#.fun fact: this song is why Andy is in charge of a casino

[thesinglesjukebox]

THE KILLERS - THE MAN [6.08] Officially better than "Somebody Told Me"...

Alex Clifton: I've loved seeing the Killers' evolution with every album; I appreciate their constant musical expansion, rather than cloning Hot Fuss four times (which, admittedly, I would've bought). "The Man" feels like a natural fit for the band: it's '80s Bowie and a funky bassline and Las Vegas glitz and thrillingly un-self-conscious. (I wouldn't buy "USDA certified lean" from any other band, but Brandon Flowers delivers that line with believable swagger.) Moreover, it's just plain fun and goofy. Yes, the chorus is a pile of cliches -- "I've got gas in the tank/I've got money in the bank" -- but the whole thing is so damn sweeping that I don't even care. After Battle Born, which was too serious for my liking, it's nice to hear the Killers take joy in their music. [9]

Alfred Soto: Still rueing the fact that God didn't make him gay, Flowers remembers Neil Tennant's career advice: "you got looks and some brains and you've made lots of money, plus you're a songwriter of modest talent and a singer with a mediocre parched voice fronting dudes with a cloppety idea of disco." I'm assuming Flowers has listened to Queen's "Body Language" a couple times, furiously licking himself as he sings this track's ridiculous hook over what he thinks is a sexy dance beat. It's about time a handsome male example of polyurethane design said fuck it and blew a kiss at his legion of gay fans. I mean, this is an actual couplet, folks: "You see what I mean?/USDA certified lean." That "The Man" isn't better is tied to Flowers' sense of shame. [5]

Austin Brown: What made the Killers so distinctive on Hot Fuss and Sam's Town was their distinctly chintzy, near-slacker take on glam: on "Mr. Brightside" and "When You Were Young," to name the obvious best of each, Brandon Flowers exploited his vocal limitations and took Strokes-style cosmopolitan cool supernova. By now, though, his ambitions (in vocal range and not much else) have gotten the best of him, manifesting on his solo albums in lovable Bowie pastiche, but here making him the histrionic weak link in an otherwise well-oiled synth-funk machine. [5]

Ryo Miyauchi: It's a wonder how it took so long for The Killers to merge with Arcade Fire. That chorus, though, sets them apart by a vast gap. Win Butler would never pull off such a thing with success. And really, who knew I wanted Brandon Flowers to sing, shamelessly, "I got news for you, baby: you're looking at the man"? [5]

Maxwell Cavaseno: You know, it feels absurd that someone as flamboyant as Brandon Flowers wouldn't do something along the lines of "campy disco-style track with The Darkness-type falsetto bits and meat jokes about himself and his body," so any initial shock and confusion goes away as soon as you register the first pun. However, this sounds something closer to Maroon 5 than I bet your average Killers fan would like to admit. There's a lot of clever ideas, but it ultimately falls as flat as the purposefully upchucked 'mahn' on the end of the chorus. [5]

Katie Gill: I like this because it sounds like Hot Fuss as interpreted by the Scissor Sisters but run through a layer of Duran Duran. And that sentence right there is why I've got a feeling a lot of more diehard Killers fans are going to HATE this song. [7]

Thomas Inskeep: They wanna be Duran Duran so bad, but unfortunately they're nailing being Duran Duran circa the late '90s, and that's not a good look. That wasn't even a good look for Duran Duran. [3]

Nortey Dowuona: This has great synthesizers and nothing else. [5]

Scott Mildenhall: When has Brandon Flowers ever been so invulnerably swaggering? There's a sense of power in something like "Andy, You're A Star", for instance, but it's bound in all kinds of tension. This time there's no doubt, anxiety, melancholy, regret or resignation, and it's so unusual that it seems entirely unserious. That conflict of being exceedingly lithe yet emotionally jagged holds such an appeal that losing the latter part feels very much like a loss. On the other hand, the music is lither than ever, and beyond the emotion the jaggedness is still up front. It is, too, a lot of fun; a lot of potentially participatory, performative fun. It just doesn't completely feel like these are the people to be performing it. [7]

Will Adams: I can't think of a worse fit for Brandon Flowers' limited voice than this piece of dick-swinging machismo, and yet there he goes, claiming to be the man with a plan while showing he's instead the man with the voice crack. [5]

Stephen Eisermann: The Killers come back swinging with disco-rock, oozing with proclamations of their success. Brandon Flowers sounds especially confident in his delivery. It's raunchy, muddy, and dirty, all while being extremely polished in the chorus. It's, frankly, a fucking blast. I just... yeah, I can't take it seriously. Flowers is one of the best male vocalists of our generation, by my ear, so it's hard to hear him singing songs this pedestrian, regardless of how fun. I'm praying this is some big joke about how those with the most white privilege often celebrate it as if it's some sort of huge accomplishment that they've succeeded, but I'm positive that's my mind spinning it so I can enjoy it without guilt. If I'm proven wrong, oh well. I'll just dance with my fellow oppressed to the music of our oppressors. [7]

Claire Biddles: Your flight touched down last Monday, but you still haven't gotten used to this heat. You can see it rise from the concrete like it does in films. You've finally managed to sneak out from the early morning shift Natalie hooked you up with at the motel and take a smoke, your first glimpse of the day's white-hot sun framed by high-rise blocks. You're about to crush the end of your spent cigarette to the ground when you see a car pull up. Everything's oversized in Vegas -- buildings and billboards standing on their tip toes to outsize each other -- but there's something about this mid-century car, and its Stetson-wearing driver, that feels even more towering than its surroundings. The driver gets out, takes off his hat and -- wait. You recognise that face. Something peripheral from ten, fifteen years ago? You were a teenager then, still living back East. What are the chances of someone from that shithole winding up here too? He walks towards you -- actually, who are you kidding; he walks towards the casino entrance that you're standing beside, you must seem invisible to someone as handsome as him, older than you and a little weathered around the temple, sure, but with a face like a kick to the gut. A face you've seen before. Then it hits you, and your body feels like it's shooting upwards and falling through the ground at the same time. It must have been 2004, your last year in high school. It was all over the local papers and some of the national ones too: 'Jealous Lover Kills Football Star's Sweetheart', 'Local Girl Slain In Gay Affair Scandal'. The girl -- Jenny something, you can't remember -- was in your English Literature class for two years, but you didn't speak. Blonde, beautiful, dated a guy on the football team. Andy something. There'd always been rumours about Andy and this other guy, but nothing concrete until he was taken in for questioning when Jenny's body was found washed up on the beach the next town over. He was never charged, but everyone thought he did it -- 'he's sure pretty but there's something about his smile that I don't trust' your mom once said over dinner, thumbing the 12 page report in the paper with the innocent accused splashed across the front page. And now he's in Vegas, with the same sly smile on his face but the rest all changed: his tan deep and his teeth done and his boots and hat just the right side of costume shop. He counts through a wad of hundreds flashily as he disappears inside. Nobody knows him here. Probably think he's some big shot. You wonder what will happen when they find out. [10]

Katherine St Asaph: First thought: "blowhard syndrome" in song form. But really, what the hell in the canon isn't? [6]

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