#AChoiceWasMade

[not-glorfindel-stop-asking]

Dude this account is embarassing 😭

Ah, yes, the classic “I don’t like this, so I must announce it” maneuver. A bold choice.

You had so many options before you:

Scrolling away. A timeless, effortless solution. The simplest path. The road most traveled.

Blocking me. Swift. Efficient. A guaranteed way to never be troubled by my existence again.

Reflecting upon why a fictional elf is living in your head rent-free. A more introspective approach, but no less valid.

Starting your own account to demonstrate how one should conduct themselves with dignity and grace. A noble undertaking, to be sure.

And yet… you chose violence.

You chose to pause, type this out, and send it, as if the universe itself had assigned you the divine task of informing me that my account does not meet your personal standards.

Oh also, are those tears I see? Is my dazzling intellect simply too much for your delicate sensibilities?

Have my words, woven with the finesse of a master bard, pierced too deeply?

Why are you crying? Is it because my sentences contain more syllables than your entire vocabulary? Because my wit dances circles around your attempt at an insult, leaving you breathless and bewildered? Is it the sheer radiance of my elven eloquence that blinds you, forcing you to weep as one gazes upon the Silmarils?

Or perhaps—just perhaps—you find yourself undone by the realization that you have entered into a battle of wits utterly unarmed? That, instead of striking me down with a devastating remark, you have only ensured that I now live in your mind, rent-free, draped luxuriously upon a chaise longue, sipping wine and composing even more extravagant responses?

I commend your commitment. Truly.

But my dear unfortunate critic, you do realize that I am an elf, yes? We are legendary for our ability to hold grudges. I am prepared to haunt your notifications with wit and unnecessary levels of eloquence for centuries.

In conclusion: You could have simply scrolled. But now you must live with the consequences.