your skin. Your phone was on shuffle and pop music was blaring from the speakers.
You weren't expecting him and he kept his steps real quiet as he approached you. He kept expecting you to hear him and shoot up, and he was slightly annoyed when you didn't. What if he was a serial killer or some sick pervert, sneaking up on you while you were so vulnerable? Did you have no spatial awareness?
He made it all the way to the back of your chair and you were still totally oblivious. There was a magazine and a glass of ice tea on a small table next to you. You were softly humming along to the music.
He took a minute to just admire you. Your body stretched out and entirely at his mercy. His girl, his gorgeous girl.
He leaned down until his lips were right next to your ear.
"Hey there sugar. You miss me?"
You shot up with a shriek, your sunglasses flying. You whirled on him, grabbing your magazine like thirty pages of glossy Cosmo was going to help you fight off an attacker.
Your eyes narrowed when you recognised him and you smacked his chest, hard.
"You asshole! You gave me a heart attack!"
He couldn't help but smirk at the sight of you so riled up.
"You're lucky it was me and not someone else. Not everyone has such noble intentions."
"Yeah right. Was it your noble intention to scare the living daylights out of me?"
He held up his palms in a placating gesture. "Just teachin' you a lesson sweetheart. I was standing there for a good few minutes and you didn't notice a damn thing."
He cast a critical eye across your backyard. "I reckon some high wooden fencing would do the trick. 'Bout seven feet high, sunken flowerbeds on either side like trenches to make it even harder to get a leg up."
"I don't want a fence."
He ignored you, already mentally calculating how much lumber he'd need. "A nice light coloured wood. Pine maybe. Will match your house much better."
You sat back down, the fight draining out of you as your adrenaline dissipated. "What are you doing here? Did you get off work early?"
He narrowed his eyes but you didn't seem to notice. "Why? Don't want me around?"
That shocked you enough that you twisted around in your chair to look at him.
"Of course I want you around! Don't ever imply otherwise. This is a lovely surprise." You paused. "Near heart attack aside of course."
It was funny how easily you could calm him down. One sentence was all it took to get him smiling again. He leaned forward and hooked one finger under the strap of your bikini top.
"I haven't seen this one before. New?"
You blushed and looked down. "Mm-hmm."
"It's cute. But..."
You glanced up at him, suddenly self conscious. "But what?"
He grinned wolfishly. "But...you would look so much better without it."
He tugged at the bow holding your top up. The strings unravelled and fell down your back. The bra cups started to slip down too, and his eyes were glued to their steady fall.
He was going to teach you a whole 'nother lesson about wearing such a skimpy outfit where anyone could see you. Show you exactly what sick, twisted bastards would do to your body. Teach you a lesson you won't forget, so maybe, just maybe... you'd learn to be more cautious around men like him.
Colt woke up with a hunger like death. His cock so hard it was actually throbbing. He didn't feel well rested, despite having slept more than he had in two weeks.
It played over and over again in his mind. The strings unravelling, your bikini top sliding off... Always stopping right at the good part, the part he most wanted to see.
He got ready for the day with a savage efficiency. Bolting back his protein shake without even tasting it. He didn't realise it, but he'd started counting down the days until he could see you again. Just two more days. Two more nights of dreams and then you'd be there in the flesh and he could finally - finally what? He shook his head to clear away the dirty thoughts that were crowding him.
He was being a real bastard. Thinking about you, dreaming about you, when he had no right to. You hadn't shown any romantic or physical interest in him. You were clearly still grieving your man. He needed to get himself under control - what you needed in your life was a friend, not another man to obsess over you.
He forced himself to take a cold shower. Forced himself to avoid thinking about you. And to especially avoid thinking about the you from his dream.
'Good luck with that buddy. I used to be so tired I was falling asleep on my feet and I still couldn't get her out of my head.'
Work was thankfully busy that day and he threw himself into it with every feverish ounce of energy he had. Whenever his thoughts wandered towards you, he would find something else to do. He didn't eat anything at all and he didn't even notice getting hungry. He took on an extra shift and finished long after the sun went down, his muscles a hurting mess and his head not much better.
Christine was the last car left in the parking lot, sitting under a streetlight like she was waiting for him. He found his steps unintentionally getting slower the closer he came to her.
In the dark and lonely emptiness of the parking lot, she didn't feel like a normal car. If anything, she seemed to be watching him. Her headlights like eyes and her grille a silvery gash of a smile.
If he had to guess, he'd say the car was almost unhappy with him.
"Because I'm thinking about her?" He asked as he climbed behind the wheel. Immediately, he felt stupid and superstitious for talking out loud.
'Because you aren't thinking about her.'
He'd driven Christine to work the last few days despite not wanting to cause unnecessary wear and tear. Being in the car, driving it, was still a thrill.
Not tonight though.
He felt on edge, wanting to get out as soon as possible. She purred to life with the same thrumming power as always but his throat was tight with a nervousness he couldn't explain.
The inside of the car was suffocatingly quiet. He turned on the radio and old school rock 'n roll poured out.
'Just the sort of thing her boyfriend used to listen to,' he thought to himself. And then he laughed a stuttering, barking sort of laugh because there was no logical way he could have known that.
'Take it easy big guy. You and I are just gonna cruise. That's all.'
A nice cruise. Yeah, that sounded good. Calm his nerves, get rid of the nameless dread that was building all day. He relaxed into his seat, the streetlights crawling past in a hypnotic line of bright and dark.
He didn't notice when the radio dial moved on its own and the station changed from rock 'n roll to country. The singer sounded awfully familiar. His voice a kind of husky rasp. He was singing about his girl, his pretty woman, and he was singing about the grave and he was singing about the dark that waited.
'Oh,' he thought to himself dully, 'That's the voice I keep hearing in my dreams.'
When he finally reached home, it was two in the morning and the petrol gauge showed an empty tank. He'd somehow driven enough to eat through a full tank of gas. A drive that should have taken twenty minutes took five hours.
He got out of the car on legs that felt numb and cold. He couldn't remember driving. He couldn't remember the strange music or the even stranger passenger that rode with him. In his mind, there existed the clear cut memory of leaving work and climbing into Christine. Then there was nothing but a long, grey blankness that was tinged with a muted terror.
He collapsed into bed still in his work clothes. By morning, his mind would have stitched over all those things too terrible to contemplate. He would wake up feeling groggy and confused, and probably put it down to the strain of a long day.
Colt slept after driving with the dead and didn't dream.
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On the day before your date, he found an engagement ring under the passenger side carpet.
He had no reason to look there, no reason to pull the carpet up by its seams. But he did it anyway and his reward was a silver and diamond band with blood dried in the crevices. There was an engraving on the inside and he had to take it out into the sun to try and read it.
'Mine. Forever and always.'
He shivered despite standing in the bright midmorming sun. Most rings would say 'yours' instead of 'mine.' He had no doubt that the change was entirely intentional. Your boyfriend was staking his claim on you - not just with the ring but with the intention behind it.
He looked at the brownish red stains and knew in his heart they were blood. Your boyfriend's blood.
Colt didn't know how the man died, but looking at the ring, he felt sure that it was bloody and far from natural. How would a blood stained ring end up in Christine? If the guy had been in accident sure. But the car was in perfect condition. The ring shouldn't have been there.
Unless he was murdered. Soaked in blood and tossed around during the struggle, the ring probably got pushed under the seam of the carpet. It was a sealed off spot and even a forensics team might miss something that small.
It was an outlandish and macabre theory to be basing entirely off one mysterious engagement ring. If he stopped to think about it, he would no doubt be able to poke a dozen separate holes into his theory.
Somehow, he knew it was true. The same way he suddenly knew Christine wasn't just an ordinary car and that his dreams about you were far from natural.
He felt a queer prickling all across his nape. He wasn't the type to scare easily, but this... This frightened him. He didn't feel alone anymore. He felt like if he looked up at the rear view mirror, he'd see someone in the back seat. No, not just someone. He'd see the dead man who owned the car before him.
He'd see the man who wanted to marry you.
He sucked in a sharp breath and forced himself to let it out slowly. He wasn't a superstitious man. He didn't let fancies of ghosts and ghouls affect him. But even he couldn't deny the way he felt. His gut was telling him something was terribly, terribly wrong.
He climbed out of Christine like a man scared of waking a sleeping bear. He didn't even bother to grab the keys.
He couldn't explain any of it. Not the dreams, not the thoughts that felt like someone else, not the prickling certainty that a man died right where he'd been sitting.
He got into his his Jeep and pulled out of the driveway, his eyes on Christine the entire time. Like she'd somehow roar to life and slam into him.
He didn't know where he was driving to until he parked. A bar across town, a real rough spot that on most days even he wouldn't want to stop at. But today wasn't like most days.
The place was dark and the folk sitting around weren't exactly the friendly sort. He settled at the bar and ordered a tequila without really thinking about it.
Funny. He used to hate tequila.
It went down like fire, and he shuddered. He wanted to laugh. What else was a mam supposed to drink when the world didn't make a lick of sense anymore?
"Give me another one." His voice was raspier somehow. Even though that never happened when he drank vodka or whiskey.
There were mirrored shelves opposite him and he caught sight of his eyes. A pale green. He tossed back his second shot and tried to tell himself it was just a trick of the light.
He wasn't sure who to talk to. Not the Sheriff's Office. Yeah officer, there was a man murdered in my car and now I can't stop dreaming about his girlfriend didn't exactly scream unimpeachable sobriety.
And not the pastor either. Father, I'm being haunted by filthy thoughts and I'm not sure if they're my own. He doubted the old man at his mother's church was qualified to deal with that sort of thing.
But he couldn't keep quiet either. He had to tell someone about it. If they called him crazy at least it was an acknowledgement. At least it was better than being dead drunk and being scared of his own eyes in the mirror.
Who could possibly know anything about it? Oh. Of course.
He fumbled his phone out of his pocket and almost threw it across the room when it wouldn't turn on. He charged it every night, goddammit.
"There a pay phone somewhere 'round here?" he asked the bartender.
The man jerked his face at the side door that lead to the back parking lot. Colt stumbled out - swaying on his feet far worse than two drinks should warrant.
It was late afternoon. He shaded his eyes and tried looked at the sun like it was deliberately lying to him. He arrived at midday and he couldn't have been in there for more than twenty minutes. How the hell was it this late?
'Time moves differently when you're dead cowboy. You should know that by now.'
The payphone was in the shadow of the bar and he shivered when he stepped out of the sun. Wrong. It was all wrong and he didn't know how to fix it. Why was the voice still in his head when Christine was all the way across town? Why did he still feel life he wasn't quiet alone?
It was only when he had the receiver up against his ear that he realised he didn't know your number. Shit.
He leaned his forearm against the payphone and rested his forehead against it. Could he maybe get a taxi and show up at your house? He scoffed. Yeah, that would go well. Showing up dead drunk just to say he knew you liked short skirts in fall and that he dreamed of pulling off your bikini top. He'd be lucky if you only mildly tazed him.
Fuck. Okay. Home again. Sleep it off. Charge his phone. Call you in the morning and try not to sound too crazy. He could manage that.
He called the taxi company listed in the phone book. Half wondering if they were still in operation. When it finally connected, the call was thick with static.
"Yeah?" The man's voice was raspy and standoffish.
"Can I get a cab at Ronnie's on Westside?"
The man laughed. "Oh you must be a real tough customer to be drinking there. Didn't think you'd have the balls cowboy."
Colt wanted to cuss him out. What kind of fucker answers the phone and insults you less than two sentences in? He squeezed the receiver until he felt he could control his voice.
"Yeah. I'm a real mean guy. So can I get my cab or not?"
"Oh, I'll send you a ride alright." There was a mocking tilt to his voice. "Best fucking ride you'll ever take. Just sit pretty. You'll know when it's for you."
The skin on the back of his neck crawled. He hung up without another word.
The streetlights were coming on and the gold of sunset was giving way to the awful in-between greyness of twilight. He waited for his ride.
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You came home to find flowers on your doorstep. A bouquet of white roses. You froze. There was only one man who sent you flowers and he was cold and dead for the better part of a year.
You picked the card up by the edge and flicked it open.
Hope you didn't forget our date. See you soon dollface.
-Colt
Oh. You laughed, ridiculously relieved. Of course.
Dinner tomorrow night with the cowboy. You took the roses inside and hunted around for a vase. Was it actually a date? He'd said it was a thank you dinner, but it wouldn't hurt to dress up a little. Do your makeup a bit fancy, maybe wear your new heels. It'd been months since you'd gone out, had a nice dinner with a friend. This could be good for you. Just one more step back into normalcy.
The clouds were starting to gather and as evening came on, they broke with a shudder of thunder.
You curled up on your couch, all the lights on. It was going to be a bad storm. The first really awful one in almost half a year. You tried not to, but it got you thinking about that night. The night your boyfriend proposed to you. The night you killed him.
You closed your eyes and tried not to see it, but the memories followed you even past the darkness. You couldn't run from them for long.
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It was cold outside, rain drumming on Christine's roof. Sharp, constant. Your boyfriend was in the driver's seat, buckling his belt. A lazy, satisfied smirk on his face.
You liked it when he looked at you like that. Satisfied. Mellow. It never lasted long, but in the few minutes after fucking you, he would agree to just about anything.
"I'm drunk on you baby," he'd said once. "Heads all woozy. Would do anything for you. Fucking anything."
Christine's windows were all fogged up, and you traced little hearts on the glass. To be honest, you felt a little drunk on him too. Heart still pounding, head reeling. Cunt still fluttering and full. He was so good at reading you, at fucking you just how you needed it. No man before him could make you come so hard, or do it so easy.
"I got something to ask you, baby."
You turned to him, hand reaching out for his and pulling it into your lap.
"Yes?"
He rubbed a thumb across your knuckles. He wasn't looking at your face, just down at your interlinked hands.
"You're my girl, yeah?"
"Obviously. I love you."
"And you ain't going to leave me?"
"Never."
He sighed. Managed to raise his eyes to meet yours. You weren't used to seeing him nervous. Usually he'd just bull doze his way through a conversation, not stopping until he got what he wanted. This was...new. It made a whole new crop of butterflies start up in your stomach.
"Will you marry me?"
You froze. What? Where was this coming from? You loved him. You cared about him. But marriage? That was such a big step. Such a grown up thing.
"I've got money put away. And Christine. I can put a deposit down on a house by the end of the month. Can pay for a nice wedding too. All white and frilly, like you want."
"I..."
"You don't got to worry 'bout your student loans neither. We can pay 'em off a whole lot faster if we're together. You can even go back to school if you want. Get that second degree you're always talking about."
"I...can't."
You pulled your hands away from his. Looked away from him.
"I love you. I really do. But it's too...much. We're too young. I... I just don't want to rush into things and make a mistake."
He was quiet. Awfully, dangerously quiet. His hand was still in your lap and you could feel when he clenched it into a fist.
"Is there another man?"
"What?"
You whirled to face him, suddenly angry. How could he even suggest...
"I haven't touched another man since the day you asked me out."
He wasn't smiling anymore. His green eyes were narrowed, mean.
"Who are you fucking? Which bastard is it? Huh?"
"No one! There's no one else. I just don't want to get married and make a -"
"Mistake? You think I'm a fucking mistake?"
You flinched. His voice was even louder in the closeness of the car. It made your ears throb.
His fist uncurled and he grabbed your hand, hard. Yanked you towards him so your upper body was sprawled across the gear shift.
"Was it a mistake to fuck me? A mistake to say you loved me?"
"No! That's not what I-"
He cut you off with a hand around your throat.
"You want to leave me. That it? You're going to fucking leave me?"
You pulled at his fingers with your free hand but it was useless. His grip was getting tighter the angrier he got. Your head felt all swollen, your nose and throat burning.
"Please just -"
"No! No fucking please. No changing your mind at the last minute. You ain't gonna be my girl? Ain't gonna be my wife?"
He pulled you towards his face, his lips barely brushing yours.
"If you won't be mine, then you'll just have to fucking die. It's me or no one else, baby. I told you that, all those months ago."
You scrambled for some way to get loose, but you were in an awkward position and he had all the leverage.
"I fucking warned you. I told you that if you dated me you couldn't ever leave. I knew I was going to fall in love with you. Hell, I was half in love before you even said hello. I tried. But you just didn't listen, did you?"
Your hand brushed something cold and metallic in the centre console. His switch blade. He usually kept it in his back pocket to help with work. Oh, and he kept it sharp. You grabbed it, more on instinct than anything else.
Your head was pounding and your heartbeat was pulsing in your ears. But the rain was somehow worse. Falling so loud you thought you'd never get the sound out of your head.
You tried to plead with him again, reason, beg, whatever it took. But when you tried to speak he just closed his fist even tighter and your words died in your throat with a shudder.
Oh god, he was really going to do it. He's eyes were wild, mad with something beyond reason. He'd seen reason in the rearview mirror about a hundred miles ago and now he was headed straight down the highway of fucking insanity.
How? How could the man you loved be choking the breath out of you?
Because he loves you. Because he'd rather see you dead than lose you. Because you were too damn blind with love to notice how dangerous he is.
White starbursts bloomed across your vision. Little fireworks to celebrate your brain dying.
You stabbed him.
You didn't fully mean to. You were half mad with fear, half dead in his grip. Not sure what you were doing until you felt the blood.
The switchblade sunk straight into his neck.
You didn't even pull it out. Just left it there and scrambled back when his grip on you loosened, your chest heaving. You throat and eyes and nose all felt swollen. Your lungs burned like fire.
He reached up and touched his neck. Looked down at his fingers like he couldn't believe the blood was his.
You might have tried to save him then. Might have come to your senses and called the ambulance, might have stripped off your shirt and tried to stop the bleeding.
But a knife in his throat apparently wasn't enough to stop him. He looked at you and there wasn't anything rational left in him. He reached for you again, hands curled like claws. He was dying and all he wanted to do was take you with him.
You screamed. So loud that it made your own ears ring.
You grabbed the knife and pulled. You didn't realise it was acting like a stopper until his blood splashed on you. Hot, stinking of metal. It sprayed across your face, got into your mouth and nose, soaked the whole front of your shirt.
You scrambled for the door handle and fell backwards out of the Mustang. Landed on your ass and pushed yourself away.
He was halfway over the passenger seat by then, hands still reaching, mouth pulled into an ugly snarl.
You kicked the door shut.
It slammed with a bang and mercifully blocked him from view. Your turned onto your knees, pushed yourself to your feet and ran.
The rain was coming down so fast that it stung your skin. You didn't rightly know where you were going. Only that it was away.
You still don't know how you made it home. You were a twenty minute drive away and it was too dark to see more than three feet in front of you. Must have been luck. Must have been fate.
When you got home, you were shaking so hard you couldn't even open the door for a good five minutes.
You stripped off your clothes right there on the doorstep and threw them in the trash. Switch blade too. You don't know how you managed to hold onto it during that wild, reckless run.
You took a long shower. Sat under the hot water with your knees curled to your chest. Too scared to cry.
At some point, the better part of your brain must have taken over. You vaguely remember burning the bloodstained clothes. Remember taking a drive and throwing the bleached switchblade out the window.
And when the call came a few days later, to please come down and identify a body, you were calm enough to not give yourself away.
If it was anyone else, maybe the cops would have tried harder. But your boyfriend was a rough man from the rough side of town. They gave you looks of sympathy but shook their heads behind your back.
Guy like him had it coming.
When it was all said and done, you and Christine were the only ones who knew the truth.
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Colt waited all evening for a cab that never came. And when the storm started, he was annoyed enough to consider driving home on his own. He'd only had two shots. And that was a few hours ago. He'd be fine. Folk got away with worse all the time.
He left the bar with his jacket over his head and his eyes darting down the road. The rain was sheeting and he had to scramble to make it to his Jeep without getting totally soaked.
Wet and hungry and still a little drunk, Christine didn't seem like quite so big an issue. He was just jumping at ghosts. Tequila got his thoughts all twisted up, that's all.
Driving was miserable. Even with his headlights on bright and his wipers cranked all the way up, he was having real trouble seeing the road. The yellow line was the only thing he could properly rely on.
When the headlights showed up behind him, it took him a while to notice them getting closer.
"Guy's got a death wish, driving so fast in this weather."
The driver behind him was gaining quickly. Colt expected them to try and overtake, but they didn't. Just got closer and closer. A car's length away. And then half. And then almost kissing his bumper.
"Why is this dude so up my ass?"
He hit the gas, but the guy behind him didn't care. Just picked up and kept coming. Revved it a little and Colt could hear the engine even through the rain. Some kind of muscle car. A loud, growling thing.
Almost like a...Mustang.
His whole back suddenly felt icy. It couldn't be. Christine was back home, keys still in the ignition. Even if someone did steal her, why the fuck would they track him down? Must be another muscle car, with some ego tripping asshole behind the wheel.
He told himself all that and more, but his foot pressed harder on the gas.
And still the Mustang kept coming.
The speedometer crept upwards. Sixty. Seventy. Eighty.
Too fast for the narrow roads, and sure as hell too fast for a rainy night like this one.
A curve was coming up soon, the road ringed off with guard rails. He could see the reflectors glinting orange at him. Shit.
He took it wide, drifting into the opposite lane. He could feel his tires slipping a little and he hit the breaks just enough to steady the Jeep.
The Mustang didn't have any trouble with the curve. Stayed in its lane and gained a little more speed, so that when they were straight again, its hood was in line with his trunk.
Good. Maybe now the fucker would finally overtake him.
He couldn't see the car clearly. The headlights were bouncing right off his side mirrors. He couldn't even make out the silhouette of the driver.
Screech.
The Mustang's hood scraped against the side of his Jeep. The whole car lurched to the side, tires slipping.
"Fuck!"
Colt gunned it again, trying to out race the mad man. But whoever was behind him had no intention of letting that happen. They kept pace with him, blocking him from getting back in his lane.
Lightning flashed and Colt looked in the mirror just in time to see the car properly.
The thunder was loud enough to drown out his scream.
The car trying to run him off the road was none other than the 1969 cherry red Mustang that should have been sitting in his yard. Maybe he could have accepted it as a coincidence. Someone else had the exact same car as him and just happened to be driving like an asshole. Maybe he could have accepted that.
But the car didn't have a driver.
He saw it clear as day. The lightning glared straight through all the windows and there wasn't a single person in that car.
Impossible. This can't be real. There's no fucking way.
He could almost hear the laugh.
'Do I got you scared cowboy?'
Colt didn't have time to answer. The road was merging into the cliffside, and the wall of rock kept him trapped. There were lights coming straight at him, the blaring of a horn as whoever it was tried to warn him.
He slammed hard on the brakes. Christine shot ahead and at the last second he managed to edge back into his lane. The headlights roared past, the huge semi exhaling a spray of water and smoke.
It would have flattened him, even in his Jeep.
Christine's tail lights were a pair of glaring red eyes in the rain, until suddenly they weren't. Gone.
Colt slowed the Jeep, parked on the shoulder.
The rain was drumming on the roof and his hands were shaking. He got out of the car, water soaking through his shirt almost immediately.
The paint on the back door was scratched off in huge swathes. The metal was dented.
He climbed back behind the wheel, mind teetering on the edge of something past sanity. The world wasn't sane anymore. Nothing was.
He heard the growl of the Mustang through the rain. No headlights this time, just the whine of tires on slick tar.
Where?! Where was she?!
Christine slammed into the Jeep head on. All Colt saw was her red face and silver smile in the glare of his headlights before his whole world was filled with the grinding of steel on steel. His head slammed backwards, the whole car shuddering.
The airbags came on, blinding him.
Christine didn't stop after hitting him. He yanked the hand break up but she kept pushing forward, edging his car closer and closer to the edge. He felt it when the guard rail scratched against his bumper.
An ugly scream of metal, but the rails held. Christine didn't seem to like that. She pulled back, her tires shrieking as she got ready to slam forward again.
Colt jumped just before she hit the Jeep. His seat belt was almost the death of him. It wouldn't release and he couldn't see the catch in the dark. He must have had at least one lucky star though, because the door wasn't too mangled and he managed to kick it open just in time.
He landed hard, on his hands and knees.
Metal shrieked. Christine slammed into the Jeep hard enough to send it through the rails. He turned just in time to see his car go tilting off the road and down into the dark.
For a second, he thought he might have made it. Maybe she didn't notice him. Maybe it was all over.
Christine pulled back and her headlights washed over him, still on his hands and knees. One of the lights was hanging loose from the crash, making her look lopsided. The rain was still coming down hard and the droplets were gold in the light between them.
She revved.
Colt scrambled to his feet and ran straight for the guard rail. He jumped.
It wasn't a sheer drop. It was instead a steep slope, thick with shale and slippery with water. His knees buckled under him and he ended up on his back, half rolling and half sliding down the embankment. His palms were bleeding and as he fell, the gravel lodged itself in his open skin.
He couldn't see where he was headed. Could only try and and protect his head and brace for impact.
His slide ended with a boulder. He slammed into it his ribs first. Heard a crack before all the air was knocked straight out of him.
He could see the headlights way up above him, cutting through the rain.
At least she can't follow me down here.
True. Christine couldn't follow him.
But that's when Colt saw him. The driver. Coming to stand in front of the headlights, the silhouette of a man.
The silhouette stepped through the gash in the railing left by the Jeep and dropped out of the light.
Colt knew he should run. He could hear the shale slipping as the other man came down. Controlled. Measured. Nothing like his own tumble.
But he couldn't move. Everything hurt. Breathing sent sharp spikes of pain all across his chest.
"Well, well cowboy. Look at you."
The voice was low and raspy, mean. He knew that voice. Had been hearing it in his head and in his dreams and was fool enough to think it was his own.
His eyes were getting used to the dark. He could just about see the stranger. Tall, wearing jeans and a leather jacket. There was dirt thick on his boots, in the folds of his clothes. Not the black shale of the slope, but a reddish clay.
Kind of like in the cemetery.
No, he realised as the stranger squated down in front of him. Exactly like the cemetery. It was grave dirt he was seeing.
He was looking at a dead man.
The stranger might have been handsome once, but now one cheek was filled with holes. Ugly, clustered together things that showed his teeth. His other cheek was a mass of white. Worms, tiny little worms wriggling in and out of his face.
Colt wanted to scream. And vomit. And then scream some more.
There was a dark hole in the stranger's neck and when he moved it oozed a sticky, thick kind of blood.
"You know why I'm here?"
Colt didn't really notice it at first, but his voice was different. Thicker somehow. Like his vocal cords were packed full of dirt and blood.
Colt coughed and his whole chest hurt so bad he thought he was dying. Something was definitely broken. He'd be lucky if there wasn't internal bleeding too.
"Let me guess. Came to punish me for my sins?"
The dead man laughed.
"Not yours, no. Don't give much of a damn about you. I'm here to get what's mine."
The pieces were clicking together in his head.
"Your girl."
"My girl," your boyfriend agreed.
He reached for him, the nails on his hand either blue or totally ripped off. His skin filled with holes that showed pale white tendons and ugly pink flesh.
That was when the adrenaline really kicked in. Colt shoved at the man with one hand and pushed himself up with the other. It was like touching a carcass at the butcher. Cold. Limp. Just a piece of meat. No human should ever have to feel a body in that state.
He made it to his knees before the bastard hit back. Your boyfriend kicked straight at his jaw and Colt's head flew backward, smashed into the rock behind him. He dropped back down like a stone.
"Why you gotta be so fucking difficult, hmm?"
Colt was too out of it to pull away. The man reached for him and the skin of his hand was crawling with bugs. He grabbed his collar and dragged him up.
"Just gonna go to sleep for a little while cowboy. Maybe you'll wake up. Maybe you won't. Either way, I've waited too fucking long to let this chance go."
The corpse kissed him. Or more accurately, pressed his open lips against his and breathed.
His lips were cold and stiff and utterly beyond human. The taste was rancid. Worse than the worst thing he'd ever had. Metallic like blood, sweet like rotted meat.
Colt fainted.
The rain drummed down. Christine sat on the roadside and waited, her hood and paintwork back to normal. In bed, you tossed and turned in the hands of a nightmare.
The thing that was Colt Guilder opened its eyes.
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It was your phone that woke you up. Your ringtone blasting even through your dreams.
You fumbled for it, eyes squinted against the brightness.
"Hello?"
The call was thick with static. Still, you recognised the voice. Would know it even from beyond the grave.
"Hey beautiful. Did ya miss me?" 
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tacharie · 7 days ago
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Friendly Marriage Platonic!Reo Mikage x Fem!reader
— You and Reo have quite a few things in common. For starters, you were both born into influential, wealthy families. You were both expected to carry on your family legacy and marry someone of equal status. And you were both...gay. Unfortunately, that wasn't exactly accepted in either of your households, so you both come up with a solution. Just marry each other!
SMAU || Comedy/Fluff || Platonic (Reo & reader are best friends) || Implied NagiReo || Lavender marriage || Might be OOC </3
< Masterlist > < PT 2 >
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Author’s Note
I don’t usually like smaus but this idea came to mind since I feel like there isn't enough platonic stuff for blue lock 😭 (Also to help cope after chapter 306...)
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tacharie · 7 days ago
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conspiracies & cleats ༄.°
a blue lock! smau miniseries part 1;
starring: isagi yoichi, bachira meguru, rin itoshi, kunigami rensuke, chigiri hyoma, mikage reo, nagi seishiro
synopsis: in which isagi finds your insane blue lock conspiracy account on twitter—gets brainwashed—and now everyone thinks he’s losing it.
a/n: trying my first attempt at doing smaus! i'll see if i continue making these stuff, let me know your thoughts! comment down below if you wanna join the taglist! this plot was suggested from this request! part 2 here!
warning: crackfic, suggestive jokes, brain-rotting theories, cursing, ego slander (and thirsting), reader is a menace
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isagi didn’t mean to find it. he was just searching his name. normal stuff. totally normal.
but then it popped up. a thread.
the display name: @conspirabaddie.
“blue lock is a military psyop.”
isagi blinked. he read the whole thread. twice. he told himself it was stupid. then read three more threads. bookmarked them.
for the next 3 days, he lurked. no likes. no replies. just him, in the dark at 3am, reading the whole thread again and again.
the worst part?
some of it made sense.
like, real sense.
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isagi sits in bed, phone screen glowing, eyes locked on a thread he’s read six times already. then stumbles on a tweet someone replied to with:
“WHY DID YOU TEXT ME THIS AT 3AM 😭😭 ur insane”
and right there in the screenshot… is a notification preview.
your number. uncensored. probably by accident.
he stares at it, blinking.
“wait… that’s them?”
he debates it for a second. then another second.
then, in the most awkward, dorky moment of his life, he opens his phone.
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ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤdedicated to @airi momoi anon
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ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ© sevarchive ✦ masterlist
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tacharie · 7 days ago
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Kaisyn and nagi inspired by this chapter of smu! au credits/inspired by: @neeeooon
(yn is in kaiser's hoodie, based off of his robe in the manga/anime)
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I had the thought of nagi crashing a Kaisyn date night/yn invites all her friends over and kaiser has to share a bed with them bc nagi gets best friend privilege :x
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tacharie · 8 days ago
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this was funnier in my head
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tacharie · 8 days ago
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Don't Believe Me
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈· · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · ·┈┈┈┈
There's not much time left.
It's not like we never try any means we could ever think of. I mean, sure, some of them have left me with the lowest impression of ever caring about my curse, and some of them did what they could, but their efforts have never been enough.
And to be honest, I'm too tired.
The Kyklos's curse soon will take over my body, taking my mind as its nourishment for its root, blooming who-knows-what kind of anomaly flower.
Will I become a mindless anomaly, a Kyklos?
Could I even recognize the other ghouls when the curse takes hold?
Will I launch an attack on whatever I see?
.
.
.
We'll be together soon.
Ulp—!!! I almost threw up for reminding me of the sensation in my shoulder at that moment. My limbs go weak at the mere thought that I'm going to be the same as that one creature.
The spiral under my skin pulses. Not in pain. In hunger.
Every time I close my eyes, I see the bloom. Not metaphorically; I see it. A thousand writhing petals of bone and thought twist through my spine. They feel like roots trying to change me from the inside out.
I don't tell anyone anymore. They’ve stopped asking. It’s easier for them, I guess, to pretend I’m still on the right side of the glass.
“Hey, don’t faint on us now,” came a familiar, gruff voice. The latch of a medical case clicked open as Yuri stepped into my room.
The sound of his medical case latching open brought a strange comfort. Familiar. Almost routine by now.
Jiro trailed in behind him, clipboard already out. Eyes scanning, distant as ever. But not indifferent. Never indifferent.
Yuri frowned at the monitor. “Vitals holding steady. Strange. Honestly, with your last flare, I expected to find a lot more degradation today.”
“Not disappointed, are you?” I asked in a faint voice while forcing a smile.
Yuri glanced at me with a snorting laugh. “On the contrary, you’re giving me whiplash. First you spiral, then you stabilize. If I didn’t know better, I’d call it spite-based healing.”
I laughed too—short, bitter.
Jiro came closer and held out a small patch for my arm. Cold, sterile fingers brushed my skin, more gentle than they looked.
I flinched when the patch touched my skin. My nerves have started to fray lately—literally, maybe. The last scan showed root-like black threads in my shoulder joint. Yuri called them pre-bloom filaments. Said it like it was fascinating.
“You’ve been quiet,” Yuri said, glancing at the monitor. “No new auditory episodes? No visual distortions?”
“No nightmares, no psychotic breaks, and no sleep paralysis,” I said, lying flat at that moment. “I know the list.”
“Good memory. That means the frontal cortex is still holding.”
Then Yuri muttered, “Alright, I need to log this and push the data to the upper high.”
"To Darkwick?"
"Of course," Yuri said without looking at me, flicking his holo-tablet open. "They monitor all treatment logs. They get everything. You know the protocol.”
Then Jiro spoke, without looking up, “Even the unapproved ones.”
The air in the room thickened. My skin prickled.
“…Unapproved?” I asked, voice tighter now. “What do you mean by that?”
Yuri hesitated. “Some of the more experimental treatments. They didn’t pass central review. Darkwick flagged them as too… unstable.”
“Unstable for whom?”
Neither answered.
I sat up straighter, blood pounding. “You tried something. You wanted to do more. But they stopped you.”
Jiro didn’t speak, he just adjusted his gloves. But his silence wasn’t empty — it was heavy. Full of words he wouldn’t say. Couldn’t say.
Yuri sighed and muttered, “They said the risk was too high. That it might ‘destabilize anomaly growth’.”
Anomaly growth.
I stared at them and I felt it. That shift. That cold knot in my gut uncoiling as a sudden terrifying thought formed inside my head. They weren’t stopping treatment because it might hurt me.
They were stopping it because it might prevent the curse from blooming.
Suddenly, the pieces fit—too well. The gentle stalling. The false hope. The way every single move Yuri and Jiro made had to be passed through someone else’s judgment.
Not for my sake.
But to keep me viable.
They’re not waiting to save me. They’re waiting to watch me turn.
My mouth went dry. My chest hollowed.
And yet… I didn’t feel betrayed by them. Not exactly.
It was worse than that.
I felt played and pitied.
Like they were trying to save a bird with a broken wing, knowing full well that someone else was already setting up the cage.
In that moment, all my hope — the small flickering ember that hinted at a different ending — faded away. I knew, deep down, all this time. But thought about it in raw—no sedation, no sugar-coating, no hopeful lies...
It scraped something out of me that I didn’t know could still bleed.
Because it didn’t matter how hard Yuri tried.
It didn’t matter how quiet Jiro’s care was.
They were working under a ceiling of glass, and I was the experiment pressed against it.
For Darkwick, this isn’t a tragedy.
It’s a countdown.
To the bloom, to Kyklos. To me—as something else.
“Tell me something,” I whispered as I felt some tears that I didn’t realize I still had, burning behind my eyes... “What happens after I change?”
Yuri finally stopped moving. The light from his tablet flickered against his face. His jaw clenched.
“I don’t know,” he said. “That’s… not in our clearance.”
Jiro turned away.
I looked at them both. They weren’t lying, and that made it worse. They want to help me.
But they may already be too late.
I am a countdown now.
No name. No file. No history. Just a transformation waiting for the right moment to happen, so they can write it down and call it science, a discovery that was only meant to be research but was not given a shred of sympathy.
And I throw up for real now.
⊹ ࣪ ﹏𓊝﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪ ˖ .fin
Early warning : Tbh, I'm still not finished all the episode to the latest update so I actually have little information while making this (please forgive me if there's any OOC, have mercy). All I ever make mostly inspired based on what people posting so I always link their post in my credit. Word count: 1189.
#credits; seeing this post, I've been inspired.
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tacharie · 9 days ago
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YURIFICATION BEAM!!!!
finally got something done,,,, my glasses should arrive in 2 weeks
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tacharie · 16 days ago
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tacharie · 16 days ago
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hesso fuckinv CUTE
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I need everyone to die
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tacharie · 17 days ago
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Mamagrotto and every small babyzul
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