#<- we're just gonna put our names from now on lmfao

[babyharleezy]

Reader goes into labor and Jack races from the studio to meet you at the hospital and it's just a super cute, fluffy birth story 💗

harlow the baby daddy

(jack harlow x reader)

bloo's notes: we clearin out my inbox!!! enjoy my loves!! @sealpuptrash thank you for helping me!! also picking names is so hard lmfao.

tag list: @harlowcomehome @wittyjasontodd @creme-delacreme @sealpuptrash @moody4world @thinkingboutjharlow

you weren't due for another two weeks which is why you encouraged jack to go to the studio in the first place. he had gotten a call from one of his homies, asking if jack would be down to come to the studio. he hesitated to say yes but you assured him that you would be fine and you would just chill.

"okay y/n i'm leaving baby. i'll see you in a bit. i love you ma" jack said before he kissed you and then leaned down to your belly and kissed your belly. he picked up on the habit of kissing your belly the minute you told him you were pregnant.

it had been a few hours since jack left and it was around 11 pm. you were just putting some finishing touches in babygirls room before you started feeling a bit of pain in your abdomen. you could tell that they were contractions but they were far apart so you ignored it for a bit. then they started becoming closer to each other and that's when you decided to panic. you picked up your phone and immediately called jack.

"jack she's coming. like now." you said into the phone, sending jack into a panic. "are you sure? i thought her release date wasn't until two weeks from now" he said. "jack i think i would know if she was coming or not" you replied with a slight attitude. "right. okay baby don't worry i'll be hope soon" jack said, trying to bring you some comfort. he told the guys and of course clay and urban wanted to come along so the three guys climbed into the car.

even though the studio was 20 minutes away it felt so much farther than it actually way. "are you ready to be a dad" clay asked his big brother. "yeah man i think i'm ready. i'm scared as hell but i know i'll be fine especially since i have y/n" jack said with fully honesty. "you'll be a great dad. y/n and you have so many people who will help you and love baby girl" urban reassured his life long friend. "thanks guys, you two are gonna be great uncles" jack told urban and clay just as they made their way into the driveway, leaving them no time to argue over who would be a better uncle always a damn competition with them. the three boys rushed inside the home to the soon to be mother.

"y/n i'm home baby, where are you?" jack called out the minute he walked through the door. "hey baby, i'm in baby girl's room" you hollered back from up the stairs. "okay don't move, we're on our way up" and just like the the three men were running up the stairs.

"hey baby how you doing?" jack asked you sweetly. "i feel contractions and i'm scared jack. i am so fucking scared" you confessed, tears filling your eyes. this is when clay and urban start panicking as well. "okay okay it's alright baby. you're gonna do amazing" jack reassured you, he was trying to calm himself down without freaking you out even more. urban had grabbed the hospital bag and clay had grabbed a few things you had asked for. jack helped you down the stairs and within minutes the four of you were in the car, on your way to the hospital.

luckily you had called your doctor before hand and he made sure everything was prepared. the four of you made your way to the hospital suite, where you would be staying in. it was like a hotel room, very spacious. clay and urban stayed for a little before you told them they should go home and rest up and come back in the morning. "thank you urban and clay for being here. i love you" you said to them before they left for the night. it was just you and jack for a while before you had to start pushing. until then jack was stuck by your side, aiding you when necessary. the contractions were getting extremely close and the pain was unbearable. jack held your hand the entire time, whispering words of encouragement into your ears.

"okay y/n, we're gonna have you start pushing here in a minute" the doctor said and you nodded. you were scared as fuck to say the least. "hey mamas, you're gonna do amazing. you are so strong and i can't wait for you to bring our baby girl into the world" jack whispered to you just before he planted a kiss onto your lips.

~ a few hours later ~

your baby girl had arrived at 3:33 am, weighing in at 7 lbs and 13 ounces, and she was 18 inches. you and jack were in aw of your baby girl; little miss Giselle May Harlow.

[nightmarecountry]

GET TO KNOW THE MUN MEME.

NAME: currently we mostly go by Wilds on here, though I (the host) am uh... between names, ha. went through some shit this year that i'm pretty sure triggered a host change/a new host split SO.

PRONOUNS: they/them collectively. it/its too if we're friends i think. it's complicated. host also uses she/her and (rarely, these days) he/him but again... complicated...

MOST ACTIVE MUSES: i mean. the corinthian, obviously, but which Flavour of him i want to write really depends on the day... over on my multimuse it varies WILDLY and often just depends on if there's a particular plot point or theme i'm rotating in my head a bunch.

RP PET PEEVES: look if i get into that here someone's gonna snipe me from the rooftops or something for having an honest feeling in public. i don't like lack of communication (or the passive aggression that comes with it), people feeling entitled to my time/attention/replies, or anyone making me feel obligated to do anything ever tbh.

EXPERIENCE / HOW MANY YEARS: i've been RPing for like uhhh... 17-18 years at this point. jesus.

FLUFF, ANGST, OR SMUT: definitely angst. i like reading smut more than writing it (mostly because writing it gets stressful real fast), and i love fluff but it's gotta have substance to it. i feel like the secret fourth answer here is "depth".

PLOTS OR MEMES: hmm... it's sort of both. i honestly like ic asks most of all: not memes, but not threads either. i like having a sort of 'foundation' to work off of and going back and forth with it, but i can only really plot extensively with someone when i've gotten to know them well. i LOVE memes but i tend to need a lot of them because if you only send one there's a solid 80% chance i won't have an answer in mind KJNSDJKNSDF

LONG OR SHORT REPLIES: medium i guess! i need to get comfortable doing short as hell replies again but i always worry people will take it as a lack of interest. i don't tend to do suuuper long replies because i have trouble remembering everything i've written lmfao

IDEAL TIME TO WRITE: somehow, 3-4am. i am rarely AWAKE during those hours right now but it's still just peak writing hours for me, probably due to lack of distractions.

ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S)?: baby i'm not even like myself. but in all seriousness, i feel like as a writer you're always gonna be putting bits and pieces of yourself into your characters - particularly for RP which is a much more uh, 'close contact' form of writing, i feel? i can separate myself very well from my characters when writing fic or other stories, but RP i feel requires you to step into their shoes a lot more often and more consistently... so yknow. anyway man i have DID you'd better believe there are pieces of lots of us in all of our characters. good luck guessing where they are (it isn't hard).

tagged by: @peacereflected but i also stole it from @ohsunshine because i'm in love with them both. hope this helps.

tagging: you. but also @spacereflected and @talentforlying and [spins a wheel] @pohlepen

[snezhnayansnow]

More One Piece!

Watching Dressrosa now...

I'm sure my husband is getting hella sick of me lmfao

But in all seriousness... One piece's number one rule: women are useless!

It doesn't matter how cool, how op, what the power is, how strong, how hyped up they are...

Women

Are

Useless

And it's killing me!

I won't even talk about the designs of the ladies but let's list our Dressrosa beauties:

Violet (Princess Viola) - to save her father she becomes an assassin for the Donquixote Pirates. That's so rad! She ate the Glare-Glare fruit (now the ocean hates her) which gives her these amazing clairvoyance powers and shit. She was going to fight Sanji till she was moved by his dedication and ability to see through her. She didn't want to work as an assassin, she wants to save her Kingdom! What a total badass! And then as soon as she joins the Strawhats... Useless. A man had to remind her to use her powers to locate the Tontatta Princess, Mansherry... And now she's nothing more than a pair of binoculars to watch the split up Strawhats. After she FOUGHT SANJI and FOUGHT TO SAVE SANJI! Did we forget about the whale tears? What the fuck!?

Rebecca - What a woman! Even though the whole country hated her, she entered the colosseum. This woman wanted to win to save her country so she could live peacefully with her dad friend! And even though I hated the fact here's a girl that's gonna fight but doesn't wanna hurt people... This bitch stuck to her guns like a fucking champ! She didn't hurt shit and is such a good dex fighter! Holy fuck!!! Of course she lost to Sabo because ya know...... But she joins forces with the Strawhats to save her Kingdom from the Donquixote family. And since she doesn't fight she's now useless........... Will we see more of her? Can she keep rolling those saving throws? Who cares! We'll know she's gonna be useless till one of the men comes along to save her...

Kuween (The Manager) - Here is a woman dedicated to her job! She is THE MOTHER FUCKING MANAGER of the smile factory. And she takes her shit seriously! Her weapon of choice is a... Vacuum? Okay... Um... Vacuums are cool I guess. She can suck up all the escaped rebellious Tontattas, who are slaves at the factory. Yeah she's a bad guy but what a girlboss taking so much responsibility and pride in her work! SUPER!!! Oh no, yeah wait, my boi Franky took her out with a hug and a kiss. Lowly virgin Kuween got played at the absolute MAN POWER of the pervs, Franky and Senor Pink. And is now useless... Like a Hallmark channel movie lead roll, giving up her job because of some useless man. Smh.

Giolla - a super scary art teacher looking mf with a passion for the avant-garde! This lady farts art with the power of the Art-Art fruit (and now the ocean hates her). She turned Chopper into a Minecraft character lmfao. Hilarious! The fact fluffy Doflamingo trusted this old woman enough to get on the Sunny and take the kid and the scientist is amazing! Mango do be trusting his crew! And she would have gotten away with it too... if she wasn't so full of artistic passion and let Brook sweet talk her into art... It do be like that. How come this ugly old broad was the best one yet!?

Baby 5 - yes that's her name, Baby 5. Why? Idk yet, probably some dumb backstory like abandoned by family or something (just finished episode 692: The Struggle with Pica — Zoro's One Finishing Move). However, look at her badass devil fruit... She can turn any part of her body into any kind of weapon using the Arm-Arm fruit (and now the ocean hates her). This bitch turned into a bomb, a fucking bomb, exploded and put herself back together. Fucking rad! So we know she can nuke a place and live. Her downside- she is a female Sanji. Some guy says something and she has to help him... It's sweet. Probably linked to that backstory and wanting to prove she's useful or something... Idk. I know a lot of ladies dream of being a bride and wife one day. So we're really playing this up, but this is totally screwing with her badass abilities. Another Hallmark movie lead roll syndrome claims another op woman... I also wanted to point out, when she fought Franky on punk hazard, changing her upper torso into a gun... She looked like a gun, but last episode fighting another character she changed into a rifle with tits. Are you fucking with me? The gun had to have tits suddenly. I fucking hate this show!

Sugar - the most useful one here, and here's my theory: she's not a woman "yet" but a child. So since since we can't slap tits on her to make her useless, she's more useful. Even though her devil fruit powers stops her body growth so she'll always be stuck with a physical appearance of a child, she's still not perceived as a woman, aka not perceived as useless! With the Hobby-Hobby fruit (and the ocean hating her) she's been turning all the citizens, not citizens, Navy/Marines, and anyone one else that gets in floofer Mango's way into toys, which some how also makes people forget about them. Weird flex, I still don't get it, but okay. She's only stopped by Ussop trying the spicy grape challenge... Which I would have been too. Ussop was fucking terrifying (get that man some milk). But just how useful is she? Well since we saw her freaking out from dudes with long noses and long noses shaped hot dogs... She got some PTSD. So even though this bitch can fight the Tontattas by matching their speed, which is crazy, and can literally make the world forget about you and turn you into a slave for the Donquixote Pirate family, we know how this is gonna end. She'll be rendered useless by some stupid Ussop long nose face thing before she can do any damage to the Strawhats.

Princess Mansherry - Who the fuck spelt her name? Idk, she's in the next episode so I got nothing on her yet except she's crying in the time-out room. Tontatta Princess, Mansherry, who Leo said was "selfish, mean, capricious, and short-tempered" and based on how she was crying for him to save her- bet this girl got a crush on that dude... Boys are dumb (but at least they're useful...)

Wicca - this Tontatta stole Zoro's sword! What a bad ass! We see the Tontatta's strength when she throws a tantrum while arguing with Zoro. And she has the balls to call Luffy, Zoro, and Kin'emon names, cuz they allllllll a special kind of stupid. And she had to put up with all 3 of them at once. Damn girl... And with all that strength what do we see her do? Absolutely nothing. She's become just another background Tontatta... Sad. After she had to do all that work to get Zoro to run in a straight line. She deserves better!

Bian (Pink Bee Squad Leader) - Yes, the Pink Bee herself. Why is she a bee? I'm not sure, I honestly can't remember if the anime said anything about devil fruit or something. Even though she has a title and a whole squadron bee-hind her, what has she actually done? She uhhhhh raided a ship to cause a distraction... And ummmmmmm spelt out some words to start a revolution in the smile factory so her Tontatta friends finally understood they've been tricked. But seriously, what has she done? We see more of that ugly ass beetle man, Kabu, the other squadron leader.

Acilia - omfg I forgot about her! I'm sorry QUEEN! A gladiator at the Corrida Colosseum and like one of 5 people that like Rebecca, this absolute unit of a woman throws her whole pussy into it every time. Honestly, barbarian to barbarian, this bitch serves cunt. She's strong AF and isn't afraid to show off some girly flair with all the cute hearts on her shield. She was fending off that Rolling Logan fool till Cabbage had to ruin it. And of course because Rebecca had to win (her saving throws are too good damn) our barbarian queen fell... But without her help, Rebecca wouldn't have survived. She was useful for one whole episode and that was pretty much it. You go QUEEN! I hope we'll see her again, but since she's such a side character I doubt she'll be showing up ever. You deserve better too, Acilia!

[putseraphinaonthaphone]

F.M.$. | Closet Perv HCs

/tw/dark content, dubcon, cuckolding, degradation, incest, voyeurism, exhibition,

Put yo ass, on my dick..

and pose on tha shit.

Tamaki

many people confused his dislike of public speaking with meekness

social anxiety did not stop your boyfriend from fucking you in front of his two best friends

they both watched his beloved little sister grow up a few years after them, so it was only fair they got to see how big you'd gotten

"She can take all of you?" Neijire asks, knowing first hand how big Tamaki feels inside you, watching as he has you splayed out on his bed with his hands planted firmly on your hips so he can push his cock into you inch by inch in a relentless slide

not only was he long but he was thick and curved just right to make you lose your mind behind your gag (your slick panties he crammed in your mouth when you tried to tell him it didn't turn you on to get fucked in front of his friends) every time he bottomed out inside you, his heavy balls slapping against your ass- a requirement he'd given you once you'd turned 19

"After training her every weekend of her second year at UA? Yeah, my little princess can take every, inch, of her big brother's attention."

He grinned at the way your eyes crossed every time he used your favorite toy on your clit while he just kept you stuffed full of him, liking the way you trembled and clenched around his cock while you came again and again and again...

"Takes a while to warm her up for anything fun though." By 'fun' he meant throwing your ankles over his shoulders and pounding into you with enough force that you pulled the most sinful ahegao face every time his balls slapped against your ass

It always made you squirt and babble mindlessly, a mess of his name and pleas for more, for him to let you take a break, anything

But the next day he blushed bright red when you brought him his lunch at school

Shouto

he really didn't like having to guess what you really thought, even though it was your shyness that drew him to you in the first place, because guessing meant you might be hurt in someway and he wouldn't know

so after consulting Bakugou, Kirishima, and Midoriya on how they would get a shy partner to open up, you're bound and gagged and sat on his lap with his almost painfully thick shaft splitting you open

you're both at his desk, and he's going down a list of questions about hard and soft limits, preferences, kinks, anything else he can think of, and taking notes on how your pussy reacts

"Do you wish to be in control in our love making? It may seem redundant considering how you haven't stop gripping me since I got you like this, but I want to be thorough."

you hate that you can't stop your pussy from quivering around him when he asks if you like to be degraded, and with a carefully written note in the journal he has open in front of you both he murmurs almost too politely, "It's alright. It won't be hard to point out how slutty you are darling, you've been soaking my jeans for the past half hour."

and so it continues, until you've soaked the soft silk scarf gagging you in tears of frustration. you don't want to answer more questions you want to get fucked

but Sho tells you time and time again, "we're done when I say we're done."

and every question gets answered before he closes his journal, just like he promised.

but then you're bent over his desk being fucked within an inch of your life by a man who now knows every filthy kink and button to press to make you cream on his cock

"Come on baby, squeeze daddy's cock, fuck just like that-"

And when you cum with a cry of "Daddy!" he's filling you up deep and hard so that you have a limp to go with the cum staining your thigh highs

Izuku

it wasn't fair to your boyfriend

who'd made you promise so many times while you were dating that you wanted him and not his boss

who you'd told honestly time and time again that Deku wasn't your type and that you liked bad boys like Bakugou just to make him laugh and relax

but you're soaking your panties the first time you hear your name in the pro hero's mouth

you're frozen where your boyfriend, the hero's sidekick, is somewhere beside you introducing the "two most important people" in his life

cause the greenette is looking you up and down and the way he licks his lips before saying your name is messing you up inside

"Nice to meet you, Deku," and fuck his eyes get darker hearing you say his hero name

Your Boyfriend, as great as he seemed a moment prior already seems so.. average

Izuku can feel himself getting hard in his dress pants because of the disappointment he can see in your eyes when your boyfriend takes your attention back

at first its just the looking

Deku looking at you whenever you have to come from your campus to bring your boyfriend lunch

You looking at Deku when he's already ripping his shirt off to change into his costume the one time an emergency alarm went off while you were in the office

but then you're walking back to your dorm after a party and some creep won't stop following you, you're to grateful to hear Deku's cheerful voice calling your name from his car and offering you a ride

it's not until the fear fades (approximately one second after the door closes and you're surrounded by the scent of pine and Izuku) that you ask what he was doing at your college

"Oh I just wanted to swing by," in that aw-shucks tone of his that made your panties grow soaked in seconds

when you don't take the bullshit excuse, "I'm high as a kite and I still can't believe you thought I'd buy that,"

he tells you your boyfriend was sent out of town for a two week training camp

maybe it's because you're still buzzing with the energy of the party you'd spent hours working yourself into an aroused stupor dancing and imagining the green haired man next to you

but you're able to meet his gaze when you tell him, "Then we should be going to your place. Dorm furniture is not reliable enough for what I'm gonna need you to do make this worth it."

It's the last big girl shit you say for the rest of the night.

because you're stone cold sober when his bedroom door closes behind you, trembling as you realize just how big he is when his naked body is over yours

if you try at all to cover yourself, close your thighs when he uses the breadth of his shoulders to bully them open wide, it's all

"Where ya going puppy? If I'm gonna make this worth your while you gotta let me see what I'm doing."

if you try to run from him when he's fucking you on your knees (you'd long since lost the ability to hold yourself up at all),

"Nuh uh, no running lil girl. I've waited too long to have my fill of your wet little pussy."

but what were you supposed to do? there's no way your boyfriend's average dick could compare to the heavy girth of the eight inches rearranging your insides

"You're not getting enough cock if you're this tiny," the greenette grunts above you as his large fucking hands hold your hips still so you can't escape every deep thrust that knocks right into your cervix

"Y-you got, two weeks," you wheeze as he fucks the breath out of your chest, and the way his cock twitches inside you kinda ruins his image as he hits your ass with a smack that has you moaning and calls you a slut

(maybe I'll do Kirishima and Shinsou in a pt two but damn this is getting long lmfao)

[reynie-muldoons]

'The Dance of the Celestial Orb' liveblog!

for real this time lmfao

book and show spoilers below

I'm ✨nervous✨ please let our children be okay

0:10 this Sticky arc hurts me so kuch

1:35 this music is BUMPIN

2:22 I just wanna know how she got under there without the dude seeing her

2:47 "all systems go" for the Improvement.... yikes 😬😬😬

2:55 she didn't wait even 5 seconds after they left, the door was still closing when she popped up 😂 can you imagine if one of them doubled back right at that moment

3:18 they look like the dudes from that veggietales movie, I think it was Esther- the island of perpetual tickling?? Anyone??? 😂😂😂

4:00 Kate vented.......

4:51 "not a rat" yeah no shit

5:07 if not for the suspense, I would be jamming out lmaooo

6:10 Mr. Benedict is looking at the shoreline, is he about to watch Kate dive in???? Because I mean that's where she's gotta be going

6:20 "memory challenges"? Is Rhonda talking about Milligan's amnesia, or has short term memory been affected as well??

6:29 .....thank you for answering so efficiently 😂

6:42 "I buy it. I completely.... buy it." RHONDA THAT'S NOT HELPFUL AHSKSHDJKD

6:56 can you imagine seeing your friend go down in a sub then hours later seeing the sub float up in fucking PIECES

7:06 KATE! KATE! KATE! KATE!

7:06 please let it be reunion time

7:25 oh hello that's a drop

7:38 *to the tune of Bezos I* come on Katie u can do it pave the way put ur back into it

7:51 she craves that mineral

8:06 Sticky, my child

8:20 oh my gosh they went out and LOOKED FOR HER I care them 😭😭😭

8:23 SHE KNEW HIS DREAM SHE KNEW HIS DREAM TELEPATH TELEPATH TELEPATH

8:34 STICKY STOPPPP

8:40 "jumping to conclusions is a failure of character" wow that really is something Curtain would say

8:52 angry Reynie. He is in rare form

8:54 "and you helped put her there!" OOOOOOOH I SCREAMED

9:03 "I shouldn't have yelled" okay but you kinda should have Sticky needs a wake up call

9:06 "dont apologize. I like this side of you." IS THIS THE START OF REYNIE AND CONSTANCE HAVING THE BEST SIBLING RELATIONSHIP

9:22 "if you really cared about me, you'd want me to be happy instead of standing there telling me who I am" oh Sticky my dude I am NOT digging the manipulation

9:36 Reynie pulling out the BFF card!!! Also Reynie digging in his feet because he knows he's right!!!! That's great setup for his arc as a strategist later

9:48 "I'm telling you, Kate's fine." Narrator: Kate was not, in fact, fine.

10:03 "they'll notice." Sticky has made one (1) good point.

10:11 oh dear god are they fingerprinting this bitch

10:19 all this equipment, has no one walked up to the cliff and looked down???

10:23 HAHAHAHA WAIT THEY ACTUALLY HAVEN'T

10:27 "we've been out here all night" that means Kate has been clinging to a cliff by her fingers and toes ALL NIGHT????

11:04 babe I know it's been a long night but maybe wait a second for them to actually leave before you climb back up

11:15 BUCKET NO

11:22 she has to go get it. There's no way someone wouldn't find that shit, it's in plain view

11:37 "WAS"???? WHY ARE WE SAYING WAS????? NO PAST TENSE HERE MILLIGAN'S FINE

11:43 "I only wish we could've known him better" NOOOPE NONONO WE'RE NOT DOING THIS

11:47 Rhonda back at it as the voice of reason!!!!!

11:59 "I have never met a more competent swimmer" throwback to "the baaAAAYYYY"

12:10 MR. BENEDICT'S FACE HAHAHAHA HOLD ON LET ME TAKE A PICTURE IM DYING

12:11 NUMBER TWO, NOT HELPING

12:14 RHONDA'S FACE HAHENDJDKDN

12:33 "we will go rescue him" because of COURSE he would

12:36 Rhonda is his best wingwoman omfg she's so consistent

12:54 MISS PERUMAL??????

12:56 MISS PERUMAL!!!!!!

13:00 SHE KNOWS HE'S RIGHT GAKSHDBDHEKSNND

13:09 "how hard can it be? It's an island!" PFFFFT

13:16 oh SQ baby boy please get out of there

13:25 "I certainly have my own suspicions" he said, looking at SQ why are you looking at SQ like that

13:31 SQ GET OUT OF THERE PLEASE IS2G

13:36 here we fuckin go

13:43 the captions have the f in forest capitalized like it's this special place

13:43 new hc that the Forest is a magical place like pixie hollow

13:57 TWO THINGS: 1. YES stand up for yourself baby!!!! 2. Shepard Quaid? Interesting! I don't think we ever got SQ's full name in the books, I hope TLS made that decision!

14:08 your "father hat"??? Oh my gosh shut the fuck up right there don't even continue

14:16 oh yeah real fuckin cute put on your "steward of this institution hat" and call that a good reason to be a shit person

14:43 "No." GOOD FOR HIMMMM GOOD JOB SQ

15:03 Kate's struggling right by the shore where a certain someone would be returning after a very hard swim, it would be a great time for a meeting wouldn't you think

15:09 KATE THE GREAT

15:11 "THE TRAPESE GODDESS" I WILL REFER TO HER AS NOTHING ELSE

15:26 sorry but that green screen of her falling was kinda funny

15:28 soooooo is someone, a very certain someone, gonna catch her...??????

15:36 YEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH

15:43 IS THIS IT????@?@?!?

15:46 awww poor baby girl you can tell how tired she is

15:46 just putting this out there- they look so good in frame together

15:46 the actor who plays Milligan is fucking huge in stature so I wasn't sure how that would go but it looks so good

16:00 THE WAY HE'S LOOKING AT HER WITH HIS HAND ON HER SHOULDER I CANT DO THISSSSS

16:20 "keep going." 😭😭😭😭😭

16:23 "you dont understand." Ohhhh I think he does

16:25 "I think I do." What did I tell you, he's got your back babygirl

16:45 I'm so glad she's talking this out, and with Milligan of all people

17:01 it makes so much sense for Kate to feel alone in that situation, and when Kate feels anything less than positive she goes and does something, whatever that something is.

17:05 "So.. I...." "fell off a cliff and nearly died." Thanks for putting things into perspective Milligan

17:05 Milligan is such a good dad stop

17:19 "most of the way" is an understatement LMFAO

17:29 I'm so glad we know the intimate details of Milligan's illustrious swimming abilities 😂 out of all the new things wfrom the show that one wasnt on my radar

17:52 leave it to Milligan to come up with an escape plan off of an island with no water vessel with four kids in tow

18:08 THEYRE SO CUTE 😭😭😭😭

18:08 lowkey I'm super surprised they didnt take this opportunity to have Milligan's arduous swim force his memories out and have the father daughter bonding time they deserve. I hope they give that moment ample time to flesh out.

18:13 BUCKET!!!

18:13 wait that shot is so artsy hold up lmfao

18:13 this looks like someone's photography final hahahaha

18:26 THE TENDER MUSIC STOPPPP 😭😭😭

18:41 Sticky is still on that jumping to conclusions bs he got from Curtain

18:44 WETHERALL'S WIDGET 😭

19:31 "Kate... she's in danger..." NO SHIT SHERLOCK

19:36 "and it's all because of me." Not just because of you but love to see you taking responsibility

19:52 once again I am asking WHY ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT THIS IN THE OPEN

20:26 "Kate. She has changed." "Not really. She's always been who she is." "Her clothes. She changed clothes." PFFFT HAHHAHA they really took a moment of self-reflection and made it so much better

20:55 AYYYYY KATE'S DEPENDENCY ARC CONTINUESSSSS

21:35 yikes yikes yikes

22:16 I love that Mr. Benedict got closure in telling Miss Perumal that her words stuck with him

22:40 the way she just knows Reynie took the position of leader 😭😭

22:54 SHE WROTE HIM A LETTERRR

23:02 "Would it be possible to get this to him?" Ma'am what part of undercover spy don't you get

23:54 it's still really weird that we are now in a position where Reynie is the one who is not trusted and Sticky is the one in Curtain's favor

24:13 and here we see Curtain's thinly veiled anger issues shining through

24:21 "the little things matter. Every minor detail, it all matters!" CALLBACK TO MR. BENEDICT TELLING THE CHILDREN THAT THEY ALL MATTER

24:55 "I can tell with complete accuracy when a person is lying." first of all, no. second of all, I cannot wait for him to talk to Constance.

26:33 why is Mr. Benedict graphically explaining the children's potential trauma so funny to me

26:40 "you're catastrophizing." "Yes. I am. Quite severely. Thank you." WHY IS THIS FUNNY

26:58 MADGE!!!!

27:16 she's so prettyyyyy

27:33 GOOD JOB MADGE!!!!!

27:36 wait did she just take the LETTER??? she's delivering the LETTER?????

28:05 WHAT DOES "OKAY FINE" MEAN??? REYNIE??????

28:22 it's sad because it's true 🥺

28:24 "I miss my teacher from the orphanage" the best lies are the ones rooted in truth 🥺🥺🥺

28:48 roll credits

29:16 Reynie honey Orion's Belt isn't on the ceiling

29:29 the way he was so confident that he had it right 😑 Curtain Stop Being a Pretentious Fuck challenge

29:52 our babygirl is so smartttt

29:55 did Milligan plant his prints 😳 oh no OH NO

29:57 MARTINA???? WHATSUEJHDKD

29:57 is this the replacement for when they pin cheating on her????

30:03 THE KEY CARD!!!!

30:11 MADGEEEE

30:21 "one attacked me as a small child" honey you are a small child

30:24 "it did not win," she said, smiling menacingly

30:40 "so we dance again" WHY DID THE MUSIC REV UP WHEN SHE SAID THAT HAHAHAHA

31:01 ✨woodworking is a passion✨

31:58 "was it functional?" "Well I guess that depends on how you define functionality" RHONDA'S FACE IN THE BACKGROUND HAHAHAHA

32:10 OH HEY MARTINA

32:17 wait 🥺

32:22 that has to be SQ :)

32:28 hi sweet boy

32:34 please tell me they did that shot of the sandwich because Madge is about to take it

32:39 LMFAOOOOO

32:44 hi good girl!!! Enjoy your snackies

32:50 oh god oh no the LETTER

33:25 oh wow we're doing this NOW??

33:52 and here we see another example of Curtain's thinly veiled anger issues bubbling to the surface

34:10 hey what if you uhhh weren't such an asshole

34:33 that man's voice is buttery

34:52 REYNIE'S TRYING TO TELL SQ????

35:02 and they're talking about this right in front of the office door, WHY??

35:24 AND THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT THIS RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE OFFICE DOOR, WHY????

35:55 he's letting him go 🥺🥺🥺🥺

36:14 why does that look like a body bag

36:17 oh my gosh it definitely is a body bag, hey Martina

36:25 yep, that's about what I expected

36:36 "whoever did this to me, they're gonna pay" oh girl do I have some bad news for you

37:12 ahhhh, so Martina is the burnt out gifted kid who keeps going out of spite and sheer force of will

37:12 everything makes much more sense now

37:30 ohhhhh my gosh feelings time

37:44 "I think it's awesome." "Yeah. I know you do." THE SHIPPERS ARE THRIVING

37:54 THEY REALLY WANT TO MAKE THIS AS PAINFUL AS POSSIBLE HUH

38:10 "it's the least I can do" that's an understatement 😬

38:14 AAWWWWW SHKSHSLSBDK

38:20 "I don't know what I'd do without you, Wetherall" STOPPPPP

38:30 HEY BUD UH MAYBE CLOSE YOUR DOOR???

38:38 he's been writing letters to her every night and now he finally gets one back 😭😭

39:34 so Miss Perumal wrote this letter with the intention of it being sent to him, right- why did she write it like that?? 😂

39:34 they've gone to such lengths to communicate in code but the letter kind of undermines that- it was written in such a way that an onlooker would know Reynie was a spy but wouldn't know what he was doing or why. No wonder SQ was pissed

39:41 KATE!!

40:10 BREAKING NEWS: local bastard man treats everyone like shit

40:15 ohhhhh SQ bud please be careful

40:30 "always have time for my son," he said in a clipped voice that implied that he does not have time for his son

40:35 ohhh he's getting RIGHT INTO IT HUH

40:41 you mean to tell me he's never asked about Mr. Curtain's work?? Ever???? Somehow that doesn't seem right to me

40:57 hey uh what if you didn't talk down to SQ at every opportunity

41:02 "would you care to reconsider that answer, son?" "No." DIG THOSE HEELS IN SQ!!!!

41:22 I'm really not digging that Curtain is using the guise of openly expressing his feelings to communicate his anger and his unasked question. Not cool bitch head

41:33 the fact that he didn't answer SQ's spoken question kind of also answers his unspoken question

41:45 "I knew there was something off about that girl. But espionage?" "How do you so convincingly fake a tetherball obsession?" I love that this entire conversation could be about Martina or Kate interchangeably

42:34 WELL THAT'S NOT GOOD

42:36 IF IT WAS THAT EASY TO FIND WITH BINOCULARS HOW HAD THEY NOT BEEN SPOTTED UP UNTIL THIS POINT?!!?#? HOW????

43:05 Kate advocating for Martina with the Society 🥺🥺 the interaction I didn't know I needed

43:58 "I definitely don't like to leave anything unfinished." "That's true, I've seen you eat." PFFFFT

44:05 YESS YOU GO STICKY USE YOUR ACCESS FOR PRIME INTEL

44:19 "well, you can't succeed without me, so..." baby girl you have no idea how right you are

44:28 please let that be Milligan PLEASE LET THAT BE MILLIGAN

44:32 YEAAAAAHHHHH

44:35 I simply adore him

44:45 "would you mind helping me down, please? I'm stuck." Your honor I would die for this man

44:54 oh shit, Martina's tryna sleuth it out herself.. this can't end well

45:04 is she about to find Kate's marbles or something?? Callback to the book?

45:26 the absolute MURDER in her eyes

45:31 FUCKIN YIKES

45:41 "the clothes of someone who had given up" ASEJDGEIDNDLFK

45:47 well that's not good

46:00 WELL THAT'S NOT GOOD

46:04 PLEASE let them be on their way already, please

46:14 THEY MADE A BLIMP????

46:17 Goodyear is QUAKING

46:35 why the fuck is Number Two in red, that's upsetting on principle

THEYRE JUST ENDING IT THERE???? goddamnit!!!!

How surreal is it that next week is the finale?? Idk if I'm ready for that????

[blueboltkatana]

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST

GUrll ur so sexy... Like you're Hot. I don't care if you were bullied in school, you're sexy, they lied.

Also bitch I KNEW i related to you too much our ascendants are both in leo we're so hot.

Ok ok no now I'll stop complimenting and start with the roasting here we go:

So the sun is your sense of "self" it represents you on the more base level i guess you could say, like what most people think you're like is represented by your sun. With Sagittarius being your sun it means you're very energetic Especially for those things you are passionate about, you might have gone through a LOT of hobbies, only a few of them stuck around but you like to try things. You're curious about the way people's minds works, you wanna figure them out. If the conversations you have don't involve some form of psychoanalysis or philosophy you might loose interest. You are a Talker, maybe you talk very fast or you are often told to lower your voice but you don't do it on purpose you're just very very animated. You are kina volatile, in the sense that you value freedom in everything, love, work, hobbies. You have a huge rebellious streak and you kinda like testing your luck. Think adrenaline junkie. It's cliché but with this much Sagittarius in your chart you prob love traveling, like i said you will chase freedom because you associate it with happiness. If you find people that make you feel free then you feel happy. Rules don't go well with you. You don't really like being involved with fights per se but you LOVE debating, if you can beat a motherfucker with nothing but facts and logic you will and you will enjoy it.

Your way of flirting or making friends is "lowkey bullying" or my favourite "verbally throwing hands". If they shoot back you get heart eyes (my mars in sag agrees). You can be tactless as fuck tho. Like you will say some outrageous shit that MIGHT be funny if the timing is right or MIGHT make everyone in a 5 mile radius mad.

I NEED to talk about your moon in sag bc Babe, babe the moon tells us about our emotions and how we deal with them, how we express them and how they shape us. But BABE. Sagittarius moons are so bad at comforting people it's embarrassing, trying to make them think of smth else or do smth else to distract from the situation is NOT a good way to deal with your emotions... Avoiding your emotions like the plague is not gonna invent a vaccine... Saying "everything is fine :)" DOESN'T MAKE ANYTHING FINE PLEASE GO TO THERAPY. ok to give you some credit, you don't let shit bring you down, no matter what you always get up and that is a *strength* that i admire, but love you're burning the candle at both ends, especially if you get yourself in More problems by trying to distract yourself from One problem.

Also you've had a horsegirl phase or a dog obsession phase or both huh. AND your love language is sarcasm but the type that you will make someone laugh when you're insulting them. You're also hilarious irl you're prob the "funny friend" but with that scorpio mars and venus baby inside ur sad and dark as fuck ripp.

I also wanted to talk about your mercury in sag... Babe... Do you know what a brain to mouth filter IS?! do you recognize that word?!?! Cuz you have never used yours i think. Like you are hilarious but that's because you have dolphins in the head cavity baby. Not trying to say you're stupid, you're actually very smart and opinionated, probably have been told that you'd be a great lawyer or smth. But miss gurl please think before you speak for the love of god ur gonna make someone cry. Also ur mouth is foul. Have you ever spoken a sentence without a "fuck" or a "cunt" somewhere in there?! God bless.

Now for your scorpio Venus I'm just gonna say, more confirmation that ur Sexy as Fuck, scorpio venuses are just sexy, amazing partners, VERY passionate, whoever dates you will never forget you, for better or for worse you'll forever be on the back of their mind. You had a harsh emo phase huh, maybe loved some obscure shit like witchcraft or just love dressing all black like someone's mother died, i bet you wear silver jewelry a lot, maybe necklaces or rings or chockers. If this isn't how you dress now it was prob a major phase in your life. Or maybe you just love horror movies idk

Being as passionate as you are you don't take well to being mistreated or lied to, you might like to plot revenge and things like those, you wouldn't do anything... You actually prefer letting things go but you WILL make an elaborate scenario in your head at 3am or even as you stare right in the persons face.

With mars in scorpio you might be kinda passive aggressive, maybe you act like things don't really bother you but you throw a comment or two once in a while just to stir the pot bc you can't move on lmfao.

You are attracted to people that are introverts or generally just mysterious, like i said above the nature of the Sagittarius is to Learn and to Study. People that you can't immediately figure out intrigue you. All your crushes are either on geminis or water signs lmfao.

The best careers for you are the ones that allow you some freedom of either movement or expression and something that can keep your mind from flying away, something that keeps you intrigued, like research or writing. You're a very "all or nothing" person and it can sometimes scare people away, i advise you to work on compromising, being less stubborn and more open with your emotions and desires.

(part one bc I'm taking too long and I don't wanna keep you waiting so much) I'll reblog this with part 2

Alright here we go part 2 of Roasting hella until she finds out I'm hiding in her walls.

I will skip over some planets that are Very slow moving and usually don't talk about you as an individual but refer to your generation as a whole.

I wanna focus on lilith for a sec bc worstie lilith talks about our fears, our more "darker" side that we hide from ourselves as well as the people that we love. Lilith in aries in the eleventh house tells me you might be afraid to take charge, you gravitate towards positions of leadership but you let go on the last second, almost afraid to have too much control, very often self sabotaging your own success. Your anger and you own ambition might scare you, you might be afraid of appearing too aggressive bc under your skin you have a deep rooted anger and rebellion that you wish to relieve but you can't find a good enough outlet, some things soothe it but you always feel like it never leaves. It might be related to some form of resentment that you never truly dealt with and now it sits uncomfortably with you and you just can't get over it and it bothers you. You might have been shy in groups as a child, maybe you talked a lot but it was always from a fear of the silence not always because you had something to say. The eleventh house is that of groups and friends and social awareness, technology and your hopes and wishes for the future, having lilith in this house talks about someone who had a hard time feeling comfortable around people OR someone who wasn't very accepted. You might have desperately wished for friends but have found it hard to find any. Or if you did, you deep down felt very alone. I would advise to learn to accept your anger and deal with it in healthy ways instead of brushing it off and repressing it.

The north node talks about what you need to focus more in your life for example in your case with Gemini in your North node you need to focus more on your communication letting go of anxiety and your relation with other people you need to become more interested in intellectual pursuit and growth. You need to let go off the need to always be right and look more at details instead of focusing on on the bigger picture all of the time. When your North node is is in Gemini then your South node is in Sagittarius which tells me that what you should focus less on is your pursuit of freedom and your rebellion. Be more aware of your words and use them with maturity.

Now let's have some fun with the ascendent in leo which we share and now i see why ur so relatable. The first house or the ascendant is that very superficial layer of our personality, it includes the way we carry ourselves, our style, the little habits or quirks we have. One thing about leo ascendants is that we have an obsession with our hair. Hair is important to us, some have huge hair that might remind you of a lions mane, others just have very unique style or color but we ALL are lowkey or highkey obsessed with it, either constantly touching it, pulling it, chewing on it, cutting it or dying it in unique ways you name it. You might have a rather large nose or cat like eyes.

This ascendent is full of life and light, very funny, light hearted and luxurious, you want to live that good life and i don't blame you. A negative aspect is that we come of as intimidating to others. ALL of my friends AND my ex have at some point told me I was intimidating to them. It makes us prone to overcompensating for it later in life so maybe now you're super outgoing and extroverted and you approach people first and try to be super friendly. Also you're an attention whore (affectionate) with a flare for the dramatics, very flamboyant, you basically fill the room with personality, it attracts attention and you love it. You're what people would call a "sunny" person.

You're hella competitive (get it lol) and you LOVE fighting your way to the top and crushing the competition. You're probably a weirdo that low key likes school. Not the way it's run or the teachers or whatever, but the "idea" of school. If you could just learn all your life you absolutely would.

Second house in virgo. The 2nd house is the house of money, work, income, daily routines, values, material possessions, habits, work ethic ect being in virgo it means you can have an extremely good work ethic, you put a lot of thought in planning and mapping your work, you might get overly critical on your work though and often undermine your own success and efforts because they didn't fit your impossible standards. You can be very organized in your work, you want things to be a certain way and if they don't follow your plan you will Make them. Its a good position for virgo but yoh need to be aware of not overworking by trying to do Everything on your own. Let others help you, and let people in your work do their own things don't try to help if not asked to because you will overwork yourself.

The third house is that of the mind, thinking, communication, siblings, interests and early education, in your case it is in Libra which means that you're early education might not have been very stable or it was a period of time that you look back with a lot of fondness but not much substance. You are a good talker but you get lost when it comes to details, you are indecisive when it comes to settling on an opinion on something if you don't have All the facts first, you always want to be right. You are pretty open minded and easy to talk to but you might have the bad habit of rambling off topic. You change interests constantly and you prob like to talk about others, you wanna know the tea if it kills you. You prob had a crush on a childhood best friend or on a hot neighbor. Your relationship with your siblings might be pretty good, friendly, no particular resentment or anything like that, you might be the one that everyone treats a little better, people let you get away with things more often, you might be the one that takes 2 hours in the bathroom lol.

Oof fourth house in scorpio babe how are the mommy issues? 😬 How is your relationship with your femininity? Having trouble with keeping secrets? So the fourth house is the one responsible for your home roots, your family, self-care, emotions, your mother, women and your femininity and having Scorpio here tells me that you might have very strong ties to your family, but they weren't healthy or emotionally supportive. You have grown with people that might have undermined your emotions, people that didn't teach you to set healthy boundaries and maybe even manipulators and gaslighters. You might have been the type to put your foot down a lot a home, assuming a very dominant role as well as the defender. You're very private about your family life and don't want to let people too close.

Ah i just noticed u have like 3 planets in this house including ur Sun and Moon, babe this house is what you need to focus on when you go to therapy. This almost secretive, guarded approach to understanding your own emotions is very prominent in how you see yourself, how you feel and with Pluto there, how you change. I could say the biggest changes in your life have happened in these areas and they have left the biggest impacts on you. Yes you are passionate and protective but don't let bad feelings marinate forever, address them and then move on from them because they're just weighting you down.

Fifth house in sag, also the house of your mercury. This house represents Love, romance, creativity, self expression, joy and childlike spirit. It tells me the way you express your creativity is through words which makes sense since you're a great writer, but not only, the way you express Love is also through your words, expression and free thoughts are your way you tell your loved ones how much you mean to them, think poetry, long rants, music recommendations bc of specific song lyrics, you have been writing form childhood and it's one of the ways you express your view on beauty as well, to you love is freedom and freedom is expression.

Capricorn in the sixth house paired with both uranus and neptune being in it tells me there is something about your knees, joints, bones or teeth in particular that stands out when it comes to your health, maybe you tend to break your teeth, maybe you like chewing on crunchy foods, maybe your joints crack a lot, idk but I'd drink my milk if i was you, take care of your joints and bones. Also for you, being emotionally unwell often translates to being Physically unwell as well, so be mindful of your emotions because they do affect you physically. You need to keep hydrated also and your health plan needs structure for it to work bc that neptune makes everything very chaotic and uranus constantly makes you bored and wanting to spice things up. Take care of your emotional needs just as much as you would with your physical ones. And for the love of jesus be CAREFUL with alcohol or smoking because that neptune in ur health house could mean serious trouble if you let it become an addiction, don't push it.

Aquarius in the seventh house of relationships, marriage, contracts, business partners ect means you are untraditionally traditional. That makes sense in my head let me explain. Aquarius is a sign that seeks individualism desperately, it likes to feel like a special person, impossible to understand. Yet always feels comfortable in the structure of traditional and safe paths. So for example you might marry someone in a way that is not traditional but at the end of the day you wish for your marriage to have a stability you would feel safe falling into. Also it says ur gay. Air signs in the relationship house says ur gay i Make the rules.

Pisces is in the eighth house of sex, intimacy, shared finances, inheritance, taxes, loans, property, mystery, partner's resources. This tells me you fuck with feeling lmfao. Or you simply make your love life something "special", a connection that only you and ur person can share, it's what makes you an amazing lover and an unforgettable one as well. But as amazing as you are at creating a otherworldly atmosphere, ur just as shit at setting boundaries and saying something when you don't like something. You don't like to see things that you love ending and a failed relationship makes you blame yourself too much, you have the tendency to stay in situations where you are being mistreated but you tell yourself It's on you.

A recurring theme I'm seeing is some weakness when it comes to liars or manipulators in your life. So either you irrationally fear people are lying to you because you "lie" to them about yourself or a lot of people in your childhood might have used lying or gaslighting as a way to keep you under control. I would advise to try not to overthink and become paranoid, people love you and they believe in you and they aren't deceiving you, they don't secretly mean something different from what they have said. Listen to your intuition about people sure, but don't confuse it with anxiety.

With lilith and aries in the 9th house of travel and higher education and religion I'm gonna assume you might have religious trauma. Religion might have been a way that people used to try and control you, if not religion then some form of system or government law. Being queer i completely understand the sentiment but in your case it's take a step further because you Value the ideals of this house so much, with lilith here, it's like at som point in your life you were finally awakened to how much injustice there was in the world ant that has made you very inclined to take action, you cannot stand unjust government or non tolerating religions. You might have felt crushed under an unjust system and it took you a lot of will and conviction to find your individuality and build yourself how you wanted once you were free.

Your midheaven in taurus tells me you are one that will achieve any goals you set your mind to. It might take you time, you might procrastinate around it, but at the end of the day, you will do it and you will do it well and it will be rewarding. If your father isn't a Taurus then he was a stable figure in your life, very much a rock for better or for worse. In your career life people will see you as very competent, very down to earth and helpful but you know you just procrastinated till the last second possible and stayed up all night do finish your work... You will seek careers that you believe will guarantee you stable income and a comfortable life. You might indulge in luxury from time to time because you think in order to get the position you want at work you need to look the part. Ultimately it's your sheer stubbornness and spite that gets you all the way up to the top of the food chain.

The eleventh house of groups, friendships, humanitarianism, and social awareness is in your case in gemini. It tells me you value friendship extremely and you surround yourself with a diverse cast of friends, you couldn't mix your different friend groups if you tried and you have tried. You have the habit of being too friendly to everyone which makes you end up with more friends than you know what to do with. You are approachable but people can get the impression that you are putting up a show or a facade and your emotions arent genuine, it's not always the case but you need to be more truthful and assertive, put some boundaries and don't let people get away with shit you don't like. Your public persona is very well liked, seen as fun and bright and smart and overall a joy to be around.

Now that last placement... 12th house cancer, i have the same placement and babe I'm sorry for all the shit you have been through. You deserve the freedom to be unhappy and to express that unhappiness in healthy ways. You deserve to be given unconditional love and support no matter how many mistakes you say you have made no matter how overly pessimistic you are about yourself it doesn't matter you're amazing and i love you and you deserve the world.

With jupiter the planet of expansion in the 12th house of endings, spirituality, solitude and karma?! Gurl i did say u were a cult leader but i didn't think it was astrologically backed up rippp. But it also says you might have a hard time getting the motivation to finish things, you might take a long time to finish a project. This house placements also tells me you're amazing at writing emotional ass fantasy stories which by now we have confirmed, but if you have like, an original idea for a book don't hesitate to get it started babe bc u have a very promising placement for that. Don't get too dragged into a sad whirlpool of emotions and daydreams but bring your creative ideas to life and you'll be fine.

This is all I'm doing today and i think it's enough lol. I'm posting this I'm sorry to my followers for the long ass post I'll tag it so you can filter it. This was a whole psycho-astrological analysis of our favourite writer Hellspawn1975. I have wanted to study her like a new lizard species for a while and i finally got the chance thank you hella for the opportunity.

Final words to @hella1975 i hate you and I'll fuck ur mom tomorrow, gn babe <3