do all of the lovesick asks bitch. expose urself
wow, ok.
read more thing bc this is long and embarrassing
1: Do you have a current crush?
Two actually but who's counting
2: How long has your crush lasted?
Uhh a few months n then the other one is weird i can't answer that lmao
3: 5 songs that you have associated with your crush?
I'm……..not that sappy I can give u like one
Ice prince : Runaways by ATL
Space boy : Stars by Fun.
4: Do you think they've ever liked you back?
I mean. It's very likely.
5: Will you ever reveal your feelings to them?
Yea probably
6: What’s holding you back from making a move?
It's not that I haven't made a move but like. I am Fear.
7: Are you frightened by your feelings for them?
A lil
8: Do you think they could ever love you?
Maybe???? but i’m kind of an optimist
9: Do you love them?
Lol next question
10: Have you ever had a crush on someone you really shouldn't?
DEFINITELY. I CAN'T NAME ANYONE SPECIFICALLY BUT THE ANSWER IS PROBABLY YES.
11: Do you think anyone currently has a crush on you
...IT'S VERY LIKELY.
12: Ever had a crush on what you thought was a platonic friend?
Hi Jared
13: What would you do if your crush revealed they felt the same?
I'd probably need a second to process it but like probably hug ‘em idfk
14: Has your crush ever hurt you?
Nope!!!!
15: Have they made you cry by breaking your heart?
Nope!!!!!!!!!
16: Why do you like them?
Ice prince is fun to tease idk we go back n forth a lot but he's also a softie n listen he's dramatic enough to keep up w/ me
Space boy tells u like it is and he seems kinda scary or not,, nice at first maybe but he's actually also soft !!
They're also both hot as hell oh my god
17: Do you think you'll ever get over them?
I mean. If I had to I would but... I don't WANT TO.
18: Do you have 1 specific song that is strongly associated with a certain memory or interaction with them?
Mmm not really?? Not yet?? It'll happen dw
19: The moment you knew you had feelings for them?
We both got scared of the firework finale on the 4th and I squeaked and he like held onto me n it was really funny n cute n I was just like “ok this is a thing now great”
Uhh I was doing the typical girl thing where I send screenshots of a conversation to a friend only the friend is his sister so………..i blame her it’s literally all her fault
20: What would they have to do for you to stop liking them?
Murder someone probably
Or y'know
Something equally as shitty n illegal
21: Have you ever fallen asleep with them?
Yea. Both. Napping is cool.
22: Held their hand?
Mmhm! Both but like that's not that weird
23: Kissed their cheek?
Yup. Both.
24: Kissed them on the lips?
Yeah. Both. Actually.
25: Gone down on them/ they've gone down on you?
N O P E
26: Had sex with them?
Nuh-uh.
27: Where on your body have they touched you?
This is…. A weird question I don't like it
28: Does their touch set your skin on fire?
Fire.
Ice prince.
Fire.
HM.
29: Do you get butterflies when they touch you?
Ok maybe
30: Do they make you smile like no one else can?
Y e a
31: Does their presence calm you?
Mmhmm.
32: Does it make you go crazy being around them and not 'being with' them?
Not… until recently but---
33: Are you friends with your crush?
Both of ‘em!
34: Have you always been friends?
Uhh I guess w/ Ice prince yes but not the other one
35: Last thing they messaged you about?
One was abt a dog, other one was abt coming over to hang out
36: Best phone call with them?
Hands down any call when I've been driving so I make my brother talk to them instead those are always fun
37: Last time you hung out with them?
I. I literally started answering this in one of their houses.
38: Ever been drunk together?
I DON'T DRINK
39: Fondest memory of them?
The fireworks show n then probs a few days ago when we just drove around n talked abt stuff
40: Ever made a mistake with them?
Mistake??????????? i don’t make those
41: Regretted not making a move?
Every day of my life but also I have literally kissed both of them so which is the truth
42: If you could go back in time to that moment, what would you do?
Nothing ‘cause I'm a big baby
43: Do you think that would change your current relationship with them?
Nope
44: If you could get a 100% honest answer from them, what 3 questions would you ask?
ok first FUCK THIS QUESTION
Ice prince
Do u. Actually wanna date or am I just the most gullible person ever
.......................so how do you feel about polyamory
Do u actually hate the puns or do u secretly enjoy them I need to know.
Space boy
Are you aware that you can literally text me for anything at any time?? Bc u should be
Were you ever afraid to talk to me?
Will you promise to talk to me before doing stupid shit so that at the very least i can tell u that ur an idiot,,, but like. affectionately.
45: Did they wish you Happy Birthday on your birthday?
My birthday is in like another month and I didn't know either of them really last year so they better
46: Have they ever tried to make a move?
?????????
Idk tbh
47: If so why did you miss it?
‘Cause I'm clueless as hell
48: Have they ever been infatuated with a friend of yours?
Don't think so
49: Are they single?
Lol yeah they're definitely single
50: Where were you when you felt the most for them?
IT'S ALWAYS WHEN THEY'RE SLEEPING they both just look so cute n peaceful n I get all mushy n wanna protect them but I'm weak as hell so
51: Any specific place you associate with them?
Mmmm not really
52: Films that make you think about them?
Disney films in general
Marvel movies for Ice prince bc NERD
53: Have you picked up a habit because of them?
I don't think so but it's also not unlikely
54: What was your first impression of them?
Ice prince seemed antisocial and idk abt space boy we were like 5 yrs old technically so who knows man
55: Has it altered since then?
LMAO YES
56: Do you remember the first thing you talked about?
Probably musicals bc I can't shut up ever and he was confused
And uhhh no unless u mean like when we started hanging out bc it was candy
57: First time they touched you?
COLD
HE DID IT TO SPITE ME AND IT WAS FUNNY BUT IT WAS SO COLD HOW
And I'm 99% certain I made him high five me before we ever spoke bc I'm a nuisance
58: Have they ever lied to you?
Not that I know of
59: What are their eyes like?
Ohhhhh my GOD
really......clear?? that’s not like. a good way to describe em but u know when u look up at the sky and it’s like. wow there are no clouds!! n then u feel the breeze and it’s kinda cold but it’s not unpleasant it’s?? p nice??? like. that.
cool as FRICK like what the hell i’m actually jealous they’re a rly pretty nice shade n then suddenly it’s!!! different!!!! and it’s like!!!!!!!!!!!!! a surprise a v good surprise which is fitting u just gotta look a lil and he’s full of lil surprises
60: What are you most attracted to about them?
well,, for one they’re both hot as hell, so. that. in general.
if u know anything abt me i’m a sucker for pretty eyes
i also like the “soft but pretends to not be” because i think it’s cute they’re also really good to cuddle with
61: Can you see a future with them?
well i can’t see one without ‘em so something’s gotta give here right?
62: Have you sabotaged things between you two?
i freaking hope not
63: Why? What were you afraid of achieving? Love? Happiness? Content? Disappointment?
why does this thing assume you said yes to the above question that’s kinda rude
64: Could they make you happy?
already do
65: Do you dream about them?
if we’re friends and you haven’t appeared in one of my dreams and done smth weird or random are we actually friends??
side note does daydreaming count LOL
66: What's something that only you two do?
i don’t think i “gently bully” anyone nearly as much as i do ice prince also the only one who actually can cuddle w/ me properly in the summer i’m js
uuuummmm go on random drives in the middle of the night so tht zoe can make out w/ ppl instead of texting our sorry asses
67: Does liking them make you feel vulnerable?
you. have. no idea.
68: Have they ever given you anything?
food has definitely been exchanged and shared. i’ve stolen sweaters. uh.
69: Have they ever used you?
.........not that i’m aware of??
70: Have they abused and manipulated you due to your feelings for them?
nO WHAT TH E
71: Have you ever spent quite literally all day and night thinking about them?
that’s......a bit much i might be pathetic and somewhat desperate but like i do kinda have a life
72: Have you ever accidentally nearly walked into moving traffic cause you were thinking about them?
no but i’ve walked into walls because i was tired and thinking abt stuff so that’s a thing i probably have done
73: Ever worn anything knowing it would draw their attention to you?
YEAH LMAO I DO THAT ALL THE TIME IN GENERAL i like attention fight me
74: Have they ever made you feel so safe and content everything else slips away?
y e ah
75: Ever held you so close you could feel their heartbeat?
mmhmm
76: Truthfully do you think you belong together right now?
[taylor swift’s you belong with me playing in the distance]
77: Have they ever seen you completely vulnerable?
um. no.
78: Do you trust them?
i would trust all of my friends with my life
79: When you see them what feelings are strongest?
i just get?? really happy n i turn into a little kid i swear to god how does he put up with me
n he makes me feel really calm n content n just. good. u know.
80: Are they in love or interested in someone else?
d e a r l o r d i h o p e n o t
81: If they asked you to kiss them, would you?
in a heartbeat
82: Will they be in your life a year from now?
they BETTER BE
83: A moment where you so nearly gave into your feelings for them and did something about it?
i have literally kissed both of them and not because of dares what kind of,,
84: Do they know you have feelings for them?
i’m not exactly,,, subtle
85: Do you have a favourite picture with them?
no but i have favorite pictures of them
86: Your ideal date with them?
hey. concept. a double date. but like. instead of 2 couples it’s just me w/ both of them wow
87: What's their name?
it’s rly obvious that i’m talking about porter and connor fuck you
88: Have you ever been in their room?
i’ve been in connor’s but porter n i mostly chill other places
89: Shared a secret with them?
yeah but it’s not a secret if i tell the internet now is it?
90: Have they ever made you a promise and broken it?
don’t think so
91: Have they ever disappointed you?
nope!
92: Whats the most problematic thing about them, which you overlook due to your feelings for them?
uh. idk. porter’s kinda closed off to other people at first i guess that could be problematic. i’m patient w/ that shit so it doesn’t bug me as much idk
general relationships or lack thereof w/ other ppl tbh for both of them i think
93: Have you ever had to compete for their affection?
no
94: For as long as they're in your life could you handle just being friends?
that’s what i do with p much everyone else but another way to approach this is if u couldn’t be together would u shut them out and the answer is no?? bc that’s kinda shitty
so yes
95: Ever looked for a sign to make a move?
every?? single second of every day but once again i have literally kissed both of them uh
96: What's standing in your way from being with them?
general anxiety
a single conversation
...lmao
97: Would you let them use you for sex?
this implies that,, they don’t care abt me and only themselves n they’re not really?? like that so?? it wouldn’t happen like that??
realistically knowing myself i wanna say no but i probably would which is Not Good i know
98: Ever had a bad feeling about them that's screaming for you to get out while you still can?
no. like. literally the opposite. wtf
99: If you could go back in time, would you avoid ever meeting them?
NEVER
100: You have 1 wish about them, what would you wish for?
that porter finds someone who makes him feel warm n fuzzy on the inside even if it’s not me
n for connor that one day everything is stable and everything is ok
anyway hey jared U SUCK
1 note
·
View note
Hi, I'm an 18 year old ex-Christian, and I was raised within a variety of a cultish communities in the evangelical south. AMA. via /r/atheism
Submitted August 26, 2019 at 07:26PM by DJSpook
(Via reddit https://ift.tt/2U2zfg6)
Hi, I'm an 18 year old ex-Christian, and I was raised within a variety of a cultish communities in the evangelical south. AMA.
I think it's safe to say I've more-or-less seen it all. My parents attempted to perform exorcisms on me and my older brother, who they refused enrollment into an Ivy League school into which he was enthusiastically admitted for fear of the "liberal indoctrination" he would have experienced there.
I spent almost a decade attending a megachurch with a multi-millionaire pastor with multiple luxury houses who masterfully manipulated my barely-literate father into donating several hundred thousand dollars worth of free construction services and charitable monetary infusions to said church.
I was enrolled against my consent into an infamous, headline-making, supreme-court-appearing Christian high-school, which has privately held mass student body meetings for speeches that compared homosexuals to "ticking time bombs" and "the splattering guts of roadkill possums," and which dramatically denied entry to a gay couple at a school dance (One of whom became the subject of CNN coverage interest, and was subsequently approached by several syndicated journalists. However, her parents coerced her into silence and committed her into a "remedial therapy center" for several weeks, known also as a gay conversion camp).
I was sent to a two-week Christian apologetics camp known as "Summit Ministries" in Dayton Tennessee (progenitor of the infamous Scopes Monkey Trial), where public speakers and evangelical attorneys regaled us with tales of that holy ground and preached evolution-denial ad nauseam for hours a day. There, I met Frank Turek, who, while conversing with him about his famous debate with Christopher Hitchens, privately confided in me that he secretly had no idea what his opponent was saying and for minutes at a time "experienced my mind going blank" against a torrent of literary references and scholarly pronouncements. At the time I was still a Christian and thought to myself, "Oh, thank *God* Frank has kept this to himself, it's really fortunate for him no one's recording this, because this might be the single most insecure, self-incriminating rant I've ever had the displeasure of enduring."
In the course of this camp I was socially coerced into participating in what might be the single most fucking insane, borderline scandalous thing I have ever experienced, a cultist ritual in which all the male camp attendees were shepherded into an open field late at night (the overwhelming majority of us being legal minors), bound together by rope, and approached in a strange pattern by the camp supervisors with knives while they muttered ancient latin ("Imago Dei") and ceremoniously cut each of our ropes while we bowed our heads in prayer.
During a mandatory class on Christian theology and apologetics required during my senior year of high school, I publicly apostatized from the Christian faith, calling into question the moral defensibility of the doctrine of Hell, and immediately hurtled to lows of social isolation and stigma that caused me a clinically significant anxiety disorder. After that point, teachers began to approach me in private and ask me to stay after class or in their offices to address me in insultingly solemn tones, speaking to me as if I had just received a terminal diagnosis of brain cancer.
My father caught me with a copy of The God Delusion and, I swear it to God the God I don't believe in, actually threatened to perform a Nazi-style book burning in our house over it. I managed to convince him that I was only researching "the other side" to improve my "evangelistic prowess," but he's since become increasingly skeptical. After my brother professed his atheism, my parents proceeded to viciously emotionally abuse him as tears came in sheets down their faces, and since then they have aggressively attempted to coax him back into the fold at every available opportunity, performed exorcisms on him and myself, attempted to monitor and regulate all communications he has had with me and my younger brother (who they have taken great pains to poison against him), and in the succeeding weeks my mother threatened to commit me into a psychiatric hospital on several occasions for not wanting to go to a Christian youth ministry for social outings.
I am honestly at the point where I don't know what to do. I feel incredibly alone and voiceless and I just want someone to hear my story. I have considered making YouTube videos about it but I realize how hard it is to get exposure there now with all the vying commentators. For what it's worth, Tara Westover's memoir Educated made me finally summon the will to write this, and if anyone ever reads this I hope they'll know how much her story changed my life and showed me that it's possible to be saved from all of this.
Edit:
After writing this my brother reminded me to include this chilling anecdote: at a prayer meeting with a few of the more prominent men in our church, one of the deacons explained to grunts of approval and several solemn "amen"'s that he was currently struggling to convince his daughter to give up her aspirations to go to college because "I firmly believe it is not a woman's place to be the most educated person in the house!" According to him there was some enthusiastic nodding and a few of the men even gave a hearty laugh at that comment. Worse still, as far as we can tell that man got his way, and quite successfully quashed his daughter's satanic ambitions to have a brain of her own.
0 notes