#♡Gale slander

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Making memes about the fic I'm supposed to be writing instead of making memes.

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OMFGGGG FRRRR if Karlach or anyone grabbed my butt and told everyone “how lucky I am to have such a hot piece of ass” I’d die. like i would need to be put on life support fr. women ❤️❤️❤️❤️ (although irl i think it would be a major ick and would break up, but alas, fantasies are different)

Fantasy toxic misogyny done BY hot women is something you'll have to claw out of my dead cold hands.

Karlach should absolutely make me her little stay in house girlfriend and just cook her meals and give her muscles a massage every now and then before she bends me over.

Minthara could order me to never speak unless I'm spoke to and i will literally zip it forever.

Shadowheart has every right to make me wear lipstick before kissing her all over and leaving marks on here skin.

Jaheira definitely should slut shame me for always looking so fuckable and putting so much effort into my appearance just so she gets to ruin it alongside my back.

Gale could insinuate that i should wear shorter skirts and I'd stomp him to death.

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I feel like Lae'zel would be the most understanding and pleasent to deal with if you're having a bpd episode.

She knows not to take things at face value, not to let things cloud her judgement. If you act irrationally she'd focus more on the source cause of it rather than the hurtful words, yelling or even emotional outbursts.

She is efficient, tactical, and surprisingly kind in her own way. She'd know there is a deeper reason on why you're feeling the way you are, on why something seemingly small snapped you off so much.

And even if there wasn't something deeper, even if it was just this one small thing. She'd take you seriously, listen even if she doesn't understand or see your views.

-

On the other hand Gale would be fucking insufferable to deal with during a bpd episode.

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Discord mod Gale x uwu kitten Reader

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No one is braver than my Gale fans followers.

I've put that man through the trenches in my blog, how come you guys are still here and watching? That's admirable.

Anyway, next thing coming up, top ten Tom&Jerry traps that I think Gale would fall victim to.

Number one, any trap involving cheese, that man will sing song "oh! Splendid! Don't mind if i do!" Then have an iron anvel dropped on his head, making him 2D for a while.

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Putting Gale's animation on others is always so funny because they look goofy on anyone besides him

He has such bad posture too

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by 8 str losers mean 8 strength?! I fully thought y’all were saying 8 straight losers and I was so confused I was like “there’s not 8 of them??”💀

I CAN'T ODHQODHISJD ANON I LOVE YOU.

The 8 straight losers who are actually only 3 and not even straight.

Yeah i mean strength.

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Gale you will forever be cucked man, take it like it is

Footage of Larian making the most cuckheld man in the history of the universe just to name him Gale.

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pov idea: tav, karlach and lae'zel watching the three 8 str losers trying to contain were!shart from afar and betting on who loses like a football match ☠️

lae'zel would probably deem this as "mandatory strength / fighting training" for the 8 str losers

The 8 str loser trinity omfg, like literally even my own Sorcerer Tav had 12 strength bc I didn't want them to be a weak ass bitch.

How can three whole grown men not have +1 bonus to strength rolls between them??? Not even a 0, just a straight up -1.

Minthara can bench press them is what I'm saying. She'd beat the three of them at once with one arm behind her back.

Idc what their cuck intelligence, dex or charisma does, my primal human unga bunga brain sees muscles and neurons get activated.

The bet wouldn't be about who would win, it would be about who would end up with the least amount of broken bones.

5 seconds in and Gale is immediately complaining about his knees, Astarion breaks off a nail from attempting to lift an actual sword instead of a dagger and Wyll is hunched over from his back giving out after lifting one of Shadowheart's shields.

Minsc and Halsin stay the true gigachad alphas fr fr.

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not gale getting cucked by wyll for you oman ☠️☠️

Gale of waterdeep? More like Gale of cuckedeep.

His job is to stand in the corner and memorise all the spells my sorcerer thought were too useless to use, also he better have his tits and childbearing hips on display too or he's going back to the cage.

Meme from here

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Gale would see someone run off a cliff, clearly see through the trick and cast feather fall, but wouldn't notice the comically large bear trap waiting at the bottom because he was too busy thinking about how he avoided the first trap

And that's number three, 10/10.

Also there was an invisible bridge, two steps away from where Gale decided to jump with feather fall. Where the cartoon character who ran off stands on air, holding a sign they pulled out of their pocket that reads "Don't look down."

He ends up split in half, with two half Gales running around in panic like headless chickens until they collide and a full Gale pops out again.

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Ok so on my first playthrough I went in to romance Gale but then Shart happened and I loved every minute of it. Second playthrough and started out with Gale but then I got the Wyll dance scene and now I want to romance him. SJDJFKKF I’m so sorry to Gale oml

By the time you get around to romancing Gale, Gortash and Alfria would've released as alternative romance routes.

I'm actually trying to do his romance route rn but i keep getting distracted by Karlach and Laezel-

Poor Gale, doomed to the cuck corner forever.

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in a cucking contest among the three 8 STR losers who is the most cucked loser out of the three?

-8str cucking anon

Gale.

Not only did he get cucked so much in my fics, but he was cucked irl by Wyll who made me forget about him at the start of the game.

Minthara is Gale's number one Hater.

Also, he was getting cucked with Mystra by literally every other wizard she was sleeping with at the time. Even his old buddy pal Elminster was hitting it on the regular.

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ngl when I first saw Gale in game I was like wow, this man is hella good looking WITH A PIERCING ESPECIALLY

simped so hard and he has been in my party since

I had the opposite reaction, maybe bc early access Gale was a mess. He is in camp for me to bully and pick on. Wanna stuff his nerd wizard ass into a locker ngl. Tho I do see his charms, he is like a great aged block of cheese.

BUT WYLL? MAMAMIA that man single handedly could almost fix me and my fucked up Tavs who always kill the grove for the drussy. Even losing Halsin wasn't as painful as losing Wyll.

Literally everytime I saw him and spoke to him my heart would flutter, he is so 🌸🪻🌸🪷🪻🪷🌸🪻🌸🪷🐝🐛🪻🌸🐝🪷🪻🌸🌺🌺🩷🪷🩷

It reached an almost embarrassing degree of puppy love crush that I had to stop talking to him so I don't ruin my Astarion romance. Idk how Laezel and Shadowheart held on, the second Wyll uses his shitty lame flirting on me i would fold like a plastic chair.

Basically, what i feel towards Gale is what Mizora feels about Wyll.

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If all the poly companions ended up in a relationship with you, you'd end up with each type of elf as a harem.

Wood elf - Halsin

Drow - Minthara

High elf - Astarion

Half-elf - Shadowheart

Like I'm sorry Gale but yes I am definitely willing to be shared and tossed around like a loaf of bread during supper. Me and my gaggle of weed smoking elf lovers will definitely make this work much better than your old fashioned way could.

It's also kinda of funny that it's just the elves that are such whores for open relationships. They are never beating the allegations of having druid orgies in the woods.

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Gale is a bottom you can't convince me otherwise. A pathetic bottom he deserves to be cucked - Shadowheart anon

This is a Gale degradation blog.

Chop chop wand boy go sit in the cuck corner while reader gets gangbanged by all these dom mommies.