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the things we lost to the ice
It didn't quite sink in until Gunter put on the crown and became an Ice... something that it was all over. He was back as himself, with his body and brain and awkward personality, permanently. It didn't feel like last time, like each breath was bringing him closer to his last. Simon was also somehow back in his old favorite suit, with its worn elbows and his glasses clean and unbroken. He even couldn't feel the crown whispering in the back of his mind anymore. It was as GOLB had taken him back to just moments before he'd worn the crown for the first time, intending to tease Betty.
Oh Betty.
"Hey so uh, who are you?" Simon looked up from the rock Marcy had set him on to see Flame Princess staring at him curiously. Right she was... literally made of fire. He knew that, Simon blinked. Wait he did actually, his brain retained lots of facts about Ooo and it's people. It was his or, well, Ice King's personal experiences that felt fuzzy. "Because you came out of the GOLB thing together with Finn but I've never seen you before. Marceline seemed to know you though." She tilted her head and frowned, "Finn told me he was the last human, was that another lie?"
"Get away from him!" He heard Marcy screech as she rocketed over from where she'd been talking to Bubblegum and some other candy people. Her arm wrapped protectively around him, her sharp nails digging into his clothes and her batlike face pressed against his own. Her skin was cold like death. He hated how he tensed with instinctual fear at having a predator so close. This was his Marcy, his precious little girl. She was different than he remembered but she loved him, she wouldn't hurt him. He clenched his fists so they didn't shake.
"Hey Marcy! Don't worry, F.P. is cool!" Finn shouted, galloping over with a big grin on his face. "Oh man, so much just happened but Simon are you back-back, like for realsies? That is so math!" Finn hug tackled him and Marcy.
"Still waiting on an explanation," Flame Princess grumbled.
"So she actually got you free, how joyous," Magic Man -no, Normal Man- said with a small smile but his eyes were sharp. "I suppose the power of GOLB is the only thing strong enough to undo elemental wish magic. Congratulations, Ice King, welcome back to reality."
"Wait Ice King?" Flame Princess gaped and Simon realized that -with the major world ending threat neutralized - they were now the center of attention. It's only just occurring to him that his window to divorce himself completely from Ice King and pretend he was someone else was about to close forever. Just like the chance to hold Betty in his arms again.
"Yea!" Finn explained, wrenching around to address Flame Princess and gagging Simon by putting him in a headlock. "It's a long story -seriously long, he's like over a thousand years old or something- but Simon put on the crown only he didn't know it was hecka cursed. It possessed him and piloted his body like a meat puppet, turning him into Ice King and made him act all Banaynay."
"It took him a while for him to become Ice King though," Marcy said, shifting Simon slightly out of Finn's grip so she was hugging him from behind with her chin propped on his head. "He rescued me when I little before I was bit by the Vampire King. Simon took care of me after the world ended, he even showed me the basics of playing guitar." She nuzzled him and gave him a gentle squeeze, "I missed you so much, you have no idea."
"I missed you too, Sweet Girl," he murmured back. He'd been here the whole time but at the same time, been very far away. There's hazy memories of this older Marceline, her songs echoing somewhere in his head. Mostly he remembers her frowning over whatever crazy thing Ice King had been doing at the time.
"Whoa, you taught Marcy! I had no idea you were so musical," Finn shouted before looking thoughtful. "Well I guess IK used to play on his drums or his keyboard a lot now that I think about it." He smiled, a goofy teenage smile despite the missing teeth and scars from numerous adventures. "I guess you weren't totally gone."
"It doesn't justify the constant harassment and kidnapping of innocent Princesses," Bubblegum said primly.
"Bonnibel," Marcy growled.
"But I'm willing to forgive past grievances so long as it doesn't happen again. You are, after all, practically a new man." Bubblegum noted. "I presume it was born out of subconscious desire to find Betty again, the crown fixating on that desperation for love. Of course, Betty is gone now so it's all rather a moot point, isn't it?"
"Bonnie, seriously, now is not the time," Marcy warned. The fresh reminder of Betty's sacrifice, the permanence of it hit him again. Insanity had overwhelmed his depression and loneliness and loss of identity, redirected it. Now nothing could distract him from that sucking chest wound of loss threatening to consume him.
"Uhhh hey Simon!" Finn interrupted with a manic smile. "Can't wait to learn all about human stuff from you! I bet you can even teach the Islanders a thing or two, pretty sure they've forgotten what it's like to be human. But you know all sorts of humany stuff I bet. It's gonna be awesome learning where I come from." Good lord, was someone going to love and support this beautiful child or was it up to him again?
Finn reached out with his remaining hand and grabbed one of Simon's own, lacing them together. Simon jolted and looked at their conjoined hands before spreading their palms and fingers together. His pinky finger only met empty air.
"Oh my god Finn, have you only ever had four fingers?" He balked. Ice King's memories weren't that reliable, he couldn't actually recall.
"Don't you mean glob and uh yeah, that's the normal amount I think," Finn shrugged, squinting at Simon's pinky. "What do you need that extra one for anyhow? Does it have special powers or something?"
"Yeah, I always thought that was weird," Jake said from somewhere behind Finn. "Marcy has an extra one too, figured it was just how things were before the Mushroom War."
"It was actually a nuclear holocaust that wiped out pretty much all life on earth and mutated the rest beyond recognition but sure," Simon said with a hysterical edge in his voice as the weight of his situation pressed down on him.
He was a thousand years removed from the world he knew, a world that now only existed as ruins or twisted, funhouse mirror replicas. Simon was totally alone, the only person who remembered the way things were before. Marcy was here but she'd made the journey through time naturally, she'd adapted and likely forgotten. He no longer had magic and, without it, he wouldn't be allowed into Wizard City. The Ice Kingdom was now Gunter's and the humans of the future have changed in ways he could hardly recognize.
Sometimes the past is a different country, sometimes it's a black hole taking everything down with it.
"Hey dude, you've probably gotta use the bathroom like super bad," Jake said as he broke through the crowd. He gently manhandled Simon away from the well meaning arms of people who were both dear loved ones and strangers all at once. "You haven't whizzed as yourself in like a million years, we better find a place to get your man biz done."
"Wait but-" Marcy said reaching out but Bubblegum grabbed her hand and pulled her away. The rest of the onlookers slowly backed off, going back to the post fight cleanup. As Jake led him away, he made brief eye contact with Normal Man who'd once been a magical god and was now just a man. Simon would probably have out and out collapsed if Jake wasn't steadying him.
"Look, we're just gonna walk away and when we round this corner where no one can see, I'll leave you alone to do whatever you need to do." Jake soothed. "I can hold off Marcy and Finn for maybe 10 minutes, 12 tops. You focus on your breathing and if you gotta hurl, just do it, holding it in jacks you all up." He lowered Simon to the ground once they were out of sight. Simon immediately went into the fetal position.
"You're good at this," Simon noted even as the stress and panic and misery washed over him. He pushed his glasses up into his hair and buried his face in his knees. Jake rubbed his shoulders, it felt good, grounding.
"I've talked Finn through a lot of these episodes before, the kid's been through a lot. You have that in common. You and Finn might have some different physical traits but you're both human. You just had a lot of junk thrown at you so you don't need to figure it all out now. That's what the rest of your life is for. I'll keep the worry squad off your back as long as I can. Take it easy, Simon but, either way, you gotta take it."
Jake went back to the crowd leaving only his wisdom. He was right, no matter how miserable or overjoyed he was over the circumstances, this is the way the dice fell. He had no choice but to take it, to use Betty's sacrifice on his behalf to do whatever he wanted with his remaining time. And he was mortal now, time affected him once more so he had to learn quick.
He had no idea what he would do or even who this new Simon Petrikov, PhD student and aspiring antiquarian was. Just being able to think coherently and regulate his words and actions was a strange miracle he hadn't fully digested yet. Things would be okay, he would be happy once more but, for now, he thought it was okay to sit here in the dirt and cry for everything he'd lost to the ice.
#adventure time#simon petrikov#finn the human#marceline the vampire queen#its been so long since Ive done any writing this was fun#takes place like right after Come Along with Me#still thinking about simon coming to grips with being himself again and now he has to DEAL with all that baggage he didnt as IK#not to mention the rest of Ooo matching up IK with Simon#Jakes a good dude#also lol sometimes Finn is drawn with 5 fingers sometimes 4#I think its a fun nod to cartoon characters having 4 fingers but also an easy way to show that Finn and Simon are both humans but different#simon is also adopting him no take backsies#anyway here's a sad old man
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Baby Bumblebee chptr 4
////////Six Months Later\\\\\\\\\
Bee was walking home from school. Lennox and Ironhide were hunting down Decepticons in Europe, so he didn’t really have a ride today, which was fine. He didn’t mind not going back to the house when Lennox or Ironhide wasn’t there. It’s not that Bee didn’t like Sarah or Annabell, but they just didn’t really get each other. Annabell tried to poke at every nerve Bumblebee had, just testing his patience. And Sarah either babied him too much or acted as if he should already know how to do some complex human thing.
And then there was school. Apparently, Sarah was right about his name. Though Bee still didn’t understand how a girl in his class can be named ‘jasmine’ after a flower, but to be called after the insect that lets that flower grow and flourish… that’s taking it too weird? Not to mention no one in the institute knows morse code, and only a few, including his teacher know sign language. The school said they’d set him up with an interpreter. That has yet to be seen.
“Oh, hey, you’re Honey Bee, right?” Bumblebee jumped as a boy his physical age tapped him on the shoulder. Bee pulled out a small keyring of flash card that said common phrases to help him interact with people who couldn’t understand his other forms of communications. He tapped on the one with his actual name on it. “Oh, well I’m Raven.”
Bee made a saluting gesture; instead of his hand being horizontal and pushed in front of him, his palm was vertical and facing out while his hand moved away to the side of his temple. Then, Bee finger-spelt the boy’s name. Raven looked at his hands with wide eyes.
“Woah, you really can’t speak, can you?” Raven asked. Bee let out angry trills, glaring at the boy. He started to walk faster, getting away from the human. “No, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that!”
Bee chittered, turning around and raising an eyebrow. You have one chance.
“I just didn’t want to believe Harvey. He’s always making up things about other people. My mom says he’s a bully.” Raven rambled. Bee nodded in agreement. Harvey was a larger kid in his class who kept trying to pick fights and make fun of Bumblebee. Bee would hand the kid’s ass to him, but he was still an Autobots and harming humans was still a big ‘no’ in his books. “We should be friends. I see you like Voltron. My favorite is the red lion, but the yellow one is alright too.”
Bumblebee shrugged, not knowing what this ‘Voltron’ was, but decided not to try to confuse the other with too complex interactions. This is the most pleasant conversation he’s had since being forced to partake in the human learning institution.
Soon Raven had to split off to go to his own home, but made Bee promise to meet up tomorrow to walk to school. Bee felt lighter for some reason, almost like he wasn’t so alone. Annabell picked up on his good mood as soon as he entered the house. A toy sailed through the air and whacked him in the forehead.
“Hey, Bee.” She smiled.
“Annabell, stop throwing toys. Go sit in the corner.” Sarah gawked. This turned into a ten minute scream-cry feast in which Annabell was forced to spend time in the corner for longer than her original sentence. Bumblebee was already set up at the table by this point, pulling out his homework. “How was school, Bee?” The woman said as she signed the words.
‘Good, I meet a new friend. His name is Raven.’ Bee signed, his feet kicking in the open air under the table.
“Oh, that’s nice, what did you guys talk about?” Sarah leaned over the counter, ruffling Bee’s hair. He huffed and waved her hand away.
‘He kept talking about some lion-show called Voltage or something? Said I liked it too, but I don’t know why he would think that.’
“You mean Voltron? Your bookbag is designed to look like one of the characters on the show. He probably thought you got the bag because you liked the show, not because it was yellow and black.” She explained, lifting up the bag in question. On the back in vinyl letters did read ‘Voltron’. “We could watch it. So you know what your friend is talking about.”
Bee shrugged at this. He’s tried to watch human entertainment, but nothing really caught his interest. Well, he’s only really seen whatever the Witwicky’s watched, and that was just through their living room window as he was parked in their driveway. Recently, Annabell has been making him watch her shows, which were all about learning numbers, colors, and being nice. At least she has her numbers and colors down.
“Yeah, it can be our thing, when you’re done with your homework we can watch a few episodes.” Sarah nodded to herself.
Annabell was returned from her sentencing. She shuffled up to Bumblebee, holding out the wooden block that she had thrown at him earlier.
“M’sorry, Bee.” She toed at the ground and gave him large puppy dog eyes. Bee huffed and took the block from her. He’s learned pretty fast to accept her peace offerings or have her throw another tantrum.
‘Yeah, I’m sure you are.’ Bee signed back. Annabell jumped around to her mom.
“Mom, what did he say?” Sarah shook her head at the young autobot. “He said, ‘apology accepted’.”
It didn’t take long to finish the easy equations or sentence structures his teachers assigned for his class. As soon as he put his work back into his bag, Sarah ushered him onto the couch and turned on their television.
“Get comfortable, sweetie, the first episode is the longest.” Bee wrapped himself in the yellow blanket that he’s since claimed as his own. As the episode went on, Bee found himself drawing parallels of his own life and the autobots to those of these characters. He was so immersed into this stupid cartoon that he didn’t even notice that Lennox had arrived and sat down next to his wife. Not until the episode was paused.
‘HEY!’ Bumblebee turned to Sarah, jumping a little when Lennox was also there.
“Hey to you too, kid.” Lennox said, his voice thick and his face contorted into worry. Bumblebee sat up.
‘Is Ironhide okay?’ Bee signed, trying to twist out of his cocoon to get a better look outside for the mech.
“He’s fine, Bee. But I do have some bad news. The Decepticons found the base. The Autobots had to be relocated and for your safety, we might not be getting their new location.”
‘But what about Ironhide? He still needs Energon to function. How will I find them once we’ve figured out how to change me back?’ Bee asked.
“They don’t think there’s a cure for you, Bee. Optimus thought it best to cut ties. Don’t worry about Ironhide. We’re still going to get shipments of Energon for him.” Lennox pulled Bee into his chest. Bee didn’t have room to sign his frustrations, but he also didn’t have energy to fight off his prison of warm arms. Instead he let Lennox’s voice swirl around his own thoughts that wanted to drown him.
_______________
Bee slipped out of the house. The moon, street lamps, and his blinking shoe steps were his only light to navigate out of the neighborhood and try to find his way back to Optimus. The mech might not want him, but that was where he belonged, and he wasn’t going to take no for an answer.
It wasn’t the first time that he realized that walking was much more time consuming than driving. This was just another time that the notion ingrained itself into his head. This was the first time Bumblebee found himself walking for a long time after sunset. It seemed to take longer in the dark. It took so much longer to reach the school than it usually does.
Maybe it wasn’t the darkness of night that had Bumblebee shuffling his feet. Maybe it was the thought of seeing Optimus and the others after a month of not seeing them. Maybe it was the knowledge that this was in direct opposition of Optimus’s orders. This is the most rebellious he’s been in a long time. Bumblebee finds his feet stopping. He looks around and realizes he’s walked himself all the way just a house past Sam’s. The chill has already settled into his skin, but he’s just noticed his minutely shivers. His teeth are chattering, and he feels tired seeping into the very marrow of his human bones. His feet and legs ache. It must have been half the night gone by now.
A rumbling sound brings the rest of the world back into focus. Cars race towards him, screeching to a halt and boxing him in. At first he thinks its normal bad humans, until he recognizes the cars and notices the Decepticons’ insignias.
“I don’t get it.” Starscream’s voice is audible from his vehicular mode. “There is but a human child where the signal emits. No energon, no Autobots. Nothing.”
Bumblebee’s heart spikes. He backs away from Megatron’s right-hand. The other ‘Cons have switched back to their natural state. They leer down at Bumblebee. One even tries to grab at him. He rolls to the side, and books it for a crack in their formation. Breakdown snagged Bee’s leg, scooping him upside-down, before he could make it. Bee kept hissing and sputtering at the Cons, but they weren’t intimidated.
“It appears, Starscream, that the boy is the origin of the signal. Maybe Knockout’s weapon wasn’t as defective as we had first thought. This human child does have a striking resemblance to their mute scout.” Breakdown muses.
Bee lets out sharp whistles, hoping the sleeping humans around them will awaken, but its almost no use. His vision starts to blur as the Cons start moving away. He doesn’t know what to do. He starts pushing against the metal fist around his leg, but with each shove the only result is his palms getting hotter.
Bumblebee can feel in his gut that Breakdown is about to shift. He can hear the t-cog clicking its gears in the split second preparation of turning into the alt mode. Bee panics, pulling his arm as far back as he could and smacking hard onto Breakdown’s grip. Instead of being halted by the warm living metal, his hand pushed in with no resistance. A shot of blue energy cut a path from his hand to the open sky. Breakdown drops Bee on the ground in surprise. Bee is able to twist himself to land on his back rather than just his head. He ignores the searing pain of smacking into the asphalt and scrambles away from his capture. The other Cons make a quick double-back, but not before Bee is on his feet. His palms and fingers tingle from the heat, but are unharmed from the powerful blast-ray. Cons surround him. He pulls his arm back and lets out another blast, sweeping his arm in an arc and taking out a line of the enemies, and also some of the residential appliances.
“Bee?” It’s Sam’s voice as he scampers out of his house in a shirt and boxers. “Where’s Lennox? Why are you here?” Bee doesn’t answer. He can’t answer. He sidesteps a blast from the Cons. Its not enough, Bee is grabbed again. His arms are pinned to his side in Starscream’s hand.
“I’ve got him, retreat.” Starscream proclaimed, ignoring Bee’s chitters and Sam’s shouts. A ground bridge was opened a few feet away. Starscream watched his men walk into the portal before turning to Sam with a viscous grin. “Till the next time, Witwick-”
Bee was once again hitting the ground. His back is singing and his ears are ringing from the gunshot. His vision is blurry, but he can still make out Mikaela cocking back a rifle as Sam ran to him. Sam carefully moved Bee away from the Decepticon, who was clutching his shot-up hand. There was a moment where it looked like Starscream was going to exact revenge. Luckily the portal behind him started to close and if he wanted a ride back home he couldn’t fight the humans. Everyone sighed with relief until they looked down at Bee.
The worried shouts of his friends were cut short as Bee’s small body finally gave it quits and fell asleep.
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With Great Power - Chapter 5
Title: With Great Power – Chapter 5
Catch up (or read on AO3) here!
Fic summary: Thomas Sanders is just a regular social media personality. But when he gets bit by a spider during filming one of his YouTube videos, his whole life is about to turn upside down—whether he (or the aspects of his personality) want it to or not. Platonic LAMP/CALM + Character!Thomas. Spider-Man AU.
Chapter word count: 3,515
Chapter warnings: cursing, nightmare mention, anxiety mention, minor spoilers for Danny Phantom.
A/N: Almost a month later, here’s chapter 5! So sorry for the delay. I hope you enjoy it! <3 Shoutout to @creativenostalgiastuff for her help as always. Edited by yours truly so all mistakes are mine.
Tags: @captain-loki-xavier, @human-dictionary, @the-peculiar-bi-tch, @mining-pup, @band-be-boss-blog, @asexual-trashbag, @samathekittycat, @why-should-i-tell-youu2, @theobsessor1, @always3charcoaltea, @changeling-ash, @logical-princey, @crimsonshadow323, @flickering-raven, @smokeyrutilequartz, @dontbugmeimantisocial, @liz-a-bell, @black-king-white-knight, @soijusthavetoask, @analogical-mess, @marvelfangeek09, @vigilantvirgil, @princelogical
Sorry for the delay, everyone! Thomas types out for Twitter, a couple days later. Wasn’t feeling great but we’re back at it! New CT coming to you soon!
He pauses, then looks up at Joan across from him, sitting on a chair in Picani’s office. “Hey, what if we did a livestream tomorrow?”
He still feels bad for having gone MIA for a week. Or, as MIA as Thomas ever really went. He’d texted Joan, Camden, and Talyn basically every day to tell them he still wasn’t feeling his best. It wasn’t… a total lie, he’d told himself despite the guilt that sat uncomfortably in his stomach. It definitely hadn’t helped that he’d consequentially been postponing finishing up the filming of Cartoon Therapy due to his absence. It had been a couple of weeks now without any video to post on either channel.
Joan looks up from laptop poised across their lap. “Uh, I can do that. As long as it ends before 6, ‘cause my piano lesson starts at 6:30.”
Thomas smiles. “Perfect. I just feel bad for making them wait, y’know?” To make up for it, he adds to the tweet, we’ll be having a Livestream tomorrow at 4! Open to everyone, not just members. Hope to see you all there!
“You can’t help that you got sick,” Joan replies as Thomas sends the tweet out. “They understand.”
“Yeah, but… y’know.” Thomas lifts a shoulder. “I just wanna do something for them.”
“It’s cool, man,” Joan replies. “I think it’s a good idea. And it’ll give us a nice break from the editing and shit.”
“Speaking of—” Thomas grabs the pen and journal prompts from the bookcase behind him—"how’s Camden handling his part of things? I haven’t talked to him about the vid in a while.”
“I think he’s almost done,” Joan replies. “We just gotta finish the last of Picani and we should have the rest of the footage he needs to finish his section.”
Thomas nods and adjusts the knot in the pastel green tie around his neck. It had seemed like every time they’d tried to film the rest of Picani, something got in the way. Thomas loved acting and he loved the filming stage of videos, but a small part of him just wanted to be done with it. The sooner he could be done filming, the sooner he could focus on… more pressing issues.
“Then let’s finish Picani,” Thomas says lightly. “We’ve just got the last scene with Valerie’s character, right?”
Joan nods. “Yep. Shouldn’t take long at all.”
“Awesome.” Thomas glances in the viewfinder and pushes the bangs that were falling into his eyes out of the way. “Ready when you are.”
Joan hits record on the camera, then looks down at their script. “I have to be the adult, y’know?”
Thomas taps his pen against his mouth, looking carefully at Valerie’s sightline. “You know, Elena… Danny’s older sister feels that way for much of the show, too.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, Jazz is only a couple of years older than Danny. But she often feels like she has to be the adult in the family because she sees her parents as a bit… immature.” Thomas leans forward slightly. “So she acts way older than she really is. But that mentality ends up backfiring on her when she takes it a little too far.”
“Too far?”
Thomas places his pen on top of his journal in his lap. “In Season 2 Epsiode 7, Danny has to fight a ghost that can only be seen by kids while he’s on vacation with his family. Since Jazz acts and thinks of herself as an adult even though she’s only 16, she can’t see the ghost and starts to think—along with her parents—that Danny is going crazy.” Thomas pauses, remembering that they’d wanted to cut in with a video clip there. Then he continues. “Though her concern is well-intentioned, it leads her to trapping Danny and the ghost goes after their parents. It’s not until Danny is able to get Jazz to act like a kid again that she’s able to see the ghost, and ultimately help to save her family.”
Joan rolls their eyes to keep in character as they read Valerie’s lines. “Fine, but my family’s not under attack by ghosts.”
Thomas sighs. “You’re right. But the point is that Jazz thought acting like an adult was helping the people around her, when it really wasn’t. When she actually started acting her age was when she was able to be the most help—especially to her little brother, who was the whole reason she’d been acting so much older in the first place.”
“Huh…”
“From that point on,” Thomas continues, “Jazz tries to find a balance. She’s a mature person, and nobody was asking her to change that. But she also comes to understand the importance of still being a kid. She learns how to balance the two in a way that doesn’t ask her to sacrifice any part of who she is.”
Joan pauses. “I… guess I could try that. Maria isn’t a little kid anymore, even though I still think of her as my baby sister.”
Thomas gives a small, encouraging smile. “It’ll take some time. Learning balance is not as easy as flipping a switch. But it’s something we can continue to work on. It might even help your relationship with your sister in ways you don’t expect.”
Joan gives a single nod. “I’d like that.”
“Great!” Thomas grins. “So I’ll see you next week?”
“Definitely. And… thanks, Dr. Picani.”
“Any time, Elena.”
…
“We can tell them. Should we tell them? We can tell them. I think. Wait…”
Thomas laughs as Joan stumbles through their thoughts about half an hour in to the livestream. He laughs even harder when he sees the chat blowing up with people asking Joan to just say it already. They’d decided to go back to Thomas’s apartment for the livestream, if only for sake of tradition. Not every livestream had been from this location, but Thomas wanted some of the normalcy back. And Joan, though they’d seemed puzzled, didn’t appear to mind.
“I’m good to tell them who it is,” Thomas says.
“Wait, who as in the…” Joan arches an eyebrow. “Or…” They tilt their head. Perhaps strangely enough, Thomas knows exactly what they’re asking.
He laughs again. “Real name, not the character name.”
“Yeah, okay. That’s what I was thinking.” Thomas and Joan both look back at the camera.
“It’s Valerie,” Thomas says. “The new character we’re introducing is played by my friend, Valerie. Some of you probably know her, since she’s been in… a good number of our videos. We got really lucky that the schedules worked out, since she’s auditioning in Orlando at the moment.”
“Yeah, she’s actually been in a lot,” Joan says. They start counting on their fingers. “Reasons to Smile.”
“On the Spot in the Spotlight,” Thomas supplies. “Which we’re still planning on bringing back.”
“The first Tongue Twisted.” Joan snaps their fingers and points at him. “She’s been in a few of your shorts videos, too.”
“I feel like we’re missing something.” Thomas glances at the chat and smiles at the people shouting SANDERS SIDES in all caps. “That’s right! Goodness gracious, she was in two of the Sanders Sides videos.” He shakes his head. “Sorry, guys. Guess I’m still a little out of it.”
He manages a small, apologetic smile. But a moment later, there’s a flood of messages in the chat telling him not to worry, asking if he’s feeling better, reminding him to rest and drink water… he feels a sharp twist of guilt. He tries not to linger on it.
“Let’s see… other questions….” He watches the chat closely, the knot in his stomach loosening slightly as the messages filter from well wishes to questions again. One of them makes him frown. “Someone’s asking if I’ve seen the Ekko videos?” He glances over his shoulder towards Joan. “I haven’t. Is that a new thing? I don’t know if I’ve heard of them.”
Joan looks suddenly uncomfortable. They shrug, but its awkward and forced. “Yeah. It was all anyone was talking about a couple days ago.”
Thomas hadn’t been checking social media over the past week. A part of him felt relieved that they’d at least moved on from trying to identify who “Spider-Man” was. “What are they?”
Joan gives him a quick look. “I’ll… tell you after the livestream.” Thomas couldn’t quite read their expression, but there was a warning look in their eyes that made him nod his agreement. Whatever it was, Joan didn’t want to talk about it with an audience. They wanted to change the subject.
At Thomas’s nod, Joan leans forward to read the scrolling chat feed until they find a different question. Thomas glances at the screen as well, and sees a few questions with “Spider-Man” in them—they go too fast for him to identify what exactly they’re asking—and feels himself tense. Joan doesn’t seem to even notice the questions.
“Here’s one,” they say after a brief pause. “Thomas, if you could be any kitchen appliance, what would you be?”
As the livestream continues, Thomas finds himself falling into old, comforting habits. He’d always had fun doing livestreams, especially ones with Joan. He appreciated their ability to be thoughtful and intellectual one moment and crack a joke that would make Thomas’s stomach hurt from laughing the next. A part of him feels like he appreciates it now more than ever. Joan is his best friend, and he can tell them anything.
Well… almost.
The idea of telling them about the recent… abilities Thomas had come to acquire made his stomach squirm and his heartbeat quicken. He couldn’t quite explain why. Joan would probably be skeptical—even Thomas hadn’t believed it at first—but the powers were something he could prove, a voice that sounded an awful lot like Logan reminded him. He’d been proving his abilities to himself all week, after all. Maybe he knew there was a chance that Joan would freak out and never talk to him again. They wouldn’t do that. The thought sounds like Patton.
Even so, something whispers safer to not tell them in the back of his mind, and Thomas can’t help but believe it.
“I gotta go soon,” Joan says. They look at Thomas. “Should we end with Mind Meld or something?”
Thomas pushes his bangs out of his eyes. He smiles. “Yeah, let’s do it.” Thomas pauses, thinking of his first word. “Okay. Ready?”
“Yeah.”
“3. 2. 1. Giant,” Thomas chimes at the same time that Joan says, “Apple.”
Thomas laughs. “Giant and apple?” He makes a face. “I don’t even know where to go with that.”
Joan grins in amusement, then thinks. “Okay. I think I have one. Super and apple.”
Thomas stares at them in uncertainty before he gets an idea. “Okay. I do too. It’s kinda weird, though.”
“3. 2. 1. Honeycrisp,” Joan says at the same time Thomas spits out, “New York.”
“I was thinking like, a giant apple. New York?” Joan laughs. It makes Thomas laugh too.
“I was thinking like, ‘giant as in ‘big’ and then—”
“And then you went to Big Apple,” Joan finishes. “Okay. I kind of get that. Honeycrisp and New York. Uh.”
Thomas’s eyes widen as he frantically tries to think of some sort of connection before one occurs to him. “Okay! I think I got one. It’s… broad-ish?”
“Broadish?” Joan starts laughing again. “That’s very helpful.”
“Okay, like,” Thomas waves a hand. “Kinda broad.”
Joan furrows their brow before shrugging. “What the heck. 3. 2. 1.”
Thomas says ‘vendor’ and Joan says ‘food’. It takes another round before they both eventually end up saying ‘restaurant’. Thomas grins when they finally get there. He looks back at the camera.
“Took us a minute but we got there! Thanks for sticking around, guys. This was a lot of fun. Super glad we had the chance to do this.” He glances at the chat, laughing at all the reactions of people playing along. In the midst of the messages—some of them now transitioning to sweet goodbyes—he sees one that catches his eye.
oof after that ekko vid I could use a new reasons to smile
Something uncomfortable sits in Thomas’s chest, but he flashes a quick smile at the camera. “Love you all! Bye!”
He stops the livestream and closes his laptop. Joan sits back in their chair, the spark of amusement from the game of mind meld fades out of their eyes. He’s reminded suddenly of the solemn, uncomfortable look Joan had given him when he’d asked during the livestream about whatever the ‘Ekko video’ was about.
“I saw that message. I know what you’re thinking,” Joan chimes in quietly after a moment. “It’s… not something you really wanna watch, dude. Trust me.”
“Why?”
Joan sighs and reaches for their water bottle. “It’s just… this thing that freaked everyone out. I don’t know how to explain it, but Talyn had nightmares after they watched it.” They take a drink. “I think it’s just someone trying to get some attention. The best thing to do is probably not to give it to them, y’know?”
Thomas nods absently as Joan pushes back from the table and heads towards the kitchen. Talyn didn’t really spook easily. They played horror games for fun in the dark alone. Thomas had never really been that kind of person. But he can’t deny that he’s curious. A part of him does want to know, if only out of a morbid kind of curiosity of what could have that kind of impact on his friends. Even though Joan had talked about Talyn’s reaction, it was clear to Thomas that it had bothered them too.
Dishes clatter in the sink as Joan sets the water bottle they’d borrowed from Thomas amongst the plates and bowls that Thomas hadn’t gotten around to cleaning yet. Neither of them said anything, letting the whir of the AC unit fill the uncomfortable silence between them. Something about it had gotten under Joan’s skin. Something they weren’t telling Thomas.
Thomas opens his mouth to ask them about it when Joan interrupts him suddenly. “I don’t know, man. It was weird and it felt like a warning of some sort. Maybe that’s why Talyn and I both felt a little paranoid after we watched it.” Their dark eyes flicker up to Thomas as they turn from the sink to look at him through the cut out opening above the counter into the living room. “I just don’t really want to dwell on it.”
Thomas caves and nods. “Okay.”
“But if you want to do another Reasons to Smile, that might be fun. A few people in the chat were suggesting it. Maybe that’d be a good idea.” They cross back into the living room and grabs their jacket from the back of the chair.
“Sure,” Thomas says, still a little lost in his thoughts. What could be so bad about that video? “Yeah, I’ll reach out to Camden and the team and whoever is in town to see if they might wanna join in. Maybe I can get Lee or Mary Lee to join this time.”
“Cool.” Joan stops after they’ve pulled their jacket on. Thomas can feel their gaze on him. “You okay?”
Thomas blinks and shakes his head to clear it. “Yeah. Just worried,” he says honestly. He offers a faint smile. “You and Talyn don’t usually get freaked out easily.”
Joan gives him a look. “We have anxiety,” they deadpan teasingly. Thomas huffs a laugh, even though it does little to expel the tightness in his chest. Joan sighs softly. “Really, Thomas. We’re okay.”
Thomas nods again. “Okay.”
“I gotta run,” Joan says, sounding faintly apologetic. “I’m gonna be late for my lesson.”
Thomas gives them a smile that he hopes is reassuring. “Go. Love you.”
“Love you too.” Joan closes the door behind them.
…
Thomas slips his phone into the back pocket of his jeans and cranes his neck up towards the night sky. It’s little late to be posting the Sunday Shout-Out video, but he liked the nighttime. The parking lot is empty except for his car, and even though he knows he ought to just go home given the hour, a part of him wants to stay out just a little longer.
Thomas sighs and jumps up on the trunk of his car and sits. He fold his hands behind his head and leans back against the windshield, looking up at the stars. Most of them are drowned out by the streetlights that illuminate the lot, but Thomas doesn’t mind. A cool breeze plays with the ends of his hair. It’s calming.
Thomas sighs and closes his eyes.
“I really ought to insist that you go home before too much longer, Thomas.”
The internet personality smiles faintly at the sound of his Logical Side’s voice. He cracks an eye open to find Logan standing beside the car, his arms crossed over his chest and an eyebrow cocked. Thomas’s lips curl up in a faint smile.
“I know, Logan.”
“If you know, then why do you appear to be falling asleep in the middle of an abandoned parking lot?”
Thomas sits up. “I wasn’t falling asleep.”
Logan hums, seemingly unconvinced. “All the same. Optimal rest is necessary for you to maintain a healthy lifestyle.”
“I know.” Thomas shakes his head a little, still smiling, and leans back again. “But this is nice.”
“This?” Thomas can hear the skepticism and confusion in Logan’s voice and tries not to laugh.
“Yes,” Thomas replies. He shifts over. “Take a seat. Try it out for yourself.”
There’s a brief pause, and Thomas isn’t sure whether or not Logan is going to take him up on the offer. Then Logan climbs up on the car, mirroring Thomas’s position beside him except for the folding his hands across his stomach rather than behind his head. Thomas smiles again. He’s a little surprised, although he supposes he shouldn’t be. Logan was the part of him that sought to learn, after all. And if Logan didn’t understand the appeal of something, he could usually be convinced to try it at least once.
“See?” Thomas says after a moment. “It’s nice.”
Logan doesn’t reply right away. “Perhaps.”
“The whole day was kind of nice, actually,” Thomas continues. He lets his eyes drift closed again. “It felt… normal.”
“Normal is a widely subjective term, Thomas.”
“Normal for me, I mean.” He takes in a deep breath of the night air. “Filming, livestreaming, hanging out with Joan. I think maybe I needed that. I needed a day to just be… normal again. Maybe not everything has to change, y’know?”
Logan doesn’t say anything. Thomas feels him shift beside him and he cracks an eye open. Logan is looking up at the sky. The streetlights reflect off the lens of his glasses. A short gust of wind tugs at the end of his stiped tie. There’s something in his expression that Thomas can’t quite read.
He doesn’t dwell on it. Thomas follows Logan’s gaze back up to the sky. “Do you remember,” Thomas asks, “when I was like, seven and wanted to be an astronaut?”
“Yes,” Logan replies. “I do remember that. It was an aspiration that lasted for nearly a full year.”
Thomas glances over at him. “Do you wish I still wanted that?”
Logan adjusts the frame of his glasses before folding his hands across his stomach again. “I don’t believe it’s that simple. I was more than content at your chosen field, Thomas, short-lived as your use of it may have been.”
“You’re talking about chemical engineering.”
“Indeed.” Logan is still looking up at the sky above them. “Although, such fields of study have many unexpected benefits. Perhaps it will prove useful yet.”
The corner of Thomas’s lips curls up in a faint smile. “Perhaps,” he says, echoing Logan from a moment ago. A comfortable silence settles between them. For all the times that Logan and Thomas had been at odds with each other, he’d never doubted that Logan was doing his best to look out for him, just like all of them always did. Most of the time, Thomas found Logan’s company a quiet kind of grounding. Calming. Tonight was no exception to that.
Thomas listens to the crickets and sound of distant car tires rolling on pavement for a long moment. His eyes drift shut again.
“You are getting tired,” Logan says softly, moments before Thomas was about to fall asleep. “I really must insist that you go home to ensure your safety.”
Thomas blinks his eyes open and sits up. He scrubs a hand across his eyes, bangs falling across his face in the process, and smiles tiredly at Logan as the Logical Side sits up beside him.
“You got it, Logan.” He pauses, the smile a little. “And… thanks.”
…
#sanders sides#sanders sides fanfiction#spider-man au#sanders sides spider-man au#platonic lamp/calm#character!thomas#with great power#wgp#wgp fic#tw cursing#tw nightmare mention#tw anxiety mention
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Xenoforce II Chapter 12
(Before we get into the story I just wanna make an update. I will not be posting 2 story posts per day now. No longer will you have to wait to see what happens in the next chapter in a story! Enjoy)
Chapter 13: Upgrade time (Disclaimer! I own nothing of Xenoblade or Ratchet or Clank!!) There was a celebration for our paintball team winning the championship. A cake was made in my honor for leading the team to victory. Ej poured a drink all over me. “Great job dude!” he said. “Thanks,” I said. Denise noticed that my electric batons had a bit of an upgrade. “Where did you get those new batons?” she asked. “Nowhere special,” I said, “Just a little place called Future Industries!” “But that’s all the way in Republic City,” said Denise. “There’s more industries in other areas on the Earth thanks to Asami Sato,” I said. (To the 4th wall) True fact. “Where’s Ratchet?” asked Bryan. “Grim’s having him repair some cars,” I said, “But its ok.” I suddenly had a vision. A car was about to hit the building and hit Denise. Acting quickly I pushed her out of the way. “What the hell was that?” she asked. It was him. Mumkhar. He was traveling via a mechon. “Michael Morrison,” he said, “And the rat pack.” “What do you want?” I asked. One of the mechon tentacles grabbed me and brought me near him. “I want you to find your friend Xenoblade, and tell him to meet me at the abandoned warehouse tomorrow at 5,” said Mumkhar, “And tell him to come alone.” He looked at Maddi, Denise, Ej and Bryan. “Or this will be the last day you see your friends as humans,” he said. “If you lay one finger on them….” I said. “You’ll do what?” asked Mumkhar. He threw me at a wall and I hit my head and was unconscious. Through a few blinks I saw my friends being taken away. I heard a voice calling my name. “Michael!” she said. I woke up and saw Micah. “Michael what happned?” she asked. “Mumkhar���. My friends…. Ambush….” I said. I gained back consciousness and explained the whole situation to her. We ran off to the garage where Anela was. “Mumkhar’s back!” I said, “And he’s got the rest of the team hostage.” “What’s his play?” asked Anela. “Something about evolution through mechons,” I said, “He wants to force humans into machines to build a new world order.” “Whatever that means it can’t be good,” said Micah, “We gotta stop him!” “Good thing the suit’s ready,” she said. She pressed a button and a capsule came out. From within it was my new Xeno-suit. It had a green and orange color instead of blue and orange. “Nice!” I said. It had an upgraded monado and the digital headband. “I think you’ll like this headband a lot better,” said Anela. I tried it out and the effects looked more real than usual. “What kind of power source did you use for this?” I asked. “Well I don’t mean to brag, but I got that bionis crystal from Professor Elvin Gadd himself.” “Wait…. You got that thing from Elvin Gadd?” I asked. She nodded. “WHAT?!” I asked, “How, when, who?!” “Professor E,” said Anela. “WHAT?!” I asked, “How, when?!” “At the science fair,” said Anela. “WHAT?!” I asked, “How?!” “It was in the gift bag,” said Anela. “WHAT?!” I asked. “Michael I think you know what!!!” she said. “Ok, enough jab,” I said, “Its time to suit up.” I started to suit up and get my suit on. “Also you’ll need these,” said Anela, “Since mechons are machines, it’ll take some EMP powered bullets to shut them down.” She gave Micah a shotgun emp gun, and gave me a rifle and 2 pistols. “Now we’re playing with power,” I said, “Now to pick up some more candidates.” I rushed over to Grimroth’s Autoshop to get Ratchet, Clank, and Cara. I was about to open the door but Cara already got it. She had a similar hairstyle to a cartoon character. “Kari, from Digimon Adventure!” I said. She just looked at me with a bored expression. “Christ, you’re old,” she responded. I did a fake laugh. “Fake laugh, hiding real pain,” I said, “Go get Cricket and Crank.” “You guys going to get some donuts?” asked Cara Lynn. “No, you know that metal head that was terrorizing Los Angeles?” I asked, “He’s got my friends, and I need you guy’s help to save them.” “Michael, is that you?” asked Grim. “Yeah, I need to borrow your employees for a while,” I said, “We’re on a mission to save the world!” “Michael, let’s move!” said Micah, “Its mechon scrambling time!” “I’m gonna wait outside,” I said, “It’s a big place, and its strange seeing only you guys. Its almost as if…. The author couldn’t afford another Ratchet and Clank character.” We were later in a ship that Ratchet built. “How fast did you say this would get us to the abandoned warehouse?” I asked. “10 minutes,” said Ratchet, “I may not look it, but I can build a ship in a matter of minutes.” “Nice,” I said. “Guys, I don’t mean to interrupt your nerd talk, but it looks like we got company,” said Micah. I looked down and saw Mechons barricading the doors. (To the 4th wall) Time to put this suit to good use. I jumped down from the plane. Ratchet landed it next to me. The mechons looked at me. “State your prime objective,” said one of them. “4 kids here to kick the ass of a Fredrick Mumkhar,” I said. “Intruder alert,” said the other one, “Prepare to fight.” “Wow, you guys seem tough but I’m saving myself for Mumkhar,” I said, “That’s why I brought them.” “Alright let’s kick some tail,” said Ratchet. The mechon pushed Ratchet away. “This might take a while!” he said. “I mean that’s why I brought her?” I said. I turned to Cara who was doing some instagram of tweet. “Knock em dead girl,” I said. She did a move similar to Pikachu’s volt tackle and knocked one of the mechons out cold. (To the 4th wall) I so pity the guy who pressured her into a Pokémon battle. “Michael let’s move!” said Micah, “Its metal scramblin’ time!” I followed her inside. Meanwhile Mumkhar was on a mechon planning a trap. Some kids were on a balcony ride and saw him. “Super cool!” said someone. Mumkhar commanded a mechon to fire a missle at a control and the ride started to fall. Mumkhar caught it and took the kids hostage. Some mechons were coming near us. “WAIT!!!” I said, “You may be wondering what’s with the ghetto costume. Well that’s so bad guys can’t see how I do my tricks.” They just looked at me. “Now if you’ll excuse me I gotta go save my friends,” I said. I was about to take a step but one of them attacked me. “Ok, I can see you won’t let me through without a fight,” I said. (To the 4th wall). Any of you seen Deadpool? Spoiler alert! “Let’s see how many bullets it takes to take these assholes down,” I said. I jumped up and shot a bullet at a mechon and it was shut down. I then did a flip and shot two bullets at two mechons. “Holy shit!” said Micah. I switched to the machine gun mode and shot multiple bullets at a mechon shutting it down. One of them was speeding around me. “Shit,” I said, “22, 23. Crap! Bad Xenoblade.” I saw one near me. “24,” I said as I shot the mechon, “Good Xenoblade.” 4 of them came near me. “25, 26, 27, 28!” I said as I shot them down. I shot one of them an extra time. “29,” I said, “STUPID! But worth it.” The speedy mechon came at me again. I jumped up and shot it and it shut down. “30,” I said. We all freed the humans from the machine. (To the 4th wall) I’m feeling good today. “I’ll help Ratchet and Cara,” said Micah, “You go save the others!” “Got it,” I said. I got on my skateboard and raced to the top of the abandoned warehouse. “Xenoblade!” said Mumkhar. He had my friends in a cage on one side and the innocent children on another side. “This is why only a fool would decide to be a hero, because you never know when a supervillain would force them to make a sadistic choice,” said Mumkhar, “Let die your closest friends, or suffer the little children?” People were watching. “And look,” said Mumkhar, “A lot of people are here to witness the true person you really are! So make your choice and see how the world sees you.” “Don’t do this Mumkhar!” I said. “We are who we choose to be,” said Mumkhar, “Now choose!” He dropped them both. I was left with a choice. Who was I gonna save? Both of them of course! I jumped on my skateboard and caught the cage and threw it to the top of the building, then I caught the carrier and brought it down gently so the kids could get out safe and sound. The crowd cheered for me. I went back up to confront Mumkhar. “Well that was fun and all, but your little charade ends now,” I said. “You really think you can take me on and save the world?” asked Mumkhar. “I may have had a few setbacks here and then,” I said, “But now I’m here to put an end to the bad guys scheme and give Los Angeles a bright future!” The crowd was starting to worry. “What the….” I said. “SETBACKS?!” shouted someone. It was a stranger in a mask. He chased after me but I was able to hold my own for a while. He then used some kind of telepath power to stop me in place and bring me near him. “Were my wife and son, ‘setbacks’?” he asked. He removed his mask. “Professor Freeman?” I asked , “I…. Your wife and son, I saved….” “NO!” he said, “You were too busy that you didn’t notice them in the crossfire. My family is gone because of you!!!” He pressed a button unleashing mechons from all around the city. People were starting to run away. “What are you doing?” I asked. “You took everything from me when you left my family to die,” said Professor Freeman, “So now I’m gonna return the favor and take everything from you!” Mechons were coming near my friends. “No, don’t do this!” I said. “You’re going to watch everybody you care about be destroyed,” said Freeman pulling me closer, “Then its your turn.” “Professor!” said someone. It was Kitty. “Don’t do this!” she said. “Kitty…” said Professor Freeman. “This isn’t you,” said Kitty, “Is this what your family would’ve wanted?” “They’re dead because of him!” said Professor Freeman. “Xenoblade may make mistakes, but they’re to learn from,” said Kitty. “I’m sorry Kitty but this has to be done,” said Professor Freeman. Kitty got in the way. “I’m not gonna let you do it!” “Very well,” said Professor Freeman, “I’ll have to kill you both!” He was about to attack when someone froze him in his tracks. It was Micah. “Ice of you to drop by,” said Denise. “Ha,” said Micah, “Never heard that one before.” I used my monado to cut them free. “Now all we have to do is find out where and how Mumkhar is controlling all of these things,” said Maddi. “Guys, try the floating island,” said Micah, “How are we gonna get up there?” “Why not take a lift?” asked someone. It was Principal Gibson in a giant ship. “Turns out that article in Paranormal activity happened to be true,” he said, “Took a lot of scientists to get this out of the water. Its dusty but I think it’ll get the job done.” “Gibson you badass mutha fucker,” said Bryan. “Ooooohhh, you kiss your mother with that mouth?” asked Principal Gibson.
#xenoforceii#xenoblade chronicles#ratchet and clank#mumkhar#metal face#FFEU phase 1#fan fiction extended universe
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A love/hate review of the movie Solo: A Star Wars Story. As a movie, it felt pretty formulaic which can be a good and bad thing for some movies. I love the Marvel Movies which are formulaic as fuck but they still make me feel good after the credits so I let it slide. No, with Solo it was formulaic and also let way too many opportunities slip thru their fingers instead of exploring them more fully. I will get to those opportunities below. This movie was ‘good’ but didn’t leave me with that tingling feeling that I get after a good movie that makes we want to go out become a scoundrel smuggler.
The Blaster (Love)
Seems kinda of small (which it is) but not every detail about Solo movie needed to be its own in-depth scene of how it became part of who he (Solo) is. The scene around the campfire where Beckett removed the stock and barrel from his rifle making it a simple blaster was all I really needed. For that matter, the ammo belt that Chewbacca received becoming the same over the shoulder strap that he wears for decades pretty much gave me the same effect the blaster did which was a good warm fuzzy feeling.
Mimban Campaign (Hate)
Just to be clear I didn't hate this scene because it was in the movie, I hate this scene because it was so damn short. One thing that Rogue One did right was showing a prolonged battle between the Rebels and the Imperials on the beach planet. It was gritty and fun to watch like Band of Brothers with Stormtroopers. In regards to Solo, we only get a small glimpse of Hans military career for the Empire and the battle itself was little more than lasers into the fog and a couple dead Stormtroopers. Tagging on 5 to 10 minutes of action might have drawn out the movie some but we don't want witty banter the whole movie, sometimes we just want to watch the Empire at war.
Marketing (Love)
I am not grasping at straws here people, I will get deeper into what I liked about the movies and characters further down but I have to give a nod to the marketing work for this movie. The painted posters were nothing short of awesome and the kind of movie posters you frame and hang up in your hall if you were the story to have a hall leading to a private theater in your house which I don't have but a man can dream.
The Crew (Hate)
Another thing in the movie that I actually loved but they just seemingly let it all slip thru the cracks. Comparing Solo to Rogue One again we were introduced to characters, got to see them in action thru out the movie and then lost them one by one in final scenes which pulled on our soul. Solo had that opportunity but ended up killing Val and Rio which basically felt like empty deaths for two characters we hardly knew. It was a shame because they both felt endlessly interesting and about the only meaningful death besides Beckett was L3-37 being the sassy British android she was.
I understand Val (Thandie) needing to leave the set to get back to shooting Westword but they could have at the very lest kept Rio in the movie to perhaps be betrayed by Beckett who wants the easy payday and is embracing his own dark side after losing Val. Just a thought but damn I wish they explored the heist crew more then they did.
Dryden Vos (Loved)
I am biased here as I think Paul Bettany has been one of the best voices (and actors) to come thru Hollywood in the past 20 years. He, of course, appeared on my radar in The Knights Tale and being the voice of Jarvis and eventually, the voice/body of Vision made him one of my favorite actors. Besides my appreciation for his acting chops, I thought he made a great villain who was not outright wicked but rather an understanding criminal lord who expects loyalty and for the job to be done. I love a villain with some moral ambiguity to them and he seemed to provide that very well in his character willing to provide Beckett and Han a chance to make things right for the Crimson Dawn syndicate. If it was any other Star Wars Villain you likely get choked out, shot or cut in half. I suppose what I am trying to say is his reasonability makes him an interesting bad guy.
Enfys Nest (Hate)
Once again not a character I hated at all. I actually hope they do more with her as a character in the series if they ever do a squeal (which they totally should). What bothered me about her was the whole big helmet reveal scene on the sand. It felt like it was supposed to have some gravity to the plot and for a moment I thought it did being Val and Beckett's daughter who has been competing with her parents for resources to give to the rebellion. I was clearly wrong because that was NOT her backstory and we were all supposed to be surprised that she was a ginger girl with freckles on her face. Honestly, I like my idea better than the studios ‘surprise it's a girl’ attempt that honestly didn't really surprise anyone. *sighs* Another missed opportunity making her have a connected backstory.
The Cast (Loved)
Pretty much EVERYONE in the movie was a brilliant casting option, I sit here now trying to think back to anyone that didn't work in the film and struggle to do that much. Alden as Han? Pretty good choice, a little gullible but still a great option. Woody as Beckett? Pretty hard not to see Woody Harrelson as Woody Harrelson but he plays the rogue well. Donald as Lando? Fucking amazing pick for the role. Thandie as Val? Short-lived but still a great pick who I would love to see more of. Phobe as L3-37? Spunky like most robots now in the SWU which is something I always love to see. Emilia as Qi’ra? How can I resist Khaleesi? Everyone fits into the movie well which makes it so much sadder that all those missed opportunities in the movie amounted to it losing its heart.
Side Note: Lando, Qi’ra, and L3-37 all deserve their own little note on this review but I didn't want to take TOO long writing this.
Writing (Love/Hate)
It should be pretty clear I liked the movie but also didn't like it. There was so much potential here but in the end, they wasted way too many great chances to explore this chapter in the Star Wars Universe. The train heist should have been longer, the battle on the swamp planet should have shown more conflict, Enfys should have been Val and Beckett’s kid, and they should have kept the heist crew together so we could become more invested before losing them.
In the end, I just didn't feel as connected as I should have. Perhaps I was/am still coming down from Disney scaling back the Star Wars Universe to the movies (and the cartoon). Maybe I am still feeling a little pissed off with the Last Jedi having such a great lead-in before the new director changed the direction of the second movie. Maybe I had expectations for the movie subconsciously. I really don't know why but something was missing and I didn't feel too impressed by the end. I know they tried to put that shocking hologram of Darth Maul but honestly, I was just kinda meh by that point.
Conclusion
Go see this movie. Its far from the best Star Wars has to offer but consider it an investment for a sequel which it deserves (at least that much). They laid some fine foundation for the story and characters which could lead to a great second movie before Star Wars Episode 4. Most of my ‘hates’ above are only half hates where I enjoyed most of the things presented it was their execution that was off in the movie. So maybe I did like the movie but I simply wanted it to be so much more. As always thanks for the read.
Regards Michael California
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