#(but also lol not only did half of my immediate family die in short time. my hOUSE BURNED DOWN IN THE SAME STRETCH OF TIME!!!) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

pepperpixel · 2 years

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Smiling pastrys… she has like a quota, she’ll do 1 smile every 2 months and that’s IT… she is not a smiley person. But I noticed I’ve basically only ever drawn her upset so, I wanted to try and shake it up! Draw some of those rarely seen smiles.. (even if one of them is like a creepy “let me tell you about my cult” smile. It’s still a smile!)

#cookie run kingdom #cookie run #pastry cookie #crk #doodles #she would be the type to laugh w a hand over her mouth..#anyway I’m lov her ghghg.#I think I love her so much because my own life is suffering. and there is SO much potential for suffering in her life #like I look at her and I’m like ‘oh ur entire life could fall apart around u too.’#like I mean! and obviously her life would fall apart for diff reasons then mine. mine is that half of my immediate family died #and I’m including myself in the other half that lived so. rlly if I’m not included it’s more then half lol #but hers would be like. getting ostrascized and hunted down by her own religious group. that she thought she could trust #having everything she believes called into question.#but. still.. total breakdown of the status qou of life. total uncertainty of the future #total feeling of ‘what even is the point of the future. of my existence’#I’m like. this girl has all the pieces in place for that. I see it. in my mind #but! that’s not the only reason I like her ghgh #I think it’s just one of the reasons I’ve rlly latched onto her at this specific point in my life ghgh #anyway. sorry for rambling about pain and suffering in my ‘pastry actually having an ok time’ art post gGHG #(but also lol not only did half of my immediate family die in short time. my hOUSE BURNED DOWN IN THE SAME STRETCH OF TIME!!!)#(like I have a fucking. Mary sue baby’s first oc level of tragic backstory. like it would be criticized for being ‘unrealistic’ in fiction)#(or ‘too dark’ or something. like 1 tragic backstory was enough u didn’t have to kill BOTH her grandparents. and burn down her house)#(one of those would have been sufficient suffering!)#(I’m sorry I try not to talk about that stuff too much on her. and not to be a downer w it)#(but it almost feels like. idk. I have to acknowledge sometimes. putting on a face that everything is fine just like. feels awful)#(I don’t wanna talk about it too much tho. but. it’s awful ghghg. I’ll get thru it tho)#(and I’m in a better place now then I was like a month ago. but it’s still rough)#(so yeah sorry if there’s too much information on my personal suffering in these tags gGHG- I just! I have to talk about the suffering #I can’t pretend it’s not there. that makes me feel even more like shit.)#(I mean. I can pretend MOST of the time. so I’m not a total downer. but I can’t do it all the time lol)

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