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#I did meet a dude who actually plays age of empires so that's fucking sick.
neverendingford
·
6 months
Text
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#tag talk
#kind of morose rn. I wish kind wasn't functionally the same as trusting.
#I wish trusting wasn't the same as gullible
#I wish gullible weren't the same as stupid
#I know so clearly that lies are easy to tell. and yet I know that in order to live freely I need to choose to believe sometimes
#and this is one of those times I knew would happen. the inevitable failure that walks hand in hand with trying
#and I will try again. because failure is a chance but not a guaranteed outcome. but it's annoying. it's exhausting.
#this is about getting stood up twice in one night. in case you thought something actually important happened. nothing big. but annoying
#annoying when you put out your genuine self as the best way to attract authenticity in others and instead it's played with
#and I guess I should have looked for more ahead of time. demanded reciprocal honesty instead of simply trusting things would work out
#trust but verify.
#I just. I don't have a cynical bone in my body. I've had to learn all this
#and I rephrase stories to make myself sound cleverer than I really am because I can think of a million witty retorts an hour later
#but in the moment I'm just naive and trusting and over messaging it's so easy to take advantage of that
#and I can't even report them for the undoubtedly stolen pics they baited me with because they block as soon as the game is up
#oh well. live and learn and take away the experience and use it for something
#I did meet a dude who actually plays age of empires so that's fucking sick.
#got stood up twice. but met two actually cool people so it works out maybe. we'll see what happens.
#I just- bruh how hard is it to get some good dick in this town?
#anyway. I had a nice walk around the park while I waited. found a gravel hill with a hollow on the top and waited there to escape the wind
#it was actually a really nice time at the park aside from the social circumstances
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