#(no it is not they/them Capn 3 it's more... complicated than that)

[squidkidnerd]

Man, with how vague Splatoon is about its lore/plot points sometimes, I’m very wary of people who claim there is One Definitive Interpretation of this that or the other thing. Like no, just because the game uses they/them pronouns for Captain 3 doesn't mean giving them any other pronouns is misgendering. Like, unless you have something from actual canon (ie. the games themselves or dev interviews) to back it up, then I don't think it's fair to expect people to Universally Agree With You or Else. Going "This is how I see things, I really don't like it when people see it this other way" is fine but "This is how I see things, I am RIGHT and anyone who thinks otherwise is WRONG" is not. People have different opinions. You are not obligated to agree with them, but at the same time, they are not obligated to agree with you.

[finchsflight]

Auld Lang Syne

@capn-twitchery dragged me into actually posting this :pensive: mean to me and forcing me to acknowledge my skills and share my work with the wider flumblr community. please be nice to me anyway here's what the Vengeful Investigator is doing on New Year's <3

unfortunately my Fancy Screenplay Formatting absolutely exploded when I tried to use it on Tumblr so you're not getting any fun exciting centred words. suffer

EXT. A DECOMMISSIONED STEAMER — MIDNIGHT The camera opens on the VENGEFUL INVESTIGATOR from behind, who’s tall, pale-skinned, and has short, dark brown hair with a few grey streaks pulled back into a messy bun. Their bun’s held in place by a pair of sharp-looking spikes, and they’re wearing a long coat flapping in the zee-wind. They’re standing on the deck of their steamer, hands resting on the railing. There’s a bottle of wine, two glasses, and a candle on a small table lashed to the deck with old ropes. It’s the only notable light source, other than the pale light of the false-stars overhead. A rifle leans against the side of the boat.  They pull a dented, plain steel locket out from under their shirt, flicking it open to reveal a sepia-toned picture of two people, presumably siblings given how similar they look. The brother has paler, curlier hair, a brighter suit, and a wider grin, with his arm slung around the other’s shoulders. The other’s smile is a little smaller, although no less fond, and their hair is in a fanciful style. They’re wearing a darker suit. They both look to be young adults, and neither has any scars. THE VENGEFUL INVESTIGATOR Sorry I’m not done yet. This whole business has been more complicated than I expected.

They sigh, closing the locket and tucking it back into their shirt, and turning around towards the table. It's the first time the camera sees their face; they’re one of the siblings from the picture, the one with the less-bright suit and the smaller smile, but their features are harsher than they were in the picture, they’re a bit older, and they’re paler, like they’ve been out of the sun for a long time. They have a noticeable scar on their face, too, bisecting one eyebrow and just grazing the corner of their eye. They are not smiling.  They walk over to the wine glasses and flick their wrist. A dagger made of dark glass comes out of their sleeve, and they use it to uncork the bottle, pouring two glasses and carrying them over to the railing.  THE VENGEFUL INVESTIGATOR I can’t imagine your favorite vintage has changed.  They take a sip of the glass in their left hand, and drop the other one off the side of the steamer. Distantly, the glass shatters, and they swirl the wine in their glass. THE VENGEFUL INVESTIGATOR You tried so hard to find one I’d like,  and now here I am. The only wine I’m fond of and it’s only by the nostalgia of you making me try it… They trail off, staring at the glass and taking another sip. THE VENGEFUL INVESTIGATOR It’s hard to find Surface wines down here.  I can’t imagine I’ll drink this again once the bottle’s done. The Investigator laughs, bitterly. THE VENGEFUL INVESTIGATOR You’d be so irritated with me. Drinking  alone… well, I’m sorry, but here we are.  They raise their glass up to the false-stars, and then drink the last of it.  THE VENGEFUL INVESTIGATOR I’d say you’ll see me soon, but I don’t think we’re headed to the same place. CUT