#I'm determined to get a good grade in Being a Grad Student

[juniperscholar]

I think I spent about 8-10 hours on my syntax homework over the past two days, and that's NOT including the time I spent reading 6 chapters of a textbook to try to understand LFG

And honestly, I'm not even mad. It's so interesting. Also I am the most stubborn person in the world, and I have decided that I simply will be good at syntax. If I have to go a little bit insane in the process, so be it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[ra0n]

KI RAON / intro (under the cut) / application / visage / profile

helllooo it's kira here and i'm v excited to bring you miss "princess u" ki raon !! you've probably seen her a) skateboarding around campus, b) constantly trying to find some new plight to throw herself into so she can write a song about it or more recently c) stuck in a gossip-girl-reported catfight between her and her sister (s'nu subplot). i'm super excited to get to know everyone so please like this for me to message u or feel free to message first <3

warning: super sorry for how long and messy this is i was horribly unprepared

basics: 24, (grad) music production and sound engineering student at snu and the princess/princess u skeleton of s'nu

backstory it's just been her and her mom for as long as she remembers in their over-familiar, little town. grew up being taught to stay humble and always shrink herself into the background so nobody would take notice of her

but raon's always had a fiery spirit (exhibit one: constantly got scolded for shoving the same tacky boy over in the playground when they were five) (exhibit two: fought with a classmate over the last doraemon toy and came home with scratches. she won the fight btw) (exhibit three: picked up a guitar in eighth grade and never looked back, much to her mother's chagrin)

she always believed that she was destined for greater things despite the financial limits on her and discovering music felt like the final puzzle piece being slotted into place. "borrowed" instruments from her highschool's run down music room, not that anybody noticed, and taught herself between studying and her part time job at the local convenience store

developed a knack for song-writing and more specifically, music production using youtube videos and free programs though she saved up to buy some proper ones later on, essentially trying to translate her life of poverty into songs. many of them revolve around the hardships of her life and distant relationship with her mother

starving artist trope to the maximum

but yeah eventually graduated high school and told her mom she got into snu for business and management when in reality, it was for music production

ensue very messy argument when she found out which ended in raon running away with what she had saved up from her job to seoul. didn't talk to her again after that until raon found out she passed away

and then gets hit with news that the one of friends she's surrounded herself with is her actual step sister, and then realises with the help of gossip girl that they both like prince charming

no rest for the wicked!!! half loves half hates the attention on her - love because she likes to pretend to the world she has a strong front and nothing can sway her, hates because she actually does not have that strong of a front

just trying to get through university and graduate with a decent job at a music studio or big shot entertainment company, but if she can make some mess whilst she's here she might as well

character wise she's very entitled, genuinely believes she has a gift that nobody else does and that because she's gone through a life of poverty and struggles, she "deserves" good things to happen to her more than anyone else

which is why she's very determined to make sure prince charming is hers at the end - why should her sister whose lived a life of luxury get the first pick in a relationship, too?

takes a lot of pride in her music and works very hard, essentially a perfectionist when it comes to the stuff she produces so constructive criticism is accepted though not easily, especially if you're someone who isn't in the music field

has a bad habit of mistaking being blunt for being honest, not one to be soft-spoken but does talk quite a lot. initiates conversations most of the time ("hey wasn't that lecture so fucking boring") even if she's never met you before

super flighty as a person though it's unintentional. here one second, gone the next. always looking for inspiration, for something exciting, for someone interesting

works part-time as a night bartender at a club near snu because of the perks (aka free drinks plus sometimes, they let her mix the tracks on the dj deck)

also in an indie rock band that plays around bars and shows!! she's the guitarist and sub vocalist - not sure if they're trying to do something serious or just a ragtag group bound together by love for music but

sorry i'm not organised enough to have a plots page set up but throwing some ideas out there id love anyone from the s'nu subplot!! also band members (she loves you guys); regulars at the bar she works at; regulars at her band's gigs; fellow creatives; fellow skateboarders; ex-best friends; fwbs; fwbs getting increasingly messy; exes; someone she sees as her "muse"; someone who's been a fan of her music since her (unironic) soundcloud days; companies trying to recruit her for producing; someone who knew her pre-seoul; ride or die; found brother/sister (since she's waging war on her actual one); someone she keeps skating into accidentally and fuck she's so sorry for making you spill coffee over yo-

[cancerbiophd]

Hi, first I just wanted to thank you for the time that you put into answering your asks (i've send a few myself) and it's always so helpfull. And second, I was diagnosted with fibromyalgia, and although my illness isnt impairing (yet) I'm afraid that when I apply for a masters, I won't be selected even with my good grades(80%) and shadowing experiences, or that people will think that I'm lying about my illness cause I can be competitve. Should inform the uni or just keep it to myself?

Hi there! Thank you for that kind and thoughtful message! I’m really glad to have been able to help you!

I’m so sorry to hear about your diagnosis, but I am so SO proud of you for still striving for your goals. I know you’re going to do many great things. 

As for mentioning your fibromyalgia in everything related to grad school (from apps to interviews to day-to-day grad life), you have the choice and the right to not talk about it if you don’t want to. Our health is part of our privacy, and sometimes that ain’t anyone else’s beeswax. 

If you do choose to mention it, know that schools can not legally (at least in the US) discriminate you based on your health. 

One reason why you may choose to talk about fibromyalgia may be to explain anything in your academic record or CV that the symptoms may have negatively affected, like grades or time away from school. Note that you don’t necessarily need to specifically say you have fibromyalgia; the term “chronic illness” is ok to use instead. And if you do go this route, you (and even a letter of rec writer) can follow that up with how you overcame or are learning how to overcome those obstacles. I think grad school admission committees would be understanding and impressed by your tenacity and personal growth. 

Related, you can go straight for the gusto and use the experience you have with living with fibromyalgia to illustrate how you overcame or are overcoming a challenge, which is a trait that grad app committees like to see in their recruits. I think the fact that you do have a strong academic record and well-rounded experiences can back up your points: “Look at how hard working I am despite my chronic illness! You want someone with this kind of grit and determination!” 

So basically: you don’t need to mention your fibromyalgia if you don’t want to, but if you do, you can focus on the positives. 

Going a little off topic, but I hope the programs you’re applying to will let you interview with potential PIs/mentors before you decide on one. That way, you can ask them what their policies are on students taking time off for health reasons. If they seem kind and understanding about it, then that’ll be a good mentor to have. If they’re absolute workaholics who treat their grad students like robots and not human beings, then they may not be the best (for anyone, really, chronic illness or no). 

Here’s a really great reddit thread on grad students talking about managing chronic illness in grad school including this fantastic response by a user who’s a professor in psychology (or at least their description says so). They kinda reiterate what I’ve talked about (but in a more eloquent way), and it’s nice to hear it from a professor:

Congrats on accumulating such an impressive record - you should definitely be a competitive applicant. I think it's quite possible to be successful in graduate school despite your illnesses. However, when you are considering programs, you will need to play close attention to the department culture and your prospective advisor's personality. You will need someone who is willing to be flexible with you, so talk with current students and probe about whether or not each prospective advisor is supportive, reasonable, and stable when you do your campus visits. I would not disclose your conditions in your application materials or during your interviews; hold this information back until you receive an offer, and then have a candid discussion with students and your prospective advisor. At that point, be clear with your advisor how you manage your condition and how your medical treatment regimen might sometimes impact your ability to work, and carefully observe how s/he reacts. It's a huge red flag if anyone gets bent out of shape about this.

You should also look into student medical insurance when you apply. Schools vary in the quality of the coverage available to grad students, and programs vary in the proportion of the cost that falls to the student to cover.

Overall, remember that your health comes first. Moving toward degree completion at a slower pace is a totally viable option if it helps you manage your condition, so ease back into school and don't overcommit to projects right away!

They advise not to talk about one’s chronic illness in applications and interviews, but that choice is still up to you and your comfort level. 

I hope this helps! Best of luck on your apps and the whole process, and know that no matter what happens, I’m so freakin proud of you and you inspire me!

(If anyone has anything else to add, please do!!)

[therapy101]

I'm in high school, but I'm really into clinical psychology. I find it fascinating and I'd love to go into that field some way. But I'm also not a straight A, student although I try to be. I was wondering if to get a Psy.D you have to be extremely smart? Will my social life be killed? I am extremely determined and I would do anything to get that degree, but I feel like I'll fall into debt. Any advice/ answers? The internet is all over the place so I figured asking a professional would be best.

hi anon,

Getting into grad school does require academic excellence. That doesn’t mean you have to be a straight A student (I was not), but it does mean that your grades need to indicate that you can be successful in an academic environment. High school grades don’t count towards this- it’s all about your college GPA and courses. 

It is difficult to balance a social life with grad school. My social life in grad school was okay, but definitely different and less frequent than before I went to grad school. You’ll just have less time and energy to devote to non-grad school things, so you have to be more selective about what you’re involved in. For me, I focused on having some amount of social time, regular exercise, my dog, and some TV/reading (more TV, because my attention span was really impacted by grad school). This is pretty common among the people I know- that you have to pick and choose, and just have fewer things going on in your life outside of grad school. 

Money is also an issue. That’s why I’d encourage you to seek a PhD program, because there aren’t any PsyD programs I am aware of that offer complete tuition remission, health insurance, and a stipend (I think Rutgers offers some stipends?). PhD programs offer better funding and there are a larger number of good PhD programs. Still, being a grad student means not making much money and possibly incurring some debt (average debt of grad students applying for internship is about 50k, the last time I checked- that’s 18 months or so out from graduation). You can take precautions against this- only go to programs that guarantee funding all 4-5 years, go to programs in low cost of living cities, have a roommate, etc. I will say that I was extremely frugal in grad school and still have significant debt. 

Grad school is a sacrifice, which is why I advise people to not pursue grad school unless they are certain about it. If you’re passionate about it and going through grad school will get you to a career you want (which it sounds like you are), then it might be worth it. It was worth it to me, despite the money issues and the social life issues, etc etc.  But it’s okay to decide against it because the sacrifice is not worth it to you. 

side note- I’m not sure why you’re focused on a PsyD rather than a PhD- quality PsyD programs are equivalent to quality PhD programs, and there are far more quality PhD programs. Consider both, and find a quality program that meets your specific needs.