#&. ‛ i will avenge my ghosts with every breath i take.︐ › clare cousland.

[mercyburned]

i'm replaying the dragon age series in anticipation of the new game, and it's got me thinking... while i originally really liked clare with a.listair, i'm not sure that relationship fully fits her anymore.

the person clare has become has grown in the past 14 years and her development has shifted profoundly from when i first made her on my first playthrough ( after a really terrible breakup lmao, good riddance dude ). she's a lot more withdrawn in private than i originally thought, and she's so single-minded when it comes to her duties as a warden that i think anyone pursuing a relationship with her would have a significant uphill battle.

losing her parents so violently, losing her home to a traitor, having to take up the mantle of commander at such a young age after d.uncan's death because a.listair wouldn't do it? now that she's older she doesn't blame him, but i think there was some unspoken tension brewing there for a little while when she was younger. but all of those things necessitated that she let the girl die in h.ighever so the woman could be born a grey warden.

because of that, i think that, yes, she loves and trusts her companions. of course she does. but none of them knew her before she became the de facto commander. none of them knew her when she was just clare, the t.eryn's witty and clever daughter.

except, rory knew her. rory has always known her and i think that's why my preferences for her romance have shifted towards ser gilmore and away from everyone else. clare can't let her hair down around everyone else as much as she can around rory - she HAS to be strong, always on, always decisive, always ready to lead the charge into battle. but rory knows her favorite color and her favorite flower, he knows that she used to sing beautifully before a childhood illness damaged her vocal cords, he knows that she used to sneak out to the castle town taverns to watch the bards perform folk music and dance with the commoners.

things she doesn't do anymore, and doesn't want to talk about anymore. the only way she can move forward is, to some extent, to pretend that her old life never happened. she loves a.listair SO MUCH but i no longer think it's romantic, which is such a huge shift from where her development was just five years ago.

anyway tl;dr i'm dedicating my new canon route to ser gilmore thanks to mods that make that possible.

[mercyburned]

i need to go through my old blog to find my headcanons (or honestly, just make a carrd at this point) but it's important to me that (1) clare's grandfather had an interest in magical studies and (2) brother aldous has been around highever since the dawn of time. both of these things shape clare's perspective about magic and mages and generally seeing both as normal things to be around. of course she's cognizant of how magic can be manipulated and used for evil, but she doesn't fear magic itself like many outside of the circle. it's just.. a thing that's there.

not only that, but let's talk about how the couslands apparently have enough power and influence to pilfer an entire mage from the circle because they wanted a private tutor for their children, and everyone knows that mages are probably the best-educated people in all of ferelden alongside nobility/royalty. i don't think she even realizes how powerful, wealthy, and influential her family really is until she gets out of highever and sees the rest of the world and how the people outside those walls struggle.

[mercyburned]

every character customizer is just 'how much can i make her look like clare'

dragon age origins - dragon age inquisition - cyberpunk 2077 - baldur's gate 3

[mercyburned]

'holding out for a hero' but the hero is not a man. the hero is clare cousland. she is strong and fast and fresh from the fight

[mercyburned]

tags 4 / ?

✦ this is our world now and i think we can do better. || finn collins

✦ i will avenge my ghosts with every breath i take. || clare cousland ✦ the juxtaposition of chaos and fury. || margo hawke ✦ with fire in her wings she dares the stars to fade. || sahar alami ✦ am i not allowed to have regrets? || jowan ✦ you can fascinate a mage with mac n cheese. || angus hawke ✦ you can't just hope for the best. you have to try. || nelaros ✦ she's a butterfly with bullet holes. || thea carlisle

✦ defender of the earth. || rose tyler ✦ let's show them our hearts. and then show them theirs. || godric ✦ golden child; lion boy; show me what it's like to conquer. || garrett alden ✦ once upon a time people were talking to graves. || judy alvarez ✦ it's a danger pretty here in night city. || val skinner ✦ wake up samurai! we've got a city to burn. || victoria iordanescu