#I was willing to pay for horse riding therapy lessons or now a service dog myself
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I hate this fucking system so much.
#I've been looking for help in form of many different kind of therapies for months now - MONTHS#and I haven't even gotten on 1 (ONE!) single waiting list#and that's not just from regular insurance covered therapists#I was willing to pay for horse riding therapy lessons or now a service dog myself#but they all don't even have an open waiting list anymore#I mean what else am I supposed to do now?#I need some form of therapy really badly#and asking for help again and again is difficult enough when I have barely any energy for all those phone calls#but getting rejected again and again?#it's the absolute worst feeling.#like I am here somehow trying to get my hopes up again and again in order to be able to reach out for help again and again#and they're always getting crushed again and again#how am I supposed to not despair especially with depression?#how is it possible that the only thing I hear is to 'try again next year' when I'm having acute problems?#I mean no one tells someone who broke their leg that all the doctors don't have any appointments left anymore#and that they should just try to reach out again next year#I just can't anymore#I don't know what else to do#I'm just like screaming here asking for help#and not only is no one helping but everyone is refusing to do so
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