#Addy was just going to become a mindflayer in the end anyways and lose his mind regardless.

[parasite-core]

I have more to say about how I feel about the ending of BG3 after beating it as both an evil Bhaalspawn and a redeemed hero. End game spoilers under the cut.

I don’t like what I feel like the game is saying about the ultimate reward for being a good person, at least from my perspective after playing through twice. In my evil game Calio had virtually no allies, he’d caused the deaths of almost all his companions and the ones he still had were either on their own paths to being villains or miserable. Then he took control of the Netherbrain, betrayed the last few people who actually trusted him and handed the world to Bhaal on a silver platter. The final scene is him on a throne of bone surrounded by his mind-controlled ‘friends’ while he uses godlike power to wipe out some attacking Githyanki. He gets everything he wanted, essentially. Power and no one being able to stop him as he razes the universe to the ground in his god’s name. He is happy in his absolutely twisted way as the world burns.

Then we have Adramelek, who fought against the monster within himself and won. He denied Bhaal and was given a second chance at life as his own person. He helped all of his friends to become their best selves. He fought tooth and nail to save not just this city or this world but even the Githyanki and anyone else he came across who he could lend help to.

And what does he get in the end? He has no choice but to sacrifice himself and turn into a mindflayer, otherwise he’d have to damn the Githyanki to their slavery at Vlaakith’s hands by either letting the Emperor kill Orpheus or by letting Orpheus make the ultimate sacrifice for his people and become a mindflayer himself. Addy couldn’t betray Lae’Zel’s trust like that, not after he’d spent so long promising her that he would help to save her people.

So in the end the city is saved, everyone is celebrating, it’s a beautiful happy moment. All of Addy’s friends survived. Karlach and Wyll have a lead for fix for her heart. Lae’Zel is fighting a revolution alongside Orpheus, and has learned and grown so much at Addy’s side that she can even be Orpheus’ diplomat. Shadowheart is traveling and finding herself for the first time in her life. Gale is teaching students the ways of the Weave and is finally free from the mistakes of his past. And while Astarion had to return to the shadows, he’s learned to accept himself as he is, and is actually genuinely happy despite his lot in life. The world at large is so much better than it was before Addy touched it.

And yet Adramelek is a mindflayer, losing what is left of himself, seeing his once beloved friends as ‘valuable assets’, having to fight against himself to not try to eat their brains. Astarion doesn’t know how much of the man he loved is even in there anymore, and they parted ways, deciding to just be friends while they figured out this new situation. So Addy lost the most loving and dear relationship to him he had, and he doesn’t even remember how to properly feel sad about it.

The world is happy, at peace, and on its way to healing. But the one who saved it is damned.

So what do these two stories tell us? That doing the right thing will destroy you and make you miserable even as those around you are lifted up, and that being a terrible person will get you everything you want so long as you don’t mind destroying everything and everyone around you? That’s so fucking cynical. I hate it. It leaves such a sour taste in my mouth.