#Mindy is impressive with this secret baby business

[soupsnakessss]

If Mindy is pregnant again, do you think BJ is the father again or is it another person?

This made me laugh about if it’s another person. It’s BJ.

However…. I might lose some of you guys here and you think I’m crazy— but after seeing Mindy at her SXSW event today, I think she’s already had the baby?! All the credit for figuring these things out goes to @heartcm and my other friend— this has all been a wild back and forth conversation for awhile of trying to figure this all out and the last couple weeks have been very confusing. But at this point all the signs are pointing to Mindy having had the baby. There were NO public sightings of Mindy at all after Kit’s birthday at Disneyland in December, outside of the short Mexico trip where she’s again, fully hiding her stomach in everything. Literally not a single instance of her out in public or seeing friends at all. This time of year is typically when she attends Lakers games with her dad too.

At the end of January she posted on stories about having multiple friends sending her takeout food… and she wasn’t attending work in person- it’s been all through zoom and she missed the table read for the basketball show a couple weeks ago. Most things she posts on instagram are delayed and not real time, and she had multiple videos where she’s visibly hiding her stomach, and in her last skincare video she’s very out of breath while again only being waist up with a coat on. This has all been going on up until this week when she’s suddenly popped up out and about again, going to the movies with Akshara and now the event today….

We shall see whatever chaos Oscar Sunday brings us tomorrow I suppose.

[cnisms]

ok u know what ? what i had planned was taking way too long n i don’t wanna rush myself so let me just share what i have n then we’ll take it from there xx HELLO AGAIN ! i’m emmy (she/her) of the house aest/gmt+10 aka yes i did wake up at 6am on a saturday then fall asleep halfway through putting this together. my things are intersectional feminism, avocados, inxs, dogs, history, and watching every single tv show to ever exist (except suits... one day...) ! i have 25 too many muses so get ready for one line on each ! don’t @ me bc they’re all fleshed out and if u wanna ask abt any of them, i’m ready 2 go off. do @ me bc i’m too lazy to finish their individual pages. anyways ! i love plotting so if ur interested... pick a muse or five and we’ll brainstorm !!

i do have a muse navigation here which you can click through. an amazing 2 out of 25 muse pages are completely finished, some have completed stats, most have shit-all. also, they do have intro posts in this tag but probably don’t read them bc they’re mostly messy and expired memes.

MARI RIBEIRO (camila mendes, 21) rich girl with her shit mostly sorted. was loved an unrealistic amount by her parents and now does the same to her friends. if ethan jumped off a bridge, would mari do it too? absolutely. always overreacting to something. can’t drive.

TOMAS TURUNEN (bill skarsgard, 25) pretentious romantic. mad at his dad and takes it out on everyone else w mind games. has probably killed someone. manages the bar in soho and that is literally... all most people know about his private (fake) ass.

CICI GAUTIER (elle fanning, 18) thinks she’s marie antoinette. filthy rich, filthy morals. does whatever jennifer meade tells her to if she can’t make someone else do it for her. uncomfortably obsessed with her cousin (no incest tho, i promise). very very little empathy. absolutely the type to costume change at any event.

WES KOTECHA (avan jogia, 24) has a lot of feelings, all of them hurt. plays guitar (and keytar but...) for liberal scum. tfw no gf meme. king of making dinner awkward by either bringing up his latest personal problems or just getting into politics. surrounds himself w vegans.

MINDY WILLIAMS (margaret qualley, 22) the goth girl kevsdgaf is always tweeting about. monotone. only listens to one direction or the cure. loves twilight and shakespeare. the weird girl who never got over her vampire phase. rarely experiences bad moods.

BECK HOLMES (alfie enoch, 29) big nerd. means well. loves learning and helping others learn. literally does not ever stop looking for new information to absorb. needs better friends right now immediately. does not have a life outside of his few friends n his books.

ROSIE RIVERA BLANCHE (eiza gonzalez, 25) my first muse... my baby... biological and adoptive daughter of rock royalty. got into acting instead. too good for the show she’s on but hasn’t gotten any other big offers. thinks she’s better than everyone else. friendship and romance? she doesn’t know either. just hugo.

ANGEL ROSADO (zoe kravitz, 24) heiress to a resort empire, head of a fitness one. competitive. has considered having other gyms burned down. has her head stuck up her own ass most of the time. dependent on her family. takes everything personally.

AJA PAREKH (naomi scott, 22) farm girl who was forced to run away to the city when family dramas got tough. can’t decide if her dream is to drive a van around europe or just milk some cows. super friendly, super annoying. doesn’t even know how to acknowledge a problem.

ARABELLA GOMFREY (gabriella wilde, 23) lucrezia borgia. pious. thinks her family are right about everything no matter how wrong it is. would do anything to make them look good. cliquey. likes surrounding herself with beautiful people but gets pressed if they’re cuter than her. nice until you come for her family. 

ZACH BALTAZAR (jamie blackley, 25) insecure or just lazy? he’ll crack a joke about it. deserves happiness but doubts that. is up for anything but will judge you the whole time. king of impressive first dates and romantic poetry then forgetting to text you back for a solid three weeks.

NATALYA BELYAKOVA (alicia vikander, 27) boring. literally just reads, works and wears pencil skirts. actually only moved to london to get bloody revenge on the people who killed her father and brother. good at keeping secrets obviously. smart.

ALANIS BAUMANN (emily ratajkowski, 25) a hero. literally scammed 9 different people for money telling them her baby was theirs before calvin shut that down. actually named her kid freddie mercury. would die for him. crude. just tryna have a good time.

CONSTANCE ABERNATHY (diana silvers, 20) church girl who didn’t wanna go to church or read her bible. got married young n ran away. not the one who put her husband in a coma but we all have our suspicions. was famous on vine and refuses to let it go. kinda mean. 

PARIS BAYOUMI (mimi elashiry, 20) full time kitchen witch. has a herb garden that she actually talks to. will ask how you are then immediately tune out. serene. unintentionally sardonic. tells detailed stories that literally no one cares about. no one knows anything about where she came from.

GWEN HATHAWAY (madchen amick, 43) soft spoken angel who can and will turn into the actual devil if you get in her way. still dealing with the 90s. has children somewhere. impulsive. always putting herself first. seems so sweet it’ll takes a second to realize she doesn’t care.

LUKE FALLEY (toby regbo, 25) the biggest pain in the ass. seems to think he knows everything. actually does not have a mean bone in his body but seems condescending. always got some weird shit to say. feminist. does not stop talking ever.

HELENA O’SHEA (lily james, 26) the girl who had it all together at a young age n then fell from grace. successful wedding planner who threw it all away out of embarrassment when she got dumped and called off her wedding. miserable. hates children. extremely organized.

GIA VISARIYA (charli xcx, 23) actual queen of youtube. writes n stars in a ‘reality’ series there. very loud and very friendly. thinks of everyone as a bff. if you end up in her contacts for whatever reason she will invite you out every weekend. needs some manners.

VERONIKA ERIKSON (angelina jolie, 40) goddess. half retired supermodel who has spent the last 20 years trying to have a baby. got divorced n “””moved on””” bc she couldn’t take the heartache anymore. iconic aunt. deserves the world. now flips houses to keep herself busy.

LUMA PONTECORVO (sofia black-d’elia, 23) such a bad influence that her older brother literally set her up in a different country so she would stop getting his kids into trouble. brat. always showing up to work late and hungover. cunty. mad abt her mom dipping.

ELIZABETH LEBLANC (margot robbie, 27) fakes the domestic goddess stereotype to please other people. gets her kicks from spending her dirty drug money on clothes and curtains. has experienced poverty and would probably kill before going back there.

AJAY JOHAL (rahul kohli, 30) everything he does is literally just in an effort to support his parents. super flighty. could not make a decision to save his life. super respectful. quality lad. maybe a lil immature but he’s working on it. sike ! he’s not.

PERCY NICHOLS (finn cole, 20) an actual stain. just a horrible lil shunt. screwed over his friends and got rich. would absolutely do it again. cheeky nandos. very smart but you wouldn’t know it. coked out. absolutely has to live a certain life. will never be satisfied anyway.

BOBBIE SANTOS (blanca padilla, 22) ruins lives w how angelic she is. ur annoying yoga friend who instagrams her food before eating it. doesn’t know how to mind her own business but thankfully isn’t very perceptive. glass half full. under educated. independent.

[wellesleyunderground]

Four Weddings and a Funeral reviewed by Lakshmi Gandhi (@LakshmiGandhi) & Asha Sundararaman ‘04 (@mixedtck)

This review first appeared on Lakshmi and Asha’s weekly newsletter - sign up here!

We love a good rom com and screenwriter Richard Curtis's 1994 "Four Weddings and a Funeral" has always been a favorite of the genre. (Who could forget Hugh Grant at his most bumbly and floppy-haired as he courts the elusive Andie McDowell?)

That was one of the reasons we were both surprised and intrigued when it was announced that Mindy Kaling would be making a Hulu series based on the classic film. This is also one of the reasons it pains us so much to reveal that the resulting series is NOT GOOD. In fact, it's pretty actively bad and is strange and painful to watch.

Fortunately, we watched (most of!) the available episodes so that you, dear readers, don't have to.

(Editor's note: As usual, we're going to spoil everything, but we can't imagine anyone voluntarily spending their time with these characters, so it's ok!)

Lakshmi: Asha, I hadn't read anything about this series going in for once, so while I knew the reviews were iffy I simply wasn't prepared for the extent of the badness. All of the scripts felt like first drafts? None of the romantic relationships made sense?! The New York Times review was brutal:

The show, which has almost nothing in common with the film except for a London setting, comes from the creators Mindy Kaling and Matt Warburton, but without any of the clever sparks they brought to “The Mindy Project.” Though it is set in England, the four main characters are American. They are allegedly best friends, but no one has anything in common nor do any of them have any chemistry, platonic or romantic. The inevitable couple seems like a bad match, and no two characters seem like they’re on the same show. Do not go to the chapel; do not get married.

Asha: I hadn't read much about it either. (Also, full disclosure, I actually haven't watched the original movie.)

Lakshmi: What?! We need to get that fixed immediately. But (as you’ve probably guessed) the basic premise is that Hugh Grant goes to four weddings and a funeral (of course) and all of the characters grow and change as a result of those five events.

Asha: Right, makes sense. (Also, I promise that I will watch the original film soon.)

Lakshmi: But in addition to the original being super white and super upper crust English (which is different from this adaptation in perhaps a bad way) the film had a lot of depth. This series has all American main characters and is just strange because so many aspects are nonsensical.

First, what are the odds that all of your good friends from your college experience in the US will land cushy jobs in London?!

Asha: Right?! I went to grad school in London, so I kept wondering how all of them had work visas! Banking, I could see, but starting a design business? Working as a teacher? None of it makes sense!

Lakshmi: And none of them even have English parents or seemed to go to grad school there (two other routes to getting visas). Also, since none of them are actually married when the series begins, they don’t qualify for spousal visas either.

Asha: Exactly.

Lakshmi: So there was a definite "what about Brexit? How did any of you get visas?" feeling throughout my viewing experience.

Asha: Mine too, especially having lived there.

Lakshmi: Yes! And you can definitely speak more one this (I've never lived in the United Kingdom) but my impression has always been that it is REALLY hard to get a UK work visa. And Brexit of course makes it clear that the political climate is not friendly to non-UK born people or immigrants of any kind.

Asha: it's definitely not easy. I know people who've done it post-grad school, mostly working for multinational corporations. But moving to London after college on a whim? Nah.

Lakshmi: Right. The only people I know who moved to London on a whim did so without documentation (meaning they worked off the books in restaurants while they had their quarter life crisis or whatever).

So Brandon Mychal Smith's character's job is the only one that sounds legit (he works for a giant financial institution.)

Plus,  these people would never be friends in real life. Additionally, no one is likeable and no one has anything in common. There is no thread that unites them at all (and the same goes for all of their partners)

But let's back up a little and talk about the plot.

The pilot episode starts with Maya (Nathalie Emmanuel from ‘Game of Thrones’) arriving in Heathrow for one of the weddings in the show's title. Her bag goes missing and she throws a fit (she's extremely unlikeable in those scenes!) and an airline manager, the middle aged British Pakistani Haroon Khan (who is played by the Indian actor Harish Patel) asks his son Kash to help her.

That is the big meet cute of the first episode. The twist of course is that Maya soon discovers that Kash is engaged to her friend Ainsley and in fact their wedding is the one Maya flew to London to attend. I have no idea what Kash and Ainsley saw in each other and the subsequent scenes never give us any clues either!

Asha: Well, to be fair, I think that was the point. They liked the facade of each other, rather than who they actually were.

Lakshmi: But they never talked about anything? Ainsley is definitely part of the one percent (her parents fund her entire business AND rent a London townhouse for her.) Kash lives with his widower father and little brother in a working class neighborhood.

Plus they were going to have a Church of England wedding and no one talks about how they are of different faiths (the dad mentions it as an aside only after things go south). And the dad makes a joke about not drinking alcohol yet Ainsley gifts Kash with whiskey glasses (I get that Kash obviously drinks alcohol, but it's still strange that they ever made a "oh we're not supposed to be doing this" joke or anything.

Asha: Well, it is pointed out in episode 2 that the whiskey glasses were a bad gift...

Lakshmi: But not because of the religious tradition thing! But because of because of the impersonal nature of whiskey glasses as a gift.

And it's strange (especially in England of all places) to have a relationship like that and never talk about money or standing or whatnot.  It was one of the many reasons I wished this show had been transported to New York or Boston or LA or somewhere else in the United States.

Asha: But once again, that was kind of the point, they didn't talk about anything!

Lakshmi: So why were they getting married in the first place? And all of the couples had the same problem! They were all terrible communicators.

Asha: Yes, that's true.

Lakshmi: Why were Zara and Craig together?

Asha: I have no idea.

Lakshmi: Craig was the Brandon Mychal Smith character who worked at the huge bank. Zara herself spent a lot of her time exotifying him too.

I also need to point out (and this continues Mindy's terrible record with regard to writing Black characters)  all of Craig’s storylines were AWFUL and I feel comfortable calling them othering and borderline racist.

For example, there is a joke in which Craig says six girls asked him to prom and the punchline is that "one of them was my Spanish teacher." (And readers know me well enough by now to know that was a huge cringe and a big no for me.)

And then! He gets a message out of the blue from a girl he hooked up with six years ago and it turns out.. dun dun dun... he has a secret baby! Gross and also... why didn't they give one of their upper crust white British male characters that storyline? Choosing to give your only Black character a secret baby is a weird decision! It just seemed unnecessary and his partner was so disconnected from him and the realities of his life.

Basically, I cannot believe that money and class weren't more of an issue in all of these relationships with British people. Mindy must have read Austen at some point? (or any other British novel, hahaha)

Asha: One would think! But they actually do bring up class issues a bit in episode three with their British friend Gemma. She's "new money" which means she ends up being the butt of the joke in her British social circles.

Lakshmi: Yes, that was interesting! But by episode three the series had been so frustrating to me that I couldn't appreciate the good parts as much as I should have. For example, episode one was BAD but episode two was JUST MEDIOCRE and episode three was JUST OK but the badness of the pilot made my tolerance for the rest go down a bunch.

Asha: I want to say that the show does have some good parts! I enjoyed the relationship between Kash and his family.

Lakshmi: Yes, I loved that as well. The dad was a well written character. And they watch a British game show that is a lot like Jeopardy! every night, which felt like something most South Asian families would do Plus there were little asides where they did talk about religion and those also felt real.

Asha: I actually feel like the dynamic between Kash, Kash's dad and his brother was the best part of the show. All three were the standout characters of the series.

Lakshmi: I wish they had made Kash the central character, rather than Maya.

Asha: Agreed.

Lakshmi: And the child who played the little brother Asif was also very good.

Asha: Definitely

Lakshmi: I liked this thread by the author Rachel Hawkins on the show:

Nathalie Emmanuel deserves better than Four Weddings and a Funeral, OOF. I ADORE Mindy Kaling, but this is so bad I kind of can't believe it exists.

Asha: The entire show was just so underwritten.

Lakshmi: And I know I keep sounding like a broken record but we never really see why these characters are friends.

Asha: Well, they might be that group of college friends who are best friends because they were best friends in college and would have grown apart if it weren't for the fact that they all moved abroad

Lakshmi: Perhaps... but usually those tight bonds don't last even if you do end up being in the same place. I mean, why live in England (or set your show in England) if the characters hang out with and act like Americans all day.

Asha: Hahaha, that was the one realistic thing to me actually

Lakshmi: I don’t know...this would have been a great show to set in Boston or another upper crust New England town. I show featuring characters that went to boarding school and their working class New England friends would have been so good. (and that concept hasn't been explored in a modern day show in a while.) Plus, Mindy is from Massachusetts! She missed the boat there!

Asha: Well...she did go to private school, and to Dartmouth....

Lakshmi: So it's her world! She should have done it!

Asha: Her world was minus the working class New Englanders!

Lakshmi: She could have gotten other writers for those scenes. I feel like a lot of the parts that especially annoyed us would have been eliminated had this been an American show..

Asha: That's probably true.

Lakshmi: You've seen “Love Actually,” right?

Asha: Yes.

Lakshmi:  So a lot of the scenes here were like “Love Actually” fanfiction (another thing reviewers pointed out.) There's a novelist who flirts with a woman who speaks English as a second language. There's a weird choir that pops up during one of the weddings.

Those scenes with the French teacher did illustrate how fragile male writers are!

Asha: Hahahahaha

Lakshmi: Seriously though! Anyway, the character Duffy gives her a draft of his novel to read. It's a 1200 page book (and everyone knows about my strong belief that nothing needs to be above 350 pages!) and he asks her for honest feedback.

But when he receives honest feedback he goes nuts and acts like a baby (which is totally unsurprising.) He’s even so upset that he asks her to leave his home.

Asha: he does make amends later on, once he realizes that none of his friends who praised his book had actually read it.

For the record, her feedback was that there were 20 pages of that 1200 that were great! Plus, those pages she liked were at the end, so he should be appreciative that she engaged with the work! His was so gross and so thin-skinned.

Asha: it really means that you're too attached to your work and that you see it as a reflection of who you are as a person. It also means you're not ready to be a professional writer.

Lakshmi: I strongly feel that the way people respond to edits reflects who they are as a person. This has nothing to do with the show at all really, but I maintain there is one way to know everything you need to know about a person, and that’s by FACT CHECKING THEIR WORK.

The person who blows up when you ask "oh,where did you get that stat from?” is insecure in all aspects of their life. Also, "Remember to spell check" is never a personal attack, but you'd be surprised at how many people act as if it is! So I think that's why I had such a personal reaction to that scene (and kept wondering at why Mindy and the other writer put it in.)

Asha: Hmm...I don't agree that it reflects who they are as a person. But i do think it means they're probably insecure, ha.

Lakshmi: So you do agree it reflects SOME aspects of their personality. I don’t know, as a fact checker, I just want to make sure we're accurate and don’t get sued! But I'm kind of used to people blowing up when I ask questions like "can you send me the link to this study?" (which should be a neutral question but rarely is).

ANYWAY, another annoying thing was how Maya randomly decides to stay in England after going through her own breakup and then starts interviewing with Members of Parliament essentially right away. Again, my brain went to the place of "what about Brexit?!”

Asha: Same.

Lakshmi: Even the most liberal Labour Party member probably doesn't want to deal with the optics of hiring an American on a whim? There are people in England who would kill for those jobs...

But it was interesting to see Maya process the aftermath of her affair. She had been working for a New York Senator and had an affair with him. She then realizes that she never knows why these other politicians are granting her interviews. Are they hoping for an affair as well?

(Maya is VERY talented but she feels like people are overlooking her skills because of her personal life.) I actually thought those scenes were some of the most realistic of the series.

Asha: Well, other than the fact that she was an American interviewing for British political positions, which as we’ve noted wasn’t at all realistic.

Lakshmi: Of course. But that internal conflict was very real.

Lakshmi: OK, we went well over our usual time! (We always have strong feelings about Mindy's work!) My final thought was that I just couldn’t believe this novelist dude thought his friends had read his work.

I feel like writers would be a lot happier if they realized their nearest and dearest probably aren't going to read their stuff (and oftentimes won't even buy their stuff!) and that sometimes that is all for the best.

Asha: Agreed.

Lakshmi: Also if you ask for honest critique and then blow up when you receive it 1) you aren't a good person 2) you shouldn't write publicly, because Goodreads reviewers aren't going to be as kind as a woman invited to your house as a guest. (She was really sweet about delivering the feedback; everyone should be that kind and deliberate when giving honest reactions.)

[randomrichards]

MOVIES (THAT MIGHT BE) WORTH CHECKING OUT IN JUNE 2019:

June 7:

DARK PHOENIX

We begin with the last part of the X-Men prequel series.

Led by a young Professor Charles Xavier (James McAvoy), a small group of young mutants have grown from students to superheroes. They can even travel to space to rescue astronauts. But one interstellar mission goes wrong when telekinetic psychic Jean Grey (Sophia Turner) absorbs a mysterious energy. She not only survives, but she’s become more powerful. But this power begins to corrupt her mind, which attracts the attention of a mysterious woman (Jessica Chastain). Soon she becomes the destructive force known as the Dark Phoenix. Now her friends and mentors must decide how to stop her. Charles and Jean’s boyfriend Scott “Cyclops” Summers (Tye Sheridan) try to save her from the corrupt energy. Metal-bending holocaust survivor Erik “Magneto” Lehnsherr (Michael Fassbender) believes the world can only be saved by killing Jean. We also see the return of fan favourites including Peter “Quicksilver” Maximoff (Evan Peters), Raven aka Mystique (Jennifer Lawrence), Hank “Beast” McCoy (Nicholas Hoult) and Ororo “Storm” Munroe (Alexandra Shipp).

Dark Phoenix saga is considered one of the most beloved X-Men stories of all time. It was the story that made Jean both a complex character and one of the most powerful characters in the Marvel Universe. Fox Studios tried their hand at the story in X-Men: The Last Stand. The results were less than stellar. If they fail the second time, there will be hell to pay from the fans.

That’s where Simon Kinberg comes in. This will be his directorial debut after writing previous X-Men movies. This is a mixed bag. On one hand, he wrote one of the best X-Men films; Days of Future Past. But he also wrote the Last Stand as well as the underwhelming X-Men: Apocalypse. It also doesn’t help that he wrote Fan4Stic and This is War. So, we’re just going to have to wait and see if it will live up to the legendary story.

LATE NIGHT

Mindy Kaling draws inspiration from her early years as a TV writer for Saturday Night Live and The Office for this career-driven comedy.

It looks like Molly Patel (Kaling) is on her way to becoming a tv writer when she gets her first writing gig as staff writer for “Tonight with Katherine Newberry.” But she already feels out of place as the token hire in a room full of white male Harvard grads. It doesn’t help that the host(Emma Thompson) is a real hard ass. Unfortunately, Katherine has her own problems. She’s plummeting in the ratings and if she doesn’t turn it around, she will be gone in a year. In desperation, Katherine seeks advice from her writers to spruce up her image. It looks like the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Many will notice parallels between Late Night and the Devil Wears Prada. Like the later, Late Night centres on a naïve young woman dealing with an over demanding boss in their attempt to achieve her dream job. As you may already know, The Devil Wears Prada was a surprise hit thanks to Streep’s unique portrayal of feared fashion magazine mogul Miranda Priestly and there were a few attempts to replicate it. The result is hit and miss at best.

For this to succeed, both the writing and the performances must click. The script needs to have a clear understanding of the business it’s portraying. With this in mind, Kaling has an advantage with her experience as both a tv writer of The Office and the creator of The Mindy Project. But writing for a weekly sitcom is a little different from writing for a daily late-night show.

The most important character to get right is the boss. The writing must make this character entertaining, with many hilarious lines for the actor to deliver. Plus, the audience must buy that this character has earned respect in the business. As for the actor, she not only have to deliver a hilarious performance, but must also bring some humanity into this archetype. Not only did Streep provide a unique spin to the Boss from Hell with Priestly, but she also made the character human. If anyone can provide the same quality, it’s Thompson.

THE SECRET LIFE OF PETS 2

Illumination takes us back to their surprise hit about what pets do when the humans aren’t allowed.

While the first film centres on one storyline, this one seems to be divided the film into multiple stories. The first plot centres on canine protagonist Max (Patton Oswalt replacing Louis C.K.). He has gotten used to new dog Duke (Eric Stonestreet), but now he faces the idea of his owner Katie (Ellie Kemper) getting married and having a kid. But on the plus side, they get to go on a road trip to the countryside. But that goes downhill when Max gets terrorized by a turkey. In desperation, he seeks guidance from stern top dog Rooster (Harrison Ford) to overcome his fears.

Meanwhile, Max’s friends are having their own adventures. Max’s toy is left in a cat lady’s room and Max’s love Gidget (Jenny Slate) disguises herself as a cat to get it back.  At the same time, deranged bunny Snowball (Kevin Hart) has gone from freeing pets to playing superhero for a little girl. But he seizes the opportunity to be a real superhero when a dog named Daisy (Tiffany Haddish) calls on him to rescue a white tiger named Hu from a circus.

When Illumination introduced the world to Gru and his Minions with Despicable Me, it felt like the animation world has a new voice. With a collection of memorable characters, fast-paced visual gags and a unique, hipster-esque look, the film seemed like a breath of fresh air, especially compared to the similar film Megamind. Since then, the film has presented one hit film after another, especially the Secret Life of Pets. Then audience members began losing patience for Illumination for two reasons. First reason was the Minions. At first, they became fan favorites of Despicable Me.[1] But then they were everywhere, from carnival prizes to memes. Overexposure set in and no one could stand them anymore.

Another problem was that Illumination played it too safe with their movies. They play it too safe with their budget, creating each film with a much lower budget than most animated movies. While it’s miracle for an animated film to be made on a low budget, the result is less impressive animation and more rehashed character designs. Just as unimpressive is the storytelling, which most often uses tired tropes with little refreshing spin on it. The Secret Life of Pets itself was accused of being a Toy Story rip off. Apart from the Despicable Me movies, Illumination Movies are considered mediocre at best.

It’s important for filmmakers to grow as artists to avoid becoming stale and complacent. But I’m not holding my breath in this case. I will say this film may serve as a good afternoon out for the family.

June 12:

ROLLING THUNDER REVIEW: A BOB DYLAN STORY

Coming to Netflix is this rockumentary from Martin Scorsese. Need I say more?

Scorsese had already made a documentary about Bob Dylan with No Direction Home. Now he narrows his focus to Dylan’s 1975 Rolling Thunder tour.

As if I need to defend interest in this movie. It’s Martin Scorsese after all.

June 14:

AMERICAN WOMAN

Sienna Miller plays Deb, a blue-collar woman struggling to make ends meet in a small Pennsylvanian town. She faces her worst nightmare when her teenage daughter goes missing, leaving Deb with her grandson. The film takes place over 11 years as Deb raises the baby and tries to find closure with her daughters’ disappearance.

American Woman’s already garnering acclaim from its premier at last year’s Toronto International Film Festival, especially from Miller’s performance as a desperate mother. It looks like the film will hook us into the desperation of a woman trying to keep a roof over her head. We may also see a realistic look at the struggle of living in poverty. In these moments, we may also see the strength that allows people like Deb to survive in such environments.

Sadly, it looks like this one will be swept under the radar unless Miller gains awards consideration.

THE DEAD DON’T DIE

Jim Jarmusch takes an unexpected turn into Zombie comedy with The Dead Don’t Die.

The little town of Centreville finds its peaceful existence threatened when zombies rise from the grave. That’s the plot in a nutshell. What could make this film stand out is the quirky characters including Bill Murray as Police Chief Cliff Robertson, Tilda Swinton as katana-wielding mortician Zelda Winston and Iggy Pop as a coffee-loving Punk Zombie. Also, among the cast are Adam Driver, Steve Buscemi, Danny Glover, Selena Gomez, Carol Kane, Rosie Perez, RZA, Chloe Sevigny and Tom Waits.

This is probably the least likely film for Jarmusch to make. He’s usually known for droll character studies. His films do have humor, but it’s usually low key. The trailers make this film seem like a broad comedy. I suspect this could be a trick by the trailer considering I see a few of Jarmusch’s trademarks; droll acting, eccentric characters and roles played by musicians.

I suspect that Jarmusch loved how George A. Romero inserted satirical commentary into the Zombie Genre because you can see similar elements in this film. Both films have zombies copying activities they’ve done in life. In this case, we see zombies holding cell phones and drinking coffee. It would be interesting to see what satire Jarmusch puts into the film.

MEN IN BLACK: INTERNATIONAL

We return to the intergalactic secret agency, though without Agents J and K.

A young woman (Tessa Thompson) has found the MIB Agency after decades of searching. This impossible accomplishment impresses Agent O (Emma Thompson) so much that O recruits her under the name Agent M. Her first assignment takes her to London, where she’s teamed up with leader High T (Liam Neeson) and fellow Agent H (Chris Hemsworth). Their case brings him face to face with the Hive, a gang of shape-shifting aliens. Cue an array of giant laser guns, flying cars and noisy crickets.

A spin off to such a successful franchise is a huge gamble. The chances of success are very slim[2], especially when the original films starred one of the most charismatic actors of all time. Yes, Hemsworth, Neeson and the Thompsons have a lot of charm, but filling the shoes of Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones is a daunting task. The film seems to have potential with a variety of environments, creative weapons and creative alien designs. Plus, it looks like the little alien Pawny (Kumail Nanjiani) could be a potential scene stealer.

There is hope in the form of Director F. Gary Gray. He’s proven his skills as an action director with The Fate of the Furious as well as underrated gems like The Italian Job and Set it Off. He’s also proved he can direct comedy via Friday. With this resume, it seems fitting for him to direct a movie like this. It may not hold a candle to the original, but at least this film looks like it will be entertaining.

June 21:

ANNA

Luc Besson really loves himself some lady killers, doesn’t he?

This time the lady killer is Anna Poliatova (Sasha Luss), a former Russian model turned Government assassin. There’s not much known about the plot beyond her boss (Helen Mirren) sending her to a job in Paris. It’s certain to involve Luke Evan’s character. It also looks like the film will be structured around an interrogation between Anna and Cilian’ Murphy’s agent.

But let’s be honest, you don’t really watch a Luc Besson film for the plots. You watch it for the badass action scenes and eye-catching visuals. The trailer certainly delivers on these, with one standout fight scene in a dining room, cultivating in Anna killing bodyguards using broken plates..

The question is if the plot is engaging enough for us to sit through two hours? Or should we just wait for the dining room fight scene to appear on YouTube? Unfortunately, his films have been lacking in quality in recent years. This one could turn it around, but I suspect this is another example of a director letting his style run amok at the expense of storytelling.

CHILD’S PLAY

Chucky returns to the big screen after a couple straight to video sequels.

Many of you know the story like the back of your hand. Single mother Karen Barclay (Aubrey Plaza) buys her son Andy (Gabriel Bateman) a Chucky toy. Then one night, Andy’s babysitter’s found dead outside of her home. And as everyone knows by now, it turns out the Chucky Doll (now voiced by Mark Hamill) is possessed by a serial killer who’s determined to pass his soul into Andy.

Like many horror fans, I’m tired of all the remakes of horror classics. Everyone knows they are lazy cash grabs. They are especially unnecessary we are seeing a growing number of original horror movies.

I will admit I find the idea of Chucky connected to the technology ala Alexa interesting. To think of him manipulating the environment present opportunities for more original kills.

This film will mark the first time Chucky’s not voiced by Brad Dourif. I have high hopes for Hamill, but like Freddy Krueger, you can’t imagine anyone else playing these characters because the original actors made the characters their own. You only hear Chucky’s voice at the end of the latest trailer, and it sounds a lot like Dourif’s. But it’s not enough to judge Hamill’s performance. I’m still not holding my breath.

THE COMMAND (or KURSK)

On one Saturday morning of August 2000, an explosion sends the 2000 K-141 Kursk to the bottom of the sea. Now Mikhail Averin (Matthias Schoenaerts) and fellow German sailors fight for survival. Meanwhile, Mikhail’s wife Tanya (Lea Seydoux) fights to get the Government to save her husband. British Commodore David Russell (Colin Firth) offers his men and equipment to rescue them but the bureaucracy led by Vladimir Petrenko (Max Von Sydow) prevent them from doing so.

Drawing from Robert Moore’s non-fiction book A Time to Die, The Command brings an unflinching portrayal of Government negligence putting innocent lives at risk and average people putting up a fight for those they love.

Director Thomas Vinterberg has had a fascinating career. He’s started out as one of the founding members of Dogme95, a film movement that involves making films as realistically as possible. Not only were you required to shoot improvised and on location, but you couldn’t even move the set pieces or use film lighting. This led to his most acclaimed film Festen (or the Celebration), an unflinching drama about a party where the staff helps a man reveal that his father molested his sister and drove her to suicide. But in recent years, he has flipped between sticking to his roots with the recent film the Commune and his Oscar-nominated film the Hunt and period dramas like Far from the Madding Crowd and this film. He’s proven himself just as skills with conventional films as he is with his Dogma.

This film has a better chance of gaining attention since it’s an English-speaking film. But this may be another film only show in arthouse theatres.

TOY STORY 4

Pixar returns to the film that jump started the revolution of CGI animated classics.

Woody (Tom Hanks), Buzz (Tim Allen) and their friends are enjoying their new roles as Bonnie’s toys. Now Emily’s new toy includes Forky (Toby Hale), a neurotic toy made from a spork, popsicle sticks and googly eyes. Woody makes it his duty to protect Bonnie’s new favourite toy. But Forky would rather be a disposable utensil than a toy. During a road trip, Forky hops out the window to freedom and Woody jumps out to get him back. Of course, they end up lost and need to talk a long journey back. Their long walk leads them to Grand Basin, a small town where a carnival’s taking place. That’s where he reunites with his old flame Bo Peep (Annie Potts), who enjoys an independent life alongside other antique toy. He also encounters arrogant Canadian stunt toy Duke Caboom (Keanu Reeves) and a creepy doll Gabby (Christina Hendricks), who’s determined to keep Woody at an old antique shop alongside her creepy Dummy henchman.

Meanwhile, Buzz is at Grand Basin to look for Woody. His attempts are undermined by the carnival, especially two hostile plushies Bunny (Jordan Peele) and Ducky (Keegan-Michael Key).

When Toy Story came out, it revolutionized the animation industry. Not only was it the first CGI-animated film, but it put Pixar on the map as a force to be reckon with. It also set a standard in storytelling for the later films to reach, which it kept surpassing with each sequel. Then it hit its highest peak with the third movie, which served as the perfect send off.[3] It’s exciting to return to the series. Albeit, there are some reservations about making a fourth movie, especially with how perfect Toy Story 3’s ending was. But with Andrew Stanton (co-writer of the original trilogy and the Director of Finding Nemo and Wall-E) co-writing the script alongside Stephany Folsom, I have a lot of hope for this one. And many want this to succeed.

WILD ROSE

A Scottish woman becomes a Nashville country singer. A feel-good premise like this is sure to make audiences curious.

The singer in question is Rose-Lynn Harland (Jessie Buckley), a troubled ex-con struggling to feed her family in Glasgow. Now she faces many struggles to get back on her feet and achieve her dream. Considering the fact many country singers were ex-cons, it looks like she’s off to a good start.

Audience members love themselves an underdog story and this one seems like an entertaining one. Plus, Buckley’s garnering acclaim for her performance. If this film gets enough attention, this could be a sleeper hit.

June 28:

OPHELIA

Based on the novel by Lisa Klein, Ophelia retells the story of Hamlet from Ophelia’s point of view. This can either be compelling or blah. It depends on whether the writing can go beyond just being “Hamlet...but with Ophelia” and present a whole new perspective on the tragedy and bring new dimension to the characters. There have been successful attempts with Paula Vogel’s Desdemona: A Play about a Handkerchief and especially Tom Stoppard’s Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead.

The question is, does Semi Chellas have what it takes to pull this off? The only real standouts in her resume are writing for Mad Men and the Romanoffs, which fit into the character-oriented drama like Ophelia. Director Claire McCarthy seems to do a lot of films of people traveling to foreign countries. Beyond that, nothing really stands out about her work.

What she does have going for her is an astounding cast including Clive Owen, Naomi Watts and Daisy Ridley taking on the title role.

YESTERDAY

What if you woke up one morning and found you were the only person who remembered the Beatles? That is what happens to struggling musician Jack Malik (Himesh Patel) when he goes through the classic trope of getting knocked upside the head and waking up in a world where weird shit like this happens. He takes advantage of this opportunity to claim credit for the songs and garner worldwide fame.

What does concern me is the premise can fill two hours of screen time. To me, this seems like it could fill a half-hour short film. It all depends on how engaging the characters are, especially Jack. If we can’t relate to him, it’s all over. There is hope with co-writer Richard Curtis, whose created classic romantic comedies including Four Weddings and a Funeral and Bridget Jones Diary as well as co-creating Blackadder and Mr. Bean. But he’s also written mediocre romantic comedies like About Time, so there’s no guarantee.

And then there’s director Danny Boyle, the man whose energetic directing style has provided such modern classics in every genre, whether they be anti-drug dramas (Trainspotting), biopics (127 Hours) or even an underdog story from India (Slumdog Millionaire). But his films have become more hit and miss lately, with no real standout since Steve Jobs.

There’s strong credibility but no guarantee.

[1] Most of this is because unlike other sidekicks, they contributed more to the plot beyond random gags.

[2] There are a few spin offs that succeeded both critically and commercially. Among them are Creed, Deadpool and Finding Dory.

[3] Plus, it’s the only sequel to win the Oscar for Best Animated Feature.

[gossipgirl2019-blog]

Why surprise celebrity gossip is the best celebrity gossip

New Post has been published on http://gr8gossip.xyz/why-surprise-celebrity-gossip-is-the-best-celebrity-gossip/

Why surprise celebrity gossip is the best celebrity gossip

IF THERE’S ONE thing I live for, it’s good gossip. Gossip that makes you exclaim, ‘Gway.’ Gossip that must be shared with the Whatsapp group immediately. Gossip you didn’t see coming at all.

Over the past year, we have been treated to a heap of genuinely surprising celebrity gossip. Pregnancies, relationships, and weddings have been kept private only to then be unveiled to the public like a new bronze statue. 

‘Surprise! Anna Kournikova and Enrique Iglesias Just Had Twins’. Twins, you say? They won’t be able to hide, run or escape their love! ‘Amy Schumer Is Married! See Photos From Her Surprise Wedding’. A surprise wedding and photos? Click. ‘How Rachel McAdams Kept Her Pregnancy a Secret Before Welcoming Baby Boy’. For the love of God, tell me!

The last few months have been even more exhilarating. First came the bombshell that not only was Michelle Williams dating musician Phil Elverum, but she had in fact married him in an intimate ceremony in upstate New York. Then came the news that Rashida Jones had ‘secretly’ given birth to Ezra Koenig’s baby. (A boy, Isaiah.) While I was still recovering from that revelation, I learned that indie film darlings Zoe Kazan and Paul Dano had also welcomed a secret baby. (A girl, Alma.)

Now I know that this is all rather niche stuff and that I am probably one of about seventeen people who truly care about Zoe Kazan and Paul Dano’s baby girl. (Side-note: can you imagine how many prairie dresses this child already owns?) But it does point to a trend: namely that more and more celebrities are making a concerted effort to keep their  business out of the public eye. 

In February of this year, Kylie Jenner announced that she had given birth to daughter Stormi. For months prior, she had kept people guessing as to whether she was even pregnant, throwing fans off the scent by posting old photos of herself on Instagram. Following the birth of her daughter, she posted a statement outlining why she had chosen to eschew publicity and keep her pregnancy private.

“I’m sorry for keeping you in the dark through all the assumptions,” she wrote. “I understand you’re used to me bringing you along on all my journeys. My pregnancy was one I chose not to do in front of the world. I knew for myself I needed to prepare for this role of a lifetime in the most positive, stress free, and healthy way I knew how.”

Jenner’s decision to withhold news of her pregnancy from fans was unusual in that it seemed at odds with how she had lived the rest of her life. After all, this is a young woman who spent her formative years on reality television and was later such a powerful social media user that she managed to kill Snapchat with a single tweet. That she consciously chose to keep that sweet pregnancy content from her adoring fans was commendable, if perplexing.

But there was method in her madness. After keeping everyone on tenterhooks and allowing wild conspiracy theories to percolate for so long, her birth announcement turned out to be a genuinely surprising and satisfying ending. “So that’s why she was hiding from us!”

In an age where celebrities are more accessible than ever, there is something refreshing about stars going off the grid only to emerge months later with a newborn baby or a wedding ring. Even more impressive is when they have been tweeting or Instagramming away in plain sight without once alluding to their pregnancy or engagement. (I still have the utmost respect for Busy Philipps not spilling the beans on Michelle Williams’ marriage.) 

Plus if Rashida Jones and Ezra Koenig are out here secretly dating and procreating, then who knows what else is happening right under our noses? Maybe Jenny Slate will step out with someone from Bon Iver. Maybe Mindy Kaling and BJ Novak are happily married. Maybe Grimes will break up Rupert Murdoch and Jerry Hall. Who knows? The possibilities are endless. 

God, I love gossip.

DailyEdge is on Instagram!