#AintNoGloryInTheWest

[survivorsunsetrodeo]

Finale | Beauty and the Weeb - Josh

Today has been weird. I woke up with Tay mad at me, Emma got Kimmi’d and now Tay and I are stuck working together? What are we The Beauty and The Weeb? Jacob is in the best position this round and I need to be on the same page as him. I can tell Ari is defending Dan for some reason because they wouldn’t vote Dan. 

BIG SIGH

I have never ever in my life been so sad after a challenge. Like damn, these people really hate me huh. Like Josh, fuck you dude. What have you done in this game besides be Nic’s puppet and then be Emma’s puppet. Goodbye! Jacob!!! Ari and Taylor’s medallions were literally RIGHT THERE to smash and you did what? Smash mine? Ugly.

I am like 99% sure that I’m getting voted out tomorrow night because of my association with Ari. Which kinda sucks, but it is what it is.

Taylor is trying to tell me she thinks she can flip Josh on Jacob, but honestly idk about all that. Part of me wants to tell Jacob that she’s coming for him, but also, idk if I can trust any of them. Taylor also has been saying that if I’m down to target Ari at f4, then she could use her idol on me and then we can take on Ari together at f4. Idk if she just like drank the stupid juice or not, but that works for me? But will I be targeting Ari at f4 if they don’t win immunity? Idk about that. Hopefully I have immunity and we can get Taylor’s ass out of here at 4. The other option is that I go with the idol play plan, then let Ari know last minute so they can’t do anything stupid, and then vote Taylor out with Ari.

I have more options than I think, but I just don’t have the mental capacity to think them all through just now. 

I can't believe I've been playing this game for over a month. I'm so exhausted maintaining different relationships especially now when there's only 5 of us. I can't be caught playing both sides at this pivotal round. If I had it my way I would vote out Dan rather than Jacob but I can't even do that because Ari and Taylor refuses to vote out Dan. Here's how I think the vote will fall

Ari - Jacob Dan - Jacob Jacob - Dan (Possibly Taylor but I'm not counting on it) Taylor - Jacob

There is no way Jacob stays unless I can somehow convince Ari or Taylor to switch their votes. What the heck happened this round that made Taylor wanna work with Dan? Do they have a Final 2? Dan did give his money to Taylor the round Ali went. Dan is just the player that just won't go AWAY. I made a final 2 pact with him just so he doesn't vote me out this round but I don't intend to go to the final 2 with him. I don't intend to be in a final 2 with anyone here at all! The only scenario I can see myself having a chance to win is if I am at the Final 2 with Jacob because every single player here is going to win over me and it sucks.

I hate that I feel like every round is about me. Like that’s cute bc I love the attention, but also like come on y’all.

Obviously I’m worried it’s gonna be me tonight some how but I really don’t know what else I can do other than follow my gut with this vote.

I’m seeing where Taylor is at rn and acting like I’m worried that Ari and Jacob might vote me this round. If I’m able to convince her to idol me I’m obviously gonna get Jacob and Ari to vote her out. But we’ll have to see how that convo goes. She isn’t answering me which is concerning.

I’m not convinced that Josh will vote for Jacob and is going to vote for me because I think I scare him? I’m not really sure what the beef is there. Apparently he told Ari that he fears that Tay and I have a f2. Which I guess is sorta true but I also don’t wanna go to the end with her at all.

I’m hoping for an easy vote that either sends Josh or Jacob home tonight. That’s all I want universe. Help a boy out. 

im going 2 be sick. im getting 5th but like.........its ok i guess <3

i have to win this for jacob.

there is no other option.

The way I voted Josh and Jacob still went home bc of Ari!!! Omfgggg. I’m dying honestly. Thank god for this blinding light twist bc I didn’t get EXPOSED.

And I fucking won the immunity challenge. Who said a gay can’t spell? XOXO!

Honestly getting to final 3 is just so gratifying. I really would love to win the final immunity too to kind of show I have some challenge ability haha. My plan is to study the season because in the past I’ve seen the final challenge be season trivia so I really need to go back through and study shit. I feel like I have a reasonable shot at winning against most people but I know I’m gonna get TORN UP by Nick. I’m afraid to go to the end with Taylor and Ari because of their game, but I’m also afraid to go to the end with Josh because of his social connections. This is gonna be a tough tough decision and regardless of what happens I’m gonna piss someone off.

Going with Taylor seems like an okay move because I know I’d at least have Ari’s vote but I think it’s a toss up for the rest of the votes. Ari has been talked up as THE THREAT all game and honestly I see it, but they’ve also not played as flashy as I have. I have a lot more survivor-esque aspects to my game in my opinion. Like me literally attending every tribal council except for one, and being vulnerable at most of the tribal councils. I think a jury will like that I had to do what I had to do to survive. Then with Josh, I just don’t think I have a chance at many of the jury votes (Jabari, Nic, Emma) specifically, but I might pick up Jacob, Ari, Ali, and Brandi. With Taylor deciding if she wants to be bitter and tie it haha.

I mean my point here is that I’ve set myself up to have options. I know I probably won’t be player of the season but dammit I feel like I’ve played such a strong game.

It’s moments before f4 tribal council and I’m at peace with my decision.

I recognize the power that is Ari. I recognize that they may beat me. But I also recognize that I’ve made a friend for life. And that’s way more important to me these days. And if that’s an accolade to their social game, so be it.

I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again. I would literally die for Ari. 

AND NOW I GOT A LEGACY ADVANTAGE?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! h*ck

it better be an add-a-premerge-juror because i don't wanna be MEAN

This was a good ending chapter for my ORG career. I came into this game with no expectation. I took this game phase by phase. Preswap, swap, merge, end game. I knew I wanted to play differently than I have before. More loyal and less shady. I think there were moments when I was definitely tempted by people to revert to my old ways, but temptation doesn’t always mean you follow through.

I feel my game showed restraint. I stuck with Ari because I always knew they had my best interest in mind. Did I know every detail of their game? Nope. Did I need to? Nope. I still got here. I used information I had wisely. I knew when to call it quits with a plan and hang back. I never wanted to be the reason the vote switched to me.

That’s not to say I didn’t have many close calls, because I definitely did. But I survived. I went to all but one tribal council, and I survived. My social game got me here when I got swap fucked. I fucking did that.

Regardless of what the jury thinks of me, I know that I played a game worth making FTC. Is it a winning game? That’s not for me to decide officially. But, to me I’ve won. I’ve won in ways that go past having my name in a winners circle. I’ve learned so much about myself through this game and through my friendships with others. And that’s okay with me. I look forward to answering the questions about my game, but there is one thing I will not stand for and that’s being made to feel badly for the decisions I made.

At the end of the day those decisions were mine and I stand by them 100%.

This may not have been my first rodeo, but in a way I’m happy it will likely be my last.

Much love ORGs. You’ve given me a lot ✨😌

Needless to say, that was rough. Rougher than I expected tbh.

I probably should have fought more, but I fought so hard in this game that I was so beaten up by the end.

To say I’m proud of my game is an understatement. I played so well in my opinion and frankly I wouldn’t change a thing. To finish my org career with a second place finish, makes me so proud. From a 17 year old kid with an attitude problem, to a 26 year old kid with a slightly smaller attitude problem, I can thank ORGs for a lot of my growing up.

They’ve taught me to value my strengths and work on my weaknesses. I owe a lot to these silly games.

To be proud is to be fulfilled. And I am fulfilled. Time to check into my room at the retirement home ❤️

that final tribal council was ROUGH........ i think i did okay but i'm stressed over all the things i forgot to mention, definitely said "social" too many times, didn't get to talk about all the specific strategic choices i made...... i feel confident of 3 votes (jacob, taylor, ali) and that's it i seriously don't know what's gonna happen but either way i'm very proud of myself and i'm proud of dan and it has been an honor to be in this rodeo <3 so long and thanks for all the scorpions

[survivorsunsetrodeo]

Ep 12 | Leave Me For Dead - Dan

The way I didn’t yee my last haw

https://prnt.sc/xt4mn2 the way this actually ended up happening

so to recap: taylor has decided for some reason that she will no longer speak to me, my rodeo bf has disappeared off to the woods indefinitely without leaving me any sort of gameplan OR that idol he has, and josh/emma take 12 hours to reply to anything i send.

the only bright spot today has been dan... bless dan disbrow for always making me feel better and being funny and kind. really truly appreciate him so much.

Sometimes I forget that people can lie.....and that I can lie too.

my thought process last round in voting Ali was Ali was NOT someone i couldn't work with in the future but keeping Dan here's a problem too because I wasn't sure how close Dan and Ari are. Tay's immune this round because she has the shotgun so no votes are going to her regardless. When I told Dan that I know about Tay's shotgun he went silent so I just KNOW he's gonna be out for me this round. I really need Emma and Jacob this round to stay here but if Jacob's not around I'm gonna have to talk to Tay but I don't want to. Ari and Tay are not on speaking terms as of now it seems so I don't see Ari, Tay and Dan working together BUT they might vote together this round through Dan which is a PROBLEM. I don't think Ari will vote me so I told them in advance if the vote is leaning towards me to please redirect it to Emma. Wait could that actually work though?

Emma and Jacob vote Dan Me and Ari vote Emma Dan and Tay vote me..

HOW THE HECK WOULD THAT TURN OUT? Dan, me and Emma tie and Ari, Jacob and Dan votes...actually never mind I dont like those odds.

In summary, I DONT FUCKIN KNOW WHAT TO DO NEXT. I KNOW I ASKED THE RNGODS TO GIVE TAY THE HIDEEN IMMUNITY IDOL THIS ROUND BUT NOT LIKE THIS

Well last round was a fucking doozy. I literally almost went home because of Taylor.

So I guess Taylor called Ari and told them that she had spoken to Josh and said that Ari was the most concerned about Taylor flipping (aka the exact words Ari had said to me privately on call). So that sparked Ari figuring out something was up and that I was likely going against them.

So I was seemingly dead in the water. Like do not resuscitate. Leave me for dead.

But then I got to thinking. Ari doesn’t necessarily NEED to go at f7. Yes they’re a big threat but let’s not put the cart before the horse. As long as I’m not seated next to Ari at the FTC they can get on out of here after all the idol nonsense is gone. So I went to Ari and told them that they needed to know that Ali and Taylor had launched a full blown attack against them and had filled my mind with negative thoughts bc they were exposing info that Ari hadn’t told me about their game (them having so many alliances, them having idols etc)

And this PISSED Ari off. And prompted the “would you vote Ali” message that changed my whole position in the game. I really put in that work and it paid off. 

So now for THIS round, Ari exposed that Jacob has the whiskey and is playing it on himself so I came up with the plan to tell Emma and josh that the vote was between Jacob and Taylor (who are gonna idol themselves but they don’t have to know that) so me Ari and Jacob can vote out Emma hehe 

Power Rankings ONE - TAYLOR (+1) Threat: 9 (+2) I finally have my game back under control. I’ve completely taken this round into my own hands. Despite Josh and Dan having a tiff last round, I’ve gotten them to mend their difference in order to obtain a common goal of either taking out Ari, or taking out Ari’s right hand man. It would be stupid of any of us to go to f4 with Ari and Jacob and they are a voting block of 2. I would say what im best at is creating logical solution and painting the big picture in people’s minds and I’ve done that successfully this round. I’m back in it, and only one person stands in my way. TWO - JOSH (+1) Threat: 7 (NC) Trust: 7 (NC) Josh is second because he really does hold the power in determining who goes here. He’s been approached with both plans, but I do believe ive convinced him that Jacob going makes the most sense for all of us and I believe that he believes it. I’m starting to look at josh as a jury threat as well, which I believe will be my pitch to dan. He’s got a couple of locked votes id say, Nic, Emma, maybe even Jabari. 3 on a jury of 7 is an insaneeee amount. THREE - DAN (+2) Threat: 6 (+2) Trust: 7 (NC) Dan lands here because he’s the third to make this plan work. Jacob was pitching to josh to vote for dan, so he kind of needed to just have blind faith the josh wouldn’t flip. I see dan as less fo a threat than I do josh because Dan’s game has really been reliant on other people controlling his faith in the game, rather than him having a grasp on it. Aside from the round Nic went, dans been in the back seat just hoping he doesn’t fall out. FOUR - ARI (NC) Threat: 8 (NC) Trust: 1 (NC) Although Ari has immunity this round, they really didn’t do a good job at figuring out where the votes were going. For example, the past two rounds ive had active idols, let the tribe know, and yet hadn’t heard from Ari each round. Missed opportunity of their part, and they’re losing their right hand man this round because of it. FIVE - JACOB (-4) Threat: 4 (-2) Trust: 1 (-1) I think it’s no surprise to anyone that Jacob lands at the bottom of the power rankings. After a terrible round last round, he really didn’t do any damage control on what had happened. He now has dan mad at him, Ari doesn’t have control over dan, josh and I. There’s really not much more to add. If Ari hadn’t of won immunity Jacob would have skated by another round, but fell short because of it.

[survivorsunsetrodeo]

Ep 11 | No Regrets. No Mercy. It's Happening. - Ari

Y'all.... the way I just.... asked Emma if she had an idol flaksjlakjfakls

She said no at first, but now she's saying yes lmao. OMG. I literally don't know what to do with this information other than like sit on it? Emma seems to be okay with me knowing this and as much as I want to tell Ari..... god idk this is so big.

This could really shake up the game for me and split up some of the big people in my alliance lkfjalkfja. GOD. Why did I even ask. Well knowledge is power and she wouldn't just like tell me if she didn't trust me???

I know I can't beat Ari and I think against Taylor it would be super close, but I also love them so much, so I would feel so bad if one of them went home bc of me lfkjalkfja. Like what is even happening rn!!! I just. Can't breathe. 

YALL. I just. CANNOT.

Taylor calls me right. And says oh btw Jacob, Ari, and Ali pooled money at swap in order to get the REVOLVER. Which they neglected to tell me. Which is so cute. But THEN! She also tells me that Ali wants to go for Ari this round flshjsjshaa which is kinda hot and I’m BITTER AF because I literally fucking spilled my entire anxious heart to Ari and felt like they were my number 1 and NOW they’ve been hiding shit from me??? Goodbye. So then I tell Taylor about Emma having the beer and now we know where both idols are this round so woo!

So then Ali starts to call me to tell me goodnight and that he loves me (he’s such a sweetie) and I was like Ali what’s the tea? And he just SPILLS everything to me about all the alliances he’s in with Ari and how he knows we don’t stand a chance against Ari at final tribal council. WHICH IS ALL FACTUAL. And definitely things I’ve been thinking about, but also haven’t had the guts to say anything about. So basically a plan was hatched in order to get the 3-2-2 vote to still happen but have it land on ARI with the idol in their pocket this round. I am literally going to go ALL OUT for the next immunity comp bc Ari cannot win.

Sorry Ari, this town ain’t big enough for the both of us. 

got my third idol probably gonna waste it thanks nic hehe <3 Its funny that i was on the very bottom of the tribe now that these people found out i have the idol they want to be my bestie and vote with me i am gonna try very hard to win this immunity so i could only maybe play the immunity idol on josh or he can play it on himself ASDFGH also f2 with 8 people jury just say that redemption island is happening i guess my game plan i hope is to get out ari (pain) then maybe flip and get out maybe dan/jacob i have a feeling after this vote that dan/jacob are probably gonna flip get one of me or josh out probs josh but i dont want that to happen so i am gonna try to make sure i keep on trying to build my relationship with taylor more like i did last tribal also noted wow my biggest weakness in orgs is not my emotions its honestly my self confidence damn also talk to ali more my goat brother <3 also i really miss brandi she was really nice also i feel bad but not super bad that jabari was out i wanted to work with them last vote but they were throwing me utb that wasnt good.. Idk maybe if i hella play these last few rounds then make a very convincing case maybe i do have a small chance of winning idk fuck touchy subjects AHHH it shouldnt effect me now but tribal made me remember again ASDFG even tho theres people who havent made moves like me.

https://prnt.sc/xo035n

The way I was complaining weeks ago that I was gonna go 16th place...I have to laugh. Me and Emma seems to be in a power position this round since the majority alliance is probably starting to turn against each other according to Ari which is great because I'll have options. Last round I told Emma to distance ourselves and search for cracks within the majority alliance. That led to Ari creating The Clementines alliance with me, Ari and Taylor. Now I'm on board on this group but Tay's been doubting keeping me over Jabari as soon as they found out Emma bought another idol. I'm lying to everyone that I didnt give Emma money (which I did) and told them Nic gave Emma money before he left (which was true but it wasn't enough to buy a $500 idol). Emma got close with Dan and Jacob (separately?) but after all the disassociation with Emma people still think we're working together because they keep bringing our names in private conversations. Emma thinks it's Ari & Tay vs Dan & Jacob but Ari tells me that they are willing to vote with me and Emma this round (with Jacob? idk) but I'm not really sure what the dynamics is on their side but Ari wants to go after Tay and Dan which I'm totally on board with the idea. I would rather have Dan go first because I think the Ari and Tay thing can still be useful and Dan has more pre-existing relationships than Tay I think. The best case scenario is for me to win Immunity and with Emma having the tier 2 idol the majority alliance is forced to turn against each other prematurely. Signs have already been forming when Jacob and I called a few days ago about "Taking out the threats". If I can pull off pretending to have an idol too that'd be great because it appears that NO ONE knows where the t3 idol is which is weird. One more thing is that someone noticed about the finale being a F2 with 8 Jury Members. That really doesn't sound right and people seemingly getting money out of nowhere it's possible that some sort of Edge of Extinction or Redemption Island could be at play here. I wonder how far it goes....Premergers feel like they've been gone for far too long to have an impact in the game but hey I could be wrong.

lolz i need to win immunity or josh idk josh is probably good at math i hate math but im gonna keep on trying hehe also if i see something in the saloon brought i know alis ass brought the idol im just gonna keep on trying to remind ali like hey bro if u want a chance of winning dont vote me off aha 

trust list you probably know 1: Josh > everyone else i need more ideas to make confessionals i am kinda tired at this point but dont give up until its over but honestly my tiredness is probably why i am in the retirement home also not me winning like 75 dollars when i almost wanted to abstain because this challenge is always a nightmare this challenge is more fun the emoji math maze... i think ali probs has the idol if he has 135 left when i told him if not if i see something in the saloon brought ill assume ali brought a tier 2 idol i know this tribal is gonna be crazy so i am gonna mentally prepare for it i also told dan i have the idol which is an L but everyone knows that i have it because why would they say they want to work with me when they hella lied to me during the nic vote  also its the fact they seem me hey best person to take to f2 next to ali thank god for this idol honestly i guess another thing im worried about i need to distance myself from josh but thats impossible because i know jacob was straight up with me and told me he wanted to work with me and josh also dan also was kinda like that as long as i can get myself safe this vote ill be fine but like i said in my other confessional  i know dan is probably gonna flip next round maybe i am thinking about targetting them if ari wins immunity o.o also i belong in a retirement hope random thing live finales make me wanna kms because what if i cry live thats so sad and my biggest fear im kinda okay at talking at finales.

so  u can score like 100m in this challenge good bye brb gonna try to get the most points..

ok here's the status report before i go off to bed:

dan is almost definitely tryin some funny business so he has got to go. i'm working with josh and emma on this one and i truly believe they are genuine, and jacob is obvs with that so it'd be four votes dan, three votes whatever the heck happens with the adoption centre split-vote plan. i don't think i even need to play my idol however im debating whether i should do so anyway because taylor is very much on the don't-break-ranks-just-trust bandwagon and i feel like she is going to be angery if i break that to go after dan without it looking like i felt very in danger? i dunno tbh. i could just pin it all on jacob and pretend to be shockedt but that feels a bit dirty and i'd like to own my moves thank u very much.... guess i'll play it out tomorrow and see how i feel

Not me waking up at 3am to a message from Taylor saying that Ari is feeling sketched out by me because I’m being calm.

Oh yeah Ari? Do you want me to act paranoid? I can do that, but maybe I’m not paranoid bc I know where both idols are this round. It just makes me think that Ari likes that I get paranoid and freaked out.

Part of me actually wants to tell them everything about the plan to get them out but at the same time I feel like that will get me voted out. I feel like the mind games are becoming a little too much for me and I don’t even really feel like playing anymore.

lol of course the person i wanted the least to win immunity wins immunity. Things are definitely starting to get spicy and i might've pushed it a little farther when i lied and said Dan is coming after Ari and I mean he might be but it's the push i needed to make for Ari TO STOP BEING VAGUE TO ME.

Bebop (named after Cowboy Bebop don't call me a weeb) has been formed yesterday and it's me, Emma and Ari. What a Galapagos reunion. Ari told that the majority alliance's plan is to split the votes 3-2-2. The 3 is possibly me because it's no secret Emma is going to play an idol. If no shenanigans happen it should be 3 for Dan, 2 for me and 2 for Emma with Dan going home but I do not feel good about this plan because if an idol is played then there's a high chance another one will. I plan on taking Emma's idol and playing it for myself with the reasoning is that there are people willing to keep Emma because of her goat status over me.

What's interesting to me is that Ari told me that Jacob doesn't like Dan and I'm not exactly sure why but if Jacob is open to voting Dan then I more than welcome it. Me, Emma, Ari and Jacob is the alliance that I've been wanting since merge started and how that hasn't been solidified yet is tragic. They're the three people I enjoy talking to the most. I mean, Taylor's great too but she's coming after me so she gotta go! The way that she messaged Ari saying "Are you sure it was the right choice to keep Josh?"....ARI OF ALL PEOPLE. Well, I'm glad the secret pair beware of #TeamLasagna is still going strong. Now that Ari has become less vague I know I can trust them a lot more.

i literally do not understand any of these people and it is driving me NUTS!!!

ok ok ok so like. josh tells me this morning that taylor said she wants to make a move on me because she heard i was talking to people one-on-one about her being most likely to flip. i immediately go oh f*#&$&#@ dan because i had SORT OF said that in our call yesterday so ofc he twisted it and used it against me. except!! then taylor herself calls me and says "josh came to me and asked if i trusted you and i wanted to get info from him so i made up this lie about how you'd said i was most likely to flip, i'm concerned he's coming for you" and i'm like oh f*#&$%#@ me. ofc my first instinct is to think she's lying as it seems like far too big of a coincidence for her to randomly come up with this story that is partially true..... BUT why on earth would she be telling me all this then? does she want to flush my idol? did she think the story would come back to me and wanted to get ahead of it? either way it doesn't make sense for her to say anything if she truly wants to vote me out, but the coincidence.... too much....... and should i be less certain of my relationship with josh? or are both their versions of the story true and they both don't want me out? my head is pounding i swear. plus jacob said that taylor told him she's "worried" about me because of what josh was saying, which lends more credibility to the idea she's being earnest in not wanting me out UNLESS she is aware of how close we are and assumes i'd tell him (i did)? I DON'T KNOW I JUST DO NOT KNOW

and then if that ISN'T enough, i have dan over here being completely erratic, first telling me how bad a day he's had that he almost wants to ask to be voted out, then saying that josh had thrown my name out which like ya i told josh he could do that. but dan's like "i'm not voting you ari i would never" and it's frustrating cuz he knows how to get to my emotions and i wanna believe him! i really do! especially since if he truly wanted me out he shouldn't tell me any of that shit. but i can't trust it i can't!!!!!! it's too risky!!!!!! ughhhhhhh

tl;dr this vote is a mindfuck and i'm 99% going to play my idol because i don't trust any of these fools anymore

also if i had a dollar for every time i tell jacob he needs to go be convincing to someone and he's like "ok bet" and fifteen minutes later that person is telling me "idk about jacob he's being so vague didn't really give me anything" i would have enough money to buy back my gun after i use it tonight

Y’all, sadly I think I’ve yeed my last haw

Well ignore my last confessional i dont want ari out idc how big of a threat they are or good at the game they are im gonna be loyal as i can to them idk before this i thought big moves and like flipping plus being kinda deceitful was to win i did get pots last year for playing that game tho but its like idk i feel like a new side to me like i rather be loyal to people who i been loyal to from the start and not make a move just to make a big move if i lose 7-0 so be it this game i had hopes of people working with me then being deceitful to me so i am just gonna do whatever tf i want this doesnt mean i dont like the people who i am against i think this merge was full of lovely people but theres people i am more loyal then others i honestly gave josh my idol to play because i rather not be alone without them in this game then be dragged to the end by somebody else also this is funny in orgs i thought years and years back ago me and ari are like oil and water, ketchup and ice cream but playing this game with them has been so much fun!! Also if i some how get betrayed or voted off in any round its okay NNN yeah i wish i had more of a game to prove but its very hard when everyone has different connections i really hope dan isnt super mad at me voting them off i really like dan as a person sometimes im dry in his pms but i did love like playing this game with them!! also i wish i can delete my first conf nnn

ugh i am just truly unsatisfied with this round no matter how it actually shakes out. i dont know what to say to taylor about dan going and i'm frankly too tired to think about it, i hate that im most likely wasting my idol but i would kick myself if i didn't play it & got stabbed, and i'm sad about the collapse of the adoption centre which is partly/mostly my fault anyway. i would like to get this over with as quickly as possible.

7th place isn’t something to be sad about I guess. Just wish I could have made it farther. I’m gonna be the most bitter juror out there tbh haha sorry Ari! 

This round is so scary I feel really bad about Dan 

i'm so nervous about who is gonna go omg i haven't heard my name at all but i am still nervous and idk who to trust ahhhh

I came from the best player to the one going home 

Power Rankings ONE - JACOB (+2) Threat: 6 (+2) Trust: 2 (NC) Looking back on this round, I didn’t realize how much power Jacob really had. Jacob could have single handedly sent dan home, but failed to communicate his intentions with the minority. Had Jacob of done this, I could have easily seen him sitting in the final 2. However, this misstep will have major consequences on his game. TWO - TAYLOR (+4) Threat: 7 (+2) Finally getting myself back into a position of power. Regardless of my downfall last round, I picked myself back up and went out of my way to message josh and Emma to see if they’d like to do something. Fortunately for me, they did. I could have sent dan home this round if Jacob had of talked to me (but he had no service). I would have been sitting pretty is a majority of 3 with Emma and josh. Threat level back up, back on track to win the game. THREE - JOSH (+1) Threat: 7 (+3) Trust: 7 (+5) Just like I predicted last round, Josh realized it was time to start making the right moves to get himself further. He just needed to break up the trio. I credit myself more than I credit josh though because I reached out to him, had I not of, he could have went home. But him joining with me was a good move for his game and he recognizes that. FOUR - EMMA (+1) Threat: 4 (+2) Trust: 7 (+5) Emma, similarity to josh had a good round because of me approaching them. Emma and josh didn’t even realize their games were at risk until I figured out that Ari, dan and Jacob weren’t voting me, rather voting one of them. Emma still left this round, but honestly if there was communication on Jacobs part about a flip on the revote, us 3 would have skated by. https://i.imgur.com/lFtZBsl.png FIVE - ARI (-4) Threat: 8 (-2) Trust: 1 (-1) Ari really lost control of their game at this point. Not only are they the biggest threat to win, but now they’re the biggest threat to win challenges. I also saw a different side of Ari that I can’t say I like. It’s funny because I used to always think to myself, “Ari seems nothing like an Aries, they’re so calm and wonderful and sweet” YEAH throw all of that out the window. Mad Ari is a different Ari lol. Anyways back on track, they for once I think were shocked by a vote, the double tie they had no control over. And finally, finally I think we are starting to see the decline of Ari’s game. Threat level is something I’m still trying to figure out how to control, and if you fail to control it like Ari did, you’ll see a similar result. SIX - DAN (-4) Threat: 4 (-3) Trust: 7 (+3) Dan lands here because of his failure to mend a relationship with me, now that I had Emma and josh wanting to work with me, Ari won immunity, and Jacob had an idol, it really only left me with the option of voting for dan. If Jacob had of said something, dan would have left this round. Because dan chose to link back up with Ari last round, and Ari lost control this round, subsequently that means dan also lost control. The one thing Dan has over is he isn’t seen as the biggest threat in the game.

[survivorsunsetrodeo]

Ep 10 | Am I Just Plain Irrelevant? - Josh

Soooo I am the partial owner of an idol with Taylor!!! So hopefully we get ourselves through this round. I need to tell Ari about it but I’m worried they’re gonna tell Taylor, so maybe I’ll just let it be for now. BUT I PROBABLY WILL TELL THEM RN hahahahaha. Idk if they’ll be mad about it or just happy it’s in someone’s hands. The bad thing is that someone has the whiskey too so that idol is out and about as well. I am BEAMING that the vote worked out as it should. 

WHEW ya boi really survived yet again despite being called out as most likable player in the game!!!!!! idk but i deserve some kind of award the vote went pretty much as expected minus all the scrambling/drama that rly isn't interesting to talk about.... now we have some new tea to spill which is a) idols and b) next moves.

a) the idol randomization this round is absolutely chefs kiss - taylor was planning to buy the last gun anyway which she has now done with the help of a loan from dan, and the only other idol that's active is the whiskey that me and jacob have been sipping + which still nobody suspects we have (i hope). taylor thinks josh has it so im like yeah mhm probably! anyway this means we dont have to worry about the vote going screwy and if we really needed we could play that, but i think that won't be necessary. b) so basically immediately after council, taylor says in the 3some group chat that she thinks it's time for jabari to go next and i said yeah good call i have no problem w that. the only people left here who aren't my bffs are jabari and emma, and jabari proved herself a loose cannon this round with trying to flip on ali so as much as i love her, she gotta go. with the newly solidified trust between taylor + dan, i really don't see how this could go wrong (knocks on wood) because that's been the biggest disconnect so far in our majority group and now they have something to share so that should be helpful in bringing everyone closer together.

in other news, taking stock of relationships - taylor dan jacob ali are all still saying they trust me over anyone and wanna take me to final three which is a very cute look for me but obviously i'm not gonna believe it till we get there. i'm starting to get a little worried about how much jacob knows my game, like i mean i tell him everything and im fine w that but i don't want him to get any funny ideas about how he can sell our story better than me! i'm also nervous about dan clocking the two of us because he said something just now about how we were both doing good at keeping people close, "[him] with taylor and [me] with jacob" which i mean yeah duh to an extent i know everyone knows this but i'm still trying my best to distance myself as much as possible. ali im not worried about obvi and taylor i don't think she will vote me out until close to the end so that gives me time to figure out what to do about her at that point. so likeeee i think we should be good for a while? i've bought myself a couple more rounds probably before i have to really start hustling? we'll see but these fools really did say "ari is the most likeable and talented person in this game let's keep them around <3" they will regret it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I feel bad for Nic he seemed to have spiraled after the tribal Brandi went. I wonder if this was avoidable but people aren't gonna let the AARP roam free when everyone knows about us which is exactly what I've been thinking from the start. From now on I really have to play smarter. I've been trying to limit the info I give to Ari but I need someone to be 100% honest with and like I'm not a dummy to bring Ari to FTC they'd wipe the floor with me. They just have so much connections and is basically untouchable but people will have to catch up eventually. This is why you always go 5th!!! But for now I plan to hide behind Ari because they're a big target. I honestly dont believe Ari got extorted like lmao ok you've been voted for everything good on touchy subjects and you get extorted for money?? but i'll go along with it and Emma seems to have bad reads so I'm not sure how much I can rely on her to sus things out but I need her as a vote and to pool money with. Taylor seems to be the most open and fluid player so I need to keep a close eye on her. After losing Nic my trust ranking is something like this: 1. Emma* (I just trust Emma the most at this point but I can't let her know everything) 2. Ari* (I also trust Ari the most but I have to limit the info I give to them and only give info that is personally relevant to them) 3. Taylor 4. Jacob 5. Dan 6. Jabari 7. Ali (please do not take 48 hours to reply back or send conversation enders I'm not good at talking to people)

https://prnt.sc/xjoq7k

I'm really annoyed at how Ari seems to be keeping things from me all the time and then telling me things at the last minute where I wouldn't be able to do anything and my dumbass here keeps on telling them things all the time and now Ari told me they lied about their horses? Literally what am I supposed to do Ari is so vague all the time!! I'm not in any position to lie about my horses because I'm taking this opportunity to gain allies but really all this does is make me not trust a lot of people. I don't know who to trust but I don't have the luxury to choose so I'm just blindly gonna follow Ari because they're the only one giving me info. Dan also said he wants to talk to me and Jacob came clean on why he lied to me but I'm just really annoyed. I was in no position to do anything to save Nic and I've been telling everyone I would be fine if Nic goes just tell me if people are voting for him AND THEY DIDN'T TELL ME ANYTHING? What did they think I was gonna do I haven't bought things from the shop they should know I've been giving Emma money so what the heck yall.

I'm really hoping my talk with Dan will help illuminate some stuff because I'm only getting things from one source (well two but Emma's reads are kinda bad) and I don't even know how long Ari wants me around since Ari is the most well connected person here so all I'm doing is getting on Ari's good side and with my back against the wall I just have to trust them....but I have to play smart if I can survive this next round I think I'll have a general idea on where people stand. I think it would be very funny if I send Ari home at 5th place for the memes but I don't have any pull to even do that.

PS: if you're reading this Ari ily but yes i am very annoyed at the moment <3

Another PS: Am I overestimating my impact in this game or am i just plain irrelevant.

If Jabari wasn’t dead to me in this game before, she certainly is now! She just got off a call with Ali and said I voted him out and she voted to keep him. What a fool. Obviously Ali is gonna tell me about it. He told Taylor first which is..... scary to me because maybe he’s closer with her than me. But he still told me so.

I just wanna make sure if I get to f5, I’m not outnumbered by an OG Beeho alliance that they’ve had from day 1.... which is a possibility but 5th place is also kinda cute? 

alright alright alright okay okay okay i need to be a little less cocky here yeah. the rope purchase this round shook me because i have no mf clue who did that or why and that BOTHERS ME!! we're 99% sure jabari has the rifle, josh would tell me if he did it, and none of my ppl are dumb enough to waste their money on that in the middle of a round so like......... it has to be emma??????????????? but where did emma get that money???????? man i dont know. it bothers me.

either way though, basically it has to be jabari this round and the only possible obstacle is if dan/taylor get too freaked about her possibly having the whiskey. i kinda sorta brought up to jacob that we might want to tell them about it but i think he doesnt rly wanna tell anyone and i don't super want to either so we're just saying josh prob has it, sorry josh, i know u don't drink. so hopefully that should be okay idk i don't see another way this could go wrong but i also have immunity so like that helps.

im also Very Worried about whatever twist is coming down the pike because the ftc schedule does not add up and my spidey senses are tingling i just really hope it's not someone coming back because that would be no fun at all. well ok chloe could come back i'd be fine with that <3

i really don't know how to feel abt my personal relationships w everyone because dan keeps saying like he wants to be with me in the end he doesn't care if he loses as long as he gets to play with good people etc etc and it sounds too good to be true but somehow i believe him? but i gotta keep my head in the game. and then taylor, our talks have gotten more personal lately and she's been just saying so much of how amazing she thinks i am and how grateful she is we've met and i'm not saying i don't believe that, i'm just saying it makes me nervous because i can't let that distract me from the very real possibility she makes a move against me at some point. it's safest to assume dan and taylor will come together to flip on me EVENTUALLY and probably SOON so we just have to get there first. which is why my priority thus far in merge has been eliminating all the wild cards as quickly as possible. brandi we didn't know where she was truly at, nic would have kept shaking things up, and jabari's so hard to read because the way she plays is just on a different level from everybody else. so if all of them are gone, then i'm really truly not worried about josh or emma because they're both floaters not scramblers and that leaves me with a group of people whose motives i can understand and predict at least to some extent. the devils you know, right? so hopefully i can keep that up and keep a step ahead of them for a while longer!!

i'm getting a little too used to this look.... https://prnt.sc/xl0ne8

Welcome to my Ted Talk :D

I have been hurt  by this game, I know I am not a bad person, I am loved in my personal life because I love giving. I guess people do not really get how real I am. It is just sad. I never have won an ORG and I really want too. :(

I get its a game and all but i was gutted when people lied to me about horses, it honestly makes me think there's bigger things at play. I might have to find other options in this case 

so many thoughts... um i'm starting to think a lot more about how to get to the end game with ppl that i think i can beat and it's just a lot to think about and i'm afraid if i'm gonna do that i'm gonna piss a lot of ppl off by making big moves and stuff and that is just so scary to me but it must be done

I heard it was jabari but why ppl just going for people in the bottom thinking about just telling jabari hey girl if u have an idol play it im burnt out because im on the very outs the only person here is making me wanting to play is josh if hes gone its gonna be super hard to play this game without them my will to play = lost even tho its hard now rather me then him going if the jabari thing is a lie.

Y’all I am SPENT. I just feel like each round I find myself slipping deeper and deeper into crackheadery and I need to RELAX. I am really proud of the game I have been playing and if I go out now, I’m going to be crushed but also proud. I would be proud of the fact that I was seen as a threat and got taken out bc of it. I don’t want to think negatively but there are SO many idols in play it’s hard to really navigate these votes.

I know the shotgun is with me and Taylor but this fricken whiskey is MIA??? I am hoping someone like Ari has it. They have been really certain that no BS is gonna go down tonight, but how can you be so sure unless you have the idol no one knows the location of?? I mean they’re also safe with immunity so idk.

I am just gonna hope I’ve put enough work in with people to not get voted out tonight. And if I do, it is what it is! 

Power Rankings: ONE - ARI  (+1) Threat: 9 (-1) Trust: 9 (NC) This week was definitely Ari’s week. They won immunity, had everyone give them the correct horses. They also got put in an alliance with josh and I where we got good intel from the other side and what they’re thinking. I think anyone would be stupid to believe that Ari isn’t the biggest threat in the game. TWO - TAYLOR (+1) Threat: 8 (+1) I put myself at two for the same reasons as Ari. I think the other side is opening up to me more now that nic is gone, I have more info. I’m also trying to make people feel guilty for listening to nic. Really using manipulation in a sense to make them feel bad for me. I also want good rapport with them as jury management is key in this stage. THREE - JACOB (+2) Threat: 7 (NC) Trust: 7 (-1) Jacob is someone I’m surprised to seee high this week. However, with being included in the whispers last round, and again this round without his name coming up, I think he deserves to rank third this round. Jacob’s game is very under the radar, and hes playing really well with the power to take the game in the direction he wants. FOUR - JOSH (+4) Threat: 4 (NC) Trust: 6 (+1) Josh got to work this round which is a pleasant surprise. He made an alliance with Ari and I which was a great move for his game. There is also a really good chance he has an idol this round. So he does hold a lot of power and information compared to his past rounds. FIVE - ALI (+2) Threat: 4 (NC) Trust: 10 (+1) Ali seems to have steered clear of his name being on the chopping block this round. Honestly Nic going last round is just as good of a move for my game as it was Ali’s. He just doesn’t have as much information and if he does get any information he comes directly to Ari and I. SIX - DAN (-5) Threat: 8 (NC) Trust: 9 (+1) Dan really plummeted this week as every crazy good week normally follows a terrible week unless you do the right damage control. I think Dan is complacent in our alliance and felt the need to not worry about the mess he was going to leave behind after nic left. But now people don’t trust him, and his name has been brought up by the minority. SEVEN - EMMA (+1) Threat: 1 (+1) Trust: 4 (+4) Emma like usual is toward the end of the power rankings. Her and I did clear the air, but I still don’t like how she just let nic dictate how she played the game. I understand she’s extremely loyal but to not talk to someone for three rounds because your ally doesn’t like them is questionable gameplay. It’s likely Emma goes this round if Jabari idols. EIGHT - JABARI (-4) Threat: 6 (+3) Trust: 0 (-2) After the shady round jabari had last week, it’s no surprise she’s in hot water this round. She also did a terrible job damage controlling the situation. She lied and said Dan flipped, threw multiple people under the bus, and no she’s acting extremely nervous. She’s become everyone’s number one target because she tried to flip at the wrong time.

Okay so im nervous but if i go it isss what it isss Jabari is the plan i think theres a big chance she has an idol im like debating if i should yolo it and throw my vote at jacob i love jacob but i feel like at this point they are kinda in the core alliance how i see it maybe rn are like ari-ali-jacob jacob with dan > Taylor > Jabari i am glad that me and taylor either are good or gonna end this game good idk if i am going yet but after this vote if i survive i really want to work with taylor!! either way i have nothing bad to say about taylor i think shes great me working with nic kinda hindered trust there but i am to loyal to default this game i do love nic tho but atleast i kinda have a game to play!! idk i am also probably just gonna vote for jabari because if its like 4-3-1 mega oof ASDFG i dont trust any of these hoes yet except for josh oh well if i go which i think its a high chance of me going atleast he gets 400 dollars richer hehe also i didnt even want jabari out at first but then she tried to throw me under the bus to dan smh

dont trust anyone not even urself

[survivorsunsetrodeo]

Ep 9 | I’d Rather Make Moves When I Need To - Emma

Okay, I am so sad Brandi is gone, but at the same time, it's not the worst thing for my game.  The good part of it is that we tried to make a move on Emma, we flushed an idol, and we weren't detected. I think this twist is actually super helpful in these moments because if you try something, and it fails, no one knows unless it gets leaked.

Another good thing is that Taylor's closest ally is now gone. I know that Taylor is super close with Ari, which is good, but I also want her to be super close with me. Not just for strategy reasons. She's also super cool and I like talking to her! Apparently she did tell JABARI of all people the vote was on Emma, so no wonder they knew how to idol tonight lmao.

Idk I feel pretty okay about my position in the game playing the middle rn I just need to not spread myself too thin and keep the targets in front of me. 

Soooo Tribal went off without a single hitch. brandi went home despite playing both of her advantages and Jacob wasn’t even near getting voted out. The main clownery of the night happened right after tribal. Ali started going on about how he felt like Brandi didn’t deserve to go home, when there were people currently in the game who didn’t care. If you think she deserved to stay, maybe you should’ve given her your immunity? Or better yet, volunteered to go home? And while we’re on the topic of who cares, haven’t you either flopped in or just not submitted in multiple challenges? Since I was still on the tribal call, I asked him who he was talking about, even though I kind of had a good idea of who it was already. He said Emma. and since Emma wasn’t there, we are aligned, and I know she was going through some things, I felt the need to stick up for her. I found it pretty disrespectful that Ali would say that so it did make me a bit mad. I of course alerted Emma right after it happened because I feel like she deserve to know, and she confronted Ali about it in the call after tribal. I’m sure everyone knows Emma and I are working together now, but I couldn’t let her be dragged through the mud like that. I’m really worried Ali and Taylor, who I know are aligned, will try to target me now. I understand where Ali was coming from though. I’m also a person who is driven by my emotions and I tend to say stuff without thinking about it first.

WELL all things considered that vote went pretty alright! i didn't manage to mist emma into using an idol for jacob so they could get blindsided, but other than that, things worked out pretty much how i hoped. jacob was saved, an idol (and lots of money) was flushed, and i can plausibly tell both sides that i voted with them even tho actually i voted ali for insurance purposes >:~) also we got major info about the location of the other idol when brandi didn't play it and it didn't go back into the shop, i.e. jabari MUST have it because there's no other possible place it could be. i know none of my people have it, and nic was so convinced that me/jacob did that i have to believe none of that group have it either, which leaves little old jabari who's been asking soooo many questions about everyone's funds and where items could possibly be. color me a little shocked but honestly kudos to her! now she gets to stay alive another round since that gun is an idol again.

other shop updates are that taylor's gonna buy something next round and so is dan probably, which will be great for getting them out of other people's hands and knowing for sure where they are. i can't believe i own shares in 2 of the 3 items currently in the game, how cute of me honestly. everyone else is now broke so that's delightful, i prob should've extorted myself for even more money so they'd think i was fully broke too but ah well what can you do.

i am a little worried about how ali's antics last night could potentially reflect back on me this round but i think i've done a pretty good job of covering my tracks there - i talked to both nic and emma immediately after and was like yeah i don't condone that behavior, and josh knows i wanted ali out over jacob because i got him to throw a vote that way with me, and obviously none of taylor/dan/jacob are gonna let me get targeted for that either sooooo i think i'm all good. once again, jabari is a wild card but i think i trust her a little more after my call with her yesterday and i don't think she would have the pull to do anything anyway.

so at last i can have a day of peaceful rest while i await these awful touchy subjects results! me taylor and ali are making a music video so that'll keep me busy for a while. overall feeling very grateful and blessed to not be stressed at this current moment in time!!!

Not mr ali making me regret voting off brandi out should of been ali oh well no point in voting him out now tbh that would be a waste things i think are slowly getting better for me i am talking to jacob and ari more idk how to approach taylor because ik we on different sides but ik we may or may not need eachother soon i feel so bad about brandi she was probably the nicest person here i said this about megs but brandi for second chances.. Yeah i just need to think of something that will seperate my gameplay from josh and nic if im stuck with them eventually that means i could get myself voted off its hard to like make moves rn but i rather make moves when i need to make moves.

also maybe ali should of put his immunity on brandi and not ari >:)

i also hope i break the record for most wasted idols im coming for that record im also so nervous about the future of the game i dont wanna just follow ppl around but like i kinda fucked myself over due to reasons out of my control oop

I just sent my nightly hellos to people and that’s already too much social interaction for me

I’m already fricken paranoid about this round and we haven’t even gotten immunity results ugh. I think it’s because I know I flipped that mastermind comp. like I really could have done much better than I did.

Additionally everyone was so quiet today so I’m just assuming everyone hates me and wants me to die. 

am i playing a good utr game or do people just forget i exist? i've got a lot of good (but conflicting) info from Dan and Taylor and I want to sit down and compare notes with Ari BUT WHERE ARE THEY you can't expect me to remember all this by tomorrow. I feel like I have somewhat of a good relationship with everyone aside from Ali and Jabari and I feel like I've gotten a few info that I find personally relevant moving forward but I need someone to compare this with. I think I'm playing a much more smarter game than before.

[Tumblr Survivor Riau reference] I feel like I was in a position like this before where I had the opportunity to play a good game being in the middle but fucked it up and sent one of my allies home because I was vetoed by my actual alliance [end Tumblr Survivor reference] so I'm doing the same thing this time around but keeping my sources a secret. The only person I am 100% honest is Ari and I hope it's mutual. I obviously can't take Ari with me to FTC but what I need the most are honest opinions and legit information and i think both of us are providing just that with each other.

ali needs to stop saying dumb shit to nic because it ALWAYS gets back to dan and i have to be like "omg lol im sure he didnt mean that" while running to ali and being like "hushhhhhh"

anyway i think the best thing i can do today is sit back and let everyone else tire themselves out scrambling and stressing!! it'll all resolve itself eventually and if it doesnt then oh well

I wasn't going to be making a confessional because I didn't wanna get an OTTN5 edit and also I felt like it was obvious I was going home and I had nothing to really say. There is a tiny bit of hope now, and it lies with Jabari and Dan. If everyone is telling me the truth, I will be staying. And if I do, I'd love to create a 5-person majority alliance with me, Dan, Jabari, Emma, and Josh. It'd honestly be perfect. I really like them all and am comfortable with them all.

If I go home, I wont be mad or anything, I'll just be sad that I didn't really come across the way I had hoped to in this ORG. I feel like a lot of things didn't come across correctly, and a lot of things were just pinned on me that were outside of my control.

Oh well. Let me remain positive. This is me being positive :] (Also I'm forever thankful for having Josh and Emma as allies without them I would've gone crazy by now. Thank you for everything you do.)

Power Rankings: ONE - DAN (+2) Threat: 8 (+2) Trust: 8 (+3) Dan’s at the top of the rankings this week because he’s in the position that I wish I were in. Despite losing Brandi, who was Dan’s #1 idled out by the minority alliance, he still was approached by the minority to vote with them. He knows each plan and he can decide whether he wants to flip or not. He decides who goes home this round. TWO - ARI (-1) Threat: 10 (+1) Trust: 9 (+1) Ari ranks #2 because they know everything that’s going on and they know it first. They’re the first to hear about any messiness or change to a plan. They aren’t included in it necessarily, but they hear about it. Ari’s threat level though is through the roof and hiding behind them as a meat shield is going to be key for my game. They should want to take a shot at Ari before me, and I plan to keep it that way. THREE - TAYLOR (-1) Threat: 7 (NC) Im starting to lose grasp and hold on my power as more of my allies leave. If the minority perception and gameplay wasn’t so awful I would have a lot more control over what goes on this round. Its just bad survivor gameplay to assume someone would never work with you because you voted their allies out. Because what they fail to see is that regardless of if im included in their plans or not, I still find out. I had 3 different people approach me that me name was out as I woke up at 9am this morning. It shows I have control, I just wish they’d include me so I had the power to deal with it rather than relying on others. FOUR - JABARI (+3) Threat: 3 (+1) Trust: 2 (-2) Jabari is here because she seems to want to give the minority.a chance. I don’t really understand her logic because regardless she’s at the bottom of an alliance. The one round where the majority wanted to count on her to prove she’s with us, she jumps. And she doesn’t even know that she’s completely fucking her game because of it. On top of that every suspects she has an idol. She only ranks 4 because of the information she is receiving, but she’s no threat because her gameplay is poor and everyone believes the rumour of her having an idol. FIVE - JACOB (+1) Threat: 7 (+1) Trust: 8 (NC) Jacob does know what each side is going to do, but unfortunately hes always the last to find out. Im not sure if its because of how late he sleeps in, or if hes everyones last resort but either way it’s not good for his power ranking. Jacob’s smart, hes going to be seen as an immunity threat sooner rather than later. SIX - NIC (+3) Threat: 3 (+1) Trust: 0 (NC) Nic is in 6th because hes the only one trying to steer a vote on the other side. He isn’t doing it successfully, but hes trying. If only he could put as much effort into challenges and he would trying to get people to save him. I dont trust him at all, he threw my name out. He has a little influence over Jabari, but that’s not too big of a success. SEVEN - ALI (-2) 
Threat: 1 (-2) Trust: 9 (-1) Ali unfortunately just doesn’t have the power he needs to get himself out of situations like he is in this round. When the name was between Ali and I it should have easily landed on me. But Ali doesn’t have the social capital that I do, which is why I had multiple people tell that side “lets do Ali over Taylor”. Not to mention Ali made a hugeeee mistake buying the dress for literally no reason. But I trust him I guess? EIGHT - JOSH (NC) Threat: 4 (+2) Trust: 5 (+2) Im starting to see a little fire with josh come out this round and im happy. Hes not willing to do anything about it, but the gears are turning in his head. I think our relationship will be important down the line but as of now he has no power and just follows everything Nic says. NINE - EMMA (NC) Threat: 0 (NC) Trust: 0 (NC) I literally don’t have anything to say about Emma. She doesn’t talk, doesn’t do the challenge, doesn’t care. Not worth my time.

I feel like im not winning this game unless if nic goes and josh goes right after idk im feeling a bit bad how im playing i was planning to go balls to the wall but like i find it really hard to do that when i am a known goat for something i could not control i try hard to change what people to see but idk how to do it anymore im totally not gonna stab josh and nic in the back at this point i just cant write their names down.

This vote is for all of the victims of the people that nic has voted off, nic is going home I know of it. All he's been doing has been working against me and for that ciao Bella 

GOD. What a day. I was pulled back and forth about this vote by both sides and this vote.

Ari/Jacob/Ali/Taylor want me to vote Nic Jabari/Nic/Josh/Emma want me to vote Ali

Neither option is ✨great✨ for my game. But we can’t vote out Jabari for personal reasons so here we are.

I’m worried about idols and such, but at the end of the day, I can’t get too in my head. If the idol comes out as long as they don’t end up voting for me instead of Ali... we’re good!

I’m voting for Nic because I don’t fuck with people who try to make you feel like you’re gonna lose if you don’t roll with them.  Even on OG Pearl he didn’t take a ton of time to get to know me and even now all he wants to do is talk game. In comparison, TSL has known me two rounds and I know so much about her.

Obviously voting out ANOTHER OG Pearl probably isn’t wise, but at the end of the day, New Pearl and OG Beeho seem to be the people I bond with the most and trust the most. And I might be dumb, but I am enjoying their company and would be proud losing to any of them. 

[survivorsunsetrodeo]

Ep 8 Pt 1 | I Am The Loop! - Taylor

THE WAY I PLAYED MYSELF OMFGGGGG

If I had just fricken voted for Chloe lmfao!!!!! God I am the worst Survivor player ever.  The good news is that I think everyone kept me on the revote????

Frankly, I may have fucked up my game, but at least it was the round before merge maybe??? I don't know if jury will start after this next tribal, but my goal was merge and I am PRAYING to all that is holy that I made it.

Holy fuck!!! Megs going and two idol plays!!!! We love the drama!!!!! I manifested Megs going before merge and here it is! 

Just so y'all know what went down....

I voted for Jacob, BUT I told Jacob I voted for Ali and I also told Ali I voted for Ali.... lmao BECAUSE ALI SAID HE VOTED FOR ME!!!

This is honestly the most crackheaded thing I've ever done. Ari knows that I voted for Jacob.... which could be bad? but I trust them not to expose me just yet. 

Y’all making merge is such a fricken relief honestly. But also I’m scared af. I think there are a lot of eyes on me. I’ve survived so many tribal councils. People have to know I’m connected. I am not gonna down play it necessarily but I’m gonna try to blend in.

It seems like there are quite a few people mad at each other frim the other tribe. I can see Nic and Brandi being targets quickly bc of their tribes last tribal council. I need to minimize my target as much as I can now. I need to like meditate on it and see what I think is best.

First impressions of the two people I haven’t met yet are:

Jabari - very outspoken, had great energy. I think jabari is likely fiercely loyal but not afraid to play dirty when she has to. I wanna pick her brain a little bit about her swap tribe dynamics. TSL - I really like her! She has a good spirit and seems like a really strong social player. She is someone to watch out for but could be a good person to have on my side.

My plan moving forward is to stay swap tribe strong for as long as I can, but also, if Ali needs to go home.... he needs to go hone 

WE DID IT I MADE MERGE I CAN FINALLY BREATHE AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

oh my god oh my god okay. so tonight HAPPENED and i sure did predict it right from the start! i sure did tell ali not to do it and he sure did it anyway! but it's fine this is actually kind of excellent because it means me and jacob look entirely innocent, dan now trusts me even more fully and feels guilty for not telling me what he was doing, i have less of an obvious connection to ali, and we can go into merge with the idea of drama / discontent in order to more effectively mine intel.

so anyways. all that aside, let's talk about MERGE itself! here's where i am at, should i choose to believe everything i've been told: -jacob and i are bffs final 2 until we die -ali and i are also obviously gucci always -dan allegedly trusts me more than anyone and constantly thanks me for being so amazing -josh and i are a secret pair beware where we'll have each other's backs even if we end up on different sides of the numbers -taylor is absolutely thrilled to have me back and acts like she's just regrown a missing arm about it -brandi wants to get to know me and is working with tsl so might actually mean it -nic and emma are ???? dont really care tbqh sorry -jabari is also very ?????? that's [checks notes] six out of nine people who at least have expressed interest in wanting to work with me, if not outright proclaiming their undying love & affection. do i believe all of it? hell no - but it's a pretty good starting point!

i think this season twist is actually going to work really well for me because usually when i make it to merge, the sequence of events is: a) ari wants to work with everyone, b) ari tries to work with everyone and play the middle hardcore, c) ari eventually gets caught playing the middle and sent home for being a threat. BUT this time there's so much more room to maneuver about the votes because i can literally tell anyone i voted however they wanted me to and there's no proof against it. so i guess my primary objective = get everyone to love me and be my bff jenna-style, then tell them what they want to hear, then pull all my puppet strings to get all of them out. listen, it's the first night of merge and i am allowing myself to dream big. while we're at it then, let's have my ideal bootlist!!!!

10th place: jabari. nothing personal, i just think she's the hardest person to connect with socially and strategically from my past experiences. maybe she'll prove me wrong, but from what others have told me about how she's been on the new beeho, it doesn't seem like it. also this round jacob wins immunity. 9th place: emma. i said it day one and i'll say it again... galapagos has spoken and they've gotta go. i win immunity this round and tsl buys a gun and tells nobody but me about it. 8th place: nic. this is mainly because i think dan has some kind of attachment to him that'll be hard to shake for a bit but by this point nic will have gotten himself into enough hot water and dicey scenarios that dan won't find him worth the trouble and will be happy to let him go. jacob wins immunity again, probably in a really cool big-brain live challenge. 7th place: this is where we get down to people i actually want to work with so it'll be interesting to navigate but i think josh has to go here. he hasn't been doing enough socially and i was never gonna take him to the end anyway. sorry host bestie! we'll mix it up this round and let dan win immunity just to feel good about himself bc he's probably had a rough few days and needs a break. 6th place: ali. ily bb but you gotta go sis, you're gonna drag me down with you if i let you get too far! i'll act like this is a big shocker to me but jacob will have found out about it. also i think an idol will get used this round for sure and maybe even another secret advantage. 5th place: this is the last time i can use my gun and by chance it happens to also be an idol so i am going to use it to shoot tsl outta this game. we'll let jacob win immunity again. 4th place: brandi. honestly you stuck it out way longer than i expected and it's been an honor getting to know you but you're far too likeable to get close to ftc! there will be some unnecessary drama but it won't actually matter that much. oh and jacob won immunity for the fourth time but he gave it up to me. 3rd place: i can't believe i let dan get this close to the end! sneaky sneaky! if it's a final three that's fine because i can attribute his early survival and merge moves to myself, but if it's final 2 then he's gotta go and tell the jury how great i am (i cried during the live tribal it was very emotional). i think we all forfeit immunity here as it's the only fair thing. 1st and 2nd place: ari and jacob will split the prize in a first-time-ever deadlock tie and will both share the rodeo crown. i win the fan favorite though obvs. tsl is player of the season and ali is the best villain and brandi is the hero that everyone loves. all the hosts pick jabari as their fave.

I made merge!! Yay! Me and Ari bout to secret pair beware this game #TeamLasagna

me josh and nic are the cutest alliance i feel so bad for megs but oh well she gonna win retirement home second chances she highkey ate thats why she had to go i feel like rn my chances are low rn of winning but im here to cause chaos have some fun and have me or my allies win special shout out to josh without them i would wanna quit but that would suck and shout out to nic too i am kinda scared for merge but im really excited i dont think these people would take the easy route if not thats not trying to win but who knows tbhh i kinda want old pearl back together lowkey but im not sure im trying to think of my target list rn so rn im just gonna try to be more social then i was a few rounds ago make sure that i can get my footing back like i did pre swap!

mmmmmm MMMMMMMMMMMMM this is starting to look very fun and festive over here! the more intel we gather the more it's becoming clear that this first vote is gonna be a taylor/brandi versus nic/emma/josh/jabari bonanza with the four of us sitting pretty getting to decide who we want to work with. i'm personally more inclined toward the taylor/brandi of it all, what a coincidence that the four people i was least enthused about are also all working together... gonna call with dan and compare notes more later but i am feeling very optimistic

also people i want to work with to people i want out v soon OG: Pearl Josh> Nic> Dan> Brandi this is tough i really love og pearl probs the fav og tribe i ever been on like ever...

og beeho Ari > Taylor (she a threat i think taylor is lovely and like them alot )but i dont wanna go super far with them ) > Jacob > Ali >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Jabari.. Jabari is nice but idk if i can work or trust with them tbh i like everyone left haha also im aware or think that ari is the biggest threat but would i maybe die on my sword for them.. if i work with them yeah.. im not that person that i was a few years ago 

Why is everything I know a lie? Apparently Megs never wanted me in her alliance of her, Brandi, Jabari, and Taylor to begin with and only added me because Jabari requested it? Which I guess is why they thought her and I were a duo? I'm having trouble understanding what Meg's vendetta was against me. I literally have spent the entire game trying to socialize with her and Brandi and I thought it was going well?????????????????????????????????? What did I do to her?????????????? Genuinely????????????????????

Anyway. Jabari is so kind. I really feel like I can trust her now. I feel like this merge vote will come down to Me/Emma/Jabari/Josh vs. Ali/Taylor/Brandi with Dan, Jacob, and Ari somewhere in the middle. I have the most confidence of Dan working with us but even with his vote it'd be 5-5, not to mention Brandi has a double vote. But atleast our side has an idol.

It seems like I am once again on the bottom for no reason. Even in her absence Megs is fucking me over. 

My headspace is so fucking bad rn about this game. I just feel like even tho I’m probably in a decent position that this competition will be won by more dominant people than me. This challenge definitely doesn’t play to my strengths and idk wtf to do.

I talked to Ari about it and they really want me to try hard but I just like really don’t care... if I’m the next to go, I’m the next to go. I must be such a horrible ally bc I am seriously checked out rn.

Dear Jsh, if you have any brain cells now is the time to use them. I need to speak to Brandi and Dan and solidify something with them. I also have to reach out to Ari to see if working with them is an option moving forward. I got the vibe last round that Taylor was only using me to survive the Megs and I mean....fair I was doing the same to her but I’m hoping she doesn’t find out that I’ve been lying to her by saying I voted Nic. I really hope Ari doesn’t snitch. I don’t think Ari is a rat but...you never know!

The way I see it me, Emma and Nic have two options. Work with Ari, Ali and Jacob or work with Brandi and Dan. Working with New Pearl seems like a no brainer since we hold majority easily but the question is if they ARE willing to work with us. The problem with solidifying an OG Pearl alliance is Brandi doesn’t trust Nic and I don’t trust Dan. What Nic wants to do is bring in Jabari and kick out Dan and have a 5 person alliance with AARP (me Nic and Emma) + Dan and Jabari which I am defenitely not on board moving forward. I can work with them for one round but I honestly would rather work with Ari and Jacob both who I actually talk to regularly. I just really need to make this alliance to happen because I like to work with people I actually get along with.

As far as the vote is concerned...Ideally I would like to vote out Taylor or Ali this round because I can’t figure out where they stand but Ali is an unlikely person to be voted out because Ari is protecting him.

first merge boot be lookin good for me if people dont put in effort into speaking to me why should i try? jabari i dont want to target them anymore its not smart i need to talk to brandi alot more also idk im kinda tired thank god i got the idol.

dan is having a rough time today and i feel bad :( it also doesn't help that ALI decided to tell nic that he thinks dan is a threat which ofc nic ran and told dan right away so i had to be like ali wtf don't do that!! and he was like no but its good for us bc they'll think we aren't close...... that is NOT THE POINT RIGHT NOW ALI!!!

[survivorsunsetrodeo]

Ep 7 | I Just Played Myself - Dan

I BOUGHT THE IDOL LMAOOOO EL PSY KONGROO MOTHERFUCKERS

I am so sorry Timmy, no I am not really, this round is a DOUBLE tribal oh hell no

Okay, amazing. I can never remember what I write in these things but yesterday I was thinking that I didn't want to take Nic to merge and spoke to Taylor about maybe getting Emma and Josh to vote with us and get Nic out if we go to tribal since I wasnt so sure about Brandi and Jabari's stance with him. Jabari was the one who wanted him in the 5 "alliance" and I wasn't sure how Brandi would feel about turning on the alliance.

BUUUUUT Brandi and I  were chatting this morning and I mentioned that Emma looked like the easy vote but Nic makes me nervous. Then was like, well, what if we vote Nic instead??? Uh, yes. What a great idea, Brandi!! She pitched it to Jabari and we're all in. We only need 4 but I think it'd be best if Josh and Emma were in on it too. Nic already thinks its Emma.

Sounds like Nic and Emma want to sit out of the immunity challenge. Perfection.

Nic has enough cash for an idol and its for sale this round. IDK if he'd buy and play it just to get through merge. If hes not playing the game he has to feel comfortable enough, right? If he does buy/play an idol Emma will go if he votes for her. I feel like he will. But just in case I think one of  the rest of the tribe should also vote Emma. If he throws a vote it'd be a 1-1 tie if he has immunity and we'd revote Emma, but I think that'd be unlikely. Whooo! A little bit of action. I'm getting what I want, Brandi feels like she's in charge, we're keeping our Beeho connections in tact and the whole new Beeho tribe feeling mostly comfortable. Perfect. We still have to get through today and tomorrow before tribal but I feel good.

You know, I was hoping we'd be able to stay immune until the merge, but clearly the universe is telling me its time to shake things up!

Emma and Josh are, at the point, the only solid allies I have in this game. Merging without them by my side would be awful for my game so at this point I'm going to do whatever I can to protect them.

Prior to reward results, Josh and I decided it would be best to purchase the Tier 1 and Tier 2 idols for this round as a way of not only protecting ourselves, but also making sure that no one else has them to screw with our plans.

I'm pretty sure that according to the Emo Elephant alliance of Jabari, Taylor, Megs, and Brandi, Emma is the target just because of her inactivity. I know though if she wins immunity, Josh will become the target because he's the only one left not in the alliance.

Emma winning immunity would actually be ideal, because then Josh could play his idol on himself, and I could play my idol on myself with the excuse of "I was worried they were voting for me." and it won't look like a coordinated thing.

I think Josh, Emma, and I will end up targeting either Jabari or Taylor. I like them both, but at this point I think it's still worth it to try and preserve an OG Pearl alliance at merge. There's essentially a whole tribe of people I haven't met yet so working with them would be unrealistic.

This vote is going to be crazy, and is definitely going to be the hardest one yet. I like everyone on this tribe and wouldn't be making this move unless I absolutely had to. 

I'm not well versed in Retirement Home Lore but I hope I somehow end up as the person who sat out of the most challenges.

Of course I wanted to win immunity tonight, but I think everything will be okay???? I mean they could easily vote me out going into a possible merge to have the numbers on OG Pearl, but... I just don't see that happening?

I mean I could be boo boo the fool rn but again, I would literally die for Ari. I just feel like we bond too much on a personal level for them to slit my throat at this point. At f7 on? Yeah it's fair game, but I think Ari needs me as much as I need them? Or maybe I'm just a narcissist. 

I think I’m in a better position than I originally thought? See the thing about having an idol is I feel like I can be a little more bolder and a little more reckless in the moves I’m trying to make. I probably don’t even need this idol but I’m still going to play it because I’m not about to waste $400 on an idol I won’t play the round it is an actual idol!

I reached out to Taylor telling her about a possible voting bloc of me, her, Jabari and Emma and try to vote out either Megs or Brandi. She seems receptive to it and she also thinks Jabari is open to making some moves. Which checks to what Jabari has been telling to Emma and myself that “As long as Taylor and I are here you aren’t going anywhere.”. I feel like Taylor is an unexpected ally for me. Ideally, me, Emma, Nic, Taylor and Jabari vote out either Megs because she seems to be more socially savvy than Brandi and I think I can still salvage something with Brandi. When we merge I follow Taylor with whatever connections she has on Old Beeho and try to set myself up where I’m protected on all sides.

Worst case scenario is Taylor rats this out to the alliance chat but not all is lost because I think Nic would be willing to play his idol for Emma. Nic is our little rat and I really appreciate him hehe. Now if this happen I really really want it to be a 1-1-1-0-0 vote. Imagine the chaos. El Psy Kongroo

I WON THE 21 FLAGS I REDEEMED MYSELF AND BROKE MY CURSE WHAT A HECKIN RELIEF

so glad my page of madman notes and my alliances with both the other players paid off whewwww. it's been forever since i've had an immunity necklace so i WILL be wearing it with pride! i'm definitely feeling a lot better about tonight's vote now that i have this, but also i am still pretty nervous because chloe has been far too quiet. i feel honestly so bad about not telling her the whole timmy thing but now im just confused like, did that break her and she's given up? or does she have some master scheme advantage shit that she's gonna pull out to make our lives hell? UGH i don't know. it's so awkward to try and talk to her about it and part of me feels like if she's not gonna make the effort i shouldn't either but :(((((( bad vibes y'all. i would have maybe even fought for her if she'd been trying harder, but like i can't just take someone into merge who's giving me nothing and who will probs blow up my spot as soon as we get to the new camp, so at this point the plan is to have me jacob dan vote for chloe and ali throw a vote on dan just in case, and just have chloe do whatever tf she wants i guess.

so the possibilities of what could happen tonight: 1) everything goes according to plan and chloe goes home without much fuss 2) chloe pulls out an idol, then it's either a) split vote between ali/dan and we vote dan on the revote or b) 3 votes negated 2 votes dan 3) if dan goes rogue and also throws a vote, it could get messy in even more ways - if he votes the same as chloe and she doesn't play an idol, we have a 2-2-1 tie where we'd want to revote chloe but then dan could get upset and loose cannon all over the place. if he votes the same as chloe and she does play an idol, whomever they voted (probs ali) goes home. if he votes different from chloe and she doesn't idol, it could either be a 2-1-1-1 or 2-2-1, and if he votes different from her and she does idol it's 1-1-1 or 2-1-1........

like, damn. this five-person vote is like the 3-2-1 flag combination in the challenge: on paper it seems better to have a lower number of factors to think about, but there's so many more ways you can divide and rearrange for different outcomes that you'd really rather avoid it at all costs. basically how i feel about all this is, if chloe sticks around my game is pretty much screwed but also as long as i can keep jacob, i'll have the strength to keep going. losing ali would suck bc he's a solid number always, losing dan would be painful bc i've really grown to like him and he's closer to a strategic match for me, but i have faith that me and jacob can overcome anything together. if jacob goes home somehow.................. i would be absolutely devastated. i'd have no choice but to go all scorched-earth on everyone's asses. if i lose jacob, everyone must suffer. so let's not let jacob go home tonight mmkay? <3

anyway, really hoping we do actually m*rge after this, my plan if chloe doesnt go home tonight is to throw myself at josh and tsl immediately and tell both of them i'll do whatever the fuck they want. if chloe does go home as planned, i'll still reach out to them but i can afford to be a bit more cool and aloof about it.

I think its cool I won immunity. But the double tribal is terrible ngl, I don't want anyone to go because we were such a powerful tribe and I get the reason why we are going. Doesn't make the choice any easier though, I have alot to ponder, I might not even know who I'm voting at tribal.

It all went tits up last time so fuck it 

I keep telling myself to smile and breath through the pain of being lied to and that I will get my revenge for Timmy in time. It’s so much more difficult being patient than losing my shit in tribe chat and yelling about everyone or randomly spreading a rumour that there’s a secret duo 

This tribal is very... suspicious. It's been quiet ALL DAY and Megs has been throwing my name under the bus to Emma and apparently to Taylor to. She told them that it was ME who came up with Emma's name and that I am not to be trusted. Now I'm not sure if she's saying all of that to convince Emma she's not going home or if she genuinely believes it but either way it's just another reason for me not to trust her. She is clearly a very strategic person who will do anything to ensure she has the power. Well Megs... you're about to be impeached and removed.

I literally have no idea what is going to happen at merge at this point. This tribal is really going to shake things up and anything could happen. I feel like chances are I'll be on the bottom come merge and will probably be an early merge boot, but is there anything I can really do about that? I didn't do anything to deserve being on the bottom of OG Pearl yet it's stuck with me this entire game. You could say I have a victim complex but I am the victim. 

why do these ppl think im dumb as hell thats my personality but not my brain they telling lies like jabari and nic are a duo how nic wants me out then i hear that megs spread my name now i feel chaotic i hope josh gives me his idol because like i really want to play this game i am better now it took a bit but im here and queer :DDD i have nothing against these ppl except jabari for basically pushing me away like if im still here in jury im making notes of this..

Oy! This should be so much easier than its been.

I'm so uncomfortable.

So earlier Brandi, Taylor, Jabari, and I agreed to take out Nic, despite having him in the alliance. Now Jabari seems like she's ready to fall on the sword for him? Where did that come from?? Nic claims he never talks to her.

Reached out to Emma and assured her I want her to stay and floated Nic to her. Obviously she was down. Then I tell her to be careful what she tells Jabari bc i think her and Nic are a pair and up to something. Emma says she talked to Jabari to plead her case and Jabari brushed her off and just said, "dw you're fine" but didnt give a name.

Jabari also floated to Taylor, "we could go with the group or make a move with Emma and Josh." And Taylor said "No" and then Jabari said okay, its between Emma and Josh then.

Like I don't know where Jabari's head is at. I feel like Taylor would tell me if she heard my name. I also feel like that'd be fucked up if Jabari wanted me out after I helped her practice for the immunity challenge but I really really dont know! Maybe its Brandi? Ugh

I trust Brandi and Taylor's vote.

I want to believe Emma will also vote Nic.

Josh doesnt seem to have a great strategic mind. I spoke to him a little last night before I went to bed and he suggested staying OG Pearl strong. Weak strategy but also we wont have majority unless Dan DOESNT go tonight. Then we'd go in even and Beeho would have proven to be very strong in their ties, what would stop any OG Pearl (me lol) from flipping and putting OG Pearl in the minority to pick off? No. I was trying to lead him to think Nic was the untrustworthy one but it either went over his head or he's also with Nic. By the number of times he says "I dont understand" or "I really don't get it" in a day, he might've just missed my subtle directing. Fortunately,  Emma said she'd talk to him and Brandi wants to give him a call before tribal and convince him to vote Nic.

And I just cant read Nic. I can't tell if he's comfortable or knows I don't trust him and is lying to me as much as I'm lying to him. Does he have an idol? He talks about the shop A LOT and had enough to buy one of them. He said his goal was to make it past merge so I wouldn't put it past him to buy and play one even if he was comfortable  just to make it.

Even that would be fine if I felt confident that the vote was on Emma and not me Brandi or Taylor. I feel like someone would tell at least one of us if something was up but if its Jabari Nic Emma and Josh together, thats a majority and whoever they vote is done.

Its so scary. I don't like being afraid so fuck it, I'm just going to vote Nic. I really feel like they arent voting TSL so in case it is me, ofc I want my buddy to have the best chance so I'm going to give her all my money before tribal. I would be surprised if I was voted out but better have a back up plan in case it goes awry. She'll give it back and I'll buy the top tier idol just before radomizing at what, 11 tonight? Kinda a waste to try to be sneaky since the item is taken out of the randomizer but *shrug*

So in conclusion I'm terrified but I'm still voting Nic. Getting Nic out would take out someone I'm suspicious of, eliminate the threat of a pair (Jabari/Nic), gain hopefully lasting loyalty from Emma for giving her a chance, and working with Taylor to get ins with Beeho in case they're very OG Beeho Strong. Jabari might be mad but she's so much better at games than me and I do NOT want to go to the end with her. She is a CHAMP.

These people are scrambling like crazy............... 

This should be the most easy straightforward vote of the season and I’m freaking the fuck out. It seems too good to be true that it’s Chloe.

Chloe has done very little to get out of this pickle she’s in. I’m very worried that she may have some sort of advantage that might get her out of this mess, but at the same time idk. She allegedly has no money because of exile. But is that because she got something for risking it??? Idfk man.

I’m tempted to throw a vote on Jacob just in case of an idol play and everyone else but Chloe votes for Chloe. Idk I mean no one would know? And if she cancels a vote or two it won’t matter. Idek I’m in my head sooooo bad

ahhhh i'm at work so sorry for no video but we are voting chloe tonight and dan ari and ali and i are in an alliance and we're going to attempt to dominate at merge so yay

So apparently Megs, Brandi, and Taylor are throwing my name out because they believe 1.) I've been the one causing all the drama and 2.) I'm in a duo with Jabari. I've literally never had a one on one strategic convo w/ Jabari and barely speak with her in general. Also I've made it a point to not cause drama this season AT ALL and remain calm and under the radar. So to see it all crash down on me regardless is really disheartening. I also really liked Brandi so to learn she was the one spreading the rumor that Jabari and I are a duo sucks. I'm really confused as to why all this drama is being created and then being pinned on me. Oh well.

To continue on this point..

All this drama is being stirred up and being pinned on me and it sucks. I used to be a super dramatic and chaotic person and I've literally made it such a point to change this season. It's why I went home season 1 and I've done everything in my power not to let that happen again. I'm not sure why Megs and Brandi were so quick to turn on me? Like honestly? Megs is kinda the villain of the season and Brandi is her minion. Like the Despicable Me type of Minion. Which makes Megs Gru. 

Power Rankings: ONE - TAYLOR (+1) Threat: 8 (+1)
 Fuck I don’t think I realized how much power I had over people until this round. Megs was close to being a goner this round, still could be but I fixed the situation unless an idol pops up. I had a call with josh where he basically said im his number one and will vote how I do because im the only one he trusts, so he should be voting Nic this round. I also got megs to give me all her money incase she leaves this round. TWO - MEGS (-1) Threat: 8 (-1) Trust: 10 (+1) This has been a wild round, megs rolls in at #2 for a couple reasons. People are onto her, they know how big her threat level is and I knew it would come. I think I stuck my neck out too much for her this round. But she still has enough control over people that I don’t have, like brandi, which is why she comes in at #2. THREE - BRANDI (NC) Threat: 6 (NC) Trust: 8 (+4) Brandi comes in at number 3 because no one is saying her name, she’s sitting pretty and not having to lift a finger. However, she is getting grouped with megs which could be a danger to her game. Brandi is definitely UTR, and doing a good job keeping it that way. Brandi’s trust shot up because I know she doesn’t have any other option right now that to stick with megs, and I know megs and I are good. FOUR - JABARI (NC) Threat: 8 (+3) Trust: 2 (-6) Jabari almost pulled off a massive move this round in getting megs, she included me in it however, and I was able to diffuse the bomb before it exploded. Her trying to make this move is why her threat level increases. She’s onto me though, she told josh that she thinks I leaked it to megs, which I did. So that’s why I dont trust her anymore, I need her to leave ASAP. FIVE - JOSH (NC) Threat: 3 (+1) Trust: 9 (+6) Josh and I made a lot of progress this round. We had our first one on one call where he told me I was his number one. He said he trusts me, he gave me a lot of info on his concerns and also what people have been telling him. I don’t think he has enough social capital to make things happen, and even if he did he wouldn’t do it without me. SIX - EMMA (NC) Threat: 1 (NC) Trust: 3 (NC) I think the only reason Emma isn’t a goner this round is because megs wants Nic gone. She kinda just does as she’s told and that’s about it. Not a terrible strategy but annoying for someone like me who doesn’t particularly trust her. Emma doesn’t have a lot of say in what happens, but is included in the majorities plans as Jabari wanted her a part of the megs blindside, and megs wanted her a part of the Nic blindside. SEVEN - NIC (NC) Threat: 6 (NC) Trust: 2 (-4) I had a very bad round with Nic. I can tell Jabari leaked to him that his name is out there, and I know hes come to me saying that people think hes stupid and hes talking about me. I dont think hes stupid, I just dont have trust built with him. He doesn’t hold a lot of power this round, he likely is the one leaving unless he has an idol. 

[survivorsunsetrodeo]

Ep 6 | I’m Trash and We’re Trash - Ari

That was way too scary, however, I feel as if my position in the game has changed. I am a power player. I have Dan and Jacob and Ari and we are going after Timmy and Chloe. Timmy is a good player who is close with Chloe, we need to let that go ASAP. I hope we lose these challenges so we can save TSL. I LOVE YOU TSL <3 

fun fact: i have never won a creative challenge despite being a graphic artist

this is. without a doubt. one of the most INFURIATING tribes i have EVER been on. and i have played with jordan pines so that's saying a lot.

it is [checks notes] 11:40 am on the second day of this music video challenge and let's see, what has everyone done so far? timmy: made an absolutely horrible album cover and then edited it to make it slightly less terrible jacob: sent me a 4 second clip of a shelf of alcohol ali: just said "wait what's the song we are using LOL" chloe: ???????? has run off into the irish countryside presumably never to return

me and dan are the only people who appear to really be trying here. dan made a beautiful immunity necklace & lipsynced atop a giant stuffed llama, and i've a) made the playlist, b) rearranged the playlist, c) written liner notes to explain all our (my) song choices, d) filmed about 10 minutes worth of footage of me being a complete fool, and e) edited together what sparse clips i have from everyone else into something that could perhaps resemble a music video if anyone else is actually inclined to contribute. i don't know what more i could have done here - i literally made a whole storyboard, told them specifically what kinds of clips i wanted, and said almost immediately "hey can you please get me your footage by noon on the day it's due?" and yet here we are, minutes away from noon on the day it's due, and it's looking an absolute disaster.

i'm pressed yeah! i'm annoyed that nobody seems to care about a single challenge in this game! i'm frustrated that i have the worst headache of my life and weird body aches that might be corona while i'm trying to get all of this done and not look like an asshole control freak but also not look like someone whose tribe is completely invisible! WHY DOES NOBODY WANT TO PLAY AND ALSO WIN???

in the words of chloe: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

im like seriously so ashamed of this music video right now, if i had BETTER QUALITY VIDEOS this could be so good but it's trash and i'm trash and we're trash and i want it to be over with

My acid reflux is acting up because of the wait for the challenge results. I hate it.

Goal of this round: get Timmy out.

Listen, I know I always vote Timmy out but he literally gives me NO GAME INFO. Like we know each other irl and he doesn’t talk to me like we do. It’s always one word answers and stuff like that.

I am praying that me telling Ari and Ali that I know Timmy doesn’t come back to bite me. I told them more that it could be used to pull in Jacob. I’m gonna check in with Ari at least and tell them that I’m with them 100% and not to worry about my relationship with Timmy. BUT ALSO THAT COULD MAKE IT WORSE???

I feel like me telling them my convo with Timmy when he said Ali’s name is enough for them to know that I’m with them 100%. As long as Ali remains calm and doesn’t freak out on Timmy we should be good. Ali throwing my name to Timmy is a good counter in my mind to avoid suspicion of us working together and to see if Timmy comes to me with said info.

I feel safer this round than most, the key swing vote is Jacob...

Is it petty and annoying of me to say Dan and Adam had it coming because of them excluding me from the alliance on OG pearl? Maybe. But I'm a petty and annoying person.

I'm so happy New Beeho has won literally every single challenge but it's also soooo boring not going to tribal. Like I love that I'm gonna be safe until the merge but also the fact that nothing is going on makes me wanna be dramatic for the sake of adding some fun back into the game. But that way of thinking is what caused me to go home the first time. My tribe was boring, and I wasn't, so I made a move for fun, and it backfired. This time, if my tribe's boring, then I'm boring too. I might as well be a tumbleweed up in here. 

not to get on too high of a horse right now but i feel like this vote is lining up perfectlyyyy.... i currently am in an alliance w everyone in the tribe, three of whom i trust at least 90 percent, two of whom i bought an idol with. there's six people left.

ali: will NOT vote me dan: could vote me but it'd have to be a pretty elaborate scheme on his part because in his mind i've put in work specifically to save him twice now + we've been commiserating about how godawful these challenges have been and we just get along so well i don't know what would be in it for him jacob: could vote me but i mean we just hung out on call for an hour last night talking about video games and popcorn and he could have easily left that convo if he wasn't into it and also i took all his money to buy a gun so what would be the point of washing all that money down the drain AND putting the gun back where someone else could get it

then there's chloe and timmy whom i have been wanting to take a shot at since the swap actually but i wasn't gonna make any big moves before the time was right. now the time IS right and i've got everyone all set up carefully - the me/dan/ali chat, the me/ali/jacob chat, maybe i'll even make a me/dan/jacob chat today if i get bored - to make it happen. all that really needs to be finished today is to reach a "decision" in the pickles chat with chloe/timmy as to who to vote (i'll have to give a convincing "i don't want to lose ali but i'm willing to if yall want that" speech) and then make sure dan and jacob both know the other one is down to keep ali (last night while on call with jacob i had him telling me what dan was saying and dan telling me what jacob was saying so that was chefs kiss) and then we shouldn't have to worry. there's no way timmy has an idol, and if he did i can whip out my gun i guess. im a little worried that chloe will be mad but she won't rly have any other options and i think i can get her to understand why we didn't want timmy around long term. 

We’re really doing a coin flip on who to vote out tonight and it just landed on Dan. I kinda don’t want this though and tbh would love to find a way to vote Ari because they are good with EVERYONE. But things could change and apparently they just did bc now we did 2 out of 3 bc I spoke and it landed on Ali then which I prefer moreso. I could tell in Ari’s voice they seem discontent but I’m not caring too much tbh. I could just throw a vote on them. But also nobody has an idol so it’s not like anyone could be fun with that unless there is enough money to pool onto an idol but if it’s on Ali then I’m not invested in saving him. 

MMMMMMM dan is so funny ugh king

last round there was the thing of him & adam both telling me the other wanted to buy an idol and now he's like "jacob said he thinks you and ali will be bigger threats at merge and that chloe/timmy would be a wash" when jacob told me he (dan) was saying that exact same thing while we were on call.............. i see u dan disbrow i see u and i'm ctfu! gotta respect it!

Ready for a switch up!! Nothing is happening on my tribe and it stresses me out in an unfun way.

I feel like its a little too early for merge, but just thinking about it:

I love Taylor and I'm hoping to use her old Beeho ties to get into the majority. Our game styles don't perfectly align, judging from the past, but we have strong trust in general. She does give me a bit too much credit for game play and has gotten paranoid about me before. I'm hoping she doesn't get scared of me this game bc at this point I want her to be my ride or die.

Brandi is a sweetheart. She's growing on me and is a great team player. I think I can trust her pretty deep in the game. However, she's already called me out for being a strong player so I also don't want her getting scared and turning against me post merge.

Josh is also a good team player. I'm not threatened by him and he's distracted by another org he's playing so he can be a number or expendable.

Jabari is a great team player and I'd also like to see what Beeho connections I can find with her as well. She's not a great conversationalist via DMs so that's been a little tough to connect.

Emma has been absent due to personal issues in another org. I want to be understanding but sad puppies bother me and I don't need drama. I hope she's doing okay, though. She might be an easy vote for bumming people out, but things have been so busy from the Star Power challenge that from what I know, not a lot of game play has happened this round over here so that kinda works in her favor.

Nic needs to go. I don't trust him one bit. I've  been having such fake conversations with him and i know he has to sense it. He did my tarot card reading a while ago so he has some kind of  higher intuition I guess. We are in an alliance and i told him I felt best with him and Brandi to keep him close but does he buy it? Probably not. He's not a team player and he has enough cash to buy and idol so these things worry me.

Dan kinda worries me long term but if he survives the night I'd be super curious if he was able to make a pitch to save himself or if someone on original Beeho made a move. He seems smart but also seems to with hold information. I'm open to reconnecting with him for sure. Brandi said she wanted to work with me and Dan at the start of the game.

I only know what TSL told me about the original Beeho tribe.

From what she told me she thinks Ari and Ali are a pair. That makes sense why Ali didn't go last round. Chloe and Timmy seem rather chummy as well. I wouldn't be surprised if those 4 paired up.

TSL said she wasn't in an alliance before the swap but thought one more day and she'd likely form one with Ari and Ali.

Unfortunately, I know my game doesn't jive with Ali's and I'm already annoyed that he's still in. And post merge he won't be a challenge threat so it'll be hard to convince people to get him out. Especially if he's in the majority alliance. Even if I get into that alliance I'd have no social capital to campaign against him.  

Well that's about it. Lets see how things go this round!! I'm fully expecting a swap, double tribal, or other twist veryyyyy soon :)

Darlene the Pink Revolver has been purchased. I'm assuming it was someone from the other tribe since it's $750 and there is no way someone on my tribe has that kind of money.....we're poor. It's also extremely quiet right now but I'm hoping that is because the pickles had a call earlier and we are all calm since we decided that Ali would be getting the boot tonight. If that doesn't happen I will be sus (if I stay) but I'm thinking positively because as far as I can tell, nobody has lied to me yet this game so I am feeling okay.

Coin flip time BABYYYYYYY 

So it’s a 4 person alliance with 2 people on the outside of that. Where do we go from here? You guess it! Flip a coin!

None of us had any like preference about who should go, so we use the pancake bot to flip a coin. It landed on Dan. Then Timmy pipes up and says he was wanting Ali, so we say ok 2 out of 3. The next 2 are Ali. Poor dude.

Seems pretty simple and easy. Almost too simple and easy.

Merge is going to be a struggle.

I hope we swap again soon mayb

slowly turning active again

Honestly the feedback of the challenge was amazing, the tribe thinks and idol will be played tonight so that will shock me honestly if it does, but idk what to think anymore tbh.

Power Rankings: ONE - MEGS (NC) Threat: 9 (+1) Trust: 9 (NC) Megs threat level increase this round because I got a little more insight into her plans moving forward. I can tell she’s still disclosing info from me, but I approached her by saying regardless I know our paths won’t perfectly align, but I know were good. She opened up about not wanting to work with Ali. She wants Nic out next and I know its because of his money status. I think megs is forgetting about her threat level again. With Nic gone she’s the only one with a good amount of money - Ari being second with $400. People don’t need to look at her more, but the power is getting to her head a bit. TWO - TAYLOR (+1) Threat: 7 (+1) I bumped myself up to second here because I think I finally have a good enough grasp on this tribe to say I deserve to be placed here. But with Adam going last round, it also has put me in easily the best social spot. The only person I haven’t met in this game is Dan. I’m starting to get a little more money, I have a stronger hold on my position, I have people ahead of me that are perceived bigger threats. THREE - BRANDI (-1) Threat: 6 (NC) Trust: 4 (-1) Alright Brandi lands at number three because of all the people left, she’s been the most consistent. She has a strong enough social game, she’s clearly recognizing people as threats and where her game lies within that. I knocked brandi’s trust down one because I found out she actually is good friends with Amos who played e10 - a game I help host. My rep in the endure community, not to brag, is known. I just landed a 1st place in e8 cast rankings which is public knowledge to anyone viewing. I feel like theres a slight chance Amos could have told brandi to watch out for me. I guess it could go the opposite way where he tells her no work with her, but I think its safe to assume the worst here. FOUR - JABARI (NC) Threat: 5 (NC) Trust: 8 (NC) I think Jabari did exactly what she needed to do this round, after her performance last round, she needed to fade back into the background. She’s present, she’s playing, and she’s intelligent, but she’s not on anyone’s radar. She lands at 4 solely because of the tribe dynamics, but at merge boy she’s easily one of the biggest UTR threats in my eyes. FIVE - JOSH (+2) Threat: 2 (NC) Trust: 3 (NC) Okay, I know youre probably thinking “wow josh just shot up too placements that’s an improvement!” And with that I have to tell you, no, it has nothing to do with josh and everything to do with what 6 and 7 have done to their games. Josh just… isn’t here? But the thing josh is doing right is he isn’t bothering anyone. He does his work, does what hes told, and signs off. A very yes man attitude, which is gaining favour in others eyes. I still think hes a wildcard, I have no idea what hes actually thinking which scares me in particular. SIX - EMMA (NC) Threat: 1 (NC) Trust: 3 (NC) Emma and josh had similar stories, except I think people are more fed up with Emma because she isn’t any help to the tribe. She’s got a lot going on with whatever else she’s doing, she doesn’t chat with people, has sat our of 2 challenges now, it’s just very below mediocre performance. She says she wants to be around more, then leaves me on read. Not much more I can do with that. SEVEN - NIC (-2) Threat: 6 (NC) Trust: 6 (NC) Nic finishes up this rounds power rankings for the sole reason that megs wants his head on a stick. He’s got a lot of money, hes performed well in challenges, and he’s becoming more and more on the radar. We have to remember here these are also POWER rankings, how much power or influence these people have on the tribe. Nic my friends, has none. And with Megs, #1 wanting him out, well hes pretty much a dead fish in the water. He’s brought up multiple times hes nervous about his position, yet fails to elaborate or try to include me in something. Hes done this at least 4 times now, I don’t have any mercy for him at this point.

Regardless of what happens at this ugly ass tribal, like I’m so proud of myself for surviving this long being swap fucked lmao

I really thought I was donezo lmao this game is heating up and it’s almost 10000% necessary for Chloe to go this round. I’m thinking it’s likely we merge at 10 and it’s gonna be so obvious that me Ali and Ari are a group in the sea of new Beeho.

I’m hoping I can play somewhat of an in the middle game with OG Pearl and my New Pearl friends. We’ll see. Going into merge having only missed one tribal council will honestly be a huge resume builder for me.

All that matters is that I’m proud of the game I’m playing. 

[survivorsunsetrodeo]

Ep 5 | My Ass Is Voluptuous And They Can Never Take That Away From Me - Adam

I keep going back and forth between wanting to take this game seriously or just having fun with it. I do wish I was having more fun though I forgot how stressful ORGs are. It’s the FIFTH ROUND and I’m still not in any alliance chats. Do these people hate me or what?

YAY! Dan and Adam didn't go home last night. That's nice.

I'm hoping that this is a sign that the game will be pretty dynamic and original tribal lines won't be a major factor in votes. Original Pearl kinda NEEDS it to be that way.

I can't remember if I said it in a previous confessional, but it would NOT be in my best interest to vote Jabari or Taylor out if new Beeho goes to tribal. Being in the overall minority, I need an "in" for the next swap or merge.

In order to NOT vote Jabari or Taylor out, I just need one other original Pearl to vote with us. I was hoping it was Emma but I'm not connecting with her as much as I wanted.  I had a call with Brandi and she originally wanted to forfeit the scavenger hunt challenge but changed her mind. I told her why we should work with original Beeho instead of against them and she agreed. I'm kind of worried about her long term since she called Dan and I as threats from very early. She said it in a positive way but I dont want her tell other people I'm someone to look out for. But I'd rather have her in my pocket than getting panicky and making rash decisions like throwing challenges. I'm going to work on making her feel like she has control in the game.

Speaking with Taylor, we might target Josh if we need to go to tribal. He's gotten nosy and is looking into season 3 Endure and we don't need a target on Taylor since she did well that season. He's a super nice guy but theres something about him that just annoys me. I can't explain it so I wouldnt be opposed to him leaving.

Nic is also an option. I made a sort of challenge threat ranking list and out of new Beeho, he's performed the worst, and I dont love how he and Josh are so quick to sit out of challenges. The more I get to know him the more I like him though. He's an interesting person.

Brandi mentioned that she is not bonding well with Emma when we were discussing working with Jabari and Taylor at the next vote.

So basically I'm willing to vote out anyone on New Beeho except Taylor or Jabari lol But goal #1 is to not lose.

I definitely think Taylor is the best position at this point in the game in terms of safety and influence because of the swap. I would love another swap so I can see fresh faces and widen my reach in the game as well.

I would love to work with Ari. They seem cool af.

I’m just gonna come out and say it. I fucking hate this tribe. You’re telling me that you were given 24 hours to submit a five coordinates and two of you couldn’t BOTHER to do it?

Miss Chloe, you were LITERALLY talking about your choices in the tribe chat and then just didn’t submit them to your host chat? Dumb.

Miss Ali, you forgot about this challenge too? We’re you at the Cheesecake Factory too long?

I truly cannot.

Now I can’t even fucking compete in the immunity challenge tomorrow and these flops are gonna..... FLOP. If my loser allies from OG Pearl would just throw the challenge and vote out someone from OG Beeho that would be lovely. But I’m sure mastermind Megs is already thinking she’s running shit over there too. It’s all just ugly 

This challenge took all of .5 seconds to do and 2 people on my tribe didn't do it? 2?!? Like what if it was an immunity challenge, we would have lost and have gone to tribal because of them! We tied meaning honestly we might have lost anyways but who knows because they could have found stuff we didn't and the other tribe had more opportunities to find stuff. But it's ridiculous, like Chloe was online and even participated in discussion about the challenge. Ali was offline all day and just last night he said that he would do well in this challenge to show he is around and failed. I swear if he fucks around tomorrow during the challenge his ass is going home.

I have never been more disappointed in a group of people in my life. Chloe and Timmy literally laughing while doing awful in this challenge is actually so fucking annoying. I should have never ever joined the call.

I. AM. SPIRALING.

I literally have zero words for all of this. My OTTN5 edgic is alive and well still. I just like don't fucking get how a group of people can be so utterly useless at challenges fdskljakfjas.

Ari is literally the only person on the tribe that seems to get me. I just really want to stay and play and I just feel like my overall turbulent spiral is going to get me in trouble. I know I need to pump the brakes and fucking breathe, but I literally want to call everyone out on their bullshit.

I tried bringing up pooling money with Adam to buy and idol, but of fucking course, he is like dodging the messages.

How do people play these games like they don't give a single fuck.

Somehow I was the one to bring my tribe to victory?? It feels good to be the hero of the tribe...

Also I've amassed quite the amount of money which means the possibility of buying an idol is becoming more and more realistic. It'll be good to have if I make merge because I'm starting to worry I'll become a target.

After 3 hours, we lost....fuck. I think I'm in a really good position though (unless I'm delusional, which is a possibility) but I am in a majority alliance and was just asked about the chance to have a different majority alliance. That is where things get tricky because the Pickle Pack includes myself, Ari, Chloe, and Jacob and then Dan proposed an alliance of myself, him, Adam, and Ari. Ari and I were talking and they don't really want to get rid of an OG Beeho, which at this point would mean Ali and only sees a downside of this second alliance. I think Ali is a loose cannon and honestly isn't contributing to the tribe as a whole as well as the challenges so he has no point in staying truly, but Ari sees him as a number. I know Ari is a close ally, but it also seems like Ari is everyone's close ally which is of great concern. They also just won $250 in this challenge alone meaning they have a nice amount of money. At the minimum they have $400 (and that is without checking the last reward) because of the $50 from the first and then the $100 from the coin catching challenge. At $400 you can afford an idol good until F7 so that is a factor I need to think about and I need to continue looking at the saloon to see if things go missing. Long term I can't keep Ari, and I think the people here are smart enough to see that which is good. For now though Ari trusts me so A+ for me. They want Adam to go, and Adam is an amazing game player so truly not the worst move but I also told Adam that I wouldn't snake him but I have to do what is best for my game and also the votes aren't revealed so if in any twist he comes back I could just easily like and be shooketh. Tomorrow we shall see what Chloe and Jacob are thinking so that'll be good to gain a different perspective. I just want to stay safe at the end of the day. Tomorrow is gonna be a long one.

just realized i also had to do this shit last season too LOL

I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned this in a previous confessional, but I figured I would just say it now again for the sake of getting enough content for this episode. Even though I feel relatively safe with Meagan and Brandy right now as well as Josh and Emma obviously, I’ve made it a point to keep my doors open when it comes to possibly working with jabari and taylor. I kind of decided to talk a little bit of game with Taylor for two reasons. The first reason being in case I ever decided to make a move against Megan and Brandy which is very unlikely but I guess a little bit possible, and the second reason being I wanted to get to Taylor and Jabari before Meagan and Brandy could get to them and make a move against me Josh or Emma. It’s kind of a strategy I would like to continue even at merge if I make it, because I really have no solid strategic connections with anyone except for Josh at this point. And I don’t wanna be stuck on one side of the game forever. I feel like I have yet to really shine in this game and I wanna make an impact and win.

This tribe is making me miserable due to repetitive small talk. How is it that I’ve been on a tribe the whole game with Brandi and Megs and we’re STILL doing small talk! Whatever we won the challenge and Nic is a beast. Hope we keep the streak goin!

Another thing is is that I feel like I have grown since my first season back. My first time around I got too comfortable and I decided to be messy for the sake of being messy and to make a move only for the sake of making a move. This season I feel like I’ve been a lot more cautious and I’ve been taking out everything I do a lot more. I do kind of feel stuck strategically but I’m hoping that’ll change at the merge. I feel like I’ve just been floating by.

Like on original pearl I was able to survive because I wasn’t the least active and because I volunteered for the hero challenge which made people feel bad for me. I’m able to survive on Beeho because we keep winning challenges. I haven’t really had to fight for my life strategically yet And it just feels kind of weird.

I’m also kind of worried that Dan or Adam will go home at this tribal, And if they do, it means pearl will officially be in the minority. That kind of scares me because I feel like a lot of the big threats of the season are on the Beeho side of things, like Ari and Jacob or even Ali and Chloe who seem to be pretty social.

I am possibly going home and I am terrified 

With the rest of the game going smoothly, I got to really know the players on my tribe, I was very exhausted after another challenge but I wanted to do my part in the upcoming immunity, thankfully I finally did What I was put on this earth to do. I do feel bad for my old tribemates but at this stage of the game Taylor and I need all the wins we can get. Today I was actually asked by megs for a core 4 + Nic and I'm totally down for that because then I can see the mechanics of this game and hopefully this tribe as well. The question still remains if the same can be said about our og tribe, if the current boot order is og beeho then I may have to cut my ties altogether and focus on whats best for me rather than whats best for the tribe.

Well, well, well...

What I thought was going to be one of the most boring and uneventful weeks yet has taken quite the turn.

I've discussed the topic of alliances with Megs before, mostly as a way to hint that I know she was in an alliance without me on OG Pearl and to make her feel bad. I don't think she ever got the hint, but anyway..

Today she messages me asking if I'm ready to talk about alliances again. I assumed she's going to bring up the idea of an OG Pearl on Beeho alliance with us, Brandi, Josh, and Emma, since it looks like Dan or Adam may go home on the other tribe.

She starts out by saying she feels closest with Brandi and I, and that she wants a 5 person alliance. I ask her who the other two would be, and to my surprise, she says she gets good vibes from Jabari and Taylor and wants to include them in an alliance without Josh and Emma. She thinks Pearl is going to be in the minority at merge and the best way to combat this is to jump ship and align with some Beehos.

Kinda weird since we could literally throw two challenges and secure Pearl a majority at merge.

Obviously Josh is my number 1 ally, so I'm not going to be loyal to an alliance without him in it. I also don't like the idea of aligning with Beeho because we have no idea what their original tribe dynamic was like. We don't know if there's any wiggle room for us in their group. Plus, there's so many threats on the Beeho side, I'd rather get them out as soon as possible rather than align with them.

Yalllllllll the ugliness continues to grow. So like Ali is saying to me he has my back and like vouched for me and shit and has the vote on Adam. But also won’t tell me who he vouched to? So idk if he’s just trying to push his agenda or if he’s lying to me.

I would love to see Ali or Jacob go this round and I want a me, Adam, Ari, and Timmy alliance to materialize. I feel like having two people from each starting tribe as a strong core going into merge is going to be huge. We might be able to divide and conquer in a way. Plus at merge I’ll hopefully still have megs, Brandi, and Emma. Although I wouldn’t be mad to see Megs go before merge.

This is a tricky vote because if we settle and vote out Adam... then I’m the next one to go for sure. But if I push too hard to save Adam, they might all vote for me. I need to talk to Ari because I trust them 1000000%. Adam is someone I need to talk to but I need to wait to disclose anything to him that Ali said to me for right now. 

ahhhhhhhhhh my game is CRUMBLING BEFORE MY EYES

this is bad bad. like legitimately Bad.... im so stressed out omg. talked to chloe this morning and she was like "yeah i wouldnt mind voting ali" and so basically it's up to me and jacob having a talk w the pickles to de-escalate it if at all possible. maybe not the best move for me to tell her about the hypothetical me/timmy/pearls alliance but i thought maybe she would be like oh timmy didnt tell me that thank you ari i'll do whatever you want. should have kept it lower-key instead of making it into A Decision that she could say yes or no on. oh well worth a shot. anyways basically if me and jacob can't convince them then i'm full-on screwed because either i let my number one ally go home leaving me with a bunch of people who i don't rly wanna trust (besides jacob) or i buy an idol for ali like i told him i would and then immediately get in hot water with basically everyone else cuz let's be real they'll know i helped him right away and then at best we have me jacob ali versus dan timmy chloe and that is just an ugliness i do NOT WANT RIGHT NOW

and ali is NOT HELPING apparently every single thing he's saying to dan is wrong bc dan comes to complain to me about it (he also vaguely told dan to "talk to ari" so now i gotta deal with that dkgkskgj), and he hasn't been keeping up his social game so these ppl have an excuse to get him, and he's probably gonna get messier as the day goes on.

so what am i doing about it? all i can do at this point, which is putting that cross-tribal alliance in ice water as best i can, rlly dunking it in there in every way possible, and trying to make dan and adam feel like they have to be against each other. if they team up and think they can have power, that's a problem, so maybe approaching it from the bottom is more effective than from the top? idk idk. if timmy doesn't hear anything more about this alliance then he's more inclined to be like yeah ok let's vote adam, and then the rest of them can follow. aside from that, i guess im just gonna try and run down the clock here?? and count on everybody's hesitancy to make bold moves as a benefit?? WE'RE TRYIN OK

jk we good actually lol

I had a lot of fun with the challenge last night even though I flopped and took an hour to do a 180 piece puzzle. I really enjoyed vibing with Timmy and Ari on the vc. It sucked majorly that we have to go back to tribal, even though I haven't really been to tribal lmao, I just dislike being back in this position again. Looking at this vote the easy choice would be Adam or Dan, but I kinda wanna vote Ali just because I feel as though he's been around signficantly less than Dan and Adam, but Ari seems very protective over Ali which I guess is something I have to watch out for in the future.

I called Ari earlier just to have a little chat and we discussed that there was an alliance between Ari, Timmy, Adam and Dan. It's so rude I wasn't included and definitely leaves me concerned about Timmy's thoughts going forward and whether he would really be with me long term but I guess I have to wait and see how this plays out. 

ugh....this round is so MESSY for no reason. idk theres just a lot happening and idk how to even explain it honestly. like i feel fine i guess mostly but i know adam and dan both said my name, trying to save themselves, and also said ali's name. but luckily i have an alliance with ari/ali who are targeting adam and we think timmy and chloe will do the same. its just so weird how it all happened bc like it seems like dan and adam are just rly trying to save themselves but then they turned on each other and it was so confusing. also timmy is so hard to read and idk how to feel about him like i almost considered targeting him this round but i think its still too early so ima just wait for that LMFAO. anyways ya,,, idk what else to say bc im confused and dont even know how to process everything that happened

Adam is on his way to being the worst player this game IMO. Like he has dug his own grave at this point and I think it’s only made people trust me more??? So thanks for that?

But to have the audacity to push Ali’s name to me Timmy and Jacob and THEN TURN AROUND AND TELL ALI WE WERE THE ONES TARGETING HIM.

The bafoonery.

Sometimes it’s just better to fucking chillllll.

I don't think I've ever seen Adam be this messy. Like this is fucking wild and I cannot. At least now I'm not snaking him, because I'm just going with the plan of the tribe (at least from what I have been told) and he is going around with like 8 different plans. Dan just told me that Adam told Ali about the group that Adam thinks is supposed to be voting for Ali so all the more reason to vote Adam I guess. I just really hope after all this mess that I am still here because I spent 3 hours doing that challenge and after Ari got out I had to do the brunt of the work. 

This game feels unplayable because of everything that’s been happening plz protect ur qtpoc poc and ur friends in general they could not feel safe atm

I have decided to officially create a trio alliance between Emma, Josh, and I. I really like both of them and see them both as really solid and loyal allies come merge. I wouldn’t want to see either of them go.

Honestly, at this point, I do feel confident in my ability to make merge even if we lose a few challenges. So my main priority for now is looking at what actions I can take to set myself up to be in a good position come merge.

Adam told me I am getting voted out, Sis are you crazy?

Power Rankings: ONE - MEGS (NC) Threat: 8 (-1) Trust: 9 (NC) No surprise Megs is at the top of the ranking again this round. Not only has she well positioned herself due to her 5-2 swap majority, but she also had a key part in making the alliance between her, brandi, Nic myself and Jabari. She’s covered at all angles, and deserves this top spot. I knockd her threat level down one as she’s spreading out her power by making this alliance, giving a lot more control to people like Nic, myself and Jabari who had none last round. It is a good move for her though, spread out the power, less eyes on her. TWO - BRANDI (NC) Threat: 6 (NC) Trust: 5 (+3) Brandi ranks at #2 because she was the other key hand in making the majority alliance. Her and megs collectively recognized the idea that their position may be compromised if they lose dan or Adam (as they were a part of their original alliance) and they need to make new friends here. By choosing Jabari and I, old beeho with presumed connections to that side, its in their best interest to work with us rather than against. Trust level goes up with brandi due to the alliance, I still dont trust her that much. She’s very much a do what’s in her best interest only kind of player. THREE - TAYLOR (+2) Threat: 6 (+2) My positioning and threat level increased, im starting to gain some momentum on this tribe. Coming from a 5-2 minority to somehow being in a majority alliance is a huggeee plus for my game because not only am I making new relationships here, but I hope to still have my old ones over there. I’m probably the person best positioned in the entire game in terms of options, I like to think I have good relationships back on old beeho, im positioned well on new beeho. FOUR - JABARI (+3) Threat: 5 (+2) Trust: 8 (NC) Jabari made a lot of ground work this round, and it shows. Brandi has nothing but great things to say about her, she was included in the 5 majority due to the relationships she’s made, I think she rightfully earns the 4th spot. Her threat level increases as she killed this round, socially, strategically, and in the challenge. All in all an amazing round for her, and I see an upwards trajectory. I see her as the dark horse right now, someone I need to keep my eye on. FIVE - NIC (NC) Threat: 6 (+3) Trust: 6 (NC) My feelings on Nic vary day to day. I was getting very annoyed with him opening up about his terrible position on the OG tribe and then not doing anything about it, then he kept saying stupid shit about why he cant play the challenge. I was extremely frustrated with him. However he did kill the immunity challenge, we wouldn’t have won with out him. The girls wanted to included him in the majority which was fine, the more numbers the better. Nic’s threat level increases due to his insane performance in the challenge. SIX - EMMA (-3) Threat: 2 (-2) Trust: 5 (NC) Emma… this was not her round. She says she has a lot going on with her other game, and I hope her mental health is okay, but I have a really big issue with people that choose to play multiple games at once, and then complain about not being able to handle it. Just play one, don’t put yourself through the stress. She lacked socially, didn’t even comment when we were deciding who would play in immunity, and has now found herself left out of a 5 majority. Terrible round on her part and I can’t see her bouncing back, people aren’t happy with her. SEVEN - JOSH (-1) Threat: 2 (-1) Trust: 3 (NC) Josh has found himself at the bottom of our tribe, unfortunately for him people just don’t really stand up for him when others voice their concerns. Hes kind of faded into the background, im sure the timezone isn’t helping. If we were to go to tribal tonight I think its likely we see a josh boot, but it could be 50/50 between him and Emma. The thing about josh is if we talked more, I could see us actually getting our game son the same track. But hes a wildcard, I have no idea where hes at which makes him more dangerous than Emma - who we know is just busy in another game.

[survivorsunsetrodeo]

Rites of Passage & Jury Roundtable