#accepting that the fall was worth it??? unreliable narratorship or not thats a tough pill to swallow

[thesherrinfordfacility]

do you think current crowley wishes he could go back to the angel he was and tell him that his nebula, his stars, will be safe, that he himself will directly help to save them, and not only the stars but also the earth and humans that that sparky other angel likes so much. reassure him that his efforts won't be for nothing, he doesn't need to ask questions!!! he doesn't need to challenge anything, because it'll all be okay and he can trust that everything will work out fine

but then also stop. calculate, and understand that in order for everything to be okay... crowley has to ask questions, has to go through what he did, the pain and rage and abandonment and silence that comes with it, it's inevitable - because if he doesn't fall, doesn't become the demon he is now, everything that follows will never have happened, he'll never experience humanity, never get to buy the bentley, or feed the ducks, or grow his plants, or save the world, or fall in love??? and actually consider if the fall was worth every bit of pain and rage and abandonment and silence... if, in exchange, he gets all that????