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#BushLeagueHistory
bushleaguefpl-blog · 6 years
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Bush League: A History
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Here be the definitive history collection from our fabled Bush League, 2015 to now... Click to read...
2015/16 SEASON
The Debut season saw only 8 managers take the plunge into the Bush League, featuring the Bush OGs; Harrison Kennedy, Rowan Flanagan, Brody Felgate, Reid Kennedy, Madde Bowshire, Blake Hands, Guy Ethell and Logan McIndoe. The League was fiery, full of banter as the close binds of friendship were tested in the early years. Most notable was the introduction of famous Bush Meme Steve “Felgate” Harvey. The story began as Brody started the season low, very low, being in the bottom 3 for the first 12 weeks of the league. After this, a stream of wins and ego swept through the league as Felgate stormed up the table, sweeping aside key contenders on his road to glory. The Dons and Doumbiaaaaa #1 were argurably the best teams throughout the season, biding their time for the introduction of Harvey, keeping their place in the top 4 for nearly the whole season. This was in stark opposition to Sneed’s feed and seed the first, who had a stranglehold on the bottom, finishing as wooden spoon with more than 10 fixtures to go in the season. As the final whistle of the season drew near and the fixture list ended, Felgate sat atop the draw...
What came next was the onslaught. The claims of “Ranieri of the Bush League”, “The ultimate underdog story” and “The Special One” were shown throughout the bush. These posts were accompanied with imagery, sourced via snapchat:
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What followed would go down in history. Steve Harvey was born. A finals series emerged that Bush League Co-Comissioner Felgate was not ready for. He had been pushed aside. He had not been important and had not won. He was a minor premier and nothing more.
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Felgate was swept aside in the first round of the finals by a secret Wild Card dropped by ultimate Troll and resident sneaky boi Judas manager Reid Kennedy who went on to crush Felgate but then lose out in the final game.  The Winner of the first year was Rowan “Flash Flanno” Flanagan, who dominated for a large majority of the first season, even through form droughts, to maintain a seat in the Bush Hall of fame with a crushing victory of Reid in the final. 
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2016/17 SEASON
The 16/17 season saw the Bush DOUBLE in size. 8 new teams joined the flames after hearing of the incredible drama of the first season. It was a huge welcome to managers Alex “Netdix” Horne, Max “Myth Angler” Maggotty, David “Supports ManUre but no Irish Teams” O’Carroll, Kirby “2cool4facebook” Lloyd, George “Papa <3″ Chittleborough and Brock “Are You Not Entertained?” Lamont. These new eager managers joined the pile in the hopes of replicating Rowan “the legal age is 13 right?” Flanagan’s heroics from the first season. 
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Right from the get go manager Brock Lamont saw Ws in his column in the table and this would set the tone for a fantastic debut season from the former Tally Tigers vet. Brought in by OG Guy “Solid Wood” Ethell, Guysy surely regretted his decision as Lamont went on to school the league on his way towards the finals for what would become another incredible finish to the finals series. Before jumping that far ahead however, the drama of the 16/17 season started fully during GW2 which saw the move that changed the generation of House Kennedy forever. A “Gentleman’s Agreement” (See George Chittleborough for definition) was reached between tight-knit brothers Reid and Harrison Kennedy where they would both take massive negative points hits to change their teams in what would be a minus points amnesty; a move which made perfect sense. However, after consulting another certain manager about whether the deal was good, Reid decided to tell Harrison he would agree to replicate the same amount of transfers....before not making a single negative transfer that week. Harry was livid. He felt betrayed. By his blood, his very own brother. 
Here is an excerpt from the fateful incident:
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From there the relationship devolved and turned into a slandering match which continues as we move into our fourth season. 
Another love-hate relationship that spawned between the managers of the bush was the introduction of the triple-dicked-10 inch-weapon that was IAN. Ibrahimovic ($10m), Aguero ($11.5m) and Negredo ($6.5) formed the trident that spelt death for more than half the league during the 2nd bush season. From the GW statistics we could find (intermittent rounds from 3-17) saw an average point differential of 28 points per week for IAN users. Incredible considering that is divided between three players. We surely miss this as Ibra is gone, Aguero is made of glass and Negredo disappeared down the middlesborough relegation hole :’(. Such a trident hasn’t existed since and we surely miss it. Except for Sneed’s. He was fucked by the trident countless times in one of the worst L records ever seen. 
A key moment to note from 16/17 was the love affair that began in the bush. We are great supporters of the LGBTQILMNOP movement and all of our brother’s, sisters and she-males are supported in their right to sexual liberation (Though used humorously, we do support the rainbow). In the Bush we saw a beautiful one-sided homosexual relationship between current champion Rowan Flanagan and Marcus Rashford (who I swear was also underage at the start of this romance....notice a trend). Rowan took to the bush to proclaim his sexual love for the young young young striker and even ended up changing his team name as an ultimate act of love. What a man.
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The bush descended into mediocrity after Christmas as most managers lost their way AND THEIR PASSWORDS (looking at you again Flanagan), forgetting to change each week, sending the bush into it’s darkest tailspin. One manager however was diligent. Brock Lamont rose to glory, smashing Reid Kennedy (Two times top 4 manager) to bring home the bacon in what was a topsy turvy second season. 
Also Max joined this year; may the banter R.I.P. 
2017/18 SEASONO (WE <3 CONTE)
“Bush 3: the case of the missing Christmas Weekly” was the Bush’s biggest season to date. Consistent growth saw another 8 managers joined to create a 24 man league with too much sausage to handle. Little did the Bush know at the time, that these debutants would be such a spicy addition to form. Ben “The Wiz” Petersen, Tim ‘has literally one photo’ Sheehan, Jerome ‘The White Wolf’ Albert, Mitchell “Wombatshuyai” Keen, Chris “Vin Diesel” Keen, Chris “Chrenlord” Kennedy.
Two of these debutants went on to the Semi finals and had stellar seasons to show that they were massive contenders in the future. The heartbreak kid Mitch Keen and Bendalf the Grey Petersen have proved worthy competitors and have assured the bush that mediocrity is not an option. NOT UP IN HERE! 
17/18 also saw the rise of the MOTM photoshops, something that the bush now holds dear and will continue from here on in. 
We would be remiss if we did not first acknowledge the Bush Weekly. 16/17 actually saw the largest amount of content and words written for the bush weekly out of all the three seasons that have occurred. However, a disintegrated clavicle, a painkiller addiction and a busy christmas period saw the fade of the Weekly Bush read and the faith of the following. The Bush entered the darkest timeline. As banter disappeared and all posts and comments followed the most generic meme format, managers began only referencing the missing weeklies rather than presenting any decent banter into the social space. 
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It was a dark season for all as Thanos arose out of the darkness and dragged the league with him...forcing it into the flames. Logan “Champ Champ” McIndoe was the man to beat. He set records of 110+ point rounds, maintained win-streaks and deleted Max from his facebook friends (wise) once and for all. He smashed the league week in and week out and left many other OGs and new young guns licking their wounds in a collision course where the Bush succumbed to other million timelines...Where Thanos would rule all. “Dread it. Slip from it. Destiny still arrives”
Blake “Slippy B” Hands has always maintained that Steven Gerrard was a hero. A mentor. An inspiration. And this season was the culmination of his quest to become just like one of his heroes. Blake slipped. He was at the tippy top of finals contenders in the table from Christmas onward and stormed into the finals. However, Thanos McIndoe, like Demba Ba is a destroyer of worlds, sending Slippy B into a spiral and stealing the crown from his clutches. 
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Kirby Lloyd was also a record breaker and the new mythological creature (#TheBlitz) from the Bush. He set a new win record early on in the season and was the only manager attempting to thwart Thanos on his quest for domination. He then however, used his slick facebook DPs to rope himself a girlfriend.
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He went on a losing streak to almost the same extent as his win streak before deleting facebook, deserting the bush and his brothers to focus on his new love life. 
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Another welcome addition to the Bush was Aaron Mooy who took a place in 90% of the Bush League’s teams. He was a welcome addition, bringing in a string of 4 and 6 point games to the delight of many managers. However, as Huddersfield slipped and Mooy left on Australia duty, managers began subbing him out in a great showing of poor Australianism. Such shit showings of patriotism led to poor karma for managers that subbed him out. Harrison Kennedy and Brody Felgate felt the full force of this. Both subbing him out in the same week and starting a streak of shit form which saw them keep middle table mediocrity for the rest of the season. 
(See this: https://www.facebook.com/harrison.kennedy.5/videos/10214832910160027/?t=0)
Massive congratulations to Madde “Black Doctor” Bowshire after finally giving up his beloved wooden spoon this season and giving it to Guy “I am Guy” Ethell. Guy, well we just don’t know what happened in Bush 3 though we are glad he stuck around despite the few games he won all year.
As stated, the league fell the way of Thanos and Logan McIndoe reigned supreme; wrapping up the league in fantastic fashion. He claimed the minor premiership from Blake Hands and won the playoffs in true CHAMP CHAMP fashion. 
WHAT’S NEXT?
This year. 4 new teams. 28 players. Bush Website. Bush Social media. BUSH WILL TAKE OVER YOUR LIFE. The weekly will no longer exist to give way to a new format. The Bush will become something entirely different and evolve. Strap yourself in for what is set to be a cracking year. Choose some fucking decent team names (Max, change it or we’ll call you the Myths in all Bush Media) and lets get on with it...
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