#...and where even personal hobbies involve the self-motivation and energy reserves necessary to engage w/ the things you like to create... | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

herrscherofmagic · 1 month ago

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y'know i was pretty confident that I didn't have depression, until i started learning (about 15 minutes ago) that apparently there's more flavors of depression than the usual Major Depressive Disorder.

so that's...

yeah.

okay.

sure.

:)))))))))

#i need to share some of these random thoughts with someone ASAP or I'll fucking explode so here y'all go lmao #apparently there's a few other disorders/conditions that align with MDD but aren't characterized by such brief and strong symptoms #one being Dysthymia/Persistent-Depressive-Disorder (PDD) and the other being Cyclothymia #i really need to sit down and just make a big giant chart and label all these different conditions and study their symptoms and treatments #then go to my therpaist and be like “hey wtf is all this??? can you help me figure out what tf is goin' on w/ me??”#then go to my psychiatrist and be like “hey so i did all this research and then ran things by my therapist so uhhh how do we fix me??”#I am not one to self-diagnose per se but I still think I need to make an effort to research this on my own first #i love both my therapist and my psychiatrist and they've been great help...#...but also i don't think they had the experience necessary to see past my autistic facade #because unfortunately I'm extremely good at pretending things are okay when they are absolutely not okay #and uhhh hit's kinda fucking killing me IRL and i'm not exaggerating when I say that #in a word where a person must expend their own mental energy to seek education and employment to gain financial capital to afford living...#...and where even personal hobbies involve the self-motivation and energy reserves necessary to engage w/ the things you like to create...#...then i kinda need to figure out the true underlying cause of the “low energy and bad at doing everything” situation I have going on #and fix that ASAP #okay thanks for coming to my ted talk comrades

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