#FromTopNotesToBottomAnnotations

[not-glorfindel-stop-asking]

Ai, Lindir! I see your education in the matters of intercourse is indeed rather lacking.

While I am aware of your delicate nerves, ignorance is a plight and has not served anyone well, and so, let me explain in plain terms, altrough I will spare you the diagrams.

If you'd rather somebody more familiar explained it to you go to ask Lord Elrond, he is always happy to enlighten people, but if you do not want to, then please, allow me to explain. I assume you do know and were informed how intercourse between a ner and a nis works, and I will try to work with this basic understanding.

Surely, you probably are familiar with the much disputed Laws and Customs, that do not truly reflect the state of the Eldar as a whole.

This is something quite outside of the most strict LaCE readings.

Bottom and top refer to preferred sexual positions during intercourse between two neri. As you probably know, a ner does not have a vulva. So how do two neri manage to have sex? The answer is quite simple - the anus.

It works quite the same way as between a ner and a nis, but do imagine that the ner on top (the one giving, let's call it) is indeed the top and the ner on the bottom, whose anus is used, is the bottom.

The bottom, because the ner is on the bottom and is being fucked in the bottom.

One could say it's a calling, but truly, it's a matter of personal preference.

To summarise in plain terms - a bottom is a ner, who is sexually interested in other neri, and who specifially during the act enjoys taking the member of the other ner into his anus.

If you have not fainted yet, dear Lindir, let me assure you, the term "twink" is not a derogatory one, at least not in the mouths of most people. I might mean that somebody would enjoy your attentions, but far from me to assume things about romance, since I do not understand it.

Sincerly hoping you did not die of mortification,

Narë of Imladris.

PS. Eredin, if you are reading this because Lindir fainted, do not let him check the book Thellind Îr from the library, even if he asks, his heart may not survive it.

Ah… it appears Lindir has fainted.

Hello, this is—uh—Eredin. Yes. Lindir is currently… indisposed.

Upon reading your detailed explanation, he gasped (quite theatrically, as is his custom), declared “Valar preserve me!” and promptly swooned onto the nearest chaise lounge. I assure you, I tried to catch him. I did not succeed. His robes are very slippery.

Now, here I am, redder than the autumn leaves in Lórien, trying to figure out how to respond. I—um—well, thank you for the thorough lesson? Your commitment to enlightenment is admirable, truly. I must say, you possess a remarkable talent for rendering both elves and scribes alike utterly speechless.

However, I must express my grave concern regarding the mention of Thellind Îr. Lindir did regain consciousness briefly (after I brought him some tea), only to whisper ominously:

“Fetch me the book.”

I refused, of course. I may be soft-spoken, but I do possess survival instincts.

He’s still eyeing me with suspicion, though, so I fear it’s only a matter of time before he devises some dramatic plot to sneak into the library.

Lindir, even in his fragile state, wishes me to convey that he remains both confused and deeply offended that this entire discussion somehow still circles back to Glorfindel's shoulders. He also requested I write:

"I am not a twink. I am a complex individual. With layers. Like an onion. Or perhaps a particularly expensive cake."

(He then fainted again. I think the cake metaphor was too much.)

Now—ahem—if I may, purely for academic purposes (and certainly not out of personal curiosity, no, not at all), I would like to pose a question:

"If one—hypothetically speaking, of course—wished to learn more about these matters, where might one begin? Not that I am inquiring for myself, no. Certainly not. I am merely… broadening my horizons. Expanding the mind, as it were. A scribe must be informed on all topics, after all! I—I do not blush at knowledge, no. My face is always this warm. Perfectly normal."

…Unless there is an easier method of understanding that does not involve diagrams. Or fainting. Or Glorfindel's shoulders.

Thank you for your… insight. Lindir and I shall recover in time. Probably.

Warm regards (and lingering embarrassment), Eredin (Reluctant Scribe, Accidental Receiver of Too Much Knowledge)