#AWWW. she sounds happy to hear from him and wants to go say hello................... growth from her voicelines omg

[aromanticasterisms]

this whole epilogue is just a little treat for me oh my god. "familiar faces arrive in simulanka" does not even begin to cover it

[polygamyff]

58. Part 8

Here I am once again, part fucking two of a pregnancy that I am again alone with, but it is what it is and I just want my medication, technically my doctor is in New York but my old doctor here was nice enough to accept me to come get the medication here, so nice of him. I have been noticing how fucking pale I am, since I took my makeup off I look terrible, so I had to put some shades on because this is not it and I look a mess. I am sad, I am not even going to front and act like I am ok because I am not, I am so tired. What a dreadful fucking day for me, my ears perked up hearing the name Davenport and looked at the TV “it was a big night for Maurice Davenport, the son of Marquis Davenport which owned Davenport hotels. His son has been successful in bringing back the hotels but his father has now passed this on to Maurice, there was big words from him on the night, he has openly declared that Hilton is now under Davenport hotel internationally which is a big blow for the Hilton company itself, this is the last of the them. On the night, he arrived with his daughter and fiancé which on the day spoken on how he was humbled by them. We did get to speak to him for a short while before he had to go, this is what he had to say” the presenter said, I want the seat to swallow me up as my face is on there “oh god” I breathed out, I look horrible and I am getting stared at in this waiting room “Robyn Willis” oh just on time, I needed this “thank you” getting up ever so quickly, I am getting gawked at like a crazy bitch but I am being exposed to the world now. Rushing in behind the nurse “we thought we lost you to New York” she said “you did, but I am back. I wish I could be here forever, and it’s for the usual thing too” I chuckled “we miss you though, the times you fainted. We are glad you came early this time anyways” she got a point, I always arrive when I am ready to faint and then wake up thinking what happened “you looked so beautiful there, sorry I just noticed” I groaned out “I keep getting stared at now, I guess it’s started” clearly it has, I want to be a nobody again.

The door opened “Robyn! Long time, welcome back” my doctor said, “you missed me?” I laughed saying “of course, you called through and I always said I would be here for you” my doctor sat down on his seat “I do appreciate it, I am here for a few more days longer, I don’t think I will be able to last. I am pregnant again so it makes it worse for me, trying to keep another human alive as well as myself” I have to add the I am pregnant, I don’t want them to give me something that can harm the baby now “awww congratulations, I am happy for you. How far along are you?” I froze staring at him “erm, well I don’t know that maybe eight weeks. I have not had a scan, things have been hectic for me” he smiled at me “overnight celebrity, I was telling my wife. I have picked her from the floor of the doctors office many of times, my wife thinks I am crazy so. Let’s check on the little one first” I knew that would happen “do you have too?” I asked “it’s my job too, come on now Robyn. Let’s see if it is ok, at least then we can get you the medication. It’s not a bad thing, we just want to make sure” I just feel like shit now, I guess I will I have my first scan alone “just that my partners is not here and it’s like I don’t want to be alone again in this?” I admitted “how about we just check, and I can keep the information if all good news to myself?” nodding my head “see, not all bad. Come on” it is still bad to me.

This feels so weird, it is weird because I didn’t think I would be in this position without Maurice. I did say this would be different, I am just stressed and fed up now “would you like to see the foetus at least?” he asked, now I am like deep down I want too “you know what” I sighed out, I would like to see. Just print out the scan photo” I already hate being on here, I don’t feel too good either and I am doing this without Maurice, this is killing me inside “just going to have a look, I won’t mention anything. So what did you say, how many weeks would you say?” I blew out air heavily just thinking “I would say about eight weeks, that sounds about right. So much going on I am just not with it, sorry but eight weeks sounds perfect” I am useless right now “that is fine, just going to make some notes” hearing my phone starting to ring “ignore that” I said, only god knows who that is because it can’t be him, he is going to be sleeping for a while. Being on this table right now is making me nervous “sorry, I didn’t drink much water either, must be hard” I can feel he is struggling “just a little, I am just taking some measurements and” he drifted off “this looks to me six weeks and six days” lifting my head up staring at my doctor “no, that is wrong. I know it can’t be six weeks. Maybe when I found out yes but no, is that bad? So, my baby is small? What is this?” I have so many questions, this is not good, and I am panicking “please don’t get upset, in your particular case, the embryo’s little heart is beating but the dates are not matching up with what you had in mind. A follow-up scan is definitely necessary to assess for growth. There is a 97% chance of a normal outcome of your pregnancy, don’t worry, just you need to have a follow up scan in two weeks. Your baby is ok, it’s fine. Just the length” that has really upset me though “don’t cry please” resting my head back “I don’t understand, how has that happened? Is there something wrong” I sniffled, my doctor held my hand “not at all, it will be fine. You need to have another scan in a week or two for a definitive answer, it can be you haven’t processed the day you actually fell pregnant, but I can’t say now. It can be how the baby is laying too, please don’t worry. It’s very healthy” the nurse placed a polaroid in my view “it’s very healthy, no need to worry” I smiled a little seeing my scan picture, taking it from her “so tiny” it’s really tiny though “tiny but healthy, just need to concentrate on you ok? You need to relax and let the baby relax. Running around doesn’t help at all” my doctor is right, maybe my baby is not growing because it can’t relax because I am not relaxed, whatever it is I pray it’s ok because I am so sad.

Closing my car door sighing out, that was awful then, but I have my medication. Let me check my phone and see who was trying to contact me, I am hurt that my baby is small I mean what does that even mean. Did I get the dates wrong, I just pray my baby is ok. My mother was ringing me, I bet Reign is playing up or something. She even video called me so let me do it back, waiting for the video call to connect. I thank god for these shades because I am a mess right now “Reign, mommy is on the phone. Hey Robbie, Reign wanted you so I just thought I would see what you are doing” I cooed out “my little baby, what is she doing?” my mom on video call is a nightmare, it’s like she doesn’t how to hold her phone. It warms my heart hearing Reign shout mama; I was jealous when she said dada first but hearing her say mama warms my heart “my pretty baby, yes look beautiful” poking my lower lip out seeing my daughter’ hair bouncing everywhere as she ran “Reign, hello baby” my mom crouched down “you wanted mommy, here she is say hi” she doesn’t want me, she probably wanted something, my daughter has the biggest smile on her face “aye, don’t be showing out now pulling that face to me” Reign bought her face to the phone “awww Reign, you miss me? Giving mommy kisses now? I love you baby” she looks so proud of herself and then walked off “is that it? You wanted to give mommy a kiss?” I couldn’t help it, I just ended up crying like I didn’t want too but I did “she has gone back to playing, oh what? Robbie, baby don’t cry” taking my shades off “I didn’t want too, I am so angry with myself. It’s just a lot mom. I am coming back; I will talk to you then” I just don’t want to say it on facetime.

I have been driving with my vision blurred the whole way back, I just couldn’t stop myself crying so I parked up outside my mother’ home and gathered myself up, now I can go inside. I hope Reign is awake still so I can hug her, I need a hug from Reign right now. Walking up the steps to the home, opening the door “I am home, where is Reign-Texas?” I said aloud so she can hear me “oh wow Reign, mommy is home. Come on” hearing my mom say, I guess she is playing up with no nap. Closing the door behind me “come on, show mommy what you got” placing my bag on the couch, I want to see her. I gasped seeing Reign “oh wow baby, you look so pretty” she has shades on “she walking around like Stevie Wonder, she can barely walk” crouching down to her “come here, you look so pretty in these Reign. Aww you like them” catching Reign before she walked into the couch “mommy likes them, can she see your eyes now” Reign moved them back from her face “boo” hugging Reign “mommy missed you” kissing the top of her head “you have been crying Robbie, did he call you?” looking up at my mother “can I never hide anything from you and no he hasn’t. I have his phone; I don’t think he knows my number off by heart. I would be shocked if he could know that” moving my head back, Reign is trying to put the shades on me but she whined out “ok, I put them on” taking them from her “mhmmm, I am not happy. I don’t care what you say, it is upsetting my soul this. I am imbalanced spiritually now because I just want to see her, mother to mother and knock her down. Just one hit Robyn, she has disturbed me. The whole family did or does. I am just livid” Reign clapped her hands “mommy look nice” these are too damn tight, these baby ass shades “Reign put it on, let me mommy do it” taking them off “did you buy these?” I am sure I didn’t “I did” placing them over her eyes, Reign cheesed at me “she is crazy, look at gran” I pointed, she is cheesing so hard.

I think Reign knows I need lots of hugs and love right now, but I am glad she is having a nap, she just wanted me to do it “how was the scan? You have been crying and I want to know why, I am not questioning myself, we have a situation and I don’t care. I am involved. You are the only person I have, and I will fight for you” my mother said, pointing at my bag “the scan picture is in there, such a tiny thing. So, he made me do it, just to check on if the baby is ok. I said I should be around eight weeks I would say. He turned around and goes it looks like six weeks and six days to me, I am like it can’t be. There are weeks missing, so I am confused. He goes it’s small, he can’t really say anything, but I need a follow up scan to determine if it grows. He said it’s healthy but smaller than what I am saying. So, it upset me, of course it would. I thought this would be different but yet I am alone, what is the difference, so I just cried” my mom poked her lips out “it’s a tiny little thing isn’t it, but it’s healthy. I am sure it’s ok, you may have got the dates wrong, you both have sex constantly and whatever. I don’t know, I don’t think you should worry. Really don’t, I am so happy you are pregnant again. Like incredibly happy, I have so much love to give. Reign takes up a lot of it, but I have more, she is such a diva. Reign is so confident, and she is barely one” I smiled lightly “her personality shines, I love it so much” my phone started to ring in my hand, looking at the caller ID “Marquis” if he is looking for Maurice he can go and beat his ass, I will give him the hotel room “hello” answering the call “Robyn I’m sorry” I breathed out, it’s Maurice “I don’t know what the fuck happened, I really don’t I barely drank. You think I was drinking a lot, but I didn’t. Where are you?” he explained “I left you a note to read” I said, my mother is waving her arms around “his mother” she whispered “I want details” my mom said “give him the address, I want to meet her” I am getting side tracked “my head is fucked up, I don’t know where my phone is. Nalah shut up! Fucking swear to god, shut up!” Maurice shouted in my ear “I am just hearing stories, where are you?” looking at my mom “where is your mother?” I said, my mom nodded my head at me “here actually” I laughed “stories huh, what stories?” I bet she is telling stories “don’t want to hear it, but I will come to you. How about you gather your family, actually. Get Lionel there, I would like him there. Your mother needs to be there. We need to discuss stories, do we not? I am sure she is sat there telling you that I have done bad, and you’re sat there not saying a word” I know that bitch “my dad slapped my mother if that is what you asking, I just don’t know what happened. Come to the hotel, I will wait. Can you bring me some clothes too?” disconnecting the call.

My mom is waiting for me to speak “he said that Marquis slapped Joy, but he didn’t say much. He is claiming that he didn’t drink that much to be like that. He’s sorry. He wants me to come to the hotel. I would like to get my dad’ family to run with me but then I am just creating some drama not needed, I want them to know I am not alone. It’s not just me and my mother, they are bullies. But Joy will be there” my mom is laughing “I hope she is ready for my slap too; you know what Robyn. It’s things like that, Maurice is not a bad boy. I like him, he has a nice heart, but the family do see you as alone, no father here and it’s just me, poor you. But really you have such a big family, the Hispanics will do anything for you and I know that, I mean I guess I do know that but with the way they fucked with my baby, I would say yes but it will end up even more of a mess because Maurice is a very decent boy, he is stupid but he does love you and treats me with the utmost respect. I wouldn’t want that for him or Marquis, but I will be having some lengthy fucking words, oh yes I am. This can’t happen, this is so important for you. You are sensitive with being pregnant too. My one baby, this shit won’t happen on my watch” my mom is ready for a battle, I just don’t want her to take it out on Maurice because that is my job “you deal with Maurice, but I am dealing with that stupid family. I will tell him I am not happy though” my mom added, like she could read my mind but she probably could with how connected we are.