#I'm a massive deal

[von-eldritch]

//YEAH

[von-eldritch]

@hashtagbiitch said: ⏳

She has so many secrets

"Let's talk about highschool, since people seem so convinced it was the best fucking time of my life." It really, really wasn't.

"Well, I got into varsity cheer as a freshman. And then the cheer captain broke her legs and everyone else was a fucking slacker so obviously they picked me to sub, and it stuck even once she got better. Which people think meant I broke her legs but I wasn't that ruthless... yet. Anyways, people act like it's so predictable I was cheer captain but I was fourteen and cheer captain, my tits hadn't even finished growing yet. Like, that's actually fucking impressive. Not my fault Hell's filled with losers who don't know anything about sports. I can do a standing goddamn backflip and literally no one talks about it."

[von-eldritch]

Regarding Hellsa and Charlie

//Long overdue that I write what’s canon about them to this blog. That being said, a lot of these are Hellsa’s feelings about it, and her feelings in no way have to be mutual or 100% accurate to reality.

I'm also down for different timelines and canons with discussion, but this is the default.

THE GIST: Hellsa and Charlie were friends when they were younger, but got in an explosive fight when Charlie started dating Seviathan that has festered and grown into the deep, bitter enemy-ship it is today

Charlie was Hellsa’s first and best friend. She’s the person Hellsa was closest to and the only one she was vulnerable with (Charlie doesn’t need to be aware of this or have felt entirely the same. It can 100% be real that it mattered more to Hellsa than it did to Charlie)

Hellsa had protected Charlie from bullies for the entirety of their friendship (As above, Charlie doesn’t need to be aware of this. Especially seeing as a lot of it was social, she really only got into fights about it when they were young). When angry, Hellsa tends to convince herself this is the real reason Charlie kept her around.

Hellsa started to gain popularity and hang out with other people when they were about 13, but it was an especially big shift when they entered highschool. Hellsa herself does not view this as drifting from Charlie (she would've been glad to cancel plans for her) but it can definitely be seen as such

They had fights before Seviathan but that’s the one that ended their relationship

They were worse to each other when the wound was fresh. Got into physical fights and traded insults daily, plus Hellsa doing stuff like writing insults on Charlie’s locker. (This calmed down once they graduated high school, by how much is up to you)

Hellsa was always Hellsa. She was vulnerable with Charlie, but she’s always been bad at vulnerability and it’s entirely possible it was difficult to notice. Additionally, there were times where she was pushy, bossy, or rude towards Charlie (that last one mostly during disagreements), but

Despite that she did put a lot of effort into the friendship. She did care. (This does not mean she did it in a way that was always readily apparent to Charlie, and this is a detail that could easily be forgotten after the Seviathan fight)

Hellsa loved Charlie, but not romantically.

Seviathan was not a fantastic boyfriend. Only in the sense that no high school boy is and he’s canonically a jerk. How far down the jerk-to-genuinely-awful scale is up to you, Hellsa’s just mad that she got thrown away for an asshole.

Hellsa thinks Charlie should know why she was so mad about Seviathan, though whether Charlie knew or not is up to you. (Charlie dating Seviathan hurt her because, at that point, her whole life had been people wanting to get close to her to get close to her family. As the younger child, she isn’t the heir and other nobles had very little political power to gain from her alone. She was often overlooked by everyone (sometimes, in her eyes, including her own family) because of this. Charlie was the only person she felt genuinely wanted her for her, so her dating Seviathan felt like she was just playing Hellsa like everyone else). She feels she had made the insecurity clear to Charlie but that is just how she feels, it doesn’t mean it’s the whole truth. That being said, if Charlie doesn’t know she will just view that as worse because of this.

[von-eldritch]

Character Quirks and Habits BOLD what often or always applies. ITALICIZE what sometimes, occasionally, or somewhat applies. STRIKE what never applies. REPOST & DON’T REBLOG

likes artificial watermelon, sleeps in what they are already wearing, eats their cereal with milk, listens to music with earbuds, hates the summer, can recite passed the first four digits of pi, eats frosting out of the jar, doodles on their notebooks, can bake cookies, has a garden farm, has had a snowball fight, eats pancakes without syrup, prefers shorts over pants, can name more than ten superheroes, has a plan for the zombie apocalypse, uses the same password for everything, can’t hold their breath for more than fifteen seconds, watches anime, hasn’t read harry potter, can say ‘ i love you ‘ in more than one language, prefers mechanical pencils, thinks space is cool, takes personality tests more than once to make sure, can’t tie their shoelaces, has a purse, likes salads, likes cool colors better than warm colors, knows how to braid hair, reads biographies, can ice skate, knows their mbti, reads astrology charts, prefers the star wars prequels to the original trilogy, plays video games, reads the newspaper, likes chocolate ice cream best, doesn’t cuss, memorizes song lyrics, collects coupons, has a preferred order at starbucks, likes movie theater popcorn, has seen a play, listens to music with headphones, owns a hoodie, would rather own cds than online copies, has written a poem, can shuffle cards, subscribes to a magazine, double dips when eating, drinks directly out of the milk container, keeps a journal

Tagged By - @onlyheartaches​ (ily)

Tagging - ignore me if you’ve already done this ‘cause idk but uhhh @pxppinmolly​ @strikers-saloon​ @lutebrute​ @hecatcd​

[von-eldritch]

@demondads said: ♡

Can't win her heart if she doesn't have one

//Get her a weapon. This is actually part of eldritch culture, eldritch courtship does involve the gifting of weapons. Sure, she's left most 'eldritch culture' stuff behind, but Hellsa can't deny part of her still finds it romantic.

[von-eldritch]

@bringsin said: ♡ hey

Can't win her heart if she doesn't have one

//The ultimate way to fluster Hellsa, though it only works with some people, is to just kiss the back of her hand. She is not aware of this. But Hellsa is basically, for all intents and purposes, an eldritch princess and there is some small, buried part of her that responds to being treated as such.

But like I said, it would only work from a few people-- people she wouldn't expect to do it, and who have a fair amount of power. Most people she knows well wouldn't be able to use this effectively.

[von-eldritch]

@hazbinhive said: ♡♡♡ blinks

Can't win her heart if she doesn't have one

//Surprise her! Hellsa is good at reading people, which makes a lot of the people she meets very predictable, and that bores her. If you manage to surprise her, even just once, it lets her know you have some depth that might be worth exploring.

Ask her to dance. Hellsa loves dancing in any and every context and can never get enough of it. Slow or fast, it is exceedingly rare that she would deny someone who asked to dance with her, even if she might otherwise hate them.

Be violent. This doesn't necessarily mean towards her, but it doesn't not mean towards her either. Hellsa's a monster, the lines between bloodlust and actual lust are a little blurred for her. If you can stomach carving into her (and having the same be done to you, she will lose interest otherwise), great. If you can't (and most can't), at least do it to other people.

[von-eldritch]

//also I wanna be clear: hellsa talks about getting girls a lot and I write ships with a lot of women but like by default MOST of the people she dates are men

[von-eldritch]

THINGS YOUR MUSE WILL NOTICE ABOUT MINE

WHAT THEY LOOK LIKE : Tall and curvy, but also unnaturally thin. Think Barbie proportions brought to real life-- conventionally attractive but also a stone's throw away from treading into uncanny valley territory.

Tentacles for hair that can pop off and reform instantly and are therefore mutable when it comes to length and style of hair, they generally don't move but she can control them just as easily as any other part of her.

Usually wears makeup, eyeshadow color varies but her lips are naturally black (she does still wear black lipstick, though). Long, slender fingers, nails are sometimes short and sometimes long (press-ons) but always painted, though the colors vary.

WHAT THEY SMELL LIKE : A variety of perfumes, depending on mood. Usually something fruity, like cherries, citrus, or pomegranate. There's always an underlying scent of salt and (very, very faintly) petrichor.

WHAT THEY TASTE LIKE : Her blood is tart, once again with just a little saltiness to it. Eldritch meat tastes like nothing, you'd taste more if your mouth was empty.

WHAT THEY SOUND LIKE : Generally lilting voice, occasionally on the lower side in terms of pitch but still very feminine. In my head I picture Elizabeth Gillies.

WHAT THEY FEEL LIKE : Generally cool to the touch. Skin is soft and smooth, the skin of the tendrils of her hair even more so (think manta rays at touch pools). The underside of her tendrils does have a bit of suction to them but it's not particularly strong.

tagged by : stolen (hi @heedingcalls) tagging : steal it and tag me for the love of god

[von-eldritch]

@onlyheartaches​ said: Pro and Con!

Please don’t date her, it’s not worth it

//Pro: Can charm the Hell out of you, and will. She can come up with a thousand compliments easy as breathing, and all original.

Con: Her love language is being annoying, which she is also very, very good at

[von-eldritch]

//n e ways have some insight into eldritch kids bc I thought I was done but I was wrong

so the fun thing about eldritch monstrosities is that it’s kinda impossible to divide the void up into smaller parts, meaning that, should hellsa have a kid with anything else but, in this case, let’s say a demon, it wouldn’t be 50% eldritch, 50% demon. It’s be 100% eldritch, 50% demon. Which is impossible but like--

Basically the actual, present body would be a mix of her and them, and it could potentially inherit abilities from the other parent, and the instinct and needs would be too, which means a lot of the bloodlust and insatiable hunger and yadda yadda monster problems Hellsa has to deal with would be lessened GREATLY, but the inherent eldritch powers? Not so much. There are some things it would affect, like Hellsa’s sort of fear-based abilities and all, but at the end of the day it’d still have her, like, weird second body-ness and access to the void as a physical part of themself and so on and so forth.

The only time this wouldn’t be the case is for a full human bc they would actually be incompatible in making a kid the traditional way and instead it would require much fuckery which tends to muddle things

[von-eldritch]

@fizzarolli​ said: 😏

Avoiding the obvious answers, that is

“Machiavellian power grabs, social or otherwise.”

“Look, nothing is hotter than power. And I’m not talking other people, who fucking gives a shit about that. Having power, gaining it, that’s what’s hot. Watching dumb bitches find their downfall with just a few self-satisfied sentences from me? You know what a rush that is, to know that you can make or break someone with just a few words? The direct influence I have? The feel of my empire expanding? It just makes me want to grab someone and rail them.”

[von-eldritch]

@strikers-saloon​ said: 💚💚💖

Let’s be honest there are NO reasons to date Hellsa

//In order:

💚 She has the full expectation that every relationship of hers will end. She has lived a long life but even counting that the amount of people she’s dated in that time is absurd. I literally cannot give a metaphor for how often she changes partners because there’s nothing in the world made so wastefully that it’s thrown away as often as Hellsa throws away significant others. Even her longstanding relationships have an expiration date and it is VERY difficult, near impossible, to convince her otherwise. And, therefore, she treats every relationship like this is the case. No such thing as in it for the long haul.

💚 She likes playing games. Mind games and manipulation, causing drama for the sake of it, everything. Even if she doesn’t cheat on you, she will flirt with other people to make you jealous, she will be loving and sweet one day and harsh and cold the next, she will start fights just because she can. You will never know where you stand with her because she will never let you know. Hellsa is nearly guaranteed to give you permanent trust issues because she lies easy as breathing and just as often.

BUT, a reason to date her

💖 Absolute best sex of your life

[von-eldritch]

@raichoose​​ said: 21. What common etiquette do they disagree with? Do they still follow it?

You want to ask me about Hellsa you want to ask me about Hellsa SO BAD

//People referring to her as Miss von Eldritch. I’ve mentioned it before, but her name means a lot to her and she’d rather not be reduced to just her family’s name when she’s worked so hard to be her own person outside of them. So no matter who it is that’s referring to her, she refuses to let them call her anything along those lines. As in, if they consistently do it she will eventually drop correcting them and just not respond to it.

As an added point, she generally doesn’t do it for other people either. Even the ones she should address like that out of politeness (mostly Tavi’s parents), she uses Miss Stella or Mister Stolas instead of Goetia.

[von-eldritch]

IC STATS TAG .

BOLD. All that apply. ITALIC. Leaning or former

WEALTH . $ Financial : wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty $ Medical : fit / moderate / sickly / disabled  / disadvantaged / non applicable $ Class or Caste : upper / middle / working / street trash / slave / unsure $ Education : qualified / unqualified / studying / other $ Criminal Record : yes, for major crimes / yes, for minor crimes / no / has committed crimes, but has not been caught yet

FAMILY . ☀︎ Children : has a child or children (AU) / has no children / wants children / verse dependent ☀︎ Relationship with Family : close with sibling(s) / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased / (it’s complicated) ☀︎ Affiliation : orphaned / adopted / disowned / raised by birth parent / not applicable

TRAITS / TENDENCIES . ▲ extroverted / introverted / in between ▲ disorganized / organized / in between ▲ close-minded / open-minded / in between ▲ calm / anxious / in between ▲ disagreeable / agreeable / in between ▲ cautious / reckless / in between ▲ patient / impatient / in between ▲ outspoken / reserved / in between ▲ leader / follower / in between ▲ empathetic / unempathetic / in between ▲ optimistic / pessimistic / in between ▲ traditional / modern / in between ▲ hard-working / lazy / in between ▲ cultured / uncultured / in between ▲ loyal / disloyal / in between ▲ faithful / unfaithful / in between

BELEIFS . ★ Faith : monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic / it’s complicated ★ Belief in Ghosts or Spirits : yes / no / don’t know / don’t care ★ Belief in an Afterlife : yes / no / don’t know / don’t care ★ Belief in Reincarnation : yes / no / don’t know / don’t care ★ Religious : orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious ★ Philosophical : yes / no

SEXUALITY & ROMANTIC INCLINATION . ❥ Sexuality : heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual / demisexual / omnisexual ❥ Sex : sex repulsed / sex neutral/ sex favorable / naive and clueless ❥ Romance: romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable / naive and clueless ❥ Sexually : adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious / inhibited ❥ Potential Sexual Partners : male / female / agender / other / none / all ❥ Potential Romantic Partners : male / female / agender / other / none / all

ABILITIES . ≡ Combat Skills : excellent / good / moderate / poor / none   ≡ Literacy Skills : excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ≡ Artistic Skills : excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ≡ Technical Skills : excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

HABITS . ♠︎ Drinking Alcohol : never / sometimes / frequently / to excess ♠︎ Smoking : trying to quit / never / sometimes / frequently (pot only) / to excess ♠︎ Other Narcotics : never / sometimes / frequently / to excess ♠︎ Medicinal Drugs : never / sometimes / frequently / to excess ♠︎ Indulgent Food : never / sometimes / frequently / to excess ♠︎ Splurge Spending : never / sometimes / frequently / to excess ♠︎ Gambling : never / sometimes / frequently / to excess

Tagged by: @strikers-saloon​ ty ty ty ily

Tagging: I never know who to tag for these! Please steal!!

[von-eldritch]

@hellsmayflower​ said: 🎯

I have so many useless facts

//I’ve mentioned before that Hellsa makes a little monster noise when she’s relaxed and happy. Usually I call it a growl but honestly I envision it more as that, like, ch-ch-ch-ch-ch noise Eda makes when she goes all owl beast

If y’all know it, you know it