#— ��❛ // ZIGGY BERMAN ¦ for once in your life could you just stop pretending? ・ 「 study ! 」

[chmerical-a]

❛   i also buried a part of myself alongside them.  ❜  (from joey for ziggy?)

she's  not  used  to  company,  never  has  been,  but  after nightwing?  well,  friends..no,  not  even  friends,  acquaintances more  like,  were  more  than  sparse.  and  while  there's  that  tight frown  stubbornly  tugging  her  lips  down,  ziggy  berman  can't  help but  be  relieved  at  the  sight  of  a  familiar  face,  if  only  for  a moment.  the  rest  of  the  town  had  written  her  of  as  a  nutcase, someone  desperate  and  looking  for  attention.  as  if  the  redhead would  even  want  anything  like  that.  the  mere  thought  brings out  a  nasty  bit  of  vexation,  a  defensive  wall  she's  put  up  for years  to  avoid  the  judgment,  and  the  hurt  that  comes  from  it.

she  doesn't  know  why  joey  stuck  around  to  talk  to  her,  she doesn't  bother  to  ask,  assumptions  always  win  with  her  anyway. and  she's  so  close  to  ushering  him  away,  slamming  the  door  in his  face  to  hide  away  from  intrusive,  prying  eyes.  but  it's  not until  he's  looking  at  her  with  an  earnest  gaze  with  eyes  that just  get  it,  that  she'll  feel  that  reticence  beginning  to  back  off and,  well..  maybe  a  few  bricks  will  fall,  the  carefully  built  wall weakening  just  a  tad.  and  she  finds  herself  feeling  some  sense of  comfort,  she's  not  alone.  they  both  lost  someone  important that  night.  and  maybe  that  thought  makes  her  heart  hurt  a little  less.  they're  in  her  living  room,  tea  filled  mugs  resting  on her  table,  mismatched  coasters  underneath  them.  baby  blues dart  away  from  him  at  his  words,  her  heart  giving  a  squeeze,  a pang  of  pain  she's  spent  years  numbing  away.  and  as  her  hands reach  for  her  drink,  she  wishes  there  was  something  stronger  in her  mug.  all  she  can  do  is  furrow  her  brows,  taking  a  beat before  bringing  it  to  her  lips,  taking  a  tentative  sip  before bringing  it  back  down,  though  her  hands  will  stay  tightly gripped  on  it.  there's  no  denying  she's  taken  aback,  being  so plainly  seen  will  do  that  to  a  person  after  all,  ❝  speak  for yourself,  slater,  not  like  i  had  much  to  lose.  ❞  and  there's  that damn  temper  of  hers  taking  over,  a  bark  that  almost  makes  her wince.  a  breath,  a  beat,  and  she'll  set  the  mug  down,  eyes decidedly  pointed  down,  ❝  do..  do  you  think  about  them...  it often?  ❞  it's  sincere,  so  much  that  she  can't  bring  herself  to bring  those  baby  blues  of  hers  up  to  meet  his  gaze.  she's stubborn  and  it'll  stay  put,  there's  no  getting  the  redhead  to back  down,  never  has  been  (  though  part  of  her  knows  it's  that shame  from  vulnerability,  and  that's  not  exactly  the  toughest thing,  is  it?  ❝  i..  y'know,  i  thought  it'd  come  and  go  in  waves  at this  point,  but..  well,  ah..  ❞  and  she  has  to  take  a  moment,  as embarrassing  as  it  is,  ❝  it's  a  constant.  ever  since  the  night  it happened.  there's  this...  it's  just  hard.  and  sometimes  i  really don't  know  what  to  do  with  it.  ❞

✱ㅤㅤ@tragicsongs sent in a meme!!

[lesbianlotties]

three guesses - Alice/Cindy - Fear Street

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Fear Street Trilogy (TV) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Alice/Cindy Berman (Fear Street) Characters: Alice (Fear Street Part 2: 1978), Cindy Berman (Fear Street) Additional Tags: Pre-Canon, Best Friends, Childhood Friends, Friends to Lovers, First Love, First Kiss, Lesbian Cindy Berman (Fear Street), Fluff, it's basically fluff with humor character study foreshadowing and idk they're just cute Words: 1,845

The two of them were only friends and would always be and Alice was perfectly fine with that… sometimes.

or

Alice and Cindy are best friends and have always been. Alice and Cindy are also hopelessly in love with each other, even if they don't know it yet. Then... their first kiss happens.

Alice was used to thinking a lot about Cindy Berman. It started when they were just little kids. Alice had been of the misguided belief that bothering somebody was a reasonable way to show your appreciation for them. So, mesmerized by the quiet brunette that carried herself with more confidence than anyone else in the playground, a young Alice had decided to push Cindy to the ground. She had smiled all the way even after Cindy had jumped back to her feet and tackled her down to the ground too. It had been the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Just a regular friendship. The two of them were only friends and would always be and Alice was perfectly fine with that… sometimes.

The problem was she never stopped thinking too much about Cindy Berman. She thought about those blue eyes that were inevitably expressive and honest despite Cindy’s emotional walls. She thought about Cindy’s temper, the scariest thing in all of Shadyside for Alice, who was used to seeing Cindy as impressively calm and collected until one bad thing set her off beyond repair and it was time to hide. Except, Alice never hid from Cindy. She took Cindy’s anger, and Cindy’s passion, and Cindy’s braveness, and it only made her stronger, something she was thankful for. Not only did she need a considerable amount of strength to endure her own complicated life. But it was something that prepared her for all the things that entailed having Cindy Berman in her life and, worst-case scenario, losing her.

It was a complicated balance, whatever it was that Cindy kept inside her. Alice didn’t exactly understand it. She had never considered herself to be too complicated. She was just lucky enough to be one of the people that didn’t have to put too much effort into understanding themselves. Confident and comfortable in the person she was from a young age, Alice had a lot of free self-discovery time to spare. Time she spent staring at Cindy when she thought the other girl wouldn’t notice. So, she noticed the signs. Slowly but surely Cindy raised the walls she kept around herself. Cindy was used to trying to tame her temper for others’ sake, but she started taming her confidence, and her authenticity. It looked like she was trying to isolate herself from the rest of Shadyside. Alice was left fearing the day some little thing would change Cindy Berman forever. 

Before that could happen, however, they were still just themselves. Alice and her unrestrained laughter, Cindy and her fearless nature. Alice and her curiosity, Cindy and her cleverness. A treacherous combination that was put to good use in Shadyside, where looking for trouble was the easiest thing in the world. There was no need to pretend they were someone else, some well-adjusted children, some picture-perfect girls from a magazine. They were messy, and creative, and inseparable. Alice looked for trouble, Cindy dared her to make it twice as risky. Alice hesitated at the edge of a cliff, Cindy ran up behind her and threw both of them to a lake, limbs tangled and free as they would ever be. Last but not least, Alice was clueless as to how to express her feelings for her best friend, and Cindy instinctively but blindly reciprocated them twice as fiercely.

There was a special summer when the two girls had the most fun they ever had together. Of course, there were gray clouds all around their small bubble of joy. They were in Shadyside, after all. Alice was already hiding scars, and Cindy’s father was already out of the picture. Alice was starting to want more fun than it could be safe to have, just to pretend that the rest of life wasn’t so difficult. Cindy was starting to retreat into her own thoughts, the wheels turning in her mind as she stared at the easier lives that Sunnyvalers had. But things hadn’t gotten out of control yet. Summer felt bright and endless. Cindy cut Alice hair, and Alice nearly burned down the Berman’s kitchen. Always a little chaos, always a lot of fun, always the two of them together. They spent their days together, to make up for the shadows lurking in their respective homes. Very often, Cindy’s younger sister would tag along with them, making Cindy complain about how much Ziggy was trying to be like Alice, even if she secretly thought it was adorable. Life was good.

Life, however, was going to be put upside down for them very soon. Not even in the tragic way they had grown to expect. Not yet.

First, they had to live through the day when they were hanging out at the Berman residence and Alice asked Cindy to do her makeup. More specifically, Alice shoved a black eyeliner in her best friend’s hands and then let herself fall on Cindy’s bed without a second thought.

“Come on. Don’t stop until I look like a stoned panda,” Alice said.

“You’re so stupid,” Cindy sighed. She was using that very particular Cindy Berman tone of voice that Alice could recognize as trying to sound annoyed but secretly enjoying herself.

Alice's thoughts, however, were rudely interrupted by her brain finally catching up with her severe miscalculation. Before she knew what exactly was happening, Cindy was on the bed with her. Cindy was on the bed on top of her. Her admirable best friend was straddling Alice’s waist and wearing a deep frown of concentration as she started to work on Alice’s eyeliner.

“Shut your mouth before a fly gets lost in there,” Cindy teased her friend with a smirk.

Seeing herself caught with her lips parted in surprise, Alice snapped her mouth shut. But she continued to stare up at her best friend’s endearingly focused expression. This position was at once that best and worst feeling Alice could remember experiencing in her young life. Cindy’s eyes were strikingly blue. And no matter how tough Cindy tried to look, there was always that soft smile that appeared on her lips without her realizing it. Their faces were maddeningly close. Alice could feel Cindy breathing, and she could have probably heard Cindy’s heart beating, if her own heartbeat wasn’t already a loud drum in her chest. Before she could worry too much about the idea of Cindy being able to hear her heart beating so loud and wonder the reason behind that, Alice decided to do something about this situation. She had to fight back. 

“You look cute,” Alice blurted out. She felt genuinely surprised by her mind’s ability to continuously come up with the wrong strategy to express or hide her feelings.

“Shut up,” Cindy replied. She scoffed like a true unruly Shadysider. But Cindy still marveled at her friend’s inability to hide that sweet strain in her voice. It didn’t matter if at the end of the day they were all cursed the same. To Alice, Cindy was unlike everyone else in this town.

“What?” Alice laughed, “It’s true!”

Her laughter shook her whole body, and nearly made Cindy lose her balance. But instead of laughing along, the brunette’s frown deepened and she stopped her use of the eyeliner.

“Hey!” Cindy snapped. “I’m as tough as you, you know?” She poked at her friend’s chest with the eyeliner.

“Ouch!” Alice exclaimed, and raised her hands in surrender. “I know, Berman. Trust me, I know.” She took a moment to think about all those times when Cindy Berman and her angelic blue eyes proved to be just as much of a troublemaker as Alice herself. However, then she couldn’t help but break the silence. “You’re still cute though.”

This time Cindy surrendered to her friend’s charm and laughed along with her. “Fuck you,” she said and rolled her eyes affectionately. Then she started working on Alice’s makeup again.

However, that little interruption had brought them closer than before, which started a couple of problems. For Cindy, she realized she was nearly done. She had already applied more eyeliner than necessary. But she was thrown off guard by how much she did not want to move away from her current spot. For Alice, as usual, her problem started with Cindy’s laugh. Because it brought Alice’s attention to Cindy’s mouth, and then there was Cindy’s easy smile firmly in place, and Alice simply couldn’t look away from her best friend’s lips. In the end, it couldn’t have happened more naturally even in their dreams.

The atmosphere around them had irrevocably changed. The energy between their bodies was simply different. Cindy couldn’t have continued with the application of makeup even if she had tried, because her hand was starting to shake. So instead she found balance holding on to Alice’s right shoulder. 

“Done,” Cindy announced quietly, without meeting Alice’s eyes.

“Thanks,” Alice replied, her eyes still lingering on Cindy’s lips.

Then Alice carefully pushed herself up on her elbows. Not much, just enough to hear a very small breathless gasp escape Cindy’s mouth. But neither of them tried to move away from each other.

“Alice.”

“Yeah?”

Only when she heard Cindy call her name did Alice look back into her favorite pair of blue eyes. She was beyond happy to notice those eyes were staring at her mouth. Her heart was beating so loudly in her chest that Alice feared she could get a heart attack. Still, she was smiling when she finally closed the distance between them and kissed Cindy Berman for the first time.

Alice nearly gasped in utter surprise when she felt Cindy immediately reciprocate the kiss. But then Cindy pulled away, enough to spark a sense of panic in the other girl, but not enough for it to last. In fact, it seemed she only moved to sit more comfortably in Alice’s lap.

“What are you doing?” Cindy wondered breathlessly. She shook her head a little, incredulous, not of what just happened, but of how good it felt. She placed a gentle hand on Alice's cheek. She could feel and see the moment Alice smiled playfully at her.

“Three guesses,” Alice replied right before reconnecting their lips in a  much more confident kiss.

Cindy made a small noise of surprise, and then she stifled a giggle against Alice’s lips. They continued to exchange kisses until Alice’s arms got tired. She let herself fall back on the bed, taking Cindy down with her. The movement broke their kiss, and it was a miracle that they didn’t accidentally bite their lips as they fell into bed. But they didn’t mind if it was messy, if it was an imperfect moment. For them, it couldn’t have been better. They laughed wholeheartedly, and then they were back to kissing. Alice wrapped her arms around Cindy’s waist, and Cindy reciprocated by tangling a hand in Alice’s hair. Personal changes and life-changing problems could wait. Shadyside and the entire world would have to wait too. There was a couple of best friends figuring out how perfectly they fit together and how much they had really wanted to kiss each other.