#I’ll post the full thing tomorrow but ahhhhh I’m so proud of myself

[theaologies]

ok part of me is like change it to an anatomically correct bone because this kind of looks like a goofy dick but the other part is like that’s what makes it good god could you imagine how relentlessly this would be mocked in universe

[wolfguy13-blog]

"Future me I haven't met, there's gonna be some pain. It's good to feel something."

When I look back at this year’s posts I’ll chalk them up to emotional instability due to being in my last year. (At the moment it still feels like the real deal sadly lol). I’ll admit I asked for these stupid emotions. After spending 2-3 years as emotionally hollow in university I used to pray that I feel my emotions when I’m in Canada and that’s exactly what happened and I’m back to being a frickin hormonal teenager again. Bro, you’re 23 stop receding back to 17. Sigh. What will I do with myself. Future me promise me you won’t regret asking for this because you now have it full force!!

Anyways, I spent yesterday working on my assignment for HR and then went to dinner and a movie with Ari after law class. We saw justice league! We all know I went for my fav. Superman and he didn’t disappoint this time like B vs S which was basically Bs. No pun intended. I liked the movie, but like I would give it a solid 7/10. The first avengers was better lol. We went to the keg later and had appetisers. OH WAIT I HAD ESCARGOT ACCIDENTALLY BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST MUSHROOMS. ILL GET YOU BACK FOR THIS ARI!! I was really tired yesterday though and once again Mr. Rui invaded my thoughts because I was invited to a wings night by the jsa and I looked at whether he was going or not. Wow. So stupid I am. And then I posted a story on Instagram and he saw it. This low key annoyed me because 1. He doesn’t use Instagram and 2. Why do I care? I was just pissed at myself again for thinking so much about him again. Like just leave my mind in peace please. But he didn’t. I even thought of sending him a message at night asking if he went but came to my senses and didn’t send it. What is wrong with meeeeee someone snap me out of this please. I’ll pay you. Ugh. I decided to send out a study offer and then decided i would do it spontaneously on Friday but… Like casually.

I don’t have anyone to hang out with on Saturday so I’m just feeling lonely and Alice won’t be here and neither would Ari. Lol. Maybe I’ll invite Jessie? He seems more likely to come and more fond of me anyways ahaha. (We all known I’m gonna message Rui first smh) *insert disappointed face gif here* I can’t believe my mood went down after dinner but I was tired and sat outside in the lounge thank God because I was just gonna be sad in my room alone in my bed. I called Alice out and casually talking with a her made me feel better. Then I joked that she can go to bed and I’ll go cry over Rui. Even my jokes are about him now. AHHHHH FUCKIN ELL.

Enough of that, today I actually accomplished something! I stayed in bed till 11:40pm and then I did a bit of my assignment and went to the gym. In my 22 *cough* 23 years of life I’ve never been able to do a pull up and I did 2 today!! *clapping* thank you! Thank you! I’m so proud I accomplished that. Hard work and determination did pay off! I still feel fat though. I kind of don’t want to go tomorrow and rest but depends whether Rui comes over Saturday and we gym. Atleast I’ll have some body part to do if he does pop up. Shit now I want Jessie to come instead and then I don’t have to gym lol. My lower back seems a bit strained so maybe I shouldn’t push myself harder than I need to. This weekends gonna be busy because 1. I have the aikido pie night social tomorrow and 2. Slug horns pot luck party is on Friday and I haven’t decided if I’m going or not yet. I only know Reva whose going but maybe I should put myself out there instead of thinking about Rui and hating myself for it. Aikido is till 8:30pm that day and the party is at 9:00pm. How do I go to both? Can I go a bit late to the party? It’s ending at 2 I think ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I’ll decide tomorrow after scoping out the address of the party and what I’m gonna make and how to get there! It’s Thursday tomorrow so a whole day of class. Yay… D: The JSA is having its movie night at 7pm and they’re watching your name. Fuck. I wanted to see it again ah! Should I skip psych in near the end just so I can go say hi? (To Rui… *slaps own face*) to Jim and the rest of the people… Then I can go for the aikido social and beg for pie. Sigh I’ll have to make several decisions tomorrow. I hope I make the right ones for me.

I’ll let life be my guide and take me where I’m meant to go. Who knows, maybe good things could happen along the way?

M