#Frovax

[msmoonicorn]

Simon didn't say...

omg, you guys... OK. So. I've started playing D&D regularly, right? Probably haven't updated you on that...because..I'm the worst.

Anyway!

So, I've been playing with decent regularity since February. Every Tuesday, I'm at a local Magic Arena that also hosts tabletop gaming nights. They ask you which game you want to play and tell you who's meeting at what times/days for that game. So if you want D&D 5e, this is when they play. If you want Pathfinder, this is when they play, etc, etc. It's a $5 charge every time you show up to game, and $1 goes to the DM and the rest goes into a party fund. That way if we want to do something special with party funds, we can!

My DM's an awesome guy, and we were playing his homebrew, but then... Saltmarsh came out. And we were all really into the idea of doing Saltmarsh. SO. We used party funds to buy Saltmarsh, and at a point when we were kind of lulling in our regular campaign, the DM was like, "Hey, let's do Saltmarsh". We all made characters for Saltmarsh, and it's been a ride.

Tonight, I'm writing, because zomg the stress.

So, here's the roster, ok?

Zach - 42. A Warforged monk with no memory of his past before he arrived with us at Saltmarsh. We call him Captain Salty Seafist, because he spent a lot of his free time working the docks and has a bit of a sea-dog accent(?) now. He was the captain of our first ship, but we now have two ships so... I guess he's the admiral.

Addy - Fey. A fey. She's.... she's just a fey. They homebrewed her a race to play and she has a bunch of abilities, but nothing for combat...except she can summon creatures that help her by fighting. Other than that, she's all healing, utilities, and reaction.

BP - Frovax. Dragonborn warlock, hexblade. I don't know this guy's name.. Still. He's been playing with us for a few weeks. But I still can't remember his name. His wife used to play with us...

Wifu - Kvisa. Barbarian woman. Bloodythirsty ditz. Really intent on killing Lizardfolk because they whiped out her tribe and she's the last of them. She was playing with us regularly, but then classes started up, and now her Barbarian girl is just...gone. Whatever. She was going to be a problem because she wanted to kill all the Lizardfolk. It's probably better this way.

Bear - Fresca Goosberry, the Inquisitor of Kelemvor...really he's a deluded warlock that thinks he's a cleric. He has a cult now, because he's been proselytizing, and the converted become his cultists. Three of those cultists actually survived our hydra fight, though, and they have class stats now :)

New Guy - a tiefling ranger... he's so new, we literally met him today. He has no name for his character, but his big-play seems to be that he wants to cover himself in some form of alcohol and light himself on fire since he's fire resistant... I've tried to explain that resistance doesn't equal immunity, but whatever. Rule of cool I guess.

Me - Simon. Half Drow bard, college of whispers. Bit of a man-whore, but he's into that free love thing. Usually sends letters with extra gold back to his dads. Yes. Dads. More on that later (maybe). I've described him as having a leather vest over a poofy white shirt and really tight pants... rocking that David Bowie vibe from the Labyrinth (if you know what I mean [you know what I mean]). He got a long oil-skin green coat with lots of pockets from one of the adventurers. One of my favorite lines thus far...

  So we meet this guy right? He says if he's staying with us he'd like a weapon to defend himself. 42, the warforged, detaches his pinkie and gives it to him since every part of his body is a weapon. The guys looks at the pinkie and asks what he's supposed to do with that, and Simon says, "Well... I've done a whole lot more with a whole lot less ;)"

So, I'm Simon, right? He hasn't necessarily fit in well with the group, but he hasn't rocked the boat (lol).....I mean, he's been neutral enough to go along for the ride. But joy of joys...tonight, we transitioned from Murder Hobos(TM) to actual negotiators. Simon really likes having friends on all sides, so that was definitely more his speed. Don't get me wrong, he enjoyed straddling a ballista and bullseyeing a Hyrdra with 40+ damage, but this is the sort of group that usually wants to attack everything before finding out what's going on. Anyway. Tonight, we talked to the Lizardfolk. Right away, our swamp druid, Bog, tries to just fight them outright. The new guy, a teifling ranger who hasn't even decided on his name yet, also was in to fight. But Frovax our Dragonborn Warlock stepped up and talked everyone down with a mixture of common and draconic and his high-ass charisma. While we were being escorted by the soldiers to a holding area, hatchlings came up and clung to Simon, and he gave them piggyback rides and played with them. It was great. Finally, the Queen shows up(we later learned that she's Queen Othokent), and we convince her that we'er here from Saltmarsh, because they're worried that the Lizardfolk building up weapons means they're about to attack. Simon mentioned that he heard that they're having problems with the Sahuagin. She got suspicious, but we managed to convince her that we boarded a ship that was full of smugglers and they mentioned the sahuagin. Bog even added to it by saying he killed the men on the ship for what they did to the Lizardfolk, pulling out an arm and returning it to the tribe. As a druid of the swamp, his main concern is with the swamp. Something he said in Druidic. This struck a chord with..I think he was like a wiseman or shaman or something, but he functions like a druid enough to understand it... I think his name was Sauriv. So, we were allowed to stay with the Lizardfolk in their lair for the night to prove ourselves. So, Fresca (a warlock who thinks he's a cleric) is trying to proselytize...but he doesn't speak the language, so no one understands him even if he is captivating with his high charisma. The Ranger and Frovax brought some of the soldiers to our ship to supply them with weapons. Bog bunkered down with Sauriv (Wiseman?), and taught some of their people the ways of a swamp druid. And Simon found the ladies that were taking care of the hatchlings and made himself useful as a baby sitter. He has this pipe that he got; it's called a pipe of remembrance. When he uses it, he can make smoke images of his greatest deeds, right? So between his story-telling, performing, and the pipe (showing off the hydra fight), he had the kids (about 18 of them) captivated. The following day, the Queen asked us if we would consider doing something for the tribe. She said a crocodile named Thousand Teeth had been behaving aggressively lately. He's killed many lizardfolk that tried to patrol near his home. If we could find a way to deal with him, she would be grateful. So. We set out. We kill two wandering ogres on our way. I think they were lost, but it's probably a random encounter or whatever. Anyway, we get to Thousand Teeth's lair, and we're set up by two giant constrictor snakes. Simon and Frovax were grappled by the snakes. Simon... wriggled free, losing his pants in the process (still not sure how that happened, but whatevs). The crocodile attacks, first Ranger and then Simon. Fresca gets some distance between them and him, because he works best at range. Then Simon gets attacked again by one of the snakes and falls unconscious....and then is dragged into the water by the snake. Which attacks him, trying to eat him...and he fails 2 death saves.

ಠ_ಠ

Luckily I rolled a 19 for his initial death save, and it kept him from dying outright. The guys finally killed the snake, and Bog cast Lesser Restoration on the mad crocodile, who calmed down. Of course, he also healed Simon, and he had a minimum of 11 HP. He also didn't get poisoned from being in the swamp water because he passed his con save. Bog spoke with Thousand Teeth, determined that he had rabies (convenient), and made peace between him and the lizardfolk.

So, that's all handled, but man! The stress was real. I was about to be very very sad. I mean, maybe these guys are like, "Meh, just make new characters" or whatever, but I don't play characters that I don't like. And I like my blue boy.

But yeah. TLDR: that's the story of how we become ambassadors to the Lizardfolk and rescued an ancient crocodile.