#I'm so sad that I can't go off on a separate tangent about Harry and Albus' Deep Platonic Regard For Each Other

[firendgold]

Yes to this! This is one thing that's really taken my attention. It's crazy just how much Harry pays attention to Albus in the books. Description wise I mean. None of his other teachers quite get the same treatment, if you know what I mean. Albus is also the only one - to my knowledge - that Harry tends to refer to with his first name when he thinks of him. Again, especially in conjunction with his other teachers. Like, there's a moment in GoF, where Albus bursts in on him and BCJ, alongside McGonagall and Snape, and Albus is the one who gets a first name mention.

Also, I mean, this description!!!

Another thing I can't help but note, is Harry's almost jealousy regarding how much Albus shared with Grindelwald compared to himself. It's obvious just how much Harry is hurting throughout DH. He's grieving in a way I don't think he ever has - Sirius being a close second.

And on top of that, Harry also has to deal with information coming out about Dumbledore which makes him question everything. But what really unsettled him, when it came to it, wasn't Albus' misty past, but rather Albus' feelings for Harry.

He was scared that Dumbledore had never cared for him. He was scared that the reasons Albus had kept secrets from him - about himself - was because Albus didn't trust or care for him. He needed to know if Dumbledore had ever actually loved him. And that always breaks my heart. Because to the reader - and even Hermione - it was so clear that Albus did love him.

And I do think like you, that had Harry time travelled, or vice versa, these two would have been perfect for each other.

I absolutely get you and agree re: Harry and noticing his professors' physical features. Most of them get an introductory description at best, with exceptions going to Snape (for obvious reasons) and Lupin (because he just looks so underfed and just... not-taken-care-of, which probably is extremely noticeable to someone with Harry's upbringing... though that's a whole other tangent). Meanwhile, Albus' hair, eyes, glasses, and posture are remarked upon frequently. Like, frequently frequently.

When I was writing that bullet, in fact, I was thinking of another moment in GoF towards the beginning, when Harry's just arrived at Hogwarts and he's scanning the staff table. Snape gets an entire unflattering paragraph, and then Harry gives us this gem:

Harry, my dear. My beloved. Why. Why are you paying Albus this much attention. Why are you mirroring him.

It's also interesting that you bring up how often Albus gets Full Name Privilege or First Name Privilege in Harry's head, because I'm frequently arguing about the opposite elsewhere (that Albus never, ever calls Harry "Potter" or "Mr. Potter" or even "my boy" in canon, and anyone who says he does has read too much fanfic). For ship purposes, it becomes even more significant that they frequently refer to each other as if they are on equal footing.

I plan on writing a whole post someday about Harry's jealousy of Grindelwald once I can be relied upon not to turn it into a grindeldore bashing fest lmao. On the one hand, it makes sense that Harry is grieving Albus' presence in his life, since Albus was one of the most steadfast people and gave him a lot of support he desperately needed. There's no other character that wore as many hats for Harry as Albus Dumbledore did, whether he intended to or not.

On the other hand—Deathly Hallows is the book where we learn that there is so much about Albus that we and Harry never knew. We get a huge bucket of information about Grindelwald and his relationship with Albus that we never had before. And while Harry is definitely disillusioned about Albus' dark past, while he is certainly frightened of the possibility that Albus never cared about him after all (which is so STUPID, Harry, how could you not see that Albus loved you???), it is wild that what he chooses to focus on in that talk with Hermione is how much Albus shared with Gellert.

Whether he's aware of it or not, Harry often puts himself (at most a seventeen year-old boy) on the same level as both his headmaster/mentor and his headmaster/mentor's evil ex-boyfriend. I don't know, I just find it notable... and hilarious.