#afundiebunch

[a-fundie-bunch]

"Grace, I'm home."

"...Grace? You in here?"

"...oh, no. Watcher, please, no."

[a-fundie-bunch]

Grace Williams here. You know what? I'm done. Done with Willow Creek, done with my stupid family... just done.

I'm leaving tonight - packed my suitcase and everything. I mean... who's going to stop me? Not Mom or Dad anymore, not my sisters, and definitely not Jason. No way I'm accepting my little brother as my 'headship' or whatever the church calls it. And anyway, he's at work.

Where will I go? No idea, honestly. I'll probably just leave town, and... I don't know, figure something out, I guess. Make money off social media, maybe? That's what Mom did, and it worked for her... well, until she got old. Maybe it'll work for me too.

[a-fundie-bunch]

Finally... the baby's here. I'm so glad that's over. Watcher forgive me, but I hate being pregnant so much that I've barely had time to pray for Mom. Not that she deserves my prayers... may she rot in hell.

...I'm still stuck with my and Daniel's mistake, though. It's another boy, by the way - his name is Ethan.

...Thank The Watcher that Joe thinks Ethan's his son. He's been a little happier lately - mainly because he gets to brag that he has three sons now. And Leah's happy too, I guess - she gets to help raise another one of my children. At least she's doing something with her life... even if no one wanted to marry her.

As for me... I'm never going anywhere with Daniel again. That was the biggest mistake of my life. I can only pray Joe never finds out... Watcher help me if he does.

[a-fundie-bunch]

Hi, I'm Eve Allen. Today me and Mom and Rachel went to church to pay respects to our neighbor, Mrs. Williams. She just passed away - may The Watcher rest her soul.

Mrs. Williams' children were all there at church as well, so we sat and talked to them. I ended up sitting with her son, Jason. I really felt bad for him - I can't imagine losing my mom so young. So we sat and talked about all the good memories he had of his mom, and prayed together. I hope I made him feel a little better.

After church Mom wasn't happy with me because I put my hands on Jason when I was trying to cheer him up - I'm not supposed to touch boys. But I was only trying to make him feel better. I'm sure The Watcher will understand.

[a-fundie-bunch]

I still can't believe it... first Dad, now Mom's gone too. Gone forever. Sure, me and Mom didn't always see eye to eye on everything, but... I loved her. We all did. Watcher keep her.

We all got together today to say prayers - or at least, that was what we were supposed to do. But it was only me and Zoe who were praying. Grace and Phoebe just... sat there and argued and insulted each other the whole time. Why couldn't they stop for just one day?

You know... sometimes I just don't know what to do. I need my dad to come back and tell me how to be a man or... something like that. Or Mom to come and nag me. I even miss that these days.

But they're not coming back. I've just got to figure everything out myself, I guess. Honestly... if I didn't have to stay strong for all my sisters, I'd probably just sit here and cry.

[a-fundie-bunch]

From the Willow Creek Church website

In Loving Memory of Naomi Williams

We at Willow Creek Church are sad to announce that Naomi Williams, widow of Stephen Williams, has gone home to be with The Watcher. Naomi passed away peacefully at home early this morning, with her son and daughter by her side, after a long life of love and service.

A devoted homemaker, loving wife, mother of four, and grandmother of five, Naomi was a woman of deep faith. She stood by her beloved husband Stephen from young adulthood until his passing, and served him and their four Watcher-loving children with a smile.

Through her successful social media ministry, Naomi served her community with love, spreading Watcherly wisdom to women of faith everywhere and bringing so many together in fellowship and worship.

She will be mourned and missed by all who knew her. May The Watcher rest her soul.

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Please, fellow men and women of faith, pray with me and Paul for our dear daughter Susanna!

She's totally out of control - always destroying things and throwing tantrums and making messes outside our beautiful home! Today she even made poor Esther cry! Even Paul can't control her anymore!

I just want my little girl to be sweet and loving again - to be gentle and meek and obedient, just as The Watcher created her to be. I'm praying for her... praying with all my heart that He will guide her and show her the way.

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"Mom, why does only Isaac get to go to school and we have to stay at home all the time? It's not fair!"

"It is fair, sweetie. Isaac's gonna have a really good job when he's all grown up, just like Daddy, so Daddy wants him to go to school and learn a lot!"

"But Isaac always gets everything! He even gets a room all to himself - I have to share with Eve and Rachel and stinky Esther! And he doesn't have to do any cleaning!"

"Susie, you shouldn't envy your brother - you know that's a sin. And we talked about this in Book Study, didn't we? The Watcher made boys and girls to do different things, so sometimes we have to treat Isaac a little differently, so he can grow up strong and smart and do all the things The Watcher created him to do!"

"Just because he's a boy? But Mom, boys are so gross and stupid! Why would you love him more than me?!"

"Oh, no, sweetie, I don't-"

"I hate you! I hate Isaac and I hate Daddy and I hate you!"

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Isaac started high school today - a secular high school. I can only pray that his faith will stay strong, while he's surrounded by all those un-Watcherly people and ideas... may The Watcher guide him and bless his soul!

I really, really didn't want him to go, but Paul insisted - and even if he's not a man of faith anymore, he's still my husband and headship. I just have to be submissive, and trust him to decide what's best for our son... even if it's difficult sometimes.

At least I'm still allowed to homeschool our daughters - to teach them how to be women of The Watcher, how to be pure and sweet and obedient. I don't know what I would do if I couldn't keep them safe at home with me - Watcher save them all!

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"I've had enough of this homeschool nonsense, Sophia. I'm enrolling Isaac in high school."

"What?! Like... secular school?! Paul, no... you can't-"

"I can, and I will. He's a smart kid - he needs a real education."

"But... but what are they going to teach him there? They'll indoctrinate him, Paul, make him lose his faith! Please, you need to reconsider this!"

"Ugh... how many times do I have to say it, Sophia? I don't give a damn! I want my only son to go far, okay? And he's not going to go anywhere if all he knows is... whatever religious crap you force on him."

"But-"

"Don't bother arguing. I make the decisions in this house - don't forget that."

"...what about our daughters?"

"Do whatever you want with them, I don't really care. But Isaac's going to school."

"...okay."

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Josh Hall here. It was me and Maria's wedding today - still can't believe I've got a wife now! Sure, she's a little older than me, and maybe I could do better. But she's pretty enough, and she does what I tell her, and that's all I need really.

I'm just praying her dad doesn't find out we actually had our first kiss before the wedding. He'd kill me if he knew. It was worth it, though... kinda.

I moved out after the wedding - moved in with the Browns instead. Yeah, I know - my wife's supposed to join my family, not the other way around - but there's no room for her back home. And anyway, I don't want Maria around Phoebe - that woman's no good. She'll give Maria ideas.

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"I thought you were praying for a boy this time!"

"I was, Josh, I really was! I promise!"

"Oh yeah? Then why did we have another girl, huh?!"

"I... I don't know! It's probably just... The Watcher's plan! He probably just... wanted us to have another girl, or... something!"

"Oh, that's just great. And who's gonna carry on my family name, then?"

"Uh, well... we can always have more kids, Josh!"

"Really? I don't know about that, Maria - you ain't exactly young and pretty anymore, are you?"

"Josh... please...!"

"Please what? Are you gonna cry? Run to your mommy and daddy?"

"...no..."

"...that's what I thought."

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"...We're never gonna get married, are we?"

"Oh, c'mon, Jess, stop worrying. We're still young. And anyway, I thought you wanted to wait."

"Yeah... well, I used to. But seeing Nathan and Zoe so happy together, with their kids... I kinda want that too, now. But there are no single guys my age around here... none that go to our church, anyway."

"Well, then... what about at work? No good guys there?"

"Nope. Just teens. And anyway, I don't want to marry just any guy - he has to love The Watcher as much as I do."

"Yeah, I get that. You just have to keep praying, Jess - The Watcher will lead you to the right one."

"...yeah, I know. And I will. I'm just getting impatient, is all - I 'm not gonna be young forever."

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Nathan here. Things have been busy at church lately - there's always so much for me to do as pastor, especially on Sundays. But I always manage to make time for the greatest blessings The Watcher has given me: Zoe and our children.

Speaking of children... we're expecting our fourth! Zoe's pregnant again - we found out this afternoon! We can't wait to welcome another child into our family!

Our other children are growing up well too. Joanna's still just as sweet and joyful as ever, and our little twins, Michael and Miriam, are infants now! They're all so sweet and precious, and I'm proud to be their father.

I'm praying every day that they'll all grow up healthy and happy, and that with our guidance, they'll always live their lives by The Watcher's Word. That's all I could ever want for my family.

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Tom Hall here. You know... I think Hannah was right about us not homeschooling. Hailey's actually doing pretty well at school, and so is Ella now - she aged up not too long ago.

Sure, I had my doubts at first - I mean, how could we not? All we heard about public school growing up was that it was evil, and un-Watcherly, and indoctrinating our kids. But I think we made the right decision - our girls are doing great. (Even if I do have to sit with them to make sure they do their homework!)

We have plenty of fun as a family too - school's not everything, of course. I always take the girls to the park on the weekends, and Asher and Madison bring their little ones to play too. I still remember when Tyler and Alyssa were just babies - and look at them now!

I've got to say... growing up, I never thought I'd have this life. I never thought I'd ever be this happy. But I am now - I've got everything I've ever wanted, and even more.

[a-fundie-bunch]

Hi, Joe Hall here. My boy Lucas aged up not too long ago. Thank The Watcher he's not a toddler anymore - damn, that was rough.

Anyway, he's a child now - old enough for me to take him out fishing and teach him how to be a real, Watcher-loving man. He learns fast, too. I'm one proud dad.

Matthew aged up too - he's a toddler now. He's... kinda soft, honestly. Always crying and following Leah around the house. Too soft for a boy, I think.

Eh... whatever. He'll learn when he's a little older - I'll teach him. For now, though, I just gotta pray for him.

Oh, and... we're gonna have our third soon! Phoebe's pregnant again. I thought it was about time - it's been a while since we had Matthew, and honestly, I was praying we'd have another one.

Not that she's gonna raise this one any better. Or at all, really.