#I'm so using this for my dracula dissertation next year

[t470n]

One thing that's becoming increasingly obvious is the running theme of Old vs New and how Team New is definitely winning. The whole thing about Jonathan and Mina being very young, like early twenties or something, and their youth being clearly reflected in their behaviour and this clashing with how immensely old Dracula is from his withering body to his ancient castle to the implied centuries of history he has lived through and personally participated in.

Dracula holds onto old ideas about useless peasants being nothing more than an endless supply of cannon fodder that he used to use as meat to throw at his enemies and now uses as food for himself (and his roomies) and there is also his thing about wistfully looking back on the history of his great house. He's happy that the house Jonathan found is old because a new one would have been impossible for him to live in. He has a grossly inflated sense of his own entitlement due to his noble status despite the fact that he is considered a dead man from an extinct lineage. He still considers himself as noble and respectable as he would have been hundreds of years ago, hence why he is so concerned about not being respected/revered in England, his predatory feasting on the local peasants as well as his treatment of Jonathan. Jonathan is a working man who is there in service of Dracula and therefore beneath him. Dracula can barge into his room whenever he wants, destroy his property, force him to acclimate to nocturnal life for Dracula's comfort and use him as a means to an end that will eventually die, in a way using him up just like he does with the local peasants. The way I see their relationship is that Dracula is possessive of Jonathan, not protective. To him, Jonathan is an object for his use that he has taken a fancy to, little more than an entertaining puppy or jester who means nothing in the grand scheme of things because he is hardly his own person, he is Dracula's. It's the same "I am noble therefore I matter and if you aren't noble you are here to be used" mindset that would have been acceptable in the ancient past he comes from but not in the modern day.

On the contrary, Jonathan and Mina are aggressively modern to the point where Jonathan explicitly mentions this when he's afraid ("19th century up to date with a vengeance"). They are young, they write in shorthand and (*SPOILERS FOR LATER ON IN THE BOOK*) there is one point in the story where Good Guy Squad needs to do a lot of blood transfusions which, at the time, was the Hot New Science and extremely modern, hence the complete disregard for blood types which weren't really a thing back then. Jonathan mentions that writing in shorthand would have confused the Count and therefore allowed him to send messages or keep writing that Dracula wouldn't have been able to decipher and being able to keep his shorthand diary does help keep Jonathan sane. Mina also mentions in her letter practising shorthand so she can keep diligent notes on the conversations she hears and oh boy I sure do wonder if that's going to be useful when someone needs to take notes on what happens in the rest of the book. The relationships between the heroes are also very, for lack of a better word, modern. Dracula and his roommates have a clear hierarchy that is very traditional but doesn't exist with the heroes. There is no one person in a position of power over everyone else in the group, including in the individual marriages. Neither Mina nor Jonathan have any more power over the other than the other has over them. They are equals, both mutually in love and mutually intelligent and productive. At the same time, it's fairly non-traditional for three suitors of the same woman to become very good friends. In most traditional narratives of gothic fiction you'd probably find a dual for the Lady's hand, a secret love, some kind of tragic heartbreak or something like that but these are "19th century up to date with a vengeance" young men who will not be so silly. Not to mention the fact that the group mostly comes together because of the relationship between two women which is refreshingly modern. The technology, attitudes, and relationships of the heroes are what set them apart from the Count as well as what lets them succeed.

I just love the dichotomy between the withered villain trying to relive the glory of the ancient past while desperately holding onto expired ideals of bygone days vs the modern and up-to-date heroes making full use of modern technology and stereotype-breaking to defeat him. In a way it almost spits in the face of the very common romanticisation of the past that is especially common in gothic fiction where the pretty old castles and cathedrals make people forget about the endless supply of downsides to those time periods and how horrifically nightmarish it would have been to live in those times if you weren't part of an extremely tiny group of extremely powerful people

[thegirlwiththelilactattoo]

no. 2, or some of my favorite things of 2022

Uh oh, did I say I was gonna blog weekly and now it's been 4 months? My bad!

In the time since I last posted I: started writing my diss/was told to stop writing my diss to do data analysis, completed fieldwork, added another member to my committee, and got accepted to two conferences. This is sweeping over a lot of things that sucked a lot and I'll need to talk about in therapy for the next 5 or so years, but that's grad school, babes. All in all it's been an incredibly stressful semester. I am really looking forward to having a restful break in December focusing on writing a chapter in December!

I also decided to turn this into a catch all blog for My Thoughts outside of academic things! And since it's the end of the year, I'm doing a lil favorite things of 2022.

Various Academic Things

Data analysis: I looked at other qualitative data softwares and chose to use ATLAS.ti for my dissertation. I am a...let's just say neurodivergent person and ATLAS.ti was the most aesthetically pleasing and intuitive software for me. It has a ton of features and data analysis capabilities, most of which I've barely used, but the ones I've tried have been useful.

Writing: I'm basic. I use Scrivener. It confuses me. I don't know if I recommend it.

Scheduling: I highly recommend Calendly. I should have used it from the jump to schedule dissertation interviews instead of going back and forth over email with my interlocutors. Now that I'm done with interviews, I use Calendly for students to schedule office hours appts. I like the Zoom and calendar integration, so once the link is sent, it's very hands off on my end.

Coworking: Re: the whole neurodivergence thing, coworking has been a real boon for me. My friend and I have a standing cowork session on Friday and it's been a great time for us to catch up and suffer through school stuff together. We keep each other accountable during our lil pomodoros and I miraculously get work done.

Going to the Writing Center??? I recently started going to my school's writing center for feedback on my applications and it's been so helpful.

Music

Beyoncé Gisele Knowles has run my life this year. "Renaissance" is the best album of 2022. I've also been running up "Currents" by Tame Impala for the entirety of this year and I don't see that changing in 2023.

Honorable Mentions: "Running Away" by VANO3000, "Them Changes" by Thundercat, "Eastside" by DAISY (RIP to such a good band)

Playlists I've Been Loving: roslyn rainy day kinda vibe, sad girl starter pack

Shows/Movies

Depression has sort of ruined my ability to consume visual media. And for the better part of the last decade, I have enjoyed and perhaps made it "a personality" to watch bad movies. I noticed this year that I became afraid (in a sense) to let myself watch movies that were good. It's a weird thing. My goal for next year is to get comfortable watching things that are good. I want to watch movies that make me feel something instead of solely engaging with a film because it's awful. That just doesn't speak to me anymore as a fulfilling way of being in the world.

At any rate, the most impactful movie I saw this year was Everything Everywhere All At Once. I saw this movie four times in the theatre and each time I got something new from it. It made me cry and laugh and feel like I could try to hope in a life that often feels meaningless.

Honorable Mentions: Bram Stokers Dracula dir. Francis Ford Coppola, The Batman dir. Matt Reeves, The Menu dir. Mark Mylod

Recipes

I have been LOVING this Kale Walnut Salad from frommybowl. It's super easy to make, refreshing, and is perfect to take advantage of really good apples.

Honorable Mentions: I've gotten rave reviews on this pumpkin bread.

Beauty/Aesthetics

This past year, I have finally mastered the wash and go. I used to be a twists girlie, but wash and gos last longer and look better on my hair. I think my hair is also the healthiest it's ever been. It's hard to pick a single product that I've loved the most for my hair, but the duo supreme is: Uncle Funky's Daughter Curly Magic and Innersense I Create Hold for a perfect wash and go every time.

Honorable Mentions: Sol de Janeiro Brazilian Crush Cheirosa 71 Perfume Mist, elf Brow Lift, ILIA The Necessary Eyeshadow Palette in Warm Nude

I think that's everything???? Sadly, I have read nary a book for leisure, but that's something for future me to ruminate on. I hope this was moderately interesting and I will try!!! to not take 4 months to post another thing :)