#Kenny really got that deadbeat uncle energy

[jayteacups]

Kenny got Levi a kitchen sponge for his birthday one year and tried to pass it off as a toy Spongebob. Kuchel looked at him like "😠 Spongebob's not blue, you dumbass" to which Kenny justified that "you dyed your hair hot pink in ninth grade, the sponge can be blue if he wants!" Meanwhile, little Levi's happily scrubbing things with his new 'friend'.

Why can I picture this all too well 😭 Kenny really being that minimum effort uncle 😭😭 probably forgot it was Levi’s birthday until basically the day before, when Kuchel texted him ‘so for Levi’s surprise birthday party you need to show up here at 5 o’clock, and we’ll hide the presents in the wine cabinet’ to which Kenny replied ‘… what surprise birthday party?’ 😭 so he rushes off to the supermarket, sees the pack of blue kitchen sponges and gets that idea, buys it and calls it a day. Kuchel is furious, to say the least, but keeps maintaining a nice smile so Levi doesn’t pick up on anything whilst hissing at Kenny through her teeth, ‘we’re going to talk later!!’

Levi is absolutely overjoyed at the gift, bless him, instantly shoots to his feet, toddles over and gives Kenny a big hug (but Kenny’s also standing so Levi’s just hugging Kenny’s knees really). He can’t stop beaming, neither Kenny nor Kuchel have seen Levi this excited over a birthday gift before 😭🤲🏼 whilst Kuchel is scolding Kenny to hell and back in her bedroom, Levi breaks into the cleaning cupboard in the kitchen, gets a bottle of antibacterial spray, climbs onto the kitchen counter and happily chatters away to his new spongy friend as he cleans. ‘And this is your new home now, and you and I will make this place very clean because Mama cleans all the time and she’s tired so we will make her less tired!! Oh, and we can teach Uncle Kenny how to be clean too because Mama keeps calling him stinky, and he kind of is, but don’t worry, he’s not that bad because he gave me you!! And now we’re friends!!’

Kuchel and Kenny catch the tail end of Levi’s ‘conversation’ with his new friend SpongeBob and tear up a little, and Kuchel sighs and is like ‘FINE I will let you off just this once, but it’s sad that you’ve been so bad at getting gifts for your nephew he’s this happy with a sponge. A SPONGE, Kenny. Do better next year, you jackass’ and he’s like ‘okay FINE jesus woman I’ll remember next year get off my back jeez’ and Kuchel is considering committing fratricide at this point