#Lee know series

[sanakimohara]

Minho coded relationship:

“You’re so mean you know that right?” Gf 🤝 “Then why are you blushing and getting so wet for me?” Bf

A very dynamic duo if you ask me…

[sluttywonwoo]

instead of you [part forty-one] || l.mh

pairing: [best friend’s brother] lee minho x college!reader ft. han jisung

summary: you didn’t expect to spend your summer pretending to be your best friend’s girlfriend- then again, you didn’t expect to fall for your best friend’s brother, either. 

warnings: swearing, angst, alcohol consumption, smut (18+ ; mdni)

word count: 3.2k

a/n: revamped my tom holland series from my main blog ( @wazzupmrstark ) to try and motivate myself to finish it!!

additional smut warnings: semi-public messing around, oral - m+f receiving

The other resorts along the shore were nice, yes, but they were also crowded to all hell. There’s no way you would have been able to relax at any of them. Not just because crowds make you anxious, but because Minho probably wouldn’t be able to show his face anywhere. He’d have to wear a hoodie to the pool or swim with a baseball cap on, and even those weren’t guaranteed to be foolproof. 

There were hardly any people occupying the outdoor spaces so late in the day so it was like you had the place to yourselves. You and Felix continued to play in the pool while Minho grilled steaks and Jisung worked upstairs. You offered to accompany Jisung while he cooked but he assured you that he was fine to do it himself. Sometimes you kept him company at home but you knew he liked to work alone as well. 

The room that you and Jisung were staying in was a standard hotel room but Nikki and Dom had a suite with a kitchenette that he could use to prepare the side dishes. 

You ate gathered around one of the fire pits as the sun sank beneath the waves in the distance. When it got too dark out, Dom lit the fire so that you could all see what you were eating. There were path lights littered around the resort but they weren’t bright enough to illuminate the adjacent sitting areas too. 

“I wish we had marshmallows,” you sighed. “We could roast them and make s’mores.”

“I think the bar sells little kits,” Jisung piped up. “I remember seeing a sign posted on their menu.”

“How convenient!” Nikki exclaimed. 

“Want me to grab some?” Minho offered, already standing from his seat. 

You had once again put yourself on the spot. Everyone was looking at you, waiting for your answer. 

“I-I’d feel bad. I’m the only one who wants them, so you don’t have to!”

“Don’t be silly, we’d all eat them,” Jisung assured you with a pat on your knee. 

“Yeah, I’ve always wanted to try s’mores,” Felix agreed. 

Your mouth dropped open in shock. “Wait, you’ve never had one?”

“They’re an American thing, babe.”

“Does that mean you’re the only other one here who has had a s’more?” you asked Jisung. 

“I might have had one before,” Minho added thoughtfully. 

“Might? You don’t remember?”

“Yeah, well, when we were on the first world tour we had a lot of bonfires and shit but I was pretty drunk at all of them so there could have been s’mores there, there could not have been. I dunno.”

“Anyway,” Nikki swooped in, averting the attention away from her eldest son’s anecdotes of underage drinking. “Minho, why don’t you go grab a few kits from the bar Ji mentioned? I think your father and I would like to try a s’more too.”

“How many do you think we need?” Minho asked. 

“It depends on how many each serves. Why don’t we start with two and if we run out of supplies we can send Felix up to get more.”

Felix made a face. “What, me?”

“It wouldn’t be fair to send Minho up twice,” Dom explained.

“What about Jisung?”

“He cooked dinner.”

“I’ll be right back,” Minho interjected, cutting Felix off before he could protest any further. “Does anyone want anything to drink while I’m over there?”

    He took everyone’s order and then disappeared in the direction of the bar. 

    “Do you think he’ll need help carrying stuff?” you whispered to Jisung after he left. 

“Oh, shit, maybe.”

“Should I go help him? Would that be weird?”

Jisung looked back toward his parents to check that they weren’t paying attention before answering. “No, I don’t think so. No one suspected anything other than me. Do you want me to go with you, though?”

“No, you cooked,” you reminded him, “you should stay and relax. I’ll go help him.”

He nodded. “Okay. Oh, but kiss me before you go.”

-

Minho was still waiting when you joined him at the bar. It was almost as deserted as the rest of the pool area. Only a couple of people were occupying the stools and they seemed to be strangers to each other, drinking in silence apart from the waves crashing on the shore nearby and the occasional sound of the blender.

“Hey, stranger,” you said, grabbing Minho’s attention with an elbow to his side. 

“Hey... did someone forget to ask for something?”

“No, I came to help you. We realized it’s a lot of stuff to carry all by yourself.”

He scoffed. “You doubted me?”

The bartender placed the drinks and s’mores kit down on the counter in front of Minho right at that moment, leaving both of you to size up all there was to bring back to the fire pit. 

“You could have carried all that without spilling anything?”

“Fine, maybe it’s good that you came,” he grumbled. 

“Maybe?”

He set his jaw and took a deep breath. “It is good that you came. Thank you for helping. Happy?”

“Ecstatic.”

You grabbed two of the drinks while Minho took the rest, holding the plastic bags of s’mores supplies between his teeth. 

Nikki and Dom cheered when you reappeared with everything. The twins looked marginally happier. It was honestly as much as you could ask for from them. 

You spent the rest of the evening teaching the Hans how to make, what was in your opinion, the perfect s’more. There were only a few skewers to go around so everyone had to take turns, but it was nice to be able to take your time with something and relax. There hadn’t been much time to do that on this trip. Jisung had warned you of that in the beginning but you were still way more exhausted than you expected to be at this point. At least it was almost over. 

The thought of the trip ending was one that you had been pushing to the back of your mind for weeks now. Especially now that Jisung knew what had happened, you didn’t want to think about what would happen when you went back home. Would you grow apart? Would he distance himself once he was no longer in forced proximity with you? Would Minho break up with you? It wasn’t just something you could ignore now. There were only a matter of days left. 

When it was over, you would go back to Seoul with the Hans until the summer ended officially. But that would be different too. 

“You’re burning your marshmallow, love,” Nikki said softly, putting her hand on your shoulder to get your attention. 

“Oh!” you exclaimed and pulled your skewer out of the heat. You blew the flame out and transferred it onto a graham cracker. 

“Do you want a new one?” Dom asked. 

“No, that’s okay! I like them burnt, actually. I just didn’t mean to leave it in the fire for so long. It could have made a mess.”

Jisung’s dad shrugged as if to say ‘suit yourself’ before taking the rod from you and reloading it with fresh marshmallows. 

If it was woodburning, the fire would slowly start to dwindle as the kindling turned to ash. Since it wasn’t, it was still burning as brightly as it had been at the start of the evening when Dom finally turned the propane off. Nikki collected the empty cups and dirty skewers to return to the bar. 

“Good night, kids. Don’t stay up too late.”

-

Felix was the first out of the four of you to go up to his room, leaving you with your best friend and... Minho. 

The pool area was completely empty by then. 

“I’ll uh, I’ll leave you two,” Jisung said and stood to leave. 

You grabbed his hand to stop him. “Wait, no, you don’t have to go.”

“Yeah,” Minho agreed, a little less convincingly. “You should stay.”

Jisung shook his head. “No thanks, I’d rather not third-wheel.”

“Ji-”

“Take as much time as you need,” he said to you. “Just don’t get fucking caught by anyone else.”

You waited for him to leave before slumping forward and sighing into your hands. 

“I thought you said he forgave you,” Minho whispered. 

“He did. That doesn’t mean he’s okay with it,” you sighed.

Minho leaned back and stretched his arm across the back of the loveseat, inviting you to sit with him. You crossed over to his side and joined him, allowing yourself to lean into his side. He wrapped his arm around you and squeezed your shoulder. It felt nice, to do something so domestic with him, even while sitting in complete silence. Still, you worried about someone seeing you.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked. 

“You.”

“What about me?”

“Just you.”

You didn’t want to give him the details and risk ruining the mood so you hoped he was content with that answer. Thankfully, he didn’t ask you to elaborate. 

You shivered suddenly, unintentionally but thankfully changing the subject. 

“Are you cold?” Minho asked. 

“A little.”

“Should I turn the fire pit back on?”

You shook your head. “No, it’s so dark out now. It’ll only draw attention to us.”

“I don’t want you to be cold, though.”

“I’ll be fine.”

Minho didn’t look convinced. “Why don’t we get in the hot tub? You still have your bathing suit on, right?”

“Are we allowed to?” 

He shrugged. “I don’t see why not.”

You followed Minho over to one of the many hot tubs on the property. It was tucked away behind the now-deserted tiki bar and also totally empty. Minho turned on the jets and ventured down into the water, holding his hand out for you to get in behind him. 

You let out a sigh as you sank into the bubbling water, closing your eyes and resting your head against the pool’s edge.  

“Better?”

“So much better.”

You looked over to see him smile. “Good.”

You hadn’t realized how cold you were until you were warm. The chill had seeped through your bathing suit too. You could feel it ebbing out of the fabric as well as your muscles the longer you sat in the water. 

Minho settled next to you and put his hand on your thigh. It was comforting even though his hand was still cold.  

“This is nice,” he said. 

“It is nice,” you agreed. “I like being able to do just nothing with you.”

“We don’t get a lot of time to do that, do we?”

“No, not really.”

“Guess that just means we have to enjoy it while we have it.”

You sat up to look at him, wondering if he meant something more than what was implied when he said that. He met your gaze and gave you a questioning look. 

“What?”    You shook your head and sank further into the bubbles. You were reading way too much into everything. You needed to get a grip. 

“What’s wrong?” Minho repeated. “Talk to me.”

“I’m scared to,” you finally admitted. 

It wasn’t much, but you were finally being honest with Minho instead of skirting around his questions like you usually did. You could tell your answer hurt him but you were afraid that you’d hurt yourself even more if you told him everything. You had a feeling the conversation was going there anyway, though, and there was little you could do to stop it. 

“Why?” he asked.

“Because I don’t know... what we are?” You cringed as you said it. “And I don’t want to ruin things by asking, you know, because I like what we have going on and I don’t want it to go away but I also don’t want to get my hopes up by thinking we’re something that we’re not but sometimes you do things that make me think you want something more than... whatever it is we’re already doing but- mph!”

You were cut off with a kiss, like something out of a movie. It was brief, but enough to disrupt your train of thought. You stared at him incredulously, trying to read his expression. 

His face was even but his eyes were warm. You wished you knew what he was thinking. Moonlight and the flickering flames of torches in the distance were just enough to illuminate his features. The quirk of his cupid’s bow, the flutter of his long eyelashes... 

 “What was that for?” you inquired, even though you knew what it was for. 

“You were spiraling.”

You sighed, dropping your head into your hands. “I can’t help it.”

“I know,” Minho said softly. “For what it’s worth though, I feel the same way.”

You lifted your head to look at him again, your vision slightly blurred by the water dripping down your face from your wet hands. “What?”

He hesitated. “I feel... what you said. I feel the same way.”

“I don’t even know what I said,” you laughed. 

“Me either, but I got the general vibe of it and I’m in agreement.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I... I thought I was making it kind of obvious that I wanted something serious with you.”

“You never said anything outright, though!”

“Because I didn’t know what you wanted,” he explained. “You never said anything either.”

“Well, you’re the man!”

Minho raised an eyebrow. “Oh, we’re going there? The feminism just evaporates from your body the moment you’re faced with confrontation?”

“See, you get it.”

He rolled his eyes. “I’m telling you now, okay? I want you. In all the ways you’re willing to let me have you.”

You swallowed hard, eyes burning. You didn’t want to start crying and you didn’t want Minho to see you crying so you kissed him again, with more urgency this time. You couldn’t think, hell, you couldn’t breathe, until he pulled away, leaving you wishing and hoping for more.

When your lips met for the third time, he pulled you under with him, just long enough to shock your senses. You gasped for air when you surfaced, pushing your wet hair out of your eyes.

“You’re not supposed to do that!” you scolded, sputtering as you shoved him. 

He stumbled backward onto the bench, falling seated again and pulling you on top of him. 

“You believe that bullshit?” he scoffed. 

“It’s not bullshit! It’s not good for you to put your head under the water in a hot tub!”

“I know people say that but why?”

“I... I don’t know why,” you admitted, “but I know you’re not supposed to.”

“See, you don’t even know!” You gave him a look. “Will you accept an ‘I’m sorry’ kiss?”

“That depends, are you actually sorry?”

He didn’t bother answering. Instead, he kissed you anyway, cradling the back of your head as he slipped his tongue past your lips. He tasted like s’mores and whiskey and chlorine, a combination so strange you couldn’t wrap your head around it. 

One of his arms dropped to your waist, wrapping around your body and pulling you closer until your chests were pressed together. You could feel him through his swim trunks, growing harder by the second. You were tempted to take him right there, but you were in public and having sex in a hot tub couldn’t be good either, right? That sounded like an infection waiting to happen.  

“Upstairs?” Minho asked breathlessly, lips only centimeters from yours. Not for the first time you wondered if he could read your mind. 

You nodded. “Yeah, upstairs.”

-

You dripped your way back to his room, shivering despite the thick towel wrapped around your shoulders. 

“Wanna hop in the shower?” Minho asked between kisses as he fumbled with the straps of your bikini. 

“Yeah, don’t want to get your bed all wet,” you replied. 

“That would happen whether or not we had just been in the pool,” he joked. 

“Hilarious.”

“Jesus, you’re freezing,” he hissed. “Let’s get these off of you, they’re so cold.”

“Is that the only reason you want them off?”

“I think we both know the answer to that.”

You knew Minho was expecting to have sex in the shower but you kind of wanted to fuck on the bed so you sucked his dick while he washed your hair and then took turns rinsing off before moving to his bed. You put your hair up in a towel to avoid the aforementioned wetness and wrapped yourself up in one of the hotel’s robes even though you knew it’d be coming right off. 

To your surprise, Minho left your robe on. He just undid the tie around your waist and let it fall open before shouldering himself between your legs. It was kind of like putting a towel down. He was killing two birds with one stone that way: protecting the sheets and keeping you warm. 

It didn’t take long for you to cum in his mouth. Minho knew your body like the back of his hand by now. It had taken him a fraction of the time it took your past lovers to learn what made you tick and he used all of that knowledge to his advantage. 

He kept going after you came the first time, eager to pull another from you, but you pulled him up by the hair to get his attention before he could get too into it. 

“Too much?” he asked. 

“Want you to fuck me,” you urged.

Thankfully, he was receptive to this and moved up so that he could position himself on top of you. He notched himself at your entrance and kissed you as he pushed himself inside, allowing you to taste yourself on his tongue before pulling away and wiping his face on your shoulder. 

“Ew!” you cried and tried to push him away. 

Minho looked offended. “What do you mean, ‘ew’? It’s you.”

“That doesn’t mean I want me all over what I’m wearing!” 

“Since when?” he joked. “Seems like it’s always all over what you’re wearing when you’re around me.”

“Can we please talk about something else?” you begged, suddenly embarrassed and grossed out at the same time. 

Minho laughed and pecked you on the cheek. “What would you rather talk about? The weather?”

You tightened around him as punishment, making him swear and bury his face in your neck. “Fucking hell, you succubus.”

You smiled politely and wrapped your arms around his neck to pull him closer. “Don’t people usually say that if she can talk at all, you’re doing it wrong?” 

He narrowed his eyes at you. “I was just taking it easy on you.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah, this was for your benefit,” he continued. “Didn’t want to overwhelm you.”

“How gracious of you.”

He clenched his jaw as he started fucking you faster, muttering sarcastically, “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize I was boring you.”

Ironically, you couldn’t respond right away, too caught up in the feeling of how deep he was inside of you to get any words out. 

“I forgive you,” you choked out finally. 

Your hands fell to his biceps, desperate for something to hold on to. You dug your nails into his skin, making him hiss through his teeth. 

“Harder,” he urged. You squeezed harder and he gasped. “Fuck yes, keep doing that.”

“Like this?”

“Just like that, baby. That’s perfect. You’re perfect.”

lmk what you think i always appreciate feedback!!

[hyunfilms]

blue side of the sky (lmh) | twenty one. (final)

♡ spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: waking up after 3 months with no recollection of your past, your friends do what they can to help you remember. except, they omit an important piece to the puzzle - afraid you would remember the heartbreak and hurt all over again.

—pairing: lee know x f. reader

—genre: (18+) exes to lovers, bestfriends to lovers au | fluff, angst, smut

—word count: 4.4k

—chapter content/warnings: not much, really just wrapping everything up mainly for these three, some crying, overwhelming feelings of nostalgia and missing someone, two cute flashback scenes

☁︎ on rotation: magic hour - jhene aiko

—a/n: thank you again for coming along on this journey <33 i appreciate you, and the support always means so, so much to me 🩵 i'll be back with chan's fic soon. 🥰

As the days go by, you find yourself feeling better in your own skin than you were a year ago. Despite the troubles you had endured, you feel like you're finally where you need to be. Things feel settled, time seems to be moving slower, your relationships traversing on calm waters. Because the flower shop had been booming with more customers and clients, Mrs. Pak made you lead florist while she hired another part-timer, Bora, who helped in between her classes. You're mainly at the shop, preparing pre-ordered bouquets and setting some aside for grabs at the store; while the other half of your time is now spent traveling to venues to set up for special events. You've greatly appreciated the bump in responsibilities, enjoying that most of your time is spent doing what you love. During nights or weekends that you are free, you occasionally head to the pottery studio to continue creating pieces to add to your collection or sell.

As for Minho, the time felt like it did you well. But in a sense where you were able to say your peace to the past, where you were able to process the highs and the lows in that chapter with Minho. Though things changed the trajectory of everything, Minho has never left your side. He continued to create enough distance until you were ready to bring him closer, always ready to support you in any way that he could. But, there was never any pressure to be more, to be less. Minho let you be and that's because he loved you;

And he loved you enough to let you go.

Loved you enough to let you properly conquer this world without him holding you back.

In the end, you will always love Minho, but you're realizing that loving him as who you are now, as where you are now, as his bestfriend, will always be more than enough. So you let it sit the way it is now, afraid to force something that wasn't meant for the next chapter of your life.

In the end, you will have Minho the way the universe allows you to, and vice versa. 

In the end, you'd rather have a part of him than lose him at all. 

"Hey." You pick up the call, gathering some last minute items and tossing them into your bag.

"Hey, I'm out front." Minho says on the other line while he shuffles around in his car.

"Okay, I'll be right there."

"Take your time." You purse your lips together before ending the call. You run your chapstick across your lips once more before grabbing your bag and heading out of the door. You walk through the side door seeing Minho relaxing in the driver's seat— scrolling through his phone. Since it's been a good amount of time, your stomach no longer drops when you see him, heart no longer feels like it's beating out of your chest, palms no longer wet and sweaty from anxiety. 

And it feels nice. 

Refreshing.

Peaceful.

"Hey." He says, turning to you as soon as you swing the door open and settle into the passenger's seat. You give him a tiny smile before buckling in your seatbelt. "All good?"

"Yeah, I'm good."

"Is it too warm?" Minho adjusts the heat slightly.

"No, it's good. It's perfect." He nods, driving off to your childhood neighborhood. "Cafe is okay? Surprised you were able to run off." 

"Mhm. Yeah well, JJ's got it, plus we hired another person to help out. It's been pretty smooth lately."

"That's good. Then, you're able to do more for your dance group and the studio, right? Just like you wanted?" He nods.

"Yeah, I am. We're finishing up for our competition next weekend."

"I'm glad you have more time for that now. I'm sure it'll go great."

"How's the shop and Mrs. Pak? Still busy, I'm assuming?" You sigh and let out a chuckle.

"Yeah, it's booming lately. But, Bora's been a lot of help when I can't be around so I'm grateful for her. I was just afraid of Mrs. Pak having to handle a lot on her own again."

"I'm sure she appreciates everything you do for her and the shop." You nod.

"I have to travel next weekend. The client that hired us for the event is about 2 hours away."

"You'll be okay?"

"I'll be okay. I know I can call you guys if anything comes up."

"Okay." He looks at you, content with your answer. And when Minho looks at you, he still sees love, feels love. 

He always will. 

But, he's also gotten to understand what it truly means to put you first, to put your needs above his own, to be your bestfriend. For a moment, he felt lost when you distanced yourself; no longer by his side like you used to be. He wondered how he could salvage everything and fix the problems overnight to bring you close again. He wondered what he could do differently this time, wondered how he should act, how he should talk, how he could paint himself in a different picture. He felt exhausted from trying to control every single aspect of life, micromanaging every little detail he could. 

Then, he realized the answer was in front of him this entire time. He realized how much he was holding you back when you started to smile more, when you started to laugh and move with grace more comfortably; dancing along with the wind, while your eyes held more life than they used to. He realized you needed to shape your own life outside of him, outside of Jisung and your friends, outside of Uncle Adrian.

Create your own version of the greenest grass, the bluest skies, the starriest nights.

This is the unconditional love you needed, even if it was from a distance.

As he continues to drive, he peeks over from time to time, watching as you keep your eyes glued to the surroundings as it passes by. He can't really tell if things are starting to feel familiar, or if you are trying to dig deep within yourself to find that familiar feeling. Overall, you seem to be content, and you don't seem to be regretting your decision of asking Minho to take you here.

When Minho finally drives down a familiar street, he slows his speed a bit; pointing towards certain places while telling you as much as he remembers from his own memory. Although Minho wasn't a part of your life during this point of your childhood, you and Jisung used to take him to this neighborhood pretty often— bringing you to the convenience store you always hung out at, the grocery store your families frequented, the park that had the monkey bars you and Jisung used to fight over. Even though he wasn't there, he felt included. Always.

"You guys took me here quite a few times." Minho points at the convenience store. "We'd go in there and spend our spare change because they had $1 surprise gifts." Minho chuckles a bit. "We'd get a range of things, like random sticker books. Bracelets. Keychains. You even got lucky once and got your favorite pink pencil case out of that." You giggle.

"I still have that sitting on my desk." He nods.

"Yup. We'd spend so much visiting there. They always had our favorite snacks. Sometimes, there would be a hotteok cart nearby. It stopped coming after awhile though." He turns down a road that leads into a residential area. Most of the houses were designed similarly, probably having the same layouts and just enough rooms for families to live comfortably. It's a quiet street, barely any kids playing out front or around on the block. Minho parks his car along the curb, pointing at the park that's a bit of a walk down a path into the middle of the area. "Wanna talk a walk to the park with me?" He looks at you as he unbuckles his seatbelt.

"Sure." He gives you a small smile before heading out of the car, finding his place next to you as you stand and breathe in the crisp fresh air. He digs his hands into his jacket pockets, careful to not walk too quickly. You finally catch wind of a few kids playing around at the park while their parents hang around. Minho chuckles a bit when he hears a child screaming and laughing while their father spins them around on the roundabout; pleading for their dad to go faster.

"Jisungie hated that thing. Even when we'd come here in high school."

"Let me guess, he almost fell off of it." 

"Yup." He lets out a breath. "Anyway, you and Jisung grew up at this park. When we came here all together, we'd play around on the monkey bars and wait for the ice cream truck to come. That ice cream truck sold the specific brand of strawberry shortcake ice cream you loved so much. You refused to buy anything else."

"You know, now that you mention it, I haven't had that in awhile." You giggle and kick at the leaves beneath your feet, eyes now darting to the kids chasing each other around the park.

"You loved that ice cream." He walks over to the tree on the opposite side. "We used to play the dumbest games here, like tag. Hopping from bridge to bridge, trying not to step on the ground or else we'd be out." You laugh.

"Everything sounded so fun."

"And chaotic." You watch as he looks at the tree bark, running his fingers across the surface before calling you to his side. "Come look at this."

"Hm?" You hum, walking around to stand next to him. You let out a small gasp seeing your names carved messily onto the bark, the 'o' shape on your mouth slowly forming into a tiny smile. "This was in high school?"

"Yup. We spent a lot of good times here." You look at him. "Ready to walk to your house? It's just down this way." He points towards the ongoing path behind him.

"Mhm." You nod. 

The walk is quiet, but it's a comfortable silence that falls between you and Minho. It's quick anyways, especially being that you thoroughly enjoy taking in the fresh air while observing your surroundings. You can hear the birds chirping amongst the trees that line the pathway, the dirt beneath your feet with every step. You follow Minho as he turns down the corner and stops, pointing at a dark brown, ranch-style family home. It's not small, but not the biggest; obvious that the maintenance wasn't a high priority over the years, the paint chipping off in certain areas.

"That's it." You stand and stare, taking in the small, quaint house sitting by itself— a good distance separating it from the next house over. 

"Hm." You hum. "It does feel like home." You say, unable to explain the huge wave of nostalgia that suddenly overcame your senses. "I can't put my finger on it, but it certainly feels like home." Minho nods. "I can't believe we were here. This is where I grew up."

"Yeah."

"Wish I could remember it." At this point, an elderly lady comes out— walking onto the small porch with her cane. She notices you two and gently smiles, heading towards the flowers planted along the walkway into the house.

"I don't usually see pretty faces like yours come around. Are you from here?" She asks with a sweet smile, tending to her growing rose bush.

"I, um, grew up in this home when I was really young. I just wanted to come by and see it. I hope you don't mind that we're standing here looking at the house." She chuckles.

"Nonsense. My son bought this house but eventually moved out of the country, then had us move in here."

"That's nice."

"Does it look the same as you remember it?" Minho looks at you, but before he could intervene, you respond simply with a :

"I think so. Feels like it."

"I'm glad." She looks at her door then back at you two. "Do you, maybe, wanna come in?" You shake your head, afraid of it being too overwhelming, too much. Especially for someone like you, who is still learning life and the world.

"Oh, no. Thank you, though. We're going to leave soon. Seeing it from here is enough."

"You sure?" Minho asks quietly. You look at him and nod.

"Okay, sweetheart. If you ever change your mind, please knock. My husband and I are just around in the house."

"Thank you." You give her a small, curt bow before turning to Minho. "Let's go."

"Okay." Is all he says before following you down the path, creating enough distance between you and the house before chiming in again. "You sure you don’t wanna go in, Y/N?"

"Mhm. I'm just afraid it'll be too overwhelming for me, and I won't even know why. I'll have nothing to compare the feeling to.” You pause. “I promise. I'm okay seeing it that way. I think—" You sigh. "I think that feeling of seeing it and having it feel like home is enough. I don't want anything else to take over that."

"Okay." He pops his arm out for you to take and hold onto it. "That sounds good to me. We can make our way to the cemetery at a good time."

"Thanks, Minho."

"Course." The two of you continue to the car, laughing and smiling at the kids that are still playing in the park. You plop into the passenger's seat and buckle your seatbelt, rubbing your hands together to get rid of the morning cold. Minho checks on the flowers in the backseat, making sure they're still sitting prettily before hopping into the driver's seat.

"Good?" You nod. "Ready to go see your mom?"

"I am."

"Mmkay." Is all Minho responds with before pulling away from the curb. The cemetery is close to an hour drive in the opposite direction, and Minho makes sure you're comfortable for the ride over. He keeps it rather lowkey, playing soft music in the background while keeping the heat on. He doesn't really try to make small conversation not only because he's not much of a person for it, but because he can also tell your mind is already occupied. He does ask you from time to time if you're hungry and if you'd like to eat first, but you respond with a soft 'no;' reassuring him that all is well through a smile before leaning your head against the window.

Uncle Adrian was caught up at work, but he lets you know he'll meet you at the cemetery as soon as he's able to slip away and pack it up for the day, telling you to take your time and sit with her for as long as you'd like. You aren't really sure what you're gonna do when you get there though, to be honest. You're not even sure how long you plan to stick around. But, thankfully, Minho doesn't mind. He knows you need this right now, and he'll do whatever he can to help ease this.

To ease the transition in closing this chapter, in moving forward.

☁︎ FLASHBACK | EARLY COLLEGE

Minho is woken up in the middle of the night when he hears you giving off small whimpers. You're still snuggled against him, enveloped in his arms; though, he feels you twitch every now and then. He looks down at you, brushing the hair away from your face when he realizes you're still asleep and probably having a bad dream.

"Y/N." He says softly with a gentle shake at the shoulder. "Baby." He says a bit louder when you don't budge. He's a little bit rougher with his shake, finally getting you to slowly pry an eye open before the other follows suit.

"Hm?" You sleepily ask, rubbing at your face.

"You were having a bad dream."

"No."

"No?"

"My mom visited me in my dream. I was crying for her."

"I'm sorry, love."

"Nothing to be sorry about."

"Do you remember if she said anything to you?" You nod and wrap your arms around him, hugging him tightly as you recall the best parts of your dream. Although it was a happy, beautiful dream, you found yourself tearing up at the thought of how angelic and peaceful your mom looked. At least, you could confirm that she was okay and that she was happy— wherever she was at.

"Mhm. She said she missed me, and that she was really happy to see me. She said she thinks about me all the time and that she's always by my side no matter what." You sniffle. Minho lifts your chin with his finger, wiping away at the tears that manage to slip down your bottom lid and down your cheeks. 

"I'm glad she visited you."

"I am, too." You begin to cry a bit harder as reality hits you, the thought of not actually being able to physically hug your mom feeling incredibly painful tonight. "I miss her so much, Min. I wish I could hug her."

"I know you do, baby. I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. I just got scared. I wish I could do more to help."

"No, it's okay. Just really miss her. But I'm glad she seems to be happy."

"And I'm sure she's very happy because she can see you doing well and being so strong."

"I hope so."

"I know so." Minho gives off a tiny chuckle before pulling you close and hugging you tightly. "Let's get back to sleep, yeah? We've got a couple of more hours before we need to be up."

"Okay."

"I love you."

"I love you, too." You whisper against his chest, shutting your eyes in hopes of finding sleep again.

☁︎ END

It's a bit past lunch time when you arrive at the cemetery, and you still don't feel hungry. You do feel nervous for whatever reason, somewhat anxious, even. Minho parks in a free space, shutting off the car while letting out a breath.

"You okay?" He looks at you while you stare out of the window. All you can do is look at him and nod once more before unbuckling your seatbelt and stepping out of the car. You grab the bouquet of flowers from the back seat, hoping to rearrange them at her grave. Minho takes lead down the grassy field, stopping a few feet away from the car. He stands above a grave, looking down at the flat headstone before laying down a blanket and turning to you. You slowly approach him, letting him throw an arm around you and give it a soft squeeze.

"It's her." Is all he hears you say before you kneel to the ground and place the flowers down. It takes a moment before you register what's happening, before you realize that you're finally meeting her after all this time. 

Again.

You take another moment just to observe, to sit and be still. Then, you look at her picture, and you just cry. You cry, and cry. Because you miss her, because all you feel is overwhelming love for her.

You shakily run your finger down the picture, her smile so beautiful, so calming.

So peaceful.

You wish you could hug her tightly.

"I wish I could hug her." You say softly, and Minho can't help but gently rub your back to help ease your crying. Though, it's nice to know that you aren't alone, and you know you never will be. You do believe that your mom has been here with you, never leaving your side— especially throughout everything that's happened.

"We can stay here for as long as you need to." Minho adds. You quietly begin to arrange her flowers, Minho sitting back after he's added the bowl of oranges to the headstone. He watches as you delicately fix each stem, each flower, helping them stand tall and long. 

"Do they look okay?"

"They're beautiful." You give him a small smile.

"Mrs. Pak just got these in a couple of days ago. The baby blue Baby's Breath? They're so pretty."

"They are." 

"I hope she likes them."

"I'm sure she does." You sit back contently, hands falling to your lap. 

"Minho, I really wish I could remember the moments I've had with her. I think that's been the most upsetting part about everything. Not remembering the times I've had with my mom. Cause I can't get those back, and I can't necessarily make new ones with her."

"I'm sorry, I know. But, I know Uncle Adrian would be more than happy to walk down memory lane with you whenever you're ready. And I know she'd be happy to see you making new ones with him. She's with you everywhere you go, and she's in everything you do. You know that, right?"

"Mm, yeah. I just.. I don't know. I wish I could have a pass to go back in time to talk to her, or see her in my dreams." You sigh. "At least I can talk to her here, though. I hope she hears me."

"She does." Minho responds softly, watching as you stare at your mom's photo. He doesn't interrupt, gives you a moment to let your thoughts be.

To let you hold space. For you, for your mom.

And it's like this for awhile. Minho doesn't mind, especially since the weather has cleared up a bit and gotten warmer.

"Yo!" Jisung suddenly comes up the path, hands dug deep into his jacket. "Sorry I'm a bit late, I got caught up with some work stuff even though I told them I was taking off early today." He lets out a sigh as he sits next to you on the blanket. "You guys okay?"

"Mm yeah. I think so." You murmur.

"You sure, cielo?"

"Mhm. I just miss her, is all." Jisung pulls you into a hug and rubs at your arm while looking down at her headstone.

"Whenever we went on trips, your mom would always buy me bags of my favorite gummies. She'd always take us to get ice cream, or to the local convenience store to buy whatever snacks we wanted. Sometimes, she'd sit outside with us just to get some air and people watch." Jisung chuckles. "Your mom was really like my second mom. She was the nicest person. Always smiling. Kinda like you, I guess?" You laugh.

"Wow, you guess?" He shrugs. 

"Twins, for real." Jisung continues to tell you stories about the trips your families have taken together— how she would never let you two be unhappy, always willing to take you two to the places you wanted to visit even if everyone else was tired. She'd patiently wait for you two to finish playing, swimming, whatever it was— as long as you two were happy.

Then, the three of you find yourselves sitting quietly in front of her grave, looking out at the hills beyond it. The sky is bright and blue with no clouds in sight, weather warm with a very gentle breeze. The trees around you are full, showing off their healthy green leaves.

You sit, you breathe, you feel.

You turn to Jisung who is quietly dusting off your mom's grave, picking at the old, tiny, brown leaves that have accumulated in the corner. A small smile grows at your lips when you notice how focused he is on the small, tiny details; finger tracing the edges of the flat headstone. Then, you turn to Minho, who quietly sits by your side, looking out at the distant city view ahead. He suddenly meets your gaze, a smile growing at the corners of his lips. He pulls you into his arm, letting you rest your head on his shoulder.

No words being exchanged, no words needed to be said. 

Nothing.

You've come to know what the blue side of the sky truly means, what it truly feels like. Because there is so much pain, anguish, hurt in this world, so many grey skies and loud, aggressive storms. 

But not in this moment.

In this moment, there is only happiness, comfort, peace. Blue skies and warmth. 

In this moment, there is only love.

☁︎ FLASHBACK | EARLY CHILDHOOD

"Y/N." Your mom says as she holds your hand as you attempt to walk in a straight line on the curb. You giggle when you almost lose balance, your grip around her fingers tightening as you regain it. "Y/N love, are you listening to mommy?"

"I am, I am." You giggle and look up at her, flashing her that million-watt smile she adores.

"Okay, good. I just want you to listen to me for a second."

"Okay, mommy."

"You know, the world isn't a scary place, but it isn't perfect either, love." You continue to walk silently along the curb, listening to your mom. "You know mommy is always doing her best to raise you well, right?"

"Mhm, mhm!"

"I don't want you to grow up fearing new places, new adventures, new people. But, I also want you to protect yourself and save yourself for those that really deserve you. Every bit of you. Okay? I'm trying my hardest to raise you to be brave and strong, and I know you will be. But sometimes, you can't be. And that's okay. That's why it's so important to have good people around you. Good friends. People that care about you and love you no matter what. Always surround yourself with love."

"I have friends." You smile at her and she smiles back. "Like Jisungie."

"I know. And Jisungie is a perfect example of a good friend who will never leave your side. But sometimes, Jisungie might not always be there. What are you going to do?"

"Be strong! Because I am strong!" She laughs when you raise your arms to show off your muscles.

"Right, be strong. You're my brave girl. You will always be my brave and strong girl. Life may not always be that kind to you, but I know you'll be able to overcome anything. You deserve the very best, always. Never let yourself believe otherwise."

"Is it because I'm like you, mommy?"

"Yes." She giggles. "Yes it is. You're just like me." She scoops you into her arms before planting a kiss on your cheek and pointing upwards. "You know, if you ever have bad days, or if you ever need a reminder. Just look up at the blue sky." She pauses and taps the tip of your nose. "Because no matter what, that blue sky will always come back after the rain. It'll never let those grey skies completely take over no matter how hard the rain comes down. It will always come back and be there for you."

☁︎ END

♡ taglist: @ppiri-bahng @jihanlovic @meloncremesoda @sweetlikecherry @asjkdk @hoes4lino @skzddicted @skzho @edgaralienpoe @harui-zen @bestleeknowstan @havenwithleeknow @septicrebel @heesdazed @borahae-reads @yoontaethings @pearbunny @bintificreads @lukeys-giggle @ajxreads @everglowdaisies @allaboutsan @endzii23 @leeknowsramen @heres-your-ramen2000 @morningstardada @mal-lunar-28 @downbadreading @lilysophie @feelikecinderella @urmomma0324 @ddazed-lhs @djeniryuu @melanctton @i8rsie @maru-matt @sleepyleeji @taerifin @nattisbored @jisunglyricist @m111nho @drhsthl @nixtape-foryou @arminseas @guiltycoco @syuuji @sulkygyu @cadihyo @reianagarcia @leeknowyah @smndjdufuehr @dprkbyn @xxibreinaxx @mxnsxngie @reiheis @mellowmentalitydragon @vixensss

[djeniryuu]

forgot to post that these 2 have been updated as of 27/03/24 🙃

Bang Chan Fic Recs

Lee Minho Fic Recs

[emilyssky]

Chapter 13: Over Again

PAIRING: Lee Know! X fem!reader

GENRE(S): college au, smut, angst

WARNINGS: Mentions of violence and abuse, depression, self harm, eating disorders etc.. mentions of blood, swearing, smoking, smut [ dirty talk, oral; giving and receiving, choking, spanking, praising, degradation, pet names, sometimes Minho is a dick :)

SUMMARY: "Do you remember what you told me the first time we met?"

"What?"

"You said; Always leave people a little better than you found them" he looked at the floor with a small smile for a few seconds and then his eyes found mine. "You really annoyed me when we first met. I envied your optimism and excitement for life. But each time I saw you, I felt a certain thrill. You made me angry, you made me laugh., you made me feel everything. Something about you made me feel a little more alive each time. I know I fucked up and I know I'm an asshole but I'm also brutally in love with you."

Author’s note: I will for sure be editing this within the next few days so please excuse the mistakes, enjoy <333

My heart was drumming against my chest, the back of my neck and hands sweating as I held the bottom of my dress and ran. I ran like I'd never run in my entire life. 

Hyunjin, out of breath as well, his face laced with panic and concern, extends a hand in front of me, blocking my way, just before we enter the living room, where the dance continues, like nothing has happened.

"What?" My head snaps to him. 

"We can't draw any attention, we have to be discreet."  He breathes out sharply.

I narrow my eyes at him, my mind way too consumed with panic to understand that he's right. "Hyunjin, I don't care about the stupid party. Where are they?"

I feel Minhos's fingers gently brush against my back, silently letting me know he's there. He stands behind me, his breathing hard as well but his panic is way more contained and controlled compared to mine and Hyunjin's.

"Did you tell Seungmin?" Minho leans closer to Hyunjin, his eyes searching the room and I do the same, finding Seungmin and Han talking in the corner of the room, their faces clouded as Seungmin presses his phone to his ear. Jeongin and Changbin are nowhere to be found.

"Yes, he has people looking into it." Hyunjin fixes his hair and adjusts his suit before walking calmly towards the door, Minho and I following.

The elevator ride felt like 2 hours instead of 15 seconds, and my legs wouldn't stop bouncing up and down. The minute the door opened, I was the first one out, running towards the exit of the building. 

"Y/n, wait!" Minho yells my name, both of them running to catch up with me.

When I spot them, Chan leaning against his car and Felix seating in the back seat with the door open, my heart dropped. 

"Oh, my god." I run to them, my choking words making their heads snap to us as we reach them.

"What the fuck happened?!" Minho says.

My hands instantly reach to touch Chan, while Hyunjin kneels in front of Felix taking in his injuries. Both of their faces are beaten up, with bruises and cuts everywhere, their hair tangled and their clothes messy like someone was trying to peel them off of them. I try to see how bad his beatings are, my fingers trying to lift his chin but he keeps his head down, blood coating his bottom lip. 

 "Chan.." I gasp, my eyes watering at the sight. 

"I'm okay, I'm fine.." He mumbles the words that I've heard so many times before but know to never believe. I shake my head, wrapping my arms around his slumping shoulders, his forehead hitting my chest. 

"That's not 'okay ' Chan..." Hyunjin spits, his eyes and hands all over Felix, who sits in silence, trying to control his breathing, his eyes blurry.

The sight of Chan hurt breaks my heart but the sight of Felix being hurt fills me with pure rage.

"Who did this?" Minho growls, his tone low, sending chills down my spine. He stands next to me, his arms glued to his side, his fingers curling into firsts. Chan lifts his head slowly, his eyes locking with Minho's and a silent conversation between them plays out for a few seconds, until Minho scoffs loudly, turning around. He buries his hands in his hair and starts pacing.

"I should have fucking killed him." He says under his breath.

I look between them confused. "What? What do you mean?"

I turn to Hyunjin, hoping for answers just as his face shifts from confused to pissed, his eyes narrowing and jaw locking. "Piece of shit."

It takes me a second, the wheels in my head turning, my mind catching up, realizing. And suddenly my heart drops even more. "It was Jackson, right?" The question leaves my trembling lips. I feel my body being showered with fear, fear like I've never felt before, and guilt. Jackson has put me in positions to be scared of him many times before but not like this, he's never gone that far. To hurt, physically hurt my friends in order to get to me is scary, the lengths that he's willing to go to and the things he will do.

"If it were only him, it wouldn't have been a problem." Felix's deep voice makes my head snaps his way.

"How many were they?" 

"4." Chan answers Hyunjin, the back of his hand coming up to his bleeding nose.

"I-I don't understand.." I'm in shock. I don't know what to say or do besides hold my best friend between my arms. 

"What don't you understand?" Minho's head snaps to me, his whole face burning with anger. "Like you didn't already know that your ex-boyfriend is a fucking piece of shit!" His eyes are cold yet his face is filled with rage.

"Minho." Chan says, warningly, probably feeling how his tone and words shook me a bit in his arms.

Minho stops pacing, now standing facing us with his hands on his hips. "He's a dead man. He's done."

"Okay, come down-" Chan starts but Minho cuts him off.

"Come down?" He says, with the straightest face ever. "Come down? You're asking me to calm down while your face and his," He points at Felix, still dangerously calm. "look light that." He states.

"Yes," Hyunjin's the one to answer. "You need to come down, 'cause it's your fault that they got  in this mess in the first place." Hyunjin stands tall, his face hard staring at Minho.

"Hyunjin..." Felix reaches for his hand but Hyunjin pulls away sharply. 

Minho's expression twitches a bit, clearly not expecting Hyunjin to say something like that. "I'm sorry that I stood up for her. " Minho takes a step towards him. "Someone had to." 

I unwrap my hands from Chan, noticing the squint of Hyunjin's eyes and the tightness of his jaw. 

"Stop talking like you're the only one that cares about her!" Hyunjin scoffs an angry laugh. "Cause you weren't there for her when shit went down." He takes a step as well, coming face to face with Minho's stone-cold expression. "I was." He points at his chest. "And Chan was, and Felix was!" 

The frustration and anger in his voice is something that I haven't heard in a long, long time and it makes my legs move, now standing closer to them, my body alarmed by both of their radiating emotions. Chan's on his feet as well, looking carefully between his two friends.

"I never said that I'm the only one  that cares." I can clearly tell that he's being careful with his words, holding himself back. "But he clearly deserved it."

Hyunjin clenches his jaw. "And what about them?" He motions towards Chan and Felix, his eyes not leaving Minho's. "Do you think that they deserved it too? Cause they paid the price for your reckless behavior. You care about her, don't you care about them?"

Minho's face flashes with emotion. "Of course I care, you know I do." His voice drops.

"Hyunjin, that's enough." Chan steps in, his protective instinct kicking in. Chan hates fighting and will do anything to avoid it, especially between friends.

Hyunjin however is not backing down, his emotions overtaking him. "Y/n told you to stay out of it, now she will have to clean your mess."

"Enough." Felix's voice booms, silencing all of us. His head hanging low, his expression unreadable. "Minho please just don't do anything."

Minhos's face visibly softens at Felix's pleading tone, hitting a nerve.

"There's no reason to fight." His focus turns to Hyunjin whose chest is still rising and falling. "We'll see how we're gonna deal with this later, we should just rest."

"Felix is right." I step in, touching Hyunjin's arm. Hyunjin tends to get really protective over his friends so his reaction is understandable. His eyes find mine, letting a heavy sigh. "Let's not fight, it's none's fault that Jackson's a dick. If anything it's mine, 'cause I was the one that dated him." I chuckle, trying to lift the heaviness of the atmosphere. 

Hyunjin's head falls a little, nodding. "I know, I'm sorry." His hand rubs gently on my shoulder.

"Seungmin is looking into it. Let's just go home and talk about it tomorrow ." Chan sighs.

"You're coming with us." Felix states.

"What?" My brows come together. 

"Why?" Minho steps forward, his head tilting with curiosity.

Felix's gaze moves between us before setting on Minho. "You never know. It's safer for her to stay with us, just for tonight."

Minho sighs, his shoulders visibly stiffening. "I hate this." He groans. "The fact that we have to act like this because of that motherfucker, like we're scared of him or something."

"I just don't understand why he would do something like this?" I whisper, questioning out loud. "It doesn't make sense, what's there to gain from beating you up? It would make sense to go after Minho, but why you two?" 

My heart tightens the more I look at them, the heaviness in my consciousness growing. I hate this, this is my worst fear and the thing I was desperately trying to avoid; dragging people into my mess. I can't help but look at him, my eyes searching his for anything that they can offer me at this moment to make the pain in my chest a little less unbearable. He stares back, his eyes big and full with a handful of emotions, silently comforting me. And then he nods, a tiny move of his head. And that's all I need, weirdly enough. 

"I spoke with Seungmin and the rest of the guys, letting them know that we're okay and I told Em to stay here tonight, so let's just go." Chan says, still looking at his phone, his fingers typing aggressively. 

"Okay, fine." I move to get inside the car.

"No." Chan stops me. "Minho is driving you."

"Why?"

Minho rests his hands on his hips, his hair a perfect mess and his face expressionless still, staring between me and Chan.  "I'm not gonna do anything stupid!" He lifts his hands in defense.

I shake my head with a small smile. "I'll babysit, don't worry. I'll see you at the frat."

"Excuse me?" He gives me a dirty look as I walk towards him.

"Let's go." I give him a small push on his shoulder, earning a series of laughs from behind me.

.

.

.

The air is suddenly cold against my skin, and everything slowly creeps in as we speed down the road. I try to somehow wrap my head around everything that's been happening but I can't. I can't really recall the last time everything was so messed up. I mean, I'm used to having a mess in my head but now that all this shit is actually happening I don't really know what to do or how to deal with all this. And even though fear is slowly taking over my head, even though I know that I have to find a way to fix everything all I can think about is him. Him, and how everything now is somehow about him. I hate to admit even to myself that he has concerned every piece of my mind and especially after tonight it will be impossible for me to stay away from him, no matter how he will treat me when the night is over. I just hope that somehow all this will be over when I close my eyes tonight, and when the daylight creeps into our lives things will be different. Simple. 

"Y/n?" His voice snaps me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah?"

His eyes leave the road for a few seconds, scanning my face.  "I said what are you thinking." 

"Um," I mumble, my mind still lost in thought. "Just thinking."

"I hope you're thinking about me and not about that piece of shit." 

I chuckle, turning to look at him.

"Do you want me to go and beat him up?... Again?" He adds.

"Do you have a death wish?" I shake my head.

"He does." His eyebrows go up, his eyes not leaving the road. He rests his back against the seat, one hand lazy holding the steering wheel while the other rests against his thigh and my fingers start toying with my dress, trying to keep themselves from touching it. His hand, his thigh...him.

His eyes catch me and a knowing smile grows on his lips. "I told you."

"What?"

"It's the 'Minho' effect."

I chuckle again, this time louder. "Shut up." I turn to look at him again and as tiny as his smile was I caught it. Not a smug or cocky smile, a true smile, soft and genuine.

He sighs, heavily, his teeth biting his bottom lip as he lets his head fall back against the seat. His free hand then moves from his thigh and gently takes mine, our fingers intertwining. 

I stare down at our hands in my lap, fighting a grin that slowly fades into a heavy sigh of my own. "What are we gonna do?" I finally ask.

He doesn't answer, his jaw and grip on the wheel tightening.

"Minho, he's not okay." I look down at our hands again, feeling his thumb brushing against my skin, gently. "He's really spiteful and obsessive and he does things without caring about the consequences cause he never had to face them, thanks to his family. But he's mentally losing it, I can tell that he's not doing well. He's been struggling with these episodes and blackouts and anger issues his whole life. "

"Angel," He cuts me off, his face stone cold." I don't give a shit. He touched my friends. Hell, he touched you." He shakes his head. "He doesn't deserve pity. He had a shitty childhood, cool, tell him to join the fucking club along with the millions of other people that did as well." He spits. "And maybe see a therapist instead of beating up people.? Just saying." He lifts his shoulders. 

"Well," I drag out. "You did beat him up too so... you're not handling your anger perfectly as well."

His eyes snap to mine, his face scarily expressionless. "Could you be just a little bit grateful for that, like damn?"

I tilt my head, wearing a soft smile at how this moment feels. "Thank you," I whisper, and mean it. " I appreciate what you did for me."

He looks at me, and I count the seconds his eyes study my face. Oh, how I love being looked at by him. He brings our intertwined hands to his lips, leaving a soft kiss on the back of mine. "There's not much that I wouldn't do for you angel."

Heat spreads across my face, my heart warm and beating faster at his words, and I can't say anything or do anything other than admire him as he continues to drive. I desperately wanna ask him about what this is, and what is it that he feels for me but the fear that I might ruin such a beautiful and rare moment for us stops me. So instead I seat back and let myself enjoy the car ride and the feeling of his hand in mine. It's then that I notice that the road we're taking is not the usual way to my apartment.

"Hold no, where are we going?" I look around curiously.

"I need to drop something off at a friend's house."

I narrow my eyes at him. "What friend?"

"Just a friend." He shrugs, not looking at me.

Here we go again. "Can we stop with the secrets?" 

"Can't you just relax?" He snaps back. "There's no secret. I honestly just have to drop something off."

"Great, sure, just drag me along to your weed dropoffs, without telling me." I roll my eyes at him as he stops the car. 

He takes his seat belt off and takes my chin between his fingers, forcing my eyes to his. "Cut the grumpy shit," He smirks and his eyes fall to my lips " It will take 10 seconds." And then he kisses me. It's short, only a few seconds, but enough to make my stomach fill with excitement. "Wait here." 

He exits the car, his body moving so smoothly as he walks all the way to the front door of the house we parked in front of. I pull my phone out of my small purse, and send a quick text to Chan, letting him know that I'm gonna be a little late before deciding to scroll a little bit through Instagram, as I wait. 

A light knock on my window makes me jump, almost causing me a heart attack. My eyes meet a young woman, with long dark hair and big brown eyes. She offers me an apologetic smile as I roll my window down.

"I'm so sorry," She immediately apologizes. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"No, it's okay" I brush her off. "do you need anything?"

"Oh, no, no. I just noticed Minho's car as I was coming home." She tugs a piece of her behind her ear.

The mention of his name shakes me but I try not to let my curiosity show, still I feel it eating me inside. "Um," I laugh awkwardly. "He's inside his friend's house but he'll be back any minute now. "

The girl looks behind her, at the house, and offers me a smile. "That's my house." She says.

"Oh," My stomach drops. "Um,excuse me but how do you know him?" I hesitantly ask, afraid of the answer. 

Her smile grows. "Oh, I'm his sister."

I freeze, my eyes going wide."His sister?" Oh my god. "Mia right?"

"Yes." She giggles and I take her in once again, now noticing the little similarities. The big eyes, and bright smile.

"Oh, god." I open the car door, feeling the need to greet her properly. "Nice to meet you." I shake her hand. "I'm Y/n."

"I should have guessed that he got himself a girlfriend." She studies me. "That explains his sudden mood lift."

I blush. "Oh no, no, I'm not his-"

"Mia." 

Both of our heads snap to the now open door, seeing Minho standing in the doorway. Our eyes meet and I can see his face hardening, his eyes moving between me and his sister. My blood runs cold at his expression, knowing what's coming.

"Min, hi." His sister warmly smiles at him. 

But before he has a chance to say anything, a little kid appears, squeezing his way through Minho's legs slightly open legs. "Mommy!" He yells and runs towards us.

Mia drops to the floor. "Hi baby, come here." She takes the giggling, little boy in her arms, lifting him off the ground as I stand completely frozen next to them but not as frozen as Minho. 

He's a statue. As still as I've ever seen him before and for once his face doesn't hold an inch of confidence. It holds something I've never seen from him; fear. Uncertainty and hesitance. 

My eyes move from the woman and the child to him many times, my brain catching up. The scene that plays in front of me is the first hit, the first punch in the stomach. 

"I met your girlfriend." Mia nods my way with the biggest smile, a smile that Minho doesn't return, instead, he flashes her a look.

"She's not my girlfriend." He says, and that was the second hit and most brutal one like it always is with him. His words cut like knives, and this time is no different. Actually this time, it hurts more.

My shoulders drop, my whole face unable to maintain a somewhat happily natural expression, as I stand without having anything to say. 

"Oh." I feel his sister's eyes on me, and I don't have to look to know the sympathy that they hold.

"She's just a friend." He goes on, adding as if his previous words weren't enough, and the thought that he might be doing it on purpose crosses my mind. There's no way that he doesn't realize how much he's hurting me right now, but then again I feel like that's how we always end up. 

"I dropped your things, " He points towards the door. "So we're just gonna go."

He walks up to his sister, planting a lazy kiss on the side of her head before ruffling the small boy's hair. 

"Bye Uncle Minho." The boy says with the sweetest little smile. 

Minho smiles back softly. "Bye, kiddo." And when he looks away from them, the softness is gone. 

"Drive safely," Mia says back as she makes her way towards the door. "And  Y/n, it was lovely meeting you."

I force myself to find my voice. "You too."

When the door closes, and we are alone, Minho makes a move my way, a step with his hand lifted, yet his eyes are looking anywhere but mine. I take a step back, my chest heavier by the second, the look on his face and his words awakening anger and pain inside me.

"Just get in the car." His gaze meets mine, and I see nothing. His eyes, blank and hard.

I shake my head, arms crossed. "Fuck you." I scoff.

I walk past him, my feet moving fast wanting nothing but to get as far away from his as possible.

"Y/n!" He yells my name but not in a way that will make me stop, not in the way I want him to. I feel his grip on my elbow before he spins me around to face him.

I push at his chest with all the force I can master. "Don't fucking touch me."

"Just get in the car, I'll explain-"

"No," I cut him off. "There's nothing to explain. I'm tired." I let my arms drop and slam against the side of my thighs. "I'm tired of your games, I'm tired of going back and forth and I'm tired of your lies." 

"I've never lied to you." His face and voice drop. "I've always been real with you. I just-"

"Just what?" I say drowning in frustration. "Just wanna use me when you can and when we're around others to treat me like shit?" My fear of looking pathetic doesn't stop me cause right now I don't care if he realizes just how much I want him, all I care about is the fact that he doesn't want me in the same way.

"A friend?" I get into his face but he doesn't move he simply clenches his jaw, his eyes hardening. "My breath was yours the minute I laid eyes on you?" I quote his words from earlier that made my heart melt, in the most mocking way I can. "Yeah, I'm guessing we're really good friends huh?" I push at his chest again. Right now I'm seeing red, feeling pure rage at how hurt I allowed myself to get by him once again.

His face turns to the right, the back of his index finger brushing the tip of his nose as his tongue pokes the inside of his mouth repeatably. He bounces back, nevertheless, coming back in my face. 

"If you could just let me explain for a second and stop being so fucking aggressive-"

"I don't wanna hear anything from you." I laugh. 

"I don't give a fuck what you want." He spits back. 

"Clearly! And that's the problem."

His head falls back. "You're overreacting."

My eyes narrow, hands curling into fists in front of my face. "Dude, are you being serious right now?!" My hands bury themselves in my hair as a frustrated laugh escapes me. "I can't do this, I really can't."

His palms come together, touching his mouth and nose, and closes his eyes, a visible effort to contain his anger. "Y/n, please listen to me."

"I don't want to. " I shake my head. "I wanna go home, I don't wanna be around you anymore, I can't even look at you right now. Actually, I don't feel like being around ever again. " I say, knowing it's a lie, yet the words leave my mouth, my anger leading them.

His shoulders drop. "You don't mean that."

"I do." I spit, my eyes watering. "You hurt me! It's all you ever do! You give me a moment of happiness, a few beautiful words and then you rip me apart." 

I do gain a small amount of satisfaction from the way his face shifts, how his eyes are getting glossy and moving everywhere around my face, desperately. 

"Baby-" He reaches for me but I hold my hands up, stopping him. The nickname hurts.

 I'm unable to stop the tears now, my throat tight. "I'm leaving. I'm walking home and don't you dare follow me. For once, respect me and listen."

I don't look at him before I turn around to grab my stuff from his car, cause I know that the sight will be painful enough to make me stay, to let him explain and sweet-talk his way through me but I'm done getting hurt. I walk away from him and he does nothing to stop me.

I walk and I walk, letting the tears fall in silence, coating my face and neck. I welcome the pain and the feeling of losing him again as if he was ever mine to begin with and allow myself to cry for him just for a little while. The thing that hurts the most is that; I knew. I know Minho, I know how complicated he is, and how he goes back and forth with his emotions yet I still let myself fall. I like him. God, I want him so much it hurts but how long will I allow myself to be there for someone who hasn't figured out what they want?

A car slowly stops next to me as I keep walking.

Hyunjin's eyes meet mine, and he reaches over to the passenger's seat to open the door. "Get in."

I do without thinking about it.

"How did you find me?" I cross my arms, aware that my face is still wet from the tears so I keep my head low.

He glances at me swiftly as he drives, his face more clouded than ever before. "He called me and told me that you left and that you're walking back home. So I checked your location and came."

We stop at a red light, and his heavy sight fills the air.

"Did you tell Chan?" I mumble.

"No." He turns to me, but I don't lift my eyes, I keep them glued to my knees, tears still escaping the corners of them, silently. "You know that he would kill him, especially if he found out how hard you're crying over him right now." He brushes the side of my hair away from my face, tugging them behind my ear. I must look like a fucking panda right now, and a new wave of tears almost reaches me over the hours I spend doing my makeup just for him to ruin it within a few minutes.

I rub my cheeks with my palms, brushing the tears off, and take a breath. "I'm sorry."

"I hate seeing you cry." He says under his breath. "And maybe I should tell Chan, just to see Minho get a good beating."

"Hyunjin!"

"What?" He lifts his shoulders, hands still on the wheel. "He deserves it. Look, Minho is my friend and I obviously love the guy but I'm done watching you get heartbroken over dudes that don't deserve you."

"Maybe I'm the problem." I whisper but he catches it.

"Don't say that." He answers sharply. "Please don't say that. I can't stand the fact that he's making you think this way about yourself."

I wish I could see myself the way my friends see me, but I can't. Cause in my eyes, I'm always the problem. In my eyes, I'm never enough and I'm always at fault. And deep down I know that the only reason why everyone sees me as someone that deserves their love and protection is because they don't know everything about me. And I made sure of that. I never wanted anyone to know what I've done in the past or anything about my childhood cause then everyone would see me, exactly how I see myself.

"I like him." I sob.

"I know babe." His hand gently touches my knee.

"I feel like he's the only one that sees me, the only person that can truly understand me."

His expression twitches. "Okay, ouch! That's bullshit. I see you." His tone is playfully offended. "And I understand you."

It's true, he does. All of them do. But not like him. 

"I know you do." I touch his hand. "But with him, it felt, different. I've never felt a connection like that before." I lay my emotions open for him.

He sighs again, the type of sigh that makes me want to break down again. 

"Look Minho is," He's searching for the right words. "He's a lot to deal with, he's complicated. And even though he's an amazing person and a really giving and loyal friend, being in a relationship is completely different."

"What do you mean?" I look at him confused. 

"I mean that he cares about you Y/n." His fingers drum on the wheel. "A lot, like a lot lot." He chuckles. "But he has his own issues to deal with, and the fact that  he can't be with you exactly how you want him to or need him to doesn't mean he doesn't want to."

I give him a sideways glance, his words surprising me. "How do you know all this? I thought that you and Minho weren't that close."

"Well, first of all, it's common sense and I'm a pretty intellectual human being." He smirks, earning a light push on his shoulder by me. "Second, Minho loves me. He likes to act like I annoy the shit out of him around others but I know that I'm secretly his favorite. We've gotten pretty close despite the fact that we bicker about every little thing." He shrugs. 

"Ugh!" I groan. "Why can't he act like a normal human being? I'm tired of chasing him!"

"Then don't! Let him chase you this time."

"He won't." I shake my head. Chasing me would mean that he cares enough and it's like he has this fear of showing any type of emotion. He never shows me anything unless I push him, bring him to his limits.

"Oh, trust me," Hyunjin's lips turn into a small knowing smile. "He will. Now forget about him and focus on the severely beaten baby Felix that's waiting for you in his room to cuddle."

My eyes go wide, realizing I have completely forgotten about them. "Oh my god! Drive faster!"

.

.

.

I've missed this. Being squeezed between Hyunjin and Felix, cuddling under the warm sheets as the daylight creeps into the room through the half-closed curtains. I don't wanna move an inch, I don't wanna face reality or talk about everything that happened last night. I just wanna stay here, my head resting on Hyunjin's chest while Felix is curled behind me, his limps launching on me like a koala bear, both of them lightly snoring. 

Hyunjin agreed to not tell Chan anything but it wasn't hard for him to realize that something happened when he saw my face the minute we walked through the door, he still said nothing though. We didn't talk much about what happened, we hang out a bit and then we went straight to bed, the events of the night too heavy so all of us.

"Rise and shine kids!" Chan's voice pulls me out of my slumber, and I slowly open my eyes. He pulls the curtains fully open earning a series of groans from both Hyunjin and Felix. Felix buries himself deeper into the covers, his body still glued to mine while Hyunjin unwraps one arm from around me and places his forearm over his eyes. 

"It's time to get up." Chan walks closer to the bed, a lazy smile plastered on his face.

I stretch my arms, gently pulling myself out of their grips in order to lift myself into a seating position.

"I missed this sight." Chan admires us with his arms crossed. "You kids sleeping together."

"Stop talking like a father." I rub my eyes, trying to wake up a bit. "I babysit you more than you do."

"That's not true," His smile grows. "I'm the dad and Emma is the mom, everyone knows that." He shrugs. "Ah, it's hard being a dad, especially now that I have 5 more kids."

"So should we call you daddy from now on?" Hyunjin's raspy morning voice comes from between the pillows, his eyes still closed. 

"I mean, if the shoe fits..." Chan trails off, with a smirk. 

I reach for the nearest pillow and throw it at him. 

He easily avoids it, chucking. "Get up and come down for breakfast. It's Christmas." He says already out of the door.

Holy shit, he's right. With everything that's been happening, the fact that today is Christmas Day totally slipped my mind. A wave of excitement and joy runs through me, and it brings a small smile to my lips. It's Christmas. I make a move to lift my body, but Felix's hand, flat against my stomach stops me.

"5 more minutes." He mumbles, still half asleep. His morning voice is something I'll probably never get used to no matter how many times we sleep together. 

"Noooo!" I groan, laughing. "Come on, it's Christmas!" 

I have to fight my way out of the bed, but the minute I'm on my feet I ran to the bathroom, to quickly wash my face and brush my teeth. I look at myself in the mirror a bit longer, notching the small red marks across my neck. His marks. And the feeling of his lips on my neck, his hands on me, his words, everything came rushing back. I shake my head, in attempt to shake him off, but it's impossible. He's all I think about, I feel like he's everywhere, and honestly, I don't know when it got to this point. I don't know if I wanna talk to him after last night, the look on his face and his words are still fresh, open wounds. A part of me believes that if I don't make the move to talk he will simply ignore me like he always does, but after last night and especially after my talk with Hyunjin, I will not let myself make the first move. Even though I want to, despite how his words and actions last night hurt me. I wanna see him try, for once. Maybe he will, maybe not. Still, I'm done running after him, hoping. 

I make my way down the stairs, excitement filling my veins but my feet slow down when I hear voices coming from the living room. I turn slowly to the right, careful not to be head.

Chan stands at the half-open door, only his back visible to me. "I told you she's sleeping."

"Look, I just really need to talk to her."

Minho. 

His voice makes my breath hitch, my heart suddenly heavy in my chest. I try to move closer, in order to sneak a peek at him.

"Minho, please just go. I don't know what happened but I know that she needs space." Chan insists.

"No," Minho takes a step forward. "She needs to listen to me."

The muscles on Chan's back tighten. "I told you to be careful." His voice is steady and low. "She's my best friend and you have no idea how protective I am over her." 

Minho stares at him just as hard, both of their bodies still as a statue. "Chan.."

"Don't make me step in between you two, 'cause for her I will," Chan warns him, his tone, unlike anything I've heard before from him. "You can be around her, you can like her, you can even love her if you want, but you don't get to break her heart. Cause then things will get complicated. You guys are the most important thing in my life, but she's family to me."

Chan's words make me warm. Even though we both know what we mean to each other, it's not often that I hear him express it in such words. Since my brother died, there's been this hole inside me, a void that nothing could fill. Or so I thought. When Chan came into my life everything changed. We became so close, so fast that I didn't even realize that he had silently filled that hole inside me. We always say that I saved him because my family took him in in a way, but I think it's the other way around. Chan's the reason that I'm where I am today.

"Please don't cross the line." He adds.

Minho's head stands low, his hair messy, falling into his eyes. "I don't wanna hurt her." His tone is gentle, sad. And I can't help but feel the same, his words tugging my heart. I wanna run to the door and wrap myself around him but I stay rooted, not letting myself go down that road again.

"Just.." Chan trails off. "Give her space, yeah? Just go home, rest, and come back for the Christmas dinner." 

Minho looks tired, his eyes drained from the usual hint of life they hold with bags underneath them. Chan pats his shoulder, but it takes one look from Minho to pull him into a hug. 

"Just please sleep and eat, don't make me worry about you too." Chan whispers against him.

The scene in front of me looks so vulnerable and personal that I begin to feel like I shouldn't be here, watching them. I force myself to step back, soundlessly jogging up the stairs until I hear the front door close. I wait for a moment, watching as Chan walks towards the kitchen before I do the same. 

His head snaps to me as I enter. "Good morning princess."

"Good morning." I smile at him lazily. I lean into the counter, observing how he flips the last of the massive golden pancakes and stacks them on top of the rest. It's my first time spending Christmas with them, usually, I chose to spend the holidays with my mum but I'm glad I'm here.

"What?" He chuckles, noticing my staring. He places the pancakes in the middle of the counter, next to a variety of toppings, like Nutella, maple syrup, and many fruits. There's also fresh coffee, juice, and 2 different cereal placed on the counter along with 4 plates and glasses. 

"Nothing," I shake my head. "I'm just happy to be spending Christmas with you guys."

His smile is soft as he reaches me. "I'm happy too."

I let my eyes study him, his injuries darker in the light of day. It feels like a punch in the stomach. 

He notices the way I look at him. "It's okay." He says gently. 

"It's not Chan," I bite my lip. "It's really not."

He tilts his head, his eyes soft and big staring at me and when my own eyes start to fill with tears he pulls me to his chest. "Come here." 

His arms are one of the few places I feel truly safe. Everything about him brings me comfort and calms me down. 

"It's gonna be okay, yeah? I promise." His hands brush my hair. "I'll take care of everything."

Oh, how I wish I could believe him.

[your-favorite-pirate]

Kitten (Owner!Minho and kitten gn!reader,fluff)

CHAPTER ONE

Minho lies awake in his bed, debating whether he should get ice cream. It was 11pm but his craving won in the end and he went to the convenience store a few minutes away from his house. On his walk back he heard a small meow and his cat lover's heart needed to find the source of the meow. As he walked around the area trying to find it he saw a bag move along with a weak meow coming from inside of it. Minho opened the bag to find a tiny kitten covered in gunk. He took the kitten home immediately and gently washed the kitten.

"Oh, poor baby," he cooed as the kitten snuggled up to him. He finished washing the kitten and revealed its pretty white fur. “You’re gorgeous baby do you have a name?" he said and dried the kitten . He gave his new baby some food and water and thought about a name for them.

“I think you look like a Y/N” he declared as the kitten curled up on his lap kneading his sweatpants and purring. “Yeah, you’re definitely a Y/N my little cutie." He kissed the purring kitten's head before drifting off into a peaceful sleep.  

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

First fic uploaded

sorry if it's bad

[stayinzencity]

heroine’s manual S1 E3

GENRE: Romcom, Drama | love triangles, childhood friends, high school au | INSPIRED BY: Heroine Shikkaku (shoujo manga) | LENGTH: ~1.4K | RATING: Teen | WARNINGS: mentions of food, eating | PAIRINGS: Minho x MC (Reader), Minho x OC (Heather) | TAGLIST: @linoscence @elizabeth11moreno  (ask to be added) | A/N: this chapter finally came out of the drafts after years thanks to @jisungsdaydreamer (and me accidentally posting part 5 first oops)

♡ previous episode 

♡ return to main

THREE. Even if he rejects me, I won't give up so easily and allow someone else to steal my spot.

Inviting Heather to hang out is a mistake. Having your friends around doesn't make you feel any less of a third wheel. It’s Heather who’s supposed to be the odd one out amongst your group, yet somehow it feels like the rest of you are the ones intruding. You can't bear to witness the shy glances and gentle smiles Minho and Heather exchange.

You're trying to come up with an excuse to break them apart without being the bad guy, when a crash comes to your rescue.

"Ah. My bad," Jisung apologizes, looking down at the glass he'd accidently knocked over. He'd been sitting next to Heather, and while the glass was fortunately intact, water had spilled onto Heather's lap. 

"Looks like you’re the victim of Jisung's idiocy today." Hyunjin hands her napkins, attempting to ease her through the awkwardness with his charming smile. He shoots Jisung a withering glare, getting a sheepish look and shrug in reply.  

"I guess I should get going," Heather says. She rises from her seat in a hurry, but a hand over hers gives her a reason to wait. 

Hyunjin.

Minho's expression is closer to amusement than jealousy, watching as his friend calls his girlfriend - by her actual name, not the nickname you've given her.

Maybe Hyunjin's crush hasn't disappeared yet. If he and Heather get together, then Minho would be yours again. Everything would fall perfectly in place.

"We don't live that far from each other. I'll take you home." Hyunjin pauses, turning to Minho who's sneaking cake onto Jisung's plate. "If that's fine with your boyfriend?"

"Whatever she wants," Minho says with a shrug. He doesn't seem to be worried about Hyunjin stealing away his girlfriend, which boosts your confidence in your own chances with him. 

"Yeah," you enthusiastically agree, nodding your head. "Hyunjin's a nice guy. Have a wonderful evening!"

Hyunjin narrows his eyes, scowling at you, instead of being grateful that you're helping him out. One day, he'll figure it out, and thank you.

You lean close to her so that only she - and Hyunjin, perhaps - can hear. "You might even fall for him instead of Minho."

Hyunjin scoffs at your words with an exaggerated eyeroll and drags Heather out the door before you can say anything else.

Seungmin leaves soon after them, muttering something about an assignment that you don't really bother paying attention to.

And then it's just Minho, Jisung and you.

"We should head home too," Minho says. He gets up from the table and grabs his jacket from the back of the chair. "It's movie night."

"Ah, right." Jisung sends you a wink, starting the next phase of your plan to set your story on track. "I've got some stuff I need to work on, so I'll have to trust you two to keep our tradition alive even if it’s not the same without me."

And then it was just Minho and you.

It's usually easy to forget Minho's girlfriends exist when they're not around. Often they fade into the background even when they are around.

Yet you find yourself alone with Minho, head in his lap, too distracted to actually watch the show that's playing on the TV. Too much on your mind to even enjoy this moment.

Minho's texting someone, wearing a smile as soft as the one he usually gives you before he wraps you in a hug. 

The someone in question must be Heather. After all, who else could it be? The only real rival you've ever had when it came to Minho's affection and attention is Heather, right?

If there's no struggle, then it won't feel as special when you finally end up together. Heather isn't the heroine. That title belongs to you. You're the one that's always been with Minho. No one else knows him like you do- well, maybe Jisung does. That's a different story though.

If you're the heroine, then why do you feel like you're in second place? Are you falling into a background role in your own story? Could it be you're simply a side character in this tale?

Minho's fingers run through your hair, breaking you out of your thoughts. 

You're the one here with him, not Heather. You're the heroine, not her. There's still hope. 

“I like you,” you blurt. It's far from the confession you had planned, especially since you weren't even the one who was supposed to be saying the words first. Sometimes you need to improvise to get the perfect scenes, so it's ok. “I like you so much.”

Minho’s hand stops stroking your hair. He doesn’t take it away, so you don’t attempt to sit up. You want to be close to him, for as long as you can. 

Any moment now, he'll admit his feelings for you and you'll be the one beside him instead of Heather. 

You know that, but if somehow these are the last moments you’ll have with him, you want to remember them being pleasant. Besides, you don’t exactly want to look at his face right now. The aftermath of a confession is more mortifying than you imagined, especially when you haven't gotten an answer in return. 

“I know,” he says. 

And that’s it. He doesn't say anything else. And you don't have the courage to ask what your words meant to him. 

The couple on screen breaks up and eventually makes up, but you don't even remember their names anymore. Tears fall from your eyes and you wipe them away. 

"I can't watch this anymore," you manage to whisper. It's not the drama that has you crying. You know it, and you know Minho probably does too. "I'll head home."

Minho doesn't try to stop you as you leave. As tempting as it is to turn back, you're too afraid that Minho's eyes won't be watching you.

Seungmin once explained some physics cat theory. Put a cat in a box with poison, and it could be both alive or dead as long you don't open it. If you don't check, the cat might still be alive. Something like that.

In your imagination, Minho is woefully watching as you walk away.

After the confession, it's a little hard. Minho isn't actively avoiding you, except he kind of is. He has the perfect excuses, plus the universe seems to be on his side. It's natural for the hero of the story to have exceptional luck. 

As the heroine, you don't seem to have the same advantage. If anything, there's just been obstacles to your perfect ending. The biggest one turning out to be Minho himself.

You thought you didn't have to do anything and everything would fall into place by itself. Then when you took a chance and confessed, you were turned down. But even if he doesn't feel the same way now, you can't give up yet. It hurt when you realized you weren't on the same page as him, but there's still time for him to catch up, right? 

You run into him after class, and he has to catch you before you stumble to the floor. It's a scene straight out of the kind of anime you love to watch. A sign for you to take another chance, except Minho speaks before you can. 

"No."

You haven't even said a word, and you’ve already been shot down. An arrow through your heart, but it seems cupid isn't on your side.

Are you that obvious? Could Minho read minds? Does he really not like you?

"What? I didn't even ask-"

"I won't go out with you."

Ah. Well. Minho hasn't told you that he doesn't like you, though you aren't sure if you could handle hearing those words straight from him. 

"That wasn't what I was going to say," you lie. Your voice is strained, and you can't meet his eyes, so maybe it's not believable. But you can't admit the truth, can you? "I wanted to ask if you had any movie recommendations." 

Minho raises an eyebrow. He's not fooled. Still he goes along with it and makes some suggestions. Not that you’re really paying attention to his words as much as how his voice sounds. 

Minho. It's always been Minho. 

And you were the constant in his life, at least until Heather showed up.

It's hard to admit that she might have stolen the role that was meant for you, but you can't move ahead without accepting that. 

Turns out Minho isn't just on a different page. The title of the book doesn't match either.

You are lost, clueless of what lies ahead. There's one thing you're certain of though.

Even if you’re disqualified as a heroine, your only hero is Minho. 

♡ season one guide

♡ next episode

♡ please leave a comment, reblog with tags or send an ask to let me know what you think!!

© 2024, stayinzencity

[bangtanskz17]

SKZ Bf Changbin! random texts

₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊ a combination of texts between you and bf! Changbin ₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊

WARNINGS — fluff, heavy angst-ish I guess?? (they make up) hurt/comfort, dw oc and binnie love eachother lol

PAIRINGS — fem oc x bf! changbin

⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡ this is a bit more angsty than my usual sorry, I didn't mean for it to be oops

₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊ next day ₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊

[faerybin]

「Lee Minho」 ♤

» So here you'll find all of my favorite Minho fanfics

» For the sake of not spamming the authors, I won't tag them in my post anymore

» Hope you will enjoy and let me know if one of the links doesn't work *⁠.⁠✧

DRABBLES *⁠.⁠✧

[Untitled] ↴

[0.3k] — fluff, suggestive

Cotton Candy ↴

[0.3k] — fluff

Routine ↴

[0.5k] — fluff

Another year with you ↴

[0.5k] — fluff, established relationship

Ticklish ↴

[0.7k] — fluff

Mine ↴

[0.7k] — pre-established relationship, fluff

[Untitled 4] ↴

[0.8k] — fluff, comfort

Birthday boy ↴

[0.8k] — fluff

Kiss me (like you wanna be loved) ↴

[1.4k] — established relationship, fluff, suggestive

I miss you ↴

[2.5k] — smut, slight angst, fluff

ONESHOTS *⁠.⁠✧

Café cuddles ↴

[2k] — a lot of fluff

Conversations with Minho ↴

[2.3k] — fluff, hurt/comfort

Brother's best friend ↴

[2.4k] — smut

Kingdom come ↴

[3k] — slight angst, smut, prince!minho x maid!reader, royalty!au

A chance ↴

[3k] — slow burn, angst (if you squint), hurt/comfort, fluff

Black magic ↴

[3.3k] — warlock!minho, witch!reader, fluff

Bets and situations ↴ ♤

[3.4k] — rivals to lovers, street racing, smut

Homerun ↴

[3.8k] — fluff, friends to lovers au, high school au, sports au (baseball player minho!!)

Make a wish ↴

[3.9k] — smut, fluff, established relationship

Strawberries ↴

[4.3k] — tattoo artist au, fluff

Dirty Thoughts ↴

[4.7k] — smut, fluff, friends to lovers

Jealousy, jealousy ↴

[4.9k] — college au, coffee shop au, strangers to lovers

Of poison love and never agains ↴

[6k] — fluff, angst, royal au, enemies-to-lovers

Winner ↴

[6.6k] — fluff, slight angst

Spiderweb ↴ ♡

[7.4k] — smut, angst, roommates to lovers, brothers best friend!au

Glowing ↴ ♤

Backstage ↴

[8.2k] — best friend’s brother!minho, smut

Laundry ↴ ♤

[8.2k] — smut, established relationship, angst, fluff

[8.6k] — established relationship, mc!lee know, fluff, smut

TKO ↴

[9k] — boxer!au, neighbours!au, smut, tsundere/brat tamer!minho

Between the lines ↴

[9.7k] — retro!high school au, slow burn, slight enemies-to-lovers shenanigans

Green Flames ↴

[9.8k] — little angsty, slowburn, fluff, hogwarts au, frenemies to lovers

Ritual ↴

[11.3k] — soulmates!, historical!au, smut, angst, fluff

Kiss me more ↴ ♡

[13.2k] — fluff, smut, brother's best friend!au

Destiny's Design ↴

[16.4k] — enemies to lovers, strangers to lovers, arranged marriage!au, royal!au

The enemies to lovers project ↴ ♡

[18k] — enemies to lovers, college au, slight angst, fluff

Conflict, conceal, confess ↴

[18.1k] — college au, enemies to lovers, smut

Invisible thread ↴

[20k] — university au, academic rivals to lovers, slow burn, fluff, angst

1LOVEU2! ↴ ♡

[20k+] — smut, dance partners!au, virgin!reader, fuckboy!minho, corruption!au

Pas de bourrée ↴

[24k] — enemies to lovers, angst, smut, dancer au

Lost in translation ↴ ♡

[26.5k] — smut, fluff, angst

Otherworldly ↴ ♡

[29.2k] — smut, s2l, alien!au

Bunny ↴

⇉ Part 2

[12.7k] Two-shots — smut, angst, fluff, strangers to lovers, neighbours!au

When the rain stops ↴

Part 2 ⇉ Where the storm looms

[22.8k] Two-shots — smut, angst, fluff

SERIES *⁠.⁠✧

Nightmare ↴

[21.8k+] [Completed] — fake dating!au, college!au, roommates!au, best-friends to lovers!au, angst, fluff, smut

The experience project ↴ ♤

[47k+] [Completed] — enemies to lovers, college au, smut, angst, fluff

Consort ↴

[6/?] [59.3k] [On going] — enemies to lovers, historical au, arranged marriage!au, smut, slow burn

Sea may rise, sky may fall ↴ ♤

[11/11] [108k] [Completed] — smut, angst, pirate!au, feat. Jisung

New fanfics ♤

Personal favorites ♡

Last updated : 06/11/2024

[sluttywonwoo]

instead of you [part twenty-six] || l.mh

pairing: [best friend’s brother] lee minho x college!reader ft. han jisung

summary: you didn’t expect to spend your summer pretending to be your best friend’s girlfriend- then again, you didn’t expect to fall for your best friend’s brother, either. 

warnings: swearing, angst, smut (mdni)

word count: 5.1k

a/n: revamped my tom holland series from my main blog ( @wazzupmrstark ) to try and motivate myself to finish it!!

series masterlist | early access to the next chapter on ko-fi

additional smut warnings: oral (f receiving), protected sex, multiple orgasms

The silence that followed your admission was excruciating. You wished you knew what Minho was thinking. He was impossible to read, aside from the evident anger written all over his face. His body language didn’t give much away either. He was closed off, arms folded across his chest, chin raised just slightly. 

“So who are you then?” he demanded, tone even despite being the exact opposite mere moments ago. 

“What?”

“Who are you? Are you just some girl that Jisung is using?”

“What the fuck, no!”

“Why are you acting like that’s some outrageous possibility? I just found out you’ve been lying to everyone all summer!”

“I’ve been Jisung’s best friend for like four years now, I’m all over his Instagram! Felix came to visit us and we all hung out, there are pictures of that too. I can’t believe you’d think I’m some random person!”

“You’ll have to forgive me for not thinking completely rationally right now!” he spat. “Why the hell would Jisung lie about- why would he say he had a girlfriend if he didn’t?”

“It’s a long story,” you mumbled with a sigh. “But we really don’t have time to get into that right now. I came up here because I was supposed to bring you back to the room.”

Minho made a face. “What, why?”

“Your cousins called.”

The shift in his demeanor was immediate. He visibly perked up, but only briefly, before seeming to remember the conversation he was having. “Jeongin and Yoon?”

“Yeah. Everyone else is on FaceTime with them right now. I told everyone I’d come to get you so that none of them would have to miss out on talking to him,” you explained. “So we should probably get going because I don’t know how long he has to chat.”

“Fine,” Minho surrendered easily, “but we’re not done talking about this.”

“Yeah, yeah I know,” you sighed again, still feeling nauseous. With everything that had already happened, you knew there was no way that this could end well. But now, now that one person knew it was all a lie, you were fucked. “Just… don’t tell anyone, please?”

He pursed his lips but nodded. “You sure have a lot of secrets to keep track of, don’t you?”

It was meant to sting, and it did, but you didn’t let him see the crack in the glass. 

“I could say the same for you.”

-

You slipped into your room as soon as you got back to the penthouse, not wanting to face any of the other Hans, especially not your best friend. You collapsed onto the bed with a muffled scream into your pillow. 

You expected yourself to start crying, but the tears didn’t come. They wouldn’t come. The initial panic had been replaced with numbness. Apathy personified, you could feel it spreading from your heart out through your veins, creating a tingling sensation that reached the very tips of your fingers. 

You had to tell Jisung, right? He’d understand… probably. You hadn’t told Minho. He figured it out on his own. Yeah, you should tell Jisung and then you could also come clean about… everything else. Maybe. But maybe you could also take it to your grave since it seemed like any possibility of you and Minho becoming an item, whatever that implied, was out of the question now. You knew he didn’t want anything to do with you anymore. Not after tonight. You couldn’t erase his look of betrayal from your mind no matter how hard you tried. 

Just how many people were you hurting by merely being on this trip? There was no way to know for sure, not that knowing would make you feel any less guilty. 

Maybe it was better not to tell Jisung. Maybe you could pretend like everything was fine, and then it would be. But that was what had gotten you in trouble in the first place. 

You hadn’t realized you had fallen asleep until you woke up with a jolt some hours later. The room was dark. The lamp had been switched off and the blinds were shut. Jisung was snoring softly beside you. He was tucked under the covers while you were still laying on top of them. 

You rolled over and felt for your phone, finding it underneath your pillow. You were surprised to see that you had missed a text from Minho. It was from an hour and a half ago and just said can you meet me in room 422? 

You weren’t sure if he would still be waiting there since it had been so long since he sent the message, but you responded with a tentative sure and quietly snuck out of your bedroom. You hoped Jisung wouldn’t wake up before you returned. Having to explain where you were or why you were there would only complicate things. You still hadn’t decided whether or not to tell him… anything. You needed more time to think things through. At least, that’s the excuse you told yourself. 

The fourth floor was eerily quiet, reminding you of how late it was. Stepping off the elevator into the hallway felt like a mistake, like you were trespassing on private property. Minho hadn’t replied to your text so you didn’t know if he was still awake, but you knocked at the door anyway. He answered after the second knock. 

“There you are,” he said and stepped aside to let you in. He seemed to have cooled down, which was a good sign, but there was still tension lingering between you. 

You slid by him, stopping in the entryway just past the door. The room he had summoned you to was just a plain hotel room. There was a queen-size bed in the middle of the room and a desk in the corner, but not much else. 

“You can sit wherever.”

You nodded in acknowledgment and perched yourself on the edge of the bed. Minho followed you but refrained from sitting, choosing to lean back against the dresser so that he could face you. 

“Why’d you want to meet me here?” you asked.

“I, uh, thought that talking in my room back at the apartment would look kind of weird if anyone saw us,” he explained awkwardly, “and the walls are thin too.”

“Alright, you have a point,” you admitted with a shaky exhale. “Whose room is this?”

“It’s mine. I went down to the lobby and booked it for the night.”

Oh to have a K-pop-sized disposable income.

“Oh, right. Should have thought of that.” You swallowed thickly, trying still to appear calm, cool, and collected. “Well, what did you want to talk about?”

You realized that Minho hadn’t mentioned wanting to talk in his text. You were just assuming. But given the events of the night, you felt that it was a pretty safe assumption to make. 

“I wanted to know why you and Jisung lied to everyone,” he took a brief pause before continuing, “and why I now have to lie to everyone too.”

You bit your tongue, stopping yourself before you could point out that he was already lying to everyone, and just nodded. 

“So the thing is, when he told your parents he had a girlfriend, he did have a girlfriend. They broke up, like, less than a week after he told them that and I guess he was too embarrassed to break the news because they were so excited for him and had already invited her on the trip. Jisung figured that maybe he’d have another girlfriend by the time he actually had to go on the trip, but when the end of the semester rolled around and he didn’t, I kind of filled the vacancy because he asked me to.”

“But why?” Minho pressed. “Why was it so important for him to be dating someone?”

“I don’t know, actually. He told me that it was to make your parents happy because they were always bugging him about his dating life, but I thought there might have been another reason that he just wasn’t telling me.”

Minho hummed thoughtfully. “Mom and dad are pretty nosy about our lives, but I don’t know why he would feel pressured to be in a relationship.”

“I think he felt like he had something to prove,” you said, choosing your words carefully. You knew how rocky Jisung’s relationship with his older brother was, at least from what he told you. You didn’t want to give Minho anything he could hold against him. “You’re not going to say anything to your parents or Felix, are you?”

“No,” he answered immediately and you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. “That’s his prerogative, I suppose. I don’t want to start anything between us- it’s not my place to say anything, really.”

“Thank you.”

He let his arms drop to his sides but didn’t move from where he was standing. “So, there’s really nothing going on between you and Jisung?”

“No, I swear.”

“Even after spending all this time together on the trip?”

“Nope, we spend all of our time together anyway.”

“So are you… friends with benefits?” he asked. 

“No. We’ve made out a few times, but it really just happens when we’re drunk. We never slept together.”

“But what about…” he trailed off, but you understood what he was talking about instantly.

“Oh, no! That was all fake. We just did that to sell it more, and sometimes to mess with you guys.”

“I knew there was no way he could be that good,” Minho whispered.  

You chuckled but came to your friend’s defense. “He seems to do pretty well for himself. Girls usually call him back after staying over so he must be doing something right.”

“I can’t believe it was fake,” Minho mumbled, mostly to himself. “Sorry, I’m still processing this.”

“Take your time.”

You leaned back on the palms of your hands, feeling a little more relaxed now that you knew he didn’t hate you. 

“Why didn’t you just tell me?” he asked finally, letting the mask fall the tiniest bit. “After I kissed you the first time? Or when you kissed me back? This whole time I’ve felt like such an asshole for- for everything that happened.”

“I thought about it,” you admitted, “but Jisung and I agreed that it would stay between us. I’m sorry.”

“I get why you didn’t. I just wish it could have been different.” 

“Me too,” you agreed.

Minho crossed over to the bed and sat down next to you. 

“I’m sorry I went through your stuff.”

You threw your head back laughing. You hadn’t expected him to say that. “It’s fine. Honestly, it’s a relief not to have to keep up the act around you anymore.”

“Oh yeah? And why’s that?” Minho raised an eyebrow and grinned, making you shy away from his gaze. 

You looked down at your lap. 

“Because it was exhausting! I don’t know how to act.” It was a half-truth, and you suspected that he knew it. 

“You had me fooled.”

You managed to look back up at him only to find him staring at your lips. This was not how you imagined this conversation going at all. 

“Maybe I should change career paths then,” you choked out. 

“Yeah, maybe.”

A few more beats of silence lapsed between you before Minho spoke again. 

“All of this time we could have been doing this,” he murmured gently. 

You scrunched your face up in confusion. “What’s ‘doing this’?”

 He leaned forward and bridged the gap between you by pressing his lips to yours to answer your question. His hand came up to your hair instinctively, muscle memory, and brushed it out of your face before cupping your jaw. You melted into him like you had done too many times before, letting him trace the curves of your face with his thumb like he was trying to memorize it. 

His palm was warm and you could feel the calluses on his hand against your cheek. You were the first to moan, any embarrassment long forgotten as you climbed onto his lap. 

Minho accommodated your weight easily, hands immediately coming down to grab your ass. He allowed you to push him down so that he was lying flat on the bed with you straddling his waist. 

Minho slipped his tongue into your mouth as the kiss intensified, teasing you with it. You whimpered when he pulled away, bottom lip jutting out into a pout. Minho just smirked and used the opportunity to flip you over so that he was on top. 

Then his lips were back on you, brushing against your jaw, your neck, your collarbone. As soon as you felt his teeth graze your skin you pushed his head back and gave him a look. It was his turn to pout. 

“You can’t leave marks, idiot.”

“Oh yeah, sorry,” he said apologetically, though the shit-eating grin on his face let you know that he didn’t mean it whatsoever. “Well, you can mark me up as much as you want.”

You rolled your eyes. “Lucky me.”

Minho ignored your comment and raised himself onto his hands, still hovering over you. He looked pretty, even in the dim, yellowy hotel room light. His lips were already a bit puffy, but he hadn’t even been kissing you for that long. You briefly wondered how they’d look after making out with your cunt, all swollen and glossy. You tried to squeeze your thighs together at the thought, legs closing around Minho’s hips instead. He seemed pleased at your eagerness and rewarded you with another kiss. 

“Can I take your shirt off?” he asked when he came up for air. You nodded. “Here, lift up a little.”

You did as he asked so that he could work the t-shirt over your head, laughing when he tossed it on the floor. 

“You weren’t wearing a bra?”

“I was about to go to sleep!”

He narrowed his eyes at you. “Likely story.”

“No, you’re right. I came here in my pajamas fully intending to seduce you.”

“Well, it worked.”

“Of course it did. Men are so easy.”

He shook his head, tongue poking his cheek. “You’re going to regret saying that.”

You cocked your head to the side, fully aware that Minho had the physical upper hand. “We’ll see.”

As soon as the words left your mouth Minho’s hands were on your boobs, effectively shutting you up. He circled a thumb around each of your nipples, smirking when you gasped and arched your back. 

“Barely even touching you and look how eager you are for me,” he mused. 

“T-take your shirt off too.” It was meant to be a command, but it sounded more like a plea. 

“What’s the magic word?”

“Fuck you.”

“Fine, since you asked so nicely.”

Minho reached behind his neck and yanked his t-shirt off, throwing it in the same general direction as he had thrown yours. You had seen Minho shirtless plenty of times before and you still couldn’t help but stare. His body looked like one of those statues you had seen in the Louvre, carved out of marble by one of the artists they named the Ninja Turtles after. 

You reached out to touch his chest, running your fingertips along his pale skin. 

“Can I take these off too?” Minho asked, playing with the hem of your sweats. He snapped the elastic band against your hip, making you flinch. 

“Yes, please get them off of me, it’s hot,” you whined.

You were left in just your underwear beneath him. You were usually pretty confident with sexual partners, but with Minho you felt exposed, vulnerable. You felt the urge to cover yourself, even though he was looking at you like you were a star amongst the cosmos. 

He repositioned himself lower in between your legs and before you could ask what he was doing, he pressed his tongue against your clothed cunt, licking a fat stripe between your folds.

You cried out in surprise, hips bucking into his face as a string of curses left your mouth. 

Minho raised his head, smiling sheepishly. “I’m sorry, I couldn’t help myself. I’ve been imagining what you taste like for weeks. I just had to know.”

“It felt good,” you assured him, silently begging him to continue. “Was it what you hoped it would be?”

“Better. Can I please keep going?”

“God, yes.”

He placed a hand on either one of your thighs to hold you down as he buried his head in between your legs again. He teased you with his tongue over your panties, finding your clit in an impressively short amount of time. You tangled your fingers in his hair, pushing his head against you. He groaned, his grip on your thighs tightening as you pulled his hair.

“Please, need more,” you whined. 

And Minho was all too willing to give you exactly that. Instead of taking the time to take your panties off, he just pulled them to the side so that he could have complete access to your pussy. He went back to work and you both moaned. His tongue was wet and warm and felt perfect on your clit. You frowned when he started moving lower, confused as to what he was doing until you felt his tongue working you open. No one had ever tongue-fucked you before and you thought you might cum from that alone. 

Minho paused again to catch his breath. “Fuck, I knew you were wet, but I didn’t expect you to be this wet,” he rasped out. 

“Sorry,” you hissed, cheeks warm with embarrassment.

“Who the fuck ever told you to apologize for being turned on?”

“N-no one.”

“Good, because it’s hot.”

You scoffed. 

“Lay back down,” Minho said, nodding at you to punctuate his point. 

You rolled your eyes at him but did as he said anyway. “You’re so bossy.”

“Do you want me to keep going or not?”

“Fine, fine. Sorry.”

“I fucking knew you were a brat,” he sneered. 

“What gave it away?” you asked sweetly. 

“Take a wild guess.”

You propped yourself up on your elbows again despite just being told to lie down. “And what are you going to do about it?”

Instead of answering, Minho hooked his arms under your thighs and pulled you to the edge of the bed, making you lose your balance and yelp in surprise. You watched his shoulder muscles flex as he used his strength to push your hips down, preventing you from squirming. The sight was enough to make you want to squeeze your thighs together, but of course, Minho was stopping you from doing just that. 

He pulled your panties off completely this time, apparently frustrated with the obstacle in his way. They joined the heap of clothes on the ground. You didn’t even need to look at them to know that they were ruined. 

His mouth was back on you before you could get another word in, causing any snarky remark you’d been about to make dissolve into a moan. It was a little sloppy at first. He had yet to fully regain his bearings, but dove in headfirst anyway. Kisses against the crux of your thigh, nips at your hip bones. Teasing and experimental. 

His touch didn’t have the practiced familiarity of a lover. Each movement was eager, exploratory. He was learning your body like he had all the time in the world, but you were growing impatient. 

Your hands flew to his hair again as he finally laved his tongue over your clit. You suppressed your moans this time, remembering what he had said about the neighbors. 

“Fuck, keep going,” you hissed, encouraging him to continue. “Please keep going.”

You could feel Minho smirking against your pussy, but you didn’t care. He could be as cocky as he wanted if he was going to make you feel this good. 

It didn’t take much to get you to the edge. It had been a while since you’d gotten laid, and you had been wanting Minho for God knows how long… you would usually be embarrassed, not want to give a man a bigger ego than he already had, but you had a feeling Minho was trying to get you to cum before fucking you and you wanted him inside of you as quickly as possible. If anything, you were doing him a favor. 

“C-close, Min. ‘M really close!”

You could barely make out the muffled “already?” that came from him between your legs, but you still rolled your eyes anyway, half-tempted to push his head away. 

He guided two of his fingers inside of you, giving you something to clench around as you came. The intention behind the action is what did it. He clearly cared about your pleasure which was rare to find in a partner, especially when said partner was a man. 

You came almost instantly, catching Minho off-guard as if “I’m close” hadn’t been warning enough. He must have taken it as an advanced notice rather than an immediate head’s up. He grunted in surprise as you bucked your hips up into his face, but recovered quickly, helping you ride out the orgasm until you relaxed back on the bed. 

He lifted his head finally, grinning like he’d just won the lottery, and sucked your arousal off of his fingers, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand shortly afterward.

“Good?” he asked. 

“Really good,” you managed to choke out. 

“You okay?”

“Yeah, take your pants off.”

Minho chuckled. “Should’ve known you’d only want me for my body.”

You pursed your lips but didn’t bother responding. You both knew that wasn’t true. Otherwise, why would you be risking everything just to fuck him? 

Minho pushed himself off of the bed and shimmied out of his pants. As good as he looked in the gray sweats, you knew he would look even better with them off. And you were right. Even though he was still wearing his briefs, you could see the outline of his dick much more prominently. It made your mouth water and you sat up and shifted onto your knees to return the favor he had just given you. 

Minho saw you reaching out for him but shook his head. 

“I need to feel you,” he said, voice strained. “If that’s okay. I already almost came in my pants just from eating you out, I won’t last.”

You raised your eyebrows. “Not many men would admit to that.”

“Not many men would admit to getting off on making their partner feel good? You’re right.” 

You watched as he picked his pants up off the floor and pulled a condom out of one of the pockets. 

“Oh now you have a condom?” you teased.

“Look, I usually have them on me, I just didn’t that night,” he exclaimed in defense, the thin foil packet between his teeth. He ripped it open and pulled the rubber out, only pausing when you spoke again. 

“You don’t keep them in your wallet, do you?”

“I do, but I change them out pretty often. Is that okay?” 

“That’s fine.”

With that settled, he slipped out of his underwear and rolled the condom on with ease. He joined you on the bed a moment later. You laid back and waited for Minho to position himself. 

“Wait-” you whispered suddenly, having been so in the moment that you had almost forgotten. “Are you clean?”

Minho let out a sigh of relief, probably having thought something was wrong. “Yeah, I got tested like two months ago.” 

“But the other night with that girl-”

“I didn’t sleep with her.”

“Oh. Why?”

“I mean, I fully intended to, if I’m being honest. But I just… couldn’t.”

“Couldn’t get it up?” 

“Something like that,” he sighed. “I probably should’ve asked this before going down on you, but you’re clean too, right?”

You nodded. “I get tested all the time and I haven’t had sex in a while.”

“That makes two of us.” 

You looked at him expectantly. “You may… continue.”

“I’m surprised that didn’t immediately make my dick soft.”

“Oh, give me a break. My brain is still fuzzy from cumming.”

He snorted. “You’re welcome.”

“I can’t believe that didn’t immediately make me dry up.”

“I’m allowed to be cocky!” he protested. “I made you cum in, what, a minute flat?”

“It took longer than a minute!”

“I don’t know about that. I think we should check the replay.”

“You’re such a dork.”

Minho rolled his eyes. “And that must really turn you on. ‘Cause last time I checked you were dripping onto the sheets.”

“I-” you had nothing. You squeezed your thighs around Minho’s waist, trying to coax him inside of you. “Just stick it in already!”

“Since you asked so nicely,” he repeated.

You held onto his arms as he pushed himself in, sighing in relief at the fullness. He wasn’t the biggest you’d ever had, but he was still sizable. You had to take a second to adjust to the stretch before he could start to move. He fit perfectly, at least that’s what it felt like. You were positive he could tell how much you liked his cock from the way you unconsciously clenched around him, but you couldn’t even bring yourself to care. If his ego inflated to the size of the moon after this, fuck it.

“Fuck, st-stop doing that,” Minho stuttered, pressing one of his hands against your hip to try and keep you still. 

“I’m not doing anything!”

“You’re, God, you’re squeezing me so tight,” he hissed. “If you keep clenching like that I’m gonna cum.”

“Oh sorry, I didn’t even realize.”

You took a deep breath and willed your body to relax. It had been so long since you’d been properly fucked and you didn’t want it to be over before it even started. 

“Are you good to keep going?” Minho asked once he’d regained some semblance of composure. 

“Yeah,” you breathed out. “Yeah, fuck please move.”

He leaned down to kiss you as he began to rock his hips into yours and you met him halfway. You could still taste yourself on his tongue, on his lips. He groaned into your mouth and nipped at your bottom lip when you pulled away. 

“You feel so fucking good, baby,” he confessed, voice raspy. 

Baby was new. And it made you whimper in response. 

“So goddamn tight. It’s like your pussy was made for me.”

Did he say this to every girl he fucked? Because it sounded like a line, but it was working like a charm on you. 

As if he realized he was rambling, he busied his mouth in other ways. He kissed your neck, careful not to leave marks, before moving down to the valley of your breasts where he continued his work. The way he lowered himself onto you pushed his cock in even deeper, something you didn’t think was possible. 

His lips were warm. They were so warm. Each kiss felt like you were touching the sun. You could feel the heat against your skin even as he moved away, pressing kisses elsewhere. 

“What’s got you smiling like that?” Minho asked. 

You hadn’t even realized that you had been smiling, or that he had stopped kissing you. He was going faster now too. You hadn’t noticed that either. You were far too gone, clearly.

“Feels good,” was as much as you could manage, but that seemed to satisfy Minho. 

“Yeah? Have I fucked you dumb already?” he cooed condescendingly. 

You nodded. “Feels sooo good. Feel so full.”

You’d be embarrassed by your barely-comprehensible sentences, but you didn’t have the capacity to feel anything other than pleasure in that moment. You doubted you’d even remember what you said in the morning. 

“You close again, baby?”

“Uh huh.”

“Fuck, me too. I’ll get you there, though. I’ll make you feel even better.”

He brought one of his hands down to your clit and used his thumb to rub somewhat uncoordinated circles on it. He was gentler than he had been before, like he knew you were still sensitive from cumming the first time. The added stimulation brought you back to the edge in record time and all you could do to alert Minho of what was happening was frantically grab his bicep and squeeze it repeatedly.

“Gonna cum? Go ahead, baby.”

Your entire body tensed as your second orgasm of the night washed over you. Minho fucked you through it again, announcing that he was cumming right as you started to come down. Watching his face scrunch up in pleasure as he came was almost enough to send you into a third orgasm. His eyes shut and his mouth fell open into an O shape as his hips faltered. He didn’t stop thrusting until he was certain he’d given you every last drop of his cum, choking out a string of curses followed by your name through gritted teeth. 

He collapsed on top of you seconds later, completely spent and still inside of you. 

“Fuck, that was good,” he panted. You nodded in agreement, wincing when you felt him pull out. “You okay?”

“Yeah, but I don’t think I can walk. My legs feel like jelly.”

“Would another orgasm help?”

“No,” you groaned. “I can’t take another one.”

“I was kidding. C’mon, let’s get you cleaned up and back to your room.”

“Nooo, I’m tired,” you whined. 

“I know, I know,” he said softly, “but you can’t sleep here. Unless you want Jisung to find out?”

“Fine,” you mumbled. Your eyes were closed, but you could hear him moving around the hotel room. “Just give me like five minutes to nap.”

“You know I can’t do that.” When you opened your eyes he was wearing pants again and standing beside the bed waiting for you. “You need to shower. And pee. A UTI in the middle of vacation would really suck.”

“I’ve had worse.”

“You’re impossible.”

“You knew that before sleeping with me.”

“Yeah, and I still did it anyway. Now, get up.”

“You’re so bossy,” you muttered under your breath, repeating the sentiment you had already voiced. Minho just chuckled and helped you to your feet.

“You seemed to like that earlier.”

“Yeah, when you were making me cum.”

“Well, I won’t be able to make you cum anymore if you contract an infection. So I have to be bossy or else you won’t listen.” 

“Or else you won’t listen,” you mocked. 

Minho grinned despite himself and shook his head at you. “We should’ve started doing this way sooner.”

hope y'all liked this one :) lmk what you think i always appreciate feedback!!

iou tags: @gimmeurtmi @phobia0325 @fwess @hipsdofangirl @galaxleeknow @urmomma0324 @bangmechanpls @102598s @farfromsugafanfic @ritzy-roo @dimpledsatan @bvselines @wonderfulshinee @imwithurmother @smollquokka @rosexjimin @skizzel @endzii23 @lady-lena @kwanisms @ch4nniebang @lilramennoodle @babyphotos0325 @dearalice @sojohns @mistlitmoonlight @yoontaethings @babebatter @mal-lunar-28 @shy-kisu @zerefdragn33l @downbadreading @sana-within-you @saquso @bunnispaces @reianagarcia @hyunehans @imtooyoungforthisshit @i8rsie @honeslykindahorny @214racha @hgema @chillllllli @vixensss @smhlino @feiyaa @borahae-reads @bigbearenergy @hoodiesandicedcoffee @darkacademic2512 @y00nzin0 @i8yul @shinypieceofgarbage @woozarts @just-a-little-delulu @djeniryuu @hbzzzbork000 @mimzibee @sofiaslayed @kangyounghyunhands @lexxxxs-things @baejinswrld @gaysontheprince @emogril @ngengngeng

add yourself to my taglist here!

[linos-kitten]

rn i'm working on my enemy!minho series (Unexpected Love) but i need help on the reason for why y/n and minho are enemies

i can't come up with any ideas so if you have an idea on why they are enemies, tell me asap !!

[hyunfilms]

blue side of the sky (lmh) | fourteen.

♡ spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: waking up after 3 months with no recollection of your past, your friends do what they can to help you remember. except, they omit an important piece to the puzzle - afraid you would remember the heartbreak and hurt all over again.

—pairing: lee know x f. reader

—genre: (18+) exes to lovers, bestfriends to lovers au | fluff, angst, smut

—word count: 4.4k

—chapter content/warnings: cussing, cuddles, small, sweet kisses, cute gestures of affection, whatever happens later in the chapter - it's really not what it looks like (aka minho means it), minsung heart to heart, flashback scenes - one that is cute, the other that is a bit more angry and full of emotion (some pushing involved), jisung is trying hard to be an equal middle person between his bestfriends and respect boundaries, pls prepare because the next update will not be fun ... 😅

minho: get to work okay?

you: yes!

minho: stopping by?

you: maybe.. ☺️

minho: 🥺

minho: i'm literally just down the street, why is it a 'maybe?'

minho: i never hear chan or seungmin get 'maybe's'

minho: san too......

you: oh please, how would you know!

you: chan and seungmin are my favorites, remember? same thing with san 😉

minho: bye 😞

You giggle to yourself as you tuck your phone in your pocket, knowing Minho is probably sulking after the teasing you've done. A little teasing shouldn't hurt. Though, it doesn't change the fact that you do plan on visiting him during your break and it doesn't change the fact that you really, really miss him already.

And he really, really misses you, too.

☁︎ FLASHBACK | THE OTHER NIGHT

"Y/N?" You hear your name being called, followed by a few soft knocks. You get up from the easel, halting the current watercolor painting you were working on. When you pop your head out of the room, you see Minho looking through the small windows on your door— a smile tugging at the corners of your lips.

"Hi." You smile up at him. "What're you doing here?"

"Just wanted to see you." You step aside to let him in, bits of the cold, night air rushing in just before you shut the door close. 

"Didn't you have class?" He nods, pushing the hood down from his head. 

"Yeah, took a quick shower then came here." He chuckles. 

"How was it?"

"Good. Tiring." He says, sitting on the edge of your bed when you return to the easel. "What're you working on?" 

"Trying to paint one of the flowers from the conservatory." You giggle. "What's your house up to?"

"Nothing. When I left, Ji and Seungmin were playing this board game while Chan was just watching his show in the living room."

"I don't think I'm any better company." You laugh.

"You are."

"Did you teach today, or did Hyunjin teach?"

"Hyunjin. I had to help him figure out his last 8 count though because he didn't know how to close out the piece." You nod as you continue to paint the last strip of pink onto the canvas, setting your brush down off to the side before getting up to keep Minho company.

"Did you eat?"

"Kinda yeah, but I'm not hungry."

"You sure?" Minho nods, pulling you in between his legs. He gently wraps his arms around you and lays his head against your stomach. Minho doesn't say anything, but you can feel him relaxing in your hold— your arms wrapped around him while your hand massages the back of his head. "You okay?"

"Mhm." He mumbles. "I just really missed you." You're not sure if Minho is speaking in the moment, because his actions, the way he doesn't want to let you go, says he's speaking about the past. How he's been feeling. How he's been yearning for you just as you have for him. It's more than a simple 'i miss you.'

"I missed you, too." He looks up at you, resting his chin against your stomach. "Come, let's go and watch something, yeah?" You unwrap his arms from around your waist, slipping your hand into his to lead the way. Before you can walk further into the living room, Minho pulls you back. Your body is pressed flush against his, his hands on your hips and giving them a gentle squeeze. "What?" You shyly giggle.

"Nothing, I like looking at you, remember?" He breaks his silence, a small laugh falling from his lips. He edges forward to kiss you on the forehead, before moving down to your lips; hands squeezing at your hips again to show you how much he loves kissing you.

How much he adores you.

You only smile at him before leading the way to the couch, where Minho plops onto his side and makes some room for you to lay in front of him. There's a debate about which movie is going up, but Minho quickly waves the white flag and surrenders the decision to you. He doesn't mind watching Hocus Pocus even though it isn't remotely close to Halloween yet, he just wants to be here with you;

Holding you, keeping you close.

Feeling your warmth against him.

Minho is surprised that you even make it past halfway into the movie before you fall asleep. He chuckles to himself when he hears your soft snores amongst the Hocus Pocus background noise. He presses a few kisses to the back of your head that wakes you up for a few seconds— only for you to shift in your position and face him. 

"Baby, do you want to sleep in your bed?" He whispers, hoping you're still awake enough to hear him. "I can go and let you sleep."

"No." You simply mutter against him, shifting closer to his body as if there was no way you'd separate from him at this moment.

"Okay." Is all he says before he's silently chuckling again, wrapping an arm around you to keep you safe. Because this time, he will. He can't help but press a few more feathery kisses across your face, making sure to give a little more love to your scars. 

He missed you.

Really, really missed you.

And this time, he'll keep you safe. He'll protect you, choose you. 

Yours.

☁︎ END

"What's the cute giggle fit for?" Mrs. Pak smiles at you and softly nudges your arm, making you shake your head. 

"Oh, nothing. I'm just, happy?" You respond in a questioning tone, followed by another small giggle.

"Happy looks good on you, sweetheart." Mrs. Pak chuckles as she helps you get a big bouquet together. "Is it San?"

"San." You repeat his name. "Right, I forgot to tell you about that." You give her a small toothless smile. "Just friends."

"You talked to him?"

"I did. He was very sweet about it."

"Good. How did you do it? Tell me all about that evening."

"It was nice! He took me to that famous unagi restaurant and Peace Piece. Then, he took me to the movies for the Studio Ghibli event. We watched Spirited Away."

"That sounds like a lovely evening."

"It was." You look at her. "He took me to the beach to talk about everything, but he was very understanding about it when I told him I just wanted to stay friends. I told him I thought we worked well this way."

"It's good he was understanding. Says alot about his character and how much he respects you."

"He's truly a great friend. It hasn't been long, but San has done a lot to help me feel comfortable, especially in my own skin."

"That's good." She hands you some ribbons. "How about the one you have feelings for?" You giggle.

"The one that I have feelings for? Hm, he's one of my bestfriends." You fiddle with the ribbon and tie it nicely around the tissue paper to keep the bouquet secured. "He actually owns that café down the street. Sunday Morning."

"Oh, he does? I've gone there before, it's a nice café." 

"Mm, yeah. Might pay him a little visit later." You smile at her.

"What's his name?"

"Minho. Me and Jisung met him in high school." She nods. "I'm not really sure how to explain this, but I've always felt something for Minho after I woke up. I feel connected to him on a deeper level—" You pause just as you set the bouquet aside. "Attached, almost."

"Do you guys have history?" You shrug.

"I think so. Wish I could remember. But, Minho said he'd tell me in time. He didn't wanna rush it because he didn't wanna overwhelm me." Mrs. Pak gives you a toothless smile. "I trust him. I know he'll tell me when the time is right."

"That's good. He wants to tell you, I'm sure. But, he's still thinking about you and helping you get comfortable."

"I'm just scared."

"Why scared?"

"I.. I don't know. I don't really know what to expect."

"That's okay. I'm sure he'll tell you, just like you said. When the time is right." You nod.

"Yeah." You simply agree before grabbing a vase to fix another bouquet. "I don't know how else to say it, really. But, I like him. A lot. We.." You let out a small sigh. "Things happened between us already over the past few days. It escalated so quickly? But, I don't think any of this is weird. These aren't unfamiliar feelings."

"Sometimes, the heart just knows."

"What if our history isn't the greatest?"

"Well, that's okay. We are only human, and we aren't perfect." Mrs. Pak softly says next to you. "It's up to you how you'd like to take it, but I would take it as something that can help you grow and learn. We are always learning, and there are always ways to improve. It's never a linear path, my dear." You sigh and nod, eyes darting to the customers that just walked in.

"True."

"Do I get to meet this young man?" You chuckle just as you walk away from the front, looking over your shoulder with a small smile.

"Of course. I'd love for you to meet him and my friends—" At this moment, just as you're about to greet the customers that had walked in, another body comes through the front door; eyes landing right onto you just as you shift your attention to them.

"Minho." He smiles when he hears his name slip from your lips, watching as you tuck your hair behind your ear shyly.

"Hey." He steps in and patiently waits for you to tend to the customers. You walk over in the cutest outfit, with the brightest smile on your face, and Minho can't help but melt. 

"What're you doing here, sir?" You joke and he holds up a cold drink and a pastry bag.

"Since you didn't wanna visit, I thought I'd come make the walk." He hands you the drink and food. "Also wanna make sure you're eating."

"I am, or.. I will." You chuckle. "Once I get a little break." You turn to look at Mrs. Pak as she's ringing up a customer, a small smirk planted on her face. "Come." You loosely lace your fingers with his, dragging him over to Mrs. Pak for a quick little meet-and-greet. "Speaking of Minho."

"Speaking of Minho? What does that mean?" He asks, and you simply laugh it off.

"Mrs. Pak, Minho. Minho, Mrs. Pak."

"Oh, he's a handsome fella." Minho blushes, shyly acknowledging her from your side. "You know how to pick 'em." She whispers and teases you. "It's nice to finally meet you. I've heard quite a bit about you."

"Only good things I hope." He looks at you and you simply shrug. "I hope I'm not being a bother, just wanted to make sure she had something to eat." Minho scratches at his temple. "I'm sorry I didn't bring another for you, Mrs. Pak."

"It's okay." She smiles and nods at you. "Go take your break, I'll be here."

"Are you sure?" 

"Yes, go. It's time anyway."

"I'll be right back." You reassure her even though you know she isn't looking for it. You look up at Minho and he gives her another small smile and a shy wave, rubbing his grubby hands against his jeans when he gives her one last goodbye.

"It was nice meeting you, Mrs. Pak."

"You too, handsome!"

"Please." You mutter just as you turn on your heel to walk out the door and Minho scoffs.

"Wow, someone's in a mood today."

"No." You giggle. "You didn't have to drop by, I was going to come." You start walking towards the nearest bench until you feel Minho's hand gently wrap around your wrist and pull you back towards him.

"Were you?" He pulls you close to him, hands slowly wrapping around your waist. "Cause it almost seemed like you were gonna go visit San instead." You laugh.

"Just a joke." You playfully hit him. "Besides, he's still my friend, you know? You're gonna have to get used to San." Minho purses his lips into a tight smile.

"Right." His slight jealousy leaves when he feels your lips against his cheeks, your eyes falling back onto his— glistening like they hold the entire universe in those orbs. 

"But anyways, I was going to visit. Because I kinda sorta missed you?" You say so innocently, so shyly, all doe-eyed and pure.

"I missed you, too." Minho taps the tip of your nose before giving you a chaste kiss to the forehead. He laces his fingers with yours, finally bringing you over to the bench to sit and let you eat.

"What did you make today?" You chuckle when you peek into the pastry bag, finding a thick, fluffy, slice of coffee cake. "Coffee cake?" You look at him and sip on your iced vanilla latté.

"Mhm."

"You spoil me too much."

"I don't, not enough at least." You giggle.

"Shop busy?" Minho shrugs.

"Hm, it's been on and off. The usual. You?"

"Mm, nothing too overwhelming."

"That's good." You both sit for awhile, enjoying the the fresh air, the perfect breeze. Minho has his arm resting on the bench behind you, finger gently drawing shapes on your arm. "You've been feeling okay, right?"

"Mhm. I feel great." You nod and look at him. "It's been nice being able to help Mrs. Pak out."

"She seems very sweet." 

"She is." You chuckle.

"You sure we can't hang out tonight?" Minho brushes the hair away from your face.

"Nope. I promised my uncle I'd have a movie night with him. It's the first night he doesn't really have something to urgently work on. Says he can finally sit back and relax for a bit." You chuckle.

"That's good. He deserves some rest." You nod, popping another piece of the coffee cake into your mouth.

"Yeah, he does. Maybe we can hang out tomorrow after pottery class?"

"Here we go again with the maybe's." He pouts, making you laugh.

"I'm sorry. We will, okay? I'll come by and wait for you."

"You sure?" You nod.

"Positive." You check your phone and sip the vanilla latté a little more, letting out a small sigh. "I should probably get back in there. Thank you for my coffee cake and drink." You stand and do a little stretch, Minho following suit.

"Of course. Just needed to make sure you were okay."

"I am, especially now." You smile. "Thanks again. I'll call you later?"

"Okay, sounds good." Minho cups your cheeks and gently caresses the surface before pulling you into a quick, but sweet kiss. "Have a good rest of your shift, okay?" He continues to look you in the eye and caress your cheek before pulling back to let you go. "Call me if you need me."

"I will." You wave him goodbye, turning on your heel to continue your shift. You take one more look at Minho, who is still waiting until you safely make it back to the register before stepping away.

That night, Minho cooks dinner for him and his roommates— setting aside the food on serving plates until they find themselves hungry and ready to eat. He gathers his own plate and pours himself some beer before walking out to the outdoor sectional in the backyard. He pulls up some videos on Youtube, occasionally watching in between bites to entertain himself while also responding to your texts. He's a bit sad since your responses are slightly delayed, but he understands that you've been wanting to spend time with Uncle Adrian, and you should be. 

He just misses you, and feels a constant need, yearning, for you whenever you aren't around.

"Yo." Jisung pops out into the backyard from the house, adjusting his beanie as he plops onto the sectional next to Minho. "Just eating?"

"Mhm. I made some extras, they're on the counter."

"Thanks." Jisung leans forward and rest his arms onto his knees. "I'll probably eat a bit later. What else have you been up to?"

"Nothing really. Been kinda bored. Popped in to check on Y/N earlier while she was at work."

"She was okay?"

"Yeah, she seems happy to be there." Minho shrugs. "I met the owner, she's really sweet."

"That's good. Where is Y/N?"

"Movie night with Uncle Adrian." Jisung nods. 

"I haven't really texted her today, I've been swamped at work." Jisung lets out a small sigh. "You don't have class today?" He shakes his head.

"Nope."

"Wanna do something then? Where's Channie and Seungmo?"

"Like what? Seungmin is taking a nap in his room and Chan hasn't been home."

"Damn, nevermind then."

"We can hop on FIFA after I eat?" Minho asks him, trying to keep him entertained for tonight.

"Okay." Jisung responds right before nodding towards Minho's phone. "What're you watching?"

"I've been trying to perfect this recipe for awhile, so I'm trying to see how other people bake it." Jisung watches, even though he has no interest in baking or cooking whatsoever. But, it doesn't last long when he's easily distracted by Minho's text tone all of a sudden going off.

One text,

and another,

and another.

He can't help but be a little nosy to see who's blowing up his phone. Surprisingly, it isn't you. And this is the shit Jisung was afraid of.

"Dude." Jisung furrows his brows at Minho's phone, watching the un-named number pop up a few times. Even though it no longer has a name to it, Jisung knows.

"What?"

"Okay, seriously. Can we talk about this?" Jisung pauses the video for Minho before pointing at the texts coming through.

"Shit. It's Kat." Minho groans. "It's really not what it looks like though." He sighs and picks up his phone, briefly scrolling through the angry texts from Kat. All of a sudden. "I cut it off with her completely awhile ago and blocked her number. She's texting from someone else's phone."

"Okay, but you can't say you're done with her and keep the line open. Block that too and be done with it. She's obviously going to keep creating issues if she feels like you'll keep letting her in."

"I'm not letting her in, okay? It's done. Completely."

"Please don't repeat your behavior, for the love of god. I know you hate the nagging. But, how am I supposed to react when Kat is still popping up on your phone even though you claimed you were done with her before?" Minho groans a bit and lays back on the outdoor sectional.

"I really have no intentions of going back. I swear I haven't reached out to her. This is the first time she's trying to text me again on someone else's phone, I'm not even sure why she's texting me all angry." Jisung watches as Minho texts away and asks for her to stop reaching out, blocking the number and deleting the thread shortly afterwards.

"Swear on our friendship?" Jisung asks.

"Swear. I don't know where this is coming from." Jisung sighs a bit and shrinks back into his seat.

"I just.. I don't know. I think we're all just scared about you reverting back to your old ways. It takes two to tango, but Kat has always played a big part in this." Minho sighs.

"I know, I know. I hear you." 

"Have you even told Y/N? Because I know you're trying to get back together with her. But, I think that's a crucial step that you need to take first no matter how it makes everything turn out. It'll need some time and I think that's much needed. Not saying I don't ever want you to stop proving yourself and try again, but I think you both need the time to heal."

"I do plan to tell her."

"Alone?" 

"It's better if I do."

"When are you going to tell her?" Minhi shrugs at the question and lets out another sigh. 

"Tomorrow." Minho solidifies the thought because even though it will kill him to do so, it’s time for him to be honest about it.

"Okay. I just need you to tell her before it's too late, or if she somehow finds out through word of mouth. It'll be harder for her, and it could seriously fuck everything up." Jisung looks up at Minho and he can't even lie, he feels his heart ache a bit seeing how distraught and conflicted he is. He knows he loves you, and that has never changed. He just made the wrong choices.

"I.. I know. I'm going to." Minho swallows the lump in his throat before shifting his attention to Jisung. "I'm sorry."

"I'm just afraid." Jisung says lowly. "It's not that I don't trust you to do better, I just hate seeing her hurt. She's been through so much, and the whole reason I did this was because I just wanted to give her time." Jisung shrugs. "Time to get used to the world and being in it again. I didn't want to see her shrink and hide from the world again. That's all."

"I made some really dumb mistakes, but I wouldn't hurt her. Not again. I'm learning from all of that, and I don't ever wanna go back."

"Yeah." Is all Jisung responds with because of course he wants to trust him. But, he'd be lying if he said he does fully. He can't. Not after he sees Minho prove himself a bit more. "You're going to tell her about that night too, right?"

"Yeah, I have to. I'm sorry, I really am." Minho repeats.

"I'm sorry, too. I'm sorry I haven't really been there for you but.. Y/N." He looks at Minho and shrugs. "Maybe time would be really good for the both of you."

"I understand. I really do. However this pans out, I'll be there for her. I'll respect her space and give her all the time she needs." Minho's thoughts shift back to that night, his heart wrenching thinking about it because not only had he broken up with you once over Kat, but he acted like he chose her that night. When in reality, that was never the case. You got back together and things seemed great— until that very night. The argument was huge, Minho can still hear the yelling repeating in his head; over and over again like a fucking siren. 

You got back together with him because you trusted him to love you, to protect you and keep you safe.

But, he didn't. He didn't protect you, keep you safe. He acted like he chose her that night.

He let you leave even though he shouldn't have.

"Either way— please." Jisung says close to a whisper. "All I ask is that you're sure this time. No more playing with her emotions, no more second-guessing her. Please mean it."

☁︎ FLASHBACK | SENIOR YEAR IN COLLEGE

When Jisung is finally able to get you to bed so that you can take a nap, he leaves a note saying he'll be back and that he's grabbing some food for you to eat later.

Which, isn't entirely a lie. But, he has other plans right now.

He's fuming as he pulls off to the side of the curb, barely putting the car in park before he's hopping out and racing to the apartment.

"The hell is wrong with you?!" Jisung storms into the shared apartment and pushes Minho.

"What the hell is wrong with you?!" Minho pushes him back. "Not today, Jisung. I'm not doing this—"

"No, you don't get to do that. I just left Y/N after she's been crying for hours over you!"

"Am I fucking wrong to be honest?! I just think we need some time apart to figure things out."

"Figure things out? You've clearly figured things out. If I only knew you'd pull this and leave her for somebody else, I wouldn't have let this shit happen in the first place." Jisung furrows his brows at him and shakes his head. "You don't even look like you care—"

"Of course I do!" Minho's tone raises. "God, it was the fucking hardest thing to do! Of course I care about her, that's why I didn't wanna hurt her more!"

"Then why do it!" Jisung yells back. 

"I don't know!" It falls silent between the two before Minho lets out a breath and runs his hand through his hair. "I don't know what to tell you. I really tried not to, but it just wasn't happening. It wasn't working." Jisung scoffs.

"All because of Kat?" Silence, again. "What the hell has Kat given you that Y/N hasn't?" More silence. "Right."

"I'm sorry." Minho says lowly. "I love Y/N, I do. I just haven't felt in love with her for awhile now. I don't really know what it is, I thought maybe—"

"Bullshit! Not with the way you easily disposed of her and made her feel replaceable." Jisung shakes his head. "You don't get to say shit. There's gonna be a day when you realize that tossing your relationship over one girl wasn't worth it, but I hope you don't come crawling back. Y/N is worth way more than that." Jisung begins to walk away but comes back to face Minho once more, stepping closer towards him. "I trusted you. I really trusted you to take care of her and be there for her. I would've understood if you two needed some time apart, but never would I have imagined that you'd do it over another girl." Jisung probably sound so ridiculous calling his bestfriend out, but what can he say? He really is upset, and he really did trust Minho to take care of you. There wasn't a single thing that made Jisung think he'd ever leave your side. Sure, he noticed Minho getting close to Kat, but he didn't think it'd get to the point of this—

Of hurting you, leaving you;

Making you think you were disposable. Replaceable. Not worthy enough to stay.

Because you are worthy, you are all the amazing things and then some. If it's anybody who would know, it's Jisung. You've always been his other half, and he knows how big your heart is. You've always put everyone else before yourself, and you've always given your all— loved harder than anybody else has loved.

Minho was making a mistake.

But Minho is also his bestfriend, and he knows he would prefer for him to be honest. He wouldn't want him to go behind your back, god no. He just doesn't understand Minho's thinking process, and maybe he never will.

Wasn't this just a phase?

Was it really worth throwing it all away to see if something new would make him happy?

Maybe. 

Jisung doesn't really understand it entirely.

What he does know is that he's angry at Minho, and he's hurting to see you cry. What he does know is that he can't really look at Minho right now, and he can't really talk to him. What he does know is that he may not be able to talk to him properly for awhile. 

"What just happened here?" Chan asks, confused as he walks through the door. He feels the tension already, and he's not sure how to react. He's barely seen Minho and Jisung like this.

"I don't know, ask him. Maybe he'll tell you more." Jisung diverts his attention to Chan briefly before returning to Minho. "Whatever. Do you, dude. But, keep your bullshit away from Y/N."

☁︎ END

♡ taglist: @ppiri-bahng @jihanlovic @meloncremesoda @sweetlikecherry @asjkdk @hoes4lino @skzddicted @skzho @edgaralienpoe @harui-zen @bestleeknowstan @havenwithleeknow @septicrebel @heesdazed @borahae-reads @yoontaethings @pearbunny @bintific @lukeys-giggle @ajxreads @everglowdaisies @allaboutsan @endzii23 @leeknowsramen @heres-your-ramen2000 @morningstardada @mal-lunar-28 @downbadreading @lilysophie @feelikecinderella @urmomma0324 @ddazed-lhs @djeniryuu @melanctton @i8rsie @maru-matt @sleepyleeji @taerifin @nattisbored @jisunglyricist @m111nho @drhsthl @nixtape-foryou @arminseas @guiltycoco @syuuji @sulkygyu @cadihyo @reianagarcia @leeknowyah @smndjdufuehr @dprkbyn @xxibreinaxx @mxnsxngie @reiheis @mellowmentalitydragon @vixensss

[djeniryuu]

Lee Minho Fic Recs (2021)

Last Updated: —

P.S.: Please let me know if any of the links aren’t working

a - angst, f - fluff, s - smut, ✔- completed

♡ - personal favourite

* - newly added

Stories by Year:

2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023, 2024

Oneshots:

⇢ 7 Days (3.7k) - (f) » university!au, best friends to lovers

⇢ 23:16 (1.2k) - (s) 

⇢ 24 Hours After Your Death (1.8k) - (a) ♡  » tw: death

⇢ Appetizer (2.4k) - (s)

⇢ Between the Lines (9.7k) - (f) » librarian!minho, student!au

⇢ By Now (17.6k) - (a, f, s) » friends with benefits to strangers to lovers

⇢ Crimson Rose (3k) - (a) » highschool!au

⇢ Dad!Minho (2.4k) - (a, f, s) » dad!minho, nanny!reader

⇢ Dilf!Minho (1.4k) - (s) » single dad!minho

⇢ Dumb and Ridiculous! (10k) - (f) » university!au, frenemies to lovers

⇢ Face Your Feelings (7.1k) - (f) » best friends to lovers, prosopagnosia

⇢ From Home (3.4k) - (a) » neighbours!au

⇢ Hymn of the Winds (5.5k) - (f) » arabian mythology, royal!au, husband!minho

⇢ If I Hated You… (0.4k) - (a, f)

⇢ Inexperienced (6.2k) - (s) » virgin!reader

⇢ Kingdom Come (3.4k) - (f, s) » royalty!au, prince!minho

⇢ Leave the Door Open (12.3k) - (a, f, s) ♡  » sugarbaby!au, friends with benefits to lovers

⇢ Life Support (0.6k) - (a)

⇢ Mischief & Mistletoe (8.1k) - (f) » friends to lovers

⇢ Of Poison Love & Never Agains (6k) - (a, f)  » royalty!au, prince!minho, princess!reader

⇢ Queen of the Night (9.7k) - (a, f) » royalty!au, king!minho, queen!reader

⇢ The Enemies to Lovers Project (18k) - (f) ♡  » enemies to lovers, university!au

⇢ The One That Got Away (2.4k) - (a)  » exes!au

⇢ The Other Girl (4.3k) - (a, f)  » university!au

⇢ They Cheat On You and Regret It (0.5k) - (a) 

⇢ Your Heart & Your Headache, Too (9.6k) - (f)  » strangers to lovers, god!minho

Series:

⇢ Meant to Be - (a, f, sm!au) ✔  » exes to lovers, social media!au

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5,  Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10,  Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15,  Part 16 (Final) 

⇢ Rival (12.9k) - (f, s) ✔  » office!au

Part 1, Part 2 (Final) 

⇢ Sanguis Limerence ft. Bang Chan (180k) - (a, f, s) ✔ ♡ » poly!au, vampire!au, action

Sanguis Limerence: Awakening (150k)

Sanguis Limerence: Origins (Individual Characters’ Backstory)

⇢ Trust Fall (107.6k) - (action, a, f) ✔  » spy!au, action

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5  Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10  Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15  Part 16, Part 17 (Final) 

[emilyssky]

Chapter 11: Midnight Memories

PAIRING: Lee Know! X fem!reader

GENRE(S): college au, smut, angst

WARNINGS: Mentions of violence and abuse, depression, self-harm, eating disorders etc.. mentions of blood, swearing, smoking, smut [ dirty talk, oral; giving and receiving, choking, spanking, praising, degradation, pet names, sometimes Minho is a dick :)

SUMMARY: "Do you remember what you told me the first time we met?"  

"What?"

"You said; Always leave people a little better than you found them" he looked at the floor with a small smile for a few seconds and then his eyes found mine. "You really annoyed me when we first met. I envied your optimism and excitement for life. But each time I saw you, I felt a certain thrill. You made me angry, you made me laugh., you made me feel everything. Something about you made me feel a little more alive each time. I know I fucked up and I know I'm an asshole but I'm also brutally in love with you."  

Author’s note: This is one of my favourite chapters, hope you enjoy <333  

"What is this place?" I move closer behind him, the sound of the door opening drawing all the attention to us. The smell of alcohol and weed hits my nose immediately as we walk further inside. The bar is quite big, all the walls are a dark shade of grey with pieces of art and different paintings hanging from them. The actual bar is a black circle center right in the middle, with a beautiful, black chandelier hanging above it. The music is not that loud, creating more of a chill vibe but still, the place is quite crowded.

"Hey, man." Minho greets the guy behind the bar.

"Did you miss me already?" The blonde guy teases him, pulling a glass and placing it on the counter in front of us.

"Oh, no I'm not here for a drink." He waves him off. "Is Will at the back?"

"Yeah." He nods, moving his eyes to me. I offer him a small smile, feeling too awkward to introduce myself.

"Can you keep an eye on her for a minute? " He asks him.

I look at him confused, touching the sleeve of his jacket to get his attention. "Where are you going?"

"It will take 5 minutes, I just need to grab something." He explains. "Just stay here," He takes a step forward but turns around. "and please don't do anything stupid." I watch as he disappears behind a big black door before turning to the bartender.

He offers me a tight smile. "Do you want a shot?" he says, nodding at the glass he had pulled out for Minho.

I'll definitely need as much alcohol in my system as I can handle without blacking out to handle Minho. "Sure."

.                             * .♥︎ * ･ ｡ﾟ. ♥︎* ･ ｡ﾟ. * ･♥︎ ｡ﾟ. * ･ ♥︎｡ﾟ

The 5 minutes, turned into 10 and the 10 turned into 15 but the blonde guy, whose name I found out to be Jack is doing a great job at keeping me entertained. At first, I was watching him make all the drinks that people had ordered, but since it's not that busy right now and I probably seemed way too curious, I'm currently behind the bar with him, trying to learn how to make a Negroni.

"I said one shot! " He pulls the bottle of gin I'm holding away from the glass where we're making the drink.

"Well, I don't know how much a shot is exactly." I giggle.

"Can you even see this glass, after 5 shots of tequila?"

"Yes, give it back." I reach for the bottle but he raises it higher.

"Nope." His dimples make an appearance.

I make a few unsuccessful attempts to reach it before narrowing my eyes at him. I see an empty bottle of wine and reach for it. "Give me the bottle back, before it gets nasty." I raise my eyes brows at his laughing face.

"What, and I can not emphasize this enough, the fuck are you doing?" Minho stands in front of us on the opposite side of the bar with his hands resting on his hips.

"I'm training to be a bartender. " I explain, lowering the bottle.

Minho turns to Jack. "Don't look at me." He lifts his hands in defence.

"I told you to stay out of trouble." He looks around the bar, relieved that none's attention is on us.

I pout and jump on the counter, pulling my legs to the other side, where Minho stands. "Well, I got bored."

He lets out a sigh. "Be careful." His hands find my waist and I giggle when I jump back down, landing right in front of him.

He scrunches his nose, lifting an eyebrow at me. "What did you drink?"

"We did shots." I squeal.

Minho narrows his eyes at Jack. "She did," he points at me. "I'm working. You got it?"

Minho simply nods.

"What?" I curiously ask.

"Nothing." He dismisses me, dropping his hands.

I frown at his lack of explanation. "You brought me here, to this male-filled, weed-smelling bar without a single explanation, left me waiting for half an hour and your answer is 'nothing'? " I cross my arms.

"She's funny," Jack rests his arms on the bar. "and kinda right."

"Shut up." Minho sends him a glare. "Come on, let's go." He takes my hand in his, not giving me time to protest, and pulls me along, out of the bar."

"I'm not having fun." I open the car door and jump into the passenger seat. He gets inside the car, a soft smirk playing on his lips. His hands reach for the wheel, his fingertips brushing against it as he starts the car.

"Why did you leave me waiting for half an hour?" I ask again.

"I was getting some weed, among other things." He drily says, keeping his eyes on the road. I feel my body tensing up a little at his words. My experience with drugs has not been the best.

"Are you using?" I clear my throat.

"Why are you saying it like that?" His lips twist with amusement. "Like it's a bad thing."

"Cause it is." I turn my body slightly towards his.

"You were getting ready to smoke a big, fat blunt and chug down a whole bottle of wine when I came and you're lecturing me?" He laughs, making a turn and slowing down the car. I don't answer, instead, I look out the window curiously, trying to see any buildings or streets to navigate where we are but all I see are unfamiliar roads and a shit ton of trees.

"We're here." The car comes to a stop and his raspy voice fills the small, now quiet space.

"Is this the part where you force me deep down the dark alley and rape me?" I joke not moving. I like to say that I trust him. My mind somehow feels safe with him but truth is that I don't know him at all. Even though he has conquered a huge part of my mind in the past month in a way he still remains a stranger to me. A beautiful mystery that I, so desperately wanna discover if he lets me but for now, how much can I really trust him?

He gets out of the car, and the sound of the door slamming shakes me a bit. He walks over to my side and opens the door. I look at him and then take another look around the area. We have parked at the end of a street that I don't really recognize but I can see some houses and apartment complexes so we can't be that far away. Still, I'm a little skeptical, my legs not comfortable or confident enough to move, so I stay seated.

He rests his hand on the open door, dropping his face a little lower. His eyes hold a questioning look. "Do you trust me?"

"No." My answer is fast and sharp. "I don't know you."

"Do you want to?" He challenges.

Yes. So much.

My heart jumps a little at his words but I say nothing again. Instead, I get out of the car, earning a noise of satisfaction from him. He slams the door shut, locking the car before leading the way silently into the alley, and I wrap my arms around my body following close behind him. I feel chills spreading down my arms the more we walk and I don't not if it's from the fact that this looks like it was taken out of a horror movie or the fact that I'm finally alone with him. The hidden excitement grows the more I think about it and a million things run through my mind, questions I wanna ask him and words I wanna say to him but I bite my tongue, keeping silent as we reach the end of the alley. A small flight of stairs is attached to the wall.

He takes a step back, gesturing for me to go first.

"I'm not going first," I scoff, shaking my head. "my ass is gonna be on full display."

He moves his lips, trying to stop them from forming a smile. "It's just so that I can catch you if you slip, stupid."

I can feel the blood rushing to my cheeks. "Oh. " I look away. Thank god, it's dark. I climb the first step, that's just a little above the ground and look up, checking how far up it goes. The building is at least 7 or 8 floors.

"Just don't look down, okay?" He comes up behind me. I feel his hands ghosting over my hips, his breath close to the back of my head. I don't look back, I hold on to the rusty metal and slowly I place my foot over the next step. I take a few seconds, trying to focus. I definitely shouldn't be doing this after drinking.

"It's okay, I got you." He says in a gentle whisper and I begin to climb until I reach the top not turning around to see if Minho's right behind me. I step on the open roof, the chilly air hitting my face immediately. I walk a little, admiring the perfect view of the city, all the lights glistering like sparkles into the night. The roof is square and open, without some sort of railing protecting the perimeter.

"Um," I turn to Minho after hearing him reach the top. "what exactly is that?" The roof is completely empty except for a big, black, leather, three-seat couch positioned right in the middle.

"It's a couch." He casually says walking right past me and taking a seat. I stand there, looking at him as he gets comfortable, trying to comprehend how the fuck is there a couch in the middle of a roof.

"How-"

"I don't know." He doesn't let me finish. "I just found it here."

"How did you find this place?" I can't move my eyes from the sky, not even to look at Minho. I've been to many rooftops, searching for the perfect illusion of uncaged freedom and complete quiet yet this must be one of the best ones.

"By accident." He mumbles. I feel his eyes on me as I move around, walking a little closer to where he's sitting, still admiring the night sky. I send him a look, knowing there's more to the story.

He clicks his tongue. "I was dealing some weed in the alley."

My eyes slightly widen, and I shake my head a little. "Are you dealing?" I lower my tone, even though I know none can possibly hear us up here.

"I was when I was 16." He wears a smug expression.

I move to the couch with slow steps, avoiding his eyes as I take a sit as far from where he sits as possible. "Why?" I dare to ask.

His eyebrows twitch. "I was trying to make money to help my mum leave him." He keeps his eyes on me as he speaks, waiting to catch any reaction probably and I know that by 'him' he's referring to his father. It's still a shock to me how he opened up about his past that night, the look in his eyes was so genuine and my heart ached more with each word of his. I think that that was the night he invaded my mind completely. I wish I could be this honest with him as well.

I get comfortable, pulling my knees to my chest. "I like writing."

He tilts his head, intrigued. "What?"

"I'm extremely bad at singing but I love writing music." I continue, not really thinking, I just let the words pour out of my mouth. "I love baking and taking photos. Actually, I always carry my camera with me cause I find inspiration literally anywhere. I'm obsessed with books and movies, anything really that helps me escape reality. I love dogs and grew up with 3, and 2 cats. I'm allergic to raisins and my favorite color is green." I turn to face him. The way he looks at me makes my breath stop for a split second. His dark eyes, draw invisible lines across my face moving everywhere, studying. He has his arm resting on the back of the couch, his whole body facing mine, as though he's giving every bit of his attention.

"What are you doing?" He mutters.

"I'm happy you shared your past with me that night." I offer him a tiny nod, thanking him in a way. "I'm forever grateful for the people I have around me and the love I have for them is greater than the one I'll ever have for myself but still I can't bring myself, to be honest with them. With anyone actually." I shallow. "The thing that I'm scared of the most is being defined by my past. And my past is a huge weight that I force myself to silently carry every day up until now, never really accepting it. Thank you for opening up to me, it meant a lot. I really wanna do the same, but it's kinda hard. So I'm starting with the easier things."

His lips part, blinking as if he's lost in thought. If my mind weren't so intoxicated I would be a ball of shame right now but instead, my chest fills with courage. "What?" I chuckle at his silence.

He shakes his head, and I can almost see him shaking away whatever he was thinking or wanted to say. "How would you describe me in one word?" He says.

I push my lips together, his question sparking excitement inside me. I take a moment to think, I want to answer right cause questions like this tend to go deeper than it seems. But my answer isn't thoughtful at all, it was the first thing I thought about him when I first saw him.

"Magnetic." I truthfully whisper.

His eyebrows shoot up, a softness overtakes his gaze and for some reason, I feel the need to elaborate.

"There's just something about you that's," I pause searching for the right word. " interesting. You pull me in in ways that I can't really explain and I find myself wanting to know more and more about you." I shock myself with the boldness of my words but I honestly don't know when I'll ever have an opportunity like this.

He seems shocked as well. Simply blinking at me, his face so beautifully natural with all the emotion coming only from his eyes.

"Why?" He murmurs.

"Why what?"

He drops his gaze. " Why do you think about me like that?"

"I don't know, I just do." I shrug. It's the first time I've heard his tone so.. doubtful. "How would you describe me in one word?"

"One word isn't enough to describe you, angel." He muses, a slight smirk on his face.

You quirk up an eyebrow at his smooth attempt, even though your stomach twists at his words. "You're avoiding the question."

His teeth make an appearance, capturing his bottom lip as he smiles with a small headshake. He pulls out his pack of cigarettes and pulls one out with his teeth. My eyes catch the action and I'm trying not to focus on his lips but that must be one of the hottest things I've ever seen. He doesn't waste any time, lighting the tip and inhaling like it's his oxygen. He exhales, the smoke blending with the night breeze.

"Can I have one?"

"No." He exhales again.

I pout. "Why can you smoke and I can't?"

He wets his lips, the hand that holds the cigarette hanging over the back of the couch. "Smoking isn't good for you."

I let out a laugh at the irony. "Why do you smoke then?"

"I deeply enjoy fucking myself up." He grins.

I narrow my eyes at him playfully. "That's a convenient excuse." My eyes fall to the pack that's resting on top of his thigh and I reach for it. His eyes catch my action but I'm faster.

"Y/n." He warns.

I open the pack, making sure to maintain eye contact. His eyes harden, as I reach for the cigarette right in the middle and pull it out with my teeth, just like he did. I take it in my hand and reach inside my bag that's laying on the floor near the couch, searching for a pen.

"I don't know if you know but Chan smokes quite a lot as well," I say as I bite the cup of the pen open. "I tried a lot of things to make him quit, but none of them worked. Long-term at least." He observes me quietly. "So, we made a deal to always buy a pack together and only smoke when we're with each other." I start writing on the cigarette as gently as I can. "I would also mark the cigarettes so I'd know if he'd smoke alone, or more than he should."

I admire my sloppy handwriting. Angel.

"Here." I turn it over for him to see.

His eyes read the word silently, and a huge grin breaks out on his lips. "I knew you liked it when I call you that." His tone teases me as he leans closer.

I place the cigarette back in the pack. "Leave this cigarette for last, we're gonna smoke it together. Let's see how long it we'll take for you to finish the pack." I give it back to him.

His eyes spark with something; excitement maybe and he reaches for my ankle. With a sharp move, he pulls me to him, a gasp of surprise leaving my lips. "That will only make me wanna smoke the pack faster." He drawls.

I'm utterly stunned by his action, his hand still wrapped around my ankle that's now laying on his thigh while my other leg is trapped in the small space left between our bodies. A weird sensation washes over my body, the closer I get to his or the minute he touches me, an unexplainable rush of heat and desire that makes me want nothing more than to beg for his touch.

"Why are you playing with me?" The question finally leaves my lips.

He takes a drag of his remaining cigarette, the smoke hitting my face immediately now that I'm this close to him. "Cause you're the most interesting person I've ever met." His words come out unexpectedly, snapping my gaze to his. "You're bright and I feel like I've been living in the darkness so long that my body is just drawn to you." He tilts his chin down, staring deep into my eyes like he's making sure his words reach me in the deepest way possible.

"You say that but you do everything to avoid me." I hate that his words have such an effect on me. "I know that the next time we'll see each other it will be like this never happened. " I add quietly.

"I'm not-" He stops himself and inhales sharply. "Relationships, commitment, and shit like that; it's not my thing."

I try not to show the unexpected disappointment that filled my chest at his statement, letting him continue.

"I have too much baggage." He faces away from me. "It would be unfair to anyone; especially you."

"Have you ever been in a relationship?" I ask.

"To be honest I never wanted to be in one." He scratches the back of his head. "It's too much work and I never felt the need to bother, I'm fine with just fucking around."

The use of present tense felt like a punch to the stomach. Even though he never said it before, his actions and the way he cared for himself generally made it pretty obvious and I knew deep inside that he wouldn't want anything serious. On the other hand, I was never one to play like that. I could only fuck around with people that didn't really interest me on a deeper level, yet I would still feel the need to attach myself to someone. Ever since I was young I remember craving the security of a relationship, the need to be loved and reinsured of my worth. I know that that was a huge part of why I stayed with Jackson, I wasn't strong enough to leave, and I was scared to be by myself.

"Then why am I here?" I question, hoping for a better answer this time. If he doesn't want anything from me, why does he keep coming after me?

He smirks. "Valid point."

A soft smile overtakes my lips against my will and I rest my chin on my bent knee between us. Maybe it's the alcohol or the way his big, brown eyes have softened, looking into my green ones or it could be the unexplainable peace his presents bring me in this exact moment. Either way, I don't think the words that come out of my mouth.

"Do you wanna kiss me?"

He stills. "I wanna do many things to you." His voice deep and dangerously calm.

I can feel my mouth watering, just at the thought. "Then why don't you?" I press.

His lips come together in a thin line, his eyes serious and dark, flickering from my eyes to my lips. "Cause I won't stop."

I look at him through my lashes, completely magnetized by his lips. "What if I don't want you to stop?"

A soft grunt leaves his lips and I move closer, just a little bit until my mouth hovers over his. It takes one look, I look up to his wild eyes and in a split second, with a loud exhale of his, his lips crashed into mine, knocking the air out of my chest. His hands find my jaw immediately, tilting my head upwards and I waste no time opening my mouth, allowing his tongue to brush mine hungrily. My hand tugs at his shirt, pulling him closer as our mouths dance together. My head begins to spin and I can feel the arousal poking in my stomach as his soft lips roughly devour mine. His hand travels from my jaw down to the sides of my neck, slowly making his way down my body. A pathetic moan leaves me as his wandering hands find the curve of my ass. He groans against my lips, pulling me in a shift move to straddle him, not breaking the kiss. My fingers bury themselves in his hair, tugging hard at the roots for resistance as the kiss turns into a sloppy battle. Sharp breaths and wet sounds fill the air. His hands feel rough against my body, squeezing hard everywhere they can until they fall to my ass once again, gripping it tight, pushing my hips down to his crotch. The outline of his growing member brushes against my clothed core and my body sparks with desire and need. I take his bottom lip between my teeth, getting a chance to catch my breath as I keep brushing my hips against his.

"Fuck." He groans against my lips, slightly thrusting up to meet my hips, impatiently.

"See," I breathe out, my heart pounding in my ears. "that wasn't so hard was it?"

His eyes flash with hunger and his hand wraps around my neck. "It's actually really, really hard." He nods down to his dick.

A chuckle escapes my swollen lips, and I lean in to brush my nose against his. His breathing is hard as well, pants of air fan my face, the taste of his cigarette still tingling against the tip of my tongue but I can't help but crave more. I pull away slightly, letting myself save this moment in my memories the best way that I can. I lightly rest my hand on the side of his head, trailing my nails along his jawline, and studying his injured face. The blood from the corner of his lip has almost dried and the bruises along his cheekbone and jaw are getting darker with each hour passing. And just like that I'm forcefully pulled back to reality and reminded of what is waiting for me tomorrow morning. I know Jackson too well and he won't let go of something like this so easily. If I'm being honest I don't really care about myself, in a weird way I feel safe that Jackson won't do anything directly to me, he rather goes about it with the people surrounding me, and right now Minho's the biggest target of all of them. The last thing I want is for Jackson to mess anything up for him.

He moves his hips smoothly yet again, gaining back my attention and pulling me out of my thoughts. My hand is still ghosting over his jaw and I sigh letting my eyes memorize every part of his face. Truth is; I don't wanna lose this moment.

"What is it, angel?" The gentleness of his tone surprises me.

My shoulders shrug. "Just thinking."

His hands run along the sides of my waist, in such a comforting way that I wanna lay on his chest and shut out the whole word for as long as I can. He seems to understand what I mean, not asking me to elaborate more, instead, he lifts a hand to the side of my face forcing my gaze back to his.

His fingertips brush a few curls away from my face. "I love your hair."

I roll my eyes at him, his random compliment lifting the heaviness of the situation off my chest just enough. "I don't."

Silence falls upon us yet again, his effort of conversation not being enough to distract my mind. I'm actually surprised he even tried to start a conversation at all, that's a first.

"Favourite song?" He offers, trying again. His gaze, surprisingly light.

" 'Yellow' by Coldplay ." I blink at him, offering him the first song that came to my mind. "Yours?"

He pushes his lips together, nodding approvingly. "Probably, 'Consume' chase Atlantic." He says without thinking. "Right now at least."

"Obviously." I giggle. He looks like a Chase Atlantic song.

He narrows his eyes playfully "Basic?"

"Predictable." I correct him, even though this man is nothing but predictable.

"Can I ask you-"

"I have something-."

We both say at the same time. Our eyes meet and we let out a small laugh. Suddenly I'm aware of how close we are. I'm aware of my body on top of him and his hands on my waist.

"You go first." I clear my throat and slide off him. His hand grips my legs, keeping them in his lap. He shoots me a confused look but says nothing nevertheless.

'You said that you don't know anything about me but in reality, you know a lot more than I do about you." He says, and it is true.

"I have a hard time opening up to people because..."

"Because?"

"Because they never stick around for long. You want me to open up to you when I don't even know If you're going to talk to me tomorrow." I say seriously but with a small laugh.

He nods his head a few times, understanding what I was saying and not arguing about which makes me a little sad.  "Okay, I respect that. Since you don't wanna talk about your past, I'll have to find other ways to get to know you."

I seal my lips together, trying to stop them from forming a smile. He always says shit like this that makes me warm inside. "Like?"

His hand that's resting on my ankle, starts making its way up my leg, his fingers brushing my skin gently. "Like explore other sides of you that will show me who you truly are." His voice drops as his hand reaches my exposed thigh, his face inches away from mine once again. "Your dreams, your goals, your wants and needs." He dives slowly into the curve between my jaw and neck, attaching his lips lightly right below my ear but it's enough to make my breathing uneven.

"A-and how would you do that?"

His eyes darken. "I can think of a few ways." He studies my face, his eyes roaming everywhere. "Dance for me." He whispers.

I feel my face getting hot. "No." I drop his gaze.

"Come on angel." His index finger lifted my jaw to look back at him.

"I can't."

"Yes, you can." He nods. "It's all in here." He points at the side of my head. "Don't let it block you. Express yourself." The sweetness in his tone made my tensed shoulders drop and relax and the look in his big eyes filled me with reinsurance.

"If you sing, I'll dance." My voice falters.

He tucks a piece of hair behind my ear. "Deal."

"Okay." I lift myself off the couch hesitantly, tugging my dress down. I mentally thank myself for not forgetting to wear shorts underneath, after all the times that I humiliated myself at parties and flashed my underwear at everyone. I take my boots off, kicking them to the side, leaving me in my socks. I test the cold surface of the ground with my feet, taking a few steps forwards, twisting my feet, pointing, and flexing. I look at Minho over my shoulder; he has leaned back, with his leg spread apart and his arms crossed over his chest, looking at me. As if he's waiting for me to crawl his way, and heat spreads across my face once again at the thought. What makes me feel even more embarrassed is the fact that I would crawl for him, if he asked.

"Ready?" He pulls out his phone, and seconds later the intro of "Yellow" begins playing.

I bit my lip, filling my chest with as much air as I can inhale, getting my body and mind ready. I close my eyes, not knowing where to start, I let the music fill my ears hoping for my limps to move by themselves and the minute the lyrics begin, Minho's voice fills the air. The sound is almost angelic, tickling my ears in the most pleasurable way, it's unlike anything I've ever heard. I don't open my eyes as he sings along to the beautiful words of the song, instead, I let myself be fully open and let his voice reach me. And it does. My feet begin to move, and my body follows, with absolutely no choreography in mind, I let the music guide me, I let his voice guide me. I keep my eyes closed as I turn, keeping my right leg perfectly straight and then lift myself into a reverse jump. I don't keep my hands gentle instead my movements are rough, I twist and fall to the ground, and I turn and jump, letting my emotions take over my body completely. I don't know how but I find myself not thinking about anything and that paints a smile on my lips, cause I feel my chest lighter. My breathing comes out short but I don't stop, I push my body harder, and I dance like I haven't in so long. I don't even know how long has passed but I hear the music coming to a stop and I force my body to slow down. I rest my hands on my knees to catch my breath, feeling drops of sweat down the sides of my face and neck and the familiar burning in my throat and stomach. I let out a small laugh at the familiar sensation and lift my eyes to Minho.  He's frozen, exactly how I left him, his eyes, big and full of emotion, he looks at me like a movie he hasn't seen in ages and was his favorite. He looks at me in a way that none's ever looked at me before.

"What?" I breathe out after a few seconds of silence.

"I-" He shakes his head, searching for the words. "I missed you." He says so quietly, I hardly heard him.

"What?" I say again, confused. He missed me? What does that even mean?

He puts his hand out, open for me to take. I look at it for a few seconds before walking towards him. I place my hand over his and his fingers immediately curl around it, pulling me even closer. He lifts himself off the couch, towering over me in a second and I lift my gaze to meet his.

He brings his free hand to my cheek. "You were beautiful."

I try to wrap my mind around this moment, the past few hours but I can't. All I know is that I feel whole again, my heart feels full, and my mind peaceful. I don't know how we got here and I don't care what will happen after we leave, all I know is that; he can't take this moment away from me.

He lets out a sigh. "We should get going."

My face falls. I don't wanna leave, I don't wanna go back. "Okay."

"Come on." He nods his head towards the way down. He picks up my bag from the floor and walks towards the stairs. I turn around to take one last look at the sky, letting the image soak in before following him down.

"I got you." He holds his hands open as I take the last steps of the stairs just in case, but my feet reach the ground safely.

We walk to the car in silence as expected. I don't know what to say either. What can I say? Now that we left the rooftop somehow this feels weird. He opens my door and walks to his side of the car without sparing me a single look. Great. I get inside, making sure to slam the door shut, and let out a sigh.

"Are you taking me home?" I question as we pull out of the alley and back into the main road.

He rubs his bottom lip with his finger, elbow resting at the open window. "I mean, yeah." He hesitantly says. "Are you- um, are you hungry or something?" he asks, fumbling over his words.

"No thank you." I let out a low chuckle at his sudden nervousness.

He turns to look at me, keeping his eyes on me instead of the road for a little too long. "What?" My tone louder than before, as I switch my gaze from him to the road. "Focus on the road!"

"Maybe we should stop for a quick bite." He turns back to the road.

"I told you I'm not hungry." I mumble.

"Mhm," He nods. "I heard you. "

"Minho, I just wanna go home." I quickly say, starting to get a bit anxious. Which he notices.

"Just so you know, I 've gotten through what you're going through." He lowers his tone. I look out of the window, noticing that he takes the familiar path towards my apartment.

"I don't wanna know what you're talking about." I cut him sharply.

He clicks his tongue. "Okay then. " He seems to take the message and drops the subject. I bet Chan must have said something to him about it, which immediately pisses me off.

The car comes to a stop, and before I can realize it we're outside my apartment.

"Thanks for tonight." I clear my throat. "For all of it."

He lays his head back, his hair falling perfectly into his eyes. "Anytime angel." He smirks.

I bring my lips to a tight line, trying to stop myself but I can't. I inch forward, placing my hand on his thigh for support, and quickly without giving myself time to think about it, I connect my lips to his. I feel him inhale sharply, not expecting the kiss but he responded immediately, cupping my jaw. Our lips move together perfectly, leaving the sweetest taste on my tongue as I force myself to pull away.

"Don't be a stranger." I bump my nose into his.

He doesn't say anything back, instead, he watches me get out of his car and inside the building before he drives off. I take big, fast steps towards the door of the apartment and fumble with my keys as I open it. I slam the door shut, resting my back against it. My heart is drumming in my chest and I place my hand over it, taking a few deep breaths. I don't know if after tonight I can go back to acting like nothing is happening between us. I can't go back to ignoring him and fighting all the time. I want him. And most importantly I want him to want me. I get undressed for the second time tonight, not bothering to check if Emma's back or not before burning myself under the sheets. I don't want to fall asleep cause I didn't want this night to come to an end. I didn't want reality to creep into my life again. But all good things must come to an end, I guess.

[levanterhaze]

✧ SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK (LEE KNOW)

→ dancer!lee know xdancer!f.reader

→ word count: 2.4k

→ when dancing is all you know, it becomes your great passion. studying at the apollo school of arts is like a dream come true. in one of your accomplishments, you have to work with one of the greatest talents called lee minho and accept that maybe feelings are confusing and abstract like slow dancing alone in the dark.

→ warnings: lots of angst in this one lol

CHAPTER THREE — (masterlist)

playlist: you don't go to parties anymore, 5sos.

Minho didn't mind being the prime focus. He was always clear about what he wanted from an early age and his ambitions never got in the way of him. Everyone recognized him and he didn't care. He was there for a reason.

It’d be the first day of being an instructor for Ms. Oh and he was self-reliant about it. While preparing the stereo for the beginning of the class, before the teacher arrived, he watched the room’s motion.

And something caught his attention. A new person. Talking to you.

He knew well who his classmates were, and Mingi wasn't one of them. Then Minho was baffled not knowing why he was with you, talking absently while pulling the dark blue strands back. He didn't realize he was pulling the cord until the stereo unplugged, causing a loud thud to echo through the room.

“Why are you staring at Mingi like you want to kill him?” Jisung suddenly appears, stretching his arms and pulling them by the elbow.

"You're seeing things."

"I think not. Did something happen that I'm not aware of?”

"No." Minho finished fixing all the appliances and raised his eyebrows. "You’re nosy."

“And you never tell me anything. Unfair. I’m your best friend.”

"Yeah. You're." They both pause and Jisung narrowed his eyes. Minho grins. "Unfortunately."

"I'll kill you."

And then Jisung pushed his best friend, trying to mount his back and making Minho laugh.

Mrs. Oh arrived in moments and the class started. The instructors helped the students who had more difficulty in some lessons, like breathing properly or getting some choreography positions that the teacher passed as a test. Most of them were doing well on the exercises, but sometimes someone would lose focus or balance, requiring help from one of the three.

Yeji smiled shyly at Minho as he helped her by holding her arms. It was the second time she had tripped over her own feet and that made him go to help her.

"Sorry, I'm a little lost today," Yeji mutters embarrassingly, feeling Minho's firm fingers around her wrist.

He just stammers something Yeji can barely hear. He's looking at you. Mingi and you. And the way he's shining at you like you've known each other for ages. And it infuriates him, he can't say why, but it infuriates him deeply.

"Everything’s fine?" Yeji asks as she tries to catch Minho's eye.

"Yes, everything is great. Just keep your balance, all right?”

He walks away from Yeji and walks back to the other side of the room, repeating the same movement as the other students, but his eyes betray him and he finds himself looking at you and Mingi now and then, just to see if your closeness continues and he tries to ignore the way Mingi looks at you, or the way his hands hold yours when he tries to steady himself, but deep down, he can't.

Fuck all this. He can barely understand why there's a soreness in the pit of his stomach that creeps up to his core like a tremor.

So the class goes by almost too fast and when everyone leaves, there are only three students left: the instructors. Chaeryeong offers to get the three of you some snacks and you accept an iced coffee and Minho too.

There’s a makeshift table used by Ms. Oh, so the three of you get together for your first meeting. You sit across from Minho, who’s tirelessly typing something into his computer.

“So, I was thinking” you start, clasping hands on the table. “We should think about a concept for our presentation.”

You wait patiently for a response, but Minho looks nonchalantly while not paying you any attention. You frown, leaning your body forward. “Are you listening to me?”

He sighs tiredly. You feel uneasy, as if you were a thorn in his side. “What do you want?”

You raise your brows. “I just said it but I guess you’re too busy to listen.”

“Thank God! You noticed I’m actually busy, congrats.” Minho doesn't even bother to glance at you. That comment made you drift away. 

“What's up with that attitude?” He made it. He managed to annoy you deeply. 

“What attitude?” He looks at you, briefly. “I just said I’m busy.”

“No, you did not.” You add through clenched teeth. “I don’t get you. First, you show up at my dorm saying you’d like to team up and when I try to cooperate you just treat me like shit?”

He closes his laptop with a swat, finally peeking at you. Somehow you find it so bothersome to pay attention as his eyes sail roughly through your face. It’s ridiculous how dainty he is, like a fucking Adonis or some shit like that, and it’s absurd that he can look this good when he’s being a total asshole. 

“Sorry to disappoint you, but not everyone’s lusting over you, giving you all the attention. Some of us are just busy, y’know?”

You were stumped. Your blood turns into thin ice. What was going on?

“Uh-Is everything okay?” Chaeryeong’s voice fills the place in a lovely innocent tone. You look at her discomfiting. Whatever Minho was going through, you didn’t want to be part of it. You weren't going to let him treat you like this, all shitty and everything. 

“Yeah. I-Um, actually, I have to finish some assignments for tomorrow. I’ll just email you my notes, ok?” You didn’t even worry about waiting for an answer, even though it wasn’t fair to Chaeryeong who doesn’t have shit to do about Minho’s shitty attitude. 

You haven’t any assignment to do, but you couldn't bear to be in the same room with Minho for any five minutes, so you need an excuse. You did send Chaeryeong your notes for the meeting and you wrote an apology in the footnotes, hoping she wouldn’t think you were unprofessional. 

Campus was dead silent at this time. Most of the students were having class at the moment, so there were a few people who wandered across the green premises. You felt weary. Like if you had run an intense marathon and it had drained all your energy.

Unfortunately, you couldn't focus on anything more than what happened earlier. How did he expect you to team up with him if he had this kind of attitude toward you? It was so out of the blue that you couldn’t even react properly. You knew he was mellow and austere, but you didn’t know that passive-aggressive shit about him. 

But how could you? You were not friends with him. 

You gasp while typing on your phone. One word was all it took for Yunjin to drop whatever she was doing to come to you. You typed in caps lock METEORITE. The code between the two of you when something wasn’t right and the antidote was to stick together. 

She found you in the nearest cafe. You ordered two choco chip frappuccinos because it was her favorite and you needed something sweet to make up for Minho’s bitterness. Yunjin was all in pink, in a cute dress, and her strawberry hair was loose in cute waves like a barbie doll. 

“What happened?” She sat in front of you. “I was doing my nails but I ran the fastest I could.”

“Sorry.”

“No, it’s okay. Was something with Ms. Oh?”

“Actually, it was Minho.” Yunjin's motion ghosts in the air, the straw almost going to her nostrils. She widens her eyes and then takes a long sip of her coffee. 

Then it took you almost ten minutes to explain everything that happened and Yunjin gave you her best support, saying she didn’t know Minho was like that. She hangs out with him more times than you, because of Changbin, etc. It was fine, you just needed some kind of stimulus not to believe you were overreacting.

You were not. Minho was being a bitch.

“You know what? Changbin just told me about this Pool Party next week and you’re coming with me.”

“I have nothing to wear.”

She looks at you with that grin with genius potential. “Maybe I have something in mind.”

The week passed quickly. Classes were great, and you're doing good with the instruction thing but you were late in preparation for the final presentation and that was on Minho. 

He didn't speak to you at all. Every time you walked into the room, he dodged every second of it. Chaeryeong didn't say a thing but of course, she noted something was off. You just admitted you had to do your presentation by yourself, without him, because he was being a dick as usual. 

So, Saturday came in like a breeze in the summer. Yunjin set up a nice black swimsuit for you to wear. She chose a strawberry-pink one for her, just to match her essence. The party was taking place at somebody’s house, but you knew that somebody was friends with the seven — Changbin, Felix, Hyunjin, Bangchan, Jisung, Jisung, Seungmin, and Minho. 

You had everything you needed when you came. It was a hot day so everyone was already at the pool. You found Felix and Seungmin in the kitchen. Felix was slashing oranges and limes to make some booze, you guessed. 

“Hey, stranger.” Felix grins when his eyes land on you. “Take this. It tastes sweet?”

You take a sip from whatever he was doing before. It was refreshing and sweet with a little bit of alcohol. “It’s perfect.”

“Told you, no more limes.” Felix points at Seungmin, who serves himself a cup of that drink.

You step out, feeling a little odd cause you only knew some people at this party. Some guys were playing with Nerfs in the pool and you were sure you had a glimpse of Jisung shooting water at Hyunjin. Yunjin was with her lovely boy — almost boyfriend. They were on so many dates that they should just be together at this point.

But she seemed happy and that was all.

You joined them, sitting on the rim of the pool. Felix hands you another glass.

That day was already nice, spattering water on Yunjin and Seungmin with Nerfs. Teaming up with Jisung just to see who swims faster. Eating Felix’s brownies and drinking a lot of that sweet orange drink he made. 

Changbin had the brilliant idea to do the chicken fight. First, it'd be you and Yunjin. She climbed onto her lover’s shoulders while you climbed on Bangchan’s. You tried your best not to fall, he was slippery and you didn't have a place to hold except his header — which you wouldn't do. 

And you were winning because you have more stability in your arms than her. You could see her slipping through Changbin’s shoulders but something caught your eye. Minho and Yeji.

You should've focused only on Yunjin. You shouldn't have glanced up at him. His damp blonde hair. His open black shirt and his sinewy body. He peeked at you and you only had time to mumble a fuck before your body slammed into the water. 

Bangchan helped you, asking if you were okay over and over. You were. One minute ago. Before Minho. 

It was childish, you had to admit it. How he was able to change your mood with just one look. You're still angry with him and that was all. He just surprised you, that's what tried to convince yourself. 

You got out of the pool just to drink a little more.

Fuck Minho. You wouldn't let him ruin your day. 

You were so comfortable before, you ain't even realized he wasn't here. 

Two drinks turned into three and then four. 

You're tipsy and happy. Yeonjun’s house — you discovered later that it was his place— was empty. Rosé and peach colored the sky and somehow the music was louder. You found yourself craving one of Felix’s brownies so you went to the kitchen to grab some. 

And your heart skipped a beat when you found Minho there. He was ignoring you still and that was a bummer. You could sense the alcohol touring through your system and every thought was a missed heartbeat. 

He looked at you, his raised eyebrow like he was challenging you. But you knew better and you wouldn't let him treat you like shit again. 

“You good?” His voice is calm, kinda treacherous though.

You open the fridge and then look at him over your shoulder. “Talking to me?” 

“There’s just us here.” He shrugs. 

“Why wouldn't I be good? I'm great.” You snort. 

You feel it when he gets closer. He rests his arms on the fridge door. “You look drunk.” 

You peer at him. “And?”

“You should have some water.” He points at the bottle inside the fridge. 

There was a hesitation that Minho wasn't expecting. You gathered all boldness hidden in your body to dart him in the eyes.  “I don't need you to tell me what to do.” 

And it was no shock when he didn't feel offended. He tongue his cheek, looking down at you “Yeah?” 

“Why do you care if I need fucking water? Wasn't you who said I was an attention sucker?” 

“I owe you an apology.” His soft talk makes you sigh. “I shouldn’t have snapped like that. It was a bad day. I’m sorry.”

At the end, you knew you could let this go. You didn’t hate him, you just wanted to be treated right, like a person at least. Minho looked sincere and you could tell by his eyes that he meant it. It could probably be the alcohol too — you’d definitely ignore that.

“You really didn’t mean that, tho?” 

He furrowed his brows. “No. Never.” 

That was different. The way he was looking at you, like you were friends — close friends. And the sweetener in his tone, you were unsure. He said nothing, his locks falling through his forehead and his greek nose was so close you could almost scent the citric cologne. 

You were close. 

Too close.

“I should go back. I guess.” You were so bewildered. Alcohol or not, you felt spell blinded.

Before you leave, he points again at the fridge. “You forgot your water.”

“Yeah. Thanks.” You nod, tenderly beaming.

You set off the kitchen just to discern seconds after that you didn’t go there for water. Minho said you needed water. You were so disconcerted you didn’t even realize. It was him.

On your way back Yunjin was frowning at you. But you could understand the “is everything okay?” in her eyes. You nodded. 

That’s because you didn’t have the chance to see what Yunjin saw. The gentle smug look on Minho's face when he followed you to the pool. The shyly yet fond smile crooked his lips while he had his head down.

Yunjin was confused.

But it was all about you. Because of you.

taglist: @taeriffic @ughyoobi

a/n: hi! if you want to be tagged in this one just let me know and i appreciate comments a lot, they're always welcome and motivates me a lot to write more.

[mortallya]

MC ࣰ ༘ ⃗ ◜ leeknow ◞