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droewyn · 7 years

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Give Me a Reason (7/11)

February, 2015

“Hair of the dog, mon ange?” Lounging on the bed nude, relaxed, and disgustingly unhungover, Christophe tipped an open bottle of Grey Goose toward Victor. The store name on the price sticker was written in Cyrillic, and was quite familiar.

“You went through my luggage?” Mock outrage would not have been possible before the painkillers, water, and hot shower. It would probably have been more convincing after two or three cups of tea. “I brought that for your birthday.”

Chris smiled sweetly, showing off his dimples. “And today it is my birthday. What a wonderful surprise; I’m touched by your thoughtfulness.”

Victor shook his head, unable to contain a fond chuckle at his friend’s antics. “This is why I don’t wrap your gifts,” he said. “It would be a pointless gesture.”

“If you did, the customs officials would only make you unwrap them again at the airport,” Chris pointed out.

“True enough. What time is it?”

Christophe checked his phone. “We’ve more than enough time for breakfast before the men’s free.”

“Wonderful.” Hopefully a full stomach would chase away the remaining aftereffects of the prior evening. Chris had insisted on dragging Victor out on an impromptu club crawl of every gay hotspot in Bern. It was fun for as long as they were together, but the crowd on the dance floor invariably separated them, and whether he was recognized or not, Victor was never left unpartnered for long. Dancing led to grinding, and then to drink offers that were far less awkward to accept than to turn down. Next was more dancing if he was lucky, and shouted pick-up lines and attempts at small talk if he wasn’t. Chris eventually appeared to rescue him, but not before the Sharpies materialized. By the end of the night, Victor had been covered in scribbled names and phone numbers, not one of which he could match with a face if he cared enough to try. The marker had scrubbed away in the shower with the aid of some hand sanitizer. The three different colors of glitter turning his skin into a teenage vampire fantasy were more stubborn. “Shall I make you some birthday blini?”

Chris appeared to consider the idea. “Why not?” he decided finally. “I’ve been wanting to remodel my kitchen, and you burning it down will give me the excuse that I need.”

Victor gasped as Christophe’s lips twisted into a smirk. “That happened once!” he protested hotly. “More than three years ago! I’ll have you know that I’ve improved since then.”

“Like a fine wine, darling, but whatever does that have to do with your cooking?”

In the end, Chris was the one to make the pancakes, preferring the texture of true crepes to the egginess of blini. His honor on the line, Victor produced both a cream cheese sauce and a berry reduction for toppings. The mimosas were a joint effort, Christophe declaring that they paired far better with sweet crepes than Bloody Marys did, the latter made with natal day vodka or no. Settling into the comfort of Chris’ leather sofa, the two men solemnly clinked their champagne flutes together in a silent toast.

“Mon dieu, you have improved.” Having dipped the tip of a spoon into one of the serving bowls for a taste, Chris was now enthusiastically dolloping both red and white sauces onto his plate. “To what do we owe this miracle?” His face turned thoughtful. “Or, should I say, to whom?”

Victor flushed. “You know I’ve been watching a lot of American television lately,” he began evasively.

“Entirely on your own initiative, of course.” Chris wasn’t having any of it. He’d been teasing Victor about Lukewarm Mess a lot over the past year, ever since noticing that Victor suddenly seemed to be glued to his phone whenever they met at competitions. He had jumped to entirely the wrong conclusion, labeling Mess and Victor’s correspondence a long-distance romance instead of the comfortable friendship that it actually was. Of course, if Victor had told Chris the nature of the chat channel, rather than letting him form his own assumptions…

No. There were things that Victor couldn’t say out loud, not even to his closest friend. He didn’t think that he could face the disappointment in Christophe’s eyes – or, worse, the sympathy.

He sighed in defeat. “All right. My friend Mess and I,” he emphasized the word, “have been watching an instructional cooking show called Good Eats together. His parents run a bed-and-breakfast,” or something like one; Mess had always been rather vague on the subject of his family business. And his family in general. Having no taste for hypocrisy, and holding personal secrets of his own, Victor never pressed, “and he started helping in the kitchen when he was five.”

“Ah. So when he learned that you actually eat those revolting nutri-meals the sports dietitians try to inflict on us…”

“He was shocked and appalled and took immediate responsibility for remedying the situation, yes.” Victor smiled at the memory. There had been exclamation points. The phrase ‘Purina Human Chow’, accompanied by a slew of kaomojis. And descriptions of various meals that Mess and his roommate liked to cook, so loving that they had verged on pornographic.

“And the result?”

He shrugged. “I’ve started making real food for myself on rest days, sometimes. I don’t think I’ll ever enjoy cooking enough to want to do it after a full day of practice, and I’m not exactly creative in the kitchen, but I can follow a recipe just fine. Yuri says that my stroganoff isn’t completely disgusting, which is high praise coming from him.”

Christophe’s eyes were comically wide. “Marry that man,” he breathed. “Marry him quickly, before he escapes.”

“We live on opposite sides of the world. We’ve never even met.” The opportunity had been there a few months ago, and not only had Victor well and truly blown it, he’d nearly destroyed his and Mess’ friendship in the process. But Chris didn’t need to know any of that, either.

“All the better. Ensnare him before he knows what he’s getting into.”

Victor was saved from further prodding into his nonexistent love life by his phone alarm, alerting them to the beginning of the men’s singles coverage. Chris turned on the TV, and the familiar sight of Mokdong Ice Rink illuminated the screen. A pair of commentators preened for the camera as they discussed the history of the Four Continents Championship and the year’s host city, Seoul. In the background, the first group of skaters was warming up.

The woman promised a ‘hot time on the ice’, which prompted her male counterpart to chuckle as though she’d said something both witty and original. Victor winced. “Isn’t there a raw feed we could watch instead?” he asked plaintively.

“Not for a competition that Switzerland isn’t invited to,” Chris said. “Besides, Florian and Sarah really are quite knowledgeable once the actual skating starts.” Now the announcers were trading cold weather puns back and forth. Victor had first heard every single one of them while he was still in Novices. “They’re national treasures, really.”

“Then by all means, lock them away in a secret vault under armed guard.”

Chris tsked at him. “Someone’s ready for more alcohol.”

By the time the drinks were poured – and, in Victor’s case, immediately slammed back and poured again – the warmups had finished and the skating begun.

Watching others perform was never easy for Victor. It was impossible to lose himself in another’s program when some part of him was always watching with a champion’s eye, analyzing every edge and gesture. If he were the one dancing, he’d change the jump composition so, and the choreography thusly. Victor tended to think of that critical little voice as his Inner Yakov, and it had only grown louder and less forgiving over the years.

If he’d hoped that he could manage to silence it given enough vodka, it turned out that he was very much mistaken.

“What the hell was that?” he snapped at the screen. The current skater was part of the second group, or was it the third? The half-empty glass in front of Victor was definitely his fifth. “That idiot needs to go home and skate nothing but figures until he learns his left from his right.”

At first Chris had been delighted with his friend’s scathing remarks, but as time went on and Victor’s tongue stayed sharp enough to cut, glee faded into something between horror and awe.

“A fitting tribute to the bombast of Wagner,” Victor declared of another performance. “Pity he’s actually trying to dance the Sugarplum Fairy.”

Not even the medal contenders were spared. Hometown favorite Seung-gil Lee’s program earned wondering amazement that technology had advanced far enough to allow robots to compete against humans. JJ Leroy was branded a little lost hockey player whose goalie probably missed him.

“Unless he is the goalie,” Victor continued, warming to his subject. “He certainly skates like he’s used to being stuck in a ten-foot box for hours on end.”

A dark-haired figure in blue took position. “Disney called; they want Prince Charming’s wardrobe back,” Victor sneered. But then the music started, melancholy synthed-harpsichord and violin, joined by the breathy velvet of Freddie Mercury’s vocals. The man – Yuuri Katsuki -- started to dance. And Victor found his mouth snapping shut.

It was far from perfect. The jump composition was unambitious – safe, Inner Yakov whispered snidely – and even then Katsuki was struggling with his landings. But his spins and transitions were solid, and his footwork was… exquisite. Better than mine, Victor thought, and for once Inner Yakov didn’t disagree. But all of that was background noise. Katsuki’s musicality had always been his greatest strength; when he moved, he appeared to shape the music rather than allowing it to direct his body. This skate was no different. Or rather, it was different, because Victor couldn’t recall ever seeing him dance a conversation before.

Who wants to live forever, the music asked. Do I? Katsuki’s body wondered in return. Should I? Why should I?

Give me a reason to want to.

Neither Freddie nor Katsuki seemed to have an answer to that.

His eyes were stinging. When was the last time that Victor had thought, really thought about his own reasons? He’d made it a daily habit, just as Mess had suggested so long ago, until the process was as automatic as the rest of his morning routine. Wake up, brush teeth, apply face mask, walk Makkachin, come up with some sort of motivation to keep putting one foot in front of the other for another day, go home and get ready to skate. What had his reason even been that morning? Oh. Right. Watching Four Continents with Chris. And how’s that working out for me? Drunk, in a foul mood, and getting looks from Chris like he’s worried I’m about to go for his throat.

What a way to celebrate his best friend’s birthday.

Despairing. Lost. On the edge of surrender, the song had one final, hesitant, suggestion. Love. What about loving forever?

A heart-wrenching pause, the words either too late or not enough to reach the despondent skater. But then Katsuki’s head snapped up, and he exploded into motion. Twizzles, spins, a three-jump combo that nobody had any business attempting so late in a program, but nailed with textbook precision and a resolve so fierce that it burned. Suddenly, after all of his searching, Katsuki had his answer. His reason. His forever. The music – and performance -- ended in triumph, two hands clutched against a heaving chest, newfound love held fast to his heart.

I wish someone would skate like that for me.

And wasn’t that thought just the most surprising thing?

“Nothing to say, mon coeur?” Chris was looking at him curiously. On the screen, Katsuki took his bows, a broad grin splitting his face. Someone tossed a plush dog on the ice that looked rather similar to the toy Makkachins that Victor was usually showered with. The skater collected it on his way to the kiss and cry, where he crushed it against his chest while waiting for his scores.

What was there to say? That Victor had been struggling to answer that very same question since the moment he’d realized that sleepwalking through life wasn’t normal? That he’d somehow managed to trade all of his human emotions for gold medals, but couldn’t remember making the bargain? That the one person he wanted so badly to trust, the one he came closest to unburdening himself completely with, didn’t know Makkachin’s name, or even that she was a poodle? Because when Lukewarm Mess had asked to see pictures of KingElsa’s baby, as both a friend and fellow dog-lover inevitably would, Victor had panicked? What kind of pathetic person needed to use their elderly neighbor’s Samoyed as a catfish? Did it even count as catfishing if he wasn’t actually misrepresenting himself… except, oh wait, he was doing that, too.

When exactly did Victor become as big of a dick as his public persona?

He muttered something in response to Chris, and was immediately asked to repeat it. “I said his jumps could use some work,” Victor said again, barely louder the second time. “And I should send his coach my costume designer’s card. That generic getup didn’t support Katsuki’s performance at all.”

Chris blinked at him, his eyes taking on a contemplative gleam that Victor wasn’t sure he liked. “Really? How interesting.”

There were only a handful of skaters left after that. Once the dust had settled, Cao Bin topped the podium, his famous stoicism giving way to tears when China’s anthem began to play. To Bin’s right, a young powerhouse from Kazakhstan stood straight and proud, a hero who had been granted his just reward. And to Bin’s left…

Yuuri Katsuki looked composed at first glance, but his gaze was unfocused and there was color riding high in his cheeks. A soft, almost disbelieving smile tugged at the corners of his mouth, and one hand kept creeping up to brush his medal with reverent fingers. And at one point, although the camera was panning away to focus on Bin, Victor could have sworn that he saw the bronze medalist surreptitiously pinch his own forearm.

Adorable.

“See something you like?” Chris purred, and Victor flushed. Had he honestly just said that out loud? “I’ve been trying to get you and my darling Yuuri in the same room for simply ages, but the dearest pain au cannelle always refuses me.”

“Really?” A senior skater who wasn’t frothing at the mouth at the chance to be introduced to Victor Nikiforov? Now that was interesting. “Do you know why?” The likeliest explanation was that Katsuki was uncomfortable with Chris and wanted to limit contact with him. It was a shame, but very few skaters looked past the over-the-top flirting to see the genuinely good man behind it. Although, wouldn’t they have to be on at least friendly terms for Chris to extend the offer in the first place? Chris would never abuse Victor’s trust by acting as a go-between to strangers, and a friendship would certainly explain the English pet names. Christophe might shower a room full of acquaintances with French endearments until the words lost all meaning, but he had very few dearests or darlings. So why, then?

Something of Victor’s interest must have shown on his face, because Chris had gone from mischievous to downright predatory. “Alas, but my sweet Yuuri is shy,” he murmured sadly. “Do you know how long it took to get him to stop calling me ‘Giacometti-san’? Most of Juniors, and he never looked up to me the way he does you.”

Oh. It was like being doused in cold water. Of course there was nothing different about Katsuki; of course he was a fan. He was simply too timid to act when given an opportunity. Victor had always known he’d been an influence on the Japanese skater; there had been echoes of his own skating in Katsuki’s performances for as far back as Victor had watched them. Nothing overt, probably nothing that was ever deliberately inserted, but always present. Victor should have realized what that would mean before…

Before what? Before I fell for a pair of sad eyes and a routine that I thought was speaking to me? He’s a performer, no more genuine than I am. He couldn’t understand how I feel, and if he did he wouldn’t care. Because he’s my fan, and at best I’m nothing more than a goalpost to him. At worst? Victor had read the fanfiction. He knew what sort of person read it. Wrote it.

“Well, don’t push the poor boy’s boundaries on my account,” he said with a careless shrug. “I only thought it was cute to see someone so excited to finish in third.”

Chris blinked at him, nonplussed. He obviously hadn’t expected such a non-reaction, but when Victor just smiled blandly at him he sighed, and dropped the suggestion. “Ah well, you know what they say; silver is bitter, wishing it were gold, but bronze is simply happy for a place to stand.”

“Is that how you feel?” Victor was off-balance. Off-balance and drunk, that was the only explanation for the too-honest question that spilled from his lips, too soft and raw to be taken as anything other than the plea that it was. Already rattled, Christophe stared at him in shock, his mouth falling open. Victor knew with a sinking feeling that it was probably a futile effort, but he forced his mouth to twist into an amused smirk anyway. “Because I’m afraid I can’t go easy on you simply to spare your feelings.”

Chris clearly didn’t believe a word of it. “Victor—“ Whatever he was planning on saying next was interrupted by his phone, which loudly declared that it was too sexy for various articles of clothing as it started vibrating across the table. Chris glanced at the display. “It’s Josef,” he said, frowning. “I can—“

“Take it,” Victor was still grinning, not knowing what else to do. “It’s probably important.”

Another hesitation coupled with a long, searching glance, and Chris thumbed the green icon to accept the call. Victor looked away, ostensibly to give his friend some privacy. The fake smile slid off his face like the lie that it was, leaving something blank and empty in its place. Victor’s French was good, and Josef tended to shout into phones; the coach was calling about a last minute interview request, a magazine article with a photo spread.

Something that might get Victor off the hook, at least for a little while.

“Non,” Christophe was shaking his head. “Pas aujourd'hui. Nous fêtons mon anniversaire, et—“

“Il va le faire!” Victor called out, loud enough for Josef to hear. “Il va le faire! Je l'aurai prêt dans vingt minutes!”

Chris glared at him. “Un moment, Josef,” he said into the phone, then slapped his finger over the microphone. “Victor—“

“It’s a good opportunity,” he said, cutting Chris short. “You shouldn’t pass up a chance at exposure just because I drank a little too much and got maudlin.”

“You need to brush up on your English.” His voice was low, upset. “I believe the word you’re looking for is ‘honest.”

Victor winced. “Look,” he tried again, “just go—“

“Absolutely n—“

“Please? I don’t want to wreck this for you. Besides, I need some time to…“ Sober up. Muster some defenses. Run for the consulate. Or, better yet, the airport. “…get my head back in order.”

“And we’ll talk when I get back.” Chris still looked worried, but he’d started considering the idea. Good.

“Of course.”

Green-gold eyes measured him for a moment longer. Victor did his best not to shrink from the concern in them. “Answer me one thing first.”

Was he being too eager? Not eager enough? Damn it, Victor couldn’t think. “Anything,” he said.

“When was the last time you were happy?”

His mouth opened. Closed again. “I…” he began. Stopped.

“Oh, Vitya.” And then Chris was hugging him. Warm, strong arms wrapped around him, one hand still holding the muted mobile. Chris smelled like spiced amber, and maybe it was weak, but Victor’s self-control had drowned itself hours ago. His pride put up a feeble protest, but the worst had already happened, hadn’t it? His mask had finally slipped, and someone had seen inside. He hugged Chris back, burying his face in his shoulder.

“You really want me to leave you like this?” Chris murmured. Victor nodded without pulling away. “You’re sure?”

“Please.” Victor’s voice cracked on the word. “I just need some space. Some time. I just need…”

Christophe’s arms tightened around his shoulders. “All right, darling,” he said finally, his voice thick. “All right.” One last squeeze, and he released Victor to hold the phone against his ear.

“Josef? Pardon.” Chris hurried into his bedroom, the door closing behind him. Victor sank back into the couch and closed his eyes, tucking his knees up under his chin. He could hear the faint sounds of rushed dressing and Chris’ replies to his coach, and did his best to tune them out. He felt sick to his stomach. Exhausted. Empty. So very empty. Was this a panic attack? It wasn’t anything like Mess’ descriptions, but then Mess always seemed to feel everything, so an excess of emotion made sense for him. For a hollow person like Victor, maybe this numb sort of dread was as close as he could get.

What did Mess say that he did when he got lost in his own head? Victor couldn’t remember. Counting breaths, maybe?

Can’t hurt, I suppose. All right. One… two…

Long moments passed, and then there were gentle fingers in his hair. He opened his eyes.

“Here.” Chris was pressing an object into Victor’s hands. He blinked at it for a second before recognizing it as his laptop. “I know you want to be by yourself for a while, but don’t be alone. Talk to your friends.”

“Chris…” Victor knew that he should be feeling something. Gratitude. Affection. Shame, even. And maybe there was a tiny glow of emotion stirring beneath the haze of alcohol and numbness. It wasn’t enough. “I… I will. Thank you.”

“I am not happy about this.” Chris was still moving, now clattering around in his kitchen. He emerged carrying a glass of water and a plate piled high with cheese, fruit, and crackers. He set them down on the coffee table in front of Victor. “Eat something while I’m gone. And drink.”

Victor eyed the platter. The cheeses were supposed to be for later, for what should have been a happy evening. Reminding himself that he was ruining Chris’ birthday hurt, but the pain was better than nothingness. “I won’t be able to properly appreciate the Bregaglia.” It was a feeble joke, and neither of them smiled at it.

“Eat it anyway.”

“Oui, maman.”

Chris was fussing over him now, delaying his departure. “And call if you need me. For anything.”

“I will.”

Christophe shook his head. His smile was sad, and all too knowing. “No, you won’t,” he said softly.

“Probably not,” Victor agreed.

Then there was a brief press of lips against Victor’s forehead, and Chris left.

The bottles were gone, put away while Victor was lost in his fog. He didn’t think Chris would go so far as to hide them from him, but it would be humiliating to be proven wrong, so he decided not to check. The snacks in front of him looked revolting, and the glass full of nothing but water was mocking him.

I should go out, he thought. Get some air. Get away… He could walk along the Aare, feed the ducks some of those crackers. Maybe take some selfies under the Child-Eater fountain or do some other touristy thing that he and Chris always joked about but never actually did.

Or he could go farther. It wouldn’t be the first time Victor changed flight arrangements on a whim, and it would hardly be the last. Chris might be upset – don’t lie to yourself, Vitya. Chris will be furious – but he was responsible. Responsible, and nowhere near as impulsive as Victor. He wouldn’t hop on a plane this close to Worlds, and Victor would have time to get his shit together, come up with an excuse—

His phone chirped an incoming text alert. It had barely been five minutes since Chris had left; he couldn’t have arrived at the venue yet. Sure enough, when Victor tapped the notification bar more out of habit than actual curiosity, the photo Christophe had sent him showed an empty leather bucket seat. Or almost empty. A very familiar red leather booklet emblazoned with Russia’s double-headed eagle was prominent in the image, resting proudly on top of…

That devious Swiss bastard.

There were no emojis that could possibly express the level of outrage that Victor needed for his reply.

MY SHOES??!?!?!?

Bonjour, mon coeur! How is your online sweetheart?

YOU STOLE. MY SHOES.

And your passport. I *have* met you before, darling.

Now be a good boy and stay put, and I’ll see you when I get home.

I could stretch out your Ferragamos for you…

And risk blisters this close to Worlds? Be my guest.

I’ll buy a new pair or three with my gold medal winnings.

…Damn it. Outmaneuvered by an overgrown Alpine moppet. If word got out, he would never hear the end of it. Well. Never let it be said that Victor Nikiforov didn’t know how to cope with defeat.

I hope the camera adds thirty pounds to your ass.

He sighed, and reached for his laptop.

* Joined channel #therapycouchfort

* Topic is ‘Happy Half-Off-Chocolate Day Eve!’

* Set by SockPuppet on Feb 14 10:39:02 2015

StandardDeviation: hey king

KingElsa: Hello.

KingElsa: Where is everyone?

SockPuppet: Mess is conferencing for business again

StandardDeviation: i haven’t seen mess today

KingElsa: I don’t just come her e to talk to Lukewarm Mess you know.

StandardDeviation: of course not

SockPuppet: You just keep telling yourself that

StandardDeviation: you also come here to talk ABOUT mess.

KingElsa: …

StandardDeviation: it only stings because its true <3

* Peaches_and_Dream has joined #therapycouchfort

Peaches_and_Dream: Hello, boy and girls! Isn’t it a lovely day to be alive?

StandardDeviation: hey peaches

Peaches_and_Dream: ( ❁ ´ ▽ ` ❁ )* ✲ ﾟ *

SockPuppet: Someone’s getting laid…

* lukewarm_mess has joined #therapycouchfort

Peaches_and_Dream: Close, only even better!

SockPuppet: What could be better than getting laid?

Peaches_and_Dream: Mess

Peaches_and_Dream: And

Peaches_and_Dream: I

lukewarm_mess: peach no

Peaches_and_Dream: Received some very prestigious awards tonight!

lukewarm_mess: it’s not necessary to tell everyone

StandardDeviation: congrats you two

SockPuppet: !!! Wtg!

lukewarm_mess: nobody even cares outside of our industry

lukewarm_mess: pls don’t make a fuss

Peaches_and_Dream: Says the man whose numbers were THIRD

Peaches_and_Dream: In almost the entire world

StandardDeviation: that’s really impressive mess

lukewarm_mess: hardly the entire world

Peaches_and_Dream: 6/7 of it

lukewarm_mess: you’re counting antarctica??

SockPuppet: Don’t downplay your achievements, mess

SockPuppet: If you were recognized, it was for a reason

Peaches_and_Dream: ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ *fistbumps Socks*

StandardDeviation: what did you win peach

Peaches_and_Dream: I came in fifth! Which isn’t actually an award category or anything but still. Top five!

Peaches_and_Dream: The high scorers had better watch their backs. I’m coming for them next!

StandardDeviation: you sound so competitive lol

Peaches_and_Dream: It’s a competitive field

Peaches_and_Dream: Practically an olympic sport, really

lukewarm_mess: PEACH

lukewarm_mess: can we change the subject now

StandardDeviation: *pokes king to see if he’s dead*

StandardDeviation: *poke*

StandardDevation: *poooooooooooooooooooke*

SockPuppet: That’s enough

KingElsa: I’m not dead.

lukewarm_mess: hi king

SockPuppet: We were teasing him a little bit and he’s been quiet since. Sorry if we overstepped, King

KingElsa: Hi Mess.

KingElsa: It’s not you guys.

lukewarm_mess: bad day?

KingElsa: You could say that

KingElsa: I accidentally let slip to a friend that I’m…

Peaches_and_Dream: …gay? (͡ ° ͜ʖ ͡ °)

KingElsa: :P

KingElsa: Not always as happy as I act

StandardDeviation: accidentally or “accidentally”

*lukewarm_mess>> {{{hugs}}}

KingElsa: Definitely unintentional

SockPuppet: How did they take it

/msg lukewarm_mess: Thanks <3

Peaches_and_Dream: I’m sure if it’s a good friend he’s concerned about you

KingElsa: he had to go out for a work thing, but he wants to talk when he gets back.

*lukewarm_mess>> i know you’re upset but i can’t help but think this is a good thing

KingElsa: I’d rather run away than face him.

*lukewarm_mess>> you know how i feel about you not having a rl support base

SockPuppet: Running away is a bad idea

lukewarm_mess: don’t run away

/msg lukewarm_mess: The way he looked at me hurt.

/msg lukewarm_mess: I don’t want to be pitoeid

/msg lukewarm_mess: pitied*

*lukewarm_mess>> now i know you’re upset

KingElsa: I…. um. can’t.

*lukewarm_mess>> if you’re making typos

StandardDeviation: ???

/msg lukewarm_mess: Hush, you. Do you even know what the shift key is for??

lukewarm_mess: sure, symbols and emojis :P

KingElsa: He kind of took my shoes and passport with him when he left.

Peaches_and_Dream: OMFG my kind of friend!

StandardDeviation: :O

lukewarm_mess: did you have to tell everyone that

lukewarm_mess: you’ll give peach ideas

SockPuppet: I’m glad you have a friend who cares about you, King

Peaches_and_Dream: Because keeping you inside the apartment is always such a problem, Mess ( ￢ _ ￢ )

Peaches_and_Dream: King ask your dude if he has any solutions for getting people to come out of their room

KingElsa: I wish he cared a little less, to be honest.

StandardDeviation: really? harsh

*lukewarm_mess>> you don’t mean that

KingElsa: No… I guess I don’t mean it. I’m glad he cares. Mostly.

KingElsa: I just wish he didn’t have to?

StandardDeviation: are you wishing for neurotypicality or not to need other people

StandardDeviation: because while we’re at it i wiould like a pony

KingElsa: …I’m being an ass, aren’t I

lukewarm_mess: no

Peaches_and_Dream: A bit

KingElsa: …

Peaches_and_Dream: Okay, serious talk now so pay attention

SockPuppet: This should be good.

Peaches_and_Dream: You seem to me like one of those people who needs to act untouchable in public. It’s even in your screen name. And you’ve mentioned being in a position of high visibility before

KingElsa: Yes…

Peaches_and_Dream: Where does the line between the public you and private you begin? And which side of that line does your friend stand on? Or any of the other people in your life?

KingElsa: That’s the problem. I’m not sure there *is* a line anymore.

KingElsa: If ther eever was.

Peaches_and_Dream: So there’s no one in the world you can turn to? Nobody who can call you out on your bullshit?

KingElsa: You seem to be doing a pretty good job of that right now >.>

Peaches_and_Dream: I’m on the internet, I don’t count. Even if I knew who you were irl, we’re not friends. We’re certainly not close.

KingElsa: True.

Peaches_and_Dream: So my question stands.

KingElsa: My co

KingElsa: boss*

KingElsa: I guess

Peaches_and_Dream: But he’s work, so he’s part of your public life

KingElsa: So is Chris.

KingElsa: My friend, I mean. I met him through work.

Peaches_and_Dream: And did the relationship stay there?

KingElsa: No.

KingElsa: Well. It’s complicated.

KingElsa: We’re rivals as well as friends, so…

Peaches_and_Dream: Do you think he’d take advantage of you professionally if he thought you were vulnerable?

KingElsa: No.

KingElsa: He’s not like that. He’s one of the kindest people I’ve ever met.

Peaches_and_Dream: So he’s someone you feel you can trust?

KingElsa: I don’t want to be a bother to him.

Peaches_and_Dream: That’s not what I asked.

*lukewarm_mess>> Are you okay with this?

KingElsa: …Yes. I can trust Chris.

Peaches_and_Dream: But you don’t want to bother him. Because he’ll stop being your friend if you’re an annoyance to him?

KingElsa: I toldy ou he’s not like that!

lukewarm_mess: peach, that’s enough

Peaches_and_Dream: I believe you. So why don’t you want to bother Chris with your feelings, then?

KingElsa: …

KingElsa: Because I don’t’ want him to see me as we3ak

SockPuppet: OK TIME OUT PEOPLE

KingElsa: I have been on top since I was sixteen yoeuars osld and since I was sixteen I have understoond that if others are oging to look up to me I hvae to be someone that is worhty of being looked up to. I can’t slip I can’t fall I can’t crack because If i do I will let someone donw. I can’t show weakness becausew i can’t BE weka.

SockPuppet: Peach you are overstepping boundaries like woah

Peaches_and_Dream: You’re allowed to be human, King

SockPuppet: BUT I’m hesitant to bounce you because I think you’re acting out of good intentions

KingElsa: says a SALSEMAN who has NO DIEA what I go throu

Peaches_and_Dream: You’d be surprised. We have a lot more in common than you might think

SockPuppet: ENOUGH

KingElsa: you don’t eve n blong here you aren’t even depressd

SockPuppet: THE NEXT PERSON WHO TYPES ANYTHING IS GETTING A THREE DAY KICKBAN

The stark line of text brought Victor up short. What was he doing? He was flinging insults at a college student, that was what he was doing. A college student who had never spoken to him with anything other than kindness, even if it often came paired with a healthy dose of mischief. One who certainly didn’t need to be treated like an enemy or an obstacle.

SockPuppet: Take a deep breath and calm down, both of you

Calm. He’d been calm. Or numb, at least. When did the deadness change into anger? And why? Because Mess' roommate was right; Peaches was just a name on a screen, no more real or relevant to Victor Nikiforov than someone he passed on the street while walking Makkachin. Nothing he said – typed! – should be able to affect Victor in the slightest. Unless…

*lukewarm_mess>> i’m so sorry

*lukewarm_mess>> i don’t know why he’s pushing you like this

*lukewarm_mess>> are you okay

Those three short private messages pulled something like a smile from Victor’s lips. Trust Mess to obey the letter of the law while doing what he thought was right behind the scenes.

He started tapping out a reply PM to reassure his friend that he was okay. Stopped. Decided, for once, to tell the truth.

/msg lukewarm_mess: no

/msg lukewarm_mess: I don’t think that I am okay

/msg lukewarm_mess: but I also don’t think that’s entirely Peach’s fault

SockPuppet: Now then.

SockPuppet: Before our safe space devolved into a school playground, I was trying to say that I thought the ideas that Peaches brought up might be worth discussing

*lukewarm_mess>> hmm. in that case…

*lukewarm_mess>> i seem to remember telling you about shoving a girl off my lap in a hospital waiting room full of people

SockPuppet: IF King was open to discussing them. He did not consent to an intervention.

*lukewarm_mess>> what was it you said to me?

SockPuppet: And now there has been bad behavior on both sides.

/msg lukewarm_mess: …

*lukewarm_mess>> (¬_¬;)

SockPuppet: So here’s what we’re going to do:

/msg lukewarm_mess: okay, okay

SockPuppet: KingElsa will decide whether Peaches_and_Dream crossed a line.

/msg lukewarm_mess: I told you that anxiety is a liar,

/msg lukewarm_mess: and that literally nobody with half a brain thinks that your’e weak

SockPuppet: If he did, then Peach will get a 3-day ban for being invasive

/msg lukewarm_mess: and that it’s okay to accept help when you need it

SockPuppet: and King will get a 1-day ban for ad hominem attacks

*lukewarm_mess>> so… and i ask this with love… can you take the advice that you dish out?

/msg lukewarm_mess: I also distinctly remember telling you that the little cow deserved to be dumped on her ass for tryig to take advangate of a coworker’s injury to put the moves ony ou.

SockPuppet: OR, and guess which option I prefer, King agrees to forgive your transgression, you both shake virtual hands or give internet hugs or whatever, and either decide to continue the conversation in a controlled and CIVIL manner or change the subject.

*lukewarm_mess>> not relevant

*lukewarm_mess> also she was not trying to put the moves on me

SockPuppet: I imagine there are a great number of sportsball games going on that we could be discussing instead

/msg lukewarm_mess: I guess I do have at least one person who can call me out on my shit

lukewarm_mess: BITE ME

SockPuppet: I

StandardDeviation: lolwut

lukewarm_mess: omg that was supposed to be a pm i’m so sorry

/msg lukewarm_mess: To me? D: D: D:

*lukewarm_mess>> nonono omg (/> / ᗣ / </ /)

Peaches_and_Dream: I only suggested we could discuss the results of the figure skating championships

lukewarm_mess: ψ (▼ へ ▼ メ) ~ → PEACH

SockPuppet: I CAN STILL KICKBAN YOU ALL

SockPuppet: A CHANNEL OF SILENT PERFECTION IS WITHIN MY GRASP

SockPuppet: DON’T THINK THAT I WON’T DO IT

/msg lukewarm_mess: Don’t like figure skating?

/msg lukewarm_mess: Or… secret fan?? (͡ ° ͜ʖ ͡ °)

*lukewarm_mess>> no changing the subject!

/msg lukewarm_mess: spoilsport

KingElsa: Um. Can I have the floor?

SockPuppet: You may.

KingElsa: So, um. I’m not exactly happy about being blindsided by this convo

KingElsa: but but as Socks said I also said some things atha I shouldn’t have

KingElsa: And I probably should hae said somethign earlier but I’m actually pretty drunk right now

*lukewarm_mess>> omg

KingElsa: so it’s an even wo2rse time than usual to try and call me out

*lukewarm_mess>> peach just spit out matcha through his nose

/msg lukewarm_mess: does it make me a horrible person if i find that a little satisfyring?

KingElsa: So if it’s up to me Id’ rather just channel my namesake and let it go

*lukewarm_mess>> haha no, i think that’s a healthy reaction to peach

Peaches_and_Dream: Oh shit, sorry king. I would never have jumped on you like that if I’d known you weren’t at 100%

SockPuppet: You shouldn’t have “jumped” on him at all. >.>

Peaches_and_Dream: yeah no, that’s fair. Fuck though. Sorry.

KingElsa: I’ll… think about hwat you said. later. But I will think about i8t

Peaches_and_Dream: ^^

StandardDeviation: hey socks, would you feel better if you kicked us all?

lukewarm_mess: ??

SockPuppet: You… have my attention.

StandardDeviation: and then we can all come back and start over fresh

Peaches_and_Dream: I… don’t actually hate that idea

KingElsa: I’ve been kicked out of finer establishements than this one *sniffs*

SockPuppet: This pleases me. Okay, then. Take five, children. Eat or go look out a window or something.

*Disconnected from #therapycouchfort (Quit: Kicked by SockPuppet)

To be continued...

#original conten #i have committed fanfiction #chat au #therapycouchfort #yuri on ice #victor nikiforov #christophe giacometti #katsuki yuuri #phichit chulanont #victuuri

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aaltohelsinki · 5 years

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Meet Aalto-Helsinki iGEM 2019 team!

It is time for the new Aalto-Helsinki team to finally take over the blog! For the last few months we have been pretty busy trying to come up with another brilliant idea, fundraising and meeting people. Now it is time for us to introduce ourselves to all of you.

Ilse

I am currently studying in the Translational Medicine MSc program at the University of Helsinki. I completed my Bachelor’s degree in Integrative Biology in the U.S. I am enthusiastic about innovations in healthcare and medicine. On my free time I enjoy all things outdoors and also coach track & field. I applied to iGEM because of the opportunity to work with a multidisciplinary team, and the opportunity to come up with a topic and project plan from the beginning. Great learning opportunity on so many levels! Besides working in the field of medical research, my dream job would be a sunset photographer.

What is your favourite breakfast food? My favourite breakfast food is pancakes. Especially oat-cardamom pancakes with berries and good coffee

What was the worst style choice you ever made? When I was younger I wanted to wear everything with flower print, so then all my clothes were of different flower prints and I’m not sure how stylish combo that ended up being

What is your favourite item you’ve bought this year? Bright light lamp. My artificial sun has gotten me through studying for so many exams during the winter

What’s your favourite tradition or holiday? Midsummer! Daylight all day and night with friends, sauna, swimming, grilled food, drinks, games & flower crowns. Is there anything better?

Noora

I have a Bachelor’s Degree in Biomedicine and currently studying a Master’s programme in Translational Medicine. I have some experience in biomedical research and bioentrepreneurship. My hobbies are bouldering and working out at the gym at times when I’m not busy figuring out how to solve all the problems in the world with science. I applied to iGEM because I am interested in gaining experience in planning and executing projects and interested in innovations in life sciences. My dream job is to work with improving healthcare and solving global problems in the field of life sciences.

If you could bring back any fashion trend what would it be? Comfy fleeces!

Coffee or tea? Coffee in the morning and decaf tea in the evening.

What is your favourite dessert? I have a really bad sweet tooth, my favourite dessert is anything that includes chocolate.

Miika

I have a Bachelor’s Degree in Biotechnology and Chemical Technology, and I am currently studying in a Master’s programme in Biosystems and Biomaterials Engineering at Aalto University. My hobbies include going to the gym and playing guitar. Life sciences obviously interest me and I thought that iGEM would be a unique chance to get to plan and execute a research project from scratch, as this kind of experience is hard to obtain otherwise, also getting a summer job on top of that is kind of superb. My dream job would be a stadiums out selling rockstar, but I’m afraid that that particular ship has sailed. So, the next best thing would be working with synthetic biology, health technologies and improve people’s quality of life with treatments and diagnostic methods.

What type of music do you listen to? All kind of growling and howling. I really enjoy thoroughly music of pretty much all kind, from electro pop to death metal. I’ve found that predictability is the enemy number one of any great music, so the more groove and hooks, the better!

If you had to eat one meal every day for the rest of your life what would it be? Starts with a P and ends in izza, I mean, there ain’t even other options to this really.

If you had a time machine, would go back in time or into the future? Easy. I’d check the numbers and go back in time to the the previous day of the biggest Eurojackpot lottery.

Do you separate your laundry into colors or just throw it all in together? I like to live dangerously.

Camilla

I am currently finishing my Bachelor’s Degree in Biotechnology and Chemical Technology at Aalto University. In the fall, I will start studying towards my Master’s Degree in Biosystems and Biomaterials Engineering. On my free time I enjoy being outside in the nature and spending time with my family, friends and dogs. I applied to iGEM because I have followed the former teams, and it looked like they had a lot of fun, and very interesting projects, so I thought it would be a very nice experience to be part of the 2019 team. I mean, who wouldn’t want to work together with an interdisciplinary team, where you get to ideate, plan and execute a synthetic biology project from the start to finish? I do as I think is sounds super interesting! My dream job would be any job in which I can somehow improve human health or do something good for the environment.

Seen anything lately that made you smile? Our super nice iGEM team and the beautiful spring weather.

If you had to delete all but 3 apps from your smartphone, which ones would you keep? Whatsapp, Photo Gallery and Spotify.

What is your favorite time of the day and why? My favourite time of the day is the morning because breakfast is my favourite meal of the day and I love taking long morning walks or runs in the nature at sunrise.

Teleportation or flying? Flying!

Amanda

I’m currently wrapping up my Master’s studies in Microbiology at the University of Helsinki. I have a Bachelor’s degree in the same subject. Currently I’m working on a project related to oil spill response, with the help of microbes! I also have some experience in medical microbiology. My hobbies include astanga yoga, climbing and ballroom dances. Also I enjoy spending time in nature. I applied to iGEM because I thought it would be a great opportunity to work in a multidisciplinary group and carry out a project from start to finish. Previous year’s projects have been very interesting, and it seemed like people have had a lot of fun. My dream job would be to improve the wellbeing of humans, animals and the environment with science.

Who’s someone you really admire? Dr. Jane Goodall (English primatologist and anthropologist). A big inspiration for me as a person and a scientist.

Do you collect anything? Tea mugs! I have LOTS of them! One can never have too many tea mugs.

What’s the most embarrassing fashion trend you used to rock? Flared pants (very very flared). I also had an awkward phase with huge skater shoes.

Neja

I am currently finishing my Bachelor’s degree in Chemistry at the University of Helsinki. In the fall I will start studying towards my Master’s degree in Translational Medicine. I have knowledge from various fields due to many different courses that I took during my Bachelor’s degree. On top of that I also have sufficient experiences in biomedical research. In my free time I can be found in the nature, hanging out with my friends, travelling the world or on one of many events that I helped organising. I grew up under the Alps and therefore hiking is one of my favourite hobbies. Whenever I get to visit home, conquering a new peak is on my must-do-list. I applied to iGEM because of my love for research and challenges. I believe it is a unique opportunity to perform a project from the beginning until the end and I am really excited to spend the summer in the lab working with so many wonderful people! My dream job would be something exciting as for example taking a part in new discoveries that have a potential to improve human or animal health or save the environment. I also love history and researching what has happened in the past would be another exiting path.

What was your favourite game to play as a child? Hide and seek. We would play it in the old mansion in my home town and it would sometimes take us hours to find everyone since there were so many small hidden places.

What’s the worst thing you ever did as a kid — and got away with? Me and my friends planned an escape from the kindergarten. We only reached the main road when we got scared and turned back. However no one has notice our little adventure even though we have missed half of the lunch.

What’s the grossest food you ever had to eat to be polite? Sausage filled with intestines in France.

Do you think you could live without your smartphone (or other technology item) for 24 hours? Definitely. I went camping to places without electricity or any other form of technology with my family or friends plenty of times. However it is always nice to have a camera on hand if you are camping somewhere especially beautiful and spectacular.

Antti

I’m studying Molecular Biosciences (BSc) at the University of Helsinki, gathering more information to make the impossible decision of choosing a more narrow field to focus on in the future. My previous studies were completely unrelated to biology (I did a little bit of flying), but I’d consider them as an interesting misstep on a wobbly path towards the real deal. What’s more important than science? In addition to hugging my copy of The Cell, I like reading, picking mushrooms and wondering. I applied to the team because iGEM seemed like a great opportunity to gain experience in applying scholarly knowledge in practice, while learning lots of other useful skills. Also it’s a step towards my ideal of being useful for fellow humans, other conscious organisms, and the environment.

What movie seen recently you would recommend and why? I enjoy films that contemplate the paradoxical nature of being human. One that’s been stuck in my head is a 2015 film set in the early stages of Algerian War called Far from Men. It’s also a good history lesson.

What fictional world or place would you like to visit? Moominvalley. Exactly the one that’s formed inside my head after reading Tove Jansson’s books.

What are you reading right now? Henri Lefebvre’s Critique of Everyday Life and Donna Tartt’s The Secret History.

Arina

I am currently majoring in Energy and Environmental Technology and minoring in Bioinformation Technology, Bachelor programs, at Aalto University. Previously I studied physics in Helsinki Open University. On my free time I love doing art, such as painting and drawing. I applied to Aalto-Helsinki iGEM team because of my interest in biology, medicine and new diagnostics and treatment options made possible by synthetic biology. I am a member in Aalto-Helsinki iGEM project with responsibilities in laboratory practising, data modelling and statistical analysis, and project website development. My dream job would be to become a scientific researcher.

What’s the best advice you’ve ever heard? Be yourself and love what you’re doing.

What type of coffee would you describe yourself as? Latte, because it’s my favorite type of coffee.

If you could pick up a new skill in an instant what would it be? Learning languages in seconds, because knowing them is super useful.

Ursula

I am currently studying Entrepreneurship & Innovation Management at Aalto University School of Business and minoring in Molecular Biosciences at the University of Helsinki. I am interested in healthcare innovations and improving the wellbeing of people’s lives. On my free time I enjoy all kind of sports and spending time with friends. I applied to iGEM because I felt that the project would combine many of my interests and values: biology, medicine and innovations as well as working with a team towards something meaningful. My dream job is to work with improving human health and wellbeing. Other than that, I would be a dog massage therapist.

What was your nickname(s) as a child? Uula by my sister (she had hard time pronouncing “r” and “s”...)

What is your most used emoji? The emoji with sunglasses

What was your least favourite food as a child? Do you still hate it or do you love it now? Liver casserole but loving it nowadays!

Tuomas

I am currently finishing BA in art conservation, I also have a degree in electronics from way back. I like tinkering with stuff such as 3D-printers etc. and I enjoy watching certain sports as well. In my free time I practice Muay Thai to keep fit, with less than stellar results. I’ve got two kids that are my biggest responsibility. I applied to iGEM to see the world and my dream job would be to become a King of Sealand.

What was the worst haircut you ever had? One I did myself on first grade. Let’s just say hair was missing from where it is traditionally understood to be.

What was your first job? When I was six, I walked up and down the back of this old lady that lived upstairs, like some kind of primitive child-chiropractor.

Seen any good movies lately you’d recommend? No.

Written by Neja Sirc

#aalto #helsinki #igem2019 #science #synbio #synthetic biology

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rickhorrow · 6 years

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18 FOR ‘18: TOP SPORTS STORIES OF 2018

18 FOR ‘18: RICK HORROW’S TOP SPORTS/BUSINESS/

TECHNOLOGY/PHILANTHROPY STORIES OF 2018 with Tanner Simkins

This past year in sports was full of gripping storylines and iconic events. We isolate some of the more unique happenings and their impact in our 18 for 2018 list.

The Golden State Warriors’ appearance in the NBA Finals has become expected. The Warriors have reached the Championship each of the past four seasons. Their 2018 sweep victory over the Cleveland Cavaliers brought them to their third championship in those four years and their first back-to-back O’Brien trophy. When winning is as plentiful as it has been for the Warriors, business booms for the team and its players as well. Steph Curry, Kevin Durant, and Klay Thompson all were in the top 10 last year for money earned in endorsements for NBA players.

Serena Williams accused Finals chair umpire Carlos Williams of sexism after her multiple outbursts at the 2018 U.S. Open. This became international news because of the impact of Williams on tennis and the polarizing debate that ensued with respect to sexism in sports and removal of any double-standards in tennis. The incident also drew attention away from first time U.S. Open winner Naomi Osaka, the first woman from Japan to win a Grand Slam singles title.

Tiger Woods won his first golf tournament since four back surgeries and renewed debate about whether he remains capable of breaking Jack Nicklaus’ record 18 Major victories. The season-ending Tour Championship Sunday at East Lake Golf Club in Atlanta was the first Woods victory at a professional golf tournament in more than five years. This was Woods’ 80th career PGA win — two short of the career record held by Sam Snead. Woods' last victory was in 2013 at the Bridgestone Invitational at Firestone Country Club in Akron, Ohio. Later in 2018, Woods and Phil Mickelson held a PPV special head to head match where Mickelson ousted Tiger after the match went into extra holes. As a result, Mickelson took home $9 million. Vegas odds makers currently have Woods at 25-1 to beat Nicklaus’ record.

University of Central Florida football fans will tell you they are National Champions from the season prior, and likely will push for that same recognition this year if the team keeps up their undefeated game streak. Debate like this was common during the BCS Championship years, but by 2018, the NCAA was supposed to have it figured out. The College Football Playoff system was designed to identify a true national champion. But with the success of UCF, perhaps the system isn’t as foolproof as it suggests. Does there need to be an eight-team tournament?

One year after the horrific Las Vegas shooting, the sports community is still proving to be a platform for healing and repair. “Our great state has shown the country and indeed the world what Vegas Strong is every day for nearly a year,” said Nevada Governor Brian Sandoval. “The events of 1 October affected so many and I think it is only right to show the world again how Vegas Strong Nevada is on the one year anniversary.” The NHL Las Vegas Golden Knights have completely bought into the VegasStrong movement, providing hope and a positive distraction to the still-recovering region.

Bryce Harper won the 2018 MLB Home Run Derby and solidified himself as a superstar. A six-time All-Star at the age of 25, Harper has established himself as one of the game's premier young stars. The 2015 National League Most Valuable Player Award winner had his breakout season at the age of 22. Coming off the Home Run Derby victory, Harper is baseball’s top free agent in 2018. This will likely yield him a $400 million dollar contract – the main reason he made our list.

High level athletics equal big time money – this year, college basketball added corruption and abuse into that mix. The FBI and other government agencies arrested NCAA basketball coaches, others close to NCAA programs, and Adidas representatives at the University of Arizona and elsewhere on various corruption and fraud charges including bribery, money laundering, and wire fraud. The investigation spread to reveal a much larger level of corruption, naming more than a dozen schools and over 25 current and former players as having been potentially implicated in the scandal. While there have been pay-to-play NCAA scandals in the past, what made this story unique was its size and breadth, in addition to the consequences. This was also the first time real jail time has ever been a factor in collegiate corruption scandals.

HBO Sports dropped boxing both from a coverage and PPV revenue perspective. This headline was easy to miss if you do not follow this sports media vertical, but its weight on boxing’s decline cannot be overstated. MMA, on the other hand, has been on the rise with coverage extending into new markets and new networks like ESPN. But for combat sports in general, the new-age coverage and subscription approach of networks like DAZN (which made headlines by signing Canelo Alvarez to a five-year, $365 million fight deal) seem to be the future and the final blow to PPV as we know it.

NASCAR celebrated its 70th season in decline. The anniversary came amidst the fourth year of its current 10-year television contract with Fox Sports and NBC Sports and the third year of a five-year race sanctioning agreement with all tracks. But who really cares? With TV ratings and race attendance on the wane, NASCAR in many ways remains mostly a sport for B2B plays and only its most diehard fans.

Sports in 2018 continued to be a platform for protest, change, and political platforms. From athletes, coaches, and team owners supporting candidates during the November midterms to powerful hashtag campaigns to retracted championship invitations to the White House, sports continued to be firmly entrenched in the national political scene. Whether this is right or wrong, it seems that sports has become a vehicle for these debates. When these hot button issues interfere with fan enjoyment, what will the effect on viewership be? Just ask the NFL and they will tell you this is no easy issue to navigate. One clear 2018 political victory for all that was heavily influenced by pro athlete voices: the December 14 passage of The First Step Act, Congress’ bipartisan criminal justice reform bill.

The business of esports continued to accelerate in 2018 and doesn’t show any signs of slowing down. Total prize money in 2018 across all major esports games was nearly $150 million, with a total of 3,261 high-level tournaments and 18,016 professional players. The global esports economy is around $900 million, with brands contributing about ⅔ of this. According to a report by Newzoo, the global esports audience will reach 380 million this year, made up of 165 million esports enthusiasts and 215 million occasional viewers.

The nationwide legalization of sports betting has been a gradual process that exploded in 2018. This year, New Jersey, Delaware, Mississippi, New Mexico, West Virginia, Pennsylvania, and Rhode Island joined Nevada in offering legal sports wagering in some form, in the wake of New Jersey’s U.S. Supreme Court victory that paved the way. All seven newly legal gaming states are seeing tens of millions of dollars in new tax revenues as a result, with those numbers increasing exponentially every month. As sports gambling becomes more widespread, surrounding businesses like big data, new-age sportsbooks, and gamification apps and platforms will continue to boom.

Sports continues to have a unique power to inspire and motivate positive change. 2018 had some memorable philanthropic standouts, such as LeBron James opening the I Promise School in Ohio, insurance leader Group1001 continuing to champion the LPGA Indy Women In Tech Championship and related initiatives for girls, and online education platform EVERFI partnering with young IndyCar driver Zach Veach and Andretti Autosport on the Endeavor STEM education program, just to name a few. More personally, we continue to be proud of our monthly “Power of Sports” TV program, carried by Fox Sports RSNs nationwide and highlighting standout team community service initiatives, athletes giving back, and sports facilities being built in underserved communities across America.

Content will always be king. This was cemented even further in 2018 as we saw OTT content proliferate on mobile apps, tablets, streaming devices, Smart TVs, and all the latest tech. In short, from now on every piece of hardware manufactured with the capability of viewing content will have accompanying software providing it. This is a pivotal time for content providers both inside and outside of sports to either get with the program or get phased out.

USA Gymnastics filed for bankruptcy in the wake of the Larry Nassar scandal. Late in the year, the organization continues to attempt to reach settlements over abuse. Out of Michigan State, Nassar served as USA Gymnastics’ national team doctor and was accused of molesting at least 250 girls including a number of well-known Olympic gymnasts, dating as far back as 1992. The USOC has taken steps to revoke the status of USAG with superstars such as Simone Biles supporting the move. Olympic medalists such as McKayla Maroney and Aly Raisman not only helped to blow the whistle on the disgusting scandal but continue to be voices of power for all victims.

LeBron James’ move to Los Angeles was the lead NBA headline until the season tipped off. James’ long term impact on the Lakers franchise and his personal entertainment empire remain to be seen. But in his first year with the team, there have been personnel growing pains on the court and also tremendous growth for LeBron’s brand (specifically in the content space). James has made it to the NBA Finals nine times, including each of the last eight seasons. His overall record in the Finals is 3 wins and 6 losses. Will the Lakers bring home the Championship? Anything short of that would be a failure if you ask LeBron.

University of Maryland football player Jordan McNair tragically passed away from a heatstroke, spurring further debate on athlete healthcare and well-being. The offensive lineman showed signs of extreme exhaustion after running a series of sprints at a Maryland football practice. After evaluating McNair at the on-campus football facility, EMT responders reported a male patient with a seizure, and McNair was transported to Washington Adventist Hospital, according to the 911 call. He later was moved to Cowley Shock Trauma Center in Baltimore, where he died June 13. The incident led to the firing of head football coach D.J. Durkin, the resignation of the university’s board chairman, and a reexamination of heatstroke prevention tactics at all levels of outdoor sports.

Internationally, 2018 saw mega events like the PyeongChang Olympic Games and the FIFA World Cup. This was the first time that South Korea had hosted the Winter Olympics and the second Olympics held in the country overall, after the 1988 Summer Olympics in Seoul. It was the third time that an East Asian country had hosted the Winter Games, after Sapporo (1972) and Nagano (1998), both in Japan. It was also the first of three consecutive Olympics to be held in East Asia, the other two being the 2020 Summer Olympics in Tokyo and the 2022 Winter Olympics in Beijing. The FIFA World Cup came and went with less controversy than the 2014 event, but debate is already heated around the 2022 Qatar World Cup both from a political and athlete safety (read: high temperatures) perspective.

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lawfultruth · 5 years

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Guest Post: The Bitcoin Plague Spreads to Retail

John Reed Stark

In recent days, a number of leading retailers have announced that they are initiating processes to allow consumers to complete purchase transactions using bitcoin or other cryptocurrencies. In the following guest post, John Reed Stark, President of John Reed Stark Consulting and former Chief of the SEC’s Office of Internet Enforcement, takes a look at these developments in the retail industry. A version of this article originally appeared on Securities Docket. I would like to thank John for allowing me to publish his article as a guest post on this site. I welcome guest post submissions from responsible authors on topics of interest to this site’s readers. Please contact me directly if you would like to submit a guest post. Here is John’s article.

*********************

Warren Buffett, perhaps the most celebrated investor ever known, refers to bitcoin as “rat poison squared.” I disagree. Bitcoin is worse than rat poison – it is more akin to the plague and mayhem that rats can spread if not properly contained. Now, the bitcoin plague has spread to U.S. shopping malls.

Thanks to a new initiative, several big name retailers, including Crate and Barrel, Nordstrom, and Amazon-owned Whole Foods, according to Fortune, will now reportedly accept bitcoin and three other types of digital currency.

At first glance, creating cryptocurrency payment arrangements for retail products might seem like a no-brainer, falling squarely in line with classic, basic and critical marketing principles. Consider all the benefits:

What better way to attract customers than to create a financially friendly environment where a customer’s cryptocurrency fanaticism is enthusiastically embraced;

Sharing the excitement of cryptocurrency offers a unique chance to bond with tech-savvy customers, especially those beyond borders;

The medium can become the message. By accepting cryptocurrency as payment, a retailer is demonstrating its commitment to creativity, modernization and originality – traits that customers might appreciate and find compelling;

Payment flexibility can attract business in and of itself. Given that accepting debit and credit cards online can make a retailer more appealing to current and potential customers, so too can accepting other forms of payment, including cryptocurrencies; and

Retailers can take advantage of the chance to demonstrate tangible support for a client’s libertarian financial preferences. By “putting your money where your mouth is,” retailers can prove themselves true believers in the future of technology-driven digital currency, setting themselves apart from their scribe competitors who remain content to observe the crypto-revolution from the safety and shelter of the sidelines.

But despite all of the crypto-hoopla, retailers should ignore the Marketing 101 crypto-lesson blather set forth above. Given its complete and utter lack of oversight and meaningful licensure, the cryptocurrency marketplace has spawned a growing global cadre of dangerous criminals, and the risks for retailers accepting cryptocurrency run a perilous gamut of legal, regulatory, financial, ethical and reputational dangers.

In short, accepting cryptocurrency from customers in today’s crypto-manic environment is, despite all of the high-tech allure, just not worth it – and a glaring exemplar of commercial ignorance; opportunistic corporate pandering; and sadly, plain old-fashioned executive avarice.

The Dark Side of Cryptocurrency

Need a fake I.D., a bottle of opiates, a cache of credit card numbers or a thousand social security numbers? Need a way to collect a ransomware payment? Need to fund terrorist-related activities? Need to hire a hitman? Need to finance an election tampering scheme? Cryptocurrencies like bitcoin have become the payment method of choice for these, and a slew of other, criminal enterprises.

What exactly is bitcoin? Bitcoin is a virtual or digital currency that uses encryption techniques for governance and security and operates independent of any central bank. A token is a digital asset that can be used in many ways — for example, as a unit of value (or as means of providing access to and transactional value inside a particular blockchain system (e.g., retail allows access to electronic data storage space in Sia’s blockchain ecosystem). Tokens are built on top of blockchain technology, a form of distributive ledger technology, which is a digital database that is consensually shared and synchronized across networks spread across multiple sites, institutions or geographies.

Transactions in cryptocurrencies like bitcoin are pseudo-anonymous, encrypted and decentralized by nature, offering a convenient method of transferring funds obtained from illegal activities without an audit trail. Cryptocurrencies also operate outside of traditional and established financial networks and are alarmingly unregulated. There is no central issuer of bitcoins, nor a Federal Reserve of Bitcoins monitoring and tracking transactions or controlling their value. In short, government surveillance and regulation of cryptocurrency is virtually nonexistent (no pun intended).

Thus, it should come as no surprise that bitcoin can trace its origins with criminals in the dark web marketplace. Indeed, cryptocurrency and criminal activity have remained inexorably linked ever since the 2011 launching of The Silk Road, who began using bitcoin as its main currency in their virtual marketplace for buying and selling drugs, weapons, and all things illicit on the dark web. Until shut down by law enforcement in 2013 and then again in 2014 and finally going offline in 2017 due to loss of funding, Silk Road served as a glaring example of the crimes so easily facilitated by cryptocurrency (in 2015 Silk Road’s creator, Ross Ulbricht, was sentenced to life in prison).

After Silk Road was shut down, bitcoin’s price plummeted, and many crypto-pundits expected bitcoin demand to dry up. But in the following years, the opposite seemed to happen. Recent data from Kapersky CiperTrace shows criminals have laundered $2.5 billion worth of criminally utilized bitcoin through cryptocurrency exchanges, and almost all of it ends up in countries with lax Anti-Money-Laundering (AML) and Know Your Customer (KYC) regulations. The data, which spans from January 2009 to September 2018, indicates 97 percent of the bitcoin laundered through cryptocurrency trading platforms ends up in countries with lenient AML regulations. Kapersky CiperTrace deemed transactions to be of criminal nature if they came directly from, or with close connection to, sources such as “dark market sites, extortion, malware, mixer/tumbler/money laundering, ransomware, and terrorist financing services.”

Though bitcoin traversed from the digital to physical world with the first-ever bitcoin ATM at a Vancouver coffee shop in 2013, bitcoin’s use as a real currency has not truly caught on as a legitimate means of payment. Bitcoin ATMs remain mysterious, suspicious and enigmatic to say the least. Meanwhile the U.S. government has never recognized bitcoin as a currency – rather, bitcoin and all other cryptocurrencies are simply property or, as lawyers would say, chattel.

Spotlight: Cryptocurrency and Ransomware Extortion Schemes

One of the more prominent criminal uses of bitcoin involves so-called “ransomware” schemes and provides a definitive example of how nefarious cryptocurrency has become.

Insurer Beazley Group in its May 2019 Beazley Breach Insights Report (BBR) claims its clients have reported twice the number of ransomware cyberattacks in the first quarter of 2019 as they did last year, with hackers targeting bigger companies and demanding bigger ransoms than ever before. The size of demands is also growing. According to the May 2019 BBR, in Q1 2019, the average ransomware demand reported to the BBR Services team was $224,871, an increase of 93% over the 2018 average of $116,324. Here is how a typical ransomware extortion scheme works:

Ransomware attackers break into a corporate system and encrypt, or lock-up, a corporate victim’s data. Most ransomware infections come from phishing attacks, in which unwitting users are enticed to open a file or click on a link containing the ransomware malware;

The ransomware attackers demand payment in cryptocurrency for the encryption key to enable the victim corporation to unlock the now inaccessible data;

The ransomware victim pays the cryptocurrency ransom to the attacker; and

The ransomware attackers move on to their next victim.

While ransomware attacks come in many forms, in each case they infect a computer and restrict users’ access to certain data, systems, and files, until a ransom is paid. A few particularly disturbing statistics about ransomware:

A new organization will fall victim to ransomware every 14 seconds in 2019, and every 11 seconds by 2021;

1.5 million new phishing sites are created every month;

Ransomware attacks have increased over 97 percent in the past two years;

34% of businesses hit with malware took a week or more to regain access to their data;

Cryptocurrency payments made to ransomware attackers increased nearly 90 percent in Q1 2019 over the previous quarter, according to Coveware’s latest report; and

In 2019 ransomware from phishing emails increased 109 percent over 2017.

What makes ransomware attacks so devastating is that many variants do not simply target individual endpoints, but rather establish a foothold on one device and then fan out across a corporate network, encrypting everything from shared drives and email servers to website platforms and backup servers. In this way, ransomware attackers can cripple significant portions, or even all, of a company’s technologically facilitated operations. Hence ransomware’s dirty little secret: most corporations pay the ransom.

How do most corporate victims of ransomware attacks pay the ransoms demanded? Bitcoin of course – it’s fast, reliable, verifiable, subject to little regulation, and virtually untraceable. Bitcoin is ideal for ransomware extortion schemes. The hacker can simply watch the public blockchain to know if and when a victim has paid up. Hackers can even create a unique payment address for each victim and automate the process of unlocking their files upon a confirmed bitcoin transaction to that unique address.

Unlike the sequence of events during a kidnapping scenario, where the exchange of money arguably places criminals in their most vulnerable position, ransomware attackers facilitate pseudo-anonymity by orchestrating a bitcoin transaction process. Rarely is there ever even an arrest, let alone a successful prosecution, of a ransomware attacker. Law enforcement remains virtually powerless, and has even fallen victim themselves to ransomware extortion schemes. Ransomware attackers have become yet another class of cybercriminal who continue to enrich themselves while, for the most part, law enforcement can only watch from the sidelines.

Once the ransomware attackers take possession of the bitcoin payment, it can now be laundered via the Dark Web – that is, until now. Now, ransomware attackers might have a new and better money laundering option: using ransomware proceeds to buy a pint of avocado ice cream at Whole Foods; a Nantucket Rug at Crate and Barrel or a Zegna Quindici Tie at Nordstrom’s.

Isn’t Cash Equally as Dangerous as Bitcoin and Other Cryptocurrencies?

Bitcoin and other crypto-fanatics argue that criminals can use cash just as easily as they can use bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies to commit crimes. After all, in comparison to bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies, isn’t cash similarly anonymous; untraceable; and fungible? The answer is no – which is precisely why bitcoin has evolved into the currency of choice for criminals.

First off, in the U.S., pursuant to the Bank Secrecy Act (BSA), transactions involving traditional financial firms, such as banks, brokers and dealers, and money service businesses (MSBs), are subject to strict federal and state anti-money laundering laws and regulations aimed at detecting and reporting suspicious activity, including money laundering and terrorist financing, as well as securities fraud and market manipulation.

AML programs typically include a system of internal controls to ensure ongoing compliance with the BSA; independent testing of BSA/AML compliance; a designated BSA compliance officer to oversee compliance efforts; training for appropriate personnel; and a customer identification program. Thus, to ensure AML compliance, financial firms start by obtaining clearly identifiable information about a prospective client, and identifying any potential risks of association. This makes engaging in cash-related crimes challenging. Given in particular the tremendous technological innovation at financial institutions, moving or warehousing cash without detection and surveillance has become significantly challenging.

The same is not necessarily true for cryptocurrency transactions. Cryptocurrency transactions can create challenging hurdles for law enforcement to identify criminals. Theoretically, anyone with an Internet connection and a digital wallet can be part of any cryptocurrency platform, initial coin offering or other cryptocurrency financing endeavor operating anywhere on the globe – which, of course, opens the laundry room door for those with criminal motives.

For example, in July, 2018, special counsel Robert Mueller indicted twelve Russian intelligence officials for allegedly attempting to influence U.S. elections in 2016. The indictment notes that the conspirators used bitcoin to fund the purchase of servers, register domains, and make other payments “in furtherance of hacking activity.” According to the indictment, the “use of bitcoin allowed the Conspirators to avoid direct relationships with traditional financial institutions, allowing them to evade greater scrutiny of their identities and sources of funds.”

The same rationale of secrecy and pseudo-anonymity unfortunately applies to terrorism financing. For instance, the Palestinian military-political group Hamas, which the U.S. government deems a terrorist organization, may be using the Coinbase cryptocurrency exchange for fundraising. Similarly, in December 2017, a woman was arrested in New York for allegedly obtaining $62,000 in bitcoin to send to Islamic State. Around the same time, an Islamic State-affiliated Darknet site called Isdarat sought bitcoin contributions from supporters.

Wildly Absurd and Oft Manipulated Crypto-Valuations

In addition to becoming a facilitator for cryptocurrency transactions, by accepting cryptocurrency from customers, retailers are also indirectly endorsing cryptocurrency’s oft manipulated and wholly unregulated farcical valuations.

In fact, the criminalities associated with cryptocurrency’s use are almost as egregious and disturbing as the criminalities associated with its valuations. Bitcoin and other cryptocurrency’s anarchistic valuations remain generally unregulated and without any meaningful oversight, leaving them easily susceptible to fraud and chicanery by insiders, management and better-informed traders and market participants.

For example, researchers from the University of Texas found that manipulation in the cryptocurrency market is rampant and much of the run-up in Bitcoin’s price during 2017 was due to manipulation orchestrated by the Hong Kong exchange Bitfinex. In a 66-page paper, the authors found that tether was used to buy bitcoin at key moments when it was declining, which helped “stabilize and manipulate” the cryptocurrency’s price.

More Illiquidity, Fraud and Manipulation Risks

For retailers to willingly subject themselves to bitcoin’s sinister and stealthy environment of illiquidity, fraud and manipulations makes little sense. Here’s why:

The logistics of accepting cryptocurrency are unique, complicated and problematic. It is not as if a retailer can stroll across the street and convert cryptocurrency to U.S. dollars, record the data in a firm’s accounting software, and be back in time for lunch. First, the retailer must identify a reliable and trustworthy financial institution to safeguard the cryptocurrency (and to convert the cryptocurrency upon demand. Where to find this kind of honorable, respected and U.S. financial institution? Not among Wall Street’s traditional ranks of federally registered, regulated and monitored reliable institutions.

The institutions servicing cryptocurrency clients are barely in their infancy. For the typical cryptocurrency trading platform, there is no central regulatory authority; no state or federal team of bank auditors and compliance experts scrutinizing transactions and policing for manipulation; no existing federal licensure – it’s not just the Wild West, it’s global economic anarchy.

Cryptocurrency intermediaries often give the impression to investors that they are regulated or meet the regulatory standards of national securities exchanges and that their operations are similarly transparent, reliable, trustworthy and bonafide. This is not true.

Although some of these platforms claim to use strict standards to pick only high-quality digital assets to trade, the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC), the primary regulator of securities exchanges, does not review these standards or the digital assets that the platforms select, and the so-called standards should not be equated to the listing standards of national securities exchanges.

Likewise, the SEC does not review the trading protocols used by these platforms, which determine how orders interact and execute, and access to a platform’s trading services may not be the same for all users. Again, investors should not assume the trading protocols meet the standards of an SEC-registered national securities exchange.

Along the same lines, cryptocurrency trading platforms claiming to abide by AML, KYC and other similar safety standards and protocols are nothing like registered banks, national exchanges, broker-dealers. Given the identification and verification challenges associated with the global locations, pseudo-anonymity and historically criminal tendencies of typical cryptocurrency users, AML, KYC and other similar compliance procedures have little in common with the sophisticated technological compliance infrastructure at traditional U.S. financial institutions.

For instance, the U.S. Department of Justice (DOJ) announced in April of 2019, that it has charged two individuals with bank fraud in connection to a system for depositing funds to cryptocurrency trading platforms. In a statement, the U.S. Attorney’s Office for the Southern District of New York alleged that Reginald Fowler of Arizona and Ravid Yosef, said to live in Tel Aviv, Israel, were part of a scheme that involved using bank accounts to move money into a series of unnamed cryptocurrency trading platforms.

Similarly, on April 26, 2019, after New York’s attorney general accused the owners of a prominent cryptocurrency trading platform, Bitfinex, of using illicit transactions to mask $850 million in missing funds. According to a 23-page legal filing, Bitfinex raided the reserves of a so-called stablecoin called Tether — a digital currency purportedly backed one-to-one by U.S. dollars—in order to pay out customers demanding withdrawals from the platform.

The New York AG filing also reproduces messages written by a Bitfinex executive which plead for capital from a Panamanian payment processor to which it had transferred funds. The exact identity of the Panamanian payment processor, Crypto Capital, is unclear. According to the attorney general, Bitfinex, which is incorporated in the British Virgin Islands, relied on a shadowy network of money agents, including “human being friends of Bitfinex employees that were willing to use their bank accounts to transfer money to Bitfinex clients.”

Thus, for the most part, the various financial intermediaries operating within the cryptocurrency marketplace typically:

Are not registered with any federal government agency and has no liquidity, net capital or other depository or financial requirements of any kind;

Are not examined or audited by any federal agency such as the Federal Reserve or the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC);

Are not regulated by any quasi-government agency such as the Financial Industry Regulatory Authority (FINRA).

Warehouse property such as bitcoin (bitcoin is not recognized as an official currency), which is not insured by any federal agency, such as the Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation;

Do not have any federal accounting requirements with respect to their assets;

Do not report their financial condition in any form of official SEC filing, such as an annual report or Form 10-K;

Do not have any federal record-keeping requirements with respect to their operations, communications or any other aspect of its business;

Would assert that they have no specific federal requirements regarding the pricing of any cryptocurrency trading transaction, the use of employees of its payment systems or any federal anti-manipulation requirements; and

Would assert that they do not have the same federal compliance systems or code of conduct requirements of traditional financial institutions such as banks, investment companies, brokerages and other financial firms, who spend millions of dollars every year on internal compliance infrastructure and customer-protection-related infrastructure.

The bottom line: cryptocurrency financial marketplaces tend to believe that they have no federal licensing requirements to meet the bulk of the vigorous federal safeguards historically rooted and associated with U.S. financial institution registration and regulation. These standards and practices, formulated after decades of scrutiny, analysis and enquiry, are the hallmark of U.S. financial institutions.

Currently, when a customer has a problem with a cryptocurrency transaction, there also exists no established federal government watchdog, which causes further enforcement consternation. To exacerbate matters, typical cryptocurrency transactions are by definition irreversible – no anti-fraud guarantee from a financial institution and no reversing the charges, if any dispute or problem arises.

And even if there was a formal federal regulatory complaint filing structure, the pseudo-anonymous nature of virtual currencies, ease of cross-border and interstate transport, and the lack of a formal banking edifice creates enormous challenges for law enforcement to investigate and apprehend any individuals who use cryptocurrencies for illegal activities.

Price Volatility Risks

For retailers accepting bitcoin, they are encouraging their customers to take on tremendous price volatility risks.

Bitcoin started a decade ago but gained status as a household name during its 1,300 percent price rise and march to nearly $20,000 last year. Because the cryptocurrency’s value can vary drastically in a single day, its unprecedented volatility creates serious challenges to using bitcoin as a method of payment for retailers.

For instance, since January, bitcoin has fallen roughly 70 percent and recently fell below $3,500 for the first time in 14 months, losing 30 percent in over seven days. Bitcoin recovered slightly afterwards but continues to experience dramatic, unpredictable and startling price swings.

Enabling retail customers to pay via bitcoin is a not-so-subtle endorsement encouraging them to invest in bitcoin – which is replete with too many risks to mention, and seems irresponsible for any U.S. corporation.

Cybersecurity Risk

Transacting in bitcoin for a retailer and its customers carries with it extraordinary cybersecurity risk. Bitcoin’s true believers tout that cryptocurrencies provide a safe and secure way of making payments, but rarely have a clue as to how they work.

In 2016, hackers stole $72 million worth of bitcoin from exchange Bitfinex. And in 2018, hackers stole $500 million in digital tokens from exchange Coincheck. Binance, one of the largest cryptocurrency trading platforms in the world, just announced that hackers stole $40 million worth of bitcoin from them using a phishing and virus scheme, in what the company described as a “large scale security breach.” According to the Wall Street Journal, more than $1.7 billion in cryptocurrency has been stolen over the years, most of which has come from exchanges and been centered around Asia.

Hackers have now become virtual bank robbers – except their break-ins can be done thousands of miles away from a dark and quiet basement, and then launder the proceeds through various digital wallets or their friendly neighborhood U.S. retailer.

Renowned security technologist Bruce Scheier explains in clear and simple terms the cybersecurity risks of cryptocurrency, emphasizing bitcoin’s (and blockchain’s) regulatory and enforcement vacuum:

“If your bitcoin exchange gets hacked, you lose all of your money. If your bitcoin wallet gets hacked, you lose all of your money. If you forget your login credentials, you lose all of your money. If there’s a bug in the code of your smart contract, you lose all of your money. If someone successfully hacks the blockchain security, you lose all of your money. In many ways, trusting technology is harder than trusting people.”

Say it Ain’t So Whole Foods

Benevolently branded Whole Foods seems the most incongruous of these purported crypto-friendly retailers. Loyal Whole Foods Market customers laud the company’s commitment to minimally processed products free of certain artificial ingredients, and foods that contain nitrates, harmful pesticides, artificial colors, antibiotics, and hormones. Whole Foods farmed seafood standards are the highest in the industry: antibiotics, growth hormones, preservatives like sulfites and phosphates, genetically-modified seafood, and land animal by-products in feed are all prohibited.

Several times a year, each Whole Foods holds “5% days,” where five percent of that day’s net sales goes to support local education, hospitals or non-profits. Whole Foods Market also sets an example in its use of wind power, solar power, company-wide recycling programs, green buildings for their stores, etc. Whole Foods markets their benevolence aggressively — and consumers love it.

But by accepting cryptocurrency, Whole Foods would be assisting in the growth of an increasingly sophisticated, dangerous and terrorist-minded gang of global criminals – which to me, seems far more menacing than the threats posed by genetically-modified seafood or feed containing land animal by-products.

Looking Ahead

Bitcoin resides amid a libertarian financial realm of competing bandits. That is why, ironically, one of bitcoin’s most useful criminal attributes is its use for the theft of other bitcoin. Retailers should think twice before lending an aura of legitimacy to bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies, and consider carefully their role in supporting cryptocurrency growth and encouraging cryptocurrency use.

In the history of financial innovation, modernization and invention, there has always existed one constant: whatever the product, criminals will attempt to exploit its application. Bitcoin dramatically illustrates this axiom. Yet despite the treacherous reality of bitcoin’s predominant use, retail apparently wants in. It would seem that retailers have become so desperate for market share that they will resort to enabling terrorism, extortion and other criminalities.

It’s not just that bitcoin-friendly retailers have given little consideration to the myriad of victims of crypto-funded ransomware, terrorism, drug dealing and the like. Cryptocurrency’s liquidity risk; price volatility; cybersecurity vulnerabilities; commission fees; AML implications; ethical dilemmas; tax burdens; entanglement mishaps and the rest, create a situation that could be unmanageable or even untenable for a retailer’s shareholders, partners, affiliates and other fiduciaries. Not to mention that for the most part, the entire cryptocurrency system resides amid an unregulated, mysterious and sinister environment – a patently poor choice of virtual venue.

Cryptocurrencies purport to be items of inherent value (similar, for instance, to cash or gold) that are designed to enable purchases, sales and other financial transactions, and promise to provide many of the same functions as long-established currencies such as the U.S. dollar, euro or Japanese yen. But retailers should not be fooled.

Cryptocurrencies are mere computer-generated chattel, and Whole Foods, Nordstrom and Crate and Barrel should not agree to accept chattel from customers as consideration for their purchases. We are not living in the 1800s and this is not Deadwood, South Dakota.

Don’t get me wrong, the blockchain technology on which cryptocurrencies are based may turn out to be the most exciting, disruptive, transformative and efficiency enhancing breakthrough since sliced bread. But aside from complex issues of privacy, security, ethics and simple practicality, blockchain technology remains embryonic; has still yet to be proven; and happens to reside amid an economic ecosystem rife with fraud, deceit, dishonesty and thievery. Bitcoin is arguably blockchain’s most celebrated accomplishment yet much of bitcoin’s value, outside of mere speculation, is derived solely from its ability to facilitate criminal activity.

Moreover, just because some mythical engineer has discovered a potentially revolutionary manner to engage in and verify commercial transactions (e.g. replacing a traditional corporate entry recorded in an intermediary institution’s centralized ledger with a virtual entry recorded on a blockchain’s decentralized distributed ledger), it does not mean that criminals should be permitted to create their own form of currency to use to commit robbery, theft, extortion and even murder.

I can appreciate that bitcoin investors are merely ascribing to the historically proven greater fool theory, betting that there will always be a “greater fool” in the cryptocurrency marketplace poised to pay a price based on higher valuation for an already overvalued bitcoin. But the inherent scourge of bitcoin is an altogether different story. For retailers, where reputation is so critical, the risks of somehow becoming ensnared or even merely associating with the dark and seedy underbelly of cryptocurrency are considerable.

Director of the SEC Enforcement Division from 1974 to 1981; general counsel to the Central Intelligence Agency from 1981 to 1985; and U.S. District Court Judge for the District of Columbia from 1985 to 2000, famed Judge Stanley Sporkin put it best when he said, “When you lie down with dogs, you wake up with fleas.”

When it comes to bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies, the so-called “fintech” lawyers advising retailers contemplating crypto-cash registers should take heed of Judge Sporkin’s enduring admonition. Fintech legal advice should be plain and simple: bitcoin is a plague, so stay as far away from it as you can.

_________________________

John Reed Stark is president of John Reed Stark Consulting LLC, a data breach response and digital compliance firm. Formerly, Mr. Stark served for almost 20 years in the Enforcement Division of the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission, the last 11 of which as Chief of its Office of Internet Enforcement. He currently teaches a cyber-law course as a Senior Lecturing fellow at Duke Law School. Mr. Stark also worked for 15 years as an Adjunct Professor of Law at the Georgetown University Law Center, where he taught several courses on the juxtaposition of law, technology and crime, and for five years as managing director of global data breach response firm, Stroz Friedberg, including three years heading its Washington, D.C. office. Mr. Stark is the author of “The Cybersecurity Due Diligence Handbook.”

The post Guest Post: The Bitcoin Plague Spreads to Retail appeared first on The D&O Diary.

Guest Post: The Bitcoin Plague Spreads to Retail syndicated from https://ronenkurzfeldweb.wordpress.com/

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