#I love that I can't even consistently keep him mean ahaha

[placeinthemiddleofnowhere]

Saw one of your posts mentioning how mean Konig wouldn't let anyone see him hideout his mask even reader, only though if they blindfold them and gave me an idea of reader requesting Konig to do it so they can have the freedom of exploring his face.

Kinda cute idea like reader wanting to at least learn how he looks even by this way and Konig at first feeling embarrassed doing this but eventually he gives in.

SCREAMING

Look at what you made 😭 they’re so soft and König is so sweet and vulnerable, but look at those big broad shoulders omg look at ittttt 💕

-

“I can’t believe I let you talk me into this,” König grumbled, his voice slicing through the quiet darkness.

You laughed, rolling your eyes even while they were being obscured. The thick velvety fabric that was wrapped carefully around your face ensured that you wouldn't see anything for the time being. Tight as it was, tied as if keeping something valuable secured, you didn't mind it too much. It was the only way that König would fulfil your wish.

About a week before he'd mentioned off-handedly that if you finished on top in the upcoming training exercise he'd give you anything you wanted. Anything. You'd been so stressed out about the exercise before his offer. Though now that you have the promise of a reward you had something other than the crippling fear of your failure to train your mind on.

No doubt he'd figured you'd ask for something of some kind of worth, some privilege or a treat that couldn't be found in or around the base. He'd even brushed off your request initially thinking that you must be joking, but on the second time round he just stared at you hard and calculating, blue eyes refracting the pieces of his conflicting thoughts, until he sighed and gave you his ultimatum.

He would bare himself to you completely, take every stitch of fabric from his body, but in return, you'd have to wear a blindfold.

You were surprised he'd even entertained your idea, nevermind allowed a compromise. Afterall, König never showed you more than the bottom of his face, never let you see more than a flash of the mouth that you’d occasionally have the privilege of kissing. At best you thought he'd tell you to pick something else and at worst...maybe a trip over his knee or the back of the couch.

However that wasn't the case, because there you were, situated on his lap and doing everything in your power not to combust with excitement. You'd have been shivering sitting in his cold room if it weren't for the heat of his warm skin and the burn of anticipation that shot through you, waiting for him to take off his last piece of clothing. His mask.

It had been a few minutes since he'd beckoned you to come sit, grabbing your wrist and pulling you over to perch over his massive thighs. The seconds had ticked by slowly after that, trickling away as you traced the lines of his back muscles and tried to soothe him.

Even just getting him fully naked below the neck was something foreign, each new feeling and reaction was new. Every little sensation felt like a firework against yours nerves - Getting to feel the fine hairs on his legs shift underneath your thighs, the little raised lines that littered his skin and revealed themselves under your fingers when you traced his shoulder blades, the shiver you elicited when you found each of those old scars, the soft groan he let out when you kissed the hollow of his shoulder.

"König, I know that I asked you for everything off, but if you're not fully comfortable you can always say no," you murmured, wasting no time in offering his trapezius another kiss.

He shivered underneath you, his body lightly shuddering like a well contained storm.

"A promise is a promise, Schatz," he sighed.

"I care more about your comfort than a silly promise," you assured, laying your head against him.

He hummed at that. It filled the room and hung in the air, the sound of it echoing in your muddy thoughts as you contended with the crackling silence. Everything was still for a moment, nothingness settling like dust.

Sometimes, in the worst of your moments when you locked yourself away in your room with all of your baying bad thoughts, you wondered if he would disappear from your life one day. You’d suffer over the image of him leaving you with only the memories and the outline of a man. You’d never even really know who he was. Though he’d scoff at it any time you so much as hinted at the idea.

This was stupid, he shouldn't have to make himself uncomfortable, all because you wanted to chance your lu-

The whoosh of heavy cloth being discarded to the ground stopped your thoughts in their tracks. Cold air rushed by your head and then presumably, you thought, the mask lay abandoned at König's feet. He was fully bared to you now - just as he'd said he would be.

"König you-"

"Don't worry about it," he said, voice strained and quiet. "Just do whatever it is that you wanted to do."

You tilted your head at that, pursing your lips in dissatisfaction. What you wanted was to feel him properly, get to experience the hulking soldier that normally ordered you around and intimidated even the most high ranking commanders in a way that you never had before. You didn’t want to take advantage of the vulnerable man that was hissing out at you, rattlesnake defences alerted. 

“König, you trust me don’t you?” you asked, trailing your fingers along his shoulders and to his exposed neck. 

You gently curled your hand around it, settling it there while you worked your other one along his otherside, coming over the crest of his biceps and creeping slowly upward. There was no rush, you could take your time with him. You could relax and listen to his quick little breaths, waiting for his answer as you tried to mould him into a relaxed state.

“Why do you ask that?” he said finally. 

Deflection.

He was famous for it. It was no wonder in this case especially, he was crawling with the unfamiliarity of the situation, though you couldn’t quite decide on why he didn’t want to give you a direct answer. It seemed unlikely he wanted to spare your feelings, so that did that mean he was just afraid of saying the answer out loud? You smiled to yourself and shook your head. 

“I’m asking because I want to know - do you trust me?” you repeated.

“Does it matter?”

“Yes. It does.”

“I…I don’t…,” he sighed again, and all at once the tension dropped from his body, almost sending you wobbly over his lap. “I trust you enough to do this. I wouldn’t let anyone else do this. Is that sufficient?”

“It’s not about sufficiency - this isn’t a test. I just want you to be comfortable with me, I don’t want you asking me to do my worst,” you smirked, hoping that your smile would reassure him.

Your heart was skipping beats now. Your mind was at war, on the one had you felt comfortable - felt like you were on even footing with the man before you for once, and on the other knowing that you’d dragged König down to your level was enough to throw you off the metaphorical horse. 

“I think that’s what I might have said to myself the moment I introduced myself to you,” König chuckled, the timbre of it much tamer and friendlier than you were used to. 

You snorted, finally bringing your second hand up so that you were touching your fingers together behind König’s neck. His skin was so soft there. 

“Do you really think that I’m capable of hurting you that badly?”

König breathed out, a sound that caught between laughter and anguish escaped from him. Though before you could question it, he snaked his arms around your back and clutched your shoulders in his hands, gripping you like a half drowned man that’d found his float. 

“You’re the only one in this whole world that can hurt me,” he whispered.

It was so quiet he almost might as well have spoken it to the wind. Though you still heard it unmistakably through the static. Confirmation that you meant so much more than just a fun outlet at the end of a heavy work day. You weren’t a punching bag, or even just a pretty doll to manipulate and exert his will on, you were evolving into something else. 

And he’d clearly never had something else before. 

“König, I won’t hurt you,” you said, moving your hand up once more to cup his cheek. “I promise.”

His skin could’ve been glowing, it was so warm. You bit your lip as you traced the outline of his stubble and felt yourself smile at knowing you could feel the shape of him underneath your gentle touch. The room melted away then, it felt like you were both floating through a vacuum somewhere in the universe. You were the only two that mattered.

“We will see, won’t we,” König muttered, tilting his head so that he could kiss your palm.

You shook your head and wasted no more time in threading your hands through his hair, reaching up to where you supposed the back of his head was and striking gold when you landed in his soft curls. You desperately wondered what colour his hair might be, wanting to drink in the richness with your own eyes. Though that would have to wait. 

“A promise is a promise,” you said finally, “So trust me.”

You kissed him then. With a little hesitancy you leaned forward and pursed your lips and with luck he leaned toward you and brought you home. His mouth was perfect against yours, the curve of his lips pressed firmly to yours and in an instant you forgot about all the worries you had, all the uncertainty and the self doubts - they didn’t matter.

You only hoped he felt the same.

[mxanigel]

what we have is each other

The lovely @socially-awkward-skeleton and @captastra tagged me to play with this relationship template!

That's a fantastic template for two people. And I hope to use it for Vix and Shadowheart once I explore more of their journey. But. Uh. My current brainrot is my AoT OT3. So I'm stealing this opportunity to share the latest version of their chart (OT3 template here).

Explanatory rambles below the cut!

-----

Hange is a chaotic non-binary mess of a leader soldier, Levi is a clean freak who blunt and crass and so deliberate with emotions that he doesn't express them like others do, and OC Shion is a broken sunshine character seeking joy on her better days and clawing for meaning on her worse ones.

[greeting each other] Levi consistently uses demeaning terms toward Hange. "Idiot," "four-eyes," etc. When he uses their name, it's a big deal. I haven't figured out what he'll call Shion, but since she confessed so early in their relationship, he didn't have a chance to come up with something like what he calls Hange before Things Changed between them.

[First to confess] ahaha yeah Shion first tells Levi she loves him in chapter 9. We're on chapter 23 and neither Levi nor Hange have used those words. (but we're getting so damn close aaaaaaa)

[First to kiss] Levi kisses Shion after she confesses. He can't articulate why. She doesn't press him to. He knows she's important to him, something he shows in a thousand little ways. (Hange's a force of nature and takes all of this in stride in chapter 10 in very Hange-esque ways.)

[Dies for the others] OHOHO the WAYS this could happen depending on timeline and adherence to canon. Dare I explore a worldstate in which Shion dies to save Hange's life? WE SHALL SEE

[Prone to hide their feelings] This condition is in Levi Ackerman's blood okay. And an innocent chapter 8 conversation leads Hange to hide their feelings for both Shion and Levi to some extent. Their affection? Not at all hidden. Their romantic feelings? BURY THAT SHIT. Until they can't keep it buried any longer.

[First to apologize after a fight] Shion is not one who tolerates strain between herself and those she loves. Especially if she's the person responsible for it. But when that strain exists for reasons outside of her control… she won't apologize for the sake of apologizing. And she's learning not to apologize for who she is or how she feels.

["Excuse me, they asked for no pickles"] Shion will sit there and roll with things (and may encourage others to do the same depending on the situation) but there is no freaking way Levi or Hange would accept any of the three getting pickles when they didn't ask for pickles, lol.

[Spoils the others] How said spoiling occurs depends on the person, but they're each ready able and willing to spoil the other two.

[Wakes up first] Levi canonically doesn't sleep much. So I headcanon that Hange has experimented with sleeping draughts (experiments which always piss off Levi regardless of effectiveness because Hange takes it as a personal challenge to slip him one without him noticing). But for this relationship, he's the first one awake which has already manifested multiple times in the fic. The very limited scenarios in which he wouldn't wake first are super fun to play with~

["What's updog?"] I took this line less literally, seeing it as which of them are the most casual in speaking to the others, most likely to make puns, etc. And that's 100% Hange.

[First to propose] Once the OT3 shakes off its rocky romantic restart, this is unnecessary. Hell, even before the official confessions, they're already a unit.

[Wants children] I actively avoid giving my OCs children. I stopped writing for one in part because it seemed like children were a likely outcome. And then Shion comes along and turns that on its head. So. There's a kid in one possible future. With three parents who love her very much.

[Didn't know they were dating] The they-were-already-a-unit thing I mentioned earlier comes into play here. I have mixed feelings about the word "dating" here only because it tends to have romantic connotations, and both Shion and Hange's initial feelings are strongly platonic. But given how much I adore Levihan and that this is my first-ever OT3, plus after thinking long and hard about how Shion eventually feels about Hange and vice versa, I decided all of their feelings would be considered romantic.

[Initiates contact] Shion holds back SO HARD from being affectionate toward Levi, but he picks up on that (and appreciates it) and works to communicate when he's more open to that sort of thing. Not that he's good at it, but he tries. Meanwhile, Hange is alllll about touching and other affectionate gestures, which helps further lower the barrier for the other two.

[Approached first] Shion kind of sort of approached Levi first (remember, she was holding back) and Levi, once he's open to taking another step, doesn't hold back. But I'm thinking about this romantically, and Hange is highly reticent to show romantic advances toward either one knowing that Shion has feelings for Levi.

[Says the L word first] Shion 100%.

[The oblivious one] I'm using "oblivious" a bit loosely here; Levi takes a while to sort through what to name his feelings, and Hange hangs out in denial for quite some time.

-----

No-pressure tagging people to play with either template and/or just skimread my OC+blorbo rambles~ @poetikat @mxkelsifer @milesmentis @arendaes @outpost51 @dr-paine @saraptor @perhapsrampancy @spindleweedss @marythegizka

[jujywrites]

Unheavy

oh my GOSH this WIP has been in my folders for so long............. I had a lot of fun finally finishing it. brandy-new fresh fic starring my most beloved trio~

AO3 (with art!!! By others I commissioned not me ahaha)

FF.net

or keep reading

~~~

Tohru felt unnerved when she couldn't read Kyo's eyes, even after the years she'd spent with him. It had taken him so long to let his emotions fully out so they were visible in sideways glances and half-lidded stares, visible in the myriad ways his irises changed shade. When he'd felt safe enough to do that it had been such a fragile gift, one she had to treat gently lest it disappear.

She had other things to read now. His body language, his touch, his voice. She had that intangible trusting bond with him. Faith in all of that had to be enough now.

Wasn't it?

"You're worrying again," he said next to her in bed that evening, voice sleepy-slow. "I can hear you."

She turned on her side to face him, curling her hand around his. "I'm thinking about what you said today. That I should go talk to him. You said you were ready, that you want me to, but I…"

"You still aren't sure I meant it?"

She had gotten better at reflex apologizing, but she offered a small one with her smile. "Your eyes didn't seem to match your words."

"Oh… I see." He kissed her forehead, inhaled against her skin. "Maybe some part of me isn't ready. But if that's true, I can't feel it." When he pulled back into her field of vision, he had a sunset smile. "I'm as eager to see what happens next as you are. Please, please go ahead."

A weight dissolved from her chest. With an answering smile, she shut her eyes and cuddled into his chest. "Kyo-kun."

"Tohru."

"Tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow. I love you."

"I love you. Sleep well."

###

Yuki was too old for this kind of thing. What full-grown adult turned into a high-schooler whenever his old crush came around? When they were quite firmly and comfortably friends, at that? And when his best friend was her fiancé?

Him. Unfortunately. Every time he saw Tohru, another piece fell from the wall keeping certain words contained, and today the wall took another hit. A big one. Because here she was at his apartment, unannounced, with a basket of freshly-made mochi for no reason other than she wanted to bring him some. Well, the sweets weren't unusual, but the rest certainly was.

"Please come in," he said when his brain broke through the fog of pleasant spring smells from the breeze behind her.

"It's been a while!" Tohru smiled as she said it, removing her shoes and stepping inside.

He couldn't help a small laugh. "We had lunch last Thursday."

"Ah, well—" She laughed too, cheeks coloring. "Kyo and I have been so busy, it feels longer than that. Oh!" She reddened further. "I, I don't mean to keep you long..."

"Not at all. The bookstore closes early on Saturdays."

"It's Saturday! Of course. I knew that." More laughter, flailing hands (he took the basket gently from her arm).

"How's Kyo?" he asked as he set the basket on the table. A nudge toward familiar ground.

"He's wonderful! This week was much better. He had a breakthrough with Fudou-kun, you know, at the dojo? They really connected, and Fudou-kun's technique has improved so much…"

He listened intently, asking questions here and there, only briefly distracted by her eyes or how she seemed to have absorbed the perfume of the outdoors.

He could listen to her talk forever. (He could listen to her talk about Kyo forever.)

"Here." She pulled two mochi from the basket and handed him one. "I've been talking so much we haven't tried these yet!"

He bit into it to avoid thinking about the crinkle around her eyes as she took a bite.

And then he couldn't think about anything for a few seconds, a sweet strawberry filling lighting up his taste buds so strongly he barely held back a noise that would have been embarrassing. The surrounding mochi tasted like something complementary—basil, maybe—and was the perfect consistency. He finished it swiftly and reached for another while he tried to think of what to say.

"Delicious…!" Wiping her mouth delicately, Tohru smiled at him in a way that made his pulse speed up just a bit, then said, "Kyo made those."

Heat on his neck; he couldn't blush, he wouldn't. "Really?"

She nodded, taking another. "He was so nervous, but he really wanted to. He remembered how much you love strawberries, Yuki-kun."

Yuki paused, mochi halfway to his mouth. The air changed, pressing in on him. "They are delicious." He finished that mochi, then said, "I need to thank him when I see him again."

She made an assenting noise, hands clasped on the table. "He'll be very happy you like them!"

He could still smell flowers around her. The air was still heavy. He sat up on his knees and reached across the table, sweeping Tohru's hair back from one shoulder.

Her eyes widened, pink creeping into her face. "Yuki-kun, I—"

Her mouth, too, tasted like strawberries. Her lips moved against his after a moment, and he thought her hand was on his shoulder—then all of a sudden, the hand bracing him began shaking up through his arm, and he pulled back breathing shallowly.

He stared, she stared back, and his heart sank. "Tohru." His voice was reedy; he tried again. "I'm, I'm sorry, I don't know what—"

But she stood and moved to his side of the table, hands spread placatingly. "Yuki-kun, Y-Yuki, no, it's all right." She spoke quickly, kneeling beside him. She put a hand over his shaking one. "I need to tell—"

A sharp gasp cut her off; she bent double, forehead hitting Yuki's shoulder, a pained "oh" escaping her.

"Tohru?!" His hands flew to her shoulders, but he didn't know whether to hold her or prop her up. "What's wrong?"

With a groan, she straightened and met his eyes. She'd gone pale. "I think… O-Ow." She winced.

Blinking, he followed her gaze down to see her arms wrapped around her belly.

"I mean, I didn't think—" She hissed and leaned against him again. "Oh, Yuki, I'm sorry. I need to go back to mine, Kyo has— there's— it hurts, Yuki, please…" Her voice was steady despite the broken words and her trembling body.

"Of course." He stroked her hair, willing his heart rate to calm. "It's okay, sweetheart, everything will be fine."

(He realizes he said the endearment out loud far too late.)

###

Kyo didn't expect Tohru to come back being carried bridal-style by Yuki, but maybe things had gone well.

One look at her pale face told him they had not.

"She just collapsed," Yuki said, barely out of breath from the stairs, voice calm but eyes full of panic. "I didn't know what else to do."

Kyo's stomach clenched while he took Tohru gently from him; she felt overheated even though she was shivering. "Shit. Was something wrong with the mochi?"

"N-No." Tohru blinked up at him. "Kyo, I need the heating pad, a-a-and—" She moaned weakly, hiding her face against him.

Oh. "Oh, okay." Face flushing more from Yuki's possible secondhand embarrassment than anything else, he made a path to their bedroom, saying to Yuki, "You can come."

"Let me walk, please," Tohru said when they entered, and Kyo let her down despite his misgivings. She wobbled toward the bathroom. "I need to get a, um…"

He coughed and told Yuki, "Heating pad's in the hall closet." Then he detoured to her underthings drawer and followed Tohru, getting her aspirin and a glass of water while she equipped her armor (an offhand joke that had stuck).

Yuki had plugged the heating pad in by the bed when the two of them came back, and pulled back the bedcovers without being asked. His anxious fluttering nearby was oddly comforting, after Kyo settled her in.

"I'll set it for half an hour," he said, handing her the pad to adjust. "When was the last time you looked at the calendar?"

"It came early, I think." She gave a wan smile.

"Well, I figured that much."

She giggled and immediately winced, breathing raggedly.

"Okay, baby, just lie down." He stroked her forehead when she did, watching her carefully, laying his other hand feather-light over her abdomen. "Would more pressure help?"

She shook her head; he took his hand away.

"Temp's good?"

"Yes." She sighed, eyes closing.

"Good. You're home and comfy, you're gonna feel better really soon."

He felt Yuki close by him while he waited for her to fall asleep, and held back the urge to take his hand.

When her breathing deepened, when it had evened out for some time, he sighed softly and slowly got up from the bed. "Come on," he said to Yuki, taking a few steps to sit on the floor at the foot of the bed.

"Shouldn't we leave?" Yuki followed anyway, sitting beside him.

"Nah. She'll sleep through anything for a while now." He tilted his head back against the bed with a sigh, closing his eyes. Just a few moments.

"Your mochi's still at my place," Yuki said, quiet voice sounding loud in the silence.

"No problem." He grinned, feeling warm when Yuki smiled back. "They were for you, after all. How were they?"

"When are you going to make more?"

This guy. "Whenever you like." And he took Yuki's hand before he thought anymore. "I hoped you'd like 'em." Then, because he was internally panicking, he changed the subject. "So what did you do to her?" he said, in a lightly ribbing tone.

Whether Yuki's blush was from the hand-holding or the comment was (thankfully) impossible to tell. He looked down, maybe at their hands. "I… well, I…" Then he looked up, directly at him, and said so softly Kyo wanted to lean in, "I kissed her."

"You… kissed her." He kept his face neutral and his breathing even. There was a chance he'd misheard. Then again, if things were moving faster than he thought…

"I kissed her," Yuki said a bit louder, his hand clenching in Kyo's. "Kyo, I'm sorry, I said that to her too, but she'd been looking at me and I just felt— something and I really didn't mean to but she wasn't upset, at least I don't think so, she tried to say something before s-s-she…!"

"Hey." He clapped his other hand to Yuki's shoulder, squeezing. "Breathe easy, idiot. I'm not gonna kill you."

Yuki shook his head with a weak laugh. "Now I know why she was in pain. I seriously thought I'd caused her harm."

"You could never. Besides, sometimes her cycle gets thrown off by stress she's causing herself."

"If I made it worse, then—"

"Nope." He squeezed Yuki's shoulder again and lifted their joined hands, contemplating for a moment before gazing at Yuki again. "Stress can happen because of good things too."

He saw that blush returning and purposely waited. At least part of Tohru's instinct had turned out to be correct, so maybe he could… Well. He wasn't planning to bust the guy's ass too hard, but what was the harm in a little bit of fun?

"She did have something she wanted to tell you," he said more softly, leaning in just a bit. "And she was excited to tell you. She'd been wanting to for days, Yuki. The mochi was an excuse and a reason."

Yuki opened his mouth to speak (and Kyo wasn't going to, he was not, he'd wait for—).

"So you'll have to wait until she wakes up." He allowed a half grin. "I'm not taking it away from her just because her uterus decided to be a brat."

The grin grew full at Yuki's desperately stifled laughter. "Kyo—"

"I literally do not care, and you shouldn't either, especially since Tohru doesn't. I mean, it took me a while until I realized I felt weird about it just 'cause I figured she felt really weird about it, since ninety-nine percent of dudes are like, actually weird and really stupid about it. Not buying tampons or whatever, or flipping the hell out seeing or hearing about tampons, for fuck's sake. It's her period, it's normal, fucking grow up."

He blinked then, taking in Yuki's expression; it was the smile that showed everywhere but on his mouth. His own face felt warm suddenly. "Okay, so I didn't mean to rant at you, specifically? I just have… opinions on this shit."

"You're really good for her," was all he said, a few beats later than Kyo would've liked.

"I mean. It's basic human decency…" Oh my god, shut up. Idiot.

"Either way," Yuki said, and then he smiled with his mouth too, and Kyo saw for the millionth time why 99% of Kaibara High had been in love with him, and that hadn't even been the real Yuki. He almost smirked, realizing. This Yuki was all theirs. His and Tohru's.

"Do you think some tea would help her feel better?"

From the floor, Kyo blinked up at Yuki standing, at his held-out hand. The train of thought had disoriented him. "Uh, well, if you're offering…"

He'd swear Yuki sparkled at him. "Oh, tea is one of the few things I've learned how to make properly."

"My god, the prince figured out how to boil water," he intoned, taking Yuki's hand and rising to his feet. "Fuckin' miracle."

Yuki just grinned.

In the kitchen, he tugged Kyo around with him rather than dropping his hand. Damn it, waiting for Tohru was going to be tougher than he thought.

"Where do you keep your… oh, wait, I remember." Yuki needed both hands to retrieve the teabox (one of many) from its upper cabinet. "And then…"

Honestly, he moved around their kitchen like he lived there (had he really been over that often?). Kyo stood and watched, hands behind his back, fighting a hiccup-y feeling in his chest.

"Please, sit," Yuki said. "I promise I've got this."

So Kyo sat on the cushion at the living area table, just outside of the kitchen. It was a funny feeling that he could probably turn his back and Yuki would still be fine, but he faced the kitchen anyway, not wanting to look away from him.

Watching Yuki gave room for other thoughts to crowd Kyo's brain. For instance: no, he wasn't theirs, yet or ever; even if he wanted to be with him and Tohru, nobody belonged to anybody. And really, she hadn't even asked yet. Maybe this secrecy wasn't for the best in the first place… But no again. It was Tohru's idea, her plan, and he trusted her to know what she was doing.

When it came down to it, she knew both of them better than anyone.

Kyo knew him pretty well too, though, and he wouldn't even think about teasing him if not for the... vibes he'd been giving off, today and in the past. For all the clichés about animal instincts, it still held true for the two of them. And Kyo's instinct was giving him a kind of hope he'd be afraid of if it weren't for Tohru.

What he meant by theirs wasn't ownership, of course not. More like… all for each other, in a way that no one else knew or understood but them. Yep, he was a hopeless romantic. And he'd kill anyone who found out, besides Tohru.

And besides Yuki. He wouldn't mind Yuki knowing, eventually. Because— because Kyo really…

He sighed and laid his head on his arms.

###

Making tea was a form of meditation for Yuki. Teen Yuki, or even the Yuki of two years ago, wouldn't have thought such a thing was possible. But he always liked drinking it, and gardening, and one time he brought home a stack of library books devoted to cultivating, planting and brewing so-called tea plants. He'd become determined, all of a sudden, to be at least moderately less of a menace in the kitchen, and making tea seemed a good place to start. Every so often Kyo or Machi or Tohru would help (mostly by ensuring nothing caught on fire), but he had insisted on doing as much as he could on his own.

He had quite the repertoire now. Knowledge about brewing bagged tea and pre-made loose leaf mixes, yes, but he'd also gained the courage and ideas to create fresh mixes of his own (taste-tested first, of course). If he had planned this visit to Kyo and Tohru's apartment, he would've brought some mixes with him. They had only tea bags, though a nice variety. He selected the chamomile after brief consideration.

"Oh," he said under his breath, a verbal lightbulb. He'd bring some next time as thanks for Kyo's mochi. She might like that ginger-mint mix. Kyo… maybe blackberry? Or maybe…

The kettle whistled, shaking him out of reverie. He moved on autopilot; three cups, on to the tray, lift. "It's ready," he announced as he turned, "but maybe Tohru is still…"

He trailed off; Kyo had essentially face-planted on the table. Blinking, he traversed the distance, set the tray down, and was lifting a cup when Kyo lifted his head. "You look like you could use yours now." He held it out. "Are you all right?"

"Yeah, no, it's—" was he blushing? "—just the adrenaline draining, I guess. Didn't know what happened to her at first and all." He took it, took a sip, mumbled, "Thanks. Thought you were just making it for her."

Yuki sat with his own cup, though he wanted to check on Tohru; he'd let Kyo lead on that. "I made a full pot, there's three of us, why not." After a brief drink, the warmth almost burning, he asked, "Do you like blackberries?"

A blank stare. "I guess so. Why?"

"My latest tea is blackberry. I could bring you the mix if you'd like." Feeling vaguely nervous, he jiggled one leg under the table.

Kyo brightened (Yuki stopped fidgeting). "Oh, nice. Sure. Tohru likes those fruit and flower teas, too." One long drink, a sigh, and then he continued, "I should probably make more mint tea for this part of her cycle. Help her stomach. Or, like, ginger or something."

Belatedly realizing he'd basically been staring at Kyo the entire time, Yuki said (with only a little stumble), "Ah, w-well, I'm actually working on a ginger and mint tea, I don't know if it'll combine well but I—"

"No kidding? We'll try some." With a flash of a smile, Kyo added, "Hey, maybe you can give us some tips on brewing our own stuff. But, I mean, not like we have much room for a garden here…"

Completely unprompted?! He tried to keep his rising happiness inside. "You don't need much room. Even just a windowsill is a fine starting place." Half of him dearly wanted to expand on plant types, the amount of sunlight, and everything else; the other half was deeply embarrassed and also aware of the third untouched cup of tea, so he stopped himself.

"Tohru's ahead of me, then," Kyo was saying, "with her window herb gardens and stuff—"

Does she grow rosemary? That's great with lemon. But lavender tea!!!

"—let's bring her tea before it cools too much."

"R-Right." He stood, reaching for the cup at the same time Kyo did, brushing fingers. He couldn't stop a nervous chuckle, cursing his again-warm cheeks when he said, "After you."

But Kyo was also, most definitely, blushing this time. "Sorry."

Yuki let him lead the way, hovering in the bedroom doorway while Kyo entered.

He had to hide a smile that would have been much too wide when Kyo told him to come in too.

###

Eyes closed, Tohru could feel herself rising out of sleep. Kyo and Yuki's voices were a distant, comforting noise; she lay still and let the sound roll over her while awareness seeped in.

The bed was warm and soft. Her cramps were gone. Her head… felt a little… too big? Bruised? Not a headache, yet, but something to move carefully with. She was thirsty. She wondered what the boys were talking about. An unstoppable yawn welled up and with it, she opened her eyes.

She felt her smile moments before actually recognizing what she saw: Kyo at the foot of the bed, trying to move quietly to her side. A steaming cup of tea in his hand. And behind him, in the doorway…

"You're up," Kyo said. "Unless I woke you." Then he looked over his shoulder, said, "Come on in," and Yuki entered.

Her body didn't mind sitting up despite the odd fizziness settling into her veins, but shaking her head still felt like a bad idea, so she just said, "You didn't." She took the cup he held out to her and inhaled deeply— chamomile— before taking a careful sip; almost instantly her general unwellness faded somewhat. "Thank you."

"Sure. I just brought it to you, though. This guy—" he jabbed his thumb at Yuki, now standing beside him, "made it."

Yuki nodded, cheeks slightly pink.

"Thank you too, Yuki-kun."

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

"Oh, much better! Thank you for—" Memory flashed over her then, everything that had happened from when she stopped on Yuki's doorstep; she cut herself off with another sip. "...I'm so sorry I worried you."

"No, please," he said, stepping forward, "I'm sorry you were in such pain. And I'm glad you're feeling better."

He was close enough for her to reach for his hand. She didn't. "This will help," she said into the teacup. "It's been a while since I had chamomile."

"I forgot it was in there, to be honest." Kyo, laughing drily, scratched the back of his neck.

She smiled at him. "I bought too many boxes last week. I suppose that was some kind of premonition," she said to Yuki. Then she finished her tea and set it aside, stretching her arms above her head.

Kyo made a noise. "You sure you're ready to get out of bed?"

A giggle left her; her reaction to how did he know-of course he knows. "I think I'd like some air." She slid carefully out from the covers and straightened her dress, a brief blush passing over her as she did.

She walked past the boys in bare feet–that's right, Kyo had removed her shoes–and left the room, making her way to the small balcony off the living area. In her peripheral vision, Yuki went toward the kitchen with her teacup.

Outside, the sky was darker now, a light breeze scented with the promise of rain soothing her too-warm skin. It was easier to breathe out here, and the headache threatening at the back of her skull receded with each inhale. Had it been like this when she got back home? She could only remember Yuki picking her up when the pain made it impossible for her to stand, let alone walk. She had leaned into his chest and shut her eyes, listening to his heartbeat, part of her worried over his lungs with the spring pollen. But his breathing stayed strong the whole way back, and his grip on her had never wavered. His body heat had calmed her chills.

He had kissed her. She remembered that, too.

"Hey, you."

Kyo was so quiet. How long had he been out here? She half-turned, a smile getting halfway out. "Hi."

Eyes warm, he put his hands on her shoulders. He gazed out at the sky as he spoke. "You wanna talk to him alone? He told me what happened when you visited him. I… didn't tell him anything back."

"I thought he might." Looking up at him, she leaned back against him, laying her hands over his. "That's a good plan, I think. He might be very confused." And she laughed quietly, even though the situation wasn't (that) funny.

"Okay. You can come find me when you're done."

She nodded; he stepped away. "Wait, Kyo-kun."

At the threshold, he turned back to her, one eyebrow raised.

"Kiss," she said, reaching for him.

Smiling, Kyo caught her up and leaned to meet her lips.

She kissed him hard, delighting in the gently surprised noise he made, but pulled away regretfully when his tongue flickered along her lips. I love you. "I love you so much."

"Love you too, baby."

In the few minutes she was alone again on the balcony, Tohru thought about what to say and how to say it. She hadn't planned every word but she'd had a plan, and the cramps and everything else had disrupted it.

She was still thinking when Yuki walked onto the balcony next to her and said, "Kyo told me you want to speak with me."

She glanced at him, her hands coming to rest on the balcony railing. "Yes."

Time to do, not just think. Was he nervous? Anticipatory? Hopeful? She was. All three and more.

"Earlier today," she began, "I meant it when I said it was fine, when you kissed me. It was fine because of what I came by to talk to you about before… I got my period." This last part was mumbled; she didn't know yet Yuki's comfort level with talking out in the open about menstruation, and for all her (hard-won) ease with the topic, it still felt strange to say aloud to someone who wasn't Kyo, or Machi, or Saki or Arisa.

She kept going. "There isn't an easy way to say this, so… So I'll just say it. Yuki." A lump rose in her throat, a sharp ache, just from saying his name. Crying wouldn't do. She got hold of her emotions and tried again. "I care for you so, so very much. Kyo does too. We have for a long time now, and I know you care for us." The weight of what she'd waited to say for so long settled over her, a tingle at the base of her spine; she breathed in and out, wet her dry lips, tried to make herself look at Yuki and found she couldn't move. "And so, for the past couple of weeks we've been talking about… us. About you, and me, and him, a-a-and— Well, at first I felt guilty, and greedy, and I didn't know what to do so I hid it." She smiled briefly. "Kyo knows me well enough that I can't hide how I'm feeling from him for long, though. I thought he might be upset. But he'd been going through the same confusion I had, and then we talked, and talking made us realize that both of us had… we have… feelings for you."

Her hand had moved closer to Yuki's on the railing, she noticed suddenly; they were pressed close now, her pinky grazing his thumb. She wondered if he felt hers shaking. "Oh, Yuki, we love you." The words propelled her; she took a breath, turning her gaze from their hands to his face, warmth high in her chest. "I love you, Yuki. I want to be with both of you, I want you to be with both of us, because in every future I can imagine all three of us are there, always. No matter the feelings among us."

He blinked a few times, mouth parted. His hand didn't move from hers.

"S-So." She moved first. She had to look away, gripping the railing more tightly; her knees felt weak all of a sudden. "Th-That's what I wanted to tell you when I– when I came to s-see you today."

In the silence, she tried and failed to count her heartbeats. She'd done it, she'd done it, she'd done it, felt stripped raw and unbearably alive but what if she was wrong—

"Well. It sounded easy enough from here."

How she felt about Yuki's eyes was the opposite of how Kyo's eyes made her feel. Sometimes it was unnerving how much she could read in them. He had been closed off to her for so long, able to hide his true feelings far behind his irises, in princely smiles. It was better that he no longer did it, of course it was, she was proud that he'd found the courage; there were times, though, that the depth of feeling in them could overwhelm her.

Maybe after this moment, she wouldn't be overwhelmed anymore.

His steady voice, so ambiguous, made her look into his eyes, and he didn't look away. Happiness, relief, love; Yuki's eyes reflected all she felt for him and about him. And they were like magnets: she stumble-stepped toward him, hands coming to rest against his chest, even though he hadn't said anything, even though she should wait—

"I really… I never imagined I would hear something like that. Is this a dream?"

She couldn't help herself; her hands rose to touch his face, thumbs swiping gently at his tears. "I hope not," she said, her own eyes stinging, "because if you're dreaming then so am I."

He smiled like a summer sunrise, then leaned down until his forehead touched hers. "I love you," he whispered. "And I love Kyo. More than I ever thought I could. I want to be with you both."

"Oh…!" Tears slipped from her closed eyelids. "Oh, good. I'm— I'm so—" She was laughing and crying, and she put her hands behind his neck, and she pulled his mouth down to hers.

From somewhere very far away, she heard rainfall begin. She felt a light spray, carried by a gust of wind. All of it was eclipsed by Yuki's lips moving against hers, by his hair between her fingers, by his hands at her back pulling her into him.

Then she was laughing again, the kiss broken as he swung her into his arms, into a princess carry, just like before. "It's a thunderstorm," he said, laughing too, thunder rumbling above them just then. "Let's go in."

With the overhang keeping them dry— no, even in the pouring rain— Tohru could have kissed him forever. But she wanted to see Kyo equally badly. And so she looped her arms around his neck, and he carried her back inside, right to Kyo sitting on the couch, where he sat down too.

Dizzy with feeling, she let herself fall back into Kyo's lap, her legs stretching across Yuki. "Kyo-kun, Kyo-kun," she sang, smiling so wide it almost hurt. "I told him."

An impossibly soft smile rested on his face. "You told him, huh?"

"I told him!"

"She did." Yuki was smiling too.

"And!" It was a squeak; her feet wiggled with giddiness. "And I kissed him, I hope you don't mind, and, and so…"

"Oh, I don't blame you." He ran a hand through her hair, smiling wider. "Would've done the same thing if I were you. Well." He turned, eyes meeting Yuki's. His hand left her hair to touch his cheek. "Guess it's my turn."

Yuki closed his eyes, leaning in.

She watched them. Watched Kyo take hold of Yuki's face with both hands, fingers pressing into his jawline, like he never wanted to let him go. Watched Yuki lean into Kyo, fitting so perfectly, one of his hands clutching Kyo's shirt; the other was slack and shaking over her ankles. So she took his hand with both of hers and held it on her belly, not because she was in pain (blissfully, she wasn't at all) but because she needed something to hold her down lest she float away from pure joy.

It wasn't long before they pulled back, their foreheads touching like hers and Yuki's had been minutes before. Kyo's hand covered hers holding Yuki's (and Yuki gripped hers so very tightly), and he said, "Sorry we kept you waiting."

Yuki laughed, or maybe it was a sob, and he put his arm around Kyo's shoulders, pulling in. "Please treat me kindly."

Tohru would have laughed if she weren't already stunningly full of emotion.

As it was, Kyo did for her, snickering and hugging him back. "I'll do my best," he said solemnly.

That broke her, had her laughing until her stomach hurt in a good way, until she needed a tissue to wipe away (more) happy tears. After that she returned to the couch and wedged between them, their hands finding hers as they'd done for years. Except…

Except now they were all walking together on a new path, with so much to see and with so much time to explore, even as her mind thrummed with impatience to start right that instant. She settled that impatience minutely by kissing Yuki's cheek and then Kyo's. And when they returned her kisses in perfect sync– why, she would have melted into the couch if they weren't all pressed together, unmoving.

She wondered if her eyes looked as bright to them as theirs did to her.

[elriell]

One thing I've seen a few times, which I just cannot understand, is the people who ship Gwyn and Azriel suggesting that Az's response to Cassian asking him if he wants children, "It doesn't matter what I want," means that he hasn't thought of children for himself, because:

He doesn't consider himself worthy or deserving of kids, or

He thinks he would taint them with his touch/self

They are (very nearly) always pro him and Gwyn having children, though. She has "pliant bones," after all 🤢🤮 >>>🤚🏻here's my sarcasm hand, just in case that wasn't clear - that actually hurt to type.

I only ever see - but I could have missed it, of course - people who defend Elain's worth suggesting that Az might not even want kids, regardless of his relationship status. I know a couple of men, IRL, who had issues with their fathers growing up (nothing nearly as insane as Azriel, to be clear), who don't want to become fathers themselves for this reason.

Of course, he might secretly want a family, even if he doesn't let himself dream; we don't know, can't know, because we've only been inside his head for one single bonus chapter.

HOWthef*ckEVER!

When asked to apply their own logic to Azriel's thought that he "hadn't got that far with his planning, certainly not beyond the fantasies he pleasured himself to" (regarding Elain), then all of a sudden he has no interest in a future with her; nope, he clearly doesn't want her for anything more than sex.

It couldn't possibly be that he hasn't let himself think of a future with Elain, because:

Az doesn't consider himself worthy or deserving, of either Elain or love - and if this is the case, he must be toxic 🤚🏻

Az thinks his touching her skin would be "sacrilege," and that he would "taint" Elain with his presence - and if this is the case, he must be toxic 🤚🏻

Az's self-protecting comment regarding kids couldn't possibly be because it was setting up an answer in his bonus chapter.

Ship whomever you want, just please, be consistent with your interpretation of the text, and try to recognise your own inherent bias.

That got longer than I intended... sorry! You have so much patience for this fandom, I'm in awe.

- N

I just want to slow clap it out to this ask to be honest ♥♥♥ Because yes to everything, I don’t even know what to add or say. Yes, obviously ship what you want, love what you love, but like we’ve discussed in this fandom some lines are so blurred lately (exp; pliant bones/elains) that it becomes a little troubling.

And I don’t disagree the is a lot of inconsistencies in people thought process’ but I have given up trying to untangle other peoples trains of thought. 

I definitely think that I interpret it as he has not thought that far ahead because he wont let himself, he won’t allow his thoughts to stray so far and believe he could be with her. Please no apologies needed, I don’t mind at all.

I try my best to keep a clear head and a steady mind, but I have been here a while so it is mostly down to practice ahaha 

[inkykeiji]

My bad, let's just use "nii-chan" instead. Can't have both your mans mad about eachother.

If reading through my tags, helps you cope even a little, it's totally okay, doll.

Don't worry about oversharing as long as you feel comfortable.

- Dabi, Touya.

it’s okay!!!! ahahahah no we definitely cannot have that, then babie clari would be very sad :( but yeah he’s good with literally anything else except that

i think i might!!!! rereading your old asks always makes me smile n giggle n stuff 🥺🥺

i actually feel very comfortable with you and this blog in general!!! it’s YOU feeling uncomfortable that i’m worried about.

tw clari being dumb and entitled under the cut

idk i just feel ??? disappointed in myself i guess?? or annoyed with myself?? i feel like i’m not doing enough esp in terms of this blog. i feel like i should be working faster and should be more consistent with how regularly i post stuff idk but then when i’m writing i’m really happy and excited because i cannot wait to share it!!! but then i’m reminded of this disappointment again, and the whole cycle repeats, and then i feel silly for being disappointed because christ it’s mf tumblr yk??? but my work really does mean so much to me like those stories are my BABIES, i love them so much, i worked so hard on them. i’ve also been going through intense bouts of imposter syndrome but that’s normal for any creator. idk idk idk it all sounds very stupid and privileged to me, i think i’m just being a literal crybaby. but i’m pissed, because all of these stupid feelings only hinder my workflow even MORE.

and i do not expect you to have advice or answers of course, i’d never ever expect that from anyone ahaha especially a character anon! i feel bad ranting tbh but that’s really all this is, i just kinda wanted to rant to someone who cares (???) and have someone listen. so thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for listening to me be an actual brat lmao

and then on top of everything wesley’s eye is swelling and idk why and emergency vets are SO expensive; i really don’t have the money to spare if he doesn’t absolutely need to go to emerg. i’m keeping a very close eye on him and just hoping the swelling doesn’t get worse and that he can tough it out through the night so i can get him to our regular vet tomorrow