#Catsup is baby I don’t make the rules

[decaf-bean]

@capnhanbers been thinking about Catsup lately and actually trying to figure out markings/coat type and I’m genuinely so conflicted.

[d-lewis-avengerwrangler]

Darcy’s Meatloaf Sliders

 It’s been said that there are two different types of people - those that like meatloaf, and those that don’t. I’m a meatloaf lover, and after trying this recipe, you will be, too. The original “Mini Meatloaf” recipe can be found HERE, but, as usual, I Darcyfied this thing to heck so get ready for it. Also, since I am so very charmingly American, I use American measurements. Google can help ya convert stuff. This recipe makes about 8 meatloaf patties - 4 per 9x13 pan. So you’ll either need two pans, or your patties are gonna have to take turns. ALSO BE AWARE THAT THE BEST WAY TO MAKE PATTIES IS BY STICKING YOUR BARE HANDS INTO RAW MEAT AND EGG AND MIXING THAT SHIT TOGETHER BEFORE SHAPING THE MIXTURE BY HAND (unless you’ve got a Burger Press) SO MAKE SURE YOUR HANDS ARE CLEAN, AIGHT? Aight, cool. Moving on. -----------------------

THINGS YOU NEED IN ORDER TO MAKE THE MEATLOAF:

~ 1 Egg ~ 3/4 Cup of Milk (I’ve used both 2% and Fat Free. Not sure how lactose free milk would work, but if any of you guys try it, lemme know how it works out) ~ 1 heaping Cup of Shredded Cheddar or Coby Jack Cheese (the cheese helps bind the patties so they don’t fall apart into Meatloaf Crumbles.) ~ 1/2 Cup Quick Oats (THIS DOES NOT MEAN AN ENVELOPE OF QUAKER OATS INSTANT OATMEAL. I’m talkin’ about the stuff that comes in the big cardboard tube/barrel thing.) NOTE: crushed saltine/oyster crackers can be used too. ~ up to 1 Teaspoon of Salt ~ 1 lb of raw Ground Beef 

------------------------------- ~ GET THOSE DIRTY POTS AND SHIT YOU’RE HIDING IN YOUR OVEN OUTTA YOUR OVEN YOU HORRIFIC SLOB. ~ Preheat your oven to 350* Fahrenheit. ~ Grease your 9x13 pan(s). Again, the ratio of Patty to Pan is 4-1. That’s Four Patties in One Pan. And that’s terrible ~ Mix everything BUT THE MEAT together in a big bowl. Make sure that there aren’t any bits of eggshell in there because that shit’s gross.

~ Add the meat and get your hands in there. Squish everything around until it’s mixed thoroughly. Yes, with your hands. No, you cannot use a blender. ~ Form the Patties (here’s a how-to for the poor uninitiated souls who never played with Play-Doh as children) ~ Place those Patties in the Pans ~ Stick the Pans in your oven for about 25 minutes _____________________ Now, you may be asking, “Hey Darcy, what do I do while my meat is loafin’ around in the oven?” YOU MAKE THE SAUCE, OF COURSE! ______________________

Darcy’s Meatloaf Sauce

~ Brown Sugar ~ Barbecue Sauce (I use Sweet Baby Ray’s) ~ Ketchup/Catsup (they’re the exact same thing but I wanted to make sure everyone felt included) ~ a couple drops of Worcestershire Sauce  ~ lil’ bit of Pickle Juice Notice how I didn’t give you measurements for this shit? That’s because I just pour stuff into my (small) saucepan and keep tasting it until it’s acceptable. Some people like to add Mustard to it, but I ain’t about that life. General rule of thumb (for me) is 1/3 Sugar, 1/3 Barbecue Sauce and 1/3 Ketchup with a chaser of... Let’s say a 1/2 teaspoon Worcestershire and 3 teaspoons of pickle juice. But y’all should do your own thing; as an old friend of mine always said, “Take chances, make mistakes, and get messy!” Meatloaf Slider Sauce is a personal thing, Fam. !! Make sure you take the pot off the burner when the sauce starts to bubble around the edges of the pot or you will ruin the sauce !! ------------------------- What to do when your timer goes off: ~Turn off the timer. Duh. ~Take the pan(s) out. Also Duh. ~ If the patties are cooked all the way through, Turn off your Oven. If not, stick ‘em back in the oven for another 5 minutes. Repeat as necessary. ~ If you’ve got a lot of grease in the pans, get rid of it by pouring it out into a cup or anything that IS NOT YOUR SINK OR TOILET, BECAUSE YOU WILL RUIN YOUR PIPES WITH THAT SHIT (You can transfer all of the patties to a single pan now if you want)  ~ Sprinkle Shredded Cheese on the patties. If you’re into that, that is. I am. I’m all about cheese. ~ Spoon your sauce over the patties.  You control how much sauce goes on these things - I use half of it at this stage and save the other half for serving, but y’all can do whatever you want. ~ Stick the pan back in the oven so the cheese can melt/sauce can glaze the patties while you complete the next step, which is... BUN PREP TIME! It’s like making a grilled cheese, only without the cheese. Or sandwich. ...It’s like making grilled bread. ~Take out yo’ Buns (or sandwich rolls, or Hawaiian Rolls - whatever you’re making these sliders on) ~ Slather the insides with butter OR mayonnaise (I use mayo because it makes the bread crispier) ~ Stick the carbohydrate of your choosing SPREAD SIDE DOWN in a hot frying pan and let it crisp up. Shouldn’t take more than 5 minutes. ~ Retrieve Patty. Place on Bun. Add more sauce if you want.

~ OM NOM NOM