#Realizing I keep misspelling that so rip you fire boi that's just your name now

[therantingsage]

Super old oc time!! Current Sage as an entity technically has no use for assassination, but these guys still exist and remain, in case the need ever returns. They're her cool secret task force, technically.

When I was a kid, I had this cringe thing where all of them except Pryomania had a crush on Jelly and were competing for her attention in a really healthy way (not even saying that ironically). But love triangles with the girl trapped in the middle are boring to me now, so now they are a cool polycule, though once again not including Pryomania. Murder polycule and Pryomania, who is also there platonically.

Individuals and info under the cut.

Jelly is an ordinary rabbit, considered especially cute by her partners and most others. She has a pair of invisible claw weapons, and she combines them with her unassuming and disarming appearance to deadly effect. Personality-wise, she is slightly mischievous, and her adorable attitude that she uses on duty is not an act, she genuinely is just happy a lot of the time.

X is the last surviving member of his species. Ink creatures were known to be particularly deadly and dangerous, and were thus targeted and nearly wiped out during the Era of War. X was born to the previous last member of the species, who died soon after. In a post-war world, his particular powerset has few outlets, so he was recruited by The Sage as protection (for him and for others both). The dark teal bulbs on his body can emit inky spores, which in addition to being toxic, grow entrapping vines that grow faster when broken.

Aestheno-Snakes come in two varieties; the wired and the non-wired. Wired Aestheno-Snakes can manipulate solids of any density as if they were clay using the wires attached to their bodies, and use them to fashion false limbs they can control with their minds. Sleon is a non-wired Aestheno-Snake, which are far, far rarer. Non-wireds are actually much more powerful; they can only control one kind of solid that is determined at birth...but they turn anything they touch into that solid, midas style (including living things, thus his role as a Moon Assassin). Sleon's solid is a putty-like substance. It can be smelted into an indestructible ceramic material, and The Sage makes extensive use of this fact. She's also put a spell on him and the other Moon Assassins that renders them immune to his material conversion. His helmet is made from the putty-ceramic, but the serrated blade on his tail is natural.

Pang is calm and chill, but was not in their childhood. Their lightbulb-like tail is not characteristic of Sky Deer, leading to Rudolf-adjacent treatment by their peers. Unfortunately, the tail gathers feelings of stress and agitation inside them and manifests them externally as powerful bolts of lightning that target the nearest living creature. If you're sensing a theme here, yes, it is incredibly deadly. Exiled from their home, they eventually were taken in by The Sage and given therapy to help control their emotions and powers. When not on duty, they wear a cap on their tail made from Sleon's ceramic, preventing any accidents.

Pryomania, being the only one here not part of the polycule, is a bit of an odd one out. Fire Lights are a subspecies of Light Creatures, a subset that is rare and dangerous. Their fiery forms are untethered, so they must confine themselves in a vessel of their choosing. He'd been living in a vase before The Sage found him. She commissioned the ball he now uses, allowing him to both roll around in it and fly, as it is very light. He is mute, as are most Fire Lights, but he has figured out how to use his body to blow-torch words onto surfaces in order to communicate with the others.

[quicksilversquared]

How to Fake a Marriage Outtakes: Chapter 6

Chloe had been eagerly counting down the days until Adrien returned to Paris, looking up the last day of his term and his graduation day so that she would know when to expect him back home. It would take him a few days to pack up, probably- her daddy said that moving countries was really hard, and Chloe had looked around her room, thought about what moving everything in it would be like, and agreed- and then he would be back in Paris.

While Adrien had responded to her congratulations about graduation, he hadn't said when he would be back. Chloe chalked that up to him being busy and waited very patiently, planning for his return.

She would throw a party, of course. Not a large one, of course- she was expected to mingle with her guests now that she was a young woman, rather than just spend time with her oldest friend and let the rest of the idiots that she had to invite just to hold up appearances eat and dance as much as they wanted- but with enough people that Adrien would actually come. She would hold it in one of the upper conference rooms and invite a few of their old classmates, maybe.

Well, if she still had their contact information. Chloe had had to clean out her contacts a year ago since there were simply too many people, and a good number of them were people that she didn't care about. But that would just cut back the guest list more, which was good. Fewer guests meant fewer people for Adrien to get distracted by, when he was meant to be paying attention to her.

But she couldn't plan anything without knowing when Adrien would be free, so in the meantime Chloe went shopping to find the perfect outfit, one that would make her utterly irresistible. After all, it had be ever so long since Adrien had seen her in person, so she really had to knock him off of his feet. And maybe she would have to see him in person first to ask him to the party, but Chloe never passed up the excuse to go shopping and so she didn't let minor details like that bother her.

Chloe found a backless blue dress, adorned with blue crystals that made it glimmer after several hours of browsing. She got it altered to fit her like a glove- Adrien's jaw was sure to drop- and headed back to the Grand Paris with a spring to her step. She had nearly gotten back when she spotted a very familiar blond head in the crowd ahead of her, bobbing and weaving through the throngs of people. Chloe sped up, catching up to Adrien in no time flat.

"Adrikins!" Chloe exclaimed, pouncing on his and pressing a kiss to his cheek. "It's been so long! You're free now, right? We have to go out on a date, just like old times!" Chloe wrapped her arm around his, already picturing where they would go. She had visited a terribly romantic little diner recently, one that had lovely private booths and gorgeous lighting. If Adrien hadn't been thinking romantic thoughts about her before- and obviously he had to be, at least a little bit, since they were perfect for each other, and besides, distance made the heart grow fonder and all- he would be after they had spent a little time together tucked into a back booth together. "I know just the place- come on, and I can tell you what I've been doing! And then you have to come back to the hotel and see Daddy, because you haven't been in ages and I know that he would love to see you."

Adrien must have accidentally taken a step that was too big or something, because suddenly Chloe had to tighten grip to keep her hold on his arm. "Chloe, let go."

Chloe pouted. "Why? It's not that warm yet, and I'm not going to wrinkle your shirt or anything," she added, getting her first proper look at Adrien's shirt. It was a plain cotton t-shirt with some awful English Physics joke on it. It was hideous, and entirely unsuitable for any sort of date. Maybe they would have to add a trip to a store before they went to the cafe, because Chloe clearly had to fix Adrien's fashion taste before he got too far. She couldn't have the tabloids catching her with someone dressed like that, even if that person was supermodel Adrien Agreste. "Where did this ugly thing come from?"

Adrien actually ripped his arm away from her this time, and Chloe was left stumbling, gaping as she fought to regain her balance. Once she had found her footing, she scowled at Adrien because really, where had his manners gone? Were all Londonites savages raised in a barn?

"Um, excuse me," Chloe started, incensed, but Adrien cut her off.

"We have never dated nor gone on any dates before," Adrien told her, ice positively dripping from his words. "I really have no idea where you got the idea that we have. Besides, I'm engaged now. I would appreciate it if you didn't hang on to me and try to kiss me."

He said something more, something about the shirt and his fiancée, but Chloe didn't catch it. She had frozen, her thoughts racing a million kilometers a minute.

Adrien was engaged? But that- that was impossible! He was supposed to be with her, and now some hussy had come in and taken what was meant to be Chloe's, and- and-

Chloe was vaguely aware of her screeching and someone dragging her away from Adrien as she fought them, and then nothing. When she finally came back to herself, she was laying on her bed, tear tracks on her cheeks.

It had just been a bad dream. That had to be it. Chloe wiped off her face and made a beeline for her computer, waking it up and immediately typing Adrien's name into Google. A huge list of articles came up, and Chloe had to blink to clear her eyes to read them all.

Adrien Agreste back in Paris for good! See what Paris's favorite model has been up to!

Adrien Agreste seen on date! Click here for pictures!

Adrien Agreste Engaged?

A Secret Engagement? Here's What We Know About Adrien Agreste and HIs Maybe-Fiancée

Check out the ring on Adrien Agreste's date's finger! Secret engagement?

Adrien Agreste: Shotgun Engagement and Wedding to Old Friend?

Chloe gaped and then moved, frantically opening as many articles as she could. No, no, no. This was still a bad dream. It had to be.

But all of the articles showed the same thing. Adrien, holding hands with a petite dark-haired woman. Adrien, clearly on a date with the woman. A zoomed-in shot of her finger, where a silver ring glittered.

It wasn't that impressive of a ring. Chloe couldn't even make out the stone, which meant that it was lame. Maybe it was just a promise ring or something-

-except Adrien had said that he was engaged, too, but maybe he slipped up and meant that he was going to get engaged but hadn't done so yet, because Adrien definitely made enough money as a model to get a proper ring, one with a large stone and maybe a circle of smaller stones around the center one, too. A big ring.

Except if Adrien was planning on proposing, that was just as bad. He was with someone else.

Chloe turned her attention back to the computer, frantic to figure out who this woman was. Maybe Chloe could scare her away and get Adrien back. It had to be some woman that Adrien picked up in London, so maybe if Chloe made it clear that Paris wasn't going to welcome her, she would go back home with her tail tucked between her legs.

Except on second glance, Chloe recognized that face. That was Marinette Dupain-Cheng, and she looked all too comfortable with Adrien holding her hand, Adrien hugging her, Adrien kissing her. She was one of the only people to stand up to Chloe, which meant that she would be hard to chase away. Impossible to chase away, at least until Adrien realized what a mistake he was making.

Chloe refreshed the page, just in case there was any new news, and winced to see that an article had popped up featuring Adrien and "the screaming Mayor's daughter". She clicked on it angrily, because whoever the so-called reporter who wrote it was so asking to get fired.

She had not screamed. She was a nice, polite young lady who was being denied what had always meant to be hers, what had been chosen for her when she was a child.

Scowling, Chloe reached for her phone, wasting no time in pulling up Adrien's name and messaging him, hitting the keys so hard that one misspelling appeared after another and she sent the messages anyway, too angry to care.

She was going to get Adrien back, no matter what it took.

  As it turned out, it was pretty impossible to win someone back when they blocked her from seeing them.

  Chloe hadn't liked the idea of the cruise at first. She had had plans, darn it. She was going to go to Adrien's wedding (ugh) and object to the marriage, to keep her Adrikins from making such a big mistake. But her Daddy had talked her around to the idea eventually, pointing out the exclusivity of the cruise and all of the famous actors and singers and businessmen who frequented such cruises. There was the occasional member of a royal family, too, and, well...

If Adrien was going to be stupid, then Chloe would go find someone smarter, at least until he wised up. Someone handsome and rich and smart who would pay attention to her and not get distracted by other people. And there were loads of young, fit, well-off men who fit those standards on the cruise, so Chloe packed her best dresses and bikinis and summery outfits and cheerfully headed off, remembering to buy some sunscreen last-minute before she hopped on the boat.

She wanted to get tan, of course, but not burn. Freckles and red skin weren't a good look on anyone.

From the moment that Chloe stepped on board, she was enamored. It just dripped in wealth and luxury, and she wasn't going to be finding any low-grade, common men from off the streets on board, wasting her time by flirting with her when they had nothing to offer. Everyone was gorgeous and rich and famous.

Oh, she would fit right in. Even if she didn't find a boy-toy to play with while Adrien was off being stupid (or to keep, should Adrien not immediately decide that marriage with Marinette was a mistake), she would make the connections to find someone suitable.

Chloe followed the butler who had welcomed her to her room. It was a gorgeous, large room, full of lovely paintings and mirrors and a complimentary fruit and chocolates basket. There was even a bottle of wine to go with it.

Chloe inspected the label. They didn't skimp with the complimentary baskets either, it seemed. It was actually a good wine.

It didn't take long for her to log into her computer, making a Facebook update about her room. She took a quick selfie to attach to the post, and then headed out to explore.

And oh, she had to go on this thing every year. Chloe would do all of the sponsorships that her father could find for her if it meant that she could come out and spend two weeks in utter extravagance.

Well, almost all of the sponsorships, at least. She did have standards, after all.

But she could worry about that later. For now, Chloe had a boat to explore.

  Three days in, Chloe was still in heaven. She had met several very handsome, very rich movie stars that were- well, not all of them were exactly her age, but they were close enough- and had gotten to show off two of her bikinis. The amazing blue dress that she had bought for the welcome-home party for Adrien that had never happened had made its proper debut at a fancy dinner the night before, and she had gotten plenty of interested looks.

She would have to pick out a new target by the end of the cruise, but for now Chloe was content to flit from man to man, snapping selfies to post on Facebook and Instagram. She resisted the urge to send a few of the photos to Adrien just so that he could see what he was missing out on, but she wasn't going to waste thetime on him, not anymore.

He hadn't responded to any of her texts for months now, and she wasn't on his list of friends online anymore, either. So if he was going to be immature about it, then she was going to find someone better to spend her time on.

And oh boy, could some of the actors on the boat give Adrien a run for his money.

Chloe sauntered across the pool deck, pulling off the light wrap she had on as she passed a couple of the men she had her eye on. She didn't look back as she passed to see if they were watching because, well, of course they were, and besides, looking back would destroy the illusion of detachment and mystery. She perched on a deck chair- and she would have to talk to her father about replacing the ones that they had on the pool deck at the Grand Paris, because these were much more comfortable- and pulled her sunscreen out of her beach bag.

She could have put it on in her room, sure, but Chloe had long since mastered the art of seductively putting on sunscreen. Arms first, fingers curled artfully as she rubbed the sunscreen in. She moved to her shoulders, her neck, then moved to her legs.

Legs extended, feet pointed, a look of light concentration on her face. She had to make sure not to frown at all, because wrinkles were such a no-no. She moved on to her stomach, her shoulders-

"Can I get your back for you?"

-and bingo.

Chloe smiled at the man- Charles, she thought his name was?- and handed over her sunscreen. "Oh, that would be fabulous."

Once her sunscreen was on, Chloe lay back in the chair, drinking in the sunshine. She chatted with Charles for a few minutes until he got pulled into a game of pool volleyball, and then she watched as eight very fit men splashed around in the pool in front of her. A waitress stopped by, carrying drinks and tasty little treats for them to snack on.

This was heaven. Chloe would have to hit the gym for a little bit later on to make sure that she stayed in shape- it would be horrible to gain weight when she was wearing a bikini every day- but that was fine. There would no doubt be plenty of eye candy to stare at and talk to while she was working out, which made it so much more fun.

The next week and a half flew by. Chloe flirted with the men- unfortunately, some of the guys that she had initially been interested in weren't single, and one had even been married (whoops), but there were plenty that were single or in only very casual relationships- and hung out with models and actresses while sunbathing. She added plenty of new contacts to her phone, and told people to come to the Grand Paris and visit her if they were in the city.

She hadn't started dating anyone, but she had several possibilities, gorgeous men with sharp jaws and lovely eyes. They were focused on being in shape for modeling and acting, which she probably wouldn't be able to say about Adrien if he insisted on being a nerd and burying himself in dusty books and unflattering lab coats.

In Chloe's (admittedly limited and somewhat biased) experience, academic types tended to end up with "dad bodies", which were not attractive to her in the slightest. Chloe preferred her men fit and lean, thank-you-very-much.

"Did you have a good time, darling?" Mr. Bourgeois asked when he picked Chloe up at the end of the cruise. "You look happy."

"Oh, it was lovely, Daddy!" Chloe exclaimed as their driver accepted her luggage from the cruise butler and carried it to the waiting car. "Their pool was so nice, and the meals were fabulous, and it was such fabulous company- can I go every year?"

Mr. Bourgeois hummed. "Well, we'll see. It's quite expensive, but I think we might be able to handle it."

Chloe squealed. "Oh, thank you, Daddy! Thank you!"

And as the car peeled away from the dock, Chloe couldn't be happier. She glanced back at the towering cruise ship, a smiling playing at her lips.

Adrien? Adrien who? Chloe couldn't care less anymore. She had found other options, flashier ones, more famous ones, better ones. Men that actually were interested in her, not Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

And it was fabulous.