#“divine power” of catchin' a giant ass whoopin'

[badjohnspeakeasy]

Time for a Crackpot Theory (Webcomic Spoilers)

One-Punch Man Webcomic readers might remember this guy. The Neo Leader and Great Prophet Infelsinave, founder of the Church of Otherworldly Reincarnation. He had nearly a million loyal followers, and he joined the Neo Heroes to fight for justice or something.

I don't think he ever said a single fuggin' word, so I guess if one wanted to list his positive traits, you could call him stoic and humble.

His fighting abilities were probably negligeable, other than the well-built suit of armor underneath his regal robes, but he was elected a Neo Leader due to his admittedly vast influence.

He had divine powers, whatever that means.

To be quite honest, I use the phrase "might remember" because he's pretty forgettable.

He was murdered recently.

As you can see, he had a tough go of it during his first battle and wound up dead in the road.

I'm here to give the prophet his due and investigate his murder a little. Let's put on our detective hats and examine the evidence.

He got a hole punched in his Neo Hero armor by a monster.

The monster killed him, then bounced. It's quite possible that's all it was; a monster saw Infelsinave, brutally ran him through, then walked away.

But notice that his homies were there to witness the murder. A horde of allies who were as weak as Infelsinave survived the attack without so much as being looked at by the murderer.

Are monsters usually that selective? No! Monsters are typically connoisseurs of surplus killing, like weasels targeting hordes of hapless mice.

So, why didn't the monster go on to maul the rest of the Neo Heroes present? Why were the other humans on-scene not worth its aggression?

So, that's my first piece of evidence; the monster seemed to have a grudge against Lord Infelsinave specifically.

But we don't know a single person with enmity towards Lord Infelsinave, do we? He had a lot of followers, which means he probably had plenty of detractors. Maybe there was a monster who hated cult leaders? In that case, we'd have no idea who killed him.

But what if, and bear with me on this, the monster didn't have a beef with Infelsinave in particular?

What if the monster was looking for a different person, and mistook Infelsinave for someone we know a little better?

I have a long-shot theory; whatever attacked Infelsinave was actually hunting our friendly neighborhood Saitama.

Both are bald, both wear flowing garments (Saitama's cape, and Infelsinave's dorky cloak), and though their similarities are only passing, Saitama has a bland enough look that Infelsinave's attacker might have made the honest mistake of killing the Neo Leader like a dog without taking a closer gander for Saitama's trademark perfunctory visage.

Now, who has the power to smash through Neo Hero armor like butter, a grudge against Saitama, and the speed to assault Infelsinave and leave before his Neo Hero squad could react?

Well...any Demon-level monster, really. Awakened Cockroach, Bug God, Royal Ripper, or even the Lion Eating Zebra could probably speedblitz Infelsinave and leave, unfraught by any Neo Goon resistance.

But I have a theory.

It was THIS GUY. The Ninja Village Leader!

He has the skills,

he has the motive,

and he's so unfamiliar with Saitama that mistaking Infelsinave for him would be believable.

Call me a gormless gumshoe. Mistake my detective hat for tin-foil. But I'd bet a fat Hamilton ($10) that the Ninja Village Leader is the culprit who eliminated Infelsinave, and he did it under the mistaken belief that he was taking down Saitama, the man who beat him up and stole all his cool ninja stuff.

Mystery solved!

"But BadJohn, Infelsinave is alive!"

No he's not. That's baloney. That guy is a fucking robot husk designed to fool his followers and steal all his money.

I'm not crazy, YOU'RE crazy