#Also I don't think the left is 4th century. Lmao

[bijoumikhawal]

I get a specific type of Egyptian fashion recommendations on pinterest which are untrustworthy but funny in a slightly depressing way

For the unfamilar "Egyptian history defender" is basically a dogwhistle as far as I'm concerned, whoever made this shit is 95% likely to be racist and freakishly preoccupied with hating Black Africans

Youre an Egypt defender and you chose photos of two women in what I'd identify as Moroccan dress? (I could just be unfamiliar but these designs look VERY Moroccan and I don't know of Egyptian designers making soutached caftans like these)

Youre a history defender and you don't know the second woman here isn't wearing a dress with a caftan on top? She's wearing a tunic with wide clavi (patterned stripes)- it's one garment and has no resemblance to the modern image used as comparison

[cutestbitches]

Hey! I'm here to submit some characters!

I think both of the von Karmas from Ace Attorney are pretty spiteful bitches. Spoilers and a bunch of sleep-deprived infodumping ahead!!

First off, there's this asshole.

Manfred von Karma was a prosecutor who prided himself on his perfect win record. He had a pattern of hiding evidence, using fear and manipulation to get what he wanted, and just generally being a bitch in court so that he could win cases.

However, in one case, it caught up to him. I don't know the full details since I haven't gotten that far into the Ace Attorney franchise, but he ended up getting a penalty in court because Gregory Edgeworth, a defense attorney, exposed his tactics for being Kinda Illegal.

Manfred still won the case! But he got One (1) Penalty, something that had never happened before in his career, and that set him the fuck off.

Long story short, he ended up killing Gregory Edgeworth, adopting Gregory's son Miles, manipulating Miles into thinking he was his father's real killer, changing Miles' entire worldview and making him into a shell of his former self, and then trying to get Miles arrested 15 years later!

All because some guy called him out on his bullshit! Seems pretty spiteful to me.

...And then, we've got Manfred's daughter, Franziska von Karma.

I love Franziska dearly, but I'll be the first to say that she's also a Spiteful Bitch. She's got a hell of a lot of generational trauma, and has the same incessant need as her father to be the best at everything.

Remember how I said that Manfred adopted another kid, Miles? Well, Franziska had always held great resentment towards Miles, believing that he was always leaving her in the dust and going on to do better things without her. They had a very, very deep rivalry.

Franziska also had a lot of pressure put on her from a very young age because of her father's reputation as a "perfect prosecutor", and she always felt the need to live up to that reputation.

Well, around 2016-2017 in the game's timeline, Both Miles and Manfred were beaten in court by defense attorney Phoenix Wright (Hey! He's the main character!), and Manfred was subsequently arrested and sentenced to death.

When Franziska heard that both her brother and father had lost to Phoenix, she wanted to face off against him in court and win a case against him, so that she could be better than her father and not be left behind by her brother anymore.

Yeah, this game is really dramatic.

So, there's my essay! I hope you consider my submissions.

-Poggay, or Maimmanfredvonkarma

P.S. when I was in liek 4th grade, my teacher would make the class do these division worksheets. when we were done, he would assign us all numbers to go along with the number of problems on the worksheet, and then have us stand up and go in numerological order, reciting the division problem that corresponded with our number.

if someone got the problem wrong, didn't recite it fully, didn't stand up, stuttered, spoke too slowly, or made any kind of mistake, our teacher would chastise the kid and make the entire class start from the very beginning. we would often have these weird division problem recital sessions bleed into our lunch and recess time.

one day, i ended up fucking up this one big streak we had going by getting the problem wrong, and it fucked me up lmao. i went into the school bathroom to cry for, like, an hour.

so yea. that's my 4th grade villain origin story. i thought it'd be kinda funny to include it in a submission about two spiteful perfectionists.

I can finally show the world the 4th grade villian origin story of the century.

Also Franziska von Karma is in the bracket.

(This could also count as Manfred von Karma propaganda sorta.)