#я стояла и смотрела как одна сосна горела я сама сгореть хотела - протянула к ней ладонь

[hanabeeri]

reading a little life has helped me come to terms with my own history of harassment and abuse (?) i don't know if it even counts as abuse. but yeah!!! ended up crying yesterday night

i felt really light afterwards

and while it didn't really fix anything i allowed myself to feel really mad and really upset at those things. at all the men, my family and the people in school. and while the anger won't heal the trauma i at least came to terms with it. who knows maybe now i won't react to certain triggers as intense 🥹

on a lighter and brighter note, university starts tomorrow!!! yippie 🧸💕💞 im already nervous i don't know if i'll find sleep tonight but it's going to be okay <3 and after university i'll stay at the library in my hometown and study for as long as i can (aka for as long as the library will be open)

one of my fav songs of sufjan stevens 🥺 💕💞💞💕 comfort song