#AWFULLY MEAN OF MY BRAIN TO GET BLOCKED WHEN I HAD 85% OF THIS DONE

[yeleltaan]

HEYSEL

Recommend romantic candidates for my muses and see their reaction! | accepting! | mentioned: @yellowfingcr

“Ah, Heysel... I’ve grown exceedingly fond of her, and it’d be silly of me try to deny it. Can you imagine it? If I went silent for a few, endless seconds, then responded ‘no’ out of nowhere? Straight out of a melodrama, proper pacing and satisfactory development sacrificed for a cheap twist, memorable and contentious. I assure you that’s not a role I intend to play, not with her."

It was at this moment that he pondered if she would have labelled herself as such. Perhaps ‘romantic’ was a word compelling enough, and sufficiently ample in its possible implications that she would have readily spoken it in playful tone, a boisterous jest that wouldn’t necessarily make the statement any less genuine. Whatever the case, Cayin saw it clearly enough in his dear scholar’s demeanor, a hesitance to acknowledge certain aspects of their relationship. Ultimately no consideration of semantics would erase the evident: their emotions were hopelessly entangled, and the affection which resulted from that, intimate and intense regardless of what name it was given, was one they were willing to convey in displays of vulnerable trust and bold ecstasy.

If anything, perhaps the word ‘candidate’ fell short by now. His gaze fell as he recalled waves of memories and sensations, bringing forth a soft smile he couldn’t contain.

“...She’s extraordinary. She makes me think things and in ways that are unfamiliar to me. It’s... strange, but also weirdly exciting. It feels fresh. As reticent as I once was, I find myself thinking back to our conversations, wondering when we’ll have the next, I even look forward to her... frankly bizarre sense of humor. And that almost menacing optimism she carries with her, and that, that wicked brilliance of hers she could rightfully boast about but rather keeps a deadly surprise for her prey. I could go on and on, and I haven’t even got started on what a sight she is to behold regardless of the shape she chooses to assume. So expressive and captivating.” Maddeningly absorbing, addictively sweet. Unpredictable, dangerous and spectacular, like loving a natural disaster. Strange, the odd allure that inspired in him.

“There is so much I’d like to know of her still, and she must think the same. I think that we’re both simply... wary. A little scared, maybe. Yharnam isn’t keen on remaining one way or the other, it didn’t come to be what it is by staying still and, well, neither did we. It’s not that we don’t want to walk the way together, we just don’t know if or when our paths may split. And Heysel... she isn’t someone you can move away from hers, not against whatever will her ambition motivates. She simply wouldn’t be Heysel otherwise.”

But that was only one side of the coin. The other, which he chose not to elaborate on, posed a mirror problem: Cayin had an immutable path of his own without which he wouldn’t be Cayin. And even if their tracks remained parallel and never crossed or split the question remained, what would she think of ‘the gentleman’, as she liked to call him, when his character ceased to reflect that title? The two of them were perceptive enough to know, there was more to the other than even what they had revealed to each other already. No matter how unconventional or unrepenting, kinship of mind was not guaranteed.

“I would merely want her to walk by my side, without renouncing who she is. That is all I could ever ask.”