#Magnus is much easier bc he has autism and adhd too so i think that barrier of whats appropriate isnt something he has in mind
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Kinda wish I had less empathy and social understanding
#miranda talking shit#I still misunderstand people often and will do mistakes but bc im so aware of that fact im scared to talk many times#Like in the beginning when im new friends with people my filter will be thin and i will talk more but then when the new excitment is gone#I get so caught in my head im like.... What if i say something bad or insensitive or-#I feel im at that stage with oliver :') we used to be able to have all kinds of discussions but now bc im so paranoid of being weird we#Dont. So its just basic boring small talk and i am like whelp i dont like this#I understand he cant push for such topics bc he is technically an employee and a worker so he has to be professional#But any time i got us into such topics he'd talk without much problems and we'd discuss all sort of stuff#I miss that but im paranoid of making him feel uncomfortable or something like it. Idk the whole power dynamics is there i guess too and#Aware of it. I wish i wasnt but i am. Im too aware of that and i know we arent 'friends' and thus its the wholw.... Hes not talking with#Me bc he wants to but bc he has to. And i dont want to be an annoyance i guess...#And i know i have problems to spot if i make people uncomfortable or such unless they say something obvious about it#Magnus is much easier bc he has autism and adhd too so i think that barrier of whats appropriate isnt something he has in mind#Idk if im making sense here but yeah no kinda wish i didnt care about others atm#I love being careful and thinking about others but in these type of situations they make me feel bad?
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