#* ˖ ·ﾟ STEFAN SALVATORE ╱ threads ❣

[dcmoniism]

@malka-lisitsa , continued from here.

with katherine turning in his arms, stefan tightens the hold around her waist, keeping her pressed to his figure. “ hm... you could be spending time with me, definitely. ” the youngest salvatore brother continues with a smile, his thumb smoothing over her lower back — a habit he had picked up, and one he doubted katherine minded considering she never questioned it nor told him to stop.

stefan salvatore wasn't one to ask for attention, not directly anyway, but he'd drop subtle hints — and become far more affectionate than the usual. he doesn't say anything else, he needn't do so. stefan leans in to capture her lips, humming softly into the kiss — that felt right, that was exactly what he'd been waiting for all night long. maybe he should have made a move sooner. it's not long before he slipping his hands beneath the back of her shirt — stefan needed to feel her.

[dcmoniism]

@malka-lisitsa , based on our discord conversation.

the writing below 'read more' contains mentions of following : c-ptsd, abuse, death, mention of a corpse, blood mentions.

complex post-traumatic stress disorder : a mental health condition that can develop if one experiences chronic trauma ; and stefan salvatore fit the mold perfectly. from the moment he arrived in this world, stefan was dealt the hardest of cards, and pills, to swallow : an abusive family. he was often spared by a weakened lillian, rejected by giuseppe and damon who blamed his arrival for the loss of the matriarch. no one understood him, his needs, and the ongoing rejection, dismissal, avoidance certainly didn't help the young boy. one thing was certain, he was set for doom right from the start.

stefan learnt from a young age to bottle things within; to keep his emotions and feelings to himself — and the lack of control over such paired with several other circumstances and conditions meant that he was unable to cope, understand and regulate his emotions as one would. stefan kept quiet, until it overflowed, and whenever it did, he lost absolute control of himself, his actions, his shred of humanity. hearing the call of his name had him stop. he would recognise that call anywhere.

dropping the lifeless corpse, the salvatore turns to face her, and if he'd been in his usual, composed, mannered self, it would have been obvious the slightly sank in, darkened light green eyes, the tear stained cheeks from absolute despair, but the biggest clue to something being off, wrong, was the blood trickling down his chin to the ground after he drained yet another corpse.

perhaps it's the way she looks at him, but stefan feels akin to a deer in lights — was she disappointed? concerned? he doesn't say anything. instead, he just searched for answers in her gaze and in the silence that settled afterwards. he was a monster, and whenever his composure and control was lost, stefan was dangerous even : to others and himself.

[dcmoniism]

@malka-lisitsa ; another steferine thing continued from here !!

stefan folds his arms and leans against the door frame quietly as he listens to her explanation. not all the terrible things that took place were her doing, he knows that. unfortunately, most of the time, they were actually damon's doing and he had to step in for his older sibling and apologise, make it up to people in whatever way he could. frankly, this time, maybe he too was caught up in all of it to think, right off the bat, that katherine could have been involved.

moving away from the door frame, stefan uncrosses his arms and makes his way towards her - closing the little existent gap between them. he grabs her chin, tilting her head up slightly to meet his gaze and for a moment there, he is absolutely silent. though he knows her doe eyes are ever so common, they were still different. staring right into hers felt different.

" i wasn't reprimanding you. " he clarifies with a small smile. there was no point in doing so anyway. katherine was unpredictable, and although it sometimes lead to complications, he actually grew to enjoy such unpredictability. " if it wasn't you, " which he believed it wasn't since she told him so, " someone is trying to replicate your moves, and doing a pretty good job. damon and i were both confused. " considering they had him - of all people - fooled, he is certain it has to be someone close to her.

[dcmoniism]

OPEN STARTER : 1864 - STEFAN SALVATORE.

ragged breathing echoed throughout the old boarding house. heavy footsteps sounded throughout the wooden floorboards as he moved. pearl white canines stained with crimson red, as this one trickled down his chin to stain his ironed, and once pristine, white button-up shirt. stefan's eyes wandered — searching for anything, anyone that moved and dared to cross his murderous path. stefan was no longer the innocent, rejected, abandoned boy they had left behind. no. he was no longer the boy that hid away from giuseppe when this one got one drop too many of his favourite alcoholic beverages. he was no longer the boy that cried himself to sleep wondering why his mother had left him with two careless, cold men with whomst he was to learn to live with. he was no longer the family's good-for-nothing, disgrace of a child.

“ wait, please, no!— ” and then, all that echoed were blood curdling, spine chilling screams. the agony, the horror, the fear were palpable. the terror stefan salvatore spread was unimaginable. how? how could such a sweet boy tear them apart limb for limb? before the loss of control, before the pain, there was sorrow. there was a never-ending 'why me' that never obtained an answer. there was a boy who was wronged, abandoned by those he needed most, abused in all the ways one could be. the young salvatore's emotions ran at the very surface of his being after his transition into a creature of the night — one he had not asked for, but could not complain about given the power it provided him. stefan gained the power to turn his life around, to make a name, a reputation for himself away from the salvatore family name. away from giuseppe, away from damon.

katherine had provided a way out for a boy that had been caged all his life. she unleashed his deepest and darkest thoughts, made them a reality. his reality. the next sound echoing throughout the house is the sound of something heavy dropping to the wooden floorboards. his sleeve drags along his mouth, attempting to wipe away the remnants of his father's blood from his lips. his mind was clear, empty, blank. stefan did not have the capacity to understand what he had done in that moment, nor did he want to. what he knew was that, now, there was a chance for freedom. whatever that word meant.

instead of fleeing the scene, stefan reaches for his wrist and drags him across the floor from the office to the living room, in front of the fireplace. his gaze is fixated on him for a few moments, before he back steps his way to the couch, and sits there. it takes hours for stefan's gaze to return to its beautiful emerald colour, but they never leave giuseppe's deceased figure. their blood still sits on his chin, now dry. that was payback, for all that he had to endure, for the pain of the belt he still felt against his skin, the agony of the daily blame for the loss of lillian, the sleepless nights wondering where he had gone wrong, what he had done wrong. it ended then, or so, stefan thought.

“ stefan? ” the call of his name has his ears twitching, but he does not move to respond to the caller nor their call. if he looks away, will he get up from the ground and charge at him? was he actually gone? stefan did not buy it — how could he when even the end of the bottle, day in day out, did not take him down?

[dcmoniism]

"It's not a crime to love what you can't explain." -for stefan

to: stefan salvatore.

yet, it felt like it. “ it feels wrong. she looks exactly like her. ” elena, that was. she looked exactly like katherine, and yet, they were so different. katherine, almost two centuries ago, was cunning, ambitious. stefan once loved katherine, as much as he denied such. now, elena was... soft, fresh air, love. elena was a newfound, delicate definition of love that stefan had longed for. “ when i'm with elena, i can't help but remember her, because they look so alike, and i hold back. ” because elena didn't deserve that. she deserved someone that looked at her as if she were the only one for them, and stefan wasn't sure he could do that. “ i think i love her... and i can't explain why, or what draws me to her. ” could it be her looks? was stefan drawn to her... because she looked like his first love?

[dcmoniism]

black heart for Stefan

to: stefan salvatore.

attractiveness:

repulsive / hideous / ugly / not attractive / unappealing / not unattractive / meh / no preference / ok / mildly attractive / nice looking / cute / adorable / attractive / pleasant on the eyes / good looking / hot / sexy / beautiful / gorgeous / hot damn / would tap that / perfect / godlike / holy fuck there are no words.

personality:

grating / irritating / frustrating / boring / confusing at best / awkward / unreasonable / psychotic / disturbing / interesting / engaging / affectionate / aggressive / ambitious / anxious / artistic / bad tempered / bossy / charismatic / appealing / unappealing / creative / courageous / dependable / unreliable / unpredictable / predictable / devious / dim / extroverted / introverted / egotistical / gregarious / fabulous / impulsive / intelligent / sympathetic / talkative / up beat / peaceful / calming / badass / flexible.

how likely they would have sex with them:

not if they were the last person on earth and the world was ending / fuck no! / never / no way / not likely / not sure / indifferent / I’m asexual / maybe / probably / it depends / fairly likely / likely / yeah sure / yes / would tap that / hell yes / fuck yes! / wishing that could happen right now / as many times as possible / we are already having sex.

level of friendship:

never in a million years / worst of enemies / enemies / rivals / indifferent / neutral / acquaintance / friendly toward each other / casual friends / friends / good friends / best friends / fuck buddies / bosom buddies / practically the same person / would die for them / true friends / my only friend.

first impression of them:

i hate them so much / i don’t like them / i don’t trust them / they annoy me / they’re weird / I’m indifferent / meh / they seem alright / they’re growing on me / truce / I think I like them / I like them / I’m not sure if I trust them / I trust them / they’re cool / they’re genuine / I think we’re going to get along / I really like them / I think I’m in love / oh fuck they’re hot / I love them.

current impression of them:

i hate them so much / i don’t like them / i don’t trust them / they annoy me / they’re weird / I’m indifferent / meh / they seem alright / they’re growing on me / truce / I think I like them / I like them / I’m not sure if I trust them / I trust them / they’re cool / they’re genuine / I think we’re going to get along / I really like them / I think I’m in love / oh fuck they’re hot / I love them.