#I BETTER BE ABLE TO SLAP THAT OLD BITCH AROUND SEXY STYLE

[mbmbimbo]

for 70 god damn dollars i better be able to do a lot more with ganon than just "defeat him"

[fmdjoosungarchive]

restructuring task 1

+5 tracker points

1. assuming your muse has changed in some way, be it internally or as a result of a change of the external factors around them, how is your muse different? these can be as small as an opinion on a song they hadn’t released previously or as big as a major change in their background.

wc: 365

idk if i’ve said this on dash yet, but i’m treating new famed more or less like an au. in sung’s au, the defining change is that he was let go from gold star when he had his injury as a trainee. it was always my headcanon that they truly were close to cutting him loose anyway, so this is just the other side of that. he had his injury, got plastic surgery to try to appease them into keeping him, and they still let him go. when he went home his parents said alright u tried that now join the fam business n sung freaked bc he realized he doesnt want that for himself so he went to do smth he also hated, and joined the military. while there he still worked on his dance and vocals whenever he had a moment to do so, so that when he was discharged and started auditioning again, he wasn’t so rusty

he is a year younger in this world, just bc of quantum’s age range, not for any other reason. makes him a little less of a cradle robber in his relationship lol which, another change is that daisuke wouldn’t have been his first kiss, just first everything else

quantum is very different from old element and new element, but it’s very in line with what i liked about quicksilver (& has models from that) and he’s a leader! this is an idea ive toyed with a lot over the last three years tbh. at first i didn’t think sung suited a leader position, but he came to show me he’s just a different kind of leader. i liken him to jinki often in this regard. rather than lassoing members in, he supports them being however they are, and takes an intimate/emotional path to gaining their trust and leading them. and while he wasn’t suited for the full business life, what he learned from his father’s teachings helps him in dealing with the company as the group’s representative there (& he loves a good powerpoint presentation)

other timeline stuff for big events in his life are likely to shift but i’m not sure on specifics yet

2. what does your muse think of their company and their group?

wc: 260

as the child of a businessman, he’s never under the illusion that as a company entity, their first priority is their wellbeing. he knows that they are products, and that they’re treated as such. it’s a bit heavier with dimensions than gold star, since gold star makes a more active effort to pretend they care. however, once having accepted that, sung thinks himself and dimensions work well together. he does feel that for a company, they allow himself and his members to be a part of the creative process, as says their motto. he feels much more encouraged to write songs and choreograph under dimensions than he did under gold star, where it felt like he was constantly on his knees begging for the company to take him seriously

as for quantum, sung really loves what they’re about. he’s not a big fan of all (or most) of their songs, though he’s more loving towards a song written by another member even if it’s the same sound he dislikes, but he absolutely loves being focused on performance and concepts. his creative mind works very much on the basis of story and emotion that comes with it, and he feels like quantum’s concepts sometimes to often lean into his tastes. he’s always been a dancer first and foremost (god am i so glad to have his main dancer title back i MISSED u) so focusing on performance is v much up his alley, and his preferred style of dance is through storytelling. he feels the heart of dance is in that

3. is your muse on their first contract or their second? if they’ve renewed, what were their feelings around that at the time and what were their hopes for their second contract? if they haven’t renewed, what are their current thoughts on the end of their eventual first contract?

wc: 281

quantum’s on their first contract still, up for renewal in 2024. at the current moment, he would like to re-sign. however, unlike my others, his re-signing depends more heavily on the other members. if they were unhappy and wanted to leave, sung would want to follow suit, not because he can’t make his own decisions, but because if the reason the members want to leave is because of the company, not quantum, he’d want to try to help quantum continue to live. if that means all of the members leaving in order to rebrand under another company, so be it. he’d like to avoid lineup changes however he can, and ideally would like to be an idol for as long as possible

he himself feels alright about his treatment. he feels creatively stimulated, and appreciated for talents further than his face. if he were to try to negotiate different terms at their contract renewal, part of it would likely be wanting to give members a higher share of profits, especially on releases they’re creatively involved in. sung personally has no use for excessive money, but not all of his members have his background, and he feels more than just the money, it’s what’s fair. he’d also prefer to allow for more creative freedom. as a 7/8 year group by then, he’d think they should be allowed to take the reigns more heavily. and on his personal side of things, he would want dimensions to be more mindful of his schedule. sung enjoys working, but he’s only one person, who doesn’t want to be overworked. these are all just his current thoughts, though, and will probably change before contract renewal comes up

4. what are your muse’s goals and motivations?

wc: 294

his motivations to be ‘successful’ and/or achieve his goals are his family, namely being someone his nephew and niece can be proud of, and someone his parents can feel was worth letting go of. he feels closer to the latter than he did in old famed. his members motivate him to be a good leader, his desire to grow as a creator motivates him to write and choreograph

specific goals could be bigger like his desire for more public recognition. while quantum has a lot more recognition both in korea and abroad than element or quicksilver, sung wants the best for his group. he’d be happy if they stayed where they are with their loyal fandom, but he still aims for more

sung also wants to get better at standing up for himself. he’s best at standing up for others, because he can slap on a bit of bravado in order to help them out, but when it comes to himself, especially with his parents, he’s pretty awful at it

he’d also like to create more for quantum, and others. i/he have a goal for him to write a whole album for someone, so if anyone reads this far and could want sung writing for their muse, hit me up!

he’d like to get married and have children one day. that’s always been a dream of his, and while he knows his career doesn’t allow for that soon, it’s still on his docket

he wants to spend more time with his family, especially his nephew and niece. they’re so new to the world and learning everything, and sung wants to be a part of that. he doesnt want his part in their early lives to be ‘i don’t really remember seeing him back then’

5. what is one conflict, internal or external, that your muse is currently dealing with, has recently dealt with, or will need to deal with in the future?

wc: 291

at some point, this bitch is gonna have to admit he’s a homiesexual. in his previous version, it was a lot easier for him to ‘i pretend i do not see it’ when it came to that. sung’s very ignorant when it comes to the queer community in korea, so he’s not even really aware of terms beyond gay, maybe trans. but, terms aside, he always thought he was someone who liked women, and daisuke and a couple of others were just outliers. they were the Special ones outside of his jurisdiction that were just too good for him to not notice. aka he believed he was bi. and now, he still does, but i have less faith he’ll be able to hold that up until he dies like i did before, because he’s actually dated at least one woman before in this world. considering the plot has yet to be picked up, i don’t know the specifics, but i do think it’s harder to run away from when the way he treated a relationship with a woman and a relationship with a man were lightyears away from one another. it’s still possible for him to run away from the truth of the situation, but it’s also very possible that one day, his thoughts on it will shake, and everything will click into place (messily,, probably the messiest clicking ever) it would be a difficult thing for him to come to terms with, though i think it’s better for him in the longterm to truly know who he is, and why he acts the way he does, why he feels the way he does about women vs men. it’s also nice just to not live a lie, even if only privately

6. if your muse has established career claims, what are their thoughts on their career so far? if they do not, how do they feel about not having individual activities yet? what would they like to do in the future, if anything? if they don’t have ambitions for individual activities, explain why.

wc: 523

sung has a pretty filled history of individual activities. most are points claims with a focus on modelling, his radio, and music, though he’s dipped into pretty much ever facet of idoldom, some with more success than others. his ecp expenditures flesh that out a little more, and add a bit more realism, and/or make sense of the group changes. he had a one year modelling contract with the north face, and while official claims aren’t possible, i was inspired by a couple of things rowoon did with them. there was more of a push on an eco-friendly side of things, and there was a bit of dancing. playing into his group position with dancing i feel is fitting, but the eco friendly part i also feel could round out his image more as a good, kind boy who also can be sexy, whereas before, his earlier modelling claims focused a lot more on the sexy aspect, because it fit element and his trajectory there better. here, it makes him more dual sided from the beginning. north face is also just a nice, strong brand that i think is fitting for a pretty boi. i set it a bit after a year out from debut because i feel like that’s the most realistic, especially for a group like quantum that grew audience with each comeback

part of that first year being focusing only on the group ties into his creative claims as well! his first creative claim was with the bside love, lalala on the eternity ep. the nicest part of creative claims being unattached to positions is that all of sung’s claims are the songs in the discography most Him. so love lalala is very jazzy and smooth, and would have served as his first introduction to songwriting, as well as what made him interested in songwriting. then he was a choreographer on error, which is heavily story based, and about the members being a unit, and making beautiful pictures together. i hope to snag intro long journey and outro long journey from the beginning and end of the ateez sector, because they’re beautiful compositions that fit sung’s style, but also having him on both makes him feel like he’s a part of the concept’s creation in an intimate way, which fits with dms. then there’s aurora, which sung partially composed and partially choreographed. the choreography has contemporary flair to it, and the song is a flowing sound that matches that. then there’s partial production on sunrise, which i just love the robotic ass experimental production there, and comp for with u, which i believe ties back into sung’s rediscovering his love of piano. choreo for valkyrie is most similar to error in it’s pretty pictures way, and also has a bit of complex footwork, especially as its point dance, which is also p sung to want to include. and finally, some comp on stand by, which is like a mix of the appeal of aurora and with u methinks? listening to all of his written songs together i feel like really makes a picture of sung’s songwriting so i love that

[tabithasfantasies]

The Ride

Part 4

It must’ve been about 3am when I heard a truck door close waking me from my sleep. As I lay there on the couch I watch Howard come through the door and walk over to me. Without saying a word he picks me up in his arms and whispered in my ear “let’s go to bed babygirl.” Setting me down softly on the bed I roll over and watch as he strips down and climbs into bed with me. I snuggle up against him on my side looking at him as I lay my head onto his chest. He gently grabs my ass and pulls me tightly against him. Keeping his hand on my ass as we fall asleep with me feeling a state of love,happiness and fulfillment.

Waking up the next morning knowing it would be my last day with him for awhile I wanted to make it special. Easing out of bed I head into the kitchen and looking through the refrigerator and cupboards I found what I needed to prepare a nice breakfast of french toast,bacon and eggs. I start the coffee maker as I begin cooking. Twenty minutes later coffee and breakfast was ready. Setting our plates on the table I head back into the bedroom to wake him up. Nibbling on his ear while rubbing his chest I whisper “good morning my love” as his eyes open I lead him into the kitchen still buck naked. Now seated at the table we ate in silence as we gazed into each other’s eyes. After breakfast i took some of the now cool bacon grease and smeared it between my ass cheeks and into my love hole. Walking over to him I grabbed his limp cock guiding him to his feet as I lead him out of the cabin.

Now outside on the porch I sit him on a chair and kneel taking his cock into my mouth. Slowly sucking his massive meat rod. He quickly grows hard and I begin to sensually deep throat him going as deep as I could without gagging. Howard is now moaning as I continue my slow assault on his cock. “I’ve got to have you baby” as he pushed me off spinning me around and bending me over the porch railing. Spreading my ass cheeks he begins to lick my boipussy. I’m now hard and my clitty is dripping precum. He continues this for a few minutes until he stands up from the chair. He nestles his cock against my love entrance and slowly slides inside of me. I let out a squeal in pleasure and as I look out into the yard I see a couple deer watching us in our rut. Howard takes his time deep stroking me. We both begin to moan an groan. As Howard begins to pick up the pace the strokes become more shallow but are hitting me right on my prostate. I begin to shake violently all over and I scream out “I’m cumming daddy” he grips my hips tightly and continues at the same pace. Falling limp from such a powerful orgasm he slaps my ass “who’s your daddy” you are,you are I reply. Now he’s fucking me as hard as he can saying “take this cock babygirl” I’m screaming in pleasure fuck me daddy,fuck me daddy as I feel his cock swell inside of me my body again begins to tremble as he pushes in balls deep and explodes inside of me my whole body locks up squeezing every drop of cum out of him with my climax. He falls back into the chair in exhaustion pulling me with him still impaled on his cock.This causes him to get even deeper making me cum a third time. With us both wore out we sat there with his meat buried in me for a half hour recovering from our lovemaking.

Climbing off of his lap he slaps my ass and tell me I’m going to be the death of him but what a way to go. I head back inside and as I’m running my bath water he tells me “no time for that get ready we need to be at the clubhouse by noon.” So I fix my makeup and look through the closet to find something to wear. I find a pair of blue jeans with an upside down heart shaped cut out in the back. Now to find a top to go with the pants. I find a red leather teddy with lace up sides and a thong back that I settled on. I squeezed into the teddy with my DD breast forms stuffing the cups and creating cleavage. I had Howard pull the side laces tighter enhancing my figure. I then slipped on a pair of thigh high stockings before pulling on the blue jeans. Lastly I put on my red stilettos. The jeans fit perfectly and really accented my ass marvelously. While admiring myself in the mirror Howard presents a wig, it’s jet black and styled into a nice loosely braided ponytail. I try it on and I love it. Next he take a leather wrap and snaps it around the ponytail. He turns me around and kisses me on the forehead and says”babygirl you’re such a vixen but I’ve got one more thing I need you to wear.” Reaching into his pocket he pulls out a metal tag shaped like a cannon and attached it to my collar. He then slaps my ass and says “let’s ride”

After riding for about half an hour we pulled up to a closed down five and dime store with blacked out windows. Outside must have been thirty motorcycles with two club members watching over them. We parked and as we were heading inside one of the guards asked “so who’s the hottie there Howitzer” to which he replied “ Tabitha but she also goes by Vixen.” I feel the eyes upon me as we walk past and I hear one say “damn that’s one sweet ass.” Now inside I find it is decorated with sofas,tables and a bar. He leads me over to the bar and sits me on a barstool. A sexy redhead comes and he orders himself a bottle of Coors and I ordered a Jack and Coke. Once the drinks came he kissed me and left me alone at the bar. I watched as he headed into a back room until I heard hello I’m Cindy but they call me cinnamon. It was the barmaid I replied “hello I’m Tabitha but Howitzer told the guys outside that I go by Vixen.” She told me to “stand up and slowly turn around in a circle” so I did and then she told me that “Vixen fit me because that’s what I am.” We continued to chat with minor interruptions as she also worked the bar. Then out of the corner of my eye I saw my wife naked as a jaybird except for a collar being lead on all fours around the clubhouse on a leash with her handler announcing blowjobs $10 pussy $20 and ass $25.

I watched as man handed over $25 to her handler afterwards he dropped his pants and shoved his cock into her ass dry making her scream in pain as he fought to bury his average size cock into her. I was hard watching this seeing her being sold and abused. Tears were running down her face as he fucked furiously into her being cheered on by the crowd. Another biker approached her handler and gave him a ten dollar bill and pulled his big cock out and grabbed her head and began face fucking her. My wife’s face is now covered in black streaks from her mascara running as she is being fucked hard from both ends. The biker fucking her ass came first. He immediately pulled out and wiped his tool clean with her ass cheeks. It didn’t take much longer until a biker paid twenty to get at her pussy. He laid on the floor and made her ride him. He had a small dick and she easily took him in. Now in this position she was better able to satisfy the cock in her throat by using her hands too. It didn’t take long before he pulled out of her mouth and came all over her face and in her hair. There was now a line of bikers waiting to get at my wife. I felt an arm around my waist it was Howitzer. “Like the show he asked?” “That’s my wife” I replied. Keep your cool he whispered as he guided me into the back room.

Once inside I was introduced to three members who were seated at a table. It was the chapter President Mad Dog,Vice President Knuckle Head and secretary Splitter. I was told to take a seat so I sat down. Once seated Mad Dog explained why I was there. It was an investigation into the fight last night. He asked for my version of the events so I spoke up and said “we had came home and found an orgy going on in the living room Howitzer asked once for them to break it up but they kept fucking so he took his foot and nudged one guy off of the girl again saying break it up” Mad Dog says to continue to the part of Howitzer striking Birdman. So I continue “all of the guys jump up and put on their clothes when one of them said but you used to be ok with this and Howitzer replied yes but there’s a new lady of the house referring to me. That’s when Birdman says and I quote “fuck you and your bitch” Howitzer squared up to him and asked him what did you say. Birdman repeated what he said but this time called Howitzer an impotent old man. So Howitzer punched him once knocking him out.” With this Mad Dog dismissed me from the room.

Now out in the main part of the clubhouse I find my wife taking not one but two cocks in her pussy and one in her ass. She was orgasming one after another until she passed out from exhaustion. The bikers continued to fuck her until they busted their nuts in her or on her. I watched as her handler sold her again for $25 to a small biker. He walked over to her and stripped revealing a massive cock of 13” and rolled her onto her stomach. Grabbing her by her hair he slams his cock into her making Jennifer scream like a banshee. He pulls her hair harder making he arch her back as he began to fuck her. He’s now 10”deep and she’s crying in pain “please stop no more please stop I’ll suck you off.” The crowd starts chanting “Meat” over and over again as he fucks my wife. After about 15 minutes he pulled out moved to Jennifer’s face and emptied his balls all over her face. Her handler tugs at her leash and leads her into a dog kennel and she passed out in it.

I turn around to find Howitzer standing behind me.”So is Jen the chapter party slut really your wife?” He asked. Yes unfortunately I replied. “Great lawyer she is even gets the guys off outside of the courtroom.” Wanting to change the subject I asked “and how did your trial go daddy” he said “fine Birdman was denying the disrespect but your testimony helped seal his fate.” And that is I asked. “Well he got put on probation and has to do 500 hours of club service.” So did you get jealous from seeing your wife get gangbanged he asked. I replied “not jealous but excited” he then told me I could do it too if wanted it. I assured him by grabbing his package through his jeans and saying “this is all the cock I need,now let’s have another drink.” Sitting at the bar sipping my drink I ask “daddy when can you take me home” anytime you’re ready he replied. I finished my drink and daddy lead me to his chopper and rode me home. Now in front of my house we say our goodbyes and he tells me he wished that I could stay with him. I told him I’d be back at his place before next weekend. Following me up to my house we passionately made out for a few minutes until I pulled him inside ripped down his pants and sucked his cock one more time for the road. He came quickly this time filling my mouth with his sweet cum which I swallowed all of. Pulling me to my feet we kissed again. And he said “i love you and need you by next weekend you promise “ I replied “I love you too daddy and I promise.” He then walked out the door as I watched him ride off into the night.

The end

[sippin-on-red-wine]

No. 6 Collaborations Project: A review!

It’s been a week since this fabulous album has dropped into our hands. Click “Keep reading to hear my thoughts on each track!

Track 1. Beautiful People Khalid ★★★★ Favorite Lyric: You look stunning dear/So don’t ask that question here

Thoughts/Reflection: Ed keeps referring to this song as ‘cozy’ and I completely agree. The vibe is cool. I love the tone of his voice here and I think it meshes really nicely with Khalid’s. The content isn’t super relatable, but I think we can all take something away from this one. It’s a good note on self-awareness and being able to see the reality in things that may look glamorous on the surface. 

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Track 2. South of the Border feat. Camila Cabello, Cardi B ★★★★★ Favorite Lyric: So join me in this bed that I’m in/Push up on me and sweat darlin’/So I’m gonna put my time in/Won’t stop until the angels sing

Thoughts/Reflection: This track is literally freaking scorching hot fire. TBH I’m surprised that they led the album with IDC and not this one. It feels like big radio potential to me. Regardless, this song is an absolute BOP - so catchy and so fucking sexy. 

I know Ed’s Spanish leaves something to be desired ☺ But I feel like we can cut him some slack after singing (yet another) song dedicated to going down on a woman. The ginger is forgiven! Five stars for him! And I’m going to have SOTB on repeat all summer (or for the rest of my life).

Oh, I also really like Cardi on this song. IDK if she’s problematic or w/e, I don’t really follow her in the media at all. But her verse is fun. (I think Ed got a lil jungle fever AY) bahahahah

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Track 3. Cross Me feat. Chance the Rapper, PnB Rock ★★★★★ Favorite Lyric: Know she gonna slide anytime you bitches talk shit/Keep a lil blade in her fuckin’ lip gloss kit 

Thoughts/Reflection: Love love love LOVE this one. It just makes you want to get up and DANCE the damn thing! I have to laugh a little at the thought of Ed being hard & tough, lol, but it’s a cool concept nonetheless. Like he said in his Charlemagne interview, it’s kind of a love song…. but a different tempo. It’s catchy as all hell and Chance’s verse is fucking cool. 

Full points. 

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Track 4. Take Me Back to London feat. Stormzy ★★★★★ Favorite Lyric: Coz you can win BRITS (it don’t stop)/And you can do Glasto (headline slot)

Thoughts/Reflection: Fuck. This song, though. IIt’s the first one that jumped out at me when I did my first full album listen. And I haven’t stopped listening since. The chorus is so syncopated. Stormzy is sick on this track, I love his voice so much. And it just feels like the two of them really play off each other nicely and probably had a blast making this song. 

Also, Ed flexing “Grossed half a billi on the Divide tour/No I’m not kidding what would I lie for” is BDE and I’m personally really here for it.

This song is a banger and you should dance in your kitchen to it while baking pastries. FIve stars for you, Big Mike and Teddy.

(Dear God please let Stormzy guest live in Ipswich)

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Track 5. Best Part of Me feat. YEBBA ★★★★ Favorite Lyric: it’s not a lyric but that part when Ed & YEBBA are harmonizing perfectly in the whoooaaAAaaaA 

Thoughts/Reflection: I love the sound on this song! His voice is so raw and tender here. It reminds me of Plus era, but grown up. I think it may be how delicately he approaches the syllables in his verse and the chorus. YEBBA’s tone is super rich and lovely, and they sound great together.

I’m taking a “star” off here because I don’t love the lyrics. I get that he’s being vulnerable and showing insecurities in verse 1, but then YEBBA follows that up with lamenting about misplacing things and being late for the train? It doesn’t seem to match up with admitting physical/bodily insecurities. Also, it could just be that I hate that Ed thinks of himself this way.

DUDE IS HOT AF

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Track 6. I Don’t Care feat. Justin Bieber ★★★★ Favorite Lyric: I don’t like nobody but you/I hate everyone here

Thoughts/Reflection: Oh god. When did this song come out? I’m trying to think back to my first impressions of it, LOL. It’s bright and poppy and of course it went and stayed #1 all summer (thus far). I remember thinking it was so cool that the melody is super mainstream and upbeat, but the underlying theme is around social anxiety. “Crippled with anxiety/But I’m told I’m where I’m sposed to be” 

I mostly skip this one now that the full album is out, but I think I listened to it for a full 48 hours on repeat when it first dropped. Bieber is problematic and shit, and honestly I don’t think he adds much to the song. I really like Ed’s acoustic version where he does the whole thing solo.

The bridge slaps. Literally. I love that clapping bit behind it. I wish that Ed hadn’t fucked up the lyrics to the bridge in the acoustic version lolololol

Four stars, will bop along for many moons to come

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Track 7. Antisocial feat. Travis Scott ★★★★★ Favorite Lyric: So antisocial but I don’t care/Don’t give a damn I’m gonna smoke here/Got a bottle in my hand bring more tho

Thoughts/Reflection: DID YOU SEE HIM GUEST AT TRAVIS’ SHOW LAST NIGHT? This song was already one of my faves but holy shit. In interviews, Ed talks a lot about feeling awkward on stage without a guitar - but it didn’t look like that last night. He was bouncy as all hell, sounded great, looked great. Looked like he was loving the crowd’s energy too.

And the music video? That deserves a post all on it’s own.

This track is pretty short but it’s packed with good stuff. Ed’s intro is really strong here, the chorus is interesting despite the repetition. I physically can’t help but groove along to this tune. I’m sorry. I have no say in the matter

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Track 8. Remember the Name feat. Eminem, 50 Cent ★★★★★ Favorite Lyric: 20 years old is when I came in the game/And now it's eight years on and you remember the name/And if you thought I was good, well, then I'm better today

Thoughts/Reflection: YES. YES. YES.  The song intros with a reference to Ipswich, bitch. I love how Ed makes those connections back to his upbringing.

It’s a little unreal that these three iconic voices/styles can flow so well on a song and still sound so balanced. 

I’ve got this one on repeat too. I’m determined to learn all of the words damnit!!

Five stars for a tune that I would love to see performed live someday.

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Track 9. Feels feat. Young Thug, J Hus ★★★

Favorite Lyric: See you wigglin’, jigglin/If I have a bite will it taste like cinnamon?

Thoughts/Reflection: This song is fine. I like the feature verses. The song just doesn’t stick out that much for me.

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Track 10. Put It All on Me feat. Ella Mai ★★★

Favorite Lyric: I try to be strong but I got demons/So can I lean on you?/I need a strong heart and a soft touch

Thoughts/Reflection: Falsetto. Falsetto everywhere. I love that! Ella Mai’s voice is so rich. Unfortunately, I don’t have a lot more to say on this one. It’s not a song I’m playing on repeat, but I don’t skip it either.

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Track 11. Nothing On You feat. Paulo Londra, Dave ★★★★ Favorite Lyric: You and I/Whisky on ice/Maybe later we can turn down all the lights

Thoughts/Reflection: This song is SEXY and cool…. ‘smoke clouds and the scent of perfume’.... the imagery. Man. More falsetto here. Also, please go look up the translation of Paulo Londra’s verse. Thanks. I’m sweating. Is it hot in here? This album is *sexual* 

ALSO THE ‘BRRRP’ AFTER “they keep ringing my phone”  bahahahahah 

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Track 12. I Don’t Want Your Money feat. H.E.R. ★★★★★

Favorite Lyric: I need you here for the good times and the bad times/Yeah the pullin’ out my hair gettin’ mad times/Not just the when I’m in your bed on my back times

Thoughts/Reflection: THIS IS SUCH A GODDAMN TUUUUNEEEEEE!!!!!!! I love this song so much. 10/10 jamming out to this in the car at every opportunity. Finger snappin’ cool r&b vibe. I love the super quick tempo (but not quite rap?) in Ed’s verses. And I always appreciate the little double-meaning-references in Ed’s songs - like ‘diamonds, silver or gold’ means $$$ of course, but also just success in terms of album sales performance.

TBH when I saw the title on Ed’s tracklist reveal, I totally thought this would be a slow mushy love song about how Ed’s lucky to have found someone who wasn’t into him for his money. This was a pleasant surprise!! I love that it’s a little angsty.

Five STARS bitch I love this song and y’all are sleeping on it

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Track 13. 1000 Nights feat. Meek Mill, A Boogie Wit da Hoodie ★★★★

Favorite Lyric: Birds eye view/Pay my dues/For a two-mile queue

Thoughts/Reflection: i been ON for a thousAND NIGHTSSSSS NEW YORK TO LONDONNN DIFFERENT CITY EVERY DAYAYYY

1000 Nights: a flexy bop and I love it

This song is about the Divide tour which has been going for approximately 572 years. Not that I’m complaining.

But it’s cool (how many times have I said ‘cool’ in this post? don’t answer that). Ed loves touring and that comes out in this song. And Meek’s verse is so fun to rap along to!

Four stars.

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Track 14. Way To Break My Heart feat. Skrillex ★★★★★

Favorite Lyric: I can’t stop thinkin’ bout her/And her lips on mine, so soft/Feelings I don’t know the name of

Thoughts/Reflection: biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch.

This song is NOSTALGIC and I simply adore it. It has that same… “cozy” feel that Beautiful People does. Which is strange, considering it’s a song about heartbreak. But it’s just so. Soft. And warm. 

We’re back to super soft placement of words and such pure tone. 

It’s hauntingly beautiful. And yet uptempo! Bless, Skrillex. I especially love the drums that come in during the chorus, after “you’re still gone, and i’ll say”

PS, the soft sound of mouth smacking at :13. Use headphones.

Some of my favorite Ed songs are ones about heartbreak, and I appreciate that he included one here. About an imaginary heartbreak 👀

Take another five stars from me, bud

- Track 15. BLOW feat. Chris Stapleton, Bruno Mars ★★★★★

Favorite Lyric: Hot damn/Pop it like a pistol mama/You got me down on my knees/Baby please?

Thoughts/Reflection: *laughing nervously*

Again, definitely not what I expected out of this track when the titles were all revealed. I LOVED release day on this one. The world collectively lost their shit. I need nothing more in this world than to see this song performed live, especially with a full band and Ed on an electric guitar. 

I’m still not over this loud, full, energetic song full of men bellowing about wanting to, well, fuck.

Bye

(five stars from me and also my 62 year old coworker Jan)

:::OVERALL:::

This album is SO GOOD MATE and I already cannot wait until the next collabs project! Ed blessed us with 15 amazing tracks to tide us over until Subtract comes out. They’re so different from his normal album stuff and I really love to see him try new sounds and get to create/collaborate with artists he admires so much.

it also has me real hot and bothered lmao

Thanks for coming to my tEd talk.