#Gonna tag Dena again because she likes my stuff

[asexual-alistair-blog]

Untitled Thedas Peeps in Modern World

Quinn scanned the crowd from the balcony above the stage. Her three brothers, who had formed a Beastie Boys cover group, were on said stage, performing. She felt an immense wave of loneliness wash over her as she saw that everyone in the crowd at least had someone. Alec had disappeared a year ago and she still had no idea how to function without her best friend.

The crowd cheered as her brothers started up “Sabotage,” but the cheers quickly turned to screams as a bright green light suddenly appeared and people fell out of it. Quinn was down the stairs in a flash, the gun she carried out. Her FBI training took over and she quickly told people stay back and get to safe cover. She heard her brothers helping people closer to the stage to safety as she inched closer to the figures on the ground under the light. Suddenly, the light disappeared with a pop, and she pointed her gun at the nearest figure.. “Hands in the air where I can see them!” She ordered, her tone leaving no room for questions. The four figures threw their hands in the air as they slowly sat up.

“Quinn, is that you?” She heard Alec’s voice, causing her to jolt the gun towards the figure who spoke. “Whoa, please put the gun down, it’s me, Alec!” Quinn gave a laugh.

“Hah! Alec is dead, nice try.” She sneered. “And he wouldn’t be caught dead wearing whatever the fuck you’re calling clothing.”

“Ouch.” A smooth voice came from another figure. “Alec, I like your clothing.”

“You picked it out, Sparkler, of course you would,” the shortest of the four figures chuckled. “What is a gun, and should I be worried that she has one?”

“It’s a weapon, and yes you should. Quinn was never a very good shot.”

“Quinn can you interrogate them in the back?” Her brother Mike appeared next to her before she could reply. “We still have to get these people to safety and lock down the hall. Don’t worry, we’ll get the rest of security to go through everything. Hey Alec, you look extra gay today. Nice job man.”

“I’ll need some help getting four people to the back. But yeah I can, just make sure you play some loud ass music during clean up. Drown out their lies.” Quinn smirked.

“Hey!” The short one said. “I don’t know about Sparkler and Domino over there but Curly and I do not lie.”

“Varric, you’re a self-proclaimed liar don’t even start.” Alec glared as Quinn’s security team manhandled them into the back room. “Quinn, I can explain…”

“There will be no explaining. Ya’ll fell out of a stupid fucking hole in the sky. I don’t want to know about that shit.” Quinn shook her head in a sharp motion.

“She’s eloquent. I like her.” the short guy named Varric laughed, “Good choice in friends, Domino.”

“Pat them down. If they resist, full cavity searches. You have the certification for that yeah?” The team of guards nodded. “Good.”

“That’s a little vindictive, Quinn.” Alec frowned. Quinn got into his face.

“You’ll deal with it because it’s protocol. I don’t know if you’re Alec or some hella good impostor, but I’m not risking all those people out there just because someone doesn’t want a pat down.”

“Actually I’m more concerned about a full cavity search. I don’t need more fingers up my ass.”

“That’s what a full cavity search is?” the one currently named Sparkler looked appalled. “What could people hide up there? Other than…” He grinned slightly.

“Lots of stuff. Most common one is drugs. Cocaine is a big thing to stuff up your butt to sneak it places. Prisoners do shit like this all the time. And that’s why you’ll get them if you resist.” Quinn, shrugging, turned to the large blond man standing quietly an grimacing, if going along with her rules. “Why haven’t you protested any of this?” He gave her a brief smile.

“I understand the need for order. And I think the idea of a full cavity search sounds highly unpleasant.” Quinn snorted.

“Can you get me DNA swabs?” She asked one of the guards at the door. “I need to get an identification on the one claiming to be Alec Griswald for sure.”

“How many do you want, ma’am?” The guard asked.

“Four. Ask the FBI agent at the front door. And tell him Quinn needs his help in the back.”

“Gotcha.” The guard nodded before walking off.

“There are FBI agents here?” Alec asked, scrunching his face in mil discomfort and confusion as he was was searched. “For a concert?”

“Yes, two of us are here.” Quinn showed her badge. “NASA detected a disturbance in the atmosphere in this particular club and my brothers just happened to have a show the night they expected the disturbance to manifest.”

The door opened and the guard returned followed by a man in black dress slacks and a red button down shirt. “Are these the suspects, Quinn?”

“Yes,” Quinn replied, ignoring Alec’s protests about being suspects. “Any casualties?”

“Not a single one.” The man grinned before turning to the four “suspects” and showing his badge. “I’m Agent Samuel Hamilton. This is my partner, Agent Quinn Faulkner.”

“This one’s claiming to be Alec Griswald, Samilton.” Quinn jabbed her thumb at Alec. ‘Samilton’ looked at him suspiciously.

“Is that so? If you’re really Alec Griswald, not only will you submit willingly to a DNA test, you’re in for a world of hurt for what you did to Quinn.” He glared, popping open the tube with the swab in it.

“Samilton…” Quinn warned. “I’m a big girl I can handle my conflicts on my own.” Alec stayed quiet, instead opening his mouth for the swab, his eyes on Quinn, who watched him back. “What did the NASA guy say about the disturbance?”

“Gone.” Samilton closed the tube and looked at the three strangers. “Do we want to swab all of them?”

“You won’t find their DNA in any system you have.” Alec finally looked at the other agent. “They’re not from Earth.” Quinn raised her eyebrows.

“Not from Earth…” She shrugged. “Okay. Here’s the deal. Samilton will get everyone’s DNA to the labs for analysis. I will take ya’ll into custody and we’re gonna chat about why three of you aren’t from Earth and where the fuck you ARE from. Any questions?”

“What’s DNA?” The dark skinned man who had been called Sparkler asked.

“DNA… How to explain DNA…” Quinn pulled out her phone and googled it.

“It’s the stuff that makes you you. Your genes and your traits and stuff. Color of your hair, shape of your nose, stuff like that. And that’s the elementary school definition.” Samilton explained, getting a ‘what the fuck’ look from Quinn. “I was going to go into genetics when I started college. Then my FBI calling kicked my ass elsewhere.” Quinn nodded.

“Alright boys, swab ‘em!” She grinned as she popped open a swab stick along with Samilton, who popped one open to swab the small man. She started with the large, muscly, blond man who leaned down at her instruction so she could swab his mouth.

“That tastes like cotton…Gross!” Sparkler (Quinn still wasn’t sure if that was his real name or a nickname) grimaced after Quinn ran the swab through his mouth. “Isn’t that unsanitary?”

“Dorian, this isn’t Thedas. There’s no magic and technology beats what Thedosians have by a long shot. Sanitation is easy.” Alec smiled at Sparkler (Dorian?), calming him.

“Hey Quinn, how come you got the tall guy and I got the short guy? Shouldn’t we have switched?” Samilton whined. Quinn smirked at her FBI partner.

“I know how much you appreciate chest hair, Sammy. And you know how much I like ‘em tall and beefy.” She cackled as the dwarf gave a hearty chuckle.

“Unfortunately for Samilton, I don’t roll that way.” He smirked at Quinn.

“Of course you don’t. I don’t either.” Samilton scowled, popping the lid closed on his swab’s tube. “I’ll get these samples to the lab. Do you want any backup, Quinn?”

“Yeah. Hurry your ass up at the lab, but make sure they test Alec’s sample first. I’ll take ‘em to Andon Gaol. Himchan should be good for backup until you arrive.” Quinn pulled out four pairs of handcuffs and pointed two of the security officers over. “I’ll need your help getting them into the vehicle. Ya’ll are getting handcuffed for appearances. Hands in front of you please.” The four men complied and she closed each pair of cuffs with a satisfying click.

 ****

The ride to Andon Gaol was filled with a stunned silence. The three foreigners were too shell shocked from a being in a loud carriage that moved without horses, Alec (or whoever he was) was so tired he fell asleep, and Quinn had a lot on her mind, none of her thoughts stopping as she pulled up to a gray concrete warehouse with absolutely no windows. “Look alive, sunshine.” She said, grabbing a key card out of the glove compartment to open the gate. “Hope you got some rest because you’re in for some long hours of talking.”

“Oh joy.” Dorian rolled his eyes. “Well, Varric can do most of it. We all know he’s a born chatterbox.”

“Sorry, you won’t be interrogated together.” Quinn didn’t sound (or feel, for that matter) the least bit sorry. She pulled out her phone and hit a speed dial on the home screen. “Himchan, I’m here with four suspects in the mysterious… Yeah... Mhm... Himchan I’ll debrief you inside just help me get them into their rooms!” She hung up with a sigh, four people staring at her oddly. “What, you’ve never seen an annoyed woman before?”

“You’ve changed, Quinn.” Alec said, his voice sad.

“Yeah, well. We all do.” She said coldly as a tall, thin, Asian man came to the group. Once he was at her side, she smiled. “Himmie! What’s the haps!?”

“Not much, was watching BTS on Jimmy Kimmel when you called. Anyway, these are the suspects? Samilton should have the DNA samples soon.” Himchan shrugged. “Let’s get them in.”

“Sounds good.” Quinn nodded, and as they lead the four men into the building. Himchan took Dorian and the tall, blond man to two cells on one side of the warehouse, and Quinn took Varric and Alec to two on the other side. Once the four strange suspects were in their own cells, Quinn met Himchan in his office. “What have you got for me?”

“The hole that appeared in the atmosphere within the venue was definitely nothing NASA’s ever been present for before, but the disturbance has happened once before.” Himchan frowned as he looked at Quinn. It happened the day Alec Griswald disappeared, and in the same area he was last seen.”