#... that was the single hardest meta post i've ever done and i'm not doing that again. damn.

[dirtyoldmanhole]

revelation loveblog with a gunter focus, ch26, 4/4.

this one's the last big one and deals with some really heavy topics, not kidding, so take a drink and/or a break if you need to.

where we left off: corrin defeats gunter.

this is another one of those perfectly framed shots that does such a good job of capturing the emotional subtext.

gunter is cornered.

the big bad divine god that he thought he had (anankos) is silent, leaving him alone to die, watching him as judgmentally in the background as the other royals.

he expects no mercy, still, as a traitor.

there's a bit in my fic (sorry i'll be saying that a lot) where strictly speaking, by nohrian and hoshidan justice codes he'd almost certinally be executed for his actions this day.

remember what I said about the desperation and despair starting to sink in? you really see it here. anankos is still influencing him, but you see the man underneath panic.

gunter has always been prepared (and i truly believe, wanted to) die honorably on the battlefield.

he does not want to die like a cornered animal.

note he's holding a sword now. that's about to get important. (all nohrian knights likely have a sword on them even if they favor lances like he does, or axes.)

Azura starts singing her healing song.

it's a bloody fantastic idea since she's capable of swaying minds with her songstress magic, and it's always been a "good" foil to Anankos' warped magic.

and ....

it's working. partially at least. good on xander for noticing this, too. he's becoming a remarkably decent leader in his own right.

(apologies for the javelin in azura's hand breaking immersion a bit)

the camera angles are exquisite, and absolutely heartbreaking here.

:")

it's notable she doesn't just stop at the bare minimum of what the game outlined as his duties. gunter really went above and beyond in raising her.

(so, yes I have thoughts(tm) about that discipline line, ironically not even in the iddy sense but it's complicated so put a pin for that in a different meta post later.)

that's significant. titles come back.

this time... it's not explicit, but i would bet you cash money it's done out of genuine respect for her, not rote. he's fighting against anankos.

for all of his legitimate resentments, there's that part of him that really does treasure those happy memories.

it's particularly bittersweet/telling considering how much memory is its own traumatic arc for corrin, too, with her mind wipes.

the fact they both hang on so tightly to those moments as an anchor?

...

...

at the last second - he stabs himself with the sword in a fatal disemboweling wound...

...

... and we see black smoke rise out of him in a very explicit gesture that anankos has finally left his mind and body for good, thanks to corrin and azura's efforts.

you ever research disemboweling wounds?

there's a reason why it's consistently ranked up there as one of the ugliest ways to die.

...

(note the title again below)

...

gunter collapses.

...

corrin calls over the healers, and this time, they're able to save him.

...

so.

here's the thing. this is more interpretation/fic stuff, but--

i've always had the long-standing conviction that possession would leave emotional scars remarkably similar to sexual assault given the type of mental violation. (this also had the semi-intentional result of paralleling with Corrin’s mind wipes which is also a violation of a very similar kind. it's a big theme in the fic.)

something else that's a big theme there, and i hope, not without reason, because i see it all over his arc here in revelation - is dignity.

dignity, or the lack thereof.

gunter's a very proud man of his generation; pretty much every time we see him elsewhere in the game there's a consistent focus on control and discipline.

garon was the one that broke him first, but there were many, many instances afterwards that just ground him in the dust, particularly with anankos. here, he doesn't even have the dignity of privacy anymore; he's got the people who he hates the absolute most, watching all of this.

my point here is he is truly at his absolute lowest.

no wonder his endings strongly imply he offs himself after the game.

'revelation's the golden route for everyone' my fucking ass

...

back to the game, sakura/elise heal/stablize him, and he's able to talk again, barely. but at least he's out from under anankos' possession.

here comes the whammers.

gunter decides to come clean.

this isn't for anyone else's benefit. this is just for corrin's.

you know, i just realized. how the hell does he react when he realizes she's a dragon on top of being a thrice-cursed royal? (back eventually when he meets her in the bottomless canyon.)

dragon "anything" (especially with anankos now) was and is going to have some real unpleasant connotations for him.

...

and there it is.

...

"once / was also"

you know, that sure implies garon forced gunter to watch. not just arriving on the aftermath of the scene.

jesus fuck.

....

fuck.

...

...

ngh, that "you all".

yeah, I called it again with that resentment and him absolutely throwing Corrin in there too. it's complicated with her-- there's a reason she's the only one that was able to bring him back at all-- but not for one moment has he ever forgotten that she's a royal too.

here's the other interesting thing. he never tells corrin about his dead wife and kid in conquest's married route with her, even when it's ostensibly "her dad"" that does it.

i don't think it's him being deceptive as much as ... he's satisfied when corrin kills garon, and this is such an old scar that hurts that badly that he just straight up takes it to his grave.

literally the only time we hear is now, against his will.

he bares his soul to you all, and that is you react? jesus, that's tasteless.

fucking christ alive, get your heads out of your arses for once and quit fucking thinking about yourselves.

...

ngh.

..

aaaand there's the other big whammer.

note that he says this when he's not possessed. this isn't anankos twisting a resentment and jacking it sky high to ""debatably"" a falsehood. this is 100% the truth from the horse's mouth.

now, mind, it's not the whole truth.

he would not have let corrin bring him back from the absolute brink if there was nothing but hatreds and resentment - there's undying love, affection, and i genuinely believe, yes devotion there.

but yeah, their relationship is complicated as fuck.

okay, so I've talked before about how this chunk is actually different depending on m!corrin/f!corrin existing in terms of this strongly implying he holds a romantic flame for f!corrin even on revelation's route and not just conquest.

that said that's more of a 'ship manifesto' tangent, and I'd like to focus just on him for this post.

corrin, babe, i don't think you really understand, but props to you for giving a shit. that actually does mean a lot.

we're almost done.

corrin's giving him a remarkably gentle pep talk so he doesn't turn around and disembowel himself again.

that was absolutely the right tack to take.

corrin gets it here. she remembers his family. that more than anything, is what convinces him to stay on for this one last gauntlet to kill anankos for good.

ellipses strike again. given the turmoil he's going through, it makes sense.

...

there'll be one shorter post capturing everything end/post-game, but nothing to this degree.

thanks for reading.

[fakeikemen]

Katara's Grief

(This is my first attempt at a meta post and I know that this has probably been already done but I just needed to get it off my chest and go on a little rant and it kinda got long so bear with me.)

A lot of the hate on Katara stems from the fact that she keeps on mentioning her mother's death at every chance she gets and invalidates other people's pain to assert that her suffering is the worst of the lot.

And even though everybody is entitled to their own opinions, I'm gonna point out why I think the aforesaid claims are not exactly correct.

First we'll take a look at; Katara's Backstory:

We know that Kya is killed in a fire nation raid and that Katara had been the last person to see her alive before she leaves the tent on her mother's insistence. Only to come back a few moments later and find her dead body. This, in itself is a traumatising event.

So yes, her mother died. Other people in the story go through far worse. You're not wrong when you say that.

But what is more important in Katara's story is the aftermath of her mother's death.

As Sokka says while talking to Toph in "The Runaway" in B3 Ep7:

Sokka: When our mom died, that was the hardest time in my life. Our family was a mess, but Katara? She had so much strength. She stepped up and took on so much responsibility. She helped fill the void that was left by our mom.

As an eight year old, she had to force herself to grow up to step into her mother's shoes and raise herself and her elder brother and simultaneously look after the entire village after her father left to fight in the war. She had to do all of it by herself.

In face of all her responsibilities, she never really had the chance to simply be a grieving child lamenting the loss of her mother. She habituated herself to caring more about others than herself (We see this trait in the entire series as she acts as the stand-in mom friend for the entire Gaang with an exception of Suki and Zuko). She ended up bottling her feelings of grief, resentment, guilt and rage deep within herself.

She had to give up an extensive part of her childhood where most children focus on figuring themselves out, to become a mature and responsible person who was working as the immovable pillar holding up the family and even the whole village not much later.

She put up a strong front to help others and pretended to be fine even though she was hurting inside the whole time.

She could never find any closure from the situation. She never got over it.

Moving on to the criticisms:

1. Katara keeps on mentioning her mother like a broken record:

Here are the number of times Katara mentions her mother's death (not sure if that's all of it, lmk if there are any others):

1. In her first scene with Sokka

Katara: Ever since mom died, I've been doing all the work around camp while you've been off playing soldier!

2. A short while after she meets Aang

Katara: Well, I just want you to be prepared for what you might see. The Fire Nation is ruthless. They killed my mother, and they could have done the same to your people.

3. A short while after she meets Haru

Katara: I lost my mother in a Fire Nation raid. This necklace is all I have left of her.

4. A short while after she meets Jet

Katara: Sokka and I lost our mother to the Fire Nation.

5. In the swamp after she sees a vision of her mother

Katara: I thought I saw Mom.

6. In the Crystal Catacombs with Zuko

Katara: I don't? How dare you! You have no idea what this war has put me through! Me personally! The Fire Nation took my mother away from me.

7. A short while after she meets Hama

Katara: We completely understand. We lost our mother in a raid.

8. Repeated mentions in The Southern Raiders episode

(Most of the episode basically)

The first mention with Sokka is in the middle of a siblings' spat where she tells off Sokka for trying to act as if he were superior when it was obvious that in the face of the gaping hole that was left by Kya's sudden death, Katara had shouldered much more responsibility.

When she tells it to Aang, she uses it as a proof that the Fire Nation is capable of immense cruelty and destruction.

The Gaang travel all around the world and meet different people affected by the war in different ways. So when Haru, Jet and Hama narrate their own stories, Katara sympathises with them and talks about Kya's death in lieu of "I understand, the Fire Nation hurt me too."

After they got separated, Aang, Sokka and Katara each had their visions and after they get back together, they all mention their visions and so does Katara.

When left alone in catacombs with Zuko, whom she considered as the face of the Fire Nation— the same Fire Nation that had her mother killed and forced her father to leave to fight in the war, she has a meltdown where she rightfully accuses him of all the bad things he's done and then breaks down while talking about how the war has cost her i.e., by causing her mother's death.

The Southern Raiders is the episode where Katara hunts down the man responsible for her mother's death. If you think mentioning Kya repeatedly in this episode is uncalled for, then I don't know what to tell you.

In all the incidents mentioned above, Katara mentioning her mother's death is a very natural occurrence is the respective conversations. She mostly talks about Kya's death to either extend her sympathy or to use it as an example of the ruthlessness of the Fire Nation.

Another fact to be noted is that 70% of the Gaang's storyline is followed via Katara from a narrative point of view. Plus, being the mom-friend, she acts as the spokesperson. Considering that Kya's death is a major event that played a huge role in shaping Katara's life and is also the source of her severe, unresolved trauma, which acts as the driving force of her story, it is only natural that she brings up this topic whenever she is engaging in a deeper conversation.

It is us as the viewers who have seen her from the start and already know about her mother's death and we see her talking to multiple people about it. Which is why it might come across as repetitive to some people.

While, Kya's death is not necessary information that everyone needs to know, Katara talking about it never comes across as a forced or unnatural.

2. Katara invalidates others' pain because she thinks she has suffered the most:

First of all, if anything, Katara is the most empathetic person of them all. As the mom-friend of the group, not only is she their constant moral support, she also helps them untangle and sort out their own feelings. She is also able to tap into issues that aren't said out loud.

Instances of Katara helping and supporting Aang, emotionally are uncountable.

She is the first one to notice Sokka's sour mood in B3 Ep4 "Sokka's Master". And even though his insecurities seem baseless, she validates him (by saying "I'm sorry you're feeling so down" instead of something like "That's a dumb thing to say") and knows exactly what to do to cheer him up.

In B3 Ep7 "The Runaway" she has the insight to understand that Toph's unruly behaviour is caused by the mixed feelings she has about her parents even though Toph's herself never talked about it.

She even reaches out to Zuko in B2 Ep19 "Crossroads of Destiny" even though she used to think of him as the face of the enemy.

But then there's The Southern Raiders.

Ah yes, that episode where Katara is extremely OOC and a total b*tch.

Agreed that she said some things that she definitely shouldn't have said. But like, she's just 14?? And has been hurting on the inside since she was 8?? And pretended to be fine just for the sake of other people?? Like, there's a limit to how much she can have her shit under control?? And she did a real good job of Sokka's upbringing and taking care of the village and taking care of Gaang on her own?? Some people out there are really willing to forget everything she has ever done just because she was mean for 5 minutes?? A traumatised 14 yo shouldn't be villianised and called toxic because she got mad and lashed out at people that one time??

But here's my take on the scene anyway:

When Aang gets to know that she's going to go face her mother's killer:

Aang: Um ... and what exactly do you think this will accomplish?

Katara: I knew you wouldn't understand. 

Aang is a non-confrontational person who prefers running away from difficult situations as opposed to Katara who firmly stands her ground and is never afraid of confrontations. Katara had approached Aang only hoping that he would understand. But going by his dismissal, he obviously doesn't understand the burning need that she has to confront the man who had single-handedly destroyed her childhood. (Most people infer that what Katara means is that she thinks that Aang doesn't understand the pain of losing people. And so does Aang, I guess)

But things start getting even more tricky when:

Aang: Katara, you sound like Jet.

In all honesty, this is probably the most insensitive thing that she could've heard from anyone right then, let alone one of her closest friends. Hearing herself being compared to a homicidal maniac just because she wants to avenge her mother's killer. (No, I'm not justifying murder but there's a clear difference between homicide and avenging someone's death. And Aang may not be my favourite character but I do love him but this wasn't really a good thing to say either. And he wasn't even mentally distressed in the very least to be completely lacking tact or a filter.)

And then the situation escalates:

Sokka: Katara, she was my mother, too, but I think Aang might be right.

Katara: Then you didn't love her the way I did!

After 6 long years of Katara bottling in her dark feelings and letting them fester inside herself, she is finally letting them out and the first things she faces in a span of few minutes are outright rejection, invalidation of her feelings, comparison to a homicidal maniac and nothing akin to the unconditional support that she has provided to everybody. Her own brother tells her that he is siding with the boy who just compared her to a homicidal maniac.

Yes, accusing your own brother of not loving your mother enough is a very cruel thing to do. But both Sokka and Katara know that she doesn't entirely mean it.

But also, there is one very important factor in here:

In B3 Ep7 "The Runaway", Sokka says to Toph:

Sokka: I'm gonna tell you something crazy. I never told anyone this before, but honestly? I'm not sure I can remember what my mother looked like. It really seems like my whole life, Katara's been the one looking out for me. She's always been the one that's there. And now, when I try to remember my mom, Katara's is the only face I can picture. 

Katara overhears this conversation just as Sokka had meant her to.

This dialogue lets us know that Sokka's coping mechanism has made him suppress all memories of Kya and replace them with memories of Katara in order to attain a semblance of normalcy.

Both Katara and Sokka had very different ways of coping with Kya's death. Katara pressed down her feelings and tried her best to pretend to ignore them while Sokka partially succeeded in forgetting her.

When Katara first hears these words she is shown to be crying. But if she were to remember these very words while she was justifying herself infront of her own brother and a close friend for wanting to avenge her mother, it would've had a negative impact on her.

In her rage, she would've thought: "Of course he doesn't want to avenge mom. Because he doesn't think it's worth it and that's because he doesn't even remember enough of her to be mad about her death."

And for someone who has spent each day of the last 6 years trying to fill in the shoes of her mother and experiencing her absence everyday, the idea of forgetting her mother is a ridiculous concept to her.

Her thoughts would have quickly derailed to: "He didn't love her enough to remember her."

In light of these thoughts, saying "Then you didn't love her the way I did" doesn't feel out of the blue.

No, I am definitely not justifying what she said, I'm just laying out a possible explanation to why she said what she said.

Yes, she should've apologized to Sokka for this and I think that they definitely should've had a long conversation about their mother's death and how it affected them. Between Katara supressing her feelings and Sokka supressing his memories, i don't think they ever had this conversation.

But sadly we are given neither of these scenes.

Tl;dr: Everytime Katara mentions her mother, it's with good reason and I don't think it's fair to call a character toxic when they lack a mind to mouth filter for 5 minutes and say some mean things. And considering all that Katara has done for everybody, it isn't fair at all.

Peace out!